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Moonmask999 Archive

View 12 posts and 120 comments by Moonmask999 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

block and delete when you break up the first time. break up with him asap when he cheats. idk why you made a post you’re not even asking for advice. Build stronger boundaries. Respect yourself more. Move on. it doesnt matter if he comes back or why- Stop thinking about him.
/r/askFDS30/10/20 08:59 PM
36

I don’t base his value/character on his relationship with his family. Anyone can have a shitty family. If he has poor boundaries with his family, that’s terrible and I break up with them. You should be of priority above the family because at the end of the day, it’s you and him, not you and him with the family. They probably won’t be in your life often- why would he prioritize them? He should prioritize you. what if his family is racist or sexist? what if they say something mean about you? he sh…
/r/askFDS30/10/20 06:34 AM
13

the fact that you ask this question and made a pro and con list speaks volumes. dates are “meh”- do you want that for the rest of your life? you already divorced him and say the sex is good yet you are debating again. What will make you happy? Do you want this for the rest of your life? You giving him taking? edit- also I totally understand wanting deep conversations. if you think he can change because you said he works on issues, stay with him. Think about what YOU want for the rest of your lif…
/r/askFDS26/10/20 03:21 AM
18

He’s poor at communicating and wasted your time. block and delete. If you decide to give him another chance, he might do this again, and you will have wasted even more time with him.
/r/askFDS24/10/20 03:27 PM
25

I would argue that it’s their poor emotional control that leads them to become angry
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 02:48 PM
5

You can’t help others who don’t want help and won’t listen. If you have already tried to sit down and talk with her about it, then there is no hope telling her. Her statement of why says that she’s super desperate and thinks no one else will be with her. which is really sad You can try to sit down with her one last time to make it clear that he is an ass, she deserves better, and that you are there for her to make her feel like someone is there for her. Still call out his behavior, still stick t…
/r/askFDS17/10/20 11:49 PM
14

Tonight I’m going to do a face mask. I’m pretty busy, but I will always carve out time for that. tomorrow I plan on going out and doing one of my favorite activities, atleast for an hour
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 08:01 PM
10

yeah that line is a bit creepy. Lines like those, where people (especially men you’re interested in) say- believe them. There have been several times where a guy I was flirting with have said “you’re too good for me”, “I’m actually in a really bad spot right now,” “I don’t have my shit together” etc. basically it is a warning to not date them. So take it as a good sign that you’re not together
/r/askFDS17/10/20 04:35 PM
14

I’m doing the same exact thing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 04:11 PM
6

ask this question to /r/actuallesbians or /r/AskLesbians or /r/bisexual FDS is about attracting HVM, and does not promote chasing guys
/r/askFDS17/10/20 03:48 PM
33

You need the improve your self esteem. Read the handbook. Create the abundance mentality. You are working on your boundaries- keep that up. if you get intrustive thoughts, grab a piece of paper. split it down the middle with a line. on one side put what the intrusive thoughts are saying. then on the other side, write down what would happen if a specific thought wasn’t true. ie voice says “you are unlovable, he hates you” challenge that thought with “I am awesome! he saw we weren’t a match and we…
/r/askFDS17/10/20 03:34 PM
41

What specifically do you miss? Do you miss a warm body to snuggle with at night? Do you miss someone to love? Do you miss sex? It's ok to feel lonely time to time- we're extremely social after all- but specifically the "male companion" loneliness is a bit different. There's ways to curb the feeling, depending on what specifically you are missing from those relationships. If it's the warm body, buy a heated blanket or heavy blanket. If it's sex, buy a new vibrator or other toys. If it's connectio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 07:04 PM
9

I understand what you mean. When did this feeling start? Have you ever been suicidal in the past?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:51 PM
16

Just went and played frisbee with my dog. Sometimes there are down moments in the coronavirus, but I hope everyone can find some happiness even if they can't socialize due to social distancing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:46 PM
17

omg the onesie and her voice at the start just made me stop watching after 20 seconds. "Signs she's cheating on him?" Why would a women want to cheat on a man, she'd just break up with him if she was HV, and another women making a video on "signs she's cheating on you" is a waste of time. Haha I am so jealous! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 04:25 AM
14

Do you mean like projecting? I'm so sorry to hear that. That must have been devastating, especially after your initial gut reaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 10:31 PM
7

Before you said your age I thought he was a teenager by how he was snap chatting you! also like the other commenter suggested, just block and delete him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 09:34 PM
69

