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SouthernAthena Archive

View 26 posts and 875 comments by SouthernAthena on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
116

RELATIONSHIPSSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 01:04 AM
64

DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 07:29 AM
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THEORYSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen09/07/16 08:23 PM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 03:21 PM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 03:51 PM
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THEORYSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 01:19 AM
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FIELD REPORTSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 01:11 AM
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LIFESTYLESouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen14/08/17 04:19 AM
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PARENTINGSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen06/07/17 05:04 AM
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OFF TOPICSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen08/03/17 10:00 PM
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FIELD REPORTSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen23/07/16 10:24 PM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen25/11/16 03:30 AM
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LIFESTYLESouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen22/09/17 03:37 AM
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ADVICESouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen28/07/16 11:39 PM
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SELF IMPROVEMENTSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen28/08/16 05:31 PM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 03:44 PM
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FIELD REPORTSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 05:52 AM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen17/09/17 11:19 PM
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ADVICESouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen01/09/16 07:52 PM
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PARENTINGSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 11:41 PM
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ADVICESouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen05/02/17 09:30 PM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 09:02 AM
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LTR/MARRIAGESouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 03:54 AM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen22/08/16 11:39 PM
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DISCUSSIONSouthernAthena/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 02:48 AM
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SouthernAthena/r/askTRP06/04/17 12:37 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

This is great advice and is very much in line with what I tell young women who are painfully shy or stuck behind screens. I know it works because I made a similar transformation myself. I never used dating apps, but I used to be very awkward and antisocial, and these are the methods I used to break out of my shell. It had enhanced my life on many levels.
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/18 02:19 PM
2

As u/loneliness-inc said, he is withdrawing from a combination of two things: 1. That's how men often deal with emotional burdens 2. You have been critical when he reaches out. To repair this, I would apologize to him. Say something simple like "I am sorry I was critical and dismissive when you opened up to me. I should have been more supportive." and leave it at that. DO NOT make any justifications for why you acted that way (well I just thought that if you reframed your perspective...), Becaus…
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/18 02:31 PM
29

I am convinced that the people who put down being a housewife do so to convince themselves it's a bad option, otherwise they may start to realize how dissatisfied they are with their situation.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/18 03:01 PM
5

Check out This article for some ideas. Being feminine is about your behavior, not just the way you dress.
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/18 05:39 PM
2

I saw my boyfriend's brother in law go through this. His daughter got over it in time. She would basically scream every time be tried to hold out kiss her. He did the same thing your husband does and kind of just held onto her. She got over it eventually. It was maybe a 6 month or so period that she did this? I think you just need to give it time and be affectionate with him in front of her. Show her that he is safe and good with your actions.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/18 02:57 PM
1

I'd say bite the bullet and try to get along with her. If you're serious about this guy, she's going to be in your life a lot longer. I think she's being unreasonable about you "pulling your weight" considering that you don't live with him. Though you do stay over 6x a week, so you practically do...simplest way to solve that one is to ask your man if he'd like you to do more around the house. Be careful of your tone when you ask this, so you don't come off as accusing.
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/18 10:53 AM
10

I'd love to know some of the details of what was going wrong before and what is better now. I think it will help encourage the newer ladies.
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/18 10:46 AM
2

If this is an issue you both have, why don't you lead in vulnerability and start praising him more often? Vulnerability is a female virtue, and if you husband doesn't see you allowing yourself to be open and vulnerable, he isn't going to take that step, especially if he is naturally more stoic.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 10:10 PM
2

Wow. I think anyone would be exhausted. It doesn't seem like many hours at school, but when you add in the commutes and extra work, that's 16 hours from when you wake up until you get home again! Let's say it takes you an hour to get ready, that's a 15 hour day. That's too long. It sounded like you were doing okay financially before this. If so, I would seriously consider dropping the extra shift for the sake of your relationship! This is going to wear on you, and unless you absolutely need the …
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 09:59 PM
1

I kinda just made it up. Sometimes you don't need to go all-out, ya know?
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/18 03:20 AM
2

Haha, half-nun mode isn't exactly a RPW term. Nun mode is, and is meant to indicate a time of self-reflection, self-development, withdrawal from dating, and focus on discipline. The female equivalent of monk mode. By half-nun mode I mean that you probably don't need to totally withdraw from social stuff completely, because that is part of your issue, but you do need to take a step back from dating and do some character development.
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/18 03:19 AM
6

It sounds like you have a problem of self-worth and a fear of success. You don't know how to handle getting what you want (the right guy) in part because you don't think you deserve it. You may need to take a step back from dating for a little while. Keep meeting people and working on your social skills, but you may need a little half-nun mode. How is your physical appearance? Do you look/feel beautiful? What are your skills/hobbies? Do you draw pride from those? How are your relationships with …
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/18 04:04 PM
4

u/Laceandsilks, this seems star worthy.
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/18 04:41 AM
2

I'd say it's worth it, especially if your teeth are keeping you from smiling. I had braces, and I'm glad I did. Just be careful you don't spend all your school money on them...
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/18 05:53 AM
1

Love Alton Brown! Though occasionally he over complicates reicpes. I really like the food science of it though.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/18 05:51 AM
3

I have a bullet journal! I love it. It keeps me organized and also is a place for me to write about bigger picture stuff. I do use it to write out my goals, be it yearly, monthly, weekly, or daily. I have slacked on this a bit (this is reminding me to start again this week!), but I'll check up on my goals every week to see how I am doing. This weekly self-evaluation is extremely helpful. Hope you enjoy your journal!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/18 05:31 AM
–

A star for the! u/Laceandsilks
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 07:31 PM
3

It is absolutely possible to have a relationship without yelling at each other at all. I am in one. I think in the five years we've been together, there was yelling once. I disagree that women like drama. I know I don't. Maybe some do. Don't take RP too seriously. They have their place, but a lot of the women they target are not exactly the ones you'd bring home to mom and therefore exhibit less than ideal female behavior. I'm sure your behavior has influenced him. Are you getting help for your …
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 05:09 AM
–

I don't think it's truly possible to have equal input. Eventually there's going to be a time when someone disagrees. There should be a leader to avoid conflict. And it should be your husband.
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 03:07 AM
6

Wow, there certainly is a lot to unpack here. That doesn't mean it can't be done, but it's going to take a lot of time and effort on the part of both of you. You can't fix this alone. A couple of questions. Why did he drive himself to the hospital because he was screaming at you? Was he afraid of another sucide attempt? Was he admitted to the hospital? It seems like there are a lot of issues on both sides of this relationship. Both of you have had recent suicide attempts, he was attempting to ch…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 01:54 AM
3

Just take some time for yourself before you get back into the ring and things will turn out fine. It will take a little bit of trust on your part to be vulnerable, but without vulnerability, you'll never get the kind of relationship you crave. Best of luck to you.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/18 08:05 PM
2

It's normal to like the attention. However, you need to take a step back from your emotions in this case and do what you know is best for you in the long term, which is to take a break from male attention.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/18 05:24 PM
4

You are thinking like a RP man. Abundance mentality and indifference are ways of protecting yourself from rejection and appearing aloof, which is more attractive to women. Abundance mentality also displays preselection, which is attractive to women. Aloofness and indifference is not attractive to men. Preselection is not attractive to a man. If you act like a man who's a player, you're probably not gonna catch the kind of guy you want to be with.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/18 05:23 PM
5

Not putting all your eggs in one basket because you "know people very well..." Sounds like your problem is choosing the wrong guys from the start.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/18 05:06 AM
3

First of all, you can stop talking to those other guys. You are choosing not to due to the fear of missing out. This is very unwise. No matter how "emotionally checked out" you might have been during your relationship, you still need some time alone to take a breath, evaluate and process. You will not be able to properly vet without this. If I had to put a number on it, I'd say wait at least two months before dating again. Two weeks after getting out of a relationship puts you in the realm of se…
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/18 05:02 AM
2

One thing that helped me a lot when I worked a stressful job was taking 10 or 15 minutes to myself to decompress after work before going home. Just finding a quiet place for yourself. This will help you shift into the "at home" mindset from the high-powered mindset. If you are both earning well, perhaps you could outsource some of your housework. If you have the money, there's nothing wrong with having a maid come once a week or hiring someone to do a little meal prep. I hesitate to recommend ge…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 11:50 PM
1

u/Laceandsilks, this should get a star
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 03:45 AM
2

u/Laceandsilks, I think this one deserves a star!
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 03:43 AM
1

I think some of this will just pass naturally. A lot of this is simply stress from the upheaval in your life. It's great that you just had sex, and it's okay that you didn't finish. It still broke the sexless pattern. Keep initiating, but don't be nagging or forceful. Is there anything you can do to reduce your exhaustion? Little time savers, like prepping for meals on the weekend, getting groceries delivered, (if you can afford it) hiring a maid to come once a week, packing his lunch for him. M…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 03:41 AM
2

If I had to guess, I'd say you hadn't done much (serious) dating. It's common for girls and women to have Disney prince or Rockstar fantasies when they've never been with a real man. I'm gonna have to echo the other posters and encourage you to find some hobbies. Just keep trying different things until one sticks. You are going to have to invest yourself a little bit, as real hobbies require some effort (that is what makes them so valuable). Try volunteering or if you're religious getting involv…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 03:27 AM
2

This was exactly what came to mind when I read that comment.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 02:45 AM
1

This is why MRAs have never been successful Absolutely agree. They are trying to convince people to go against nature to see men and women as the same. It's simply not possible. Good post. I think both men and women really have to bring their all into a relationship these days, since marriage is 100% voluntary. The only true necessity for it is in raising children, but many people see this as optional too.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 02:43 AM
13

This is so true. My boyfriend was seriously ill and in excruciating pain for two years and handled it with amazing decorum and gratitude. Every once in a while he would snap at me or his mom (his main caretakers) but would quickly apologize. It was a very rare thing too. It made me love him all the more and truly blew me away with his strength.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 02:37 AM
24

Avoid drinking, drugs, and hooking up. Don't have lots of male "friends." Be on the lookout for your future husband.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 02:33 AM
1

Well if you're not going into significant debt and you're getting something out of it, continue on. From what you wrote, I was envisioning an mind-numbing program you'd be paying out the yin-yang for. Hobbies where you may find a good man--rock climbing walls/gyms, regular gym, various volunteer programs like habitat for humanity (I also read of a few people recently who met their husbands through the SPCA), if you can find classes in computer programing, the shooting range, real estate investme…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:21 PM
1

The fact that you are thinking about this when you are so young means you're well on your way to having the life you want. Take a deep breath. First off, especially if you are taking out debt to go to school, I would drop out and go straight to working with children. Your future husband will appreciate your lack of debt going into the relationship. I'm pretty sure you can work at most daycares without a college degree. If not, you absolutely can nanny for a family, and nannies can be paid quite …
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:27 AM
1

Everytime he microwaves stoffers lasagna and I see him make it he thanks the lasana. 😂 Ahhaha that is so cute and so funny. Also--kind of gross having to dig a ring box out of lasagna, but also cute.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 01:51 AM
5

Wow, this is great information. Particularly, as other commentors have said, the marrying age factor. The fact that most college graduates don't consider marrying until 28 and graduate school grads until 30 should make many women think, and is significant evidence for why I recommend dating older men.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 12:41 AM
8

Always happy to hear a success story!
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 11:22 PM
3

I take his feedback for sure, but there are no laws. For example, he doesn't like heels. I have a couple of pairs of 2in (boots and wedges) that he seems to like, but anything else is impractical and I don't think he likes the look of stilettos anyway. He also doesn't like red lipstick. This was one I was disappointed by since it's trendy and I like the 50s housewife look, but when he explained that it just made him think of strippers, I no longer wanted to wear it. For the most part, he just en…
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 07:14 PM
8

This is a great post. I would caution ladies to be at least somewhat explicit about committent though, not demanding but simply asking. In this day and age, things may seem really serious, but sometimes each partner is on a different page. One will think they are exclusive while the other assumes that, if it's not stated, there's still room for dating. The signs of commitment may all be there, but they may not be the whole picture. So when things are feeling serious, just a simple, calm, non-acc…
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 06:06 PM
2

It's well worth the investment! I use mine for bread among other things. I love that you can transition from the stove to the oven.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/18 01:10 AM
10

This sounds amazing! One of my favorites is this braised lamb recipe, and it works great for really tough game too (every meat falls apart after braising for 4 hrs!), and beef or deer stew.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/18 02:55 AM
5

Big boobs are overrated. And this is coming from an A-cup gal who's been with a big-boob lover for 5 years. Even though they are small, he still likes them, and better yet he loves me. I charmed him off the bat with my personality. Although he could tell I was cute, he didn't approach me with the goal of picking me up but of helping me (but that's a story for another day). Bottom line is, if you are thin, dress feminine, and have long hair, men will be attracted to you even if you are flat chest…
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/18 07:38 PM
5

Wow, you put a big smile on my face!!
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 11:06 PM
28

It sounds like you may have been spending some time over at TRP. I don't advise this. So, you've taken the Red Pill. Good for you. It's not easy, is it? However, you're already won the game. You are happily married and pregnant. You can relax knowing you've already secured comittment from a good man. (That doesn't mean "let yourself go," it means calm down). TRP is mostly made up of men looking to spin plates. Many of them see this as the only viable interaction with women in the current sexual …
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 10:58 PM
10

You're so welcome. I wouldn't obsess too much about being "on the decline" by the time you heal. It's something that comes up fairly often around here, how guys at TRP seem to have a hard expiration date for females at 23. However, in reality, "the decline" is much slower than they would lead you to believe (unless you've already been smoking and drinking for 10 years). It really is possible to stay quite attractive into your 30s and even your 40s (and then be attractive in a different way beyon…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 04:43 PM
3

I tend to not bring it up unless asked. People do think I'm weird, but many are still friends with me. Some are not and think I am a brainwashed battered woman. Try to focus on other things, but know you may lose some friends if you are honest :( however if you do, they weren't true friends anyway.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:53 AM
6

Don't be ashamed! I am so glad you got a diagnosis and are on your way to a cure. Focus on your health right now. Seriously. With poor health, your SMV will be low no matter what. Once you are recovering, then worry about your appearance again. You yourself say a lot of it is reversible. I would just be patient and let your body heal itself once the tumor is out. Hold off on surgeries until you give your body a year or so to do some bouncing back. That said, focusing on other areas is great no m…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:48 AM
2

I will second that AskTRP is probably a better place for you. We focus on long term relationship on this sub. But to answer your question, yes women really are that indirect. I can't speak to whether those women wanted to sleep with you right away, but they were likely interested in you, otherwise they wouldn't have made the effort to contact you.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:40 AM
13

Just say something nice and true, like "it's so sweet how thoughtful you are" or "I love how well you treat me." As much as you may be tempted to say "oh I don't need X!" to seem low maintenance, this just invalidates his attempt to show his love for you. Good on you for avoiding this! Better to have a brief awkward moment and then a neutral comment than to make him feel like he can't do anything right.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:36 AM
6

I try to keep everything simple and inexpensive. Hair: wash ~1x a week (it is wavy and takes more than 2 weeks to get greasy even a little) and comb every night. I style it most days or just leave it down. Skin: cleanse using the Oil Cleansing method PM. I go between washing with Cetaphil and moisturizing with skin oil in the AM and simply oil cleansing in the morning. Nails: I keep my toes painted and my fingernails trimmed and unpainted. I can't afford manicures, but I cook so much and I play …
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:28 AM
13

I think many people who don't take care of themselves are depressed. I also think that many people don't realize that taking care of yourself can help you develop self respect and self esteem, which can help alleviate depression. Glad you're doing better.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:21 AM
5

I know honey. It's a bitter pill to swallow. I have to deal with the same thing from supposed friends. My best friend of more than 10 years has sought me out to curse at me multiple times since I've become vocal about my anti-feminist views. They want to destroy you to bring you down to their level. They see that you are happy and have what they don't and think they can't have (or think it's beneath them to have) and want to make you miserable like they are. You are a reminder that there is a be…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 06:23 PM
26

The best advice I have for you is to seriously limit your interactions with these women and find new friends if you can. At this point they are bringing nothing but hate to the table, so why would you keep them around? Let them hate you out of earshot so it doesn't impact you negatively.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 04:24 PM
9

He does. Mostly because the way things play out in family courts for men.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/17 03:14 AM
9

Guys just want to pass out after they come. They also can't read your mind. You could always playfully wink and say "me first" and if he goes for the hand say "with your mouth." You've got to say something, but it doesn't have to be a big long emotional discussion.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/17 11:57 PM
1

It sounds like you just need to keep doing what you've been doing. The only thing that will heal him is time, though the support of a good woman will help. His hesitations about marriage is well-founded and is something I face in my own relationship. Unfortunately I don't have an answer for that.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/17 11:51 PM
24

It sounds like you just need to keep doing what you've been doing. The only thing that will heal him is time, although having the support of a good woman will help. His hesitations about marriage are something I face in my own relationship that I don't really have an answer for.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/17 11:49 PM
1

Yeah, most men and women aren't meant to have the low body fat content that is promoted in the fitness world. I mean, were also not meant to have to high body fat content of 67% of Americans, but lower is not always better. Abs are probably an unrealistic and even unhealthy goal for most people, and you can be extremely fit and still not have them. (For example, even when I was an athelete, I never had a flat stomach, which could drive some women to hysteria.)
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/17 01:08 AM
2

TBH for a long time I've thought fitness communities aren't the best place for women. Being in shape is good, but certain rules of thumb (like "lift or else" or certain calorie or food group restrictions) I don't think work the same for women's bodies. Testosterone makes a really big difference in how your body handles exercise and metabolizes food, as does the fact that, biologically speaking, women's bodies are made for child-rearing. I think a lot of "fitness" imperatives are not geared towar…
/r/RedPillWomen12/12/17 05:08 PM
10

I'm sorry for your experience, and I am no doctor, but your story has eating disorder written all over it. I'm glad you're at a better place and would agree that obsessing over food can be very unhealthy, but I don't think your experience can be generalized. Also, it's probably best to leave the kids out of diets, unless the diet is shifting from fast food to whole foods. People shouldn't "diet," they should eat healthy. There's a difference. Having healthy habits includes not bingeing as well a…
/r/RedPillWomen12/12/17 01:17 AM
2

Be brave and pull the trigger. He doesn't deserve a moment more of your time. Prayer can help you through the pain but it cannot fix him. I'm sorry that this has happened, but take this as a learning experience to have better relationships in the future. Make sure you take several months away from dating for self-reflection and healing.
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/17 02:46 AM
1

I know what you mean. I don't have kids, but I am way too nice to be a disciplinarian. I think you kind of need a good cop & a bad cop :P
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 11:57 PM
2

Glad you came to your senses! Feelings matter, but expecting love at first sight is unrealistic.
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 04:45 PM
2

Wow, I couldn't have said it better myself!
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 04:15 PM
7

It's very difficult to not repeat the example your parents set, especially when society does not support healthy gender roles. I feel lucky to have discovered RPW. Even though I had already set off on the road to submission in my relationship, I didn't have any framework for understanding my experience and improving outcomes. Stuff like moderating the tone of your voice I would have never thought of, but it's so effective!
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 07:18 PM
6

Absolutely! Having parents set a good example of a loving relationship is a gift.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 06:55 PM
2

Yes, men and women are both absolutely crucial.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 06:51 PM
2

I agree with those priorities, for sure. My parents were in the same page with decision making and my dad did lead, but my mom ventured too much into shrew territory and was not very feminine in many ways. Among other things this led me to being a confused tomboy who was not able to surrender or encourage leadership in my past relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 06:44 PM
2

Congratulations on your success! It makes me happy to hear it.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 04:19 PM
2

Agreed! Men do appreciate helpful women. They don't appreciate nags.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 04:19 PM
5

He sounds pretty immature and afraid of committent. That being said, he is 21, and in this day and age that's typical. It's very level-headed of him to express that he's not ready to make that kind of commitment, but you should take that as a sign and leave with your dignity. He's made it clear that he's not willing to meet you halfway and that this isn't serious to him. You clearly want something serious. You're only going to get hurt more if you stay. Sorry you're going through this ♥️
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 04:03 PM
2

I would definitely reserve the more petty gripes for your girlfriends. Most women aren't bothered when their friends call to complain, and while men might not be bothered, they see a complaint as a problem they should try to solve. That means it is just one more thing that they have to take care of. That being said, I don't think you screwed up last night. You were really upset, even though it was just over hair, so it's fine to express it to him as long as you weren't wailing and gnashing your …
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 03:53 PM
2

Re-posted to correct for grammar! Sorry :P
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 03:45 PM
2

Very worth saying. "Red pilled" is just a level of understanding, and many people operate in the world for their entire lives completely oblivious to this knowledge. Whether that's good or bad is another question. In many cases, it's better for a woman to find a non-RP-aware man in that there's a good chance he would shy away from marriage. TRP flies in the face of the morality codes of many, many groups of people. That doesn't make it less true (why do you think those morality codes came about …
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/17 12:49 AM
8

u/LaceandSilks said it well. In the case of my sister, she expressed that she would not even consider a guy unless he gave her the reaction that one guy who she talked to one time gave her a year ago: "a full body reaction, feeling like we'd been friends forever." She also described him as very attractive. She never even went on a date with him, yet he's now the standard by which she measures all other men. In her case it's bad because it was such an intense and unusual reaction that there's a c…
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/17 07:52 PM
6

My sister (28) also makes her romantic decisions based on tingles and then wonders why she's been single for 3 years.
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/17 04:53 PM
6

Good for you! I love hearing little success stories like this about how RP concepts can change your life in small but significant ways.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/17 01:25 AM
2

Haha if they say something, just tell them you are trying to work on your verbal filter.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 08:02 PM
3

Good luck to you! Be brave. I'm sorry, but that is not what "for better or for worse means." That's supposed to cover things like financial hardship, loss of a loved one, illness...
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 03:14 PM
5

You might also want to ask your clergy person or justice of the peace if he or she defines "for better or for worse" as "husband gets to put his penis in whatever hole is available." Lol, definitely. I have a guess I know the answer, but it's good to hear it from a religious or legal authority.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 03:12 PM
2

This is great advice. Being honest and firm but not mean is the best, most mature way of handling things and provides a much cleaner break.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 04:23 AM
5

Don't make excuses. You don't need to give a reason. I like to smile and say something like "Thanks, but I'm not interested." Or "I'm flattered, but no thank you." This way a guy can walk away with dignity and it's not a completely awkward interaction. Edit: ghosting someone is not classy or mature. I'll admit, I've never dated online so it's perhaps a different world, but cutting things off directly is, while harder at first, much better.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 04:21 AM
2

Practice when you're not upset. Try hanging out with your friends and not saying anything until someone asks you a direct question. Once you get used to controlling yourself in this environment, it will carry over into more heated situations.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 04:12 AM
11

I do often want to help people with red pill advice. However, I almost never do. Most people don't want unsolicited advice, red pill or otherwise. If a friend specifically asks for your advice, I'd give an honest opinion. If they keep complaining about a problem, perhaps you can give the tiniest grain of RP truth and see how they react. If something seems to click, push a little further, but if they get angry, just drop it.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/17 01:33 AM
5

It's good that you talk regularly and have good interactions when you hang out, but the same red flags stand. He seems like he might be emotionally stunted and is making excuses rather than pushing forward.
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/17 01:29 AM
2

Good luck to you :)
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/17 12:43 AM
3

I understand. It sounds like your problem is holding on for too long, not letting go too soon. It sounds like you have good gut instincts to guide you, but perhaps you keep ignoring them in hopes that a guy will prove you wrong. I'd say cut them off sooner. If your instincts are telling you something is wrong, give him one more chance and if you still have that nagging feeling, cut it off.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 11:06 PM
11

So lemme get this straight: -He hasn't had sex in 13 yrs -wont have sex outside committed relationship but hasn't slept with you after 4 years -hasn't tried to follow through with marriage -saw you only 2x a year for two years Something is wrong with this picture. Again, I'm glad you haven't slept with this guy, but a man of his age should be less committent shy and definitely should still have some kind of sex drive. Especially if you're waiting for marriage to have sex, he should be a lot more…
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 10:56 PM
3

Hmm, there is a chance he was waiting for you to cave, but if that was the case, is that the kind of guy you'd want to marry?
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 08:02 PM
3

Well a bad temper is a definite red flag that you should pay attention to. You should definitely make it clear in the first few dates (maybe date 2 or 3) that you're interested in a relationship. Make it soon enough that you don't waste anyone's time but not so soon that you come off as desperate.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 08:00 PM
41

This is an enormous breach of trust on his part, not the mention a violation of you marriage vows. This is not something you agreed to in your relationship and he led you to marriage based on false pretenses. He is also putting you at risk by exposing you to all those sexual partners. This is not an "adventurous spirit," this is flippant and dedicated infidelity. Were you having sex with him before you discovered this behavior? Were there any problems in your relationship before this discovery? …
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 07:34 PM
18

This situation is full of red flags. It doesn't sound like you are in a relationship at all. (He made you move out of state and then "allowed you" to see him 4x in two years??) It's good that you haven't had sex, although I am very confused as to what either of you are getting out of this "relationship." I extremely doubt that he's going to marry you. 4 years is a very long time to be playing games like this. Move on.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 07:21 PM
2

It seems like part of your problem is waiting for them to "offer" committent when, as the woman, it's your job to ask for it, particularly before things get sexual. It seems like part of the issue is not establishing firm boundaries so that there's no level of accountability on either side.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 07:09 PM
4

What exactly is it about these guys that makes them seem untrustworthy or like they are dating around? Especially since you discover that many end up wanting relationships, what are they doing that makes you think they are players? Your description is very vague, so it's hard to tell what's going on. Side note, it's more typical for RPW to ask for committent, as we tend to operate on the "women are the gatekeepers of sex and men are the gatekeepers of commitment" model.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/17 07:05 PM
2

Great! Yes, men are men after all, not little boys, and often like to be left alone with their emotions.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/17 08:51 PM
2

I'm guessing that by the time you read this post the situation will have already resolved itself. The best thing you can do is give him space. He is not mad at you. He is frustrated with himself. Trying to make him feel better will just call attention to what he probably sees as a failure (not being able to assemble a piece of furniture for his wife for her birthday). Hopefully he is mature enough to not dwell on this too long and will try to tackle it again soon. If he is still moody after a co…
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/17 08:37 AM
2

Good question! Well, these days it's a pretty DIY endeavor. Read the sidebar here, look at Miss Manners letters (especially under etiquette and ethics), take care that your appearance is presentable and your posture is good, make sure you don't curse in public and say things like "please" and "thank you." I don't really know of a place you can get official training. Usually experience with grandma (or someone else's grandma) is good training, simply by watching how they act, since these women co…
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/17 04:28 AM
3

I don't think I participated in too many shit tests TBH (not tooting my own horn, but I have been noted by exes for my lack of bitchiness). It was more that he would never take charge and his lack of confidence didn't build attraction. I also had no clue how to encourage him to lead, but I did treat him pretty darn well and was nice to him. Honestly I thought that relationship was going to end in marriage despite the lack of fireworks because we got along really well.
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/17 02:47 AM
4

this is what used to be called "well bred" Exactly. A decent woman (which was the majority) had to be refined and competent enough that she could function socially, as a wife, and as a mother with some sense of grace. This took training and practice, not degrees and high IQ.
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/17 07:58 PM
3

