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PenneyPence Archive

View 3 posts and 177 comments by PenneyPence on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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17

You don’t want to talk to them. You don’t want to hang out with them. Patriarchal programming has you believing that doing what you want and not doing what you don’t want is being a “bitch”. This is a lie that you no longer need to believe. You don’t have to give them reasons because the fact that you don’t want to is all that matters. Ignore. Block and delete. Grey rock. Do what YOU want. Fuck the patriarchy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/22 02:05 AM
29

Instead of characterizing male traits as good or bad, change the focus to “what I want” and “what doesn’t match what I want.” It takes the focus off him and onto you. Good or bad thinking means he has to be a horrible human for you to leave. That’s what makes us stay too long because “he’s not a bad guy.” It’s very externally focused. When we turn the focus internally to what we want and whether it matches the other person, the choice to leave is a lot easier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 06:47 PM
443

The male need to convince is so interesting because I hate good morning texts and I remember telling a guy and he huffed and puffed and told me that I should like them and that he was going to send them anyway. Ok… so as soon as he did it I blocked and deleted. A “good enough reason” to end things is because you want to. The end. Good for you for walking away and don’t beat yourself up for not doing it immediately. We know the rules, but we’re not robots.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/22 10:57 PM
41

The feminist podcast Unfuck Your Brain is a great listen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 10:29 AM
118

Even pre-FDS, if a guy asked if he could give me his number I’d say, “I don’t call men, they call me.” It doesn’t even make sense. If you’re at a business networking event, do you say to someone that you want to do business with, here’s my card, call me if you want to do business? No you get their contact information and you contact them. I find exchanging numbers and the guy calling first to make the most sense. The guy you mentioned prefers a passive method and he’ll likely show up passive thr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 07:39 PM
6

The problem isn’t that his dad cheated. The problem is that it sounds like he is using it to trauma bond with you. Most negative stories told in the early stages of dating are often foreshadowing what’s going to happen to you. And if you have to come to Reddit to ask, the answer is leave 99% of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 12:14 PM
5

Things may seem nice with a guy, but you don’t get a glimpse into what a future will look like until they experience a death in the family. Most humans need time to grieve but don’t completely cut people off. If someone is still ignoring you after several weeks that tells you that they either don’t have the emotional intelligence to date and experience loss OR they are grieving with their main partner/gf/spouse. Either way, you did the right thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 06:09 PM
7

Thank you. You summarized it better than I could!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 02:44 AM
3

Review the sub rules. No personally identifying information allowed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 12:38 AM
57

This is such a great point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 08:30 PM
302

Thank you. This was one of the most difficult lessons for me to understand. We are socialized with such phrases as, “You have to do xyz to keep a man” or “What did she do to make him leave/cheat/abuse her?” When a man stays, women assume it is because we have finally cracked the code because we finally have “kept” someone. This is especially true for Black women. In reality, we have been bamboozled into adopting men who hate us. They hate us for settling with someone like them. They hate us beca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:20 PM
548

A few lessons to learn from this: Leave at the first sign of disrespect. I guarantee this is not the first time he has done something like this. It probably started with subtle negs in the beginning (“x is wrong with you, but you’re not like other girls because you’re loyal”🙄) and probably turned into triangulation with his friends, which is why he felt comfortable posting something like this publicly on social media. If you didn’t leave at the first sign of disrespect, make sure this is the las…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 04:19 PM
116

I think it’s a way to attempt to make you insecure. He talks up this great restaurant but you want to go. He’s “confused” and wants you to think that you’re not “good enough” for him to take you there and spend money on you there. So, this sticks in the back of your mind and you jump through hoops hoping if you do the “right things” and be the perfect pickme he’ll finally see that you deserve the steak dinner. Then, maybe a week or two from now he’ll casually start mentioning how he used to take…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 02:21 PM
30

What should I do? FDS multiple choice: A. gIVe HIm A cHAnCE B. Unemployed and unvaccinated men who make you uncomfortable are encouraged in each chapter of the FDS Handbook C. If you feel compelled to lie to a guy about your personal health choices before you even go on the first date it’s a great sign of how the next 40 years of your beautiful relationship are going to be D. Block and Delete
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 07:10 PM
52

People who meet, hook up immediately and are magically in a loving committed relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 06:54 PM
91

If you have advanced degrees, be wary of negs from men who have less education than you but also be aware of negs from men who are on the same page academically and career-wise. You’d think they have no reason to have an issue when you’re on the same level, but LVMs are everywhere and they tell on themselves accordingly. Some examples: Grad school bf telling me that taking 15 credits while working my part time internship wasn’t that hard, while he was taking 9 credits and on academic probation. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 05:06 AM
30

I’ll make it easy for you - block and delete immediately. Don’t give them a chance to offer a proper date because they already showed you who they are. Don’t try to “get it.” Most men are LV. That’s it. There’s nothing else to get. No more seatless Starbucks or random walks with strangers. Proper date or block. You are worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 03:49 AM
13

These are the types of male doctors that ignore and dismiss the pain of all of their women patients (especially WOC, but that’s a different post).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 03:29 AM
21

Agreed. My cousin has been “going through a divorce” for over 2 years. He’s “too stressed out” to go through the divorce proceedings but not too stressed out to be on dating sites and hooking up with random women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 08:19 PM
64

I do the same, but without the “sorry.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 11:07 AM
14

You’ve gotten so much great advice here. I just want to add that it is ok to stop and just feel terrible sometimes. That doesn’t mean that you can’t forgive yourself. That means you had a traumatic experience and that you are still healing from it. The memories are going to occasionally surface and it is ok to just stop and cry, to let the shame wash over you, to just mourn the person you used to be. Have compassion for that person you used to be and have gratitude for who you have become. Know …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 02:32 PM
137

