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SupermarketFun21 Archive

View 14 posts and 596 comments by SupermarketFun21 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
356

DiscussionSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 03:13 AM
313

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 12:51 AM
268

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 12:09 AM
173

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:06 AM
159

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 09:47 PM
128

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:03 AM
63

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 05:34 PM
61

DebateSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 01:37 AM
25

Question For WomenSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 02:26 AM
16

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/22 11:52 PM
10

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 01:27 AM
3

DiscussionSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 11:44 PM
3

DiscussionSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 05:02 AM
2

CMVSupermarketFun21/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 12:55 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

For what it's worth, I live in the exurbs near a major city. I've found it incomparably easier to get dates with city women than suburbanite women. Yeah, as a guy, you have more competition in the city, but same goes for the women to a greater degree. Overall, the market seems to be a lot tougher on guys the less urban you go.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 02:34 AM
5

Make a few dating profiles of moderately attractive men, see the response they get, and report back.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 02:24 AM
0

OP's premise is easily demonstrated with some dating app experimentation, but conveniently, the one way we have to quantify dating market conditions is somehow an outlier that doesn't reflect real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 02:15 AM
6

Women especially don't like it when a man is talking to them with an obvious agenda. I never got too into the pickup scene, but one piece of pickup advice I've seen/heard multiple times is, when hitting on a girl who's with a group of friends, chat up the friends first. Makes you look less like an approaching machine and more like a fun, social guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/22 01:36 AM
42

For guys looking to gain confidence to pursue women they’re attracted to, the first piece of advice is usually to talk to women they aren’t attracted to. No expectations, just get comfortable chatting people up. I think this is solid advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/22 06:29 PM
3

Sure, that's easy. None of it creates genuine connections, and getting back to the point of the OP, certainly not romantic connections.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 11:33 PM
2

That's pretty much everyone, and no, having a bunch of essentially scripted interactions does not teach you to relate to people or make real connections.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 11:25 PM
5

And men want a woman who is far more physically attractive than they are. That’s life. Want? Yes. Demand to the point where they'd stay single before they dated their equivalent? Absolutely not. Women actually do opt to stay single en masse rather than date a man who's not far beyond them in status/charisma. For some charisma comes naturally, others have to work at it but it is a skill anyone can learn. Either by growing and maintaining a social circle and including platonic female friends, or j…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 11:01 PM
14

Options: grow and maintain a social circle in order to learn how to be at ease in your own skin Anxiety doesn't work like going to the gym. You don't do X sets of Y reps of socializing and get progressively more comfortable with it. Some people have anxiety that doesn't stem from lack of exposure to the stressor. Stick to OLD and hope you land on another socially anxious person This can work once in a blue moon, but generally, even women who are shy/introverted/anxious won't give a man a chance …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 10:43 PM
31

I take issue with this on two fronts. This is generally enough for people to be receptive to talking to you. But who says women see you as a romantic option just because they're talking to you? Friendliness does not equal romantic consideration. More importantly, your phrasing ("all anyone needs") makes it sound like this demeanor is easy to have and no big deal. That couldn't be further from the truth. To a socially anxious person, this sounds an awful lot like "Happiness and gratitude is all a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 10:25 PM
7

^Bravo. I wish everyone was forced to recite that last paragraph every morning like kids do with the pledge of allegiance. Hypergamy when it comes to looks and money is discussed here ad nauseum, but I'd argue the most common example of that entitlement is women rejecting guys because their initial interactions were a bit strained/awkward. It's usually not a case of the guy being more boring or having worse social skills; many women just see it as solely the man's job to carry the early interact…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 05:06 PM
1

Fair enough. That’s interesting. Not doubting your claim, but I’ve never heard any woman admit that. And in my experience having been on way too many first dates, they never order anything all that big or expensive, and usually take like two sips of their drink per hour… not behavior consistent with actually giving a shit about the free food/drinks. Although like I said before, I may be running with a different demographic.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 06:10 AM
4

Lol, cause paying the bill for a couple drinks and apps indicates someone's resource potential? Any broke ass dude can manage that, and some well-off guys choose not to on principle.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 05:00 AM
8

I generally agree, but then again I (and possibly you) have pretty much exclusively dated women with their shit in order career/education-wise. Maybe lower class women do actually see that free $15 meal as a big win, I don't know. On this sub, you have to get used to the fact that 80% of people are speaking from zero life experience, just regurgitating whatever bullshit they hear from other people who are equally clueless.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 04:52 AM
5

This is real life experience talking.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 12:39 AM
7

Anyone else notice a pattern in which traditions are ‘antiquated’ and which should still be adhered to?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 08:12 AM
11

If you cared, you'd pay for your meal. How is that any less reasonable than what you said?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 07:58 AM
2

Define “attractive to women.” There are billions of women and their opinions will vary.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 02:02 AM
–

This post is all over the place and barely coherent. Who shames attractive women because they’re taken? And dating absolutely 100% is a market with supply and demand.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 08:50 PM
10

Can I take that last paragraph to mean you see your ‘equal’ as a bland skinny-fat office worker? If that’s the case, why haven’t you worked to improve yourself to the fit, hot, interesting woman who would attract the sort of man you want?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 08:22 PM
7

Most likely, they knew each other for a while and just plain hit it off. The girl fell in love with their compatibility and bond they’d formed, rather than his attractiveness. Other possibilities: The guy does have an exceptional charisma that’s not immediately apparent. The girl is the type who’s afraid to be single for 5 seconds. The girl has compatibility standards that like no one meets but that guy (e.g. must be into the same esoteric political movement). This stuff is way more nuanced than…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 08:02 PM
1

You’re going out of your way to straw-man me at this point. Reread for the second instance of the word “most” in my original comment, which you left out of your little summary, and that will answer your last question.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 05:58 PM
-1

Did you miss the word 'most'?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 05:43 AM
0

This same math applies to women with insane standards and time spent single. Most women do not have absurd standards that are way out of line with what they offer. But if you're a single man trying to date single women (particularly late 20's and up), most of the women you interact with in that pursuit will. It can be a very jading experience if you don't have a good circle of female friends, sisters, cousins, etc. to remind you that that isn't the norm.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 05:16 AM
5

A tl;dr summary of that link would be very helpful. I promise nobody is going to read that 1990's monstrosity of a web page.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/22 04:02 AM
2

I’ve never witnessed one of those types who gets laid all the time struggle to secure a relationship if he wants one. Have you?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/22 08:15 AM
1

I don’t think any aspect of human behavior is 100% either/or. My position is that sexual selection more innate than cultural.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/22 08:13 AM
7

This is true, but presenting it as advice, like your last sentence, reads a lot like telling a depressed person to "cheer up and just be happy for what you have." This stuff is not a decision, it's a skill, and an extraordinarily difficult one for those who don't have it come naturally.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 09:46 PM
0

Wealth, beyond what keeps you out of poverty, won't help you looksmax.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 09:44 PM
7

Yep, this issue strikes a nerve with me, because I was one of those confused teenagers/college kids who missed out on a lot by misunderstanding this concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 08:01 PM
4

Are you saying you put off sex with the men you're most attracted to?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:58 PM
0

Agreed that appearance is the other major filter, but what does making bank have to do with first impressions?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:53 PM
1

No, that isn't at all what I said. I think women who say they date autistic, soft men struggle to attract charismatic, masculine men. It sounds like you're a very atypical person with very atypical preferences, and that's totally fine, but it's not evidence against larger human behavior patterns.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:29 PM
12

What in god's name have you been reading? That might be the single most universally agreed upon idea among "manosphere" types.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:21 PM
7

I was on the "humans are animals" train long before I'd ever heard of JP. IMO, humans have one very specific, unique trait - the ability to communicate nuanced ideas with one another, allowing knowledge and wisdom to build on itself and accumulate over generations - that gives the illusion that we're much further from chimps than we actually are.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:13 PM
2

I don't mean this as an insult, it's a legitimate question: Are you able to attract charismatic, masculine men? In other words, are your dating "choices" really choices? And aside from that, nothing you could possibly observe about human behavior applies to all 8 billion individuals on earth. The exception does not invalidate the rule.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:05 PM
7

lol what? That's what you took from this post?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:00 PM
3

The men on here know that's BS though. It sounded like you were attributing that claim to your opposition on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 05:17 PM
2

I thought the current problem was there are more college educated women than men so women were having a hard time finding their match and won't date down? Lol what? Who has claimed this?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 05:11 PM
–

I was just about to make that point about non-attraction based sex, but you beat me to it and nailed the description. Hard agree with the other paragraphs too.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 06:42 AM
–

Have you seen this sentiment anywhere other than FDS?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 08:26 PM
2

I wasn't putting words in your mouth, I was asking a question to clarify your view. Still not sure what your answer is.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 06:30 AM
4

That's a valid point. That trope has always made me laugh too.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 06:28 AM
47

A handful of delusional whack jobs on FDS are not the spokespeople for "women."
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 05:37 AM
2

When you guys talk about how rich men are so attractive, do you mean their wealth actually makes them attractive, or they have the means to obtain completely transactional sex from women who want to be bought nice things?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 05:18 AM
1

You mean women actively try to expand their social network in ways targeted at meeting more eligible men? Or just maintain a normal social life and hey, maybe someone will come along? I'll save you the response, it's the latter, and that is the very definition of not actively looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 05:09 AM
4

I'm fine with that. There are legitimate issues with TRP that keep me an arm's length away, and I appreciate when those are discussed. Still, at least 90% of people criticizing them just repeat utter bullshit that's been passed around like a game of telephone, and have no clue what they're actually talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 05:07 AM
2

There are far more men than women trying to actively date on OLD. And that’s the problem. Too many men today playing a losing game by relying on OLD. Where is it that women actively try to date in similar numbers as men? Sound to me like you’re saying that mens inclination toward polygamy is what’s “hurting” men as a whole. No? One of the things, yes. Bear in mind that only a small percentage of men actually pull this off, and while it's 100% their right, it does come at the expense of other men…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 01:33 AM
3

You’re here debating stuff like this. Are you intellectual?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 12:05 AM
7

You do realize the crux of RP is changing your behavior?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 11:14 PM
2

Anyone should have the right to criticize anything. Are you against free speech? Your whole rant boils down to perceiving some hypocrisy in a man not personally wanting to be involved with sex workers when men create the demand for sex work. Obviously, there is nothing actually hypocritical there.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 10:46 PM
7

I think this is every ideology that creates a space where outside opinions are unwelcome. Without dissenters as a check, extreme nonsense and cringeworthy jargon are allowed to fester, even when the ideology’s fundamental principles are generally true.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 10:19 PM
6

Ah, the old “women’s oversupply of options is actually just as rough as men’s lack of options.”
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 10:12 PM
3

Practically endless. And no, it does not. There are many asymmetries that cause this. There far more men than women actively trying to date. There are individual men with a rotation of women, but not the inverse. Women are orders of magnitude more choosy than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 09:45 PM
3

No, what I pointed out and what you pointed out do not conflict at all. Women select from a practically endless pool of evenly-matched men who want them, while men struggle like hell to land just one evenly-matched woman, and typically hang on when they finally do. Thus, most couples are matched, even though their experience in getting to that point was night and day.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 09:34 PM
3

Yeah no, most men struggle to attract women in their league for any purpose (NSA casual sex or LTR).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 09:01 PM
10

“Most men don’t struggle with getting dates or sex.” Imagine believing this.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 08:21 PM
13

I’ve found that the people you describe generally haven’t bothered to understand the first thing about TRP’s actual claims. They’ve probably only ever read criticism, never any original RP material. Thus, their conception of it is a comically idiotic straw man… usually something about demanding that women spread their legs for shit caliber men, wanting to trick women into fucking them, or expecting the world from women while providing no value in return. Rarely do I see challenges to the specifi…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 08:18 PM
1

I know this from personal experience. Doesn’t matter how lean and put together you are if you can’t form a connection. That’s the hard part.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 05:38 PM
13

Most people are quite capable of being lustworthy just by getting their controllable attributes in order (fitness, grooming, hygiene). For men, this is nowhere near sufficient to attract women, but it is sufficient to keep your girlfriend (if you have one) wanting to bang you. There’s no reason to settle into a passionless dead bedroom relationship other than laziness.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 03:32 AM
1

Women just expect way more in the initial stages. Are you a man? Have you tried attracting women?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 08:35 PM
1

Yes, discard your friends for having just as little social capital as you do, and go find some high-status friend group to mooch value off of. lmao that’ll go well.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 06:04 PM
4

I completely feel you on that. The hardest thing about dating is that failure doesn't come with feedback. Always felt like trying over and over to hit a half-court shot blindfolded: if you could just remove that blindfold for one shot, you could see whether you keep missing short or long or left or right and calibrate accordingly. But you can't. You just keep randomly varying where you aim and hope to get lucky once in a blue moon. Absolutely shitty predicament to be in, but that's life.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 07:13 AM
16

I always found myself wanting honest rejection, to the point where several times, I brought myself to pull the sperg move and politely ask why she wasn't feeling it (no, I never received a useful answer). That being said, I have no clue where you pulled the "large majority of men" claim from. Some men do throw a hissy fit when rejected, and thus it's hard to blame women for always seeking out the least confrontational path.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 07:01 AM
6

lol almost any man can easily support himself. You can't tell me with a straight face that's where they set the bar over on FDS.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 06:55 AM
3

This is the first TRP FDS equivalency I’ve seen that actually holds up.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 06:42 AM
2

I’m talking about what’s typical. I was challenging your assumption that even unattractive (personality or physically) men slut it up when they’re young. The vast majority of them do not because they cannot.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 06:37 AM
1

Are we talking about what’s typical or what’s possible?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 06:27 AM
2