It came to me pretty naturally after years of cooking (particularly using whole chickens). It does take a solid stomach though!
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/17 02:37 AM
3

We've been out together a few times. It was a very cool couples bonding activity when I helped him butcher a deer a couple of years ago.
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/17 12:59 AM
5

Well, I accidentally shot at a chipmunk when hunting squirrels once and he made fun of me mercilessly, but I don't think that's a relationship issue. Don't worry, ladies. I missed.
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/17 11:46 PM
1

Accepting my femnininity was the most liberating thing for me. Me. Too!
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/17 05:27 PM
6

which one is more important Neither. It's the yin/yang concept. They are not equal because they different, but they are both equally important. Masculinity might built space shuttles and invent plastic, but without femininity, most men wouldn't bother (due to lack of inspiration to be great from a wife and children) or would be so busy with keeping themselves fed and clothed that they wouldn't have time to do anything cool. Men build society, and women run it behind the scenes, or are the prize …
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/17 04:29 PM
13

But I would always try to make myself seem suppperrr smart Yeah, one day it dawned on me that [smart] men do often Iike smart women, but they don't want to feel emasculated by them. You can be smart without being competitive about it. The last thing a man wants is to compete with a woman because it's lose/lose: if you win you're a jerk and if you lose you're weak.
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/17 04:08 PM
2

Too bad I didn't discover RP a few years earlier!! Hmm...how my life would probably be different... I was pretty heavily BP when I got into my relationship (as was my SO), and we both got red-pilled by our college experience and transformed somewhat together. I wonder if we would be together if I'd discovered it before meeting him? I certainly wouldn't have had blue hair when he met me :D
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/17 04:04 AM
5

My standards are in the home/with SO vs. out of the home. I dress pretty conservatively for the public and think any sexy clothing should be reserved for him. I think if I were single I would save my sexy stuff for after we were in a committed relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/17 11:47 PM
11

Probably the female tendency toward hypergamy and the need for men to pass sh*t tests. It immediately explained why past relationships failed to have that "spark" or "chemistry." It was because I felt stronger/braver/whatever-er than my man. It also made it very clear why I am so attracted to my SO.
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/17 10:12 PM
3

It's a lovely warm memory in my mind: it was windy outside and probably in the 30s or low 40s. The sun was down by 4PM. But then my friends and I stepped inside this little coffee shop that was simply glowing with warm yellow light, and we stopped for a cup of coffee and amazing blueberry pie with cream. There were several cozy nooks to sit in, books to read and board games. It was lovely. There were other examples, but that was an unforgettable distillation of hyyge that makes me want to bring …
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/17 01:11 AM
7

I give my man frequent head and back scratches as well as massages. Soothes him better than most words.
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/17 12:08 AM
6

I like posting here because I feel I can share my experience to help other women improve their relationships. I went around the pot to find the handle in just about every way in my relationship and with my femnininity, so I hope to help others avoid the blunders I made. I like reading posts here because it reminds me to watch my behavior. I'd love to see more posts about homemaking!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 07:33 PM
2

Glad to hear it :)
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 06:38 PM
3

Oh, I love Ludovico Einaudi!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 06:01 PM
2

Love the Polaroid idea!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 05:56 PM
1

Those are some great ideas! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 05:54 PM
2

Ooh yay! I'm so glad you posted this. I love the concept of hyyge and was lucky enough to experience it in Scandanavia. I'd love to capture some of that for my own home. My first instinct is always to make lots of warm, stick-to-your ribs food and to bake. Turning the oven on keeps the house warm, and everyone likes to congregate over a warm bowl of stew or a hot cookie! I definitely need help in the interior decorating department. Putting away spring and summer items for less clutter is a good …
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 05:25 PM
2

Welcome to RPW! It sounds like you have a wonderful personality and make friends easily, which is a huge help. It also sounds like you pay attention to your appearance, which is good. However, I feel the need to gently point out that your guy friends aren't dating friends that are "equally attractive" to you. No matter how pretty you are, the wheelchair and illness will be an impediment to many. The idea of "not being able to see past the chair" is a blue pill thought pattern much akin to Nice G…
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 05:17 PM
5

You should write a post about your journey. Nothing's more inspiring than a transformation story!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 05:06 PM
2

Yeah, in retrospect it could have been good to write anonymously. Started the book 3 years ago...I didn't realize the world would be as contentious as it has become. At any rate, good for you for getting off social media.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 04:00 AM
2

Oooh, fancy! Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 03:12 AM
2

It definitely requires a specific nuance. And I'm sure some of the things I've said on Facebook/messenger aren't things I'd say in person, even though I try really hard to not get emotional with people if I do engage. Mostly though it's people saying things to me they'd never say in person...which isn't too nice, but I ask for it by engaging in RP topics on social media. I do worry about doxing in the future, though I'm not sure if you can even call it that if you are writing in your own name.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 03:10 AM
4

Wow, congratulations on your transformation!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 12:45 AM
2

Off-topic, but how did you link that exchange?
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 12:28 AM
6

I love the suggestions of taking walks and getting a constructive hobby. Learning a musical instrument (depending on the instrument can be pretty low cost, and there are videos on YouTube) is a great feminine hobby. Or learning to bake, painting...do something that expresses your emotional life. If you want a more interesting life, do something interesting. Being able to bring beauty into the world will make you feel more attractive as a person :)
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/17 12:22 AM
3

I have been debating this recently. I run a blog in my real name and am planning on publishing a book soon, one that could be considered RP (but honestly not too extreme) and I'm having to figure out how to balance publicity and my own and my family's safety. I think I lean pretty heavily on social media when I'm particularly anxious at times, and sometimes it makes me feel better, sometimes it makes me feel worse...
/r/RedPillWomen11/11/17 11:56 PM
2

Hon, it does sound like you're a plate, but that doesn't mean there's nothing you can do. I'd let him know that you're concerned about STDs and perhaps say you are only comfortable not using a condom in an exclusive relationship. This lets him know clearly how you feel without making ultimatums. See how he reacts. If he starts making excuses, move on, because he doesn't care enough about your well-being and isn't going to make you his one and only. If he says okay and opens up the conversation, …
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/17 04:01 PM
3

I understand now. By doing that she'd be allowing him to step up or wriggle away.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/17 03:50 PM
2

Practice in LOW INVESTMENT situations That's how I did it. Don't try to take down the whale at your first go.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/17 04:55 AM
2

I think you mean circumcised? And he is... Also... Sleeping bags?
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/17 05:53 PM
2

Such a shame :'(. I mourn for your country.
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/17 05:52 PM
2

Great advice about the subtly of the flow of a relationship or courtship. As RPW we need to be highly aware of how we signal to a potential or our current man. Weirdly though my man won't let me give him a bj to completion most of the time, despite my enthusiasm and the fact that he says I'm good at it...I've been trying to figure this out through a RP lense and I think it is about power. I feel powerful when I control his orgasm, and he feels powerful being able to control his, especially when …
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/17 05:19 AM
2

I know you're a mod, but I feel the need to point out that he is not her captain in this situation since they are not in a formal/exclusive relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen06/11/17 07:59 PM
1

Yes, of course. I was being sarcastic because it's such a horrifying, obvious issue to anyone paying attention. It's what we're trying to prevent in the US.
/r/RedPillWomen06/11/17 07:40 PM
4

I agree totally that when you're young it's very hard to establish boundaries and know when they are necessary. I hope articles like this reach younger women so they don't feel like their only option is to cave to sexual pressure.
/r/RedPillWomen06/11/17 05:48 AM
3

Welp I posted my comment before reading this...we are on the same page.
/r/RedPillWomen01/11/17 03:38 AM
4

"How to Catch a Slave"
/r/RedPillWomen01/11/17 03:36 AM
8

I applaud Mike Pence's policy and was happy back when he spoke about it. It is more or less my own policy and should be that of anyone who is not naive about sexual dynamics. If you are attractive and have a pulse, you're going to want to get it on with someone who isn't your spouse/partner from time to time, but it is your job to make sure that you never put yourself in a situation where someone could fall prey to their baser desires. To me this is a huge factor in terms of building trust in a …
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/17 04:58 AM
3

This is great advice.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 10:43 AM
2

I'm gonna leave this one to the pros, but I wanted to make it clear that you're not pissing anyone off for asking for advice. That's what this sub is for. I also don't think at all that it's 100% your fault, but there may be things you can do to help.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 10:26 AM
5

You constantly crack me up
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 08:35 AM
4

sending intruders back Hmm, German lady wants to expel intruders to prevent rape... whoever could she be talking about? Hard to say. The world may never know.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 08:24 AM
24

Take a deep breath. You are married. He needs to blow off steam, but he will come back. You clearly hit a nerve with him. It sounds like you have been a great support system for him in the past and perhaps in a way no one else in his life has been (parents, friends). He took a bid for your approval by deciding to try to make something that was important to you, and you laughed in his face and told him it was impossible. To him this translates as "I have no faith in you. You are ridiculous to me.…
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 05:39 AM
1

It's all about context. When I was teaching and speaking to a classroom of highschoolers (tough crowd, let me tell ya) I would lower my voice and speak in short, authoritative bursts. When I am trying to be cute when speaking to my boyfriend, I soften and raise my voice.
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/17 12:24 PM
2

Excellent post. I was just thinking about this recently.
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/17 12:16 PM
2

And let's be clear, this is the best thing for the child. Seconded. This is extremely important to realize.
/r/RedPillWomen20/10/17 03:50 AM
1

Yes. This. All this.
/r/RedPillWomen20/10/17 03:40 AM
1

I think we're getting into a chicken or the egg situation here, haha! Sounds like we agree.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 02:21 PM
3

BTW, "read the sidebar" isn't meant to be dismissive. There's just a lot of great stuff over there. I'd recommend 7 Habits of a Highly Effective Shrew, How to Be A Good First Mate. and What to Do When Your Captain Won't Lead for starters. It seems like you're already doing a good job trying to understand this stuff, but it can be a lot to take in!
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 02:20 PM
2

I'll go hash out whatever I think is wrong with a friend of mine. Whoa. Mind blown. Good idea.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 02:13 PM
3

Agree. I think sometimes religious leaders are better than trained professionals. They are also more likely to be red pilled (in the old fashioned sense of trying to uphold family values, community, etc) so are less likely to give you BP advice that many (not all) psychologists have been trained in.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 02:06 PM
1

Read my original comment for my suggestions. Basically apply RPW concepts. It's possible it won't work and that he really is mentally ill, but it's also possible he's just been in a bad situation for a long time and she has just not been very strategic about how she helps him. She mentions nagging him to open up, for example, which shows that her "helping" might have made things worse. I'm not saying it's her fault, but I am saying that a different approach (RPW) might work better. I pointed her…
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 02:00 PM
1

Sure, I get that. But if he is established in a career and has a bad relationship with the mother of his child, he's probably going to stay depressed. They are both important.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 01:56 PM
3

Also: He is currently in college and he feels that once he establishes a career he will feel much happier. He is probably wrong about this...another RP truth is that happiness comes from a loving family, not from a great career (which most people aren't lucky enough to have). We usually talk about this from the female perspective here, but it's still true for men. A job or career is a means to an end.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 01:16 PM
3

I'll tell you why that is. There is a big difference between feeling depressed (very real and problematic) and having Major Depression (or Seasonal Affective Disorder, or any other related illness) or feeling anxious (very real and problematic) and having General Anxiety Disorder (or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or any other related illness). The point of mental illness is that it is not a normal emotional/logical response to the situation. It is normal to feel depressed if your life is sh**. …
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 01:11 PM
6

Do you really want to have a baby with him? She is already pregnant. That ship has sailed... He has a mental illness I'm not 100% sure he does. I say this as someone with a mental illness. In the land of RP, we see that things like depression and anxiety are often linked to the stark reality of someone's situation and can be vastly improved when that situation changes. I don't claim to know this person or be a doctor, but to simply write someone off by saying "they have a mental illness, there's…
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 12:47 PM
14

I, too, hope that having a child/family will inspire him be careful with how you phrase that...your behavioral changes are what will inspire him, not the cold hard facts of being a father. Make sure you don't use the child as a bargaining chip or a tool to shame him. Please please please stick around. This stuff works! My god does it work. It isn't easy, but it works.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 12:44 PM
2

Lol! Preach.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 12:29 PM
14

Holy wow, what a mess. I'm glad you posted. Welcome to RPW. First off, what do BD and BM stand for? Baby Daddy and...? I am confused about the details of the situation since I don't know these abbreviations. We will be living together as coparents but I have told him strictly no sex. Alright, before I give you advice, let's be clear--you're not broken up. If you are still living together and "co-parenting," but you're not having sex, you're just in a dysfunctional, unpleasant relationship. In li…
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 12:15 PM
3

That's spot on...stop reading my mind! Haha thanks.
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/17 08:06 PM
2

Wow, that linked article is really helpful! Admittedly my sense of decor and homemaking can leave something to be desired, and I appreciate advice on this subject.
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/17 01:59 PM
3

I'm late to the game, but if you have the time, I'd love a reading! What can I do about my sleep, if anything?
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/17 01:39 PM
6

I would absolutely get a prenup. I've heard it referred to in RP land as marriage insurance, and I think that's the best way of putting it. If you had a 50% chance of breaking your leg as a bull rider, and you were able to get insurance (health, disability), wouldn't you be crazy not to? There's a ~50% divorce rate in the US. You'd be crazy not to make legally binding provisions when everyone is amicable and clear-headed. I've heard some pretty BP reactions from my parents too, but let's be hone…
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/17 11:49 AM
2

So true. We build each other up, just as it should be.
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/17 05:44 PM
3

I want the burger with bacon!! Haha me too! Not that I would turn down the salad...as an appetizer. Yeah, I guess I'm fairly tall and thin and sort of come off as artsy or a hipster, so I think that's what does it.
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/17 05:42 PM
5

he said if I found someone better, he'd understand. I laughed internally because there's no way I would find anyone better than him This! This is me. My boyfriend and I have had this conversation several times (he's been quite ill for a couple of years and was worried he was holding me back, plus we've had to bed long distance for a year due to health issues on my end) and I keep insisting that I'm willing to wait it out because we rock together...good thing too cuz he's getting a lot better! As…
/r/RedPillWomen16/10/17 07:25 PM
5

assuming my dietary preferences It's very strange, but I have had at least half a dozen people assume I'm a vegetarian over the years... I'm a hunter. My BF never did, but his dad thought this for a whole year. Which is bizzare since I cook meat for them all the time. I'm off topic, but it's just such a strange thing to do.
/r/RedPillWomen16/10/17 07:20 PM
3

I don't know what to tell you except to be brave and don't agree to polyamoury.
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 05:50 PM
2

18 I felt old and useless Now that I'm dying You're being ridiculous. Yes, the Wall is real, but you're a long ways from dying. This self esteem thing can be improved, but a good partner should increase that, not make it worse. You're setting yourself up for failure by assuming you are low value (or that your value cannot change for the better).
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 05:15 PM
2

Also, again, it doesn't sound like you're mediocre, not these days really. "Good" is no longer the norm. Try working on some hobbies. Learning a skill and some discipline will help your self esteem.
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 04:47 PM
3

I'm not anything of what he wanted This is your hurt feelings talking. Clearly he cares about you because he chose you for a relationship, but he does not have realistic expectations. I'm of the opinion that polyamoury does not work. Yeah, maybe there's the 1 in a million couple who pull it off, but they are the abberations, not the norm. You can have a guy that spins plates or a chick who hooks up with guys, but to what end? Again, most of these people fizzle out and ultimately want something m…
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 04:46 PM
4

Is it bad that when I read "toothpaste fights" I thought she meant throwing globs of toothpaste at one another? I guess my SO and I just use the same method. The tidy one :P
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 04:36 PM
3

Yeah for sure. I tried being "the cool girl" (what they're calling a RPW) for years and it backfired magnificently.
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 04:34 PM
3

It sounds like you might have some self esteem issues, saying things like you're mediocre and that you'd never leave. And if you were exclusive but suddenly after his change in circumstance he is pressing for an open relationship... he's trying to take advantage of that. You two have been monogamous, and he said he was okay with that, right? As in, you discussed it and established that officially? If you truly are "mediocre" (which a 7 isn't in terms of looks btw), there is a lot you can do to i…
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 01:38 PM
10

God I know! You said it lady. I am a writer about to publish a book that chronicles the beginning of my red pilling process (I don't frame it that way, but that's what it was), and I want to keep writing RP material as I build a career for myself. I'm currently trying to navigate that while so many women are gaining followings for saying right wing stuff with their boobs out. I'm trying to change the minds of women, bring RPW to the wider public, not gain a bunch of thirsty orbiters...I want cul…
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 06:00 AM
8

Yeah, I have mixed feelings on Lauren Southern. I like a lot of things she says, but she's still not traditional enough for me. And I do agree that she seems to be collecting orbiters en masse, and that's not how you change female culture.
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 05:34 AM
13

The lady described is definitely not a RPW. It's funny though that they mention Gone Girl. A friend threw that book at me tonight at my post which I'd put on my blog. Apparently Gone Girl is now relationship advice but ancient, cross-cultural wisdom is not.
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/17 05:31 AM
0

I am missing something...you seem to have deleted all relevant information on your situation from your post. Maybe you have already gotten enough advice, but if not you're going to have to give us more than a title to go on.
/r/RedPillWomen13/10/17 10:50 PM
2

I love Jordan Peterson! I fully (well, mostly) embrace my views on social media. But that wasn't until quite a while spent on testing the waters with people in person. No one except my SO and parents have agreed with me so far, but I guess my friends respect me enough to talk about it. However, I am a writer, and my opinions are my product. If you are afraid of losing a job because of this, I'd keep it under wraps. If not, I'd speak my mind. The only way to get these ideas to spread is to endors…
/r/RedPillWomen13/10/17 10:42 PM
3

Unless I'm not really that sick, my boyfriend does not try to initiate when I'm such. He can tell when I feel like crap and I doubt I'm sending sexy signals. Also he is perfectly fine with leftovers (he encourages them so we don't have to cook so often). I would be mad if I were you. Is there some other reason he might be feeling impatient? Stress at work or something? You say you haven't been neglecting him in general... You should get a pass for being sick.
/r/RedPillWomen13/10/17 10:12 PM
1

Yep, it's a whole life process, way more than "neg girls to get laid" and "stay skinny to make him happy." I've had to confront literally everything I believed in, but it's made my life a lot better and my vision of what I want clearer.
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/17 11:36 PM
2

Haha yeah that's what I was getting at. I'd love that too. But honestly, if I'm getting enough sex and affection and can tell he's still into me, I don't mind if my SO looks at porn. Better than him wanting to cheat, and as long as he's not spending all his time fapping and he still gets hard for me, we have no problems. I'm glad you seemed to have figured it out. If you've gone on autopilot, it's easy to get dissatisfied, but as long as you talked about it and both make an effort, you can get t…
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/17 11:33 PM
1

I know you updated and said you felt better about the situation, but I'm trying to figure out if you should. Maybe it's because so many of the comments were removed from "guy here" commenters that I didn't get a clear picture. I'd like to ask a few questions to get a handle on the situation: How often do you have sex? How often does he watch porn? Are you upset because you're not getting as much sex or attention as you need? Or is it because he is not exclusively using you as a sexual outlet? Th…
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/17 10:35 PM
1

Ah, yes...borderlines are such a treat. Yeah, sometimes being right next to family isn't always best.
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/17 01:26 AM
2

It's funny because it's true...that sounds like a great plan though. That'll give you plenty of time to grow.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 11:44 PM
1

Don't be too hard on yourself. You are young and no one taught you any better. Better you learn now than when you're 35 with as many notches as years lived and can't find anyone to settle down with.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 10:56 PM
2

Based on everything you've said, that was the first thing I thought.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 10:35 PM
2

You're welcome! You'll learn the difference.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 10:35 PM
5

Southeast Asia is a common place for sex tourism.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 03:49 PM
3

This isn't your hamster spinning. This is your self-protective instinct kicking in. You should try to take note of the difference and get this guy out of your life. The hamster is a metaphor for overthinking and emotionally reacting for no good reason or trying to justify bad behavior. Your instincts are there to keep you out of dangerous/hurtful situations. To tell the difference, ask yourself a few questions: Why am I upset? Did someone take actions to hurt me? Have I done anything to create t…
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 03:47 PM
3

basically a traitor to your race Agreed. Despite how desperate it may seem, I still feel it's my duty to strive for better. I've found a lot of my liberal friends are more open to talking about this stuff with me than expected. However, it has to be in person (ideally 1 on 1 or in a small group) or in direct message. Even though I've been talked down to plenty, I have gotten far more reasonable responses than I expected when posting about this stuff openly like I have been the past few weeks. If…
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 04:02 AM
3

Yes, you are right in that there does have to be proof, and a narcissist would be a tricky case. However, I'd wager that this was less of an issue in the past when it was more common for people to stay in communities their whole lives and had to prove their character over decades rather than just swooping in and charming the pants off a bunch of strangers. In the past being charming wasn't necessarily a virtue (there are some interesting points on this in Susan Cain's book "Quiet") I'm not sayin…
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 03:56 AM
4

Yeah I agree. Stuff happens and we gain weight sometimes, but don't make yourself a wretch of a person while you're at it.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/17 12:57 AM
2

Quality post! It's substantial, so it took me awhile to get around to it.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 10:47 PM
2

Haha exactly!
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 10:46 PM
7

And the RP example sounds a lot more like what I imagine my life will look like if I have kids. Except the leggings part :P. I'm prejudiced against leggings as pants.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 10:34 PM
3

Your BP example sounds exactly like my BF's sister. Exactly. What I dislike most about her situation is how ugly she is to her husband and how she lets her daughter get away with anything (TBD about her son, but if history repeats itself, she's going to be a lot harder on him). It's one thing to let yourself go but it's a whole 'nother ball game to crap on your closest relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 10:34 PM
14

Haha very funny way of putting it. I agree that there is no feasible middle ground role model for moms these days. It's either "run five miles a day, eat Paleo, kids in designer clothing, wear heels while you vacuum" or "gain 50 lbs, wear nothing but yoga pants and t-shirts covered in spit-up, feed the kids McDonald's in the car." It's a crazy dichotomy, and neither is very appealing.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 09:06 PM
5

I don't intend to reduce a woman to that. What I am saying is that those things have been taken off the table in terms of expectations. Now the function of a marriage is mostly for companionship, whereas in the past there were many more practical incentives for both parties (getting those basic needs met). Now, men are generally still expected to hold down a job and work on the house, but a lot of the typical wifely duties are seen as optional/to be shared with the partner. I understand things h…
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 05:41 PM
4

I can't say I've spent much time on any of those subs. TBH they don't at all support the spirit of harmony and cooperation I'd like to see in men and women again. I want to rebuild the foundation, not move to a trailer park.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 03:22 PM
9

I laid on top of him on the bed while he recovered So sweet! And you're right. Nothing can match the depth of time and commitment.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 04:44 AM
12

Agreed. And people forget how much easier it is to build yourself up with the help of a loving, conscientious SO than it is by yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 03:12 AM
7

Trapping some women (and men) into horribly abusive relationships This is why I linked the "no fault" divorce laws page. Divorce was possible before these laws in cases of abuse, infertility, or breech or marriage contract (i.e. husband drinking instead of going to work). It's a common misconception that there was no divorce before no-fault divorce. Ouf! Sorry for the suuuuper long reply Haha no big deal. I'm glad it provoked so many thoughts.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 03:11 AM
3

A point that's missing from your post is sex bots Yeah, I was thinking about those as I wrote this. Good input.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 03:03 AM
2

It's not about hours, it's a about emotional investment I think this is the critical realization here. It has nothing to do with working hard but everything to do with the soul-sucking power of most full time employment. It's nice when one partner can lift the other up instead of both struggling to stay energetic and positive. Glad your perspective widened, and I hope it'll help you in the future!
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/17 04:28 PM
6

Haha I know what you mean! My man has thinning hair and a bit of a belly 5'8" maybe 5'9", but I can't get enough of him.
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/17 04:33 AM
2

Yeah, I see your point.
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/17 05:56 PM
5

Maybe you haven't met many ivy league grads or self-made millionaires ;). I have met a few of both types, and they are of a different ilk. They usually see the world in different ways. They have different views on the value of institutions, public opinions of them, pedigrees, conformity, finances, authority. This is a small detail, but of all the self-made millionaires I know, I don't think a single one wears a suit or drives a fancy car.
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/17 05:14 PM
5

Self made millionaire. It's not even about the money (as far as I know, and ivy league grad usually has pretty good choices for employment). It shows a type of drive and creativity that is what you want to see in a captain. Not that Ivy League grads are shabby, but you basically get into that position by following the rules super hard your whole life, and that can be a rude awakening upon graduation. Edit: that being said, I am dating a man with a master's degree, but he has a lot of the qualiti…
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/17 05:10 PM
8

Congratulations! A lot of this stuff truly isn't rocket science, but it sure does take committent!
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/17 05:07 PM
3

Seconded. All of this. One of the biggest mistakes I see with my peers and younger people is reading WAY too much into texts. Accessibility is at an all-time high while patience and etiquette are at an all time low. That doesn't mean he doesn't like you; it means he's typical for his age. Take a breath. Step away from the phone. Wait a day, then send him a short text about specific plans you'd like to make. He may just be really busy and didn't have time to respond.
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/17 03:40 PM
31

My favorite: If you can't handle me at my worst..
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/17 03:17 PM
3

Exactly.
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/17 08:14 PM
3

I'm gonna second that you read the sidebar, but even so it's good to have real-life examples. What is it like? Pretty darn good. We are not perfect because we are human, but on the whole it is very harmonious. How do you feel when you are with your Captain? Comfortable, impressed, entertained, sometimes excited. Is it fun? Do you ever get tired or bored around your Captain? Yeah, it's definitely fun. He's introduced me to many new activities and brought me on adventures I would have never gone o…
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/17 08:08 PM
1

After scouring r/SkincareAddiction, and trying many things, I finally came round to using the Oil Cleansing method. It helped me resolve some major acne issues, it keeps my face moisturized, and makes my skin heal at least 2x as fast if I do get a breakout. Plus it's a one-step routine that is inexpensive. I use a mixture of baby oil and tea tree oil, plus a couple other things for scent. PM me if you want the recipe! It's worked wonders for my skin. I went from acne all over my cheeks to gettin…
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/17 04:28 AM
2

Seconded.
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/17 04:25 AM
13

You could say I am friends with my SO, however I hesitate to call it friendship, because it's a much deeper bond due to physical intimacy and the nature of romantic partnership. It's like a lifelong friend from the military, lover, and number one advocate all in one. There's something about serious relationships/marriage where you put your spouse/SO before anyone else, even family, and become a team that makes it something more than friendship. However, we are friends in the sense that we have m…
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/17 12:49 AM
2

I was in your situation for a year and a half. I had a mental breakdown. Don't be like me. It's normal to get frustrated when he can't support you the way you need to be supported (especially sex, since no one else can give that to you). This is a time to reach out to the other people in your support network and to be extra vigilant about taking care of yourself. Hang out with friends, call your mom, and if you need to, see a therapist (I'm not a big fan of therapy, but if you don't have a suppo…
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/17 09:57 PM
2