Long comment alert: Several years ago and pre-FDS, my ex and I had only been together for 3 months when I went on a girls trip that I had booked long before we met. He was fired from his job a few days before I left, but he drove me to the airport in good spirits and texted me to make sure I got there safely. Then, after I started posting vacation pics on social with my friends, he texted me to tell me that I was clearly posting the pictures to mock him and to make him feel bad for losing his jo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 12:51 AM
198

Yes! I have a friend who was holding on to a situationship and kept asking “but why would he keep talking to me if he knows I want a relationship? That must mean he’ll change his mind.” No sis, he’s just exploiting your relationship desire.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 12:23 PM
20

Future faking with a side of triangulation: “I used to buy my ex flowers all the time and she never appreciated them like you do. I can’t wait to buy them for you every week.” Or “I can’t wait to take you on xyz vacation, I would pay for my ex to go and she would pout the whole time, I know you’ll have fun.” I only got flowers a few times and we never took that alleged paid vacation. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 10:54 AM
25

Because those women hopefully blocked and deleted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 01:03 AM
323

Before my Mom met my HV Dad, she said she would go out and never get hit on and wonder what was wrong with her. A male friend told her that because she carried herself with so much confidence, men knew not to approach her at all because she put off a “don’t even bother unless you have your shit right” energy. I have the same energy. I still go out with my friends, looking hot af, and haven’t been hit on in years. But I know that nothing is wrong. I broke up with my ex 3 years ago and simply have…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 11:58 PM
5

I agree. But my cousin is an incredible father but a terrible cheating pornsick husband. Add this to your forever vetting catalogue while understanding that one does not necessarily lend itself to the other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 10:42 PM
17

When I moved to a new City, I joined a bunch of a meetup groups and quit the ones that didn’t start on time. No drama, no anger, just search until you find the groups that respect your time. This applies to friends and dates. I now only attend group events that start on time and only spend time with friends who arrive on time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 09:59 PM
34

You already know the answer. If a guy wants to date you, he will contact you because he knows you’re the prize and doesn’t want to lose the chance of dating you to someone else. If you want to lower your standards, keep thinking about him. If you want to raise them, block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:12 PM
12

Create a schedule during the weekends. Hire someone for monthly cleans. It saves you so much time and mental energy and is worth every penny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:09 PM
12

A man not being able to get it up with a condom is a dealbreaker for me. I don’t care about any other traits after that. And he’s probably lying about the vasectomy to get you to have unprotected sex. “Assumed” you were exclusive? “Reacted badly”? You have a red flag parade here. You’re smarter than this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 12:15 PM
69

Here is the harsh FDS truth: you were not rejected, because another person can never reject you. We aren’t goods on a shelf being examined by the FDA for approval or rejection. The LVM trash took itself out and you’re choosing to make it mean that something is wrong with you instead of seeing it as a blessing that you dodged an LVM bullet. He saw how great you were and immediately knew he couldn’t even come close to your level. This is why when you see men in age gap relationships, you know they…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 02:07 AM
4

I was catching up with a friend and found out that her 27 year old niece’s live in boyfriend quit his job to pursue his dream of Twitch streaming. So, the niece is now working overtime to pay rent and all of the bills and then has to come home and feed and clean after this broke gaming man child. This would be my fear. If you date someone who plays video games, pay attention to his baseline level of responsibility, ambition and career stability.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 10:36 PM
126

Did you date my ex? He was an expert at the “I didn’t call you a bitch/dumbass/idiot, I said you were being one.” The gaslighting worked for almost a year.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 02:52 AM
95

I’m staying with my parents for the holiday weekend and found my old diary from college in my room. I would like to call it the Pickme Chronicles because it is really bad. Everything FDS warns about, I was doing: FWB that was neither friendly nor beneficial. Getting dreadgamed and breadcrumbed by guys who only returned my texts at 2am when they wanted to have sex. Wondering why this always happened to me when literally all I needed to do was block and delete at the first sign of disrespect. My p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 03:53 PM
17

I wouldn’t do texts. I would require phone calls or FaceTime. If he won’t do that, then you won’t have to worry about counting days.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 03:50 PM
9

The more time you spend on FDS, the more you will realize that it’s never a 180 and it is always the way that person was. Also, most men don’t see us as human so don’t take it personally. Finally, you are worthy of respect and you are honoring that by blocking and deleting. Take this time to grieve, level up and reflect. There were small red flags that you didn’t notice before that you will now notice sooner. Even if someone is planning dates, if they aren’t bringing up the exclusivity talk firs…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 02:35 PM
12

I don’t think he lied. He wants a relationship, for all of the time wasting, manipulation and free emotional labor that it brings. That’s why he overstayed in the last one. He doesn’t want the same type of loving, supportive and emotionally mature relationship that you want. The trap that we fall into when we ask the question “do you want a relationship?” and the man says “yes” is we don’t hear the silent “but not with you” part.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 01:05 PM
69

A blank stare with silence really messes them up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 12:08 PM
49

Ladies, remember that some men see their friends as humans and you as property. Don’t question why he does this, just leave at the first sign of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 07:30 PM
176

There’s a lot of great advice here. I’ll just be blunt and say if you feel compelled to go to Reddit for advice about a man you are with, there is a 99% chance he is LVM. I’ve been there and trust me, the global Reddit question always stems from a gut feeling that this guy is not going to work out. If you were with someone who had a provider mindset and wasn’t making unrealistic plans about “taking turns” working while you have a baby (Huh?!) you wouldn’t need to ask Reddit. Your friends already…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 03:16 PM
44

The first red flag for me was him asking you to watch his things. Maybe I watch too many serial killer docs but Ted Bundy used to ask women for favors to create a false sense of connection before throwing them in the back of his van. I am suspect of any male stranger asking a woman for a favor. “Take your damn things with you to the car to get your charger.”😂 And please block these fools immediately the second they get suggestive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 10:52 AM
46