There isn't a post about this specifically in the handbook that I can point to. I'd say that most people on FDS (including me) do not support age gaps. There are different things to keep in mind when choosing what age men you will date. Power struggle. This goes away the older the people are, (like below some people think if you're over 25 or 30 its ok) and is something to keep in mind. Why would someone date someone X years younger? if the situation was reversed, and you were 46 and he was 35, …
/r/askFDS15/10/20 03:32 PM
23

I’m so glad she’s still alive. horrifying story
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 02:46 PM
2

that’s ok, it basically means to throw something away really fast. some people even say “yeet” as like a sound effect when they chuck it. urban dict says “To discard an item at a high velocity” Alex finishes his soda and proceeds to yeet his empty can into a trash bin Alex (while throwing the can): “YEET!” hope this helps
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 10:07 PM
37

YES! There's no need to be jealous or envious of other women. Just inspired!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 02:52 AM
15

omg this is quality, I am literally laughing my ass off
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 02:48 AM
12

saying "yeah I'm free next weekend" is too much. you're right just unmatch him asap.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 01:22 AM
1

I think someone already posted this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 10:04 PM
3

Know your worth be the change you wish to see in the world today is a new day
/r/askFDS13/10/20 04:44 PM
11

yes! no more reposts/links from /r/relationships or other subreddits. we can go subscribe to them if we want that content
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 06:17 AM
4

I like memes for empowering women. less about bashing pickmes or hating on LVM in text convos when she should just block and delete. I’d rather see HVW and HVM memes, and ive been trying to make memes with that content. More positive uplifting empowering memes! I hate seeing links to news or articles about rapists or pornsick men. I immidiately hide all of those posts. Strategy posts and stories from our users in what they’ve experienced are the best. personally, honestly im tired of posts compl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 06:12 AM
6

I’ve also had to cut out an old best friend for the same reason. We didn’t have a fight, or fight about it, but she and I changed in different directions. it’s important to stick to your boundaries. you can’t help people that don’t want to be helped. I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone who takes you for granted or stops respecting you.
/r/askFDS13/10/20 02:15 AM
2

hahah even more time to myself! Gracias
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 12:50 AM
17

This is terrible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 10:50 PM
6

Block and delete. You have to be assertive and enforce your boundaries. Realize your worth in life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 04:05 PM
27

First. Block and delete him on all forms of contact and social media. Go back into your hobbies. What makes you love life and feel alive. You say you're a mess and you don't know why- because ending a relationship removes some need that was fulfilled. That's why there are conflicting feelings. Now you need to fulfill that for yourself. Date yourself. Practice self care- a bath, face masks, paint nails, etc. I'm proud of you for breaking up with him. You will still think about him for a while and…
/r/askFDS11/10/20 03:41 PM
21

FDS does not promote asking a man for exclusivity. Have her read the handbook. Keep her options open by dating several men at once Then, if he wants to keep her, he will ask for exclusivity. But keep in mind on that "GIRL GAME PT. 1: Males, Monogamy, and Mate-Guarding." post I linked to that Monogamy is for marriage and women do not benefit from monogamy before marriage. To stop recreating these habits, definitely have her read the handbook. During the divorce and after the divorce, have her dat…
/r/askFDS11/10/20 03:23 PM
23

You will have other relationships. There are plenty of other guys out there. Break up with him. Stop doing the chores for him and work out an exit plan. stop helping fix his house. find an apartment or airbnb (depends what country you’re in) to stay at. also read the handbook
/r/askFDS11/10/20 05:16 AM
9

there’s a settings option where you can disable all private messages
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 11:43 PM
68

You have to ask yourself why are you attracted to someone who hurts you? is it because deep down, you have low self esteem? you think you don’t deserve love? or that no one else will ever love you? that you can change him? that if you let yourself be angry for any reason, then suddenly you are as bad as him? no. you have to stand up. look yourself in the mirror. tell yourself the imagined version of him where you hope for a future together doesn’t exist. you love love, but you don’t love him. he…
/r/askFDS10/10/20 08:37 PM
14

Well then you risk the low cheap dates and low effort from LVMs. She can easily ask him if he hikes when on dates and share stories to find out if they both enjoy nature to the same degree.
/r/askFDS09/10/20 03:34 AM
17