I wouldn't worry about this too much in high school. It's a great time for self-discovery, and if you happen to find a good relationship (which many people don't), that's just a bonus. Focus on self improvement. Keep experimenting with clothes and makeup, work on your conversational skills (making sure to be pleasant, interesting, and not vulgar), learn to cook, eat healthy, and practice a hobby or skill. Once you graduate, you will be far ahead of the curve. Keep approaching guys, not with the …
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/17 09:48 PM
1

Highschool is a weird place where your social status is basically pre-determined and it's really hard to escape that. Exactly! People adhere very strictly to cliques, so even if a guy did like you, he probably wouldn't venture out of his clique to date you (unless he were a super confident player type).
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/17 09:45 PM
1

If he was with a petite woman would he be staring down busty women with flared hips? Probably, quite honestly. Men crave sexual variety. Every last one of them. Even if it were a woman who looked exactly like you, it would still be someone else, which is the point. Don't take this personally at all. It can be hard to come to terms with at first, but remember, he chose you and is choosing you every day that he doesn't make moves on another woman. both on his phone and public When you say "on his …
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/17 09:37 PM
2

From what you've said (if you are eating 1800 a day and pumping 800 cal of breast milk, plus exercise), you probably just need to stick with your plan and give it time. You don't want to lose too much weight when breastfeeding, though it will certainly speed things along. At that rate, you should easily losing 1-2 lbs a week. However, that still means it will take about 4-8 months to lose 30 pounds at a healthy rate. Unless you've got your calculations wrong (for example, are you sure your calor…
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/17 07:45 PM
2

Haha yeah, that's of course the struggle. I sometimes skip days, but I've now as one of my goals carved out two specific times in my schedule to use it (esp for weekly/monthly goals and self reflection), so I think that'll help keep me on top of it. I bet it will help a lot that you've chosen a specific time to use it!
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/17 05:50 PM
4

Yes! A fellow bullet-journaler! I am practically a zealot for the things.
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/17 04:51 AM
2

Haha not sarcastic at all! I actually did it last week (sprinted shortly after my small meal) and had an easier time than the other time I sprinted with regular eating. I'll update though!
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/17 04:42 AM
2

Question: how long have these relationships lasted?
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/17 09:30 PM
4

What is happening to this sub?
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/17 07:03 AM
3

I understand your feelings more than you know. My advice: Take one small step every day to improve yourself. I don't care if it's eating one less cookie, flossing, exercising for 15 minutes, talking to a stranger, whatever. It doesn't matter how small. With each little choice you make yourself stronger. Try to think of your past and mistakes as a learning experience. You can either wallow in regret and stay where you are, or you can say "well thank God I know now!" and try to figure out how to d…
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/17 06:56 AM
7

I will transform Wednesdays into a day of physical restraint and spiritual contemplation. This will look like: Fasting (this means 500 calories for the day) Sprinting (starting small with 3 100-meter sprints as fast as I can run) 1-2 hours of self reflection and journaling (listing weekly goals and checking progress on monthly and yearly goals) Post a blog post to my website Some of these I've already begun, some I'm just starting! Looking forward to my progress.
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/17 06:48 AM
3

Female nature is to never be satisfied. It's true. Wish it weren't, but from experience and observation, when left unchecked (especially when it starts as children), the female imperative is to take take take. It makes sense in that we want to provide for ourselves and our children (which in the past we had in high numbers) and have evolved to be selfish. Otherwise we would perish or get taken advantage of. However, it does need to be kept in check.
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/17 03:57 AM
2

That attitude will get them far in life. But yeah, hypergamy wins the day.
/r/RedPillWomen01/10/17 12:36 AM
2

Yeah, I mean honestly, these aren't laws...a clear divide is very important, and if you deviate a little you're not gonna get stopped by the Life Police. I actually like mowing the lawn So there's this yard that needs mowing...maybe it's my yard...
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/17 05:05 AM
2

that our species has been carrying out since it's existence. Right?! Myself included. I know that feel...a very mature thing to realize though.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/17 05:02 AM
4

Haha I wouldn't respond if I didn't want an exchange!
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/17 12:30 AM
2

Well the other part of being truly "red pilled," which I'm sure you know, is realizing that happiness was never the point of marriage. Emotional fulfillment and happiness were side effects. Marriage was a social and economic contract meant to produce children, provide sex for a man, provisions for all, and a stable unit for the family to revolve around. IMO happiness isn't really the point of life, but I'm about to go down a rabbit hole here.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 10:24 PM
3

I'd suggest you divide things in a very specific way. Like I clean bathrooms and take out trash and you clean kitchens and other spaces. You cook Monday-Thursday and I'll do Fri-Sun. Try to base it on what each person is best at.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 09:47 PM
2

That's true that she won't be aiming for he average guy. But it's the same that many RP men won't be aiming for the average girl. It used to be that most people were "red pilled" (Probably like 97% I'd say, basing that on the #s of self-proclaimed LGBT people). What people seem to misunderstand about the past and about TRP is that these have never been 100% true and there have always been more masculine women and more feminine men and people who don't conform. So yeah, you're right that they do …
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 08:31 PM
2

You're right, there's a ton of assuming in gender roles. But that's whole point. It used to be that the assumptions were very clear, so it was an efficient system. Now it's inefficient because we in the Western world have decided gender roles are some mysterious force that someone made up instead of being something pretty clearly delimited across the world and across civilizations for the past 10,000 years. And before 10,000 years ago, there were still clear gender roles, only they were differen…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 08:06 PM
11

Absolutely. That's where the gender roles really come into play. Women care a heck of a lot more about a home being spic and span than men tend to. Not to say a man can't appreciate it, but they just aren't wired to care as much as we do. Which is why it used to always be our job. Because we cared, we'd do a much better job.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 07:59 PM
3

I see your point and those things do come into play, but that's actually classic BP thinking. By all means, gender roles do not solve all problems, but they really do solve most of them. Things like "good communication" and "gratitude" are very gendered (i.e. expressing gratitude to your wife might come in the form of giving her a gift, and her expressing gratitude to her husband might come in the form of being sexually eager). Sometimes it really is the simplist answer, which is what TRP is all…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 07:50 PM
3

Agreed. There was another line in the article about her "assigning tasks" to her husband where I really saw that she just didn't want to be in charge.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 07:42 PM
0

Well-put.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 03:13 AM
3

Amazingly on point. It's critical to RP theory to know the difference between a shit test and a comfort test, and it's something really not discussed on the RPW side of things. In fact, I think you should turn your comment into a post!
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 02:45 AM
2

Seconding everyone saying that this guy is not your boyfriend, and that these are not "relationships" but FWB situations. You should stop putting the cart before the horse and stop having sex with them right away (which I'm betting you're doing). You need to work on your vetting skills and pick a man who is looking for commitment. Around this sub you'll be told to get commitment before having sex. The problem here is that you keep choosing the wrong guys. The only "boyfriend" who wouldn't soothe…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 02:28 AM
2

I am totally on the same page. I'd rather get no gift than a gift I don't like. And I am very particular in my tastes, so you would really have to pay attention to me to give me something I'd like. I mean, I appreciate the thought, but I often end up feeling guilty and have accidentally insulted people before, for example, by saying things like "hmm, I think maybe I did need he bigger size" instead of just saying I loved the piece of clothing. I have taken the route of making gifts and giving ev…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 01:37 AM
1

That's what I do too. I don't like rote gift-giving for myself or for others. My guy has always said I give the best gifts, and all I've ever given him is booze he likes, hunted meat he couldn't have bought anywhere, and a few other things like that haha!
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/17 06:20 PM
2

Oh yes, absolutely!
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/17 05:25 PM
1

Super solid advice.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/17 12:51 AM
3

I see nothing wrong with it. My mom has had a housekeeper come weekly since forever to do stuff like laundry, change sheets, mop, vacuum etc. It's less expensive than you would think. Especially if you work and have kids, it seems crazy not to outsource something. Edit: after reading the comments, I also think it's important for me to mention that as a kid I always had chores, was responsible for cleaning my room, cooking and cleaning for dinner, and various other chores having to do with mainta…
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/17 12:24 AM
1

Sure.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/17 12:14 AM
3

Sure, that makes sense.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/17 10:57 PM
3

Haha, absolute truth! I actually always like your comments.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/17 07:54 PM
6

Harsh truths. Men and women are different. Double-standards exist for a reason. That doesn't make cheating acceptable (remember, TRP is amoral), but it does mean we have to understand why those differences are there.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/17 07:50 PM
4

The men at TRP don't say "well, if she branch swung, you need to up your game and get fit/be a better man." That's because the TRP forum is very anti-relationship. They have different goals, and this is we always say not to go over there, because men are usually in the "bitter, pill-swallowing" phase over there and haven't come around to the point of seeking how to have a good LTR. They don't represent all RP thinking. You do, however, find many posts on that subject (upping your game to keep a …
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/17 05:02 PM
6

When it comes to vetting for a husband: infidelity should always be a deal breaker. When it comes to marriage: forgiving a husband and working to move past the incident with understanding, careful thought, patience, and compassion should always be given every possible effort. This makes so much sense and I have never thought about it this way before. I have always been of the mind that cheating shouldn't always be a deal-breaker (that's way too simplistic), but I didn't know where to draw the li…
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/17 04:51 PM
2

I'm glad you found your way to us. 16 is a great time to start to invest in yourself and create good habits before you encounter the stresses of adult life. If you want to increase your SMV and your RMV (which is important for keeping a relationship), lose weight and cut the degenerate behaviors like smoking weed and shoplifting. Especially the shoplifting. Don't worry so much about the physical structures of your body (forehead size, hip location, etc.) that you cannot change. You are honestly …
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/17 07:02 PM
4

Hi, I'm u/SouthernAthena, and I'm a nerd. Like a real big nerd. I love to read and write and learn about esoteric things, I used to be obsessed with Lord of the Rings, but I don't play video games. Being feminine and nerdy are on two separate spectrums. Keep the nerdiness, just learn how to look hot (here's where you take your cues from the bimbos, just don't go too slutty) and talk to all kinds of people. Work on being friendly and sensitive (though I bet you've got that last one down already).…
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/17 06:39 AM
6

I'll let you in on a secret. I sometimes wear pants. All kidding aside, RPW, according to the sidebar, is "anti-feminist, non-feminist, traditional..." Nonetheless, you are welcome here. If you stick around, you will find many feminists here. RPW (and TRP) are not dogmas. Think of it as a tool kit. We (any RP forum) operate under a set of basic understandings, but how you apply them and where you take them is entirely up to you. Some of the basic truths of RP: -Men and women are different. Gende…
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/17 05:22 AM
2

Heck, why not become obese and get into credit card debt, just to test that they really love you. Haha! That gave me a good chuckle.
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/17 07:12 PM
1

I gotcha. I've never known a stay at home wife couple that divorced.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/17 11:04 PM
2

You are absolutely right that men have been relegated to a companionship role in relationships. This is bad news for everyone, because marriages used to be built on a more solid basis. Men have lost power in relationships because: -they are not the sole breadwinners -no-fault divorce laws -birth control allowing women to control their fertility -custody courts largely favoring women -destruction of traditional gender roles in general (including expectations of a good wife) -introduction of the i…
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/17 09:12 PM
7

I believe a lot of troubles married couples have in the bedroom today are based on the completely skewed balance of power in marriages and the de-masculinization of men. Sex won't be appealing if you don't respect your husband, and I think many women don't due to the fact that masculinity has been quashed in our society and the fact that she knows she can divorce rape him at the slightest discomfort.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/17 04:55 PM
1

I get it, I really do! I still sometimes feel terrible about my slight belly (most people would say I don't have a belly, but I have never had a totally flat stomach, no matter how skinny I am) and big, frizzy, wavy hair, even though I understand I'm just different on a genetic level. But when you grow up and all the pretty girls have stick straight blonde hair and blue eyes, it's easy to feel like a monster, even when you are not!
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/17 04:28 PM
1

Sorry that you feel this way, but I get it! Ethnic girl living among white people will do that to you...I feel the same way about my big hair. Yes, technically Jews and Greeks are "white," but let's be honest, there's a bit of a difference between a Greek gal and a Scandanavian. I'm sure your nose is just fine, honestly. You've just got to look at yourself in context.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/17 04:32 AM
3

Haha okay, cool! I've been puzzling over this trying to figure out whether I messed that up or whether s/he was discouraging people from looking to the movie plotlines as a model for reality.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/17 04:00 PM
6

Yeah, pretty much. "I will reject your reality and substitute my own!!"
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/17 03:53 PM
5

Exactly!
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/17 05:42 AM
9

Also: Sandra Bullock has a bangin' bod. I know right! I wish I could pull off the tube top like her.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/17 04:33 AM
6

Sorry! I wanted to focused less on the totally unrealistic love stories themselves and more the makeovers, but I suppose that didn't come across.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/17 04:29 AM
1

Seems weird to me, but to each their own.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/17 07:03 PM
3

I have noticed this trend as well. I think feminism has bitten more men in the a** , and more brutally, forcing more into the RP light. Many women are either getting everything they want or getting everything they're told they're supposed to want (high-powered jobs, supplicating men) and haven't figured out why they are unhappy. It's a lot more straightforward for men who can't get a date/can't get sex/get their kids taken away by a cheating wife that there is something wrong with the narrative.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/17 07:02 PM
5

Can't go on airplanes without being disassembled?
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/17 06:52 PM
5

Oh yeah, definitely with those subs you are going to have issues. I had a post once "doxxed" (I put that in quotes because they were wrong about who I was) by The Blue Pill, and I was either mocked mercilessly or given pseudo-pity for being a battered woman.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/17 05:44 PM
3

I definitely use a different account for most of my other posting. It's just the way of things.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/17 05:42 PM
2

Looked at their website. Still don't know what it is. Sounds vague and not like anything.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/17 11:28 PM
1

Never heard of it. Will look it up.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/17 11:25 PM
3

There's a difference between being nice and being a total pushover. You have to assert your needs and personal boundaries. Having no boundaries isn't "being nice," it's as another user said, being a doormat. Bring issues to your man as soon as they crop up. Don't sit on them or think "I don't want to be a bother." This should be true outside of romantic relationships too. Eventually having no needs comes across as having no personality, which is what leads people to take advantage of you.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/17 04:07 PM
3

Good for you! Glad you found us.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/17 10:38 PM
2

I often joke with my boyfriend...I'm interesting, but not well-adjusted.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 06:17 AM
2

There are many ways to help out children True! This is a great idea.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 06:15 AM
3

I think as long as I can make a positive contribution to someone other than myself, that's the most important thing I can do. I think you've really nailed it there. I really appreciate your input.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 06:14 AM
2

I am happy in my life (or I feel like I am fulfilling my purpose I should say...my life has been very full of struggles lately, so it seems like "happy" would be an odd way to put it. I know you're using my own words tho). My question is how could you help fill the void that not having children would create?
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 06:12 AM
13

Yeah, I think if it's any truly serious relationship or marriage, you should definitely be each other's closest. Friends, especially other women, should absolutely not come between you. That would be a huge betrayal if there were a female friend who is closer to your SO than you, unless the relationship is quite new, and then she would need to take a step back from his life. And while family members can be expected to be close, you are supposed to share yourself completely with a spouse. At any …
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 05:53 AM
4

True. They do have a good sidebar post about why people are child-free. I was just a little shocked at what I saw there. Goes to show you I've had my head in the RP sand lately.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 12:48 AM
6

Jesus... thought that subreddit would be full of people celebrating life and adventure...turns out it's post after post of hating on parents and children. I think those people may have different motivations than me. Well, you tried, haha.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 12:34 AM
4

I'm not actually basing my decisions on this thread. I wanted to start a RP discussion.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 12:14 AM
2

Hah! Apt.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/17 12:13 AM
2

Ah yes... Good ole humidity. I can relate. Still though, not having to wash it every day is still nice!
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/17 04:33 PM
3

With my hair type I can wash once a week! 0_0
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/17 02:52 AM
5

Apart from meals, I definitely go for the simplist possible approach for all of the above (I love cook, also I don't have a baby). My hair is a wild mane naturally so I just have to embrace it (too much styling looks weird, and my man doesn't like the feel of lots of product), but a comb and a few clips or bobby pins and no more than 5 minutes can produce a cute hairstyle. My makeup tends to only take 5 min too (concealer and a touch of eye makeup). My exercise tends to be brisk walking around t…
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/17 02:51 AM
7

give back once every 2-3 times he gives to you Funny, I've heard RP say the same advice for men and their behavior toward women. I think this is why we talk about trying to not make relationships transactional. Of course, there needs to be balance. Overall good post though. In my experience, men these days do really want a fairly independent woman. Not a "strong independent woman," but a woman who can take care of herself and isn't totally dependent. I'm sure there are exceptions, but, for examp…
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/17 02:17 AM
2

This! Go bars and you'll catch bar flies!
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/17 09:44 PM
2

Good advice... dubious source when they reference her previous marriage in the article haha.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/17 01:07 AM
3

We are mammals at the end of the day, put on Earth for the sole purpose of procreation. No amount of technology or philosophy will change this. Most women these days don't think they want children until suddenly they're 35 and baby crazy, and either they hop to and have a kid, or they adopt a cat or dog and funnel all their motherly desires into their pet. As for women working, it's sad because basically we have simply doubled our labor (men+women) for half the pay. It's inefficient and makes ma…
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/17 07:00 PM
3

Even women I know who aren't super feminist always have the lap dog boyfriends but act like men are gross Yup. As TRP tells us, women are disgusted by weak men whether we realize it or not. And yes, this woman has a lot of problems.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/17 06:57 PM
1

Women have always worked outside the home, but it was much less common for middle class families and almost unheard of for wealthy families. Even many working class families got by pretty well with just one breadwinner. Since the push for equality in the workplace, the value of labor has been diminished to the point where a 90s couple--both working--make the equivalent income of one man in 1910. I understand this is for a variety of economic reasons outside of feminism, but the point is that, id…
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/17 04:02 PM
2

I do feel for you. I am flabbergasted by the situation in Germany and so do not envy it. I am sure it is incredibly stressful. There is a huge cultural shift going on that is basically breaking down all of your systems.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/17 03:43 PM
1

Wow. Germany really is a different place.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/17 03:41 PM
1

What is Kindergeld? I understand it literally means child's gold or something like that...do all parents get a stipend for their children or is this some sort of low-income thing?
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/17 05:16 AM
1

u/waldorfmutti, see what I mean with the difference between the US and Germany? Being a teacher may be similar in both places, but most corporate jobs are much higher pressure with longer hours.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/17 05:15 AM
5

Yeah, it's rough to watch the people you love make choices that destroy their happiness. I have some dear friends who are the same way. (One is so obsessed with the idea of a science career that she can't see the good life she already has that's right in front of her, and the other basically works and smokes weed and up until recently insisted on polyamoury.) All I can do is give advice gently and when solicited and let them do their thing. Of course, the polyamoury girl is convinced that my boy…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 11:00 PM
6

Heavy drinking is a blue pill hobby. Tell me about it! Most of my friends are BP (that's just how most people my age seem to be), and this is one of my biggest problems with them. I did drink too much in college, but I realized it was a mask for social anxiety. When I confronted that, I no longer wanted to drink excessively. 5 years after my revelation, I feel like some of my friends still haven't caught on, and it's frustrating.
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 05:45 PM
1

Great reply.
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 05:42 PM
9

I touched on this in another post reply earlier actually. Some people are just going to be miserable no matter what. No system works for everyone, but IMO traditional gender roles with an emphasis on family is fulfilling for most people. However, I think there's a whole trove of reasons why people in the West are miserable... breakdown of extended families, removal of The Church as a center of life, consumerism to fill any void, overconsumption of entertainment instead of fulfilling hobbies, dec…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 05:41 PM
6

I understand. We don't have 3/4 jobs in the US. Our shorthand for a normal job is "the 9-5" (9am-5pm). Teachers here spend 7hrs a day in school (including lunch and their lesson planning periods where ideally they don't have students). I'm not sure how much time they spend outside of school grading papers, but it's probably 1-2 hrs a day. So not too different. Teaching here is both considered low stress and high stress depending on who you talk to...low stress because of summers off and good ben…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 05:36 PM
2

It sounds like you've been reading TRP's (the forum's) take on things, which is really not a very good view of how to find a meaningful relationship as most men over there aren't looking for that. The Red Pill isn't a single-minded dogma. You can take what you want and leave the rest. The wall: women do stop looking super young around 25, but most people would agree that, if you stay in shape, a woman can stay very attractive and young into her 30s and even 40s and is still definitely viable for…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 05:13 PM
5

I have a higher n-count than I would like. I have been in a committed relationship for almost 5 years, and my boyfriend knows everything (probably too much). My number is still lower than his. He doesn't hold it against me but originally was upset at my some of my actions because I wasn't acting like I respected myself (which, at the time, I didn't.) However he also knows that I regret my hook-ups and that they came from former low self-esteem and being lied to constantly about how a woman shoul…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 09:27 AM
6

I have a higher n-count than I would like. I have been in a committed relationship for almost 5 years, and my boyfriend knows everything (probably too much). My number is still lower than his. He doesn't hold it against me but originally was upset at my some of my actions because I wasn't acting like I respected myself (which, at the time, I didn't.) However he also knows that I regret my hook-ups and that they came from former low self-esteem and being lied to constantly about how a woman shoul…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 09:27 AM
3

Do you live in Germany? Also, what is a 3/4 job? I'm not implying that you can't work at all, but there are still trade-offs we make that you have to be aware of. I'm mostly warning against competitive corporate jobs and placing the focus on career and forgetting about family entirely. Also I think things are a bit different in the US in terms of working hours, stress level, vacation/maternity time, etc.
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/17 08:58 AM
1

Good luck! It'll take some adjustment, but you will both like the change!
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/17 07:41 PM
2

This can be fixed. Don't give up. It's much better to fix the good thing you have now than to toss it out and repeat the same mistakes with someone else. You do not need to be married for the advice to apply. The books seem to help women learn to let their man step up and take the lead when they are used to holding the reins. It sounds like you may be having some issues related to a balance of power. You feel the lack of spark because he is not taking control and leading in the relationship. He …
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/17 06:18 PM
6

At RPW we advise that a mix of Alpha and Beta qualities is best for relationships for this exact reason. Anyone telling you to chase an Alpha needs to read the sidebar.
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/17 04:11 AM
6

It is possible that he forgot how delicate you are and how strong he is, but that should be something he should be aware of and adjust for, especially if it's happened in the past. He is an adult who can be mindful of his behavior. He would remember to be gentle with a child or a puppy (presumably), so why can't he remember with you?
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/17 04:09 AM
4

This has been said many times, but it bears repeating: this is extremely controlling behavior that could easily lead to abuse. I do not say that lightly. For context, I'm the kind of person who thinks it's inappropriate to have close 1 on 1 relationships with members of the opposite sex and would find it totally within reason for my SO to ask me not to hang out with men alone, go to bars by myself, go to clubs without him etc. However, you were doing completely wholesome activities that good men…
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/17 04:06 AM
5

Many people around here recommend The Surrendered Wife by Laura Doyle or Fascinating Womanhood. I haven't read either so I can't personally endorse them, but they may be of use to you and are very popular around here. A few questions before I can advise: How's the sex? How is his leadership? How are decisions made in the relationship? (Mostly his lead, mostly your lead, through fighting, etc.) What does your time together look like? What do you do and how are your moods around each other? What i…
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/17 11:20 PM
3

If he cheated at the first sign of trouble that would be one thing, but he sat with these problems trying to communicate in a gentle (albeit ineffective) way for more than a decade. I don't think anyone here thinks cheating is good, but it should be considered that he suffered in order to stay with you for so long.
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/17 10:17 PM
9

I think in this situation it could be worth working/fighting for each other. You have a long history together, and both seem to still care about each other. From my POV, your SO cheated after years of you telling/showing him his needs didn't matter (you say you've been together 12 years and have been overweight at all but the beginning...so let's call it 11 year of telling him his needs don't matter). He was supremely patient and gave you the benefit of the doubt that you would change, but you n…
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/17 10:09 PM
1

The information that describes the community, basic info on rules for posting, basic reading materials, and basic ideas that we operate on. Also known as "community info." People will tell you to read the sidebar if you seem to be missing the basic info. This is true for any subreddit.
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/17 10:03 PM
1

To clarify, I don't think the experience was a waste, but I do think my degree is a waste.
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/17 08:13 PM
1

Take a breath! You don't have to figure everything out right now. In fact, you can't anyway. College is a great place to meet people, both friends and quality relationship material. Continue to improve yourself and your social skills. In fact, what they don't tell you in the brochures is that college is really way more about the connections than it is about the education. I know it's cliché, but take it from someone who wasted her college years. Join clubs that interest you, make friendships and…
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/17 08:08 PM
1

I'm going to refer you to the sidebar now.
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/17 07:57 PM
1

Find a woman whose life you admire, and take note of what she's doing. Clearly this isn't going to be your mother. Maybe a friend, aunt, grandmother, etc. If you have none of these, try expanding your social circle to include some women you aspire to be like. This could mean going to church or yoga class or volunteering. Try to befriend her. Take note of how she speaks, her body language, her habits, and the major decisions she makes. Stuff like makeup and how to dress you can get a good start w…
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/17 10:48 PM
2

I was wondering where she'd gotten off to! Too bad. Probably very busy with a new baby.
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/17 10:30 PM
3

Tim Hunt. "Let me tell you about my trouble with girls … three things happen when they are in the lab … You fall in love with them, they fall in love with you and when you criticise them, they cry.”
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/17 10:10 PM
2

Welcome to the fold. Feminism and grievance culture don't give you any tools to improve your life or recover from trauma. It storms into your life, throws you a pity party, then dumps you off by the side of the road with all your baggage. It's actually pretty inspiring to realize that most people aren't out to get you (and that honestly most don't even think about you unless you give them a reason to) and that you can change your circumstances if you desire. Yes, sh** happens, and tragedy and ha…
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/17 09:34 PM
3

Actually I just remembered that he compared me to a cat the other day...
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/17 05:38 PM
1

Cat analogy is a great way of putting it! And most people need some space, not matter how much they like you. I always need some quiet time when I first wake up or after a day of work. It doesn't really matter who it is. I just need to unplug, and I am not unique in that. This doesn't meant I don't want conversation and closeness and cuddling, but there is a time I'm not ready for it. It's better to allow your man some space and have your own stuff going on so that he sees you as a delight rathe…
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/17 05:38 PM
15

To me it seems like they are trying to make peace with it, though the ride may have been easier had they accepted aging before it hit them.
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/17 03:58 AM
1

I think some of it is less purely aesthetic and more about the expectations it puts on a man/situation and the approachability factor. My SO once explained that yeah, men might like women with perfect bodies and flat stomachs, but it puts pressure on him to keep up and have rock hard abs etc. Not really something that's part of RP thinking, but it certainly made me understand more why men are often drawn to the girl in jeans and a t-shirt.
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/17 10:41 PM
1

Lol! It's flammable, it probably ain't classy!
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/17 10:32 PM
1

You are right. It's so easy to dress to impress these days.
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/17 10:31 PM
2

Well, church goers like marriage, so...the point is apt.
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/17 10:30 PM
5

I actually read a study once that many men are attracted to bleached blonde hair when they are looking for hook-ups and brunettes when seeking relationships. Their theory was that bleached blonde hair was attention seeking more than it was inherently more attractive. Red lipstick is certainly flashy and makes people pay attention to you. Now whether that's positive... Of course, just because it's in a study doesn't mean it's a fact, but I thought their explanation was interesting.
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/17 05:11 AM
2