Or mild social anxiety, or regular old shyness, or lack of charisma, or below average looks
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 06:24 AM
8

For this analogy to fit the average PPD woman, the startup founder needs to complain that aspiring sales partners are pretty much all trash, berate this applicant for taking the lazy way out by filling out a bunch of online applications, suggest that he focus his efforts instead on going out and networking, and finally complain about how rude and obnoxious it is when job seekers come up to her and try to network.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 04:40 AM
7

Jesus, chill the fuck out, I'm not even the one who said it. Everyone qualifies the shit out of potential romantic partners; she was just explicit in admitting to it. That's not sociopathy, it's honesty.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 03:09 AM
3

Totally serious, what issue do you take with that statement?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 02:12 AM
3

Okay, in that case, the post title doesn’t reflect your belief. Again, “low fidelity” isn’t at all the same as “utter BS.”
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 09:34 PM
5

Sometimes it’s oversimplified because the person is using shorthand and doesn’t want to constantly make qualifying statements about how it’s actually more complex and contextual than that. Sometimes it’s oversimplified because the person actually thinks it’s that simple and absolute. Regardless, it doesn’t invalidate the concept of social dominance hierarchies.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 09:02 PM
6

/thread
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 08:56 PM
2

Contextual and complex and more dependent on mental than physical traits does not equal “utter BS.”
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 08:43 PM
18

“Men suck everywhere” “Stop complaining” Do you for real not see the irony?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 07:13 PM
1

Chadhood? Lol I don’t love the terminology, but I’m pretty sure when people say Chad, they’re picturing a guy with great genetics on top of being looksmaxed. That said, even if your genes are nothing special, improving your looks is gonna have a way bigger impact on your dating success than earning some money.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 05:37 PM
8

The hot broke guy will do better by light years. It’s 2022, not 1950. Women no longer need a resource provider; they (like men) want someone who fulfills their primal desires.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 04:15 PM
15

Men have a much stronger need for physical intimacy. Delving well into 'speculation I cannot prove' territory, I think women never evolved this level of desire because they didn't have to. In the brutal world that comprised 99% of our species' existence, women reproduced either by being raped or by giving themselves sexually to men who would protect and provide for them. Men, on the other hand, only reproduced if they were seriously driven to do so. In wealthy modern societies, men's immutable s…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 04:13 AM
8

Maybe this is just a general internet thing well beyond this sub, but why do so many people with absolutely nothing of value to add to the discussion feel the need to throw in their worthless two cents? Under any given post, most of the comments obviously made zero effort to understand and address the main point of the post. The actual insightful commentary drowns in a sea of low-effort cliches and strawman arguments. If you don’t want to take the time, or don’t have the knowledge to add anythin…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 08:20 PM
1

Oh I absolutely do argue that, for women who say dating is hard for them. No reason, though, to think the typical woman who quickly lands a guy when she tries to is overrating herself.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 05:53 PM
6

There are way more single and actively looking young men than single and actively looking young women. That fact alone guarantees women can easily land equivalent counterparts, while men have immense difficulty doing so. There is no symmetry.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 05:43 PM
6

Males do not think they’re too good for their equivalent female counterparts. That phenomenon is a one way street. Ratios ratios ratios.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 05:27 PM
21

Women aren’t attracted to a man unless he has social acumen. The whole drawn out, indirect mating dance is the process of the man demonstrating his social abilities to the woman’s liking. Trying to bypass that is trying to deny women one of their main vetting mechanisms. Naturally, they’re going to hate that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 04:16 PM
4

You’re nailing it throughout this thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 02:12 PM
11

lol, it’s beyond me how this distinction isn’t obvious to OP and everyone commenting no. With a woman who chooses you, the experience is much better, and she’s likely to be a repeat customer if not an LTR. Night and day from getting a prostitute.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 01:59 PM
10

I’d add that his two factors aren’t even the most important determinants of SMV/RMV. This sub overrates salary to a ludicrous degree. Nobody actually gives a shit how much you make.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 07:52 AM
1

Did you miss that last part of my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/22 06:36 PM
1

Because they don’t actually know who in their pool of options is marriage minded, so they’re not justified in claiming there’s no one worth dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/22 06:35 PM
1

In that case, women have some minority of good men to choose from, which is not a struggle (at least anywhere near the level of being a man with zero options).
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/22 06:33 PM
2

lol, just assume all men who pursue women are trash, and voila, both sides have their struggles. Anyone want to dig up that post of the guy who did a fake female Hinge profile, and reported being pursued by tons of good-looking professional men (lots of doctors IIRC) being respectful and witty?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/22 06:01 PM
-1

You’re claiming that multiple times, you’ve been on the verge of fucking a woman, only to have her pull back upon seeing your dick?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/22 04:52 AM
1

lol, it does, it’s a very common and mainstream way people meet now. But this is true offline as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 09:10 PM
1

Yeah no, I’ve pointed out multiple times, men who struggle are striking out lonnng before any of that stuff could be apparent. If you want to explain what holds men back, you need to cite traits that are apparent after a brief, superficial interaction, because that’s almost always where the failure occurs.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 09:04 PM
1

What are the most prevalent problems that make a lot of men unappealing?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 08:43 PM
1

Yeah, so I never hear the 'fat sloppy deadbeats' narrative coming from young, half-decent looking women IRL. It's more of a media and internet thing, I suspect emanating from bitter hags who never receive attention from successful men. You see it in mainstream articles about the "lack of marriageable men." You see it when people here dismissively say to struggling men "go outside, hit the gym, stop fapping to porn all day and get a job," which of course assumes a single and struggling man must b…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 08:01 PM
2

I'm upset because bullshit narratives (that I know are bullshit from the times I've been single) like the one I address in the OP are ubiquitous.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 07:24 PM
1

Who said I'm broken? I'm in a relationship now. I gave you evidence that men are frequently rejected even when, for all the woman knows, he could be an amazing catch. What more do you want?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 07:07 PM
0

It's no longer easier to live life and handle bills with a partner than just being single and independent. Was it ever for men?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:55 PM
1

Well there's my own OLD experience. In OLD, the info known about you is very limited, and everything that could be known about me was good: tall, muscular, good job, articulate, photos rated as very attractive on photofeeler. I never said anything remotely misogynistic or disrespectful, but the whole process was still extraordinarily difficult, and I had next to no value on that market. This brings me to the larger point you miss; men who struggle are disqualified before their true colors are re…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:51 PM
0

No and no, instead of asking what I mean, try reading and comprehending the post.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:41 PM
3

I'm not addressing the complaints of forever girlfriends, I'm addressing the complaints of single women who claim there are no men worth dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:40 PM
1

You must be new here...
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:39 PM
2

Every good, respectful and nice guy i know is super liked by everyone, including girls, even if he doesn't earn much or has other negative qualities. "Super liked" as in they don't mind his presence, but so what, the topic at hand is dating. lso what I've noticed happens is that men who are unsuccessful in dating start pretending like that's somehow women's fault, even though they just have nothing to offer, and they develop some nasty habits like pornography and misogyny. Herrrrrre we go. And y…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:33 PM
1

Sounds like your attitude is such that nothing could possibly convince you a man who has a lot to offer is struggling. If a man comes along and says he's a fit, handsome, social guy with a good career and still has a lot of difficulty, you'll just make up some story in your head about how he must be repelling women with misogyny or whatever. What evidence actually would convince you that dating can still be extremely difficult for men that have a lot to offer?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:28 PM
3

Who is doing this and where? Can you provide a quote?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:15 PM
1

This is so ridiculously on-point; I've had IRL conversations about that exact phenomenon. These are jobs that don't command a huge salary, but (except military) their benefit to society very direct and concentrated onto a small number of individuals, making it easier to see. So they develop this complex where they're courageously "helping people," while others are just pressing some buttons on a mouse and keyboard to collect a paycheck.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:01 PM
3

Because they're telling me what I need to do to achieve better results (in a completely useless and non-actionable way, btw - "just improve wherever you're lacking," lmao), when I do not currently need or want results. There's nothing about that worth addressing. As to your point about college degrees, if a psych major earning $35K/yr wants to categorically reject all blue-collar men, that's her choice, but she has no grounds to bitch that there are no decent men on the market, which is the whol…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 07:03 AM
4

What are you exasperated at?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:53 AM
7

You have issues. Your words drip with resentment.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:44 AM
1

Nothing about this was an advice request. I'm not even currently single. I was merely pointing out that women do not act out their claim that fit, well put together, successful single men are so hard to come by.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:42 AM
8

Men who face a lot of rejection are usually rejected long before the woman could ever know if he's an asshole manchild misogynist or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:35 AM
6

Damn, I have tons of respect for the nursing profession, but when doing OLD, I could not help but notice how nurses in particular always, without exception, gave off the most painfully boring, unoriginal, basic vibes. It was literally impossible to engage even a single one of them in actual, two-sided conversation. I don't know what it is about nurses specifically.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:21 AM
5

What got me about that one isn't even just the claim, but how unprovoked/out of place it is. PHT, you honestly need help. The hurt and anger and resentment in your words is palpable.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 06:13 AM
2

Pay attention to the usernames. There aren't a lot of men being cringey, there are a couple of men making a lot of cringey comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:55 AM
3

I think he's saying you're not treated as a scarcity because women don't actually value you having your shit together.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:47 AM
13

Still though, it goes against every grain of conventional wisdom that being utterly broke and moving back in with your parents isn't a death sentence when it comes to dating. Not that I'm surprised; I'm coming to terms with the notion that being the confident guy who can naturally strike up a convo at a bar, and having a good face, are each way more valued by women than money and career success.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:43 AM
23

This helps confirm a suspicion that women vastly overstate their preference for men who have their shit together.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:30 AM
7

If height is 95% of the equation, then every ugly and awkward as fuck 6'7" guy is swimming in pussy, while a 5'6" guy who's ripped, has near-perfect facial features, oozes confidence and witty humor from every pore, and effortlessly vibes with women will most likely die an involuntary virgin. This is what you observe in real life?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:28 AM
6

How are you meeting these women?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:19 AM
7

There is literally no way actual life experience informs this claim.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:18 AM
7

Jesus dude, are you kidding with this?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:14 AM
14

I think it means adapting well to different social situations, reading social cues, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:11 AM
6

Thanks, this makes a lot more sense as a rebuttal to the OP. I think you're misconstruing one key nuance. I didn't say having your shit together doesn't get women fighting over you, I said it doesn't even get women to take you seriously or take any modicum of interest in you. I mean, I've encountered rare exceptions through a ton of grinding, but in general, having all the attributes women say are so rare and valuable doesn't even get them excited to delve into my personality and find out if I'm…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 05:09 AM
3

And this pertains to the OP how?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 04:16 AM
45

This is a refreshing degree of self-awareness. Any sentence pertaining to dating that begins with "I just want..." is always bullshit, and it's nice to hear you came to realize that.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 03:25 AM
13

I have no idea how you think banal advice is a fitting response to this post.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 03:19 AM
13

I hate the whole taking your partner for granted and getting fat thing as much as anyone, but c'mon, you know that isn't particular to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 03:14 AM
9

I don't disagree with this, but it's pretty much a response to a strawman version of my OP. The main point is that women shouldn't claim their dating pool is nothing but shit when there are clearly plenty of decent men out there... maybe men they don't vibe with, maybe men who reject them, but whatever it is, they should just say that instead of spreading bigoted rationalizations. As to the sentence you seem to be addressing, I wasn't just pointing out that money alone won't get a guy pussy. Tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 02:50 AM
12

Yes, all true. I still have utterly no clue how any of this pertains to the point of my OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 02:34 AM
14

It's weird how people jump to these assumptions about my personal life. I'm in a relationship. Despite that, there were times when I was single, and from those experiences, I know bullshit claims about dating when I see them, and I call them out. Doesn't mean I've had no success.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 02:04 AM
21

though lack of money is a straight-up red flag to begin with and a sign of abusiveness lmao I'm just gonna leave that one alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 01:58 AM
18

lol that's your idea of "expecting 'being a functional adult' to make women horny?" It's literally acknowledgment that I don't expect that. By the way, I do, in fact, get a boner over young women who are fit, well put together, and highly functional. So it isn't unreasonable to wish that were enough for men to get taken seriously by women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 01:51 AM
4

I pretty much agree with this. What do you think men and women can do to facilitate a better dating scene that allows for more meeting good people and forming bonds with them?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 01:47 AM
12

Not all abusers are sloppy, inept deadbeats from the getgo. Many are charming, intelligent, successful, handsome men who use these things to lure women into abusive relationships. I don't dispute this, but also don't see how it refutes the point. More and more young men aren't graduating university, and, since a bachelor's degree is now what a high school diploma was 30 years ago, these men don't have good jobs. Nonsense. There are respectable, decent earning jobs that don't require a degree. Li…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 01:38 AM
25

I'm not. Why in god's name didn't you read the post and understand its point before writing a worthless strawman take?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 01:34 AM
18

This 2016 data from the US puts single men slightly ahead in the younger age groups: https://www.marketwatch.com/story/married-men-earn-more-than-single-or-married-women-and-single-men-2018-09-19 Either way it's splitting hairs. The numbers are very close, and don't in any way justify the claim that men with decent careers are in short supply.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 01:33 AM
7

Truth, and I think this actually causes unattractive guys to severely underestimate how fucked the dating market is. They think if you're good-looking, you hit an app and have women throwing themselves at you. In reality, you just win the opportunity to try and entertain women in a bunch of very one-sided conversations.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/22 02:21 AM
1

Stop it with this ridiculous stereotype. Did you follow the link and look at the dude's profile who was struggling? It's very much not what you're describing.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/22 01:20 AM
1

OP specified you have a face with more masculine features and are your looksmatch.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 10:41 PM
4