What’s worse is when I finally broke up with him after 4 years of this nonsense, he suddenly found 2 jobs. If he wanted to he would!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 09:30 AM
135

I’m so embarrassed to say that I was that woman in my last relationship. 🤡 I contacted multiple people on his behalf, sent him job postings, set up conference calls with him and prospective employers. He would talk to the people and then never follow up and then get frustrated when I’d ask him what happened and he would blame them for “never responding again.” He would get jobs and then get fired because he was terrible but blame it on people “always sabotaging” him. Ladies, I know we are in a r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 01:57 AM
5

Next time on Dateline NBC with Keith Morrison: The OLD Vial Serial Killer. Find out how he lures his OLD dates with pocket bacon and stores the ashes of all of his OLD victims in various pocket vials that he pretends are his mother. Tonight at 11.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 08:28 PM
3

Yep! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 08:59 PM
5

This should be its own post!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 08:01 PM
6

This is my favorite episode so far with the Gail Dines episode being a very close 2nd. So many gems of wisdom in this episode. I will be listening to it again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 02:51 PM
34

I always think about that scene in the Lion King when Queen Sarabi has to go into the hyena den to talk to Scar and they’re all snarling and she walks in with her head held high and is so unbothered. I try to keep that same energy when insecure men do insecure things. I have been fortunate to date men who are not intimidated by my education and career success and have encouraged it. Even though it didn’t work out with them, I know such men exist and I won’t accept any amount of disrespect or neg…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 04:11 PM
61

This reminds me of a male colleague making negative comments about Cardi B being pregnant because it was keeping her from making music. I said how about she’s not here for your entertainment? Plus, she’s literally been shooting music videos pregnant and naked, what else do you LVM want?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 03:57 PM
31

I didn’t even know about this and googled when I saw your comment. I am absolutely disgusted!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 03:54 PM
2

I completely agree. I’m way past the school stage of life, but I’m involved in local meetups and sports and definitely not making OLD the only avenue.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 11:44 AM
3

Thanks! As I said in another reply, he wrote a paragraph commenting on multiple parts of my profile like an Amazon review. I have yet to get the middle ground of good questions so I haven’t had the opportunity to entertain much of anything. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 11:39 AM
184

This is why It feels like an LVM marries the next person after you break up with him. He took all the things you taught him that he should be doing and yet refused to do and applied them to the next person who is now stuck with his LV ass when his mask slips after he traps her with kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 05:44 PM
19

Thanks! To clarify, he wrote a wall of text commenting on every part of my profile. So it was like an Amazon review. I blocked and deleted when he sent a second message saying that he hoped he didn’t scare me with the long message and that so many women had been writing him but I was the only one that seemed normal. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:42 PM
13

I can’t believe you walked away from the exciting opportunity of joining (subsidizing) his poly van life! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 01:42 AM
7

Sometimes you have to block and delete LV friends just like you do with LVM. You are your first priority. You can care about someone but that doesn’t mean they have to be in your life if they don’t add value to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 12:35 AM
37

After listening to the FDS Podcast about OLD, I joined again and got a bunch of standard low effort “Hi.” messages that I promptly blocked. Then, I just got one of those long 2 paragraph messages that completely turned me off. Maybe I’m overthinking it, but I don’t want to date someone who thinks a wall of text is the way to my heart. I’m looking for the happy medium. Mention one thing in my profile, not a full Amazon review.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 12:33 AM
34

*Tough love alert* FDS method: Block him on the new number (and every other new number he attempts to contact you on), take responsibility for your past mistakes with an LVM (I too made the mistake of buying my broke LVX a laptop and other things that I never got paid back for and never will), and stand in your power going forward. Your method: Give him and his family even more of your unpaid emotional labor, power and time with the belief that the “closure” of getting paid will make you feel be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 06:01 PM
40

I’m sorry this happened to you. But I would gently advise against contacting him or his mom about this. Negative attention is still satisfying attention for men. They will do anything to get back in and spend time rent-free in our minds. Don’t fall for the trap. Consider the money you spent tuition in the school of hard knocks and don’t look back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 04:35 PM
55

I occasionally put pictures like these through Google reverse image search and they’re always stock photos.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 12:58 AM
24

Or leave the second they take your bacon or taco so they don’t have a chance to tell you they “forgot.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 07:53 PM
36

Even if they have nothing, they’ll still have the audacity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 07:10 PM
56

Is it wrong that I’m more mad about the bacon than the “forgotten” wallet?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 07:06 PM
174

Ugh they get this from porn. I just want to scream PORN IS NOT REAL LIFE! NOBODY LIKES GETTING THEIR VAGINA SLAPPED!!! 🗣🗣🗣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 11:22 PM
23

I have a friend like this. I have recommended websites, this sub and plenty of books. She continues to listen to me and then continues to stay with these trashy abusive men. I’ve decided to distance myself from her so that she isn’t using me as an emotional vending machine but I’m here if she ever chooses to utilize the resources I pointed to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 03:23 PM
71

My prepared answer for “What’s your biggest fear?” is “Answering stupid questions” 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:16 PM
20

“Die mad” is my favorite part of each episode. 😅 These mods get harassing messages and threats by men on a regular basis. It’s a shout out to those men who are mad about women being empowered by FDS principles, who will remain mad about women respecting themselves and raising their standards until they die, that we will continue to do our Queen shit and that we don’t care. “Die mad!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 01:51 AM
5

Number 4 made me laugh because I don’t like being around negative self-sabotaging people and I would have avoided my broke LVM ex in social circles and I would have also secretly felt sorry for his girlfriend for putting up with him and expecting him to change. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 07:21 PM
15