"It's the color of power!" Nevermind that red looks terrible on me.
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/17 05:07 AM
2

Haha so true! Now that I think of it, all the lipstick-wearing women I know are single. Too boot, I always have my little appearance crises (too fat/hair too frizzy/too whatever) when listening to ads/magazines/tv instead of what my man actually likes!
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/17 05:06 AM
3

Agreed. It's a message we send to everyone. However something like contouring is still going to signal higher maintenance than no makeup to a guy, whether or not he finds it attractive. Nothing wrong with that of course. I've heard a guy say he hates makeup, but loves red lipstick (doesn't really hate makeup, I know). But how would a girl know that before meeting him? I'm sure there are plenty of women he's dated who have never worn red lipstick. So yeah, I don't think it's necessarily a deal-br…
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/17 10:44 PM
7

Because it's bouncy and different? Haha. My dad loves bouncing and playing with my mom's curls.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/17 04:03 AM
1

Haha exactly!
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/17 11:25 PM
2

I agree that this doesn't seem like healthy behavior. Him having time to unwind in a way he enjoys is important, but he is neglecting your relationship for it. You shouldn't have to beg for attention. It's possible he doesn't know he's doing it (if he gets so sucked into the game that he doesn't even really notice what you're doing or that he's a human with a physical body), so you should bring it to his attention that you want to spend more time with him and give him another chance to act diffe…
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/17 04:55 AM
7

Okay, so yeah, your husband does sound like an a-hole. Or rather, he sounds like a sexually frustrated young man who doesn't know how to constructively communicate his needs (the comment about 16 year olds knowing how to do it and how you'll never get better are particularly unfounded). However this is your husband. There are things you can do to improve, but he needs to be willing to be patient and give you time to learn. Sexual ability has nothing to do with age and everything to do with exper…
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/17 02:22 AM
2

Tons of white women who disagree with us. I almost never voice my true opinions in public. Only with very close friends.
/r/RedPillWomen07/08/17 12:20 AM
1

You make a good point, but I think you mistake confidence with aloofness or arrogance. You can be vulnerable AND confident. Vulnerability is about emotional openness and honesty, not weakness. It sounds like your friend needs to work on being approachable. If you seem too perfect, people will think you're untouchable. And perfection isn't real or honest, so there's some part of her she's not revealing to most people (i.e. the fact that she really does want a man). If she's willing to take those …
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/17 07:23 PM
1

I'm glad you got to experience the wonderful and motivating effects of an honest man! My man is very honest (to the point he pisses people off sometimes), but it's so valuable because you know hey are going to give you honest feedback, and compliments mean so much more. I always wanted to be an author, and a couple of years ago, he just said, "why don't you write a book?" And we talked about it, and me made me believe that I had it in me to write one. Now I have written that book and I'm very pr…
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/17 06:24 PM
1

I'm glad you got to experience the wonderful and motivating effects of an honest man! My man is very honest (to the point he pisses people off sometimes), but it's so valuable because you know hey are going to give you honest feedback, and compliments mean so much more. I always wanted to be an author, and a couple of years ago, he just said, "why don't you write a book?" And we talked about it, and me made me believe that I had it in me to write one. Now I have written that book and I'm very pr…
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/17 06:24 PM
2

IMO yes, but I doubt that it's a requirement for commitment. I think having a good relationship is a great way of avoiding the midlife crisis. I will say I think it helps though, from experience. My first serious boyfriend, who I dated starting in high school and at the beginning of college, and I were together about a year and a half when he suddenly broke up with me. He'd come very close to cheating (was caught by a mutual friend right before) and expressed to him that he just "wanted to exper…
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/17 03:33 PM
3

That's definitely a healthy approach. If you are a wreck if you're single, you definitely need to evaluate yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/17 10:41 PM
2

Ooh, that sounds nice! Our decision was pretty much made for us when I was working and my boyfriend was in grad school. We are both night owls, but I had to get up at 7:00 and he didn't...and he likes to watch horror movies while he works/sleeps. I can't fall asleep to blood-curdling screams, and I dislike light when I'm trying to sleep, so separate beds it was.
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/17 05:14 AM
1

Boy do I know what you're going through! My man and I have done LD twice in our relationship (and have been for a year this most recent stint, ending in a few weeks), and I actually lived with his family with him for a year before that. Don't hold back on the affection! This is important in any relationship, but is crucial in the limited time you'll be seeing each other. Make it environment appropriate of course. Don't be afraid to hug, put your arm around him, or hold hands in front of his fami…
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/17 05:08 AM
1

Good, succinct summary that works like a charm! The thing I need to work on is the cleanliness... I'm a chronic clutterer. Also I second the two beds thing. I very begrudgingly accept this, but my SO has been sleeping in a separate bed for, well, nearly 2 years (plus one of long distance, so they were really separate) and I hate to admit it, but I always sleep better. I just miss the closeness. But he's made it clear he's willing to bring the cuddles when I need.
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/17 01:29 AM
2

That being said, if they are not even a little open minded, it could be good to simply avoid the topic like other users have said.
/r/RedPillWomen17/07/17 11:11 PM
7

Eh, I do actually believe a woman needs a man (and a man needs a woman) to be happy. And I used to pull punches when talking about this, but now I just come out and call B.S. when people say that you should never base your decisions on someone else or say you should be completely happy single. I hated being single (well, hated is a little strong...being single is important sometimes, especially when getting out of a relationship) and I feel most complete--and more independent honestly--with my S…
/r/RedPillWomen17/07/17 11:10 PM
3

Great point that needs to be emphasized. My n-count is higher than I'd like but not as high as many, and I will say that none of my hookups did anything positive for me except possibly temporary ego validation (often followed by that ego being crushed). They were not sexually satisfying and certainly didn't get me any closer to "the one." I'm grateful that I am able to connect so well with my partner, but I would probably skip a few of my trysts if I could do it over. It especially hurts when af…
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/17 11:58 PM
1

Good idea!
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 07:49 PM
2

It sounds like the people you are describing (which is, admittedly, most people) are afflicted with the disease of consumerism and easy-out divorce. I think it's less of a biological imperative (not that this is irrelevant) and more the fact that we no longer equip young people with the tools to be a good spouse (or even a good person) that dooms marriages. If you expect a fantasy without having to lift a finger in return, life will have some nasty surprises for you. Monogamy worked for thousand…
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 07:47 PM
13

Welcome to the fold! Glad to have you here. My man found me in a tree when I had dyed turquoise hair. He said that when he talked to me I seemed sweet and normal. The right guys luckily are able to cut through the crap and see the potential in certain women. Believe me, I was a diamond in the rough five years ago! Emphasis on rough. Cursed like a sailor, bawdy jokes, played an aggressive sport full of women who were terrible influences, rainbow damaged hair, ill-fitting clothes, tried to act alo…
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 05:32 AM
3

You just need practice, but also you do still need your space. I am a naturally introverted and socially awkward person, and I used to (and still do) sometimes have trouble knowing how to act in certain social situations, so I would just act like everyone else around me to blend in. For me this came from a mixture of lack of confidence, social awkwardness, and extreme conflict avoidance and need for everyone to like me. This mostly worked, but it also led to me regretting how I acted in some sit…
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 01:13 AM
5

It's good to have a male perspective! Y'all are half of the equation after all. It's a good thought to try to keep in mind what you'd want your child to see in your relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 04:06 AM
1

Likewise!
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 03:55 AM
2

That seems very reasonable. I love the potential of built in babysitter relatives!
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 03:55 AM
2

That makes sense that it's about inertia. I expect things to go out the window for a few weeks or months of settling in, but I'd like to get back to a decent relationship once the dust settles a little. I suppose it's about making concessions when necessary, but not excusing your whole relationship away.
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 03:53 AM
2

Yes, I definitely do. Parents these days are expected to live for their children instead of living for themselves and fostering independent, respectful kids. As a kid I was often tossed (metaphorically) outside to play for hours without supervision when I was at least as young as 6, if not a little younger. I do worry about the demands of being a working mom. That will probably be my reality for a while, and I'm trying to reconcile that. I'm hoping I will be able to work part time or not at all …
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 03:51 AM
1

Thanks! Setting reminders sounds like such a thing I would do. Just as long as my man doesn't see them haha! He wouldn't be flattered. But still, I think it's important to remember that there's still an adult person who needs you as much as the baby does (just not in the same way). Thank you for the tips!
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 03:48 AM
2

Thank you! That means so much to me! And you're right--I think we all have it in us--that's why I'm asking for advice here! And I think that's a helpful way of looking at it. Spouse is #1. That almost sounds like it would be treated as child abuse these days, but it seems like a healthy way to be a role model and teach your kids boundaries. Children notice and mimic how adults treat one another, and if I respect and love their father, they will too. I will keep that approach in mind and pray on …
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/17 03:45 AM
3

Don't put so much pressure on finding a relationship right now. I was hospitalized for psychosis about a year ago and have had to spend a year living with my parents recovering and learning to take care of myself. My situation is a bit different in that I had already been in a committed relationship for four years at the time of the event and had long proven my worth to my boyfriend, so when this occurred he was primarily concerned about my well-being. Don't think about dating until you are stab…
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/17 04:42 AM
3

I had very high hopes for the article but found the post to be vague and full of non sequiturs. Maybe you could share what you gleaned from it?
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/17 04:14 AM
1

I do in fact know what the word means, but I was under the impression Hashimoto's was very rare. Evidently it is not.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/17 11:46 PM
1

Not sure how this is relevant to the post? But yes, you are supposed to go every year.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/17 11:45 PM
1

Yes. Of course it would be hard for her to understand your feelings towards him, because I'm sure it probably works differently for a mother and her children. I'm sure she feels a very powerful love for him. But with siblings it works differently. You bond over shared experiences more than blood.
/r/RedPillWomen24/06/17 06:19 PM
3

Not sure this is a RPW topic exactly, but I'll jump. Your emotions are normal. Your behavior is selfish. You probably were never very close to your brother with such a huge age gap, and you've been separated by time and distance for a long time. It is totally natural to grow apart. It's a little strange to me for you to say you don't love him anymore at all, because to me it seem like there should be at least some fond flickers. I have cousins I've met once or twice who I might not love love, bu…
/r/RedPillWomen23/06/17 07:27 PM
1

Sounds very intriguing! I will definitely take a look. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/17 11:51 PM
1

Yes, he is RP aware. We were both red pilled by life around the same time, and then he found the actual literature and introduced me to it. And I've sort of stopped trying to analyze too much why I'm staying, ya know? At the end of the day I want to stay, so whether this is pro RP or anti RP or makes me naive and stupid or makes me a saint, I don't really care.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/17 11:50 PM
1

Wow, Hashimoto's is an esoteric one! Did Crowdmed even get within the realm of the actual diagnosis?
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/17 07:15 PM
1

Haha no, I can understand your question. Yes, I am attractive (7.5 according to Hot or not if that means anything), I'm personable, I cook, I clean, I play the cello, I have an IQ well above average, and I've been told I'm funny (and by people who are definitely not trying to sleep with me). Not saying I'm perfect, but I could easily go out and find someone else without trouble. The thing is, it wouldn't be him, so I doubt I'd be satisfied. That has been a challenge of this situation though, bec…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/17 06:30 PM
2

Wow! That is amazing. I'm so happy for you and your son. I will definitely look into that. Did you use crowdmed, and if so, did it help? We're still working on the doctor who will listen part, but his mom and he have been doing countless hours of research. That's the one department I haven't been much help in, but neither of them are working, so they had much more time to do so.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/17 02:40 PM
1

Yeah, it probably is.
/r/askTRP21/06/17 11:50 PM
13

This. I couldn't agree more. Failure is temporary, but character is forever.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 11:42 PM
5

Wow, what a situation! And I can definitely attest to the fact that my bf doing everything he can to be well has been a huge factor. If he could have avoided his problems with a simple behavioral change and didn't, I don't think I could respect him like I do.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 11:38 PM
2

For the right person, I'm sure you would be.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 06:31 PM
1

Yes, I've definitely considered this before! I will certainly not rule it out. You're right though. I've always been hesitant to go into business on my own, but I may be able to make it work.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 05:28 PM
2

You're more than welcome! And yes, losing a job takes a similar toll on a relationship and on a man's sense of his worth and masculinity. He will truly appreciate your commitment, and it will strengthen your relationship! Knowing that you can both cope and still support each other is huge.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 05:24 PM
3

Wow! Thank you so much!
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 05:22 PM
2

We still don't know what's wrong with him. We have our theories, but that's about it.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 05:20 PM
1

Thank you! He is an amazing stoic, yet still manages to be sweet and empathetic. I feel very lucky to have him.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 05:19 PM
3

Yeah, I guess when I say "resolved" I meant "addressed and vastly improved." And this past year has been a serious wake-up call in terms of needing to care for myself! I ended up moving home for awhile myself to address this.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 03:12 AM
1

Thanks so much!
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 03:10 AM
2

Oh my gosh, thank you! It is such an overwhelming relief how much better he's been getting.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 03:08 AM
6

Oh wow, thank you so much! As corny as it sounds, I was just following my heart. It hasn't been easy, but it has been worth it.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 03:07 AM
7

hypoagency, lack of situational awareness, and a proud sort of insistent cluelessness where it concerns day to day functioning Those are the types of women who originally drove me to believe feminism was a good idea. Eventually I learned that it's not feminism that saves women from this, but responsibility and accountability.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 02:57 AM
11

I was just thinking about this sort of thing earlier today! Particularly how women in the past experienced the death of their children on a regular basis, yet didn't crumple and quit living. They had to keep going for their husbands and their other children. I'm sure this deeply affected their character. I also feel like I have only recently developed any gravitas. Because of my recent experience, I have had to learn to be emotionally steady, strong, loyal, and resourceful. I feel very different…
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 02:15 AM
2

Yeah, agreed. That's how it works with my boyfriend and I.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/17 06:09 PM
1

Also, when you do feel an emotion, fight the impulse to hide it, no matter how ridiculous you feel. Don't hide the smile, don't shove back the pang of jealousy. Snap at people, giggle in awkward situations, whatever it takes to get used to letting it out there. I am a recovered emotions-suppressor (I elaborated a bit in a comment reply above) and know how hard​ it can be to let yourself be vulnerable. Just remember that vulnerability is very attractive in a woman.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/17 01:09 AM
2

I have a similar experience, and honestly just my boyfriend saying "do you think you're depressed because of what happened with your mom?" helped me in a huge way. I had literally never considered it before, and it shed a lot of light on my struggles. Now, I have been to therapy a few times (and believe it can help people work things out), but honestly what really helped me was working on myself. Having a boyfriend who was willing to stick around and say things like "you can just be happy/mad/sa…
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/17 01:05 AM
1

I definitely had some trauma when I was really little where my mom tried to commit suicide and was comatose for a month. After that my dad (very stoic) was the driving force behind our family for a long time, so I learned to hide my emotions and push them down. For years I've been working on unpacking that and just allowing myself to feel. I've made huge strides and now feel much more in touch with myself and much more balanced. It has also helped my relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/17 01:00 AM
1

I definitely had this problem in the past. You're not crazy, just out of touch with yourself. I'd definitely tell him "I don't know" instead of "nothing." Also I'd suggest taking stock of how you feel maybe 3x a day, without the pressure of having to tell him. Just take note of anything and reflect on what has happened during the day. "I'm annoyed that my coworker didn't do the work she said she would." "I'm tired." "I'm excited to go on vacation!" "I am really really hungry." Pay attention to w…
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 11:32 PM
2

I don't think you're giving up too much to be with him. It sounds like you are still retaining your values and your ability to support yourself if things go wrong. Just be aware that things will be hard when he is in med school. I think that if you both make each other a priority, you can make it. But he has to be willing​ to find time for you and you have to be willing to endure less attention from him.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 11:13 PM
2

I think it really depends on the situation. Sometimes bringing a solution is undermining his leadership, and sometimes it is saving him a headache. If it's an area of the household you usually manage, bring him a solution if you can. E.G. "The kids need to go directly to soccer practice after school, so I'm going to make sure they get a snack beforehand​." If it's a problem that involves the whole household or something in his domain, I'd bring the problem and let him determine a solution that w…
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 09:21 PM
1

Exactly. And that's what I'm trying to figure out. It seems like a lot of people think being a SAHM is the only right way, but I barely knew any of those growing up, so something's got to give. Building a village is a great way of putting it.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 03:35 AM
1

Great posts! I think I take the opposite approach on commitment though. I think a woman should pursue commitment in the same way a man pursues sex. It is his option to grant whatever he feels as appropriate, and her job to ask for what she wants. Of course, this doesn't mean dogging him and pressuring him, but saying things like "I'd like us to be serious and exclusive" and then letting him decide. If that's not what he wants, then you leave. Marriage can be even more delicate, but not so delica…
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/17 08:14 PM
2

Thanks so much! I just want the best for my (as of yet unborn) kiddies.
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/17 04:24 AM
1

Haha I'm realizing that now...silly me, sarcasm doesn't translate online.
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/17 04:23 AM
3

Your life is actually very encouraging to me.
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/17 03:36 AM
1

Yeah, I was being semi facetious when I said "have it all," but it's clear that isn't coming across. You answer my question though--do I have give up motherhood just because I will work? You situation sounds similar to mine.
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/17 03:32 AM
3

I don't get it...I must have really thrown people off with the tongue-in-cheek phrase "have it all." Because what you described having is exactly what I mean by "having it all." I just mean is it possible to be a good wife and mother while working full time.
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/17 03:27 AM
1

I am very nerdy (don't want to be a doctor though). My mom is a physical therapist and has worked most of my life, but I was talking to her about it, and she worked part time when I was really little and then full time I believe when I was in middle and high school. We did have a nanny for a while when we were too young to be on our own (we were left alone when I was 11 and my sister 14. We also cooked the dinners every night from that age). I suppose she could have been there those times instea…
/r/RedPillWomen10/06/17 02:49 AM
1

Okay, so you have truly been a SAHM, no ands, ifs, or buts.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/17 06:07 PM
3

That makes sense. I guess​ it's when you get so caught up with keeping up with the Joneses that you forget to make a meaningful life for yourself. My boyfriend and I often talk about life goals and legacy, and we are very clear about what we want and how we plan to get there. (I know this isn't a discussion about my personal relationships! I'm just using it as a frame of reference so I can wrap my head around everything.) My guess is that people who have midlife crises didn't take much time to s…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/17 05:54 PM
2

Midlife crisis always seems to freak me out the most because in my mind it seems so random. Well, random is probably the wrong word, because in reality it's entirely predictable. Unavoidable I think is what I'm looking for. But I feel pretty confident in that my boyfriend feels far from trapped, and that we will know how to maintain our relationship when we do get married. So I suppose I can only do what I can do.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 10:29 PM
2

Honestly, learning things like this as I got older made me feel a lot more secure. Knowing that cheating is much more complicated than the "I want to have sex with other people, no one person can ever satisfy me, and I am an uncontrollable lecher' explanation given by the mainstream. It makes me feel that my efforts to make my relationship good will actually be rewarded by fidelity (in all likelihood). It would feel very powerless thinking you're not attractive enough or you simply aren't enough…
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 03:53 PM
2

Especially given the fact that women who work in the home have it much easier than in the past (washing machines, electric stoves and ovens, vacuum cleaners, crock pots, etc.), it seems like there should be some wiggle room.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 03:43 PM
1

I am willing to make sacrifices. I'm just not sure how a balance can be struck. I know tons of female teachers who seem to easily strike a balance with their husbands working, but while they have summers off, they still do a 35 hr work week (not including after hours work) during the year. A lot of users here seem to find ways to work just a few days a week, either through long shifts or by working fewer hours. If I were only working part time, I'd be willing to do just about anything, but since…
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 03:41 PM
4

That sounds so wonderful...
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 01:44 AM
1

I love Dave Ramsey! I just took his class a few months ago. Did you work at all when your children were really little? This sounds like a very balanced set up that you have. Something I'd like to achieve.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 01:39 AM
1

That sounds like exactly what I'd want to do! I know my mom worked part time as a physical therapist when I was very young and then full time when I was older. Seems like having some flexibility is key.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 01:35 AM
2

It's less an option I asked for and more of one that was foisted upon me. I didn't ask for a world where most women have to work, but I also don't want to forgo children. Even in poor areas of the world women still have children. Maybe it's just a question of adjusting to a different standard of living. My boyfriend's brother in law supports his family on a $35,000 a year income, although they are on food stamps, scraping by, and get help from their parents. I'd like to avoid being on welfare.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 01:32 AM
2

Definitely the first one. I'm not looking to be CEO or president. I'm working toward being an epidemiologist or something similar in the field of public health. I'd really like to work on nutrition education in schools. If I could, I would be a stay at home mom for sure. But it's never seemed like an option (again, it could be in the future, and if so I don't think I'd have any qualms with giving up a career.), so I've been trying to figure out what I can do with my life short of throwing out th…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/17 05:08 AM
2

Wow, that's some intense slobbishness! I was thinking I'd be reading a story from someone like me (I tend to let clothes and papers pile up), but that was a cut above! Reminds me of some old roommates of mine. Her story is encouraging though. I've been thinking of making a post here asking for advice on how to be organized and neat, because by nature I am messy (though I hate messes).
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/17 04:48 AM
1

I've read this before, and for the most part agree with the article. As I take it, it's saying 1. Men used to control their violent urges and women would in turn respect them 2. Women now get away with physical and emotional abuse while men can't raise their voices without a domestic violence charge 3. If you hit someone, don't be surprised if they hit you back. Nowhere in there did it say to hit your spouse to solve your problems. The article I read didn't say "if your wife is mouthy, give her …
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/17 06:18 AM
2

Not to be crass, but you can't​ polish a turd.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/17 06:12 AM
9

Honey, RP does not condone abuse... physical or mental, and you're getting both. You were there for him when he needed you most, and how does he repay you? By degrading, insulting, and beating you. He doesn't love you, and he even tells you so. Get a good lawyer who will make sure you get what you deserve from the business, and divorce him. I'm sorry this is the situation you're in, but he seems like a parasite.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/17 01:47 AM
3

It's a hard thing to do because we all want to have that moment where we put the people who hurt us in their place. But life isn't a movie, and very rarely does one zinger truly crush someone and show them the error of their ways. Usually it just starts the argument back up. It doesn't end it. There's certainly a level of closure in getting the last word, but with people who don't deserve your time, it's better to leave it.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 11:23 PM
1

Agreed, it this isn't the place for it.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 10:38 PM
5

I used to fall into this a lot, and while it's amazing to feel so strongly about someone that it's all consuming, it can become a bit smothering, especially when the relationship is not new anymore. And to a degree, doing this means you are always depending on that person to meet all your needs, (emotional, entertainment, personal​ development) which is unfair. So this is what you can do: 1.Hang out with/find friends of your own. Hang out with people who are primarily your friends and with whom …
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 07:25 PM
6

If you act like a doormat, people will wipe their feet on you. So so true.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 06:35 PM
10

Do not respond. I repeat, do not respond. He has treated you like dirt. Do not give him the satisfaction of letting him know he's in your head and still affecting you. Yes, you should have said something to him before you broke up and not let him walk all over you, but that is in the past, and it's time for you to grow and get past this. Take what he said as a reminder of why you need to stand up for yourself and your needs in future relationships. I think it's normal for you to miss him, but I …
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 06:34 PM
4

A common frustration these days. Where are you finding your dates, may I ask? I think starting with the right audience is the first step. If you're​ on Tinder, for example, looking for a housewife, you're probably not going to get what you're looking for.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 06:27 PM
1

Just making a lol
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 02:42 AM
1

You're welcome! And yes, I think that would be good for you.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/17 10:40 PM
3

I totally understand the feeling. I feel that way seeing wedding bands around women's fingers and seeing women carry around cute little babies. It's easy to get impatient when you want something so much. But your time will come.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/17 12:07 AM
7

I'm so sorry for your loss. Try not to get too discouraged! The journey is not over yet. But from what you've said, I don't think you've done anything wrong. From what I understand, 35 is more the age when it's beginning to get a little too late for kids (at least easy, safe pregnancies), but unless you smoke or have an untreated STD, an ectopic pregnancy is not something you could have caused.
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 08:31 PM
3

I just thought the commenter had low self esteem.
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 08:23 PM
4

I mean, 18 year old boys certainly want sex... it's been a minute since I've been 18 (7 yrs), but when. I was 18, they certainly didn't expect it. And even if they do, that doesn't mean they're going to get it. It would be good practice for you establishing and maintaining boundaries. But, it's really your call when or if you date.
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 05:32 PM
8

It seems like a solid plan, although I wouldn't hold too strictly to the "finish school with no relationships" and no prom date rule. I think dating is an important part of learning about yourself and how to vet for a good partner. You don't have to compromise your physical boundaries to do that either. But it's good to know what kind of men are out there so you can spot a good one when he comes along. I also don't know how being a politician and also taking 16 years off will work out. You can't…
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 03:49 AM
4

I asked him to use protection but he said that was hypocrite because when I slept with him, I didn't use one. He said that he would try but only if it doesn't break "the mood". He won't "try." That's a BS excuse. To him, you are just another one of his plates. If he can't even wrap it up to protect you, he doesn't actually care.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 09:59 PM
3

Your first mistake was agreeing to an open relationship. But that decision is already made. Now you have to decide what you want. You love him, but you don't love him sleeping with other girls. Let me break something to you--he's clearly not going to stop, and you're not going to be able to be okay with it. He wants the benefits of both the single life and having a girlfriend, without the downsides of either. If you want advice on dealing with jealousy in an open relationship, RPW isn't the plac…
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 09:52 PM
3

Back when I acted more masculine (cursing, bawdy jokes, acting like one of the guys) I would attract a lot of beta types who were looking for someone else to lead. This never worked out, because I'm really not that masculine on the inside. I'm not sure what I attract now that I've become more feminine, since I've been off the market for so long, but my BF is very masculine.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 03:02 PM
2

Totally agreed! When I was younger, I used to think taste in music and media was one of the most important things that could ever matter in a relationship. My BF and I share maybe two bands we like. There are many more important aspects to relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 10:59 PM
2

-level headed and logical (and able to weather the storms of my emotions) -ambitious (does not have to be money-based) -self sufficient -able to be sweet and comforting sometimes -extrovert or expressive introvert -good relationship with family
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 10:57 PM
1

Agreed. That one seemed like too much.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 01:44 AM
2

I'd think though that with pheromones, you'd be able to tell that a person smells bad to you before you got downstairs though. But I guess that can be ignored if the guy wants it enough, until he gets down to business at least. I just read the words "horrid" and "revolting" think it could be more than just a compatibility issue. You're right that some people smell good to us while others don't. Anyway, this is not even the point of this post haha! I've just read stories like this of "It smelled …
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/17 09:01 PM
8

If all it took was reading a little bit of RP theory to make you fall out of love with her, maybe you weren't so in love to begin with. She sounds okay to me. And while no, she's not a precious snowflake, she might be able to be worked with, esp since you found her young. However, if this is the reaction you're having, there's a good chance monk mode and some personal growth are what you need anyway.
/r/TheRedPill24/05/17 08:51 PM
3