I’d hold it off. yes it’s fun to do what you prefer most but then you can’t vet if you hand them a free pass for easy LV dates. Take yourself out on these walking dates. And like someone said, you aren’t safe on nature walking dates either. wait until you’ve vetted a HVM id say for atleast 10months- year for these types of dates. And wouldn’t you rather have fun on your own for these and not have them tainted by shitty dates with men anyways? Once you are married (assuming you want to be married…
/r/askFDS09/10/20 03:05 AM
30

Here are some resources that helped me in the past. The first 3 articles can be listened to Here is an article about not goving a fuck Here is an article about boundaries Here is an article about the rule of “Fuck yes or no” here is an article analyzing friendships- so you can be honest with yourself about what your relationship to a person is
/r/askFDS30/09/20 07:19 AM
4

you could report it saying “this breaks FDS rules” then put “other” and “this belonds in /r/AskFDS. I think you’re right though on mobile it doesn’t let you specify on why you’re reporting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 03:56 AM
6

I'd just ask her if she wants to pay 50/50 or not and let her know that you are comfortable paying for it if needed. Be careful of "friends" abusing this though. Since she invited you and she specifically said coffee and donuts, she probably chose that because she knows she can afford it. When I hangout with friends I pay for what I buy and they pay for what they buy that way no one has to worry. If I want something for both of us to have, I pay for it.
/r/askFDS29/09/20 11:30 PM
3

Happy birthday! the beach and the sunrise are sooo pretty
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 07:57 PM
5

Thank you for sharing, you've been through a lot. I want you to know that it is ok to cry. It's how you feel. And you feel alone and there's so much pain. And that's terrible that the surgeon changed your nose in a way that you didn't want. And it's sucky that your brother doesn't help around the house. And it's totally ok to feel angry and resentful at your mom to not put pressure on him while you are contributing and that she and your aunt aren't helping you yet helping him. You are valid. You…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 06:39 PM
9

<3 <3 <3
/r/askFDS27/09/20 03:56 PM
67

First please don't assume he's HVM until 6 months in. You can't tell until at least 6 months. Try dancing in front of a mirror naked. Spending more time with yourself alone, naked. Whether singing, just before a shower, doing self care, (not cooking because you could burn yourself). Know that you are working on making yourself happier and getting the body you want. Write down the things you do like about your body. Put those compliments and such in a place where you see them. If you've gotten lo…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 03:43 PM
7

First, read the handbook. Second- DELETE HIS NUMBER He makes you feel terrible, treats you so bad that he uses your insecurity against you? throw out the trash where it belongs. Third don't worry about how long it takes you to grieve the relationship. It hurts and takes time and over analyzing how quick/not quick you move on won't help. Fourth. I'm going to link you lots of advice I've given others because it sounds like you need lots of help. Also if you can afford therapy I'd invest in that to…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 03:33 PM
4

you can’t. you can’t help someone who doesn’t want help and who gets defensive and is in the cycle of abuse. All you can do is stay friends with them, set boundaries around them regarding them complaining about their relationship, and call out her abuser’s behavior. you can choose to sit down with her and show her all the terrible things one last time to see if she listens (after taking her out somewhere to make her feel happy) but after that you have to wait until she reaches out to you for sup…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 03:14 PM
11

Stop thinking about him. use the rage you have in anting him to have karma to fuel your spite to become a better person. But you can’t ever hope for him to regret breaking up/losing you as it may never happen. So what if he forgets you easily? Why does his memory of you value your worth? He’s not some special person. there are lots of people in this world. Normally I advise activities and such that you are doing already- new hobbies to add meaning to your life. instead of feelinf sad when thinki…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 03:08 PM
11

Yes. It does get better. And know that it's ok to still feel pain and have trouble moving on- you cared for someone and sometimes it's hard to move on. First, read or reread the handbook. Then, here are a couple different strategies to help along the way: block and delete his number so you don't get tempted to reach out to him if you haven't already Write out a list of all the things you didn't like about him. keep that up somewhere so that when you do think about him, you remind yourself of the…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 07:04 AM
40

Yeah I did thankfully thanks to another FDS thread
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 06:46 AM
9

First, to answer your question: It's not weird for a guy to ask out someone. I'm not sure what you mean as unethical. If a woman doesn't want to date a man who asks her out, she would reject him. She could inform him of your "a" scenario. I think yes you are overthinking. And it's weird for you to refer to people as male and female instead of men and women. If you like someone, if you are a guy, ask them out. Learn to accept rejection. If you are a girl, read the handbook- don't ask out guys. Wo…
/r/askFDS27/09/20 06:39 AM
16