Me. It’s not worth nearly as much as you think. Mildly attractive women still have a blasé attitude toward men like me, and expect to be entertained or else they’re gone in an instant.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 10:28 PM
12

Matches mean jack shit. If the ensuing convos are boring or strained (as is typically the case), they lead nowhere. I tend to agree with OP, but on a more generalized scale (ie not just OLD); entertaining women is more or less a prerequisite for attracting them, at least in the modern west.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 09:01 PM
1

I was answering your 2nd question.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 08:20 AM
2

Women (or at least the ones I go after) don't go around fucking any guy they find physically attractive. Even if I have sex with a girl fairly early on, like 2nd date or whatever, that's enough for me to be confident she digs my personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 08:10 AM
1

Also usually fat. I just don't know very many guys that are with a fit girl.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 08:04 AM
1

That was exactly my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 08:02 AM
1

but how do you know if she likes your aspects or if she is just desperate for love, commitment and a relationship from you? I'm not sure I follow. If she's desperate for love from me in particular, then she really likes me. If she's desperate for love from anyone, then she's probably hideous and I would never pursue her to begin with. She could be using sex to manipulate you. If you start out quickly on a high note you have no way of confirming if and when she likes you a deep level. What more c…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 03:53 AM
1

Yes. I want her to like both my superficial aspects and the combination of factors that makes me unique. It’s not an either/or.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 03:30 AM
1

No, I think it’s untrue, and that you’re using a ridiculously wide definition of ‘manipulative.’
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 10:39 PM
0

Chinese parents abort baby girls, therefore western parents coddle boys… lmao can’t argue with airtight logic like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 10:26 PM
1

You could’ve saved yourself this rant if you’d actually read what you were replying to. Didn’t say anything about abusers, and didn’t say desirable women only attract good men; just that they attract enough good men to not be convinced that the dating pool consists only of fat, porn-addicted losers as FDS members seem to believe.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 09:58 PM
1

Eh, it seems like the only men they ever get involved with are lazy deadbeats. They diagnose that as nearly all men being lazy deadbeats, but that’s absolute horse shit. Desirable women never express that sentiment, because they attract successful men. FDSers’ main problem is only being able to attract the bottom of the barrel.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 07:19 PM
6

If you struggle to attract the people you want to attract, then by definition, you need self-improvement.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 06:15 PM
8

I have nothing but respect for what’s discussed on FLS, but I think it’s telling that FDS is more active by an order of magnitude. The vast majority of FDSers have no interest in improving themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 05:45 PM
23

I’ve never seen a peep on FDS about increasing their SMV. I have no idea what sub you’re reading. They do both shit talk the opposite gender, but on RP that’s a side dish, whereas on FDS it’s the main course.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 04:31 PM
144

This false equivalence comes up constantly, and it’s ridiculous. I disagree with a lot of stuff on TRP, but its focus is on becoming the person that high-value partners choose, which is respectable. FDS, despite its name, contains zero strategy for pinning down a high-value man. The only strategy discussed there is strategy to avoid unworthy men (pretty much all men in their view), and that takes a clear back seat to rants about how men are shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:54 PM
11

lmao yeah, giving minimalistic replies and not asking questions (the exact behaviors I complain about people doing to me) is definitely the way.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 06:17 AM
11

Showed interest in them by asking questions pertaining to their bio or photos. Overshared in my replies to allow for more potential conversational threads. Had a unique, thought-out bio. Had good photos showing that I'm a very fit, well-kept guy who gets out and goes to cool places. Listed a six-figure job.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 06:01 AM
16

No, I dismissed women for being extremely passive and not taking initiative to show me that further pursuing them was worthwhile.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 04:44 AM
7

His point is that "attracting the wrong type of man" is probably her rationalization when she's actually choosing the wrong type of man.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 04:21 AM
2

I know a ton of fit guys in relationships with fat girls, and very few of the inverse. What you're saying sounds like another NYC-specific thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:50 AM
4

NYC I’m built tho 💪🏼 And we have our explanation! NYC is... different.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:48 AM
1

Are you really popular and charismatic? What country are you in?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:42 AM
7

Yep, that's the experience in a nutshell, for those of us "lucky" enough to even get matches. Always felt to me like they converse with a fuckton of guys at once to keep their options open, and just don't have the energy/motivation to put effort into that many convos. Stupid, counterproductive approach, for the exact reason laid out in No_Tomorrow's original comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:38 AM
12

Nah, this can apply to dating apps too. In my time on dating apps, I stopped pursuing countless women because even though they were responding, they just didn't seem interested or enthusiastic enough for me to bother.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:31 AM
32

Insightful comment. This should be mandatory reading for women who want a guy but refuse to take any initiative.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:24 AM
1

I literally have not said a single thing pertaining to me. This is absurd.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:18 AM
3

It could be true for a woman with a really low-class, whoreish vibe. Successful, conscientious type men may or may not be willing to fuck someone like that, but they're definitely not wifing her up.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:17 AM
3

Yes, that was a godawful assertion. Your logic doesn't follow. "Nobody would be complaining if X was true" does not imply "Everyone is complaining because X isn't true." Huh? How does my comment about FDS have anything to do with having women I talk to in my life? You are either a troll or a walking non-sequitur.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:09 AM
3

If all guys could fuck whoever they want, this subreddit (and many others) wouldn’t exist. This still is not a defense of your assertion that guys expect to fuck whoever they want. It just doesn't logically follow, at all. Women, even ones who were directly hurt by men in the form of abusive relationships or assault, don’t go around complaining about the opposite sex as much as men do. I see you're unfamiliar with FDS...
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 03:01 AM
2

I do not do that and agree it's a stupid approach... but c'mon, women have no way of even knowing who's doing that. And you still haven't defended your assertion that guys are just upset cause they expect to be able to fuck anyone they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 02:51 AM
1

Non-sequitur much?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 02:27 AM
3

No, I’m proposing that red pill is mostly correct, and observations to the contrary are generally true, but don’t invalidate with RP is saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 02:25 AM
1

lol, guys swiping right on everyone and getting no play are just upset they can’t consistently have sex with anyone they want?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 02:22 AM
1

Dude, no one hits on random girls at college. It's all about social circles at that age.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 03:37 AM
3

Can't speak for all men, but I personally have no preference when it comes to those things, with one caveat- for young (pre-gray) women, natural hair color always looks better than dyed.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 03:11 AM
1

Low body fat (~20%), long hair, feminine overall presentation. That's pretty much it, as far as what you have control over. Beauty industry crap like hairstyles, makeup, and nail polish are overdone more often than they help. I'm not totally anti-makeup, but effective makeup should just make you look less blemishy. It shouldn't even be obvious you're wearing makeup. The clown shit you call the "glam look" is repulsive.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 02:49 AM
2

Your original comment was addressing guys who "bitch and moan about how terrible dating is." The men you're describing just now are NOT that. They're the ones getting what they want. They're the winners in all this. And that illustrates my point perfectly; winning with women is not about being a good person. The "bitching and moaning" men you were preaching to struggle to meet women and build initial attraction. Obviously, their issues have nothing to do with moral virtue, because women don't bo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 08:39 PM
2

Okay then let me rephrase: The complaints on here are never "help, I always get dumped by the women I get involved with" and always "help, how do I meet women and get them to want to fuck me?"
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 08:32 PM
8

Introverted, non-beautiful women have zero difficulty finding someone using online dating. The problem with OLD isn't that beautiful people commandeered it, it's that men are way more likely to use it and way more active/aggressive with it when they do.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 08:29 PM
8

Dating really isn’t that bad, the majority of people are in relationships You during the Great Depression: "The economy really isn't that bad, the majority of people have jobs."
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 07:58 PM
9

I've never heard of a man who routinely gets sex and relationships, then gets dumped when they find out he's a shitty person. Men struggle to get things off the ground, i.e, to make a woman even want to bother to know him and see if he's a good guy. That's where all the challenge lies.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 07:52 PM
10

Is a lot of it about attitude and personality? Yes. Is it about being a good, morally virtuous person? No. Don't mix the two up. The social skills required to be good with women are just that, skills. They're no more related to being what we think of as a "good person" than any other skill.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 06:54 PM
3

If this describes the men that come into your life, that says more about you than anything else. There is no shortage of men who bring plenty of value to the table. But it may feel that way to you if you only attract the bottom of the barrel.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 05:22 PM
2

Do you have reason to believe what I said isn't true?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 07:12 AM
3

With the exception of a nice face, that's pretty much a list of all of the overrated qualities that don't matter as much as people think. All of it is worth shit if you lack the social prowess to connect with women and make them laugh in a breezy, relaxed manner.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 04:24 AM
47

I kind of see where you're coming from, in that reading dating advice always made me feel like you need to be a thoroughly flawless, jacked Adonis who always has the right witty quip in order to stand a chance at attracting women. It led to me experiencing a very unhealthy amount of anxiety and sense of inadequacy, but only because there's actually a grain of truth to it. Women are, in the initial stages, ridiculously unforgiving and hard to impress. But "hate?" Nah, not at all. It was always ap…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/22 04:16 AM
1

100% yes. I without a doubt fit all of those categories (except maybe emotional intelligence) and was a heavy dating app user. I know that I'm not an outlier because, despite the fact that I routinely got matches and dates out of it, I always felt a strong vibe that I was selling ice to Eskimos. That is, the women I interacted with consistently behaved exactly as you'd expect them to if they had a huge surplus of men like me to choose from: low conversational effort, blasé attitude, forgetting b…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/22 10:48 PM
1

Wow. Is this a case where you knew him organically and really grew to just like him as a person, regardless of his body type? Or is that the body type you had always preferred?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/22 09:43 PM
1

The term "incel" is ambiguous. Technically, it's an abbreviation for "involuntary celibate," which I'm pretty sure most guys have been at some stretch of their life. But people associate it with members of a rather unlikable online fringe community going by the same name. That's where the confusion may lie; people vilifying incels are referring to the community, whereas you may just be thinking of merely what the abbreviation stands for.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/22 06:42 PM
16

Average skinny-fat dude who "doesn't want to look like a juicehead" = average chubby girl who "doesn't want to look anorexic" It's possible to go too far with fitness, but 95% of people are nowhere remotely near that point, and stand to benefit both their attractiveness and health by hitting the gym harder (or at all). Guys who don't lift yammering about how women don't like huge muscles are simply making a pathetic attempt to justify laziness.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/22 06:34 PM
1

I anticipate some "women aren't interested because men suck so much" type comments, but this is ridiculous. In aggregate, men are more professionally successful than women, spend more time at the gym, and put more effort into their game and social skills. I've literally never heard of a woman who has trouble attracting suitors that are at least comparable in terms of career, looks, and social adeptness. \<sup>This</sup> is the portion of the OP that anticipates and addresses your comment. Do you…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/22 02:14 AM
31

Supply and demand. If 2% of men have the roided out look and 10% of women dig that, then guess what, those dudes are gonna crush. Doesn’t require anyone to be lying about what they prefer.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/22 08:36 PM
1

Once in the span of like a month, I was rejected by one girl for not being feminist, and another girl for not being MAGA. I've had one LTR with a fairly liberal girl, who had that whole feminist where feminism suits her interests and traditional where that suits her interests thing going on. That was grating after a while. The rest of the girls I've dated have been either moderate or apolitical, which is totally fine. Basically, the current partisan zeitgeist is absolute poison. I'm only interes…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/22 03:15 AM
–

Most of this is addressed in the OP, if you'd bother to read it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 06:46 AM
1

I've seen the claim that many men don't put in effort, but not that they (women) themselves struggle to attract decent looking men.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 06:13 AM
1

Sorry for the lack of clarity. I meant I never heard a woman claim that she has trouble attracting suitors that are at least comparable in terms of career, looks, and social adeptness. Is this what you thought I was saying?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 06:08 AM
–

I've never heard a woman make that claim in my OP even in her own estimation.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 05:56 AM
3

https://cdn.statcdn.com/Infographic/images/teaser/20822.jpeg
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 05:50 AM
6

I've also done the fake female profile thing. The creepy messages and dick pic thing is wayyyyy overblown. Most messages from men are boring and/or nauseatingly supplicating, but not creepy. I really don't see what's so difficult about weeding through some lousy prospects to find the good ones who will pretty much do all the work from there.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 05:45 AM
–

Women who give it up frequently and super easily to out-of-their-league bad boys that probably aren't interested in a relationship. For the record, I don't think this behavior should be shamed, unless said woman complains that 'men only want one thing,' in which case, yeah, she needs someone to help get her head out of her ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 05:37 AM
7

I used to do searches on OKCupid, where I'd keep all the other parameters the same (age, radius, etc.) and count up the male users and female users. It was always more than 3:1. Did similar on POF when it was relevant, and it was significantly worse. This only counts the younger (<30) crowd, so that may be where it differs from official stats. The ratios are insane and they're everything when it comes to the users' experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 05:29 AM
1

Lol you thought this the consistently uneven ratios in places you'd likely meet someone was referring to things like biking, crossfit, and sci-fi meetups? It's not. Go back and re-read my OP. Some men put effort into the online dating game that you wouldn't even dream of. Almost no women do anything more than passively swipe (and even the ratio of all swipers is massively skewed).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 05:15 AM
–

It's too obvious and observable to anyone to require a scientific study. Dating apps are more than 2:1 male, and more than 3:1 in the younger demo. Make a fake profile of an average looking woman and an average looking man and watch the difference in response. It's orders of magnitude. Go to a young/hip bar on a Saturday night and just look around. This isn't rocket science and doesn't need to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:56 AM
–

Who's "y'all?" I don't shame or dehumanize anyone. Those that do slut shame are not targeting women who merely "seek out sexual relationships."
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:42 AM
2