You're right. It's probably only ever taken a few weeks or a month for me to get commitment in my LTRs, and to me that seems like a reasonable time to wait. (I know what it want! :P) I think in the past, courtship and engagements were much shorter affairs (unless of course you're talking about royalty where engagements could be set at age five and not completed for another 10 years, but that's only if you're waiting for sexual maturity...I digress), which meant no one was waiting years to consum…
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/17 08:09 PM
2

Exactly! My guess is these ladies are not.
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/17 08:00 PM
1

I think your aversion to talking on the phone is a generational thing. He's 6 years older, so not truly from a different generation, but to him phone calls are probably a lot more normal​. Also my BF gave me his number when we first met, and I figured it was just to make sure I was actually interested instead of just being nice. We've been together almost 5 years, so take from that what you will. Maybe you could just tell him you're not comfortable talking to him on the phone before you know him…
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/17 05:16 PM
2

Just an FYI on odors...if it's really bad, it's probably unhealthy. Bacterial vaginosis or a yeast infection usually is the cause. So you are right (on an evolutionary level even) to want to stay far away from that. It is possible she doesn't know because you can get used to the way you smell...but it seems like she really should know.
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/17 04:30 PM
3

This is a great way of looking at it. I'm not on the market, but I've often wondered how the waiting for sex concept would work out in our modern day. While waiting for marriage may be the best in an ideal traditional society, that's far from what we live in, and I've often thought that putting that proposal forward could prevent a lot of great relationships from forming. Of course if that is something important to you and something you believe in, that in itself would be a crucial part of the v…
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/17 04:23 PM
1

Yeah, that would be a very bitter pill to swallow. I also think that me and my SO solve our problems in a way that, while sometimes messy, is much less damaging than cheating. We've been through a lot and grown a lot together, so the idea that one of us would feel the need to cheat to get their needs met seems out of character.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 09:21 PM
2

I will say sometimes his desire to debate things wears me out, and sometimes I feel like he considers ideas more than my feelings, but this isn't a very big problem since I also do like to debate and consider challenging points of view.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 09:17 PM
2

Oh cool! And yes, we are highly compatible. He is supposed to be one of the hardest personality types to get along with, and I am one of the easiest :P. So I am one of the few that can deal with him with little problem. I don't mean that at all as an insult. ENTPs just have intense personalities! I also sometimes test as an INTP, if that makes a difference.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 09:11 PM
6

I like the idea of growing stronger after cheating, but I also don't think I could ever forgive that. I think it would be over right then. Maybe, maybe if we were married with kids, I would try, because divorce is terrible for children. Of course, I am thinking from the perspective of being cheated on, not cheating, just because I don't think I would ever cheat.
/r/RedPillWomen20/05/17 12:48 AM
2

That would be fine with me. I don't have any doubts about you being a troll 😊. That does sound more secure than announcing it, for sure.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/17 06:01 PM
3

I'd be in! How would members be invited/vetted if we don't know the RPW usernames? Not that I want to use mine.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 11:00 PM
2

Hahaha yes!
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 10:56 PM
2

Yeah, definitely if it's rambling and hurting you, that's not okay. It sounds like from what you said, he's not over it. When my boyfriend talks about his exes, there's definitely a sense of emotional detachment. Nostalgia sometimes, but definitely not longing. I'd definitely tell him it hurts you and that you can't be there for him in that way. If he really can't get over it...just move on. Sucks, but you don't want to be with someone who's still in love with someone else.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 02:47 AM
1

I'd definitely address this with her. If she gets no other feedback, she'll continue thinking her advice is gold. Tell her if you want advice you'll ask for it, but that you're mostly looking for understanding and an open ear. I always give advice very carefully and sparingly and only in situations that really call for it. Oftentimes people, like you, really don't want to be told how to live their lives. It's much better to mention it and risk hurting her feelings a tiny bit than to ruminate and…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 05:31 PM
3

I agree that often sharing is just trying to give the other person a better understanding of your life and how you've been shaped by experience. Not ever speaking of it in a serious LTR would be like eliminating the effects of your parents' divorce or something equally significant from any conversation. Of course this is a delicate subject to approach with sensitivity, but it seems odd to just pretend it never happened.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 05:26 PM
2

I'd definitely let him know it bothers you, and do it every time he brings her up. Personally I've never had the rule of "never talk a about exes ever" because they are part of your life story and shape who you are today. However, emotional or sexual comments can be very upsetting and I think are both hurtful and TMI. If he continues to disregard your feelings after several times (if he doesn't stop immediately), let him go.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 05:19 PM
3

Awesome! I think it's cool that you're here and gain value from the community. I also like that RPW does not have a cookie-cutter model for life. I do value that it helps us cultivate ways of being happy, fulfilled people and partners.
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 01:22 AM
1

Oh my God it's so true! I am so proud of how brave be has been this whole time.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 12:59 AM
3

As soon as I read "abusive" and "enabler" I immediately disqualified their opinions as valid. I know you want their approval because they're your parents, but they do not want what's best for you. You sadly may have to face a wedding day without them​. Try to focus your energy on the healthy relationships in your life. Perhaps, for your wedding, you could go for an unconventional partner to walk you down the aisle. At my cousin's wedding, my uncle walked his daughter-in-law-to-be down the aisle,…
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 12:54 AM
2

Wow, here I'd built up in my mind that you have a perfect life and husband because of your great posts, new baby, good job, supportive MIL, etc., but this goes to show that it really is work for all of us to live the good life. Kudos to you for not blowing up on him! My way of dealing with anger is usually actually to get sad and say nothing (not practiced, just my personality type), and my SO always says that my method of dealing with his anger when it happens is much more affective then with h…
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/17 10:39 PM
2

Thank you. It's tough, but I've just had a gut feeling that he'll get better. Right now it's looking up, and I'm hoping it continues to do so.
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/17 02:11 AM
1

From what I can tell, it's just a folk saying. The Bible has many phrases along the lines of "Christ is the head of man, man the head of woman, and God the head of Christ."
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/17 06:19 PM
2

You'll have to fill me in on what an "Instagram baddie" is, but my guess is that your style probably isn't the problem. It is possible that this style could make you seem a little too 1. Slutty (skintight dresses, skirts cut up to the crotch, tops cut down below the boobs) or 2. high maintenance (if you're super fashionable in any style, guys may think you're too much upkeep, plus with this style they may associate you with the social-media obsessed). However, most of these styles look cute or c…
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 05:35 AM
1

Or was that a joke I was too dense to get?
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 12:27 AM
1

I didn't actually know there were more lines! That would throw off the whole analogy.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 12:20 AM
1

Haha sounds good. I think children are the most important factor in the ultimate veto power being necessary. As a child of parents where ultimately my dad had the final say, in retrospect I think it was good for my development to have to consistency of parents always being on the same page. Squabbling over whether to paint the walls bone white or peach, or disagreements on whether curfew should extend to 9 or 11 just makes the kid question the authority of both parents. Most of the time the way …
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 12:18 AM
4

Also, do you have kids? Because I think kids are the most important factor for one person to make the final decision.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 01:42 AM
5

Whether or not you agree with this theory, I think calling it authoritarian is a misunderstanding. The captain/first mate dynamic reminds me a lot of our 3 branch government system in the US. The branches balance each other out and cooperate most of the time on decisions, and many decisions are made by one branch without any interference whatsoever from the other branches. However, the president retains veto power, and in rare instances can use executive orders. Now these executive orders should…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 01:28 AM
3

I agree that health may influence things, but it doesn't have to change the dynamic! Someone who reads my posting history may know that my SO has sadly been bed ridden for two years with a mystery illness (he seems to be on the mend, but that is another discussion). Even though he is no longer physically dominant (which he was in spades in the past), he still guides me and is indispensable​ for looking out for my well-being.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 12:27 AM
9

As always, well said! The captain and first mate dynamic is about leadership and harmony. It says nothing about women being simple or incapable. No one thinks the soldier is stupid for following his general, and everyone knows that if two generals are trying to call the shots at the same time, things will go wrong no matter how good the ideas themselves are. As a ridiculous example, garlic hummus and caramel corn are both great snacks, but if you mix them into one bowl, it is a disaster. "Captai…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 12:24 AM
1

Love the pioneer woman!
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/17 04:04 AM
1

My SO loves deer and beef stew, no matter what. It is so simple, but is still his favorite. I don't use a recipe usually, but I do have an amazing recipe for Flemish beef stew that is really easy, hearty, and so delicious and would be happy to send you instructions for how I usually make stew. He also loves roasted chicken (another simple staple), as well as Indian curries. The curries are far more complicated, but they are mostly based in a core group of spices, so don't get overwhelmed by the …
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/17 04:04 AM
7

So true! This only occurred to me recently after reading RP stuff forever, but I have never put it into practice! I never knew how intimidating it was for guys to approach women, and for my whole life I only stole furtive glances and tried to make sure the cute guys didn't see me looking. I tried to play it cool, thinking that would make me attractive. I was also very shy and afraid of making eye contact and smiling at people period. But you need to let the guy know you're interested to ease som…
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/17 03:12 AM
3

Great comments! Active listening is a huge sign of empathy.
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/17 02:07 AM
5

Welcome to the RP world! We're not here to sugar coat, but to help you improve your life. Femininity is not one set thing, but there are a lot of components that can be fairly universal. First off--drop the cursing. It's not particularly attractive when a man or a woman does it. You'll be much more polite and ready for any audience if you quit. Believe me, I used to curse like a sailor, but I mostly did it for comedic effect, and comedy to me was a crutch for social anxiety and low self esteem. …
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/17 02:06 AM
9

My thoughts exactly! I've always found it rather immature when people can't see past political and similar beliefs in friendships. Of course that stuff matters in romantic relationships much more. Unfortunately I don't always get that same level of respect from friends, and as you said, that's how you know that they were never true friends to begin with.
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/17 12:02 AM
2

Sounds like a wonderful relationship goal! Thanks for sharing.
/r/RedPillWomen06/05/17 12:44 AM
1

Talk about relationship goals! Having your own stuff going on is critical to being able to give your SO a healthy amount of space.
/r/RedPillWomen06/05/17 12:44 AM
2

Aw, thank you! I really love the RPW community and hope I did it justice. I, like you, often read TRP for lack of content here, but you really have to not take it personally. And there really are some good posts there sometimes, like ones about meditation etc.
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/17 03:38 AM
5

I definitely agree that women are in fact adults and are accountable for what we do. It's true, we are more emotional, but we don't have to terrorize people with our emotions. I'd I'd say that this sub is the only one that's pro-man and pro-woman. That's what I like about​ it. It acknowledges the differences in the sexes while denigrating neither. I honestly think that's a much healthier and more pro-society way of approaching things. I think if TRP and TwoXChromosomes were left to run things, t…
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/17 12:42 AM
9

Thanks for your post. These are both very different forums, as we all know. I think TRP is geared toward maximizing the male imperative for sex while RPW is geared toward maximizing the female imperative for commitment. If you visit TRP, you will often find men saying "never get married," which you never see on this sub. Both, as you said, revolve around the amoral RP philosophy. From my experience TRP often has an immoral bent and RPW often is very moral. This is not law, as both subs are made …
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/17 11:34 PM
2

I am an INFP dating an ENTP.
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/17 03:05 AM
2

Thank you! And I completely agree. Our personalities seem so fixed to us, but you really can change if you put your mind to it.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/17 09:05 PM
2

I always treat everyone with respect (unless they prove they don't deserve it), and people treat me very well for the most part.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/17 12:45 AM
1

I ❤ the South.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/17 12:42 AM
1

I wouldn't think so. Not if her song lyrics are anything to go by. (Which honestly, they probably aren't). She talks about toturing men for fun and using them, countless flings, and flouting social sanctions. Sure she comes off as demure in public, but who knows. Her lyrics sure have evolved as shes grown up. She strikes me as someone who grew from an awkward girl into a woman who realized the power in her looks, fame, and money and abused it. Maybe less so in real life than in the fantasy of he…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/17 10:13 PM
1

I'd say just don't bother. If they are trying to cut you down, cut them out. If you want you can say that you intended what you said as a compliment and then make a swift exit.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/17 12:35 AM
3

I wouldn't recommend chopping of your breasts or hair or gaining weight to tone down your look. And I don't know that it's your looks causing those friendship problems. I think people are just selfish and dramatic a lot of the time. Granted, if you were ugly they probably wouldn't be trying that stuff. But I've had people use me as a therapist and then drop me when they had vented enough. I've also noticed that in most big groups of women I've been in, they eventually try to pull me into their p…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/17 10:03 PM
1

Unfortunately I don't think there's any full remedy for people like us (nor do I think there should be). I still say things that are meant to be compliments, but when they are unconventional, many people just look at your weird or are offended. I try not to worry about it too much. Especially since what is beautiful changes depending on the era, but people only focus on now. If I'm giving a physical appearance comment, I will often drop in a comment about how historically such and such group val…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/17 09:54 PM
2

I definitely grew up an awkward bookworm who didn't figure out how to be attractive until later. I guess even though I was awkward and unpolished I still got great boyfriends who appreciated my personality as well as my looks. I am definitely still not used to stares and overt sexual attention and still feel the ugly-feeling 16 year old coming out. Maybe you could try toning down your looks a little? I honestly don't know what to tell you since I've been in a relationship since before I realized…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/17 06:21 PM
1

Hey-o. It takes one to know one. Yeah, it's how I usually am too, but it's not how most people are, so many are very off put from time to time. I've made very true comments to friends and boyfriends that weren't meant to be hurtful, because to me it seemed like an obvious truth, and they were pretty hurt. It was particularly bad since I often did it in front of company. The other thing you need to realize is that people aren't always self aware or objective enough to know you're right, so they j…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/17 04:06 AM
2

Do you find yourself thinking that people just don't want to hear the truth? That maybe you're "too honest?" Because sometimes you can read people right but they don't want to hear it. That's when you can hurt people's feelings. I used to have that problem. If you're just wrong about facts, either you're talking about something​ that's personal that they weren't planning on sharing with you and it makes them uncomfortable (e.g. relationship status) or they really just aren't people who are worth…
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 07:16 PM
2

Well most people don't get it right 100% of the time.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 05:40 PM
1

Thanks :)
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 05:32 PM
1

Which are you?
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 03:26 PM
1

I'm an autumn. I as you can see from my post history I have dark blond hair. I also have brown eyes and pretty fair skin.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 03:25 PM
1

Yeah I actually have...I'd just never thought to apply it to lipstick! Haha thanks. Good idea.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 01:20 PM
6

Well these days people demonize traditional femininity and masculinity by making both into straw men, and then they try to redefine both (by using the qualities of the opposite gender, funnily enough), so I'd say it can be pretty confusing. When you're told Kim Kardashian is the only definition of femininity, you start to think femininity is bad. They also act like there are no personality aspects to femininity. It really did take me some learning to realize you can be highly feminine without sp…
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 05:16 AM
2

By clutching the case very tightly! Haha. I was running late.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 03:25 AM
2

Figure it out backwards. Find a situation that you already know the context of and notice how people hold their faces, bodies, and interact with each other. For example, of you know Rob and Janet have crushes on each other but don't want anyone to know, see how they act around each other vs. a married couple you know. Or even notice your own body language when you're in different moods. People are generally very predictable, so if you can read a few, you can read most.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 02:17 AM
2

In fact I ran in some carrying a cello earlier 😅
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 02:07 AM
1

Cute! Wedges are the best.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 02:07 AM
1

You're welcome! My SO who generally hates Italian food loves my Alfredo.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 02:02 AM
1

I want to try the Sephora thing again. Last time I was in there I asked one of the sales reps, a gay guy, for advice on lipstick colors, and he recommended this dusty brown color that I could not get off fast enough. Then when I put on another bright orangey pink that I liked but was very bright, I asked a girl who worked there if it was too much and she just said "it is bright" or something vague like that instead of giving me a real opinion. I'd definitely recommend sitting down for a makeover…
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 02:01 AM
1

Yes! Also I just realized I said "ham and beans is..." To me ham and beans is one thing haha!
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 01:33 AM
2

Still sounds delicious! Basically you sautee minced garlic in butter, add cream, add shredded parmesan and whisk to melt, add salt and pepper, and voila! Here's a link to a good recipe, though I don't always use parsley. It's way easier than it seems, and is so delicious.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/17 01:02 AM
2

Haha yep, definitely! Ham and beans is the best.
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 10:32 PM
2

Yes! You covered most of my favorites. I am particularly in awe of cabbage :P
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 09:33 PM
1

This is a tip, not a recipe, but planning the meals for a week, making a list and sticking to it saves a lot of money. If you have trouble sticking to a list, a lot of grocery chains have Click List options where they shop for you, avoiding last-minute cart add-ons and saving a lot of money. Things like prepared foods, sauces, and meals are often expensive for what they are. You can very easily learn to make hummus and Alfredo sauce from scratch. I'd also recommend building up a solid pantry. If…
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 09:33 PM
3

Yes! I thought those were great words of wisdom. And honestly I thought I was still pretending until he said that.
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 07:12 PM
1

You're welcome :). With a supportive guy like that it should be easier to work on your​ self esteem. It definitely helped me! The more you focus on self improvement (try to work on some non-body things too) and keep track of your progress (maybe with a blog or journal), the better you will feel about yourself. I just posted last night about how I've successfully worked on one of the things that used to make me more self conscious than anything. Just take care to pay attention to the difference b…
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 04:23 PM
1

That's so funny--I've a similar experience with my bf, who prefers big boobs, and I have barely B's (more like As really). But he's said he wouldn't change anything about me, and he did choose me after all. It used to bother me, but he wasn't trying to tell me I had a flaw. We all have our preferences. For instance, my SO knows I have a thing for Eastern European men with a certain look (don't ask me why), and he is nothing of the sort. But, he knows there is nothing wrong with him and that I ch…
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/17 06:22 AM
2

That's fair. It sounds like you carry an immense burden that I can't I can't imagine anyone would I want to take on if they had the option. My situation is very different from yours. My SO is fully aware of my situation, and I'm lucky to be 100% normal with no complications with low dose medication (so.damn.lucky.). I just wanted another perspective on it from someone who subscribed to.at least some RP philosophy. As I mentioned in my last post, he is/has been very physically ill for a long time…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/17 03:56 AM
5

Then you're already good at this or should have no problem learning.
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/17 03:46 AM
2

Wow. That is so hard. Amazing props to to--you've earned your flair! Curious-- what would your opinion be of someone who had a mental illnesses but has been in remission for years? Still a next due to potential complications?
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/17 09:23 PM
1

Not particularly. I'd be more interested in a traditional gender roles site, although you can still accomplish this dynamic on sites like OkCupid. I think the non doxxing aspect of this community is important. Also RP men often want different things than RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/17 09:12 PM
7

They may be obvious, but they aren't easy. You don't really need an obscure list...relationships aren't rocket science, but doing it right goes against the grain for a lot of people and requires practice.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/17 05:51 PM
8

Nope. Practice. Learn to STFU and observe people and how they interact with each other in social situations. Some people are born with this gift, but most learn it as a skill.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/17 05:22 PM
8

Great point. The overly high maintenance girls are what made me look down on femininity for a long time (especially the I-can't-touch-anything fake nails), but with my laziness (do not want to spend 1.5hrs on my hair every morning) and my desire to actually DO things (go on the hike, knead the dough, climb the wall) I came up with my own brand of femininity that is low maintenance but still cute. Only later as I shed some of my prejudice against femininity, I learned that my way is still feminin…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/17 04:51 PM
3

Great post! I really like your example from Pride and Prejudice :). I think you do a good job of outlining the skills women should be taught from a young age and that take years to master, but that are extremely valuable not only to a future husband but in social and work situations too. I know I am still definitely working on the "reading the room" type thing. This area is harder for me as I have developed from a clammed up wall flower to a sociable woman, but I am still not the master of the r…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/17 04:45 PM
1

Almost as a stroke of fate, today leaving work, I happened upon a radio show where the host was interviewing Matt Fradd, author of The Porn Myth. He was talking about the damaging effects of porn and said that even moderate users show MRI scan results of an addict with atrophied frontal lobes. He also is a good friend of the guy who runs r/NoFap. I mentioned in my other comment that you are probably a food addict. You are probably a porn addict too. My biggest take away from the interview, which…
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 08:08 PM
2

Thanks for checking in :)
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 06:52 PM
2

I love the bullet journal!
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 05:06 PM
2

As other users have said, your situation is all too common. If you read a lot of stories on TRP (I'm not necessarily recommending this. I just do), you'll find dozens of stories like yours. What I see in your post is a blank slate. You have the power to change EVERYTHING in your life that you have mentioned for the better. You haven't developed yourself at all, so the only other thing to do is build. People may not want to date you now, but you certainly don't have a lot of the red flags people …
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 05:05 PM
1

Haha my thoughts exactly!
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 04:25 PM
1

Even when I was a feminist, I never took this kind of behavior negatively. Especially in the South, it's very common to be called similar terms of endearment by strangers (particularly men 40+) when you are being helpful. As long as they're not calling me "sugar tits" or something like that, we're good. At the same time though, it's totally normal to have a gut reaction to something like this when we've all been trained so long that this is the behavior of a rapist. I wouldn't worry too much abo…
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 04:24 PM
2

Definitely dump him. If it were one small incident of sexting when you first dated and weren't exclusive and then never again, that would be one thing. But this has become a pattern of behavior for him, and he knows how much he is hurting you. Clearly he either doesn't care enough or can't change this part of him, and you don't deserve that.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 04:11 PM
5

Don't tone it down. It sounds like an attractive quality, just one he is not used to and is disarmed by.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/17 04:06 PM
1

I'm not jealous...I have a boyfriend who I love. It's the fact that trp and most men I've talked to seem staunchly against fat women, but reality doesn't reflect this. When I post questions like this on RPW, askTRP etc., I am trying to understand the world around me. When I'm looking for advice for myself, I just ask outright.
/r/askTRP06/04/17 04:10 PM
1

That makes sense. I don't usually interact with these men so I don't see their behavior, and that would definitely make them less valuable. Frame is honestly more important than looks.
/r/askTRP06/04/17 03:15 AM
1

Yeah, I guess I really can't underestimate the commonness of a guy marrying a hottie who gains a ton of weight and became a she-whale. I'm not quite old enough to have seen this happen with my peers, but my (older) SO has many high school associates to whom this has happened , and it's truly astounding how much people can change and how quickly.
/r/askTRP06/04/17 03:14 AM
1

Yeah I guess I get the fact of hypergamy. It's just that the discrepancy seems so large. Not like a 5 dating a 6, but like a 3 dating a 6.
/r/askTRP06/04/17 03:07 AM
2

Sure, but I mean aside from​ that. Surely fat fetishes aren't this common.
/r/askTRP06/04/17 01:16 AM
2

I'm doing a lot better than I was a few days ago, since I have made a decision I feel good about. Considering all the advice but being true to what I want, I've decided on a bit of a compromise. I'm not going to break up with him right now because I am not emotionally ready to let go, and​ he has shown vast, steady (not fluctuating) signs of physical improvement. However, I know I need to set some limits, so I've decided that if he's not rehabilitating within the year, I'm going to have to leave…
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/17 04:04 PM
1

I thought it was very odd that that user said her boyfriend would have broken up with me if he'd known I wrote this (were he my boyfriend) but then the next post said I should demand an open relationship and that if he doesn't agree he doesn't truly love me. Very contradictory, very anti-RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/17 03:43 PM
0

I think about​ half of those women look better without makeup. Without it though they don't look like porn star and maybe look more​ "cute" than "sexy." The other half though...Good god.
/r/TheRedPill02/04/17 11:48 PM
1

I wish makeup weren't the norm. I wear a very small amount some days because it does make me feel more attractive, but I go an equal number of days without, because I want people to know what my face looks like. Honestly the only reason I do wear it is that other women wear expertly painted faces every day, and I feet like I'm not competing as well as I.could without it. I don't wear much of the stuff, so I don't look that different day to day, but with some women it's a drastic change.
/r/TheRedPill02/04/17 10:13 PM
2

He's not even a bad looking guy. He could do great if he had a spine.
/r/TheRedPill02/04/17 06:14 PM
3

I love Dave Ramsey! I took his class at the end of last year. My parents taught me to budget growing up, be he broke it down in such a great way and helped me look at my priorities differently.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/17 07:55 PM
6

I'd say RP view on drug addiction is, absolutely no. Never. You can't submit to and trust someone who isn't a functional adult. You can't even have a RP relationship when your man is just an aimless, spineless beta, let alone a drug addict. Being beta isn't illegal, fatal, or particularly immoral. Think of how much worse it is to be a drug addict than to be beta. We're the group that would warn you off hopeless mama's boys. What do you think we'll say about an addict? I'm not saying recovery isn…
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/17 04:26 AM
5

That's amazing! ❤
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/17 04:16 AM
1

Yeah I'd never heard of it. Right now he's on 800mg inbuprophen 2x a day and that's it. He's tried enbrel (but it made him way worse and put him in the hospital), hes tried Prednisone (worked like a champ but of course is not a long term treatment). They gave him tramadol at one point but he reacted poorly to it and hated it, and then the gave him Coltricine when they thought he had I think it's called Rheumatic Mediterranean Fever. He was also on tumeric for a time. He said he may be willing to…
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/17 05:14 PM
1

My relationship with his parents is very good. I say his father's reaction to the situation is immature because he has known that he may lose the job for years now and had had ample time to prepare rather than just moping. Also he is immature in how he treats his wife, kids, colleagues, etc., but it doesn't affect our relationship since it's not a very deep one. He likes me a lot. He did not ask me to pay rent (they thought taking care of their son/cooking/cleaning was enough) which is why I thi…
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/17 03:41 AM
1

There is a chance he has reactive arthritis which does go away. That is what is throwing us. It doesn't act like any typical case of arthritis. It does act like reactive arthritis except for the duration. However, there are big holes in all potential diagnoses.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/17 01:04 AM
1

The diagnosis I have is very much genetic, which is what they said. My current doctor said my relationship stress didn't help, but it certainly didn't cause it. Probably it brought it about at that point in my life rather than some other stress down the road. Unfortunately it was probably my fate.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/17 12:57 AM
2

If you want an example, see my latest post. I am struggling greatly with the prospect of leaving a very sick SO (long term illness).
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 11:45 PM
3

That's so exciting! Wish I lived closer to CA. I hope it goes well.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 11:42 PM
1

No, I would only consider kids if he got better. That is a complication though, because he had one year of terrible suffering and then one year of gradually getting better. He does not get a pension and is in the process of applying for disability, so he can't do anything for me financially.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 08:50 PM
1

The hard thing is that staying almost seems selfish if that makes sense. By that I mean it would make me feel horrible to leave, not out of guilt but out of a deep sense of loss and grief. Maybe selfish is the wrong word. But I guess what I need to understand is that the loss is because of the illness, not because of my decision if I do leave. I really don't think he would blame me, and I'm really not staying out of obligation. That's why it's so hard.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 08:49 PM
2

I am with him because I love him and still have hope he'll get better (and without a diagnosis I have no idea whether this hope is irrational, because it may not be). He still makes me laugh, supports me and my goals, gives me comfort. He has handled his illness with incredible bravery and maintains hope and perseveres. We often talk about the worst case scenario. He I think has come to terms with it better than I have. And we don't have a timeline for marriage and kids, no.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 08:42 PM
1

I don't think so, but I believe he's been tested for celiac. He doesn't have any stomach problems so it seems like a food allergy would be unlikely, but I suppose it is possible.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 07:01 PM
1

