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Numerous_Rush5227 Archive

View 7 posts and 167 comments by Numerous_Rush5227 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Idk if mine did but she was on drugs and at a weird location the last night she shared her location with me. Doesn’t matter and an afterthought on my progress shortly after. You never know but you at least know she isn’t on your team anymore. That’s all that matters. Dont make sense of something without reason.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/26 08:16 PM
1

It is bizarre because I’ve seen infidelity drive women to divorce far faster than abuse. Also, curious OP’s stbx friends are like. A lot of crabs in the bucket as well
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/26 08:11 PM
4

She’s gifted you an opportunity you understandably aren’t aware of right now. Immediately start working on personal logistics and turn on your logic side of your brain for scheduling your hours, days, and weeks. You will get through this and the days will become shorter and your emotions will cycle through intense grief. It’s not fun man, but this is your life, and she no longer wants to be a part of it. Same happened with me 8 months ago. Work through the pains of today to eventually see what y…
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/26 07:58 PM
1

Short term, you are correct men get the shit end of the stick immediately after due to social fallout since divorced women pass around their “truth.” However, after the lie travels twice around the world. The truth comes out and sets many of us here free or serves as closure from a painful relationship and its ending. Once the grief is processed, there is far more happiness living life with more finances, a peaceful home, and real friends.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/26 09:33 PM
1

Was going to mention this before I read your comment. IF this incident is true at all in the perspective of the husband, I’d take a wild guess this was made up by the spouse as a weird way to cope with cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/26 07:07 PM
3

Can’t and don’t care now to confirm if they were in her ear but their lifestyles spoke enough for her to never grow up either. They were and are partiers, and having a stable life and a family does not mix with that. That mixed with self hating leftists projecting their minuscule life problems drew her in as female groups almost always do. She was too scared to fulfill the commitments we “made,” for marriage. Life is much more peaceful now
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/26 03:08 PM
1

Nurses are such “empaths” aka narcissists
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/26 02:59 PM
1

Mine left her customer service job for data analyst program right before bailing on the marriage. $8k loan all hers for a position AI will most likely replace in 5 years.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/26 02:58 PM
3

Philosophically speaking, the justice system and society as a whole is and was intended to break the family and break husbands (men) in the process. There are a ton of complexities in the thick of it all but previous generations of men allowed for this to take place by bending the knee and not serving justice for the injustices brought upon by…the justice system. Our grandfathers and fathers sat back and allowed inch by inch for our government to take what is now miles past sanity. Women were al…
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/26 01:39 PM
3

She's blocked on everything, even email. She quit her job before taking a school loan for a field which AI will replace in 5 years. Too much free time I guess. Silver bullet dodged
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 06:04 PM
1

Amen to that as an older brother of two.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 04:59 PM
2

Appreciate the sounds advice. Fortunately, this post is coming after an update from my sister alone. Which means my sister didn't listen and continued in friendly contact with her. So, I'm not sitting here with emotional ammo provided to my ex. Learned and won't chance that again.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 04:32 PM
1

I think you’re missing a valuable characteristic of women: their strength is in numbers socially. Was I angry to not receive a single call from my ex in laws when reconciliation was still a possibility? Sure. Did I try reaching out to them at all during and after? No.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 04:21 PM
1

I didn’t want to write a novel explaining every detail. So, I left stuff out such as how my sisters and mom, like most women, have too much curiosity to withdraw contact without instruction. I told my sister to block her because that would eliminate future chances to tell me information I do not want nor need to hear
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 04:18 PM
2

Yeah, it’s making more sense as time passes. She also provided unprovoked update on his future plans. The one that confirmed my suspicions was her moving to another state next month. The same place I mentioned while married which she refused to move because “family.”
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 03:43 PM
3

She didn’t hold a good opinion of my sister either. Sounds unhealthy and funny to garner support from those you don’t even care about
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 03:37 PM
2

Well put
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 03:30 PM
2

Man, it hits a lot of us. It’s just gonna be trial and error which is just the natural way too + adjusting to another person/body. Contrary to hookup culture belief, don’t drink much at all and get your mind right personally. You’ll eventually detach from her mentally and physically. Last thing, failing to get it up a few times is far less taxing than a divorce. You will learn to not give a shit about a lot of useless opinions after handling this process.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/26 03:06 PM
3