A few things I remember after trying to be loyal and supportive to my broke LVM ex: The highs and lows of waiting for him to just get this one job so that you two can finally live the fairytale life is the absolute worst. Thinking that he’s perfect except for the fact that every workplace is jealous of him and sabotages him because you believe his hyperbole and lies and don't realize that he's just terrible at his job. Being temporarily excited when he gets a new job but then slowly losing that …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 08:38 PM
27

He will not be able to afford to live anywhere else if/when we breakup. I thought this before breaking up with my broke ex. You would be surprised at what grown humans can figure out when they are not leaching off of you. He was suddenly able to find two jobs and get a smaller affordable apartment, something I had been begging him to do for 2 years (he couldn’t afford the rent payments for his apartment after getting fired for the 2nd time since he lived there, but kept crying that he couldn’t a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 08:03 PM
39

I always logically understood this, but I struggled with the belief that he would choose to change if I was “good enough.” Don’t fall into this trap. Don’t beat yourself up for something that is not your responsibility or problem. Don’t tell yourself that he changed for the next person. It’s all a lie. There is nothing you could have done and no other person you could have been. You are good enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 04:21 PM
58

A man I met and gave my number to at a party texted me asking me to meet him at the laundromat on a Tuesday. I’m sure he told his friends I missed out on an awesome weekday laundry date when that block and delete hit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 11:35 PM
55

And don’t give a man you are not married to copies of your keys! I made that mistake with my ex. Thankfully, he gave me his copy back during the breakup and the landlord had to get the door repaired and changed the locks a few months later, but in hindsight, I should have changed the locks immediately.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 09:41 PM
2

A couple things I’ve tried are gray rocking (being boring) or the opposite has worked - where I start talking over their story and monopolize the conversation with my own. “Oh that reminds me of when something like that happened to me...” I plan an equally robust session of word vomit and once they realize their attempt to force me to listen to them has failed, they quickly scurry away. Give it a try.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 07:29 PM
12

This deserves its own post!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 03:01 AM
157

Or he’s broken her self esteem down so severely that she won’t leave him because she is convinced no one will ever want her. This is what I assume whenever I see a beautiful woman with an abusive ogre.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 05:50 PM
47

Don’t let them manipulate you with sob stories. “I have a hard time communicating my feelings because of: a) my upbringing b) my ex c) vague references to “bad things happening in the past” 🎻🎻🎻 None of these are your problem. If you start thinking “You poor thing,” or “He’s been through so much, I can’t just leave him” you need to stop and move on. In fact, anytime you are gaslighting yourself with “I can’t just leave because of xyz” remember that you absolutely can just leave because of anythin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 05:15 PM
18

Thanks to FDS, I know that a date walking too fast is a red flag... in addition to all the other red flags she unfortunately ignored.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 12:49 AM
11

How long will it take to get the degree that you want to go back to school for? If it takes 4 years then, in 4 years you will be 32 with a degree thinking “I should have my life together/I wasted years” or 32 without a degree and thinking “I should have my life together/I wasted years.” Your mindset will follow you no matter what choice you make. You are not old and you shouldn’t be anywhere but where you are now. And even if you don’t believe that, then so what? Let’s say you are at the ripe ol…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 10:03 PM
16

We’ve all been there sis. Just remember that the majority of men that you have a first date with are LVM and don’t even save their names in your phone until they have been vetted past the 3rd or 4th date. If someone is negging on the first date, then he is LVM. You’re getting the best you’ll ever get.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:10 PM
16

Keep vetting but I’m glad it’s going well. My closeted gay college ex also had a clean apartment and was a great cook. The sex was also phenomenal but it didn’t change the fact that he was gay and dishonest about it for the year we were together. Don’t ignore your gut. Please keep us updated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:01 PM
117

I don’t mean to be morbid but this makes me think of women who died alone in hospitals during COVID when people couldn’t have visitors. I wonder how many women who put up with a shitty LVM husband for 20 or 30 years just so they wouldn’t have to die alone were on a ventilator thinking “Well shit.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 10:31 AM
79

orgasms? I can use a vibrator. I personally recommend the Satisfyer Pro 2. Drama-free guaranteed orgasms every time!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 02:15 AM
9

It’s amazing how everyone in our lives make logical sense except for men who tell lazy lies. A responsible adult who breaks up with a crazy person either asks for their keys back or changes his locks. I don’t know any humans who do not sleep with their phone directly next to them. So this means she sleuthed into his bedroom in the middle of the night, found his phone in the dark, unlocked it, found your name, knew who you were, texted you, then sleuthed back into his room and put the phone back,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 07:08 PM
14

I just say that my ex and I wanted different things and we weren’t a match. If the questions persist beyond my vague answer I say I’m future focused and don’t find discussing exes useful. If they keep asking, then I know it’s not going to work and block and delete. A close friend of mine had a terrible 7 year relationship before finding her current HVM husband. To this day, she has never discussed that last relationship or any past relationship with her husband and never will. Most HVM won’t eve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 06:44 PM
44

You have great self awareness and it will only get better while you’re here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 03:44 PM
99

I’m so glad that you listened to your gut. Just be careful with how you characterize low effort behavior so that you are not ignoring easy to spot red flags. Compliments and future faking about cooking and taking you out communicated through text messaging is not “chivalrous”. A strange man inviting you to an isolated area on a first date, whether it is his apartment or a hotel, is dangerous. And who cares what culture he is from? What do you want? If you want a video chat, a phone call and a pr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 03:27 PM
3

I recommend listening to the “How to Stop Wanting Him Back” podcast by Claire Byrne and “Unf*ck Your Brain” by Kara Loewentheil. They both have similar coaching philosophies. I found my Coach through guests on their shows.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:01 AM
30

As someone who grew up in a loving family with a HVM Dad, who has watched the relationship between my parents age like fine wine over the years, I have come to the conclusion that I would rather die alone than to accept anything less.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:53 AM
27