It's just one step further down the rabbit hole. If I kept asking "why" and digging deeper, the post would turn into a book, whereas I just wanted to make one concise point. I don't disagree with that last statement.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:33 AM
3

That's just demonstrably false. In my OP, I talked about the consistently uneven ratios in places you'd likely meet someone. There's also the fact that male dating forums are always focused on self-improvement and being appealing to women. The only female dating forum I'm aware of (FDS) is all about making demands.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:30 AM
–

These cherry-picked examples mean nothing when it comes to population level trends.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:27 AM
2

Women used to have a sense of urgency to be married young. They do not anymore. What's always been true is them having less interest in casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:25 AM
–

They’re uninterested in the selection of available men This is addressed in my OP: I anticipate some "women aren't interested because men suck so much" type comments, but this is ridiculous. In aggregate, men are more professionally successful than women, spend more time at the gym, and put more effort into their game and social skills. I've literally never heard of a woman who has trouble attracting suitors that are at least comparable in terms of career, looks, and social adeptness. Do you dis…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:24 AM
–

If you think rejection is "dangerous," lol what are you afraid is going to happen?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:19 AM
2

Then you need to alter your worldview. It's difficult for men even if you're well paid (and fit and intelligent).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:18 AM
3

I am "getting" that and that's my whole point from the beginning.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:07 AM
–

Well, my whole argument is that one side is very overrepresented in terms of making the first move and putting in the work. Do you not agree?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:04 AM
2

Yes. And that's an interesting question to ponder, but probably merits a whole other post.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:01 AM
5

A majority of couples meet either online or in a bar. This isn't some fringe thing. It's what normal people do.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 04:00 AM
–

Why does it make any difference to you what *most* guys look like? Can you not still attract some that are fit and decently dressed?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:56 AM
–

Yeah so I think that defeats your original point. It sounds like the party ratios are that way because that's how the frat wants them to be, not because that's the ratio of who's interested in coming.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:54 AM
–

That statistic doesn't prove my point wrong. All it proves is that among men, the limited supply of sex is concentrated into fewer people. The supply is still limited by women. Your reasons are easily disproven. If male unemployment and living with parents were drivers, then gainfully employed men with their own place would have high SMV. They do not remotely. The technology point is addressed in my OP: More men pausing their video games and showing up to these things would not, in the aggregate…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:51 AM
1

Yes, thanks for clarifying.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:44 AM
–

This post has nothing to do with me, but yes, I am, and I'm in a relationship, but the dating journey has taught me things.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:43 AM
4

It's passively looking, not actively looking. Bars and dating apps and Meetup groups are full of human beings just like everyone else. This narrative that only drunk ass degenerates are at bars, and only losers are on dating apps, is fucking absurd.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:42 AM
–

Lol what bars do you go to? I've never seen a non-male dominated ratio, let alone that. Also you can't just brush aside OLD. That's a massive piece of the dating market and was even pre-pandemic. I'm not so much saying women have sworn off dating. More like, they don't prioritize it enough to actively look.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:38 AM
–

Hoping to meet someone through friends isn't "actively looking." My point stands that there are far more men actively looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:35 AM
–

That's not useful. I addressed this point in my OP too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:32 AM
–

Of course there are some, but in aggregate, there are way more young men than young women actively looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:32 AM
–

Are these frat parties that deliberately invite more women, have ratio requirements for men to be admitted, etc?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:31 AM
–

Then why is this the case? Or do you think it isn't? Anywhere you might go to meet people, whether dating apps, bars, Meetups, or singles events, is typically going to be a sausage fest.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:27 AM
–

What makes the men she attracts not quality?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/22 03:24 AM
10

Among people in actual relationships, there’s no huge difference. I know of more fit man/fat woman couples than vice versa, but it goes both ways. Among single people, there is a huge difference. All chronically single and looking women are trying to punch comically above their weight, while the inverse isn’t the case at all. Can’t really be any other way given the ratios.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/22 11:44 PM
18

Agreed in terms of initiating contact. However, some men seem to misinterpret this concept as needing to keep plugging away at a woman they're interested in, regardless of how much she gives back. In my experience, a woman who doesn't show enthusiastic interest pretty early on is a waste of time to pursue. I've never gotten anything worthwhile out of chasing a woman who's being lukewarm, and believe me I've tried. Initiate a lot of interactions, but only spend real energy on those who take an ob…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 07:20 AM
3

Even if you do see it as a transactional game to win, self-improvement is still the most sensible strategy. This anti-improvement sentiment people have around here is mind-boggling nonsense that no one ever applies to any other area of life.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 04:21 AM
2

Totally agreed. But then the better course of action is to do what you need to do to attract the women you'd really want. Not, as you said, "just accept that you won't have female companionship." That's a recipe for misery. It's also worth pointing out the ways you'd improve to try and attract more women are also useful in other aspects of life. Who doesn't want to be more fit, well put together, and socially adept? Why would anyone discourage any of that?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 03:45 AM
5

Why are you assuming that men only want a girlfriend for social validation? Do you not think there's a strong, immutable, innate desire for a lot of men?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 03:35 AM
2

Fair. I'd dispute losing weight then though. I've always been naturally lean, but losing weight is not at all easy for some people. Of course building muscle gives diminishing returns, but why not get as close as you reasonably can to the optimal level? Most importantly, I disagree with the premise that self-improvement isn't worthwhile because it's hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 03:04 AM
14

Lowering standards is low effort and high reward. Dating women you don't find attractive is "high reward"? Are you joking? There aren't many things men can easily improve on anyway outside of losing weight, grooming themselves, and dressing better. Wrong. Men can also build muscle, improve their social skills, and improve their approach to meeting women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 02:58 AM
5

No, there’s absolutely no reason to, and no, I don’t assume something must be wrong with her. OLD is a way to increase your probability of finding someone who’s a great match. There’s nothing sketchy or shameful about partaking in it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 08:55 PM
9

“I don’t understand this, so I’m just going to posture as being too cool for it.”
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 05:33 PM
10

Quality comment. Does OP really think dudes with the social capital to arrange a party that lots of hot women show up to are the same dudes on the internet saying how hard it is to get laid?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 08:41 AM
1

I didn't say a woman is my equal "just because I really want her." A woman is my equal if she is of similar quality across the variables that people care about (physical attractiveness, career success, social success, intelligence, etc.). Do you disagree with that notion?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 08:02 AM
21

I've been to many parties with copious amounts of alcohol. I have never seen a lot of hot women show up (it's always at least 2:1 male) and I can't recall a single instance of someone meeting a girl there and fucking her that same night. Your notion of partying sounds like it comes from TV and movies rather than lived experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 07:54 AM
6

as long as they are kind and well groomed most women give them a chance. lmao you cannot be serious. I'd love to know what you're basing this claim on. go to a park. go to the store. hell. talk to someone at the gas station the next time u visit. its like they did in the past. this is exactly how it was in the past before men became too greedy and stopped learning to love their mothers gender Wrong, this is how it was before feminists deemed that a man approaching a strange woman in public is an…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 07:36 AM
7

How are you unable to get the women you desire (young, thin, childless etc) yet think your are too good for the ones you can attract? Because people naturally want someone at least somewhat equivalent to themself, and the fact that (among younger adults) there are far more single men than single women actively looking to date guarantees that many men can't attain their equivalent. Young, fit, successful, childless men are repeatedly rejected by young, thin, childless women. Young, fat, unsuccess…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 03:35 AM
1

I don’t see anything in that article that remotely implies male attractiveness increases up to age 40 and then plateaus. Can you point out what you were referring to? Also, that article uses data from way back when OLD was considered a weirdo thing to do, and thus is unlikely to be a representative sample. And there are some ludicrously awful interpretations of data in there that are tangential and I won’t get into, but add to my distrust of its conclusions.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/22 10:01 PM
2

I've been on dozens of first dates in my life, and social media almost never came up (either before or during). The once or twice I was asked for my Instagram handle, the fact that I don't have one was not an automatic rejection. Either women don't care about this that much, or they do what I always did to them and covertly google all the details they have on you to try and figure out your last name so they can cyberstalk you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/22 06:44 AM
2

How are you measuring “attractiveness” from OKCupid statistics? Because my suspicion is that you’re using response rate or something like that, which is a flawed measure. 40+ men are messaging older women with far fewer options than whom younger men pursue. Naturally, this leads to a higher response rate for older men, but does not imply higher attractiveness. To determine attractiveness, you’d need to measure responses from the same pool of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 09:42 PM
11

What? That's literally the exact thing the 2nd half of my OP addresses.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 07:33 AM
1

No one, to my knowledge, is keeping stats on who's victimized *while minding their own business*, so we can't really do more than rely on our intuition for that one. You're probably correct about material luxury. I'm still skeptical about the leisure time claim. Men work more hours at their job, women do more housework. I don't think we really know how that balances out.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:53 AM
2

How did you quantify which gender's problems are shittier? Wouldn't it make more sense to just say you have no idea if what men go through is shittier than what women go through?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:44 AM
3

That's fair, although I'm not sure why muggers would be more likely to target a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:40 AM
10

Yeah cause those phrases are rock solid proof of that FDS members are wonderful queens and TRP members are uneducated virgin losers. If you're not a rightist doing a parody to make SJWs look bad, then you're the least logical person I've ever encountered.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:23 AM
10

I just challenged him on this very point, but come on, surely you must know that one datapoint is not an argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:18 AM
14

You really do sound like a hyperbolic right-wing parody of an SJW. This is too ridiculous for me to take seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:12 AM
0

Thanks for sharing that. Honestly, I'm surprised to see that gender gap in the Netherlands, where (correct me if I'm wrong) there isn't the gang problem that we have here in the US. Maybe a lot of it is bar fights and what not?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:08 AM
11

Okay, now I'm thoroughly convinced you're doing satire.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:04 AM
8

lol okay, I honestly can't tell if you're a parody account.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 05:01 AM
4

Just curious, what's your explanation when a man demonstrates a lack of empathy for women?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:55 AM
9

Lol yeah, men never experience hardships like homelessness. And of course women work sooo much harder, which is why all of the professions that require complex technical skills that take years to learn, or backbreaking physical labor, are dominated by women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:53 AM
3

^That does not imply women are safer. That's just a product of men being the ones involved in gang and drug activity. Common sense tells us that women are more likely than men to be targeted while minding their own business.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:48 AM
23

You're referring to the fact that men are statistically more likely to be the victim of a violent crime. This is misleading, as it's due to men being way more involved in shady gang and drug shit. Common sense would tell you that women are more frequently targeted while minding their own business. As to the rest of your post, I agree western women have it pretty damn good, but some of your individual claims are a bit questionable. I'm not sure, for example, where you're getting that women enjoy …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:40 AM
6

Lol my OP was very clear that women here lack empathy as well. I'm not debating that.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:12 AM
28

Did I say anything about pity fucking men, or putting their desires above yours? That second part of your comment makes me skeptical of the first part.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:05 AM
2

I'm interested to see what you're referring to, can you link?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:02 AM
12

Risking your life to bring another human being into the world will never be equal to a man needing to have status, game etc. And here's a textbook example of dismissing the other gender's struggles. Have you thought through what it takes for a man who doesn't naturally have "status, game etc." to try and achieve those things, what his fate is if his efforts fail, and what mental state that leaves him in?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 04:01 AM
4

I'm agreeing with that as a general rule, but pointing out that this sub in particular selects for disenfranchised men whose frustrations with women prevent them from having the typical amount of empathy.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 03:50 AM
6

^This is the case in mainstream culture. But on this sub, I see men forget that women have struggles unique to them outside the realm of dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 03:35 AM
2

Same reason you might complain about a Doordash delivery taking too long. As hard as it is to comprehend for a 3rd world person who has to scrounge for food, your environment has set an expectation that you can barely lift a finger and have a large quantity of delicious food whenever you want it. When you have an experience that falls short of that expectation, you're annoyed. Same with women and their expectations when it comes to dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 11:42 PM
12

This is the most glaring strawman I’ve ever seen in my life on any topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 08:05 PM
0

Here's a question, and maybe this whole topic merits its own post, but in that case, you're just two people who happen to have 3 degrees of separation while being single at the same time. There's absolutely no reason to believe you're particularly compatible. What are the chances you actually have the compatibility that would sustain a happy relationship? Isn't it much better to be able to pick someone out of a large pool whom you particularly mesh with?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:37 AM
3

Go to a trendy bar on a Saturday night, count up the men and women, and get back to me on that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:27 AM
2

Absolutely. The point is to challenge women's assumptions about men's romantic struggles, not to discourage men from trying all different avenues.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:25 AM
2

Yep, I hear that. The fact that you ultimately arrived at there being no good answer, just keep grinding until you hopefully meet someone, is exactly the point I'm hoping to convey to the women here who trivialize the issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:22 AM
16

That's a good point, I've noticed this too. It is much more often men than women who break their comfort zone to meet people in general. Yet the narrative of the women here is that women are out there dying to meet a man, if only men could be bothered to stop jerking off long enough to go outside.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:19 AM
3

It depends a lot on chance too tbh. It's a possible solution, but the odds aren't that great even if you do put yourself out there quite a bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:14 AM
4

No, that's not what I was basically saying. Anyway, what are some examples of activities such men should sign up for?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:12 AM
2

Yeah he probably should've specified, the sort of bar smelly 50+ men with missing teeth don't hang out in.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:11 AM
6

Geez, did you read the OP? You're exactly who needs to.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:05 AM
2

To be clear, I'm not looking for a solution for myself. I've had girlfriends and currently have one. Just sharing what the journey has taught me, which I'm compelled to do because it's so opposite of the mainstream narrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 05:02 AM
1

I've been down that road and it never brought me in contact with a woman I'd be interested in. It can, but it's way too far from guaranteed to be a real solution to the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:54 AM
1