Considering her supposed transparency. At best, this is a shit test to see if you’ll forgive her and stay together. Either way, leave and don’t look back.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/26 04:38 PM
1

It’s funny how the champagne taste fairs when the beer budget awaits on the other side. Glad you are no longer forcibly dealing with that financial disaster.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 09:39 PM
1

I was formally friends with a couple who posted on FB their journey as a team battling multiple miscarriages until they finally had their miracle child. 2 years later, drama ensues and a lie of theirs was sworn on the life of their child they were lucky to have. Social media is a legit cancer.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 08:04 PM
3

At the “wise” age of 74. Holy crap
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 07:59 PM
2

Depends on your legit role in her decision. Mine’s lack of effort and laziness was very much on par with her mother’s lifestyle without the money to support it. I didnt insanely expect her family to take my side but considering the Catholic background, I expected an influence to try resolution first.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 04:07 PM
3

What a blessing now for us both. Sorry to hear that but now I know you’re happier for it too
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 03:34 PM
4

Because admitting I don’t love you Is far less taxing on the female mind than admitting infidelity and wrongful choices. Let the snowball build down the hill of chaos baby
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 02:18 PM
6

It’s all the same psychology. 1) make a post which only shares one side of the story by default 2) use said post to garner opinions and sympathy from other women whom have no knowledge of your actual life and contextual evidence to hold a valid opinion 3) divorce, have your fun 4) invest in a new cat each 5 years single or remarry. Then, rinse 2nd husband and repeat 1-3.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 02:16 PM
2

It parallels the political climate too imo. If you can’t sympathize hard enough for the disenfranchised, join em!! Being single isn’t the joy women think it is. Ask my sisters and ask all of my female relatives…
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 02:12 PM
8

Wow and yup. I never got a call from my in laws I knew for a near decade. I could only imagine what they were told but I no longer care because the house is trash less and the money keeps growing
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 02:11 PM
16

They lie to themselves, to their friends, and lastly to you
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 11:04 AM
5

It’s blatant manipulation and a clear sign she doesn’t respect you and your marriage. Cut it off now and push this divorce on through. She sounds lovely
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/26 07:19 PM
5

Yep. My rent obviously doubled but somehow, someway my savings did as well
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/26 12:28 AM
3

Nothing ruined a vacation more than the easily avoidable, but we just must, tight itinerary. Sure, let’s spend each activity having to think about making it on time for the next activity halfway through each….activity.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/26 12:18 AM
2

Yep. Mine took the dog I cared for more and paid all of his expenses without a care. Then, felt it was absurd she move her belongings out of the house and requested I pay for her storage. Ignoring the ramifications of divorce is no valid excuse. Request denied.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 03:57 PM
2

Eh, to an extent. I grew up with an emotionally abusive father but it led to differences between myself and my younger sisters. They still hold onto it while I was forced to be their father figure early teens. I learned my ex did the exact same and left when I began to consistently hold her accountable for relationship responsibilities. Something her father lacked the balls to do in his own relationship. Not our problem anymore
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 03:54 PM
3

Jet fuel for the miserable for sure
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 03:48 PM
3

This. I saw her as her mother after the flip. In hindsight, I should’ve known. Better late than never
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 03:02 AM
3

I can attest plenty of “out with friend(s),” is speak for something else but that’s from what I’ve seen
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 03:50 PM
7

Watch as they do, not as they say.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 01:37 PM
3

Starting to see more miserable hags try and invade this sub recently. Nothing but projection from daddy and/or the unresolved emotions from their own failed relationships. Enlightening to say the least.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 01:35 PM
2

She’s just a miserable divorcee spewing the same shit she told her ex
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 02:34 PM
3

There’s a difference between wanting to be married and wanting to be alone. She clearly doesn’t want to be married but do not conflate that with the wanting to be alone. Most of us on this page are well aware in hindsight many women are not wanting the responsibilities of marriage but dive right into marriage for the romance. Typical behavior to use studies for your own self validation. Fuck off
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 02:18 PM
3