My Mom called her father (my grandfather) Daddy and I didn’t think anything of it. She recently told me that she briefly dated someone (long before marrying my HVM Dad) who made a joke about her calling her father Daddy and she shut the shit down immediately and broke up with him soon after that (yay to my FDS Mom blocking and deleting in the 1970s!). She told me to watch out for any disparaging remarks men make about your closeness with your parents or family because that often means they have …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:46 AM
7

I really struggled with this for 2 years after my breakup. I didn’t want him back but I kept getting so enraged about everything. First, I had to forgive myself for not seeing red flags, for not leaving sooner and for allowing myself to believe all his bullshit. Then, I had to let go of the idea that if I had been better, he would have gotten better. That some magical version of myself would have transformed him into my projection of his potential. Nope. That person never existed. Finally, I had…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 11:31 PM
17

I would call this an unacceptable dealbreaker regardless of what causes it, but yes, it is probably pornsickness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 08:06 PM
3

Block and delete works for LVWs too. You may not be ready for that but it is always an option. I had a friend like this and I started ignoring her calls. She tried calling me out on social media for not responding to her and I ignored her posts. Eventually she stopped trying to contact me. Google “people pleasing” and it will give you some insight into why you feel like you can’t say no. Good luck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 02:04 AM
3

If you’re conflicted, then listen to your gut. If both his voice and mannerisms are feminine and you don’t like it, then don’t force yourself to like it. And conversations about exes early on, especially about allegedly abusive ones, is a huge red flag. I think of discussing exes like discussing car accidents. Most of us have had at least one, but why would someone bring it up during the first few dates unless they’re trying to get you accept their car’s dents and deficiencies before you ride in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 01:53 AM
28

This should be its own post! They have no idea what they want! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 12:12 AM
20

I definitely had an ex that did this. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:32 AM
15

My LVX from grad school would constantly tell me that me taking 15 credits and interning part time while making the Deans List “was not that hard” while he was taking 9 credits and on academic probation. He would neg me on the weirdest things: he didn’t like how I took small sips of juice, how I ate popcorn one piece at a time, how I laughed “too loud”, etc. Everything little thing I did required a comment from him. At the time, I didn’t understand how someone that was in the same grad program c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/21 01:46 AM
9

Ladies, this is why it is critical to be clear about what you will and will not tolerate before you start dating. If you are clear that a grown man should have healthy boundaries with friends of the same and opposite sex, the first time he mentions that he sleeps with his best friend will be enough for you to walk away early. Otherwise you will always be gaslit by people who will tell you that your standards are too high, even if they are bare minimum one level above hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 03:24 PM
4

I would have left when he asked to split and blocked and deleted on my way to my car. Don’t even give these LVM a second thought. And be careful with morning dates, they are indicative of a man who is cheating. A single HVM will want to take you dinner where people can see what an awesome woman he is with, not hide you in the morning by a taco truck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/21 11:48 AM
3

Don’t let a guy get past the 1st time they compare you to their ex. It’s generally a red flag and an invitation to block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/21 02:13 AM
3

Take this time to heal and to do things for yourself. Re-read the FDS Handbook and make sure you read some of the books on the FDS reading list. These really changed everything for me. https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/wiki/recommended_reading_books2
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 08:58 PM
24

The way I just hollered 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 08:01 PM
16

Back in high school when everyone was getting their college acceptance letters, my close friend, who was in a relationship with a cheating LVM, got into an out of state private college across the country and a local college in our town. Nothing was wrong with the local college but the private college would have been a fresh start for her, away from this LVM, and would have been a great opportunity for her to get to know herself. She chose to stay local so she could be with LVM. They broke up aft…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 03:12 PM
6

Question: If you take the pill every day at the same time how do you keep it a secret from a guy if you’ve got to take it while you’re with him? Example: If you’re at the commitment stage where you are spending a weekend together, how do you hide it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:08 AM
7

I always think about this when I watch unmarried couples buy houses together on House Hunters and, based on their icy interactions throughout the 30 minute episode, clearly are already on the road to breaking up. It always looks like a recipe for disaster and future lost assets for the woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 12:25 PM
7

If your first gut feeling is uncomfortable, don’t gaslight yourself with “maybe I should give him a chance.” Your gut already told you the answer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 02:34 AM
19

I’m currently reading “Ghosted and Breadcrumbed” by Dr. Marni Feuerman and she talks about this briefly when it comes to whether a man is available or not. I always defer to the FDS “if he wanted to he would” mantra for everything. If you mention it to him once and he does not change the behavior, then that’s the answer. That is how it is going to be forever and his unwillingness to make time for you will show up all areas of your relationship over time. Decide whether you want to continue like …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 05:38 PM
70

To anyone who reads this and thinks “I can’t just say nothing!” Think about this: Responding gives him attention. He isn’t looking to learn, discuss or see things from your perspective. He is looking to waste your time by getting the dopamine hit of knowing he has the control over your attention and emotions. The fact that you are trying to change his mind about something shows him that you have the erroneous belief that you can (Nothing we say, no matter how clever we think it is, will ever cha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 02:54 PM
27

I’ve posted previously about how I venmoed my broke LVX while out to dinner with other couples so he could “pay.” 🤡 I’m so embarrassed looking back at my pre-FDS life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 12:50 PM
107

I remember years ago when my cousin and my aunt were out on a mother-son dinner and when my aunt went to the bathroom, women followed her in there asking if she’d give him their phone numbers. An attractive guy friend from college told me about a time a woman damn near chased him down in a CVS parking lot to give him her number. This is part of why I don’t even bother with OLD because the attractive ones don’t need it. You need to find them out in the wild. 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 11:11 AM
32

My verbally abusive LVX from grad school had me convinced I had a drinking problem because I drank so heavily when we were together. After we broke up, and I had almost no desire to drink, I realized the problem was him. I was binge drinking bc the relationship was so miserable. I also no longer had stomach problems or headaches. It’s amazing how that works.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 01:51 AM
3