Yes. It bothered me so much that it's an instant dealbreaker if someone doesn't ask questions. Another reason to add onto why OLD sucks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 11:14 PM
27

Please tell me you blocked him when you saw this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 11:11 PM
4

Thank you. This is really needed
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 10:45 PM
3

FDS does not support becoming "gf/bf". If you feel safe enough and that dinner at his house is a suitable date, then go for it. Personally I wouldn't, as it's implying sex. How long has it been since your first date? Does him not being able to pay for a date bother you? Things to keep in mind- know your standards and stick with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 10:24 PM
18

Honestly I disagree, you have to vet sex. Is he a good lover? Does he make you orgasm? I would rather do the 3 month rule and vet how well he does compared to the others I'm dating. He still waits, but also, I don't have to wait. I've dated guys who are terrible at sex and I'm glad I found out when I did. Of course, you can choose to wait until marriage. Depending on how old you are, people might not have the same values. But that's ok because you aren't compatible anyways. Then, if you do want …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 10:14 PM
37

So. Read the handbook if you haven’t already. then take out a piece of paper. spend 10 minutes writing down all of the things you like about yourself. moments that you are proud of. compliments you’ve gotten and given others. then on another piece of paper spend 10 minutes writing down insecurities. negative things you tell yourself or feel. then spend another 10 minutes challenging those beliefs you have about yourself- what if those aren’t true? For instance: im saving up money by living in th…
/r/askFDS26/09/20 09:17 PM
47

I think it's just being honest about how you feel with each reply you remembered this! That's amazing, this really means a lot If that is how you honestly feel in the moment, say it. Be true to your emotions. "Thank you" is sufficient in general- when you feel moved to say more, say so.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 08:15 PM
63

Him ghosting you is triggering an insecurity that you’re not good enough. You said it yourself- “why would he ghost me” you see, it’s ok. It doesn’t matter why he did. Take it as a sign that he’s not worth your time and energy. Read the handbook if you haven’t. It sounds like you don’t have an abundance mindset and have low self esteem. If he stops pursuing, you wouldn’t want him anyways. He didnt see your worth or was not high quality enough to keep pursuing. There will be other men.
/r/askFDS26/09/20 06:48 PM
23

Not having social media is not a red flag. You could ask him why he made that decision, to understand his character. If you look and find he has one and was lying, that’s a red flag.
/r/askFDS26/09/20 01:00 PM
81

I appreciate you taking time to explain how to vet asap when he approaches you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 03:58 PM
17

On top of that, if someone cared about you- wouldn't you want to have fun when on a date and not just go to a random coffee shop? Why not at least go to a fancy place or a fun unique activity so that you make a memory so if you do work out- you can always remember the amazing first date. Wouldn't he want to impress his partner?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 03:53 PM
5

true. I had a more complicated one with the right side as “being single or dating HVM” but liked the simplicity. You’re right though
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 11:07 AM
16

Yeah. If you can't respect someone's beliefs or have a conversation about it because they hate the other side so much, then you don't have empathy or want to understand. How would they respect their SO?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 01:14 AM
24

Do you love yourself? Because if you don't, deep deep down, if you have low self esteem, that might be causing you to slip back. It could be for numerous reasons. anxiety. desperation. wanting love. But that's not the important part. The important part for you is to KNOW YOUR WORTH. To know what YOU WANT. To know what you've been through and don't want to go through again. Remind yourself how you want to fall in love. How you want to life your live. Because it's hard. You meet a guy, and you see…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 01:01 AM
14

I like this idea even though I can’t participate
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 12:40 AM
31

you could do like 1 squat on the first day then +1 squat each day after. same with pushups. and when you can’t do them at the same time, just spread threm out in the day
/r/askFDS24/09/20 01:00 PM
67

Read the handbook. You blocked him, which is the necessary action. But you have to stop talking to the other "messengers". They are not "mutual friends". Why would you spend time with people who keep bringing up someone from your life who you stopped being friends with three years ago? Who was "downright cruel to you? Put your foot DOWN. Create boundaries. Block all of them and make new friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:48 AM
7

I LOVE YOUR VISION BOARD! It speaks to me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:05 AM
5