It’ll take time to realize your opinions now were your wants holding on one last time to 12 years together. She isn’t possibly texting/talking to someone on the phone but she sure as hell doing so in person away from you or craving it once you’re at your mom’s. Kick her to the curb and do not leave the house.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 01:44 PM
1

Yep. Let her be alone but don’t move your life around for it.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 01:41 PM
5

No woman wants to be alone. She is purposefully pushing you away to get what she craves, and it’s no longer marriage. Let her live a life of impulse and feelings while you grow a better, new one for yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 01:40 PM
1

Princess mentality man. All these little girls wanting queen treatment but not the responsibilities.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 01:38 PM
1

Clean your gut because she does not sound worthy at all of flowers in the slightest with her limiting time with the kiddo. Glad you’re at least away from her dude. Best of luck
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 11:15 AM
2

The architect of her own demise and a victim forevermore. Gold
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 11:11 AM
5

Yeah man. Strongly believe one of my sisters has it. I do not wish a woman with BPD on my worst enemies
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 02:14 AM
5

At least the BPD showed in 6 weeks. Damn man
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 01:51 AM
1

She has you by her finger man. Whether it’s your language justifying a brat deserving to be happy or the sheer emotion behind this post. It sucks dude but not as much as it seems like living with her sucks. Time to file was years ago it seems.
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 06:44 PM
2

You’re so busy relying on her to break you. Why double down and break yourself more? Get up, give your head a shake, and make a life for yourself. It’s more difficult when separated than after it’s final, but you are the king of your domain. Respect yourself as such.
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 11:31 AM
5

This. Therapy isn’t for everyone but it sounds beneficial for those angry years after the divorce. Fortunately, I was already in personal (couples was and is useless imo) therapy before and during mine. 2-3 months after she left, my anger channeled into appreciation for life without her. Forgive but never forget.
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 11:27 AM
3

Sounds like you’ll at least be able to enjoy your life without her lies and nagging. Try your best to rationalize a better life for yourself than try and make sense of a mad woman.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 08:19 PM
6

She took and is actively taking you for granted. You are only a face to talk to for her convenience. Cut it loose
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 01:55 PM
4

No point in dragging ass into therapy when she’s wanting dirty dick in an apartment elsewhere. Time to stand tall and move on. Edit: if my opinion is worth anything, I’d say she’s using this arrogantly for her expected validation from a therapist to move out and have her “glow up.”
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 03:09 PM
3

No kids. So, nope. I was lucky
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 02:52 AM
2

How demeaning. Happy she’s no longer around to mess with your head.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/26 02:42 PM
20

I grew up with two younger sisters and an enabling mother. If there is anything I learned from them, my ex, and my ex’s miserable friends it’s a woman’s propensity to conveniently lie to themselves and one another to survive personally and socially. Once you realize and accept this, you’ll learn to detach from your ex’s validation and move on to a better life.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/26 06:42 AM
1

Best of luck man
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/26 06:23 AM
3

Great post man. Took about a week to realize my body embraced the newfound peace but my mind took on the stages of grief. She’s been gone 5 months now and I am on a sales heater for a 4th consecutive month in a row and hitting the gym again. It’s beautiful
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 08:35 PM
2

Yep. Mine said we’re gtg once our therapist began to hone in on her. 3 years later, she leaves me after I outgrew her from personal therapy. Trash taken out effortlessly
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 06:22 PM
1

They’re hive minded. So, why think you’re sitting pretty in a room outnumbered? Over before it starts.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 06:19 PM
1

Yeah anyone willing to bring others into their web of lies deserves a life of peril
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 06:18 PM
3

If you were thorough and brought up valid reasons, why tf would she say that to you? JFC
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 04:21 PM
3

This is what parents mean when they tell us as kids life isn’t fair. Just ignore and don’t lash out. Move on
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 01:40 PM
1

Voice lessons and the gym. I am quite sure you will do well on the dating market.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 03:24 PM
2