My understanding from the book “Why Does He Do That” is that it’s all a ruse and they’re outwardly kind to make their partner feel crazy and think that there’s something wrong with them, otherwise why would he be nice to everyone else? It also makes it more difficult for the woman to get help when abused because no one believes that this nice wonderful guy would do such a thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 03:07 AM
1

Cultivate relationships with female friends. Example: I have a group of friends who I have Zoom movie night with every weekend. Plan out your days ahead of time so you’re not allowing your brain to ruminate about being alone. Decide you are going to binge watch a certain show. Decide you’re going to light candles and read a book. Decide you’re going to take a walk. If you are looking forward to something, you are less likely to fall into the sad thoughts. Journal. Do not try to push away the fee…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 09:32 PM
19

Thinks back to my 20s pickme days in shame... yes. 😞
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 12:27 PM
1

This previous post really gave me perspective on why crushes are not beneficial at all: https://reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/dl57z2/there_is_zero_benefit_to_having_a_crush_eliminate/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 01:10 AM
6

It’s called triangulation and it is a huge red flag. I react with silence. The kind of silence that happens when you block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:45 AM
2

Just keep your focus on what you want. Don’t make it mean that he’s terrible, future faking, lying or any of that. It’s ok to be aware that this is likely what is happening, but focusing on it too much just creates more suffering for you and puts you into a “if I am different he may change his mind” or “if he is bad, the solution is for me to be good to show him how bad he is” losing thought spiral that will keep you from moving forward with the energy you need. If you focus 100% on yourself, wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:09 PM
105

This is why if a potential date is using language like “I’m looking for my black Queen” I get a bit uneasy because it’s usually code for “I’m looking for someone to fix me and put up with shit that I am unwilling to take responsibility for and fix myself.” They’re looking for a fairytale not a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 01:39 PM
6

We all want to make this complicated, go through all the facts, and indulge in confusion about what is the “right” thing to do. It’s simple: what type of relationship do you want? Have you expressed what you want? Has he, through his actions, indicated to you that he is not willing to have the type of relationship that you want right now (not at some fantasy time in the future)? If the answers are clear, then your decision is clear. Your suffering comes from fighting reality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 01:23 PM
3

When this happens, I assume they knew they couldn’t do any better than you, found someone with low standards who will put up with their bs and decided to rush that person into a serious relationship before the other person realized how unavailable they were. Now he’s potentially rushed someone into a toxic life that you dodged. The main way to get past this is to acknowledge and process your feelings of sadness, block and delete him everywhere if you haven’t already and focus on yourself and lev…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 04:25 AM
3

It sounds like he is grooming you for low standards, disappointment and setting you up to try to be the person that helps him love for the first time while he slowly deteriorates your self esteem. You can’t create something that he doesn’t have the capacity to give himself. Run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 02:44 AM
2

I did this dance with my LVX for 4 years. Grown men who use their past as an excuse for not being good partners now are not dating material. In fact, any story that a potential partner tells you early on for the purpose of eliciting sympathy is generally a huge red flag. It is trauma bonding meant to create false intimacy and to lower your standards. It makes you believe you can love them out of their victim mindset, but they have no reason to change if you demonstrate your low standards by stay…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/21 01:44 AM
9

They are selfish and cannot understand how someone has the ability to care about others enough to make the selfless gesture of a gift. They misdirect their resentment of your selflessness by trying to sabotage it so it won’t bring attention to their inability to even try.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 03:09 AM
7

Every time you have a negative thought, ask yourself “so what?” So what if no contact is rude? So what if he thinks you are a bitch? Who is “everyone else”? 5 people? 10 people? So what if a limited number of people think you’re a bitch for setting healthy boundaries and making yourself a priority? Your answers to those questions will help you see that it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks. It matters what you think. Focus on the fact that no-contact is an act of self love. It’ll take time and pr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 12:17 AM
4

This is one of the reasons why I stayed with my ex 2 years longer than I should have.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 04:11 PM
9

It’s so he can violate your boundaries, show you how your conversation is less important than what he has to say, and then use your annoyance as justification to continue to label women as emotional and crazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 10:49 PM
45

Sadly, an 18 year old who has never seen the towers and slept through history class may swipe and get catfished by this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 08:00 PM
53

It’s just like lazy profiles on OLD “just ask!” = just run away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 10:12 PM
156

Also in this category is not checking to make sure you got home safely if you came in different cars/used public transit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 05:45 PM
14

In my 20s I used to do the numbers thing and I also used to do this dumb thing where I’d ask God to play a certain song on the radio if I’m supposed to stay with him. It would always be a top 40 song that would inevitably always be on the radio but my pickme mind just knew it was God. Meanwhile, he was looking at me like that. 🙄😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 05:14 PM
23

Oh look at that standard copy/paste paragraph answer for when a woman asks him about how he feels about COVID. He has probably been sending that paragraph since March.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 10:38 PM
40

Yep, I don’t plan on dating until the summer. That’s assuming we will get the vaccine by then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 06:58 PM
10

She thinks she is his girlfriend but she is not. She doesn’t mention her age but there is a clear power imbalance that suggests an unhealthy age difference. Please block and delete
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 02:41 AM
14

I did this “because he’s depressed” dance for 4 years. It’s not worth it sis. I read a comment on another thread yesterday that said something to the effect of “we get less than what we settle for.” I settled for the depressed guy who turned into the guy whose depression made him chronically unemployed and it got worse and worse and I got much less than what I settled for. Don’t let guilt or sunk cost fallacy keep you there longer than you need to be because it does not get better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 03:39 PM
26

I came here to say the same! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 03:36 AM
2