Like the other commenter said, after months of dating you should have formed a deeper relationship where people don’t need to vet as much and are more comfterble communicating as they know each other. Initially, texting should just be to set up a date or for conversation surrounding setting up the date. Conversations should not be over text so that you form a connection in person rather than random lettering on a screen. So then you can tell in person if the person is interested or not. So just …
/r/askFDS21/09/20 04:15 PM
7

like the other commenter said. dont say anything. just block and delete. if you want you can put up on your wall all the things you hate about him until you stop thinking about him so that you arent tempted to reach out after blocking. But sis you gotta move on. look in the mirror. See the sides of you that you like. the sides that you dont like. write a list of the type of person you want to become and do anything and everything you can to be that person. try new hobbies. go new places. take yo…
/r/askFDS21/09/20 03:58 PM
26

Yes, tell her to stop talking about it and complaining about him around you. You’re right, she needs to block him and set boundaries with him in person. But she isn’t listening either- so it’s best not to let her drain your energy. If she tries to keep talking about him, say you told her you won’t talk about that anymore then change the subject or physically walk away.
/r/askFDS21/09/20 11:44 AM
6

Yeah it’s tough. I understand, and I think it’s been good that you’ve been walking. I don’t know if you ski or snowboard, or snowshoe, but depending on where you live you could pick up those hobbies or ice skating to specifically help you cope with winter. Do you have a pet? it might be worth investing in one, even if it’s just a fish. Just some way to keep company. There’s stargazing if you’re into it. puzzles and embroidery. Also some places make ice castles but that might not be happening due…
/r/askFDS19/09/20 05:04 PM
8

what hobbies do you have? Do you ever take yourself on dates? How comfortable are you when being alone?
/r/askFDS19/09/20 03:29 PM
8

honestly, OLD sucks. you have to vet wayyyyyy more. Dating should be an effortless fun process, not having to weed through tons of men. Personally I am taking the coronavirus time to solely level up. Which would you rathter do: focus on leveling up (stressfree) or spend lots of time worrying about vetting random men you can’t see in person? I think it’s a waste of time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 01:25 AM
3

personally I’m going to get one of a dragon- ive thought about having it for 6 months but will wait a couple years to see if I still want it. I love dragons and they remind me of courageousness and ferocity and being true to yourself- commanding on your own. Beautiful. Awesome. Badass. one day...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 01:12 AM
3

You did the right thing. He disrespected you, made you feel shitty, and didn’t message you because he was “in a bad mood”. I am so proud of you for knowing your worth! Just want to let you know though about how FDS says to keep dating others so you’re not their gf and don’t invest so much when it’s only month 1. After that moment, I would have dumped him. Keep it up! you are not stupid. Keep loving yourself
/r/askFDS17/09/20 11:53 PM
11

Honestly I know someone who dated a guy who was in a similar situation, but technically he was living in his mom’s house. Either way, the person I know moved in with him while he lived with the mom. She disliked the mom a LOT. She had to fight tooth and nail to get him to move out and for them to buy a house of their own- because he was a momma’s boy. I don’t know what your BIL is like and what his mom is like, but I understand why they think he’s a loser. They probably assume he is a momma’s bo…
/r/askFDS17/09/20 11:09 PM
4

break up with him
/r/askFDS17/09/20 04:24 PM
27

yes this is grooming
/r/askFDS17/09/20 04:19 PM
10

oh my gosh. One of the people I dated, when breaking up, made “we” statements with him and his bro best friend “we decided it’s best to not continue the relationship”. what- was I fucking dating both of them? He only broke it off because I was going to break up with him first for being shitty and I called him out and told him my boundaries two days earlier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 12:38 AM
8

I hope you instantly blocked and deleted
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 08:00 PM
24

you can’t help people that do not want help, people who ask for help but don’t listen and make the same mistakes over and over, or people who can’t help themselves. id stop giving her advice if she asks for it. id stop giving her unsolicited advice. and if, this is a big if, if she does come to you for advice repeatedly- after 3 times, show her the fds handbook.
/r/askFDS16/09/20 02:11 AM
20

you’re not “wrong” for not wanting the marriage. Sit down for yourself and decide exactly what it would mean for you to be a “complete person by yourself”. What goals do you have? Make sure they are measurable, such as “I want to be making XX amount of money” or “I want to have my degree”. So then you can tell yourself- in Y years I will have accomplished my goals and I will be a complete person. Then I will think about considering marriage. So once you’ve laid out what you want and who you want…
/r/askFDS16/09/20 02:02 AM
2

it’s not embarrassing to talk about your boundaries. people can not read minds. if you are ashamed of talking about it, why? what would be so embarrassing?
/r/askFDS16/09/20 12:35 AM
1