You’re gonna feel different possibly later today, this week, or next month. However, keep tabs on the relief and peace. Figure out why and hammer that in your currently fragile head space. Do not stop your progress without her.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 01:27 PM
4

Your persona was molded by her through your attachment. Bonds strengthen over time especially for men which explains the deep pain. It’s time to get to know yourself. I recommend actively writing in a personal journal. You will get to know yourself and consequently what and why your relationship didn’t last. You’d be surprised to find out a lot of it was not your own fault.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 01:24 PM
5

Not only is blood thicker than water, most step parents marry into the baggage and years of manipulation already done to your spouse’s children. If mom has the kids still, you think they’re going to respect their step dad any more than the actual father their mom most likely has casted a negative image about on her children?
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 06:34 PM
3

JFC that last line man. Mine would stand in front of the door when I’d excuse myself to collect my emotions. You could imagine what passed through my now enraged mind during those times.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 05:04 PM
2

I had to fix that but it came with a lot of self improvement and standing up for myself when I lost fake friends along the way. Most importantly: you cannot rely on the “right person” to fix being a people pleaser. It’s contradictory in its definition.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 05:02 PM
1

Great perspective. Find out what it was that allowed you to deal with all of the negatives. Mine was people pleasing too much where boundaries weren’t set and you really can’t go backwards which I realized once I started personal therapy half a year prior to her exit. Current GF respects my personal time and helps around the house when she’s over. It’s amazing how that works
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 03:45 PM
1

Ironically too once you’ve sat down and had quite a bit of self reflection. You will start to recognize logically what she didn’t fulfill for you without the emotional overload.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 03:40 PM
2

Awesome read and great wisdom to share. Same timeline and similar situation for myself. The more I’ve dug in to work on my imperfections, the more I’ve realized many of the issues in my marriage were not solely my fault. Glad you’re in a better spot now too after going through your own hell.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 01:12 PM
15

Years back my ex and I did couples therapy. Most was “fixing” me and she coincidentally ask we stopped going when it was time to talk over her shortcomings. Peaceful times today without that mental midget.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 11:31 AM
6

Together 10 years married 3. Didn’t receive a single phone call from an in-law and only her cousin texted me. In hindsight, the women had those pussy husbands in check and their daughter followed suit and I never folded. Fuck em
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 08:33 PM
1

No children. So, it appears all she has left is the new life she’s created in a blender of chaos. Nty anymore
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/26 06:20 PM
2

Just as we lose disloyal friends during divorce fallout, you’re admitting guilt of doing the same. You and a lot of us here lost ourselves along the way trying to appease a spouse who didn’t care for us at all. The price we pay sometimes man. Time for new friends
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/26 04:00 AM
1

Their relationship wasn’t at a point which would outlast my sister’s loyalty to me. I forgot I didn’t have her blocked on LinkedIn when I logged back in to add some folks. She’s still jobless and at home with her parents. It appears she’s probably looking to see if my divorce life’s turned for the worse too in an ill attempt to validate her leaving. I’ve hit 3 straight record sales months and lost 30 lbs on my path back to my best shape. However much I’d love her to know, she doesn’t deserve a s…
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/26 12:19 AM
3

My sister rightfully brought it up to me but I had to pry out all of the information. Which is telling in its own right my sister feels odd my ex is trying to meet up now. I think it’s a weak attempt to try and find out about my life since there is no other avenue after I’ve cut ties along the way with folks who pussyfooted loyalty. I’ll most likely tell my sister to block her and be done with it to avoid a slowdown to my progress so far.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 11:18 PM
2

She helped give you a wake up call brother. Comes with the valid emotions. Now, we heal and progress.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:35 PM
2

Perspective dude. Idk your cause for divorce but now I’ve forgiven her but will never forget the negatives she brought and maintained in my life. Let go of what is no longer existent.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:33 PM
2

Yikes. Sounds like the self fulfilled prophecy type. Keep running
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:31 PM
1

Time well spent heals all wounds man. Losing the house is one item on a large list of inconveniences which still won’t equate to the inconvenience of staying with a woman like your ex by the sounds of it. Keep working on yourself and you’ll eventually come across someone who’ll help build a legit home for you both. Won’t be easy but nothing of ease is of worth. You know that already. God speed
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:29 PM
1