He has had every​ test under the sun.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 06:58 PM
1

Yeah he has been very thoroughly tested for Lyme and tick borne illnesses.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 06:01 PM
1

Large part genetic, but I'm sure stress played a role.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 05:18 PM
3

I am a RPW because I used to be a brainwashed feminist and let it lead me to make bad decisions that hurt me. Only through having a traditional relationship dynamic with my SO (which he was gracious enough to try despite my tough cookie false bravado and coarse manners) did I realize how satisfying and natural it felt to be feminine rather than trying to get approval and male attention as "one of the guys." I also had a conservative upbringing with parents who are still married. I discovered RPW…
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/17 04:08 AM
2

Lots of good advice here. Posture and grooming are crucial to outward femininity. You don't have to wear dresses or skirts all the time, but strive to never look frumpy. Don't walk around in sweat pants or gym clothes unless you are at the gym, and make sure your clothes fit properly. Wear nice flats or heels. Invest in some nice elegant PJs. Make sure your hair doesn't look unwashed or too unruly (there's a lot of leeway here; my hair is wavy and wild) Behavior contributes to femininity in more…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/17 05:25 AM
1

I love Dave Ramsey! Just took his class recently.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/17 04:35 AM
2

It's sad but true. No one wants to be saved, and when they really want to change they will look for answers. This is true for men as well as women. I know many people, one long standing female friend in particular, whose life problems I could explain in a short paragraph. Of course, changing is much harder, but most people don't want to hear the truth and will only resent you for trying to explain why they are miserable. I feel like I could help so many people with RP knowledge, but most don't w…
/r/TheRedPill27/03/17 03:15 AM
2

Given that a lot of women don't even try to breastfeed, I don't think you're exactly abusing your future child. Yeah, breastfeeding is undoubtedly better, but formula feeding is definitely adequate. Those boobs are weird (almost look dip-dyed), and you say it's been a deal breaker in the past. I know that many​ guys are like this, since my boyfriend (after we'd been going out awhile) told me he would have broken up with me if I had ugly boobs. I have very small boobs and he's used to/prefers lar…
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/17 06:06 PM
8

That's complete garbage. I've come across this sentiment on TRP, and to me it sounds like it's coming from a guy in the bitter phase of awakening. It basically assumes that women are simply evil and 100% irrational and irresponsible (while some are, that is certainly not all women). This would be the same as a RPW saying no man can ever be a true Captain because all men are cheaters at heart and will cheat or pretend not to to get their way. Or no man can be truly RP because men only improve the…
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/17 01:36 AM
2

Do you work/have hobbies/friends/sleep? If so, there should be some time you're not available to him.
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/17 05:32 PM
2

I agree with all other commenters here. If you're available, respond. If you're not, wait. Phone's dead? He'll get his text later. Unless he's an overly needy panicker, he will understand that when you can't respond right away, you have other things going on.
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/17 05:27 PM
2

Sounds like a fun night. Too bad I'm out of town! It'll have to be next week for me.
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/17 05:22 PM
3

I finally made the connection that SJW logic was actually communist logic (I know it's no great secret) and how very dangerous that is when I found out that the left wanted you to more or less disown your parents and your family if they didn't agree with you politically. That's when I truly started to fear (instead of just rejecting) what the left was becoming. Not trying to get to political here, but that is a classic communist tactic, and the more you study communism, the more you realize how …
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/17 05:14 PM
3

I don't disagree with you because I too was pretty liberal (maybe an SJW light) until a couple of years ago. However when my compatriots started acting more insane, my more conservative streak kicked in and I started looking further than the surface level information and pop science I was being told. I was saved by the fact that my family is conservative, and I have a good relationship with my dad, but all of the information I got from the wider world was exactly what you described. Especially t…
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/17 04:51 PM
11

They're also my reactions and I'm a woman, so...but I still think men can have opinions about feminist rhetoric, especially when it's based on false statistics.
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/17 02:26 AM
5

I wouldn't say it's the most important thing. I'm just used to hearing the rest of it but still not quite used to seeing children act like drunken sailors.
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/17 01:56 AM
4

Not mad. Just constantly surprised at how far they'll go (using the little girl).
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/17 01:13 AM
6

My thoughts precisely.
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/17 01:13 AM
8

Fixed. Now if you read it you won't give them clicks.
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/17 11:52 PM
2

I would have posted the gif by itself if I could have.
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/17 11:03 PM
2

That's fine. I mostly wanted people to see the gif which came up in the header.
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/17 11:02 PM
4

This is not exactly RP advice, but maybe try to find a Financial Peace University class in your area. It's a great financial management course (funny, easy to understand) that I recently took. It's Christian based, but I am not Christian and I didn't find it off-putting. Maybe you can talk to your husband about being concerned about your financial future (it affects you too) and suggest taking a class. As for shopping and getting your nails done...suck it up. Get a $2 bottle of polish at the dru…
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/17 01:27 AM
3

Thank you for your kind words! And it is very encouraging to hear that you know schizophrenics with full lives. It seems too like you have a good handle on your anxieties and are very proactive. That makes all the difference. You will know if you need further treatment. I hope that you get past it without needing to get any further help, and there's a good chance you will
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/17 09:16 PM
2

Thanks :). Yep, we've all gotta roll with the punches. And mental illness does run in my family. Not 100% sure about schizophrenia (I have an uncle who we suspect had it before he committed suicide), but my mom and sister have definitely had diagnoses. It was a big lesson in the fact that you have to take care of yourself sometimes to be able to care for others.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/17 04:50 AM
3

I was diagnosed last summer with schizophreniform disorder (short term schizophrenia that has the possibility of turning into full blown schizophrenia). Talk about a bitter pill to swallow. This isn't advice so much as my honest feeling: it's been a struggle to not see myself as damaged goods since my hospitalization. Or maybe I am damaged goods but that I'm still worthwhile. I've been with my SO for more than 4 years and am currently seeing him through a very difficult health situation, so he c…
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/17 12:57 AM
3

I was diagnosed last summer with schizophreniform disorder (short term schizophrenia that has the possibility of turning into full blown schizophrenia). Talk about a bitter pill to swallow. This isn't advice so much as my honest feeling: it's been a struggle to not see myself as damaged goods since my hospitalization. Or maybe I am damaged goods but that I'm still worthwhile. I've been with my SO for more than 4 years and am currently seeing him through a very difficult health situation, so he c…
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/17 12:57 AM
2

I'm not bipolar but I do have a diagnosis of schizophreniform (basically short term schizophrenia). I didn't do anything sexual when I was psychotic, but I did do things I'm ashamed of. I'm working on forgiving myself because it really isn't your fault. Even though a high n-count is not good, be glad you don't have any STDs and didn't come out with anything more serious. Just make sure you are getting treatment and you are honest with future partners. Some people will judge you but not everyone …
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/17 12:34 AM
1

My aunt is about 6' and my uncle is 5'6". That's not exactly advice so much as a success story. She is definitely wide framed as well.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/17 12:16 AM
3

Yeah, doesn't sound like you need to worry about your weight. Some of us just don't have tiny frames (like me.) I would consider myself a medium build, have people throughout my life have mistaken me for being 15lbs lighter than I am because of my musculature. I am 5'7" and have never been below 125 since I hit puberty, and I have never been fat.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/17 12:15 AM
2

I do have a thing for brown hair and eyes, but I wouldn't call that my type, because I don't have much of a physical type. If he's above 5'6" and is strong (doesn't have to be cut) I'm satisfied with him physically (barring any deformities). My SO has taught me exactly what I want in a man, or my "type": -Smart -Motivated -Twisted sense of humor -Conservative Loquacious -Strong (physically and mentally) Hopefully I'll never have to date again, but if I do, I have a pretty clear picture of what I…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/17 01:35 AM
2

:/ I was afraid you'd say that. That's too bad. Just be careful with the vit d, but seems like you're keeping tabs on it.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/17 06:47 PM
1

I have several hobbies now, and even in college I had a couple. They're all things I'm genuinely interested in, and not anything I inherited. But in high school in particular I didn't really, apart from listening to music (if that's considered a hobby) and cooking (also more of a life skill IMO). I guess I equate acting like one of the guys with being a "cool girl," because cool girls try to judge their worth on the same metrics as guys. Maybe there's a difference because the "cool girls" you ta…
/r/TheRedPill27/02/17 06:44 PM
3

As a former "cool girl," I will admit it was all because I thought being one of the guys was the way to get guys to like me. Now that I've realized that's completely backwards, I have no problem admitting I sometimes like cheesy romcoms and I hate action movies. The differences attract us, and you don't have to share everything (especially hobbies) with your SO. Things I used to think were critical to relationships (like music taste or taste in books) really are insignificant. Sure, it's cool to…
/r/TheRedPill27/02/17 01:46 AM
1

10000 IU is a lot to be taking. I took less than this level when I was dangerously low on vitamin D, but only for 8 weeks (50,000 IU/week) to reach maintenance levels, at which point I started taking 1000-2000 IUs a day. You may want to get your levels checked because this does build up in your system and can cause problems. Also, have you been checked for h. pylori? That's the cause of most ulcers and can be cured.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/17 01:35 AM
1

(Please read my other comment too.) "It's not about me but the relationship." B.S. Complete and total B.S. The relationship is you, or at least 50℅ you.
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/17 10:47 PM
2

I think if his go-to solution to every argument is "we should break up," he's not in the position to be in a relationship with you. If he has the issues you say he does (depression etc.) that could be making small trials feel so intense that he thinks it's a sign of the end of the relationship. I would suggest talking to him and telling him he needs to get treatment for his depression because it's interfering with his ability to get along with you and resolve conflict. Also, if he is unreliable,…
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/17 10:44 PM
3

I remember that one!! Like, what the hell?
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/17 10:31 PM
5

I love this! I'm so glad they fell back in love. Sometimes all it takes is focus and a sincere desire to change to get you where you want to be.
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/17 10:27 PM
2

Do it! I read on the (now defunct but still great) blog The Rules Revisited about that and how sometimes you do just need to push your comfort zone to look your best. I think he was talking about heels specifically. I was that way with makeup. I don't even wear much, but I still had to get used to my made up face.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 08:35 PM
1

Yeah maybe it was! Seems like people don't so much follow that rule these days.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 03:35 PM
2

Haha thanks! It's taken awhile to learn to wrangle the beast that is my hair. But yeah, I know what you mean, if it just isn't your style. But if you like that stuff, you may just not be used to wearing it and would get used to it. But maybe too it's just not for you.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 03:33 PM
1

Hard to say without knowing what you look like, but I think the 50s style cinched-waist dresses look good on all women! Miniskirts, it sort of depends. Those styles are most flattering on me. As for the hair, I have big hair and I've learned to embrace it!
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 02:47 AM
2

He's good looking either way, but definitely hotter with the wild mane and beard. He should have agreed to do it only if she lost 75lbs.
/r/TheRedPill24/02/17 02:42 AM
5

Wow! Keep it up! It's hard to break old habits. Glad you're already seeing the positive change.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 02:07 AM
2

I agree with the lipstick thing. I like the way the red lip + winged eyeliner looks on some women, but when I try it, I always look way overdone (or in less delicate language, a $2 hooker). I have big eyes and full lips, so when I highlight one I really have to downplay the other. Also pencil eyebrows were the worst.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 01:58 AM
2

I wish black/green/blue lipstick would go away NOW. Plus anything 80s inspired (except for big hair!). I also hate the undercut (I used to like one and have one, but now they're just offensive to my eyes). I love that big butts are in (not exactly fashion, I know), and I really like wedge heels. Skinny jeans are also the best too. I used to sew my own to emulate my punk icons back before they were in style (buying them is much easier). Honestly though I prefer fashion from the 40s, 50s, and 60s.…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/17 01:45 AM
1

I don't think they have it. I'm from a hunting family. You can sometimes find venison though, and definitely lamb, which the recipe was intended for.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/17 06:34 PM
7

Those ones always stick with you the best ;). Hang in there. Every mistake is a lesson that will help you later in life. Everyone on this sub has made them.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 09:02 PM
2

Ooh, something to make your hair grow faster? My hair grows at an agonizing pace of 1/2in per month. I want hair down to my butt but right now it's just past my shoulders. I'd love something that would make it grow faster.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 06:45 PM
3

"Now he will do a hobby of his if I tell him to." ~cringe~
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 06:35 PM
1

I've been meaning to make a four-hour braised elk roast (based on Ina Garten's 4 hr lamb). It's braised with garlic and white wine and makes even the toughest game fall apart. So tasty! Probably mashed potatoes to go with it. You can do any red meat with this recipe.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 06:23 PM
1

Ooh I love hummus sandwiches!
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 03:50 PM
1

RP theory definitely falls in the camp of not playing the field as a woman. Most guys really aren't looking for a lot of experience in a lady, and many like to date younger. My SO is 5 years older and it's been my best match by far. I think your mom is wrong on this one. Earlier in my relationship I made the stupid mistake of listening to some older women telling me to play the field, and it's the only regret I have in life. It wasn't cheating, but I wasn't being true to myself or respecting mys…
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 03:47 PM
35

Improper vetting. Being in a relationship, especially married, should be an immediate "next" for you. I don't care how many times they say they're going to leave their wife.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 03:37 PM
1

Agreed! Character is more important IMO.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 03:32 PM
1

I don't think I'm crying wolf though... I mean it's not like I'm saying my SO is hitting me. I'll say, he was mad last night because X happened. I acted like X and I think I should have acted like X. But male anger is seen as unilaterally abusive these days, and female responsibility is seen as abuse.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 03:28 PM
1

Yeah. It doesn't affect me like that so much anymore, but when you're young you don't realize what's affecting you. And when you see half naked women being praised for acting like a slut, and then you turn around and see a movie where affection is deemed "crazy," you're beginning to have a recipe for endless hookups.
/r/TheRedPill22/02/17 03:26 PM
1

You know I was thinking about that, and I can't exactly pinpoint it. I know for sure the media plays a big role. The ever-enduring crazy girlfriend/ex girlfriend trope. I romantic comedies don't have that message, but they're also talked about as fantasy. Music and music videos contribute too (all the pu$$y centered lyrics). You almost never see functional relationships in the media. I'm sure I've gotten the message from other women, but I can't recall and exact instance.
/r/TheRedPill22/02/17 12:48 AM
2

And woops! Usually I proofread, but I was in a hurry. And yes, they way overdiagnose abuse. It's frustrating when you're talking about a problem and admit some fault and then the next thing you know you're being advised to end your LTR. I've learned to not talk about my relationship with most people.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/17 12:39 AM
3

One of my best friends in the world is actually an SJW. She's not vicious though like some of them are. We became friends in high school before politics was a big deal to either of us, lived together in college, and have been through many highs and lows together. In college we were mostly on the same page politically (even tho I used to be an SJW, I always had some conservative.leanings), but once I graduated, I started becoming more and more RP. And then I actually discovered TRP a year later. …
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/17 09:58 PM
3

That's amazing! It changes everything. It's way more empowering than feminism has ever been as it blames "the patriarchy." It's so crazy, but sometimes I've gotten the reaction that I'm a battered woman when talking about issues in my relationship and mentioning things that I've done to create the problem. But hey, at the end of the day I'm in a good relationship. You can only get better from here, and you can always improve. You're also lucky to have a man who accepted you as a mess. Now he'll …
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/17 07:37 PM
3

Curious--what motivates you as an already married man to spend time on a women's sub dispensing helpful advice to strangers? I'm glad you do, but I just wonder why.
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/17 07:29 PM
1

I know. It's really sad. Women aren't evil. We've been lied to just like y'all have. And then no one wins.
/r/TheRedPill21/02/17 07:17 PM
3

Well there's (clearly) a lot of self sabotaging behavior on our part. I was always sent messages that guys really only ever want sex and that the idea of commitment is clingy and would send them running. Luckily I liked the guys I've been in LTRs with enough to bring up commitment so that it overpowered my social conditioning, and every time they were enthusiastic.
/r/TheRedPill21/02/17 05:20 PM
1

I definitely am not saying women are the weaker sex. You are jumping to conclusions. I do believe (and this is the foremost tenet of TRP) that men and women are inherently different and requires different romantic and sexual strategies for success. It's not just what I think either. Men and women respond in different ways, and what works for one group does not for the other. A main failing of feminism is the idea that equality means exactly the same. I don't believe one sex is superior to anothe…
/r/TheRedPill20/02/17 11:30 PM
1

Your thinking like a RP man, not a RP woman. Women can't spin plates and be happy like guys can. At least not most women. For her it's clearly not viable because she wants something more than sex.
/r/TheRedPill19/02/17 03:20 PM
7

Her reaction to hookup culture is a natural female reaction. For most of us, sleeping around is unfulfilling and emotionally damaging. I don't think oneitis works for women the same way it works for a man. I guess in a sense that is what she has, because she expects this guy to be different and commit even though she's doing the same old thing. The problem is her expectations, but the solution isn't deadening her instincts for intimacy and commitment.
/r/TheRedPill19/02/17 04:20 AM
124

Notice her reaction to not being fulfilled by hookup culture isn't "how can I change my behavior so I can get a good man to commit" it's "how do I emotionally damage myself to the point where I can fully suppress my emotions?"
/r/TheRedPill18/02/17 09:37 PM
2

Okay, I think I understand what you're getting at a little better now. I definitely know a lot of women who approach dating with the "I should be married already" mentality. It's a general attitude of entitlement. Then again, I don't think there's anything wrong with advertising that you're looking for a serious relationship. That's just part of vetting. If I were ever to go back on the market and date (may that never be the case) I would make it clear that I'm looking for an LTR. Telling a guy …
/r/RedPillWomen18/02/17 05:10 AM
19

Just to clarify, are you saying that some women consider former sexual partners as "time served" and expect to be rewarded by their current partner for it?
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/17 07:50 PM
1

I must be such a weird nerd. (Not trying to argue your main point, because I've observed it in many women). I talk to my boyfriend about politics all the time, and there's nothing I love discussing more than culture. Of course I value our playful banter too, but I like that we can bounce ideas off of each other.
/r/TheRedPill17/02/17 07:37 PM
2

I agree that socialization can be found in many avenues. And thank goodness that's all just a "her" problem! She's just the only example I'd ever met, and she's not a good role model for any behavior.
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/17 01:28 AM
1

My first instinct is that he's cheating. A change like this would have to come from a pretty dramatic behavior change from one of you, and it sounds like you haven't changed anything (5lbs is nothing). He's spending time away from home, suddenly has endless complaints about a previously happy marriage... He may not be cheating, but as another user said, it sounds like he's comparing you to someone else. I'd confront him about his behaviour change and make sure to emphasize that he never had/expr…
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/17 01:23 AM
3

You know I never thought about this but I could see it being a good idea. More focus. Then again I have a friend who went to all girl's school and ended up having a weird relationship with men...She started out being really awkward around guys, especially since she is naturally timid. She had a weird internet-only LDR for a year or two in high school, and when she got to college was still awkward around them. Eventually she did get a boyfriend (H.S. friend of mine) and she treated him poorly, wa…
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/17 01:05 AM
1

OMG congratulations!
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/17 06:58 PM
4

Don't wanna get egged for your romantic gift!
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/17 06:56 PM
1

Yay! I hope you enjoy. We just ate it tonight. P:
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/17 03:18 AM
3

Spicy Cashew Noodle Salad 1 small bunch cilantro (about 3 tbsp chopped) 3 green onions, chopped 1 lb thin spaghetti 1 cup cashews, chopped For Sauce 1/2 c cashew butter 1/2 tsp garlic powder 3 tbsp soy sauce 1 tbsp rice vinegar 1 tbsp toasted sesame oil 1 tsp red pepper flakes Directions Bring salted water to a boil. Add spaghetti and cook until all dente (~8min, depending on the spaghetti). Drain, reserving about 1/4 cup pasta water. While spaghetti cooks, chop the cilantro and green onions. Mi…
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/17 01:37 AM
2

I agree that you gain nothing from sleeping around except for some mild regret. My n-count is not as high as many, but I've had a lot of "experience" that added no value to my life, sometimes made me feel bad about myself, and that I would take back if I could. If you're so worried about not knowing what's out there, date (not sleep with) a lot of guys. If you LTR a good guy and you're not sexually compatible, you can always break it off. Way better to have 1 or 2 trial relationships if you have…
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 10:48 PM
2

No problem! I love seafood, and it's so easy to make delicious. Just don't overcook it!
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 10:42 PM
2

You need to chill! Sounds like you're already very fit and are worried for no reason. I don't think you should focus on numbers rankings, but so you know, if you're fit you are at bare minimum a 5 unless you're weirdly deformed. I've certainly read on TRP based websites that only 8+ are relationship material. I've also read it's better to LTR 6s and 7s because they're less crazy. I've also read that 10s don't even exist. And from real guys in real life looking for an LTR, most would be happy wit…
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 10:02 PM
2

Break up!
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 06:16 AM
2

I love shrimp scampi (super easy), gumbo, white wine garlic sauces for mussels and clams as well as shrimp (you can pair this with pasta or not), lobster and crab you just boil lightly and serve with butter or another sauce. If you don't want to go the European route, there's always Asian dishes like fresh spring rolls with shrimp, Kung Pao shrimp, curries. Seafood can shine in very simple recipes, so there are a lot of good places to start.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 06:14 AM
1

Very cool! Deeper meaning.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 06:08 AM
4

Spicy cashew noodles salad! It's a cold Asian noodle dish with cashew butter and soy sauce and spices. Very tasty. It's vegan, but can easily be upgraded with chicken, shrimp, eggs etc.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 12:17 AM
1

Wow. Crazy stuff.
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/17 12:29 AM
1

I love Miss Congeniality! Some good life lessons. You don't have to be coarse and unattractive to be strong.
/r/RedPillWomen12/02/17 08:49 PM
1

Is it really >10000 years?? I always knew it was a long time, but I thought it was a year or two...
/r/RedPillWomen12/02/17 08:47 PM
3

Glad to hear of your success!
/r/RedPillWomen12/02/17 08:45 PM
5

Sounds like he has serious confidence issues. Only he should find you beautiful...asked you to gain weight...insists on you wearing sweatpants and leaving your hair messy... He is trying to ugly you up. There's a big difference between a natural look and looking like a bum, and he's trying to get you to do the latter. It seems like he's trying to lower your SMV and confidence so you don't run off on him. And no, RPW isn't about giving up things that really matter to you in order to please a man.…
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 11:39 PM
3

I don't know that I would/should push a man to be alpha at the beginning of a relationship, but one thing we do talk a lot about here on the sub is encouraging your man to lead if you'rei in a relationship with or married to a beta. Things like incorporating The Surrendered Wife into your relationship. There's also an article in the sidebar called When Your Man Won't Lead or something to that effect So we know it's possible. It's more a question of when it's appropriate.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 07:31 PM
1

You probably both have things you need to work on, but that doesn't justify his behaviour. Also, if you could actually convince him to get help, they'd have to report it to the police, because it is domestic violence.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 07:19 PM
3

Nope, never. He did suggest that my former roller derby playing wasn't his favorite since my body got battered so much and it was hard for him to watch. He was worried about my physical well-being, but he never once told me to stop. He basically said "Do what you want" and always has. He's very supportive and trusts me to make decisions for what's best for me. Needless to say he's a little more excited about my taking up the cello :P However, if he brought up a problem that really affected the c…
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 01:25 PM
3

I know this post is deleted, but get help and leave IMMEDIATELY. There's no such thing as "a relationship with some abuse" that is not an abusive relationship. You only submit to those who are worthy and will always protect you. And submission does not involve violence. This is not a pro battered women's sub.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 01:17 PM
1

I think a lot of the classrooms I worked in were mixed because the schools were so small. Most of the kids you couldn't tell they were even different at all. And kids are so sweet at that age. I deal with high schoolers mostly, who I get along with well but who are nowhere near as sweet!
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 01:10 PM
1

That's awesome! I am in awe of people like you. I've subbed in those classrooms, and it can be a challenge. Not usually bad (though I didn't love the diapers).
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 01:59 AM
1

I'm a substitute teacher about to get my master's in public health. Thinking about being an epidemiologist.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/17 01:54 AM
3

Oh my gosh, that is so sad. The really depressing part is that, I think, with a whisper, any one of us could answer the real question they have--"Why am I alone?" Of course, it would take much longer to fix all of those issues. I don't much like feminists, but I still hate to see how much their ideology makes them suffer.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 10:13 PM
8

Hahaha hot girl blindness! Hilarious. I agree that it is not only counterproductive for women but is also very anti-man. Literally any failure in the woman's life is because a man somewhere just "can't handle it."
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 10:11 PM
3

I don't think the self was factored into the hierarchy. I agree and disagree though when it comes to you coming first. On one hand, I fully believe that one's mental and physical well-being are paramount to being a supportive partner/mother etc (something I've learned the very hard way :( ), but on the other hand I believe sacrifice is critical to strong intimate relationships. And that involves being able to put others first at times. Like everything, it's a balance. Also, TRP isn't usually gea…
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 05:52 PM
5

Yeah true. The Ann Coulters of the world are very valuable to us all. This is only a problem if the Ann Coulters really want a loving relationship, in which case they will need to adjust and make sacrifices in their work lives.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 05:47 PM
4

Agreed. Honestly I do consider myself a strong independent woman, but I definitely think I am way better off with my good man.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 05:46 PM
2

Absolutely! I meant to include that one in my explanation. Will edit! I completely agree though. No family (spouse and SO included) should ever come after work on your list of priorities. People are the most important, and you should honor and cherish your spouse, not tell him that he's less important than the quarterly report.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/17 04:08 PM
3

So simple it just might actually work.
/r/RedPillWomen05/02/17 11:29 PM
1

5 yrs older. Current SO. We met when we were 20 and 25. We get along very well and I appreciate his added calmness, perspective, and maturity. I'm not sure I'll date anyone my age again. It could be different now that I'm older (and therefore guys my age are older). That being said, people make jokes about him robbing the cradle and I've heard from a few people that they think it's creepy to have that big of an age difference. Clearly I disagree, but I can't imagine myself being with someone mor…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/17 04:02 AM
1

Absolutely! I'm always trying to teach people to cook when they are interested. It's such a crucial life skill.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/17 01:22 AM
1

I am an excellent cook. (Glad to see so many people have this one on their list!) I've been cooking for 14 of my 25 years, and have mastered many aspects of baking and many different styles of cooking. I am easygoing and adaptable. I can get along with almost anybody without being insincere. My SO once likened me to to water, able to take the shape of any container it occupies. I am always looking to improve myself. Always learning new recipes, will be going for a master's degree in the fall, an…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/17 12:40 AM
1

You can do it! I used to have most of these problems, especially low self esteem and lack of social skills, and I have definitely gotten over them. Not so sure about the height though. You may still grow, but there's not much you can do about it if you don't. Being a little short isn't a bad thing though--easier to find a man who is bigger and stronger! Also, with the stomach flab...I wish you the best of luck, because mine is an eternal reality. I don't say that because I don't want to work for…
/r/RedPillWomen31/01/17 01:51 AM
1

Are you my boyfriend's mom? Really though haha. I don't think she'd be on Reddit tho, let alone RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen31/01/17 12:20 AM
1

This is definitely something I need to hear! I'm about to turn 25 in a week, and with all the RP stuff I read, I'm halfway expecting to turn into a prune on the day of my birthday! I keep thinking, surely I'm not through. Plus, I looked really baby-faced when I was 20 and have gotten a more attractive with age because of it (or so my SO thinks).
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/17 06:11 AM
4