That's not mere introversion, that's utter ineptitude.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:52 AM
8

Fix your life to allow for hobbies, socializing and soft skills so you can meet organically This is easy to say, but rolling into some Meetup groups or doing some adult kickball leagues or whatever is not by any means a guarantee that you'll end up in proximity to the sorts of women you want. The vast majority of men in their late twenties on up either need "inorganic" ways of meeting women, or would if they were single. It's not a matter of social ineptitude, it's just life.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:45 AM
5

No, they don't. Those women can easily go on a dating app, or post up at a bar, and land as many dates as they have time for.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:40 AM
1

Of course everyone will be sought after by people much less attractive than them. The question is whether only trying to 'date up' is to blame for men's dating woes. Very different question.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:32 AM
10

Do you mean go out and approach strange women? Because oh boy do women lash out at that very concept. Or do you mean get some hobbies that get your ass out of the house? Because, yeah, obviously everyone should do that, but as you acknowledged, that often does not eliminate the need to do things like OLD.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 04:28 AM
1

I mostly tried to date a few years younger than me. Never below the half + 7 rule of thumb. This is not unusual, it's the male OLD experience in a nutshell. The ratios guarantee it. Imagine you're put in a room with 15 men, and 50 other women who are really aggressive and motivated to find a man. Everyone is told to pair off. Immediately, the hottest woman is surrounded by 5 out of the 15 men. You think you wouldn't struggle like hell to land someone good? Then imagine if someone suggested your …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 05:31 PM
1

Unattractive women can easily get unattractive men.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 06:35 AM
4

A woman is pursued on a dating app because the men pursuing her don't know what they want? That doesn't follow at all. Quality women go overlooked even though you acknowledge any decent looking woman will be pursued? Again, does not follow at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 06:25 AM
7

Literally nothing you've said makes a shred of sense, and this is pointless.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 06:18 AM
5

Put up pics of a decent looking, but very much not "12/10" woman on a dating app, and report back how much attention she receives.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 06:08 AM
10

What reality are you living in?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 06:03 AM
2

Yeah, consider that men who don't have much of a social network never really benefit from women viewing them more charitably as they get to know them. All they know is the suspicion/hostility/utter lack of regard that they experience from dating apps and cold approaches. From that perspective, everything certainly looks fucked. It's a shame this discussion is buried deep in a thread where no one will see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 04:36 AM
1

It is confusing to us, and this insight is enlightening. You see the way men here who are very reliant on OLD (I've been one) think. They think every ordinary plain Jane out there is a delusional egomaniac who sees 99% of men as beneath her. And within the context of OLD, that's pretty damn true. The idea that those same women who would swipe left on us in a millisecond, or blow off a cold approach at the bar, might develop attraction for us if we knew them organically is not intuitive to us. Bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 04:17 AM
1

That's really interesting. Do you think that's typical for women?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 03:51 AM
1

Would you say women are attracted to a much higher percentage (than 1-5%) of men they have significant interaction with?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 03:26 AM
6

Because there are nerd women too.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 02:37 AM
2

A small proportion of men behave like thirsty simps, and a large proportion live in quiet desperation.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 10:42 PM
5

No, not the majority. But orders of magnitude more than in other parts of the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 09:34 PM
36

You’re in Eastern Europe. I assume the vast majority of posters here are from US/Canada/Western Europe/Aus/NZ. That’s where the dating market has gone off the rails. Men from these places consider Eastern Europe a destination to escape the problems encountered at home.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 09:18 PM
2

True. My comment was more about what's theoretically plausible than what's typically the case. I've seen FDSers here claim they take good and ignore the bad, then go on to spew unabashed female supremacy rhetoric. It's quite something.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 06:17 PM
2

Some men do pump and dump in their own league, I'll give you that. But there's no way the probability of attaining commitment is equal for a woman dating in her own league vs. above it. That does not make a lick of sense. Why would a man be equally likely to commit when dating down and when dating in his league?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 07:07 AM
4

Yes. To be clear, I don't count disproving that women's ovaries inflame from reading, or any other nonsensical conjecture, as a point for socialization theory. I'm only considering the set of observable differences in male vs. female behavior. For those differences, I do not agree that they're usually shown to be a product of socialization rather than biology when tested.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 06:58 AM
1

I disagree with that, and your OP did not even come close to effectively making that case.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 06:36 AM
4

both sexes are choosing to depart from those roles. No, the types of work that create the most value have shifted with technology. Men and women still, through their own choices, sort themselves into different types of work.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 04:52 AM
18

Everyone already accepts a slew of biological differences between men and women, but somehow the differences we perceive only become controversial when they regard the brain. The notion that the brain is uniquely exempt from sex differences is absurd on its face, especially given that we see plenty of universal behavioral differences, in some cases amplified in more egalitarian cultures. For example, men outnumber women in STEM basically everywhere, and Scandinavian countries have some of the la…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 04:41 AM
0

Lol, you took the time and labor to come here and rant about the awfulness of men. Now it's too much time and labor to support your deranged claims.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 03:57 AM
0

Please elaborate on what men are currently putting you through that justifies cruel behavior toward men in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 02:09 AM
11

This is quite relatable. Early 30's me has a certain clarity that early 20's, starving for affection and sex me lacked.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 02:00 AM
0

There is no "get your shit together" on FDS. What sub are you reading? It's primarily a male bashing outlet, with a touch of vetting strategy mixed in, which ranges from identifying legitimate red flags to making absurd and ludicrous demands. Whereas the primary focus of TRP is not just getting your shit together, but improving in ways that are well above and beyond what the average person even thinks about. There's unfortunately some less than charitable regard for women there, but bashing wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 01:59 AM
1

Oops, sorry, either I misread your previous comment as saying her pics are not accurate, or you edited to correct yourself. Given the information you've provided, I agree her giving off a very tepid vibe on dates is a likely culprit.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 01:49 AM
7

Yeah, I thought I was pretty clear that a woman who has their level of entitlement, or partakes in that cringey Queen nonsense, would not make a good partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/22 05:02 AM
0

This idea that RP and FDS are at all equivalent, I have to push back on to the fullest extent. Have you looked at TRP, or just listened to its detractors? The bulk of it is self-improvement advice. You have to dig a bit deeper to find the toxic elements, which are a pretty small minority of what's discussed there. FDS, on the other hand, is conspicuously and comically absurd from the moment you read a single sentence. Lots of people think it's parody at first, because FDSers are such outlandish …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/22 04:59 AM
1

"No good men" could have other causes besides dating out of one's league (like being attracted to personality traits that correlate with being a dick), but consistently dating out of one's league is one way to make it very likely you'll come away thinking there are no good men who want to commit. Our fundamental point of disagreement is this statement: the risk of being treated as a sex doll is exactly the same regardless of which league you're in dating in. Men are notoriously willing to bang b…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/22 03:03 AM
75

I'm gonna go a tad against the grain here. It's at least conceivable to me that an attractive, pleasant woman could read FDS just for the tips on identifying plate-spinners and abusers, maybe even comment now and then, while fully recognizing that most of the sub's content is cartoonishly toxic. If you're talking about a woman who thoroughly embraces FDS and fits in there like a glove, well, you already knew what answer you were gonna get from any mentally competent person, and thank you for bri…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/22 02:52 AM
1

So she gets dates with men that, by your own estimation, range from equally attractive to 2 points more attractive than her. That’s really damn good. If the problem is guys losing interest after a date or two, then she’s failing to leave a good enough impression on dates. She may be a kind-hearted person, but also boring and/or bad at connecting with people. I don’t know what exactly it is, but it’s something. In the dating world, people want a heck of a lot more than just kindness and good inte…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 11:28 PM
3

I’m not doubting that. My argument is that there are plenty of good men willing to treat a girlfriend well, and such a man is attainable to any woman. I’m not saying there aren’t some men that are just plain scumbags. Women aren’t going to lament that there are “no good men” because one boyfriend treated them shitty. Those “no good men” complaints come from a different place.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 07:10 PM
2

I’m not trying to tell anyone what they should want. If a woman genuinely loves the casual sex lifestyle and doesn’t want a relationship, I’ll congratulate her on finding happiness. I’m giving women not getting what they want the reason they’re not getting what they want. If they already knew, then they wouldn’t be bitter and frustrated about their situation; they’d go change it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 07:07 PM
12

The delusion of those men being in her league is extremely common. It shows up in the form of lamenting about a lack of good men willing to commit. That complaint is, of course, utter nonsense, but it appears true from the perspective of a woman being callously used as a sexdoll by men out of her league, and not realizing her treatment is a symptom of getting with men out of her league. A woman who understands the situation would at least have it occur to her that if she gives men in her league …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 06:26 PM
2

And, as I said, men only use them because that's where young/hot women can be found. If young/hot women flocked to fucking eHarmony, then men would follow in droves. Men do not give an ounce of shit about the nature of the app itself, only the quantity/quality of women who use it. Thus, it's young/hot women who control which apps become popular. And those women have spoken loud and clear; they want the most low-effort experience conceivable.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 04:17 AM
2

None in the initial stages, but women do try pretty hard once they catch feelings for a guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 04:04 AM
1

Define how she "struggles" on OLD. When men say they struggle, they mean they get virtually no interest from anyone who is at all comparable to them. Does your friend get some steady interest from mid-30's men who are 3/10 in looks? Or is she rejected right off the bat by 99% of such men?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 03:58 AM
209

I don't speak for all men, but for me, yes, I would rather stick with a quality woman I found when I was 20 than spend my 20's and 30's chasing casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 03:34 AM
6

Women don't need to, and men have social incentive to act like they don't need to.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 02:27 AM
2

Nice theory, but reality proves otherwise. There are dating websites and apps that provide the features you think would be appealing to women. Women don't use them; and when they do, they put in so little effort that those extra features are pointless. Tinder and Bumble did not become popular because men love the swiping concept. They became popular because young/hot women love the low effort they require, and men go wherever young/hot women can be found, because that's literally all they give a…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 01:08 AM
2

Oh boy, I've seen this "women are just better" narrative way too many times on this sub. An average looking woman is not looksmatched with a top 20% man because she's wearing makeup in her pics.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 12:01 AM
27

Yeah, I've had periods of my life when I had all my shit together, was as busy/active as one could hope to be, and wasn't specifically pursuing women. Lo and behold, that didn't magically get me a girlfriend or even laid. Dating requires targeted effort for many (if not most) guys, and it's mind-boggling why anyone is opposed to that.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 11:41 PM
1

I know a lot of "soft upper class" people as you describe, and I've never heard of Raya. I seriously doubt that's a common way couples are forming.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 11:32 PM
0

Just photoshop an ugly woman and an ugly man, create a profile for each and see the difference. Seriously, it would be so refreshing to see someone like OP actually attempt to test their claims. Instead, they just go around stating their preconceived ideas as fact without a shred of supporting evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 11:29 PM
3

This has gone off the rails. My original comment was about trying to meet cute 7’s, not models.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 10:41 PM
3

I don’t think I’m top 10% overall. Just my best few pics are. I may be top 20% overall though.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 09:03 PM
10

Guys who could put up OLD pics that rank more like top 2%. Guys who have exceptional game and social lives, so as not to need OLD. Guys who get lucky (right place, right time, high compatibility) and land a hot girl they couldn’t usually get for a LTR.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 09:01 PM
10

I did say that my pics mostly ranked top 10% on photofeeler. I wouldn’t call that “handsome af” but I would call that easily enough to be happy with landing a looksmatched girl. I had a very good (six figure) job listed on the apps too. I recognize that I was passed over by my looksmatches for hotter guys… and that’s exactly the point I’m making that disproves OP’s thesis.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 08:58 PM
31

I’m tall, muscular and lean, and most of the OLD pics I used ranked top 10% on photofeeler. I still felt like I was battling for crumbs on dating apps. By no means did I receive serious interest from women whose pics would rank in that ballpark. If you don’t think my experience is sufficient proof, ask yourself how it’s even mathematically possible for most men to get their looksmatches from OLD or bars when the ratios are always massively lopsided. Many men do end up with a looksmatched girlfri…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 08:40 PM
2

Yes, they very well may not be. Most STEM guys have personalities that don’t climb social hierarchies and don’t connect well with women. That can’t be compensated for.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 08:30 PM
1

Yes. Since you either won’t or can’t interpret a simple list of percentages, I’ve lost interest in this discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 06:26 PM
1

Did you not read past “OLD,” where I list more ways people meet (to comprise the majority) and then provide a link to show that my claim is true?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 06:00 PM
1

Lol I’m well aware that STEM men don’t all struggle and lots of non-STEM men struggle… so what? My point is simply that bringing up crude humor to explain people’s dating woes doesn’t hold up, because anyone can easily observe that the quiet guys who don’t make those jokes tend to struggle the most. And no, the vast majority of adult relationships are formed via OLD, bars, or friend groups outside of work. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.statista.com/chart/amp/20822/way-of-meeting-partner-heter…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 05:52 PM
3

You’re commenting on a post about STEM men’s dating struggles, so naturally, I thought your screed about their humor style was meant to be relevant to their dating struggles. No, men who are bad at making jokes either make lame jokes or don’t make any. These are the men who have the worst dating results. I have no idea what you mean then by relationships having a background at work.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 05:03 PM
2

Geez, you sound like a blast at parties. Your theory needs some revision; the men who have the least dating success are those who aren’t good at making jokes on the fly, and the vast majority of adult relationships do not form among coworkers.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 04:43 PM
–

Come on man, there is zero substance here. If you want to create a post, you need to offer an actual topic to discuss.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/22 05:09 AM
5