Someone posted a similar post, but with the actual photos of the birds
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 12:10 AM
5

So. What you need to do is talk with her. you said you don’t want a relationship. Sit down with her and say, “(her name) I really enjoy our friendship and I want to make sure that we are on the same page. I see these actions (XYZ, like massages) as a nice part of being with you. I like them. And you said a while ago that we didn’t go on a date. But you paying for everything (or other actions of hers) make me feel like you might want more. So I want to be clear. I am not interested in having a re…
/r/askFDS15/09/20 11:39 PM
12

email them and say: “ Hi (Manager) I noticed a disrepancy in the time log/sheet/system. I worked X-Y days this time period during (hours this day, hours that day). But in the employee system it says (whatever is there). Can you fix this error? If not, who should I notify about this? Thanks, (Your name) “ also put on a calendar if you havent already of when you worked just so you have written proof of the hours you worked.
/r/askFDS15/09/20 06:58 PM
52

this video makes me so happy. QUEENS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 06:45 AM
145

Wow I can't believe she actually says "pick me"... this is a terrible example for women, I know so many people who love this show. I hope they don't follow her example.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:40 AM
9

literally block them and talk to them as little as possible. Avoid them
/r/askFDS15/09/20 02:36 AM
19

Like the other commenter said, you need to make sure you are not doing all the emotional and household labor on top of being the breadwinner. You also NEED to vet to make sure he will not be insecure from you earning more. Or not paying for dates because you earn more. Basically he has to treat you for what you are worth. If he isn't paying for the dates or other gifts, not helping out emotionally, and expects things to be "50/50" because you earn almost the same amount? You will be the one plan…
/r/askFDS15/09/20 02:34 AM
20

Personally I wouldn't go on a first date with anyone on my birthday. I think it's a bit weird if he wants to go on a first date on his birthday. Treat it like any other date- and you can text him your expectations if you feel uneasy. If he disagrees with your boundaries, then boom. block delete move on. Like the other commenter says, don't pay for the date. Keep with the FDS vetting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:26 AM
26

How long have you been going on dates with the guy for?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:19 AM
5

I like to do self care or workout. Face masks are my favorite. Blasting songs that cheer me up. Dancing and singing in front of a mirror. Also, what's huge is cleaning my room- somehow it makes me feel so much better and accomplished.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:09 AM
7

You have different options: direct, indirect, and hinting actions. Direct: have you had a conversation with her about this specifically? it’ll be a scary conversation to have but a worthy one. She may not listen but it’ll be the fastest way to tell her that you don’t think she derserves to be treated that way and that you want to boost her confidence. if she isnt receptive to change she also may resent you for bringing up that her relationship sucks indirect: having a convo asking her what makes…
/r/askFDS14/09/20 11:47 AM
3

Cutting off people is a necessary skill that takes practice, as we're trained from a young age to be "nice" by making sure people feel comfortable. Not starting conflict. Agreeable. Especially as women. It does feel anxiety inducting at first, like "oh no oh no uh oh". But I know that in time you will trust your own gut enough to stick to your boundaries. Trusting how you feel and acting on it. Yeah the struggle is real... but at the same time, the other person is making you feel so terrible, th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:27 AM
3

please report them if you haven't already
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:45 AM
13

I appreciate you trying to make a post about giving advice before dates but please read the handbook before posting. Try to video call with him before you go on a real life date. predate interview. keep it over phone, as it's hard to be objective with face-to-face interviewing Have his phone number. If he is late on the date you can call him. block and delete if he is late and move on NO sex until you are officially a couple. What is "officially a couple"?- you continue to date and refrain until…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:34 AM
30

Once you are married, you are legally bound, meaning that's when you give wife benefits like moving in together, having joint finances, etc. You're still single because you need to keep vetting and keeping your guard up. You're still single because you don't give wife benefits until you are legally married. You're still single because there's nothing binding or preventing you from breaking up tomorrow, no commitment. In FDS specifically you consider yourself single in that you continue to date u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:23 AM
3

please read the handbook- block and delete
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 11:19 PM
11

Thank you for making this change
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 07:09 PM
5