My last date (pre-FDS) showed up 1 hour late 🚩. I should have left🤡 but I was starving and since he didn’t make a reservation for a Saturday dinner in a busy City 🚩I figured that by the time he got there we’d get a table. A table opened right after he got here. I was nervous and was talking with my hands and knocked a full pint of beer into his lap🍺. He was a good sport about it. Dinner was great, conversation was great and he paid without incident. We went to a bar down the street and talked un…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 08:09 PM
9

Your comment just made me realize that “cancel culture” didn’t have a name until it happened to men. Women and minorities have been canceled for centuries for speaking out against injustice, harassment and oppression. Now that the oppressors are finally being called out and held accountable, it’s given the name “cancel culture” as if it’s this new thing. It’s new to them. And now it’s a problem that men have decided must stop... unless they’re doing it to women. When they do it to women like OP,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 04:44 AM
34

This happened to my friend’s Mom who is in her 50s. She started dating someone who we all thought was a nice man. He stayed over at her house a majority of the time and then when the relationship went south a few months later and she ended it, he refused to leave. I don’t know all of the details but her mom had to go to court and go through eviction proceedings in court, which took about a month. She is so lucky that he was not violent and just acted like nothing was wrong the whole time. But ju…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 10:42 PM
5

It’s only been 5 months and you are already uncomfortable. Save this thread and come back to it as this feeling grows and grows the longer you stay.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 02:48 PM
5

Eh... nothing will change. Decide whether you are willing to put up with it or not. Otherwise, you’ll continue to have long conversations where you “appear to get through to him” and he throws out some other nonsensical condition for change that will never happen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 01:49 PM
24

Well, I’ll give you the short blunt dissatisfying answer: read the FDS Handbook and the book “He’s Just Not That Into You.” This subreddit also has multiple posts about age differences that you can search that can give you perspective about why seemingly accomplished older men seek out younger women because women their age won’t put up with their bs. I think you already know what to do but you are holding out for potential that was never there to begin with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 04:16 PM
7

I don’t remember the handbook setting a hard date or restriction for meeting friends. (Please feel free to correct me!) But I do remember there being a section about making sure he treats you with respect in group settings and around his friends as part of the vetting process. This may be a good way to do this. I don’t see a problem going to the holiday party with him other than COVID concerns. Just always be aware of your surroundings and have a way to leave if you feel uncomfortable, just like…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 05:19 PM
13

I’ve been watching this as well and my heart breaks for Diana. Society fed us with the Princess fantasy as we were growing up but it doesn’t matter if your Prince Charming cheats on you, gaslights you, and resents you for being the Princess/Queen that you are. I kinda hope Elizabeth outlives Charles so we can skip directly to William being King.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 04:37 PM
1

I met HV friends when I leveled up (educationally, professionally and financially), and they are a great source of emotional support. Some of the best friends I have are people I met during my first internship out of grad school. I joined various groups on Meetup and can still meet with my running group despite COVID because we are outside and socially distanced. I have a therapist and a life coach who help me process loneliness, overwhelm and to help me plan and execute short term and long term…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 03:49 PM
9

At least he has a vacuum so you can clean up after he has friends come over to watch a Saints game. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/20 08:38 PM
12

Oh they understand. They just don’t care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/20 01:49 PM
14

I dated my best friend of 10 years for a few months and that was a completely different experience than our friendship. It ended up not working out because of distance (I got a job out of state) but there were things that he did as a friend (forgetting my birthday, not doing anything for me for graduation, refusing to compromise on simple things) that were unacceptable as a parter. You’ve got to vet him as if he is a new person. And don’t ignore red flags like I did just because he “knows you be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/20 11:38 AM
18

Thank you! Not to discredit the shared negative experience of being told to smile, but this didn’t happen. Not within the last 9 months, because everyone was wearing masks and had no idea who was smiling or what anyone was saying because of social distancing, and it didn’t happen before that, because black women only do that in old racist cartoons, sitcoms and fake Twitter stories.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 02:20 PM
7

he forgot his password to his old Instagram (I find a lot of men forget their passwords) There is always a “forgot password” option to reset a password. He kept the old account so he could look at the other women without you knowing. Or maybe he wanted you to look so he could take pleasure making you feel inferior. Either way, you are being gaslit and lied to and this does not get any better. I saw you wrote in another comment that you believe you are stuck because of financial circumstances, bu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 01:31 PM
77

Since I’ve been working from home, I sometimes turn on trashy tv to play in the background and I will tell you that the majority of the cheaters on Divorce Court and Maury are unattractive and they have no shortage of people to cheat with despite the unattractiveness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 10:20 PM
9

As soon as I saw “...but we haven’t met yet.” I immediately made the whatever meme face. https://i.4pcdn.org/pol/1543839445433.jpg
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 04:42 AM
109

Date went well overall, there were a lot of green flags. He’s very much my type and meets a lot of my criteria that I look for in a man. I’m cringing so hard at this because I used to do this. The fact that a man can chew with his mouth closed, hold a conversation for 2 hours, and pay for dinner does not mean he’s very much my type. It means he met the lowest of the barest of minimums, I am projecting an idealized version of him into my future, and I’m trying to make it mean that this can be the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 04:11 AM
21

My HVM Dad buys my Mom expensive clothes and shoes and has been getting it right for 40 years. If they want to, they will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 04:42 PM
21

I’ve struggled with this. I don’t want to “give up” on them but after my last relationship, I’m extremely jaded and no longer interested in the ride or die/struggle love narrative. But I guess I need to get up on the Kamala/Doug narrative.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/20 12:32 AM
32

This is a tough question to answer because everyone reacts to non-black allies differently. For me, I think the first step is being aware that this is an additional form of trauma that black women endure. Then, when a black friend mentions it or confides in you, just listen compassionately and empathetically instead of doing what some “friends” do by making excuses for the actions of men or discounting or discrediting the experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/20 12:23 AM
12