Well everyone has to have their boundaries. Even whores have things they won't do. I'm surprised you say that you would rather have your SO cheat on you than make you cook red meat...that seems pretty unusual. You know yourself though and what your priorities are.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/17 10:12 PM
2

Oh yeah, I'd say any major shift like that in a relationship would take 6mo-a year to fully take hold. Especially with men I think. They know we women can sometimes be temperamental, so they tend to watch our behavior over time.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/17 12:11 AM
8

Yes and yes! There's no law that says you have to have children. Being a mother figure is more about nurturing than children, to your man as well as to any little ones. And if he cooks better, that's fine. You can chop things, wash dishes etc. And maybe have him teach you to cook some things for fun sometime!
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/17 01:15 AM
2

In that case I'd just give him time and keep reassuring him. Tell him you trust him, tell him he's the man of the house, tell him it would make you happiest to please him. He's probably still just waiting for the sh*t storm when he makes a "wrong" move and is treading lightly. How long have you been STFUing?
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/17 01:12 AM
2

I love her! Definitely an aspiration.
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/17 11:04 PM
2

I know many people are saying not to post on sites to determine SMV, but I'd be a hypocrite if I said this because I recently did just that out of perverse curiosity and posted on hot or not. To get an accurate number, give it a.few days and make sure you have a couple body shots (at least butt up). I forgot a body shot at first, and once I loaded one my rating shot up a point. Your body is a big part of your SMV and you can't get an accurate rating without it. Don't forget what other users said…
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/17 02:33 PM
2

I agree that you should reassure him when he keeps questioning you. If he asks"why is it just up to me" say "because you're the man of the house" or something to that effect. However, don't mistake delegation for him shirking from responsibility. He probably doesn't want to make every single decision every day (like what to have for dinner) and probably would like you to manage some decisions around the house (what groceries are needed, what the kids' schedules should be, paying bills). He will …
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/17 02:21 PM
2

I've almost always been the one to bring up commitment, and it's always gone well. I think this is a case of you projecting what you'd want from a man onto behaviours you think you should exhibit. It's well established in RP theory that women prefer "preselection" (the man has women already interested in him, proving his value) and "abundance mentality" (not seeming too desperate because of access to other women). Men do not value this the same way and tend to see a bunch of orbiters as potentia…
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 09:32 PM
1

Awesome! I bet they were delicious.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 05:30 PM
1

Yum
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 04:11 PM
1

I love a good salad for lunch (or dinner)!
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 04:11 PM
1

Yum, steak! Tastes even better when camping I'm sure!
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 04:09 PM
1

I am going to attempt to make gyros with taziki sauce and homemade pita bread this week! I've made the sauce and the pita, but never the gyros. Also making tacos, and easy and delicious standby.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 04:08 PM
2

Ooh, ham (if you're using it) and beans is one of my favorite comfort foods. Goes great with rice or cornbread. What I like to do is take a ham bone from a ham that's been eaten for several days and put it in a crock pot with the beans for several hours. It makes a delicious healthy broth. If you don't have a ham bone you can sometimes buy one at the store. If not use chicken broth.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 04:07 PM
6

Very true. Many many don't deserve this and many women are very far from achieving (or even wanting to achieve) it.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 01:40 PM
10

My passion against feminism is clear. My opinion on the march goes between indifferent to slightly frustrated. Not a big variance.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 04:25 AM
6

This.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 01:58 AM
7

I am supremely indifferent. I don't think it was necessary, I wasn't offended by it, nothing. I didn't even know what they were marching for. I even asked on my Facebook what people were representing since I know many people who participated. I got many answers, and the vision only got more fragmented the more people who responded. I guess I am slightly frustrated that this happened since I think feminism needs to die a swift death, and a lot of the things they are protesting are based on false …
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 01:57 AM
10

Thank you! And you're very right about the god vs. insect thing. The contrast is amazing but it's so true when you look around at failing (and successful) relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 01:53 AM
5

Thanks, I really appreciate your post! I'm happy that I've improved my confidence over the years, because it's much easier to believe that I might gasp be enough. Mind-blowing. It's so easy to think that no one woman can ever be enough and fall into insecurity.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/17 01:51 AM
8

He doesn't need a more beautiful woman if you're fulfilling him. Good to know! Maybe that should be a no-brainer, but in my mind I'm always thinking it would be better if I were more beautiful, even though my SO is attracted to me.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/17 05:28 PM
2

I wouldn't worry about not being sexy if you're bad at CrossFit. He will probably find it endearing if you're clumsy, especially since that gives him the chance to show of how good at CrossFit he is. Also you probably don't look nearly as gross when you sweat as you think. Try to wear nice workout clothes if you have them (just something that flatters your figure). Maybe add a little waterproof mascara if you're worried about being dressed down. If you really think you need to study to pass the …
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 10:58 PM
2

You're welcome! I'm sure if you're happy like it sounds like you are, you have that glow ;)
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 10:48 PM
3

I have never read The Rules, but there is a now defunct blog based on the book called The Rules Revisited that I do highly recommend. It has many posts about comportment, self care, presentation etc. from a man's perspective that I found very helpful.
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 04:47 PM
4

I have very few close female friends, but then again I have very few close friends period. I have two women I have known for nearly 10 years, and we have been through thick and thin. We barely get to see one another, but I don't think I could easily find a similar level of friendship where I am. One of these ladies is happily married, the other one in a LTR of many years. The one in the LTR has some relationship issues, mostly related to her internal conflicts over being a modern woman vs. surre…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 04:38 PM
1

I used to be really uncomfortable being vocal and direct in bed. It just takes practice, and the longer you're with your partner the easier it gets. And the more you practice getting out of your head the better and easier it gets.
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 04:22 PM
2

Great way of putting it! I think another thing to emphasize is that truly slutty behavior is about doing these things with many men, not the man you're committed to. And does your fiance look at you differently? Probably, but in a good way! In an "I can't keep my hands off of that" way. He certainly has not lost any respect for you if that's what you're worried about. The vast majority of men want a woman who's a prude for everyone else and a slut for them. Make sure you go slow and that he prop…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 04:08 PM
4

Wow, 17 years! That's amazing!
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 03:45 AM
3

I'm not in college, but I am in a LDR! Stay strong! It's worth it for the right man.
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 03:43 AM
2

Welcome to RPW! I used to be very much like you, and I recommend you practice, practice, practice! Practice talking to people--start with women and men you're not attracted to (sounds mean but it's true). And then move on to men you're interested in. The stakes are lower and rejection (which will probably be few and far between) will hurt less. I used to be really shy and have no confidence, and now I'm neither of those! I have confidence in myself, in part from throwing myself into the fire whe…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/17 03:31 AM
2

I love hearing stories like yours! Congratulations on the great relationship!
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 06:41 PM
3

As my boyfriend likes to say, I wasn't an ugly duckling so much as an awkward gosling haha. I guess you could call me a late bloomer, especially when it comes to social development. And I dress in between what you're describing. Nice, feminine skirts and such, nothing prudish but nothing too revealing either. I guess I'm trying to signal class.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 06:36 PM
5

It doesn't bother me. I was just curious since my bf actually brought it up. Maybe I do put off the "not interested like that signals," which is good because it saves a lot of trouble.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:03 PM
2

Not particularly. I think I'm about average.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:01 PM
1

Fair enough.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 04:44 AM
2

Well the reason I brought it up to begin with was that my boyfriend asked the other day something to the effect of "why do people not treat you like you're hot?" I've read that hotness correlates with approaches, so I was just curious. It honestly makes my life easier that more guys don't approach me. I also like having objective opinions, hence the Hot or Not, which I've already taken down. I see it as more of a scientific thing.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 04:14 AM
1

No prob. I thought that may be the case.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 04:10 AM
1

I'd like to read your other post about cherry picking the good parts. This is very interesting, and while I saw a couple of tactics in there that could apply, most of it fall into the categories of "not possible" and "pure evil." I'm definitely interested in girl game, even when it comes to an LTR. I'll keep a lookout.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:57 AM
1

Content?
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:26 AM
1

I definitely used to, but I've worked a lot on this and mostly don't have that problem anymore. It's scary to express your real emotions and be vulnerable!
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:23 AM
1

It's hard, I won't lie. But it's necessary, and it's worth it to not give up the relationship. Some people are worth the sacrifice IMO.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:10 AM
1

Oh my god, what a nightmare! Amazing about the engagement though. And it's so great to be able to walk into an Indian grocery and buy the spices, know what they are, and make delicious food at home. I've spent years attempting and falling short trying to make delicious Indian food, but this recipe is really good.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:07 AM
8

Welcome to TRP! I was also raised to be a good son even though I'm definitely a daughter. I used to try to be one of the guys all the time. I did always have a boyfriend, but I got friend-zoned by a lot of guys too. I still retain a lot of those values (high-achieving, self-sufficient etc) but I've tried to tone down my bro tendencies, my cursing, and and I've worked a lot on being friendlier and more easygoing. You can work to become one of those girls! Or are least close to one (in my case).
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/17 03:02 AM
6

Definitely agree on this one. I'm currently in a LDR with a partner who is physically ill, so we are apart most of the time and then when I visit we aren't always able to have sex. I really miss sex and intimacy. It's been at least 6 months since we've slept together. It's hard, and I really long for sex and the closeness, but I have chosen to be in a relationship with him, so that's the sacrifice I make. This will sound really corny, and I hate when people say stuff like this, but I think it ap…
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/17 08:45 PM
2

I understand completely. Doing long distance now myself.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/17 06:29 PM
4

Great post. Back when I was blue pill, I hung out with guys all the time including my exes, when I was in a relationship (often with my bf present). I thought men and women could be "just friends" and that if a guy hadn't directly asked me out, that's all that he wanted. I even had friends reprimand and shame me when I'd say "I think so and so has a thing for me." Eventually I started seeing the truth, and I now really shy away from male friendship. I still think it's okay to have guy "group fri…
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/17 06:29 PM
1

Many of us are :-(
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 07:43 PM
2

Glad the RPW tenets worked for you! If I had to guess, everything has been an adjustment for him and things will go back to normal. Having a baby involved changes your roles. Plus, you still have the weight to lose. Also, if the baby is sleeping in the bed with you, that's bound to put him off. If he didn't want sex with a baby inside you, he definitely won't want sex with a baby next to you. That being said, taking care of your appearance in the meantime will help a lot.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 07:42 PM
4

I got a message calling me a cunt and a cum dumpster/rag on my first post. Good times. Don't think it was someone from this sub though.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 07:38 PM
4

Actually the definition of hypergamy is "dating up." Hyper=over gamy=marriage. The result of this can sometimes be branch swinging or seeking out another partner, always looking to improve your partner choice.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 07:22 PM
1

Sounds delicious!
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 07:18 PM
1

Ooh, I love venison stew! Also I am shocked that diet coke works as a soup base.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 06:38 PM
2

I made an amazing Chicken Tikka Masala dish. Recipe. I used my broiler instead of a grill with delicious results.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 06:36 PM
2

TRP in no way states that you must sacrifice a career to be a stay at home mom. It does say that many women find this option more fulfilling, but it's not a hard and fast rule. To be a RPW you don't have to follow a formula for how your life should go. TRP is about understanding the truth of male/female relationships, not providing a step by step list of how to live your life.
/r/RedPillWomen16/01/17 07:41 PM
1

Great response, especially about boundaries. Healthy boundaries are the only thing that allows long term coping and support. And you're right about withdrawing. He will notice and interpret it as you rejecting him. If you're able to maintain healthy boundaries though, you won't need to withdraw to protect yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen14/01/17 08:44 PM
1

The situation I'm dealing with is an illness. An undiagnosed protracted illness at that. I've had to learn endurance coping and I've really had to learn that taking care and time for yourself mentally really is important if you want to support someone. If you're not a little bit selfish sometimes, you'll fall apart all the time.
/r/RedPillWomen14/01/17 08:41 PM
1

It's definitely something I got better at over time (unfortunately). Sometimes I do still cry when people are relating their problems even though I used to be very awkward and not react. Many people just see this as you caring and don't take it badly. If you can manage, try to remember to separate their pain from yours. If you can do that, it's easier to provide sympathy and advice when they need it.
/r/RedPillWomen14/01/17 08:39 PM
1

Human relationships will always be more interesting than work or academics. That's what I would tell the author. I don't think what she's talking about is a specifically female issue either. While a man's family may be far more happy for him when he lands a great job than if it were their daughter, the joy comes from the prospect of him being able to support a family and his parents when they age. No one is really that excited that he's working on an oil rig. They're excited that their grandkids…
/r/RedPillWomen14/01/17 02:09 AM
1

You remind me so much of my boyfriend's mom! (That's a good thing.) She has many goats too :)
/r/RedPillWomen14/01/17 01:12 AM
2

I'd give him the chance to take it over, and then maybe after a couple of months check in and see if he prefers managing it himself or delegating. It seems like you are hesitant and don't trust the idea of your husband managing your finances. If he seems reluctant, it may be because he senses your lack of trust. Let him give it a shot. If he decides he wants to delegate, then go back to how things were. Laura Doyle may know a lot, but you have to adjust for your situation.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/17 08:50 PM
3

This depresses me a lot too. However I think conservatism is having a renaissance. At least I hope so. I like to read the website Return of Kings (surprising, I know. It is RP) because much of the site focuses on traditional values, relationships, and fostering masculinity. That and coming here to RPW and hearing the perspective of you lovely ladies!
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/17 01:08 AM
1

I'll refer you to an old blog I love that touches on this: http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2014/10/fat-women-look-hotter-in-tight-clothes.html?m=1 The author is a male and he says you should. My answer is definitely yes. At the end of the day you will still look more feminine which is the goal. Looking good when you're bigger will also motivate you to keep losing. Even though your SMV will increase as you lose weight, it will still be increased by your dressing in a feminine manner.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/17 08:47 PM
5

This is something I've had a lot of experience with in the past couple of years. Staying focused on my confidence that he will overcome this huge obstacle helps me worry less. I also have to get more emotional support outside of him--from my mom, sister, friends etc. I try really hard not to let him see how worried I am, at least not very often. Sometimes being strong for him involved carving time out of my schedule to just go cry alone somewhere. I know it sounds sad, but it really helped to re…
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/17 06:57 PM
3

I agree! I certainly don't think sex is a waste of energy. I guess some people don't like it, but I'm definitely not in that camp! I certainly understand the different levels of risk for men and women, but that doesn't mean it isn't enjoyable for both parties.
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/17 10:14 PM
5

-save lots of money for grad school -lose the last 5-10lbs I gained when on a medication I'm now off -get my book published darn it! -achieve clear skin --Master the casual feminine look some other people are referencing
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/17 10:09 PM
3

Where can I find this Queen Bee Hair so shiny article? Just through the Googles? I've been working on getting my hair shinier.
/r/RedPillWomen23/12/16 10:20 PM
9

I totally had the same problem growing up--thinking women and all things girly were frivolous or inferior. For me this came from my dad having stronger role in my upbringing, and he valued masculine virtues. This led to me hanging out with guys, and I eventually misinterpreted their comments on women (dude she's crazy, ugh it takes her forever to get ready etc) as them thinking women were just a pain and should be more like men. Wrong. Sure there are annoyances, but men have their share too. I h…
/r/RedPillWomen23/12/16 07:40 PM
9

I wouldn't worry too much about what they say over at TRP. I read their stuff all the time, but I'm only able to because I've got a thick skin, a great boyfriend that loves me, and I've hung out with guys a lot in the past. TRP represents a large group of very jaded men who have been burned by many women in the past. They are simply trying to figure out how to identify and prioritize their own needs after coming in last for a long time. The other thing about TRP is that, as with most forums wher…
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/16 05:38 PM
2

This is hilarious
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/16 07:09 PM
1

Your experience is very encouraging after hearing so much about how it's all downhill for women after 25. Clearly that's a gross simplification (with truth in it of course), but it's still nice to hear success stories. I'm happily in a relationship, but if god forbid something happened, I wouldn't want to be alone.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/16 05:50 AM
8

You're right, it doesn't serve RP women. But getting raped doesn't serve RPW either. RP is about the realities of the sexual and romantic marketplace, and sometimes those realities are harsh. Having an arm chopped off would make it harder for a woman to get a man too. That'd just the reality of it. Here at RPW we try to dish up reality, because reality allows us to make the best possible choices to find a mate in our circumstances.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/16 12:21 AM
4

Couldn't have said it better myself.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/16 12:14 AM
1

I'd definitely take this up with you're Dr. Sounds like you're still at a healthy weight, but maybe it's just not the weight you want to be at. I'd proceed with caution since you have a eating disorder. You have a little wiggle room to lose weight, but in my mind it's better to have a slightly higher (but still healthy) BMI than have a relapse.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/16 08:29 PM
10

Absolutely true. This is an epic shit test that we in America must not fail because it's destroying the Western world. We must not let these savages win.
/r/TheRedPill14/12/16 11:13 PM
1

Maybe he hasn't dealt with whatever this trauma is and is unfairly/unintentionally taking it out on you? Men deal with emotional hurdles differently, so maybe what works for you doesn't work for him. Perhaps he is jealous of your progress because he wants to get there himself but doesn't know how. I don't know exactly how men deal with trauma, but I've heard getting out and doing things, especially with a close male companion, helps a lot. Something where they feel like they're working together …
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/16 04:03 PM
28

I've done some pretty thorough reading of male RP theory, and while many over on /r/TheRedPill are very bitter and just want to have casual sex, there are some men actually looking for a relationship and for relationship advice. What those guys talk about I think is called "soft dread." This consists mostly of your woman knowing you are attracted to other women (which every guy on the planet is) and knowing that he isn't desperate and that without you he wouldn't be foreveralone. This makes him …
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/16 03:46 PM
3

I don't think I'm a traditional conservative. That makes me think of neocons which I'm definitely not. I'm a former progressive liberal who has been red pilled over the last year and half. So I consider myself somewhere in the alt-right I suppose (not the Nazi type). I think traditional gender roles are important for fostering mutual respect, admiration, and love. Flipping these roles too much starts to breed contempt and dissatisfaction. I know this from personal experience. Men and women respo…
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/16 01:31 AM
1

True fact. We automatically sort people a lot more thoroughly than I realized.
/r/TheRedPill08/12/16 01:52 PM
5

Wow, seeing boys change to men and fluff balls to hot bods. It's amazing how you can practically see the testosterone in a man's jaw line.
/r/TheRedPill08/12/16 04:30 AM
2

Wow, that stinks. I haven't really been to forthcoming with a lot of people, but I've mentioned stuff to my closest friends. One is more traditional so she reacted pretty well, and the other one is a pretty staunch feminist, but she has conflict in her heart. So even though she poo-pooed it, she considered what I said. Either way we're still friends and they don't think I hate women, so that's a win.
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/16 07:19 PM
2

Haha totally! I miss skating so much but definitely not the attitudes and infighting. And hopefully they have mellowed out a bit.
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/16 04:55 PM
16

OMG! Another former roller derby player! That's awesome. I played for 3 years and agree it's probably the most feminist sport. I also love Girl Writes What. As for navigating friendships...I usually keep my mouth shut unless it's something I feel is really important. One instance w/ my derby teammates, a gal was talking about her husband like a child, saying he was helpless and that you just need to treat men like crap etc. She was sort of looking for me to commiserate, and I just said something…
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/16 11:58 PM
3

Maintain 5x/week workouts with new work schedule. Lose the 10lbs I thought I already lost (poorly calibrated scale...) Pay off car Make Christmas candy and send to friends and family.
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/16 11:45 PM
2

Yeah, most liberal men are. There are the rare ones (usually older) who maybe own their own design firm and have traveled the world and have a wine cellar and all that (i.e. liberal alphas tend to be rich from what I've observed). Not really my style or very common, but for the liberal ladies out there that do exist.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/16 06:51 PM
11

Older is always better, trust me. Age gives life/experiential knowledge that gives a man confidence and authority that isn't something that can be replaced by book smarts. And smart/brawny guys are out there. I found one. Not to toot my own horn, but I'm quite smart--but he is even smarter. Have you looked at rednecks? They value traditional masculinity, and if you find a smart one you can often find a guy who is book smart and knowledgeable about handiwork/carving/other sexy masculine hobbies.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/16 12:31 AM
1

I find that acquaintances interpret me talking about self improvements as direct criticism. Especially if I already have a better lifestyle (i.e. eating mostly home-cooked meals) but want to improve (i.e. cut down on sugar). People also get very touchy if I say I'm trying to lose weight since I'm not overweight. I guess they think if someone like me feels the need to improve, it only highlights how far behind they are. So I've learned to keep my mouth shut. I only tell my two oldest/best friends…
/r/TheRedPill27/11/16 06:33 PM
4

Oh my god it was so guilty! I do love a compelling, strong female character, but not one who has no struggle whatsoever and who breezes through every trial without a second thought.
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/16 06:09 AM
7

My problem with the movie doesn't really have to do with her winning the case, and I know it's based on a true story. My problem is the movie portrays cursing, and explosive temper, single motherhood, and multiple divorces as heroic. It worked out for Ms. Brockovitch, but these qualities lower your SMV and RMV significantly according to the RP worldview. Maybe those were supposed to make her look more accomplished as hurdles to overcome, but they're still placed in the context of a beautiful her…
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/16 07:24 PM
7

Oh snap. Well that's good. I'm happy to be wrong.
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/16 07:18 PM
4

Congrats on your feminine maturity! I love hearing stories of families with standards. Too often these days people mistake proper discipline and tough (but achievable) standards for abuse, all the while they raise fat, lazy brats.
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/16 03:48 AM
1

To me it sorta seems like some combo of cultural conditioning and personal habit. I've realized over the years that men like cuddling and hand-holding and the like just as much as we do, but are culturally told they should just be I interested in sex. I would keep initiating and don't worry about him not being interested. What made me feel rejected in the past was thinking my bf didn't want to do it since he didn't initiate hand holding, but once I realized he liked it I was a lot more willing t…
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/16 01:32 AM
7

This is more my own opinion than a RP opinion, but I don't like plastic surgery, particularly big things like boob or butt implants (they really don't feel like the real thing. Believe me, I've tested it). That being said, I could understand the logic behind a breast reduction or lift. And what you're thinking of sounds like it's more minor. I've certainly seen celebrities who've gotten very tasteful work done, and some who've totally botched their natural beauty. I'd say it's up to you and your…
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 07:49 PM
2

Okay so you have known him awhile. That explains the fast pace better. Do you think it's a cultural thing more than a personal tendency? Maybe he sees it as feminine to show affection.
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 07:20 PM
1

Well she doesn't have to own the firearm. Many ranges rent them for use at their range only. Plus a man-shaped target is the standard for all shooting classes and training at most ranges, so that's not really a bloodthirsty suggestion. Many ranges also prohibit the use of personalized targets with real people on them
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 07:08 PM
1

Absolutely!
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 06:54 PM
2

You should be proud you made the decisions to stay a virgin. Don't believe the lies of the media, your friends, and older women who've made bad decisions. A good guy will find your innocence refreshing and appealing and will be excited to teach you the intimate arts. Your SMV is higher because of these good choices. I am happy with my first time, who it was with and how long I waited. What I'm not so happy with were the hookups in between meaningful LTRs that I engaged in for the sake of "gettin…
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 03:48 AM
3

I'd agree that this seems very rushed. It's really hard to say what's going on since you yourself probably don't know him very well since you're still in the honeymoon phase. I'd also like to know your age and the countries you're from. Once again, it's hard to give advice without getting a good sense of who he is. You could either bring it up casually (I'd love it if sometimes you'd randomly grab my butt or sweep me up in a kiss) or guide his hand a few times and see if he learns.
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 03:22 AM
6

Depending on who your boyfriend is you'll either both take the secret to your grave or he'll make fun of you months from now when you don't expect it.
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 03:18 AM
1

I would suggest getting involved with Judo, MMA, Kickboxing, Karate etc. There are always classes in one town or another, and some even have them especially geared toward women. Any sport where your aim is to attack/inflict harm/disarm someone will be a great channel. I used to play Roller Derby (full contact sport) and I loved the rush of hitting others and even was driven by being hit and getting back up. It felt like I wouldn't let them get the best of me. I'd also suggest shooting. I like ha…
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 03:13 AM
2

I love borscht and have been wanting to try goulash for a long time.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/16 02:25 AM
1

We did some of what we call campfire chicken stew. It's a recipe modified from an all-canned version that is perfect for camping. It's a stew of chicken, green beans, tomato bisque, mushrooms, and potatoes. We added some carrots for kicks too. It ends up being a wonderfully rich and flavorful stew.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/16 02:25 AM
2

Yes! I love wild game and wild game chili. My family does elk chili.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/16 02:23 AM
1

So glad things worked out! I know how tense and stressful it can be when you need more attention/care than you're getting and you can't communicate it or just aren't getting it period. I have certainly felt very needy when there was a miscommunication in my relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/16 02:20 AM
5

For me it was all the positive attention, especially from my boyfriend, when I started taking more care of my appearance. I was surprised that I could be one of the "pretty girls." The main thing that clicked though was how it affected my confidence, which put me in a better mood and made me nicer. It also really clicked with me just reading theory that said you should be a first mate to your SO, the captain. I always deep down wanted to do this in my relationship, but feminism teaches you that …
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/16 02:39 AM
1

The subreddit is a wealth of knowledge. With my hair I won't rinse out any of the conditioner at the end of the shower and I'll scrunch it with a t shirt to dry it and it's done wonders for my hair. Also your teeth really aren't that bad though. I've seen much worse on people still considered attractive. You shouldn't suppress any smiles IMO.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/16 10:31 PM
1

I have felt that way before. The great thing is, once you start putting in the effort, you see the difference and you start to feel like you are worth it. Forget the nose job and cheek lift. The only structural thing you might consider changing is your teeth. I also second the comment about the blonde. It's not your color and is likely frying your hair.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/16 08:38 PM
1

FYI here are some before&afters for my hair: Before: https://imgur.com/CDFz1pg After: https://imgur.com/a/ZbZdd Obvs different lengths, but a huge difference nonetheless. There was no use of a curling iron or hot rollers in the 2nd image. Just technique and a couple products.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/16 06:30 PM
6

You are WAY too hard on yourself. I'd rate you as pretty attractive, especially for your age, based on that photo. I think going to a subreddit entitled "Am I Ugly" may be the wrong place to go for your purposes. Good for you for losing weight! That will boost your attractiveness at any age. Your teeth aren't that bad, but if you get the chance to improve them, go for it. Go to the curly hair subreddit, ASAP. Read the side bar, post a pic for guidance. I have naturally curly/wavy hair that I had…
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/16 05:57 PM
2

I'm not sure if the Brexit is directly aligned with conservative views in the UK. That's just my outsider assumption.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/16 05:32 PM
2

Wow, that's a shame. Half my family's originally comes from England and we get a lot of our values from older English traditions. But yeah, there are definitely still conservative people here. Then again, the UK did vote for the Brexit, so maybe the conservatives are all in hiding.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/16 05:30 PM
1

This is so spot on. I don't know if you're talking about the U.S., but it's certainly the case here. People are so caught up in letting their child "self determine" that they provide no boundaries or discipline. This just leads to poorly socialized, misbehaving brats who will never develop the self control it takes to fit in or achieve anything (sounds harsh but I've just seen it way too much to sugar coat). People practically want to throw you in jail if you suggest spanking a child. Let me tel…
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/16 07:11 PM
1