Fair
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 01:56 PM
1

Stay strong man. Sell it so it’s not sitting around reminding you of potential hope if you’re prone to that as I am. Helped expedite my process.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 01:55 PM
1

Sell it at gold value on Facebook marketplace. Weight it and use a calculator online. Not life changing money but the more the merrier
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 01:54 PM
1

Good on you. Took me a week but I knew the instant relief without her. Helped expedite the process moving on.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 01:52 PM
1

I sold mine for its full gold value off Facebook marketplace within a week after she called from her parents. She decided a week of separation and sobriety from her alcoholism was a okay to make a life decision. So, I knew within a week to not waste my time/life with someone who doesn’t have her shit together.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 01:51 PM
2

No, it’s *excellent there. The fresh feelings suck man but I too was blessed with this blindside without children. You will have a lot of time to heal from it even if it’s a catch 22 forcing also a higher chance of boredom = negative thoughts. I’m 4 months away now and the first month really sucked. Together nearly 11 years, married 3. It gets much better bro
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/26 03:14 PM
1

Try a bunch of tasks/interests and stick with the ones which make you excited and/or lost in the sauce. I.e. sports, musical instruments, fixing cars, hiking, Microsoft excel (personally became obsessed after immediately making a 2 year budget), etc. Personally, sheer laziness towards the end of my marriage reminded me how anxious being content. Find your passions
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 10:27 PM
1

Let her stay in her feelings, not you. Move on, progress, and leave your old self behind.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 07:29 PM
2

First month is a huge bitch but an opportunity to either sulk like a folding bitch or move on for the better. A lot of hurt from women a lot of us in hindsight should’ve never married to begin with.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 07:28 PM
2

Can attest about 4 months (1 brutal first month) since she left and my God is my life 5x better than before she left. Making more, in better shape, and I have peace. Doesn’t seem so now but peaceful life has a humble beginning.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 06:35 PM
3

Not a real hot take. Princess treatment has been a thing for nearly 75 years in this US. A lot of dads raising baby girls instead of eventual women. The internet just expedited it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 06:27 PM
2

Stay away from screens and go on a long, nice walk a couple hours before bed. I greeted each person who walked past me between the negative thoughts grinding through my head. I cried myself to sleep for a couple good weeks, but I found out a lot about myself and my worth. Hope you find the same sooner than later too
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 06:23 PM
1

Start by changing your words. I/me allow her to live rent free in my head. You accepted this by stating, “‘I’ grieve.” Accept the inevitable because she sure isn’t acting out that way with another man to fill her miserable void. Get to know yourself through your grief because holding on is far worse.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/26 12:52 PM
5

Sounds like your typical female jargon imo. The same type of crap I’d sit back and watch my ex talk with her friends when they had break ups. All a matter of making each other feel better than actually tackling problems to fix. It will never make sense to me, but not my problem anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/26 11:42 PM
7

Trial and error dude. All of us are here we’re out of the game for a large amount of time when we came back. Dive, do not pussyfoot, your way back in. Women have a keen sense of this and you’ll do yourself a disservice. Godspeed
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/26 11:21 PM
1

What’s the main reason?
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/26 01:49 PM
1

Get a DNA test to clear it all up
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 11:49 AM
3

Your question seems loaded as if you’re implying a significant portion of us on this page will approach another marriage again with even more effort than a lot of us already exhausted in our previously failed marriages. No, many of us invested too much into ungrateful partners to double down the next hand.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 08:15 PM
3

Yes, give her what she tells you and she’ll quickly realize you aren’t fucking around. Took me 2 weeks of divorce purgatory to realize this while she was pampered at home by her parents. She soon lost her cool asking for storage funds immediately after I gave an ultimatum and forced her to move her stuff out. Your feelings right now are the attachment to her. She doesn’t care about you and that sucks. However, she is no longer your partner as she asked for it. Treat her as such and you’ll expedi…
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 06:33 PM
3