Single women are way less active in looking for dates than single men. Thus, any place one might go to look for dates (OLD being the most obvious example) has incredibly lopsided ratios. With these ratios, men's only options are to date way down or not at all. Men who opt to date down generally won't commit, and just take whatever sex they can get. This means that women who, naturally, give their time to the most attractive men that pursue them, will keep encountering men that are just after eas…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 09:11 PM
9

You want these people to notice you in a positive way... and you behave like this? Due to this I only talk to older women and try to ignore women in my age range when possible, inconvenience them, or just don’t help them at all. ... Sometimes women my age are persistent or don’t get the hint I don’t really wanna talk to them, so I act somewhat normal and talk to them but I just ask them troll questions or make them the butt of jokes around other coworkers or guy friends. I have a pretty easy que…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 07:25 AM
10

Idk maybe I’m Super naive but I feel like if anyone put 100% effort into finding a partner they could do it pretty quickly, no? If you think this is true with the stipulation that the partner you find isn't of way lower value, then yes, you are super naive. Men without a particularly active social circle find this task next-to-impossible, hence why they flock to the internet to analyze how it can be done. I can tell you from experience that other achievements people tend to find difficult (earni…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 03:32 AM
1

If you have a large social circle and a personality that naturally connects with women, then sure, women are not hard to get. A lot of guys (maybe most) don't have those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 01:08 AM
11

We need to stop looking at this idea of a female wanting a man with some value as such a bad thing. Why would a woman want a fat slob who sits on the couch all day playing videos games? Holy strawman. This is what you got from reading red pill content? No red pill person takes issue with women wanting a man of value. TRP takes issue with women who give themselves to men that are way out of their league, who obviously don't give a fuck about them and just want low-investment sex, and then complai…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 12:45 AM
20

I see a way to reconcile this with OP's claim. Female attraction can be triggered in either of two ways: Emotional connection, idiosyncratic compatibility, yada yada A guy that's way out of her league
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 12:33 AM
2

That's an interesting thought. This whole thing might be a feedback loop. Why is it so tough for men to find someone? Because men (as a whole) look way harder, meaning way more competition. Why do men look way harder? Because it's so tough for men to find someone, they feel like they need to.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/22 12:22 AM
35

There's scientific evidence that contradicts your premise. Example- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16095799/
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 09:13 PM
1

I've had that experience with the matches I got on Hinge, but they always ended up putting obnoxiously little effort into conversing after we match. Have you been able to get a lot of decent/high-effort convos out of them?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 07:53 PM
1

Many of those couples didn't go around looking for someone to date; they just knew each other, maybe as early as college or even high school, and the relationship grew organically. In these cases, the woman's market power to pull men out of her league was never realized. OLD can also produce looksmatched couples. Once in a while, due to very high idiosyncratic compatibility, a woman will happen to choose a man who's on her own level, despite the flood of messages from 'Chads.' When a woman does …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 07:49 PM
4

There's a roughly equal number of men and women, so the difference in how hard it is for a man to find someone, vs. how hard it is for a woman, has to be explained by some differing behavior. People here think it's entirely because Chad has 4 girls in his rotation, but I don't think that can fully explain what we see. I think the main reason it's so difficult for men is because lots of single women simply don't go looking, thus the ratios are skewed anywhere one might look, online or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 07:34 PM
1

This effect can also be observed (with the attention coming from women!) by changing your location to certain parts of the world. People who say things like "if women don't want to fuck you, they're not the problem, you are" need to understand what a market is. If that same "problem" guy would be heavily sought after by gay men and non-western women, then the problem is the western hetero dating market. It's like saying to a Nigerian with an engineering degree "if companies don't want to offer y…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 08:16 AM
1

All the pics I used rated in the low 9's or high 8's on PhotoFeeler, and I was still fighting for crumbs in online dating. Maybe consider the possibility that something you hear over and over from men who use OLD isn't bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 08:00 AM
19

Yeah, people have this idea that ratios are skewed only when there's the prospect of casual sex. That's a myth that needs to die. Men are far more likely than women to pursue both sex and relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 07:46 AM
7

The OP's app would require a hefty subscription fee to deliver on those features. You're not getting young, desirable women to pay to date. And if you don't get them to pay, you won't get very many other people to pay either.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 07:38 AM
1

Unless they are putting me on dates with women that are some of the most compatible that I have ever dealt with That's the selling point, but I agree it's not very realistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:50 AM
4

She didn't say anything specific to women she was setting me up with. I have no idea if they did a background check, but they did interview me. If you find someone with a good career listed on LinkedIn, and they speak like someone with a good career, a background check is pretty unnecessary. Skeezy guys aren't good at pretending to be well-to-do professionals.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:39 AM
1

Can you dig up a link to any of those articles? That's interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:35 AM
2

Scouting strangers on LinkedIn is precisely the kind of thing they need to do to find the professional types their clients are looking for. The talking about clients' demands was just a brief aside and no big deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:27 AM
4

You don't pay date-by-date, you enter into a fixed term contract where they guarantee to land you at least X number of dates. And no matter the term, the price is $1,000+ per guaranteed date.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:22 AM
2

It very much happened, and I still have no idea what your objection is.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:14 AM
3

I looked into it, and I forget exactly what they charge, but it ends up coming to over $1,000 per person you go on a date with through them. OLD is a grind but not that much of a grind lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:13 AM
5

You seriously think that sounds far-fetched?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:08 AM
3

Found me on LinkedIn.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:05 AM
2

Matchmakers do recruit like headhunters; I've been on the receiving end.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 03:03 AM
20

I was actually recruited by a matchmaker to be set up with their female clients. The women they put in front of me tended to be in their 30's and not particularly fit or attractive. I agreed to a date with one and she was... not a pleasant person. I had one convo with the matchmaker where she kinda ranted about how overly picky female clients tend to be. So true that normal women have a super easy time dating, and thus anything that requires money or effort will inevitably select for ones you pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 02:50 AM
34

Hinge, Coffee Meets Bagel, Match, OKCupid... all more relationship-oriented dating apps, all still with very uneven ratios and the same problems as Tinder, but to a lesser extreme. I've used them heavily when single and hardly touched Tinder. An app with the features you describe would have to charge exorbitant fees, which would prevent it from gaining a large enough userbase to be worthwhile. Young/desirable women would be particularly put off by this model, as they expect dating to be effortle…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 02:09 AM
48

I would think most adults have been through a heartbreak at least once. I know I certainly have. Ascribing people's opinions to "hatred" is almost always a lame strawman. People vent frustrations here, often in ways that are poorly thought out, and come off unlikable and whiny. But I haven't seen anyone actually express hatred for an entire gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/22 11:07 PM
14

Your girlfriend isn't going to ditch you "the second you lapse." If you're only used to chasing women, then you're used to being scrutinized to an insane degree, so it's understandable how you'd think that way. But when a woman develops feelings for you, the level of scrutiny falls off a cliff, and it's pretty hard for you to do wrong in her eyes. That's not to say that you couldn't, over time, behave like such a blubbering wuss that you erase all of her attraction for you. You certainly can and…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/22 05:49 PM
1

For me, interesting is not about having quirky hobbies or traveling the world or whatever else people usually associate with being interesting. It’s about how the person’s brain works. Some people just have the most predictable, cliched take on everything. No matter what unique life experiences they’ve had, they can’t offer any original insight into those things, beyond the obvious stuff you’d already expect them to say. These people are what I call “boring.” Some other common boring traits: bel…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/22 06:07 PM
8

Let this post be a cautionary tale about the bitterness and resentment toward women that can result from using OLD as a man. Dude, you have to understand that OLD selects for the worst women, and then brings out the worst in them (due to ridiculously unwarranted levels of attention). You're not seeing a fair sample of the female sex; you're seeing a distillation of the godawful. We're all aware that our society has become way too fat, but it's only on dating apps where you'll see a majority of f…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/22 08:22 AM
1

A lot of non-religious women complain about being used for sex by men who don't care about them, and this lifestyle prevents you from being used for sex by men who don't care about you. That's why a non-religious woman would do it. Casual sex is mostly a form of carnal pleasure for men. For women it's usually just a response to getting interest from a man who's out of their league, which ends in pain when he pumps and dumps her. If you listen to women, they pretty much all say they get more plea…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/22 01:07 AM
2

Women are, at the same time, less shallow than men, and pickier about looks than men. When I say women are less shallow, I mean they're less preoccupied with a man's appearance relative to his other qualities. They judge men more holistically than men judge women. However, that doesn't imply women have more lax standards when it comes to looks. Women are still harsher critics of men's appearance than vice versa, even if appearance is a smaller percentage of their overall evaluation, because wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/22 12:48 AM
2

Do you know women who were pressured into marriages with men they're not attracted to?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:40 AM
2

I said nothing about believing in God. Reread the last sentence of my comment: "Why is this such an unrealistic ask for secular/mainstream women?" Also, in what way does this approach sacrifice carnal pleasure? And that's an interesting observation, but I'll need more than anecdata to agree there's actually a plague of dead bedrooms and cheating in religious households (relative to non-religious ones).
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:38 AM
1

lol do you actually think Christian women are forced into marriages with men that disgust them?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:31 AM
1

I said nothing about nasty acts, just that Christians are not against enjoying [marital] sex. I actually do have a non-promiscuous, non-religious girlfriend, but that's not the point. The point is that secular women are perfectly capable of showing the restraint that religious women do, if what they really want is a husband rather than being used as a sexdoll by Chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:23 AM
3

And your point is?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:17 AM
0

I'm not buying your premise that these women are hapless doormats with selfish prick husbands. Your depiction of Christian marriage sounds like a caricatured dystopia that only exists in the minds of atheists. I say that as an atheist.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:16 AM
4

This still isn't anything resembling a counterargument.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:05 AM
1

Do you even know how religious households work? Most of them have limited sex just for procreation. This is flat out wrong. I know people like this. They have lots of sex for enjoyment. They aren’t having the freaky BDSM sex you want. I have no idea if they are or not, but why the hell would you assume that's what I want? I’m sure you can find those women in church communities but you do not, why’s that? Because I'm not gonna spend my life pretending to believe in ridiculous supernatural nonsens…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 08:00 AM
1

I said nothing about the distant past. Modern Christian women do this.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 07:53 AM
6

No one’s natural self is lazy, fat and a homebody. I flat out couldn't disagree more with this claim. Some people are just like that. I don't really know what else to say, it's just entirely self-evident. don’t act like a hard ass if you’re a romantic. Don’t act like you like movies when you hate them. Don’t act like you love dancing when you don’t. Don’t be something you’re not and pretend to be in to things or do things just to get a girl. This advice I agree with. But see, it's more granular …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 07:50 AM
6

Plenty of more hardcore Christian women forego casual sex and settle down [relatively] young with a man who's in their league. As far as I'm aware, there is no plague of dead bedrooms or cheating among these types. Why is this such an unrealistic ask for secular/mainstream women?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 07:27 AM
1

This is ridiculous. Respond to what I actually say, not some strawman nonsense you imagine in your head. I said nothing about my hypothetical character sulking or feeling victimized. I contrived said character for the sole purpose of asking one very simple question which you still haven't adequately answered: How can he simultaneously "just be himself" and follow your advice to change himself? And please do not respond to that question with yet another angry rant about how he needs to stop being…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 07:17 AM
5

By the premise of my question, that is not being himself. My point is that you can't tell people to "just be yourself" and then in the next breath tell them what they need to change about themself. That's talking out of both sides of your mouth. Pick one. And I have no idea why you felt the need get all aggressive with that "men aren't entitled to jack shit" feminist boilerplate that has zero to do with anything I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 06:58 AM
5

The key is to be confident in who you are. Do shit that interests you and take good care of yourself. Get in shape. Get a good job. What if someone's natural self is an unconfident, lazy, fat homebody? How can he simultaneously "just be himself" and follow this advice?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 06:45 AM
5

Yes. Being a fat slob is a product of laziness and apathy, not a lack of self-esteem or self-love or whatever else.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 06:37 AM
11

So if a dude is a socially inept fat slob, what's really holding him back from getting the pussy he wants is a lack of self-acceptance. Yeah, not buying it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 06:30 AM
5

Yes, men still simp even if they have the option to pay to get their dick sucked.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 03:22 AM
7

I'm not just assuming. We can see what legal prostitution has changed about the dating markets in Nevada, Netherlands, and Australia (nothing discernable). I think that's proof enough that most men want more from women than just having their cock serviced.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 02:10 AM
7

This topic has been beaten to death, and no, legal prostitution would not have the effect you dream of. The dating market is not any less screwed up in places where prostitution is legal. Men do not simply want a place to put their dick once in a while. They want real human connection, a sense of achievement and validation, and free/effortless repeat sex. Prostitutes cannot offer those things, and thus are not an adequate substitute for attracting women. For the record, I 100% support legalizati…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/22 01:42 AM
–

This post sounds like a longer way of saying "be intensely appealing to the small percentage of people you want, rather than mildly appealing to everyone," which is some of the most important advice I've ever heard. It's also, IMO, a huge area of failure for red pill philosophy. TRP seems obsessed with becoming a male 8 and then saying all the right shit so you can bed as many female 5's as possible. A much better path to happiness would be, become a male 8, and say shit that's unique and true t…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 10:54 PM
–

This would drastically reduce young women's (currently exorbitant) market power. Value is a function of supply and demand. In the real world, the supply of attractive women is severely constricted by the fact that female beauty is so acutely concentrated in women's late teens and twenties. Male value, by contrast, remains fairly steady throughout a man's twenties and thirties, and, for those who take good care of themselves, even forties. Thus, we have a wide age range of men viably pursuing a n…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 10:43 PM
3