When I was in my 20s in grad school, I dated a LVM for almost a year and I remember while out at a bar one night one of my friends who was in a long term relationship at the time drunkenly telling me she wished she had a relationship like me and my guy. She knew absolutely nothing about our shitty relationship except for the facade we put on when we were out in group settings together and on social media, pretending to be happy. He cooked. He got me flowers. I posted about this on social media. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 10:55 PM
11

Imagine what these men will be like if you lower your standards, marry them, and they exhaust all your health insurance when all their bad hygiene habits catch up to them. Imagine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 04:29 PM
49

Your edit... Sis, you can unmatch anyone for any reason at any time. So what if you see him? There is a slim chance you may see him out in the world so now you have to... what? Have additional mediocre chats with him for eternity? Worst case scenario: if you see him, you’ll just tell him you didn’t know it was him because you were expecting him to be “maybe 5’9” /s. He is likely lying about his height, he doesn’t meet your minimum workout standards and it sounds like his conversation skills are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 02:23 AM
2

There is obviously something wrong with you. /s NO! Your value is not determined by anyone outside of you. You define your value. Not this LVM. Not his new gf. Not his Mom. YOU! And guess what? You are valuable because you exist. From the second you entered this world, you were valuable. Nothing is wrong with you. You are grieving the loss of a relationship and you should take that time to truly grieve. But a huge part of that grieving process is joining the Blocked Ministry: blocking him on you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 11:32 PM
21

I am a proud member of the Blocked Ministry. Treat that block button like it is a religious edict and don’t look back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 06:50 PM
105

I automatically delete anyone who opens with a comment about my personal appearance because he is seeing me as an object and not a potential wife and it always turns sexual and inappropriate immediately. Once my friends told me that I was being too harsh and I gave a guy who sent me a “Hey beautiful” opening a chance. He asked me what my favorite food was, I said tacos and he said he’d like to eat my taco. Blocked. Listen to your gut and stick to your rules to avoid OLD harassment. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 05:35 PM
19

I was a whole entire clown sis! 🤡🤡🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 11:55 PM
42

I once Venmoed my broke ex money while out on a group date with 2 other couples so it would look like he paid our portion of the bill. So sad!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 08:37 PM
13

Ewe. Just post the quote without the scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 08:14 PM
45

I see your point, but imagine being RBG, having broken all the glass ceilings for women, and in a position to finally serve under the first woman President. Then, expecting Scalia’s seat to be filled by an Obama appointee, ensuring a left leaning court. Then, watching the unprecedented feat of Merrick Garland getting blocked from Scalia’s seat from February through DT’s inauguration in January. She may have considered retiring before, but was then essentially trapped by the prospect of two seats…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 01:47 PM
27

Back in my pickmeisha days, I was dating a guy who was on his best behavior for the first few dates. We would often have a nice dinner then drinks at a bar with his friends. I invited him to a double date with my childhood friend and his gf who had recently moved into the area and I was really excited. I thought that since the guy was bringing me around his friends that it would be fine to have him meet mine and he seemed really interested to go and gave no indication that it was weird or moving…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 12:02 PM
29

Please be careful getting in cars with men you’ve been involved with. I had a brief FWB with a guy several years ago that I met in a professional organization that we were both members of and we remained cordial when it ended. One night after an org meeting he asked for a ride home because his car was in the shop. When we got to his driveway, he immediately began aggressively grabbing and kissing me. I had to tell him no several times and push him off of me. It was scary. I yeeted out of there. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 07:41 PM
4

Professional jealousy. Every time he would succeed on a big project, he said his co-workers would turn against him and overly scrutinize his work until he eventually would get fired. “The industry is racist.” I believed this excuse until he was fired from his 3rd job, a minority-owned company. Failure to Follow Up. I gave him contact info to several people who were at the top of their respective industries. His excuses would range from “they never called back” and if I encouraged him to follow u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 06:50 PM
40

when you take someone who is a teensy bit depressed or avoidant by nature, and you put that person in a situation where that person doesn’t have to work — or at least can get away with barely working for a while — that person will find new, creative ways to avoid work indefinitely. This was almost me a couple years ago. I was going to move my bf (who had lost 3 jobs in the 4 years we were together and was unemployed at the time) in with me because I was sure once he moved in, he would have the s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:18 PM
18

I love this! Myself and 3 of my friends had an outdoor reservation at one of our favorite restaurants which is a little pricey and one friend found out she was furloughed and said she wouldn’t be able to make it for financial reasons. We told her absolutely not, that we’d cover her and that she had to go. She was really emotional and grateful and we had a great time. We did this with no expectations, we just wanted to enjoy each others’ company. Imagine that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 12:06 AM
59

This looks like this is something he copies and pastes from his notes app every time a HVW asks for a proper date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 11:56 PM
6

I immediately block after “Hey.” Ain’t nobody got time for that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 09:47 AM
25

I see other women as Queens! Yesterday walking to the gym, I was like WOW my city has sooo many beautiful women. Rather than feel competitive, I uphold them. Yes! prior to COVID I went to multiple Match events (speed dating, happy hours, museum tours, etc.) and ended up meeting and making friends with so many gorgeous women that we started hanging out together on our own. No competition, just power.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 01:59 AM
34

“How are you still single?” Obnoxious overuse of emojis “I bet there are just lines of guys waiting to talk to you.” 🤢 “Tell me about your last relationship, it will help me learn about your character.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 11:05 AM
5

Thank you for this. Before discovering FDS, I was convinced I wanted to have a hiking date because that’s one of my favorite hobbies and to make sure the guy is athletic and can keep up with me on a 12 mile hike. But now I’m realizing that’s a low effort serial killer attracting date. So, yes, dinner please! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 02:25 PM
15

When I was in grad school, I once had a guy ask me to meet him at the laundromat while he was washing clothes. Block.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 03:36 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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