To each its own. I was in therapy 6 months or so prior to her bailing. Then, now in a new relationship 3-4 months after. Personally, the timeline’s worked well for me since I was well prepared to handle everything at the end of last year. All depends on the work you’ve put in prior because those emotions I felt from my ex’s treatment is not deserving to place on the innocent.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 01:54 PM
3

Just to be clear, you are 100% she’s pregnant with YOUR child? If not, I’d say you’re sitting on some heavy leverage.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 01:50 PM
1

Sorry you’re having to go through this but these are the moments I remember when I recognize the happiness I now have without that draining leech. You’re in Hell. So, keep moving forward out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 01:46 PM
1

Great wisdom. Fortunately, I learned this in my previous several months on my own but I didn’t have children involved. I’d imagine this one resonates quite well with those unfortunate to have their little ones involved.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 01:42 PM
1

You’ve made and are making strides which will far outlast the short term benefit of her weight journey. At least you don’t have to deal with her selfishness and nagging anymore while you enjoy the perks and money of the new job
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 07:33 PM
1

31yo here can attest. It’s a gift seldom given especially no children involved. Best of luck, OP. She’s gonna need it far more than you lol
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 06:42 PM
2

Yeah, she sounds like a classic case of BPD. Leave her, stay in the house, and get you some peace of mind
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 06:41 PM
1

Self fulfilled prophecies are worth leaving to just their self …
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 06:06 PM
1

I hope you learned a valuable lesson(s). Holy crap man happy you’re away from all of that and poised to never touch that filth again
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 02:47 PM
6

“Reconnecting with single friends and staying out late.” The crabs pulled another into the bucket of despair, brother. Leave and run fast
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 01:11 PM
4

You miss the idea of her man. I get the emotions, but you need to get off your ass for HER actions. No one in this world did or will give a shit. You have yourself and that is good enough. You just aren’t aware of this, but you are alive and today is the first day of the rest of your life. Get busy and stay busy. Best of luck dude
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 04:31 AM
1

Welp, you got me. Way to be a twat about it. Good luck Bruv
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 12:28 AM
1

I am answering for marriages in which the couple (no previous children if previously married) is expected to have children, but do not within 2 years. It’s safe to assume a marriage with children stays safe if both partners are wise and loving enough to recognize the children are living examples of their love.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 08:21 PM
4

It’s a catch 22 here. You don’t have others to serve as a distraction, but you are going to appreciate dealing with the fallout far faster than many others. Get to know yourself very well. You are your best friend in this life. You lose yourself, you have nothing man. Best of luck!! Edit: also, get a nice pen and pad to write. That and exercise will make things much easier sooner than later.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 08:15 PM
0

Speaking from both my own experience and seeing other divorces, most marriages in which kids aren’t on the way within 1-2 years dissolve.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 08:12 PM
1

Wanted to pick yalls brains and talk over it. Not that it’s something I’m currently wasting time with in my life.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 08:11 PM
1

Daddy issues and all. I’d imagine the complex really fits this dilemma when the girl wants you to be the redemption story. However, that requires redemption for past wrongs we didn’t do. Starting from 10 spaces back nty
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 08:10 PM
1

This. She saw you were better and wanted a way to bring you down. Move on from this trash
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 05:40 PM
2

It gets us all at times man
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 04:13 PM
2

All younger but I’m not willing to try anymore of the Gen Z cusp. They all love an “older” man, go figure. I’ve had a couple dates/hookups with some and there is only phone time, no good conversation. I am also not going to waste time with women in their 30s, especially in Austin where I live.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 04:12 PM
2

For sure man. Plus, time tells all and I’ve noticed this with my own parents. Your daughter already notices it, and I’d imagine your son too which will only grow over the years while momma is living in her own misery.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 01:34 AM
1

Fair. I guess I’ve ignored the glaring signs from my own two little sisters…
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 01:32 AM
1

The even keeled deserve fewer storms they can control. Good on you for realizing it. I'd say immediately, think of your children when times are tough. I'm sure it helped hearing your daughter's unconditional support when you bravely brought up divorce. Control what you can and remember the negatives exist, but you do not have to focus on them.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 06:57 PM
3