By fat or low status guys, no. By hot guys they'd prefer, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 05:16 AM
2

lol I didn't say anything pertaining to the CMV tag. My problem with your OP is that it's not even written precisely enough for me to agree or disagree with it. You constantly see "toxic masculinity". Okay, can you explain what exactly you mean by toxic masculinity, and how it has any relation to red pill teachings? You want a strong, level-headed partner. Okay, again, can you explain what that has to do with red pill teachings? You believe men are harmed by having a defeatist mentality. Again, …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 04:54 AM
3

Melbourne Australia Not to take anything away from your quality physique and messages, but I think this is the main thing. You live in a major city. I live in an exurban area. I've searched through girls in New York City out of curiosity, and the difference in talent between there and the burbs is so staggering I can't even do it justice with words. In my area, the number of 7-8/10 caliber girls active on OKCupid at any given time is probably in single digits if there are any at all. They all se…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 04:44 AM
2

I had a thoughtful profile and wrote thoughtful messages on OKC too, but still without nearly those results (though I am currently seeing one of the very few women I met off there). I wonder if you're in a great location. Another thing that shocked me about your testimony was that you even found more than a few attractive girls on OKC. In my area, even a somewhat above average OKC girl would probably be bottom 30% somewhere like a college campus.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 03:21 AM
1

That's interesting. I have very toned muscles and visible abs too, but never had the experience of reasonably attractive OLD girls throwing themselves at me like that. However, my lifting progress hits a plateau before I get really big (i.e. I look more like a pro soccer player than a bodybuilder), and I've always avoided posting shirtless douche pics. Maybe women like the roided out shirtless douche aesthetic much more than they let on?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 02:43 AM
0

Were you swiping right on unattractive girls?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 02:28 AM
2

No. Many of my friends frequented bars in our 20’s. We all have college degrees and stable full time jobs.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 08:52 PM
1

Well there’s your answer to where the ocean of attention is.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 07:27 PM
3

Have you been on a dating app?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 12:44 PM
2

I meant the question to include all stages of rejection, including the very earliest, e.g. swiping left on a guy, or brushing off his approach. This is naturally where the vast majority of rejections will occur. I'm guessing most men see the question this way. But most of the women who answered are only considering the guys the rejected after knowing them, which makes B seem a lot more reasonable to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 07:05 AM
1

This sounds like the realest answer so far. It's pretty true to what I've experienced. I've had plenty of dates where we got along fine and had no trouble conversing until I finally cut it off after several hours. I don't really feel much in the way of emotional connection, and I assume neither does she. But the differences are (1) I'm still excited about the prospect of fucking her, and (2) I come in wanting it to work because I dread the amount of work it'll take to land dates with other girls…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 04:20 AM
3

I’m guessing you swipe right on everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 03:15 AM
3

So is it fair to say you never felt like dating was a struggle?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 03:13 AM
4

This is pretty much it right here. If I thought her post merited a nuanced/logical rebuttal, I would’ve written almost the exact same thing (but probably not said it as well).
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 09:28 PM
3

“Rich people definitely don’t have it easier than poor people. Rich people may have an easier time affording stuff, but they have to filter through so many trash products just to find something worth buying.”
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 09:12 PM
31

Maybe I can summarize your point more concisely (correct me if I'm off): Western culture has become progressive where progressivism suits women's desires, and remained tradcon where tradcon-ism suits women's desires. I'm up in the air on how true that is. I can't really think of any counterexamples though, can anyone else?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 05:48 AM
4

Caveat: All of the following applies to secular dating only. Male whore = Desirable and successful. Female whore = Impulsive, fucks out of her league. Male virgin = Unwanted loser. Female virgin = By choice, saving it for the right guy. It's simply not the same thing. While I wouldn't blame a virgin who had no interest in a player, or even someone with an average sexual past, that's not usually what happens. Even low n women prefer average n or high n guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 03:33 AM
2

Women aren't so socially inept that they can't meet your effort halfway if they really want to. The problem is they very seldom want to. They're only interested enough to bother putting in effort for a miniscule percentage of men, which is a form of pickiness. Rest assured, if you ever run across a woman who, for whatever reason, sees you as exactly what she's looking for, she will make it a breeze for you to connect with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 05:31 PM
2

These are not assignments of blame, they're prudent tips to avoid being victimized. People say the same type of shit about getting mugged.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 05:27 AM
1

Even if women don’t come easily, there’s still plenty of hope to run across one that you just hit it off with, for whatever reason. Happens to tons of guys that couldn’t get pussy on demand if their lives depended on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 05:07 AM
1

I don't think this sounds unreasonable at all, but do you have a source?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 04:12 AM
3

This is a good example of my point that high-earning personalities don't connect with will most women. Men in lucrative areas of the corporate world are very direct. They don't deliberately put people down, but they don't have much regard for how their words will make anyone feel either; they just say what they think is true and that's that. If they disagree with something you say, they'll challenge it. And that's how they like it. That's the environment they want. But to the average woman, this…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 02:30 AM
1

Preferring in-shape women is not the same as thinking they're your looksmatches.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 12:30 AM
8

"Wealthy" can give people the wrong impression, like I'm chilling on a yacht with Bezos. But if wealthy can also mean enough to comfortably support a family with an upper middle-class lifestyle, then yes. I'm an example of what my comment described, where the mental traits that help me professionally make it difficult to connect with women. It's common. High-earning guys are not the "golden penised" players they're made out to be. They usually have sparse dating histories and do their best to ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 11:15 PM
37

I have all of that, and still, my takers have always been few and far between. The main problem is that making a lot of money correlates with having a super logical personality few women find attractive. Women who complain about a shortage of high-earning men want (on top of looks) an exciting, life of the party personality with the salary of a measured, logical engineer (who they'd find boring and weird). Basically, they've narrowed their pool down to people that barely exist, yet somehow manag…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:53 PM
1

Wow, great points. This isn't productive and I see no reason to continue.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:38 PM
120

According to mainstream news, men outearn women on average, but there's simultaneously a shortage of high-earning men for women to marry. Society has managed to oppress women in ways that aren't even mathematically possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:36 PM
1

The ratios are ample evidence of my claim, as I keep stating. They're not the only evidence, I could provide more, but I don't see the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:22 PM
2

No, I didn't ask you to provide evidence. I asked you to explain how it's even theoretically possible for guys be landing their looksmatches with a 4:1 ratio. My point (which should have been obvious) was that a 4:1 ratio is ample evidence that guys have trouble getting play from looksmatches on apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:09 PM
1

All you're really pointing out is that the standard of male attractiveness is much higher, which, obviously yeah. Thanks for proving our point.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:05 PM
6

"Crushing hard" on a girl is not remotely the same as thinking she's a looksmatch.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:01 PM
3

Please explain how guys would be able to land their looksmatch with a 4:1 ratio.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:00 PM
2

Great post. All of this is consistent with what I observed when I used Hinge. It's a hotter/classier crowd than other apps, but this couldn't be more true: I recall when I swiped as a straight male on Hinge, conversation with women was like pulling teeth, and it felt like I was just there to entertain them. The women on there all want to just sit back and evaluate your solo improv act, and now we see why they can. This is all the more reason that a quality woman will never say "oNlInE dAtInG iS …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 06:11 PM
40

Lol so you think chubby average dudes are going around thinking thin/fit girls are their looksmatches? This is made up nonsense without a shred of reasoning or evidence. It's not debatable that men on dating apps are nearly always rejected by their actual looksmatches. With the ratios being what they are, it can't really be any other way.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 07:16 AM
2

This sub is literally the only place I've ever heard the idea of drugging yourself to blunt your sexual urges, and people drop it as casually as they'd recommend allergy pills. And yet that's still less ridiculous than suggesting that porn and prostitutes are a decent substitute for actual human connection. I'm well aware it isn't the easiest thing to find if you're single and out of college, but I know plenty of dudes in [what appear from my perspective to be] happy relationships. I don't use t…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 04:08 AM
0

Stop meeting up with girls who don't have any pics that clearly show beneath their shoulders. Likewise, women frequently say that a lot of guys lie about their height. But yeah, I think any reasonable person would agree this sort of behavior is nothing more than a good way to waste your and other people's time.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 11:08 PM
24

There are countless testimonies of men using OLD, not being complete dumbasses about it like your friends complain of, and still getting nada. My own OLD experience as a man was that like 95% of the time (at least), my match was putting way less thought and effort into the convo than I was, such that there was really nothing I could do to make it go anywhere. You'd think from women's complaints that they'd be excited to converse with a guy who's articulate, respectful, and putting in effort, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 09:40 PM
17

Guys really want to axe a woman’s $100K/yr career rather than both work and hire a maid for like $25K or whatever it costs?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 07:27 PM
2

If there's roughly the same number of men and women, then there's roughly the same number of single men and single women. I mean it gets a little complicated with harems and age differences and what not, but roughly speaking, it's true. So it can't be that so many more women are taken, it's that single women are way less likely to do anything about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 06:47 AM
1

It's the only conclusion I can draw from the fact that any arena where people go explicitly to find someone is a sausage fest to a ridiculous degree. It's not just OLD. I've been to my share of "young professional singles nights" and what not.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 06:34 AM
1

I mean, the overwhelming majority of them just gave me absolutely nothing to work with texting wise. I would routinely show my convos to a female friend and watch her bewilderment. She couldn't figure out why they would match me in the first place if they're gonna put in that little effort. It felt much more like them talking to 30 guys simultaneously and just keeping me there as one of their options, than them being seriously interested and then put off by the lack of text chemistry.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 06:21 AM
1

These are good points, and none if it is wrong, but I think you're missing that the vast majority of those who are opting out of pursuing sex and relationships are women. Obviously, it doesn't take a mathematician to see the problem that creates for men who do pursue those things. It's a game of musical chairs and someone has to be left standing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 06:05 AM
1

When I did OLD I got a lot of matches with girls I felt were of similar value, but it turns out an OLD match almost never means sincere interest. To answer how I knew I wasn't overvaluing myself, most of the pics I used were top 10% on PhotoFeeler, and meanwhile I found myself physically attracted to around 20-25% of women on the apps, so mathematically, that net had to catch lots of women at or even below my level, but real interest from them was exceedingly rare. It's just an assumption of min…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 05:58 AM
1

I mean objectively, most Americans of either gender are fat, but all I said was I didn't have options that weren't for a long time. I met lots of women through OLD. Lots of high-earning men are introverts and have the same issue. I don't feel like you're discussing in good faith and I have no interest in continuing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 05:44 AM
1

I'm pointing out a legitimate social problem while having self-improved in every conceivable way to overcome it, so I don't think it's fair to characterize me as "whiny" or "wallowing in self-pity." That needs to be reserved fat incels who dress like they're 13. You have a point about survivor bias, but it's well known that sexlessness is increasing parabolically and marriage rates are plummeting, so it's not the full story.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 05:33 AM
2

Since all us American girls are all fat, ugly and non wife material Please cite where I said or implied this. I don't care what you've heard of, it's common for men in high-earning technical professions to struggle in this department.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 05:18 AM
1

None of this is lost on me. I worked to change it in a zillion ways, but there's a limit to how much you can improve when you're trying to change fundamental aspects of your personality. Luckily I found a girl who's a very good personality match, but if that didn't work out, I don't feel like I have any method to replicate the success. That would not be a fun situation. I know this problem doesn't hit every guy, or maybe even the majority of guys, but you can't deny that it's still a major epide…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 05:13 AM
2

Geez, yes I'm well aware I could relocate to the Philippines and be highly sought after as husband material, but can you maybe think of some reasons why I'd be reluctant to do that? And no, if we define rich as top 10% (which is really more like upper middle class), "rich" men do not keep a young/pretty girl on their arm. That's just demonstrably false.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 04:57 AM
0

They don't, they work out for normal people just fine all the time. A few comments ago you said: No, I think most people who have this problem don't socialize enough and have small circles, and think OLD is a representation of real life. It's not, it's hot garbage full of people you wouldn't want to date anyway. Which is it? Also, this whole discussion about having a robust social life is you having moved the goalposts from your initial comment, which was: Ah yes, the proverbial incel - highly d…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 04:52 AM
1

I don't want people to magically know about my existence, I want things like OLD, bars, singles events, etc. to not suck so bad. When I was single, I tried like hell to be social, but it's just not my strongsuit and didn't produce leads. And I think you misunderstood. The problem with OLD isn't that girls are looking for something other than LTR, it's that they expect to date 3 points above their own value, and their messages sound like they took 0.00002 seconds to just give you some response to…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 04:29 AM
0

I hear that and I agree, but at the same time, it's a real problem that there's no decent route for the introvert. If you're not that guy who's super social and has a massive network that produces steady leads, you're not that guy, and good luck trying to become him. I'm all for changing yourself for the better, but this particular thing is just too big of an ask for someone who's naturally the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 04:10 AM
2

OLD is chock full of your male equivalents (people who feel awkward and have difficulty making friends), and the gender ratios on there are vastly in your favor, so you will have no shortage of men enthusiastic to talk to you, that I can guarantee.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 04:01 AM
3

I'm comfortably in the top 10% of both physique and financial success, and finding a decent, relationship-worthy girl has always been ludicrously, and I mean ludicrously difficult. Fat, ugly women were probably always an option, but that would make me completely miserable. So yeah, if you think only fat and lazy basement dwellers have this issue, you're vastly underestimating the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 03:52 AM
-1

You're not too late to be considered in your prime, but you're dangerously close, so if you want a relationship with the best man you're capable of getting, start looking right now. I don't think identifying red flags and abusive tendencies is a skill that you develop with practice; it's pretty much just common sense. People who fall victim tend to overlook the obvious due to overwhelming emotion. If something seems kinda off but you're not sure, talk about it with some trusted friends or family…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 03:33 AM
2