Honestly, part of me wonders: what is the source that makes you crumble when you do date? I think attacking that and figuring out why would help you. Are you happy with yourself, deep down? It sounds like you got suppper attached quickly. Maybe reflecting on what you did and what you want to do next time as well as making a game plan and hanging it up somewhere where you won't lose it will help. Do things that remind you of who you are so you know your worth no matter what happens. And hey, if y…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 12:39 AM
2

Why do you stay friends with these women if you just "use" them and could instead find friends you share interests with?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 10:10 PM
8

write a letter to him. write it allllll down. all of your feelings. all the things you could have said or done or stopped or would do if you saw him again. pour it all out. the good. the bad. the ugly. and when you’re done, throw the letter away. and when you feel the same emotions, because subconsciously they may still linger and show up in your dreams- become the better person in spite of what others have done to you. So when you do see them, if you do, you know that it’s their loss that you a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 04:00 PM
4

so insecurity stems from low self esteem. Do things that boost your self esteem so that you feel so valuable, pretty, and awesome that you know that even if he does look or leave, that’s his loss, and you deserve better. Because you are a QUEEN! if you have a critical inner voice that’s telling you he doesnt think your pretty or is looking at others because he wants to leave, silence that voice by challenging it with “what if I’m wrong?”. remember your favorite compliments, moments that you are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:50 PM
6

someone posted a similar question earlier, so here are some songs that I also posted on that thread: Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield Perfect Day - Legally Blonde Hoku Soak up the sun - Sheryl Crow Every day is a winding road - Sheryl Crow ABBA - Dancing Queen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:59 AM
4

Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield Perfect Day - Legally Blonde Hoku Soak up the sun - Sheryl Crow Every day is a winding road - Sheryl Crow Alice Merton - No Roots Dua lipa - Don’t start now (Robin Schulz - Sugar = favorite) We are Sex Bob-omb - Scott pilgrim vs the world ABBA - Dancing Queen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:56 AM
15

it’s hard to say. Depending on what you need help with and how good the counselor is, he could do the job. If you can afford it, there’s no harm in trying him as a therapist. If you don’t have the money, feel “yuck” or “no” when thinking about paying for his service, or are mentally stable enough to wait, then don’t pay for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:38 AM
99

At first I didnt realize what this meant but I found it disgousting when I did realize.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:35 AM
27

Yes. HVM will see your worth and rise up to meet it. One of my ex's who was LVM said the line "you're too good for me" and I should have broke up with him there and then. One time a guy and I were going on dates, but after 4 dates he said "you're too good for me" and broke it off, thankfully. He said he had a lot of mental issues going on and other stuff that he needed to address in himself. If they aren't ready to face themselves, they won't break it off. It's the same reason why my last ex and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 01:25 AM
272

Yeah, you don't see lesbians or bi people cat calling or hear stories about lesbians raping women. In fact, I hear from my bi friends that it's hard to know whether women are lesbian or bi because they're so subtle when flirting!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 09:42 PM
9

if he makes you feel “bananas” just block and delete. please read all of the handbook if you haven’t already. You deserve better than a conversation with someone who makes you feel crazy, and someone who obviously is so insecure that you went to harvard that he keeps bringing it up. Also congrats on graduating from there :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 03:41 AM
22

no. why waste your time? “practice” is not worth your energy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 11:29 PM
7

Wow you are living an awesome life and I am so proud of you! from a nursing student to a nurse, I’m so happy that you were able to travel and live where you wanted :) cheers to living your best life!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 11:05 PM
16

Definitely less stressful. It might seem “harsh” because that’s society’s perception of setting strong boundaries and sticking to them. In reality, you no longer let people walk over you and take you for granted. No need to worry about how people will behave because you set a standard and either they follow it or they aren’t in your life. If they aren’t making your life easier they aren’t worth time and energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 08:00 PM
4

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Please dump him, you deserve the world. Others gave excellent ideas, but I want to give you ideas for having a relaxing evening while emotionally recovering from a break up. Treat yourself! cheese plate. go to your local grocey and get some different cheeses. Smoked gouda, aged chedder, bree, you name it! grab some grapes or your favorite snacks. Then you can get takeout and watch your favorite movies. treat yourself to a fancy restaurant. that place you’ve always wanted to go? …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 07:49 PM
1

I needed to read this, this explains why my ex and I broke up to a T. Thank you for the analysis, I learned a lot
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 12:39 PM
2

Negative value man
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 01:13 PM
1

wouldn't you tell your best friend everything? why is it that what she is saying has no interest to you?
/r/seduction24/01/18 09:31 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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