You are awfully lucky to be this stupid and not stuck with her again. Block her on everything. Thank all of us now and later.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 06:51 PM
4

She likes clubbing is all I needed to read. Good on you
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 06:49 PM
1

Yes. Just make it a discovery call. You'll get to realize the predatory nature some spouses exhibit once a marriage is headed towards divorce. Take the emotion out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 06:46 PM
1

For sure. My post was meant as an observation since I haven’t jumped back into anything serious. A lot of red flags waving high even well before a first date
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 05:32 PM
1

Gotcha. Yeah, also playing entertainer is one hell of a terrible time. Agreed on decent jobs for dating prospects. Although it opens things up to the boss babe types. Hard to find a balance out here
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 05:24 PM
1

Curious if you’ve casually dated or also been exclusive. Either way, lucky you.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 05:20 PM
1

I’d lawyer up considering you have far more to lose
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 05:17 PM
1

A domestic violence and family addiction doctor once told me, “while it’s well known alcohol can destroy relationships and households, no one ever talks about how some spouses would make almost all of us rely on the bottle to get through each day with ‘them’.” Not to ruin you reminiscing, but have you ever thought of why you’re sober now without her and became a drunk twice with her?
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 04:31 PM
2

lol my first date back in the field was with this arrogant 5/10 (admit I wasn’t going for gold to shake off the rust). Talked about her past boyfriends being abusive stalkers only to say she didn’t feel a connection with me. I took the compliment haha
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 04:19 PM
1

Gladly give your relative a quick head shake and tell em to pound salt
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 04:15 PM
2

True morality is talking yourself out of the evil you’re capable of. It’s the life we live as noble men. Keep being there for your son. He knows now and will later understand the love and pain in dedication. I know you’re venting, but your son appreciates what you do even when you know you don’t wanna do it sometimes. He’ll be the same for his children too because of you.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 04:10 PM
6

I wouldn’t stay in the house for an argument in order to collect my thoughts after a 10-15min walk in attempt to avoid harsh words said in the heat of the moment. She proceeded to stand in the doorway multiple times because my fault
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 02:11 AM
3

Sorry man. At least this is worth swallowing compared to a married guy’s wad in an empty parking lot.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 02:08 AM
3

Met many of these types at house parties and get togethers. Most boring people never shut up
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 02:05 AM
5

No shit x1000. Took me a course of a week to finally delete mine. 30-35k texts man. The number gave me false hope until I realized that much history to be ignored for temporary discomfort is no companion worthy of keeping around.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/26 08:21 PM
2

Eh, don’t lie to yourself. If you were treated well. Then, the sex would’ve come with it, brother.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/26 08:19 PM
2

Forgive yourself and move along man.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/26 02:46 AM
6

From experience, any woman not willing to even forcibly pay for a couple bottles of wine at the store or convenient store stop isn’t worth pursuing. Most of us here already experienced a temporary (speaking just from childless divorce) decline in finances. I’m not trying to expense out my financial security for an ungrateful woman anymore. Sue me haha
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/26 08:53 PM
1

We learn and take in from our actions and routines. If you aren’t fulfilling your physical needs or keeping a healthy lifestyle, you will notice it subconsciously
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 12:02 AM
2

Tik tok rot sure doesn’t help people’s anxiety. Glad you no longer have that in your life. Best of luck mate
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 01:33 PM
2

I recommend writing down your thoughts as you go through emotions in the day. Write down what comes to mind when thinking about putting down the alcohol and weed. Then, see what may be influencing you to hold onto gambling, and fill the addictive void with something truly beneficial for yourself. Exercise, charity, volunteerism, etc. I.e. I exercise like a mad man and I am going to walk across the street today to offer to mow my neighbors yard. I was previously judgmental of their “laziness,” bu…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 01:23 PM
1

Holy shit I’m happy you came to your senses
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 07:41 AM
1

Yeah, same page on the Texas law. TBH though, I will refrain from wanting to just piss her off if it means excessive finances and time. I already know she’s going to be a huge wreck and realize it with no 2nd chance from me.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 06:54 AM
1