Genius!
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/16 03:48 AM
1

Yum! This sounds a lot like what me and my bf do. We often find pork tenderloin on sale and make burritos. With just the two of us and with most recipes making 6 servings we could usually squeeze several meals out of cooking once.
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/16 03:46 AM
2

I certainly believe it's true as I've only been really attracted to guys and men "more" than me. In a past BF he was taller and more outgoing. In my current BF, he's only slightly taller but is much broader and larger, and he has more education and is significantly smarter than me. Does this make me think "I could do better?" For me, I'm happy where I am because I followed my hypergamous instincts in the first place. It only becomes a problem when "branch swinging" comes into play. People often …
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/16 01:47 AM
4

Yay! This is exactly what I need. I just ordered a copy.
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/16 01:19 AM
3

It really is super good! The pumpkin flavor is subtle. I did sub cheddar for monterey jack and it was still delectable. Please excuse this typed out version! It was a magazine cutout recipe. Hands on time: 10 min, Total Time: 1hr10min Ingredients: 2c pumpkin puree 2 10oz cans diced tomatoes with green chilies, divided 1 Tbsp chili powder 2 tsp ground cumin 1 tsp chipotle powder (opt) 1/2 tsp salt 2-3 cups diced cooked chicken 10 corn tortillas, cut in half 2 cups grated Monterey Jack cheese Chop…
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/16 12:41 AM
2

Ooh, that looks delicious!
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/16 06:29 PM
1

Last night I made this pumpkin chicken enchilada casserole that is so good! It sounds weird, but the pumpkin subs for beans and is lighter than beans are. Let me know if you want the recipe. For the recipe, I used leftovers from a roast chicken I made (one of my favorite meals of all time).
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/16 06:28 PM
1

That's pretty much the conclusion I came to. I get so caught up reading RP sometimes that I forget who I'm trying to impress. My man approves so that's all that matters.
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/16 01:07 AM
1

I did alright with my goals. I lost 4lbs (not 5). The feminine walk thing (one foot in front of the other) I kind of gave up on. It felt too awkward and unsustainable. I decided instead to make sure to maintain good posture, slow down, and wear heels more. This month my goals are: 1.Find a job 2.Maintain current exercise routine with the job (workout in some form at least 5 days a week) 3.Stop drinking diet soda I will say I'm very grateful to this sub. Since I've joined my hair looks better, I'…
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/16 07:28 PM
2

Great goals! It sounds like you're taking on a lot at the same time. You may want to choose 2 or 3 goals for this month and choosing others for next month.
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/16 07:02 PM
1

You can always shoot him a text or call saying you have been thinking about him and want to see him soon. Ask about specific plans. He may be busy with other things and it doesn't have to do with you. If his response is lukewarm, negative, or no response I think you can safely say he's just not that into you and saw you as a potential conquest. If he agrees to hang out you can always go the unsexy but practical route of saying you like him and want something more. You've hung out 3 times (and if…
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/16 06:41 PM
2

This is me all the way home. I was going to post that I'm still working on improving my looks and femininity. I find I get a lot more attention now that I'm no longer telling myself that spending time on hair,makeup, and clothing is vain. I'm still not used to the attention though! My BF definitely likes it though.
/r/RedPillWomen01/10/16 01:49 AM
1

Oh, well your height explains it all. Ignore the triggering.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/16 02:13 AM
1

Yes!
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/16 05:18 PM
4

It raises some red flags for me that you 1. Dated his brother and 2. Turned him down twice before asking him out and 3. He said he didn't want to rush things. He probably sees it as multiple rejections from you while you were off living a separate life. While he may have wanted something serious before, he may feel spurned and no longer be interested in a LTR at this point. Like the others say, be the best woman you can and bring up commitment again.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/16 01:39 AM
2

This guy clearly doesn't have your best interest in mind and is not worth your trust. Out of one side of his mouth he says don't use meds or see a therapist, just rely on him and out of the other side of his mouth calls you a spoiled brat and is upset by your emotions? Something doesn't add up there. You said you were doing way better on your meds and suddenly you think it's a good idea to go back to feeling like crap because you should be able to tough your way through it? That makes no sense. …
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 05:34 PM
1

If you have been dieting to lose weight and you've reached your goal weight, you're probably eating fewer calories than your body needs. Most doctors and resources recommend a number of calories that is below what you'd need at your goal weight so you lose weight quickly (1-2lbs/week). Once you get there you should adjust your intake up a bit. The number of calories you need can vary so much depending on your physical makeup, that's why I linked that site. For me to maintain my weight (140lbs at…
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 02:29 PM
2

So true. Sleep deprivation can make you fat.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 02:12 PM
1

Let's be honest, most overweight and obese people probably aren't on a 2000 cal a day diet. Then again women of average height and average activity levels need less than that. Good post though. Losing weight is a very simple and just requires some discipline. Here is a great resource to figuring out how many calories you need to gain, lose, or maintain your weight based on age, sex, height, and weight: http://www.calculator.net/calorie-calculator.html
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/16 07:48 PM
2

Sounds amazing!
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/16 07:27 PM
2

Favorites from our meal plan: Elk stew (could easily be made with beef. We're a hunting family) Chicken pad Thai Turkey tacos Mediterranean eggplant stew (this was a new dish for us full of eggplant, tomatoes, fresh herbs and spices along with feta cheese. Turned out better than anyone expected!)
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/16 07:25 PM
9

I'd definitely recommend learning how to cook some basic things. I don't know what culinary tradition you come from, but some basic things like roasting vegetables, baking chicken, making eggs, and how to make rice or mashed/baked potatoes are good starting points for incorporating real food into your diet. I especially recommend roasting veggies (mix chopped veggies with oil and salt and roast around 425F) because it makes them delicious while providing nutrition. Learning how to cook is a life…
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/16 12:58 AM
23

I've fallen guilty of this, mainly when I had no hobbies and expected my man to entertain me every hour I wasn't at work. Needless to say I drove him nuts. We're both far more sane now that I've learned to butt out and find some business of my own to mind.
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/16 09:28 PM
2

Haha, the beast with two backs! That's so creative and much funnier.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/16 05:34 AM
2

Very good point. I suppose I need to pray on what I really value as feminine in myself.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/16 05:32 AM
1

I love podcasts! They fill the silence while you learn something. Also services like Spotify or Google Play music create playlists by mood or artist, which I love.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/16 11:27 PM
1

I want to lose 5lbs so I'm no longer in between a 6 and an 8! Clothes really look better when they're neither bulging nor bagging. I also want to practice my feminine walk and posture. No more hunchback running into tables and knocking things over!
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/16 11:26 PM
2

So you're saying I'm doomed?
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/16 07:03 PM
1

Oh my gosh, me too! I don't know how to stop that since it's such a big part of my personality. That's part of why I cursed so much--to be funny. I don't know if I should stop, or even if I can stop...I mean, eliminating cursing and potty humor seems doable, but not being funny at all? I don't know. Then again, a lot of it comes off as insecure since I make a lot of jokes at my own expense.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 09:36 PM
1

That's a very good way of putting it actually. There are many versions of femininity, and trying to emulate them all will never work. I think currently I probably come off like a Southern version of Elaine Benes from Seinfeld...
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 04:26 PM
1

I totally agree with your point about reality show stars. That is actually what woke me up to what my behavior was edging toward, and I thought that was disgusting. It's actually been relatively easy to stop cursing once I made a conscious effort.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 04:22 PM
3

Yeah I've noticed too that a lot of my clumsiness comes from rushing. And usually my rushing comes from unwarranted impatience. And impatience can make me unpleasant. So I think I could stand to slow down a bit!
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 03:01 AM
1

Oh my gosh yay! Just what I needed. And I agree, those habits are to be kicked entirely. I'm still struggling a bit with picking little fights.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 02:35 AM
1

Hmm, interesting. I'm always that person doing the dance steps backward. I've wanted to take dance classes anyway though, so that's a good thought.
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/16 09:43 PM
1

I've definitely developed a sense of humor around my clumsiness. What else can you do? No use crying over spilled milk (and its shattered glass bottle that you knocked over). It's good to know clumsiness isn't the end of the world.
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/16 09:42 PM
4

TL;DR: Got here from TRP sidebar, stayed because I liked what I found. My boyfriend and I were growing skeptical of our avowed feminism after graduating from university. We'd both been disgusted and alienated by SJW culture and it's lies, and his studies had led him down the RP path (much to chagrin of his professors). He started showing me articles that got me to see men's rights activists and the manosphere as legitimate. Of course I'd heard of Roosh V and "meninists" from feminist channels, b…
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/16 02:47 AM
3

I think it's fine to "take some time for yourself" to regroup before getting into a relationship, but marrying yourself? Seems sad, unfulfilling and irreverent. If I were a right wing talking head I'd be yelling about how this trend degrades the sanctity of marriage rather than focusing on gay people.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/16 08:01 PM
2

This week on the menu: 1.Spicy chicken tacos with black bean & corn salad on the side 2. Roasted Lamb with mashed potatoes and sauteed green beans, and peach pie (special night) 3. Southern Veggie night: collard greens, purple hull peas, sweet potatoes, and corn muffins (vegetarian) This went over well! Inspired by a trip to the local farmer's market. 4. Spicy Cashew Noodle Salad and Asian cucumber salad on the side (vegan) 5. Green curry salmon with a side of broccoli (this one is experimental)…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/16 02:41 AM
3

No, no...just a bit cuckoo. She's now awaiting the perfect boyfriend. Does this mean she'll have to file divorce papers?
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/16 12:41 AM
4

My sister once told me she was marrying herself. She had a ring and everything. I responded very tactfully--with silence.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/16 07:14 PM
3

Very timely post for me. I recently asked for life advice because I have a bad habit of switching between these two poles and making my situation worse.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/16 07:13 PM
2

As for reasons I've considered leaving: I'm terrified my captain will never be able to man the ship. It's difficult/sometimes impossible for me to stay strong and positive (or at least stoic) when he's falling apart, and my panic makes the situation harder for him. I'm worried that we'll never be able to have kids and build a life together.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/16 05:39 PM
1

His personality, our history, and the (probably naïve) hope he'll get better. Even though he's often gloomy, he still powers through it enough to where he's like his old self sometimes. Of course he says he's nothing of himself since he can't work or do any of the many hobbies he used to participate in.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/16 01:18 PM
2

I'm the one who sparked this conversation, and I have to say even I don't know. I recently physically departed from my SO (we didn't explicitly break up) in an unplanned move because I was coping very poorly mentally. I had become a burden on those around me instead of the help I had been for the past 1.5 years. I've been praying on this question quite a lot. I love him, but he daily expressed that his condition gave him no life and that he feels as if everyone is living their life around him, o…
/r/RedPillWomen29/08/16 10:41 PM
1

Thanks for responding 2x! I love the Rules Revisited and have been using it as a guide. Luckily I don't need to lose weight (when I I'm out of shape I mean jiggly but at a healthy weight). I'll try to break down the other issues in future posts.
/r/RedPillWomen29/08/16 12:10 AM
1

Monotony gets to me the most. I have clocked a couple of years in admin where answering calls all day was my primary duty.
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/16 10:29 PM
3

You're right. I've been by his side for 4 years and should not give up now. The move isn't a permanent one. I recently has a fit of selfish panic after accepting a good opportunity for a master's degree in the area, and I sabotaged it. I was afraid of the additional responsibility, not toward him but in my career. There's a possibility of salvaging this opportunity. I suppose I already know my own answers. The area where we were living is unfortunately extremely economically depressed and gettin…
/r/RedPillWomen27/08/16 02:36 AM
3

Hmm, a staffing agency would probably do me good. If you live in the US, are there any names I should look out for? And you're correct, and my experience is mostly in administration. I'm not very organized by nature which makes the job difficult. Certainly an area I need to improve upon. Also the degree was my decision. At the time I thought I was putting off a decision of what to do with my life, not realizing I was wasting time and resources while doing it. I had academic scholarships that cov…
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/16 08:30 PM
1

I will check that out! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/16 11:29 PM
2

I didn't. Hence my predicament.
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/16 11:19 PM
1

Sounds great. Thank you for all your hard work!
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/16 08:47 PM
2

Thanks for spelling it out for me! That's pretty much what I do. I think my boundaries are sound.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/16 08:42 PM
6

Thanks. I've been much better at firmly maintaining said boundaries since I swallowed TRP. Most of the past mishaps came from me thinking "he just wants to be my friend." Funny thing, I didn't start out that naïve, but for years I'd comment to a BP friend that Nice Guy X was flirting with me, she laughed, said that was ridiculous, and implied I was vain for thinking so. Thank God for the Dark Truth.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/16 08:37 PM
1

I'm unfamiliar with the wiki. Where can I find it?
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/16 12:49 AM
1

Thank you! Could a mod pin this so we can find it later?
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/16 11:12 PM
1

If your gut tells you it's not going anywhere, you're likely right. My guess is you're a teenager if you're using Snapchat so much. You can bring up commitment and specific plans to get to the same place. If he's Blue Pill he may bolt. He doesn't seem to just want you for sex, but the fact is he lives 2 hours away. It sounds like it's time to draw some boundaries, assuming you haven't already slept with him. I seriously advise against a long distance relationship with him. I know that Snapchat a…
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/16 07:36 AM
3

Real life. Happened to me. I had the benefit of never fully swallowing the blue pill because my father and grandfather are very influential parts of my life. But my mother didn't give me any feminine guidance growing up (she did to a degree lead by example, but she herself has conflicted priorities to a degree), so when I was in doubt with my choices, I'd reference media I'd seen. It certainly encouraged me to make some of my worst choices. I beleive that BP media is very damaging to children. P…
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/16 01:00 AM
2

Appeal to his sense of duty. When you bring it up, say that he's affecting the entire family (or he's affecting you if you don't have kids) and likely his co-workers too. Tell him he could be putting his job at risk. Say that there are a lot of easily (and cheaply) solvable and common chemical issues that could be affecting him (see Vit D deficiency) that are not his fault. Tell him he's your rock, but that you are there to support him in return. He is probably afraid of showing weakness, but if…
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/16 11:54 PM
1

I can verify that vitamin D deficiency is a truly serious issue. People often brush it off since it's so common. I had extremely low Vit D levels that hadn't been corrected last summer and fall, and my stomach wasn't functioning, my entire body ached, and I felt so crazy it was like I had temporarily developed schizophrenia. Stress was a factor as well, but after I took serious doses of Vitamin D (coupled with photo therapy for SAD) it was like night and day. I was myself again.
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/16 11:29 PM
1

It has a few times. For the time being we've both decided against it since American law has disincentivized heterosexual marriage so greatly in the past few decades. PM me if you're interested in the details of this decision. We do talk often about having children.
/r/RedPillWomen26/07/16 01:50 AM
1

He explained it to me later that he was mad because I was not acting like I respected myself or like I was valuable. It had nothing to do with fidelity. I had some issues with self esteem and was crushed by the breakup, and I felt like trash and let people use me like I was disposable. It was a negative experience that didn't make anything better. A basic tenet of The Red Pill is that your number of sexual partners has a different connotation if you're a man than if you're a woman due to biologi…
/r/RedPillWomen26/07/16 01:43 AM
1

TRP is a useful strategy for men and women alike in the face of feminism and cultural degradation. But at the end of the day in this system, everyone is left aimless, rootless, and without a legacy. We as western people will be nothing until we take our traditional cultures back.
/r/TheRedPill25/07/16 12:55 AM
4

I'm not trying to defend it nor am I asking anyone to respect it, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't happen. I regret that choice, and part of the reason I wrote this was to warn other young women of the harm feminism tries to convince you to do to your life. I feel lucky that I got a second chance, and I'm doing my best not to screw up again. I didn't ride nearly as long or hard as many women do so I luckily don't have any issues with pair bonding, just some regret.
/r/RedPillWomen24/07/16 06:07 AM
3

Thanks. I am too. We thought he was gonna die a few times there :/
/r/RedPillWomen24/07/16 01:26 AM
1

If he says he needs input, I would do what the other posters said and try to maintain a working knowledge of current event and such so you can at least talk about it. Give him your opinion even if you're not as informed as he is. I know how that goes when you leave school where you devote all your time to ideas and learning, and it seems overwhelming to keep up. Eventually, if you stay brushed up on at least some of the subjects, you'll form basic opinions and be able to go from there with new s…
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/16 10:49 PM
3

Hm, I'd never heard of the Sigma, but my boyfriend is definitely a Sigma with Alpha leanings. What the other posters have said is true. He probably doesn't expect you to "keep up" because he's not trying to compete with you. You are his girlfriend. If he wanted a debate partner he'd go drink and talk with a male friend. The main thing I do is listen. And I mean really listen, follow his train of thought. And I ask questions if I don't understand something, or try to make connections to past conv…
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/16 06:35 AM
1

Thanks for all your replies! I'd forgotten about WHR and waist-height ratio, which are definitely better indicators.
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/16 11:48 PM
2

Yeah he HATES asking for help and detests needing it. I became extra attentive and in tune with his needs because I know if he felt like he had to ask (feeling like he was putting us out) he would just not get what he needed. This alone taught me an important lesson in masculinity and femininity. Since, to be masculine in our culture, men have to be stoic and strong and put their needs last. So when the time comes when your man can't be a rock, a good woman needs to really amp up the nurturing, …
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/16 11:23 PM
1

Thanks for sharing yours. That really hit home for me, that RP is really most important when times are the worst.
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/16 10:38 PM
5

You're totally right that trying times are the true test of a RPW. It can be so easy to lose direction. I discovered RP and RPW during a very difficult time for me and my BF. For over a year, my SO has been extremely ill and has relied on me and his family for just about everything. He is recuperating, but it has been a trying year. That being said, our relationship has grown stronger than ever. Our situation was one of the nails in the coffin of my feminism. Many times I reflected that, were I …
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/16 04:39 AM
1

Haha! Oh my gosh that would be awkward.
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/16 02:54 AM
1

Very true. He likes how I look. I should trust him! He'll give me input on clothes and makeup he likes too, which is nice.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 10:49 PM
1

Haha I suppose that's true. I say athletic because I'm naturally more muscular and don't have classically feminine delicate bone structure. I played sports for years, and all the men & women in my family are more muscular than average. I see what you mean though. I know my boyfriend's opinion and should just take his word on it.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 10:44 PM
1

Very true. I always forget about the waist-hip ratio and get caught up in the idea of skinniness.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 10:30 PM
1

Yeah, it's a pretty unfair way of looking at it. Everyone uses their parents as a template for finding a mate (either what to look for or what NOT to look for), but seeking a 1:1 replacement and making comparisons on every little thing... that's only gonna lead to disappointment.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 10:21 PM
1

Yes! Haha that's what I want to avoid. I'm a little old for the dorm room vibe.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 10:15 PM
1

Thank you so much! I'm not in a living situation I have much control over now, but I've been studying on tips I can bring into my next home! I left the apartment I last lived in unfortunately stark.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 09:52 PM
4

There are no ugly women, just lazy ones (or confused). http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2015/08/ugly-girls-dont-exist.html?m=1 Also you may want to check out this article on how female beauty is highly controllable: http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2011/10/you-can-control-how-attractive-you-are.html?m=1 You're thin, so youre already halfway there. Unless you've got a disfiguring skin condition, you're probably fine. Also, forget the idea that wearing makeup is about covering up your natural feat…
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/16 08:22 AM
2

Seems to me like there are only 2 options here: OP left out critical details that would explain BF's discomfort (e.g. her ex BF is on the team) or He's not captain material. She should forget submission and next him. If the situation truly was as portrayed, he is showing some red flags. A good captain would want his first mate to engage in positive, healthy activities (like a sport) as long as it's not interfering with her responsibilities or a cover for partying. The easy way to solve this prob…
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/16 08:57 PM
13

It's not trivial at all, that's why it's a potentially deal breaking issue. Think about what you've just told us, and what you're telling him: "...no matter how great the man I marry, I could never love him as much as my father." This is the message your boyfriend is receiving. Imagine if he looked deeply into your eyes and said "I love you so much baby, you'll always be my #2. I'll always love you and want to commit to you forever, but I can never marry you. My mom is always gonna be my #1, and…
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/16 09:59 PM
1

Hey! Good luck in your endeavors. It seems like the other posters have given you good advice, but I'd like to leave you with this article since it's made such an impact on me recently. http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2011/10/you-can-control-how-attractive-you-are.html?m=1 I used to be so confused (and therefore self-conscious) at the fact that people would comment from time to time that I look like a model, yet I got very spotty attention from guys. I didn't understand that guys were/would be p…
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/16 06:45 AM
2

I think the term hypergamy is often a little misused here at red pill. You have to remember it's not the same as polygamy/polyandry or branch swinging Hypergamy has much more to with the power dynamic people seek in order to feel well matched or "equal." The part RP belabors is that, contrary to what femenism teaches, in order to feel well matched, the man has to be more than the woman in some way. In the strictest sense, hypergamy is marrying someone in a higher social class. However in practic…
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/16 05:11 PM
2

Also, read this: http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2015/09/older-women-can-still-be-sexy.html?m=0
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/16 06:54 AM
1

Could you give some concrete examples of bringing hyyge into the home--specifically when it comes to decor and room design? I've got the whole cinnamon cookies and tea part down, but I need serious help when it comes to creating a pleasant atmosphere in the home!
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/16 04:56 AM
3

You say you've tried to get him to lead with no success, but you can't berate someone into leading. This isn't the Marine Corps, this is your marriage, and thanks to you and your MIL, your husband is suffering from relationship PTSD. This is why he won't step up, this is why his testosterone is low. He is trying to hide and wait for it all the pass. In order for this to change, you need to make your home a safe environment, a refuge for him. He needs to expect a patient, sweet, understanding wif…
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/16 07:19 PM
2

I know it's not usually recommended here to read classic RP articles, but sometimes it's better to get it straight from the horse's mouth: http://www.returnofkings.com/64661/5-reasons-why-you-should-never-date-a-girl-with-dyed-hair I say this as a woman who, around ages 18-20 experimented with nearly every unnatural hair color in the rainbow. I was pretty much doing it because I thought it looked cool, but I did like the extra attention it got me (at the time I was operating under the incorrect …
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/16 07:34 AM
3

First off, don't ride the cock carousel. It will do nothing for long term happiness and self esteem. Your habit of becoming infatuated with men is something I've noticed in women who have very little experience dating real men. It's something we all go through, but with normal dating tend to get over in middle school and high school. You need some experience (this doesn't mean sleeping around!) with real life men to get over this. As other posters have said, you need to lose the weight. You know…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/16 11:28 PM
1

Haha! It happens.
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/16 10:34 PM
7

They're not mutually exclusive concepts. I have two female best friends who are very important to me. The thing is 1. Not every woman is friend material (especially now that I've left school and the party life, my standards for female friendship have gotten stricter) and 2. My goal is to avoid the crabs in a bucket syndrome. My female friends are women I admire, support, and want to emulate. However, I come into daily contact with many more women who would rather make excuses than changes. I'd l…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/16 06:24 AM
3

That's an important step for you. If you are happy, people who aren't will always try to diminish your happiness. You've just got to take it, like you did, as a twisted compliment and move on.
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/16 02:27 AM
2

Thanks! I like validation too, believe me! However it's always best when unsolicited because it seems more genuine. My boyfriend is very appreciative, which is an important aspect of why our dynamic works. If he never noticed my efforts, I would end up fishing for compliments (and coming up less satisfied).
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/16 02:25 AM
1

I have had the fortune of being able to visit Denmark, and the hygge is alive and certainly something to aim for! It's such a warm, comfortable feeling that is incredibly welcoming.
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/16 08:27 PM
1

The thing is, without observing you in person, it's hard to say whether you're overreacting. However, based on the panic in your posts (vs. defensiveness) I believe you are portraying the situation accurately. The thing about TRP and being a submissive partner is that you have to be emotionally heathy and have boundaries for it to work. Having low self esteem DOES make you act needy, clingy, bitchy etc. Things that can drive away a high value man and therefore make you feel even worse about your…
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/16 07:23 AM
3

Sounds like you are actually a long term plate, not an LTR. What makes you think that if he blows up over tiny things, he will be open to criticism of his communication style? He won't. TRP isn't about men completely dominating women. It's about the give and take within traditional gender roles. Unless somehow you're putting a spin on the situation, it sounds like he doesn't value you. You are letting him chip away at your self esteem, which will make it harder for you to have healthy relationsh…
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/16 07:11 AM
1

Once I mentioned to my boyfriend that if he acted alpha 24/7, I would have assumed he didn't like me and walked away with hurt feelings a long time ago. He then explained that "never breaking frame" is for managing damaged women. 'nough said.
/r/TheRedPill04/07/16 06:42 AM
1

Wow, that's tough. You can do it though! I think I went cold turkey from anything that wasn't fruit for two weeks. Now I allow myself small amounts of treats. I try to use the WHO recommendations for sugar intake when I do (staying below 50g a day, ideally below 25g). It is so worth it though! I don't have energy spikes and crashes or get hangry as often. I also still get to indulge my sweet tooth which is good since I love baking. http://www.who.int/mediacentre/news/releases/2015/sugar-guidelin…
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/16 07:12 PM
1

1st RPW goal! -create skincare regimen to reduce razor burn & occasional breakouts. -create haircare regimen so every day is a good hair day (not 2/7 days a week) -wear a little makeup and jewelry each day, so I always look put together I've already been working on these goals for about a week, and it's been going great! Appearance is an area I struggle with. Not so much weight as the clothes, hair, skin etc. I've started exfoliating 3x a week and using an astringent daily. I've also started wet…
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/16 04:56 PM
1

Great goal! I did this about a year ago (reeaally hard since I was working a mindless office job) and it is so worth it! It is so much easier to listen to my body's hunger cues and not overeat. My advice is to think of it like quitting smoking. Sugar is truly addictive, and should be viewed that way.
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/16 04:46 PM
1

After reading this post the other day, I checked out The Rules Revisited. So helpful! I must have read half the website in a few days. It's helped me redouble my efforts to be the best-looking, most pleasant me. (I have the same problem as OP. Grew up "one of the guys" and have to revisit all the feminine basics).
/r/RedPillWomen24/06/16 04:22 AM
2

There are plenty of real ones out there (though this varies considerably depending on ethnicity individual genetic variation), hence the jealously. However, the idea that having them is the only way to be attractive is a completely silly hang up from when I was younger. Now I try to focus on how I can look and act more attractive with what I've got.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/16 08:58 PM
1

Yep, definitely find "fitspo" posts like that about as helpful as "thinspo" blogs, or any Victoria's secret ad for that matter. Even when I was a serious athlete, I did not look like those women. In fact I'm usually more naturally athletic than them, but no amount of working hard or not caring what others think will get me that set of D cups I always wanted. ;) That said I'm quite fit, I've just have to come to terms with my genes, no thanks to posts like this.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/16 08:40 PM
2

No, but we want them when we become more financially stable. Currently working a few part time jobs before I start grad school. Could be nice but it seems unlikely. Also would be nice, but considering our financial situations and the current marriage laws it's a bad idea. Follow through with grad school (public health) hopefully find a decent job. I'd probably move back closer to my family as well. Early 20s Almost 4 years.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/16 06:39 AM
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