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Ok-Koala-214 Archive

View 10 posts and 23 comments by Ok-Koala-214 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Get a hobby, try something new. It was golf for me, I used to hate golf, now it has become a real passion of mine. It's something I focus on to try and get better, I go to the range multiple times a week to practice, I take lessons, it gets me out of the house into the sunshine. Its an excuse my married friends can use to hang out on the weekends. There is something positive mentally, about seeing improvement in something you care about gradually over time. And when you eventually meet someone, …
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/23 02:03 PM
2

That’s a tough username
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 10:51 AM
1

Homie you gotta live with the chance of life that earth gives you Tattoo it on my wrist dawg! Praise the lord!
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 03:06 AM
1

Nope, you explained perfectly. Just wanted more details. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/23 01:05 AM
1

What do you mean several thousand in equity?
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 11:30 PM
3

I've never really considered a mens group. That could be helpful, I wonder if people on here have had positive experiences with them?
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 01:18 AM
2

Appreciate the encouragement dude.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 01:16 AM
2

Hang in there bro. Your in my thoughts today.
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/23 12:20 PM
1

Congratulations sir. Keep killing it.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 01:57 PM
2

Thank you again. I have added those to my list. "once they recognize they have lost control of their partner a whole new level of aggression and abuse arises" That really just hit me square in the chest. I have been so worried about the hurt she is feeling and the way her life will change without me. There could possibly be a moment where she realizes exactly the loss she is going to experience and lashes out in desperation.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 03:49 PM
2

Thank you so much, just so I am clear, the two books you recommend are: Stop Care Taking the Borderline or Narcissist Stop Walking on Eggshells, 3rd Ed. And "180" and "Grey Rock" are practices, covered in these books, to handle people who are exhibiting that personality type? I've seen so many post about using security cameras to record interactions, I really hope it does not get to that point, but thank you for the advice. We have no children, we haven't even been married that long, I really ho…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 03:15 PM
2

Im so sorry, you have experienced so much loss in such a short period of time, I cannot imagine the pain, I obviously do not know your wife but I know that it had to be extremely hard for her as well, it can be really difficult to put yourself aside to care for someone else. You have so much on your plate, that responsibility coupled with all the grief you must be dealing with really has the cards stacked against you and your marriage. Life certainly is not fair, I hope you and your wife can rea…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 05:41 AM
2

I appreciate that a lot. I feel so sorry for all the men in this sub who cannot control their anger, because I was one of them. Therapy helped me identify my triggers and how handle that emotion. It may not save my marriage but being in control of my behavior has been so rewarding. Not to mention, never being accused of being "out of control" has been such a great experience, also rendering a major weapon in her arsenal ineffective.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 05:32 AM
3

Maybe I am telling you something you already know, but therapy dude! Don't let other people control you. I've never put my hands on my wife, but in the early days she would press my buttons to try and get a rise out of me. Then when I took about all I could take, I would lose my cool, stomp around and say things I didn't mean, then it was "look at the big bad guy! He's out of control" it was like poking a bear in a cage. I went to therapy, learned my triggers, learned how to handle my emotions, …
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 09:46 PM
2

Yeah I know I'm not a narcissist, like by definition alone I'm not. It's just one of those things where I've be called one so many times, anytime I catch myself feeing hopeful or good/proud of myself, there is a little voice that like "You sure are full of yourself". The dating stuff with you ex is brutal man, I'm so sorry you had to experience that. You know it is an attempt to hurt you right? I know seeing her with another man (or just the idea of it) is going to rock me to my core, but that's…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 09:00 PM
2

You love her man. Unrequited love is one of the hardest things to experience. It makes us question our worth or value. There is nothing wrong with you, many people feel the same way. I'm no expert, but I don't think there is anything you can do. Know you don't have a time machine, you cannot change the past. If there's something you did in the past that cost you your marriage, then you got to take it as a lesson learned. Though it is very hard for me to believe that one person is ever at fault, …
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 08:49 PM
3

My wife used to love my family, my father adored her, we would all vacation together. We never vacationed with her family because of her relationship to her mom, dad, or sister, whoever she was currently fighting with. I love her family, and losing them as a family is going to be difficult. My father passed away in April, since his death she has had a weird jealousy/resentment of my mother. I can admit, through the grief process I have given extra attention to my mother, caring for her and somet…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 08:37 PM
-1

The marriage cannot be saved. It might could be band-aid'd and we'll have a short time of happiness, but it always returns to here. And I'm ready to step off the marry go round. We attended couples therapy about 5 years ago, it was unhelpful, the therapist's conclusion was basically we both were being immature. We often fought after the sessions because the therapist would spend the majority of the time trying to change my wife perspective of our conflict, and my wife would accuse me of lying. I…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 07:33 PM
5

I don't think I am a narcissist, though my wife swears that I am. I think the pain I feel by seeing her hurt, in fact, by definition makes me unable to be a narcissist. It makes me feel guilty, because I know my future has so much potential, that my marriage is only the pillar of my life that I am unhappy with (I love my career, I love my friends, I love my hobbies, walking into the door every evening is the single worst part of my day). She can destroy me finically, but it's ok, I know I can re…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 07:08 PM
2

My man, appreciate it.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/23 06:43 PM
2

Damn man, how kind of you. I really appreciate it. The emailing is a good idea, I can see the twisting of words coming, its already to the point where simple miscommunications or plain absent mindedness on my part, to her is some maniacal action to hurt her. A local attorney is great idea, at the very least that less billable for the travel! Thanks for the wisdom.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 03:41 AM
1

Our finances are already separate, we have a joint account that we each deposit in to pay the mortgage/bills, direct deposits go into our own personal accounts. Our companies pay each our phone bills. That's good advice about the bargaining chips and moving valuables. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 02:49 AM
1

US, in Georgia.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 02:43 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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