Appreciate it
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 03:31 PM
1

Figured it was the case. So, posted this to get yalls insight before doing something I thought was an emotional trap. Thanks
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 03:30 PM
1

This was just a post about IF I should so I could field insight like your reply. I am most likely not giving into this since I’d imagine she’s most likely using as potential leverage to open things up. My mind’s had a lot of clarity over the past few months, and my this post is an example of me asking advice instead of giving into unnecessary costs emotionally blind.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 03:28 PM
2

Nicely put man. I hope the anger continues to wane for you, but I know the same reason you are angry is the same thing motivating a better you each day. 3 months for me and my life’s already changed for the better. Just channeling the pain into progress.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 01:21 PM
5

Wasn’t hard to say ex wife or soon to be ex. It was catching myself saying our/we instead of my/I. I considered us inseverable until the day it finally hit me. Then, never said we again.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 01:09 PM
1

Dude, I and I’m sure some others have a list of multiple instances where I am guilty of emotional unloading during high stress patches in my previous marriage. Some probably from the mistakes and impatience of our previous partners, but something we have to live with and have the privilege to learn from. She doesn’t want you anymore and it sucks. However, she doesn’t love you and you deserve time to learn to love yourself and grow. Idk if you’re religious, but either way, these bleak trials we e…
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/26 03:36 PM
6

She is 100% banking on your reaction to it man. I've gone through the ringer as has everyone else here. How you react in this world has far more pull than what is falsely said about you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 07:43 PM
4

Invest in your hobbies and make friends along the way. Boredom kills. Especially during separation and a divorce. Find peace with yourself most importantly. Best of luck man. Embrace the emotions and allow them to help find yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 07:31 PM
3

Which I since have after the initial shock. Part of it all was my large expectations of finally something normal again for me to experience with my old friends from college, but oh well. Is what it is. Been doing very well besides this blindside
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 01:57 AM
5

This is my friend of 11+ years and my friend before my ex and I originally met. His fiancé is a friend my ex made 7 or so years back at work.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 08:30 PM
2

It's a shit feeling, but support here and with legit friends same city, it's been better than I originally felt. Just natural wounds reopening as opportunities present themselves.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 08:04 PM
9

Yes, ex will be there. There was no problem I was aware of until I got his text today. The bride is just anxiety ridden anyway, and he's ironically setting a bad precedence for his own marriage from the get-go. Fuck em
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 07:58 PM
5

Thanks dude. I've already made some friends at the gym after getting back to it. Just a real shocker reopening wounds, but it's another blessing in disguise.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 07:20 PM
1

Yep. Most of the people in our “tight” circle in town jumped ship. However, I’ve cried after many beautiful phone calls with my closest friends from college 100s of miles away. Quality over quantity any day.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/26 03:45 AM
1

After some time to think over, I appreciate and love the time we experienced together. However, I can really appreciate she showed me love was indeed conditional. Once I was coming out of down times working myself to death for better finances and healthier house life, she left and treated divorce like a high school break up. Get to know yourself and your self worth is my lesson. It’s been awfully peaceful after a couple months of agony. Stronger friendships and the rejections of dating aren’t sh…
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 02:43 PM
1

Sorry about all of this man. In my opinion, I understand the our money argument. However, there is a glaring contradiction to pocketing a tax credit solely reliant on your partner’s children from a previous marriage. This would be strange too if it were a portion of your salary deposited to an account you do not have access to. I’d start to shed this person from your life now. From your side, it appears his job preference and financial decisions with you money are examples of someone living with…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/26 05:08 PM
1

Thank you for the advice. I won't find myself in a relationship for a good while or at least until I've worked on my lessons learned if finding a legit fit as partner. If anything, the attachment may be the most difficult to work through. However, I am learning life is much more peaceful and less taxing without her plate piling onto mine.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 08:03 PM
1

Appreciate your wisdom. I've grown closer to an already good-sized friend group and we've gotten closer over the past month. It's attachment more than anything and the insecurities stemming from sex and bond. I've accepted it will take however long it takes, but that I'm now I am still driving the car, but peacefully alone.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 08:01 PM
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