Nothing is stopping you from getting a prostitute The law? Money? The fact that it doesn't do anything to quell loneliness or lovelessness and is just a temporary band aid for sexlessness? or paying for a girlfriend experience Do you seriously think that's anything remotely close to a decent substitute? Nothing is stopping you from dating less than desirable women either (single mothers, fat, ugly women, etc) There are some men who are unable to land those, and for those that can, I think most f…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 03:17 AM
2

Dude, the whole trope of "watch what women do, not what they say" is good for getting past the "I just want a guy who's nice" BS you hear from women IRL, but the comment you dismissed reads like genuine introspection and actually does line up with what women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 03:06 AM
2

Thanks for sharing, I hadn't heard these stories and never knew this was such a thing. Those men having their brains warped by porn is one viable explanation for such behavior, but it's not the only one. A lot of men pursue sex with women they're not really attracted to, maybe to validate themselves or out of sheer desperation. I'm not sure which would be the most prevalent reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 01:34 AM
1

We live in by far the most prosperous time in human history. If depression for economic reasons "is already here," then it was always here, and I seriously doubt that. Don't have a precise definition in mind, but order of magnitude wise, I think we're talking well into the tens of millions, with many more settling into unhappy relationships out of desperation. This is just wrong. Sexlessness and singledom among young men are rising parabolically, and even a brief stint on a dating app paints a v…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 01:21 AM
3

This is interesting. What exactly does "being treated like an inferior product in the bedroom" entail?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 01:03 AM
4

Make an online dating profile of a guy who's realistically a 6. Swipe right on women who are realistically a 6. Watch what happens. Alternatively, watch a guy you know (who's not exceptionally charming) approach his looksmatches at a bar.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/22 12:57 AM
19

Except there’s no actual trend of men shunning their looksmatches en masse. Theorizing is useless when the real world data is so clear.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 09:23 PM
10

My concern has nothing to do with humans surviving. The bar should be set much higher than merely surviving in a state of depression and misery.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 09:03 PM
3

I think we’re all aware that being homeless is a greater tragedy than being lonely, loveless and sexless. But you also have to keep in mind that the number of people who will struggle with loneliness/lovelessness/sexlessness dwarfs the number of people who will struggle with homelessness by orders of magnitude. They’re both significant issues in their own right.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 07:03 PM
4

Never said it doesn’t. But as far as modern first world problems go, it’s very significant and receives way too little attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 06:58 PM
5

Are you not worried about the vast depression and misery that would result from a large swath of men being shut out of romantic relationships? Or do you deny that the issue exists to begin with?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 05:50 PM
2

If you get offers from good catches for committed relationships, why do you need a dating strategy? And, I'm not going to assume you in particular are bitter, but the sub as a whole has wayyyyyy too much bitterness and resentment pent up toward men for me to believe the women who actively post there are getting what they want from men.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 07:37 AM
2

Solid comment, this is a good nuance to consider.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 05:55 AM
0

You're absolutely correct. No one, including people who are toxic in every possible way, has to change their personality. But the fact is, nobody is perfect, every single person starts out with some toxic aspects to their personality, and would attract better people into their lives by working on fixing them.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 05:43 AM
4

That's totally reasonable, and again, I'm sorry if you had to learn that lesson the hard way.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 05:32 AM
1

I don't know why it has to be one or the other when there are clear benefits in both ways. It's like asking 'do you earn money to buy food or to buy clothing?'
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 05:26 AM
5

Congrats on that. You don't remotely fall under what I had in mind as "wanting better dating results," although I'm sorry to hear you had some bad experiences along the way. Vetting men you go on dates with definitely has its place. This post was inspired by women in another thread insisting (with an army of upvoters) that vetting is the only worthwhile aspect of dating strategy for women, and that women shouldn't work to increase their romantic value to men because women are already inherently …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 05:15 AM
4

This is an interesting perspective. Did you ultimately have any problem landing relationships with good men who treated you well?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 04:50 AM
3

Being prone to fits of irrational anger is a personality trait, and working to be better in that regard is changing a part of your personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 04:00 AM
4

Bars, sure, I have friends who met their wife in a bar. But it's always when they were in their early twenties. If you're in your thirties, that's not such a great option. Agreed that there are many apps better than Tinder, and Hinge is one of them. Just a note on ratios though- they always look less bad than they actually are because the ratios for middle-aged people aren't nearly as severe. If you looked at Hinge only for below 35's, it would be way worse than 60-40.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:58 AM
4

The point you're missing is that normal people, or maybe all people, have personality traits that are harmful in some capacity. There is no such thing as "an average, normal, non-harmful personality."
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:47 AM
2

Haha, I'd love to, but I wonder sometimes how common their strain of thinking is.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:44 AM
3

Those are examples of changing your personality. So do you agree now that normal people should try to change their personalities?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:42 AM
6

I agree the math of OLD doesn't work so well for guys, but I've still yet to see sufficient evidence that cold approaching is a more effective strategy. For all of its difficulties, online at least has some success stories; it's the top way couples meet now.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:40 AM
1

FDS might legit say yes to that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:32 AM
6

The average person would be significantly better off being less angry, more friendly, more interesting and engaging, more confident, more empathetic... the list could go on for miles.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:29 AM
12

No, I haven't been on long. So I also cringe when I see guys thinking they'll get accused of harassment for talking to a woman... cause they don't actually think that, it's just a rationalization for not doing something they don't want to do. With that said, cold approaching strange women is undeniably awkward and difficult to attain any benefit from. I don't see too many guys who do it saying it's any more fruitful than OLD.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:25 AM
14

The average person has many legitimate issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 03:05 AM
7

I doubt that's even true but regardless, this isn't about "guys here."
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:59 AM
7

I disagree. There are aspects of personality that should be changed if they're causing problems. Should someone with anger issues work to be calmer? Should someone who's too shy to network and make friends work to overcome that? Should someone who comes off cold and mean work to be warmer and friendlier?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:57 AM
1

Okay, so I agree the phenomenon of men using women for sex does occur. The term "pickmeisha" just sounds like a way to say "slut" without saying "slut." What FDS misses is that this option is not available to most men, and almost always requires the man to be way out of the "pickmeisha's" league. They also miss that many men don't choose that lifestyle, they use it as an inferior substitute for the quality girlfriend they struggle to attain. This is where your analogy fails. You say the pharmaci…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:51 AM
6

more appealing to the sorts of men they want. Nobody is saying you should become submissive if you'd be miserable in that role with a dominant man.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:33 AM
3

The question is about women who want better dating results. That is, by definition, incentive to change.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:14 AM
2

There is no disconnect, you misinterpreted. I just edited that part of the OP for more clarity.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:12 AM
28

I can see how you'd sense an unpleasant personality from their comments, but how would you know whether they ever approach women?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:06 AM
6

Anyone can advise anyone what they should do, and you're on a forum for discussing these sorts of things. What value does this comment add?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 02:03 AM
75

Plenty of men feel ugly and doomed to be alone before finding these types of internet forums, and that's what leads them here. You've reversed the cause and effect. Furthermore, I seriously doubt guys are forgoing social opportunities to spend time on here. This sort of thing can be productive for people in moderate doses, to understand the issues they're facing and not feel so alone in facing them. Useful self-improvement tips can also be found online. I'd agree it can get counterproductive whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 01:55 AM
1

It has taken me anywhere from several months to several years. I see myself as a case study in which traits are overrated and underrated around these parts of the web. Tangibly, I have all the goods. I basically have the "Chad" physique (tall, athletic, toned) with a probably above average face (not sure if my genetics are above average in that department, but being so much leaner than most guys makes a huge difference). I make a lot of money and have a lot saved up. I groom and dress neatly and…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/22 09:17 PM
1

Show you where? The thesis of your whole comment was that men have the power to extract uneven benefit from desperate “pickmeishas.” I’ll say it once more: that does NOT describe anything remotely resembling a woman’s market. FDS is a totally self-selected sample. When a mixed group of women is asked about their experience and they all say they have no problem, that’s much more telling.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/22 04:10 PM
1

You're being self-contradictory. Two comments ago, you said: Same, it's a woman's market. It's the men who need to be able to flex and change to get prospects, not the woman. Women will always have options And now in this latest post, you describe a market full of desperate women and a power balance incredibly tilted in men's favor. That is not a "woman's market." It's also a ludicrously inaccurate depiction of a [reasonable] woman's dating experience, as evidenced by this thread where the femal…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/22 05:18 AM
0

And how is that?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/22 04:59 AM
-1

An imbalance in who perpetrates mistreatment in the testimony you find on Reddit is weak evidence for an imbalance on the whole. Even if there is such an imbalance, that doesn’t change the fact that women struggling with the quality of men they attract would benefit from improving their own quality.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/22 06:46 AM
5

Don’t know how to link via the app, but it’s titled ‘FDS couldn’t exist in a healthy dating market.’ Of course if you’ve had consistent dating success just being you, you wouldn’t find any need to improve yourself for dating purposes. But women on FDS are very obviously not satisfied with the quality of the men they attract. Suggesting that they’d attract men who have more to offer by having more to offer themselves felt like explaining quantum physics to a 6 year old throughout that thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/22 06:10 AM
0

It would appear that you’re completely making shit up I never remotely said or implied.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/22 05:42 AM
2

This comment would go nicely in the other thread, where FDS women are insisting that the pool of available men is inherently a minefield of users/time wasters who won’t commit, and improving their own value would be of no help in locking down a good man.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/22 01:19 AM
1

They don’t want a fat slob telling them what to do? Fine. I’m the tall, very fit, financially well-off, responsible, honest, monogamous man they all say they want. I only give my time and effort to slender women in their 20’s who are intelligent and kind, and don’t have an ounce of ‘queen sass’ in their personality. Pretty sure I’m not alone in that regard.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 10:33 PM
1

Let's try this another way. You said it's a woman's market. Let's assume that's true. In a woman's market, shouldn't a high value woman have no problem landing commitment from a high value man? (If not, then idk what a "woman's market" would be.) Meaning women who go online and complain about the lack of high value men in their lives are probably not high value women?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 06:00 PM
-2

I don't have the time or will to respond to all of this, as you consistently misconstrue what I wrote and go into rant mode. I'll just leave a couple of quotes here that are great encapsulations of FDS supporters' utter lack of accountability: I thought men were supposed to court woman not women to entice men? ... They do self reflect on what kind of men they attract and that leads them to raise their standards (emphasis mine) If you still don't see it, then I don't know what else to tell you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:47 PM
0

(and keep it high) The issue is utter lack of attention to this, which is the most crucial part.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:28 PM
2

Your analogy rests on the premise that FDS women have lots of objective value and totally reasonable expectations, which... doesn't seem to be the case, to put it mildly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:18 PM
1

If you want that precise of a definition: How to increase the probability of any given woman that I'm attracted to also being attracted to me. There's no way to spark the attraction of every woman on the planet, but there are certainly ways to accomplish the goal I just stated.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:02 PM
3

You're not the first person here to express this "women good, men bad" bigotry. Have you considered that the problem may not be a lack of high value men, but rather, that high value men avoid you and instead give themselves to women who have better attitudes and more to offer?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 04:34 PM
–

They have some overlapping difficulties, sure. But the key difference is desirable women can easily entice commitment from desirable men; undesirable women cannot. It's not rocket science.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 07:46 AM
–

No, that is not remotely what I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 07:44 AM
0

So what if it exists? I haven't ever stated it or endorsed it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 07:21 AM
–

Do you think a woman who's a fat, unpleasant slob has desirable men angling for a chance at a relationship with her, and all she needs to do is vet out the lousy ones in order to find her happily ever after?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 06:21 AM
–

I said nothing about peacocking around. I said having the value needed to entice a quality man to commit.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 06:12 AM
–

This may sound harsh, but your own opinion on that is not what matters. It's just an empty platitude. If you want a relationship, your task is to convince someone else (whom you deem worthy) that you're also worthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:53 AM
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FDS contains no tips to attract anyone. The only legit tips are for vetting, which is useless without having the value needed to attract the type of man who would pass all of your vetting.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:46 AM
–

What says a high value, committed man wants them?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 04:12 AM
–

I don't use loaded words like "fault." Just saying that if you're having trouble finding any man to commit, you'd help yourself by having more to offer to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 02:35 AM
–

It sounds like you're blinding yourself to the toxicity in FDS. I've seen lots of threads that use "man does [bad thing]" as a springboard to bash men in general. And the reality is, if you're less than your ideal man would want, then you'll be forced to settle for less than you want (or remain alone). Any talk of 'I can just be me' coupled with 'I can have anything I want' is pure delusion.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 02:25 AM
–

This is a really interesting thought. I'm not sure if it's accurate though. Like when I hear women talk about the men who pursue them, it doesn't sound like there are a lot that they deem superficially okay. It sounds like they're repulsed right off the bat by all but a tiny percentage.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 02:17 AM
–

And what if this strategy of just living your lifestyle doesn't produce the result you want? Should something change?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 02:12 AM
–

This is the best summation of FDS I've seen.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 12:44 AM
–

That's a real straw man. Obviously, I don't take issue with criticizing a surgeon who branded his patients' organs. I do take issue with how every individual man's misdeed is used as a springboard to making nasty generalizations about men in FDS land. I also take issue with how FDS criticizes men for innocuous acts, like proposing a cheap/casual first date.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 12:37 AM
–

Women already know how to be great partners and bring value, but watch out for all those lazy scumbag low value men. lol, do you really not see the bigotry and delusion there? If you were already such great partners that brought so much value to a man, you'd have wonderful men lining up to be with you left and right. The fact that you struggle with dating enough to turn to the internet for advice is evidence enough that you severely lack value somewhere. And that's totally fine if you're humble …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 12:26 AM
–

My OP was very clear about why I dislike FDS, so I don't get why you'd ignore that reason, then comment that you don't understand why so many men dislike FDS. Aside from the reason my OP gave, there are others that should be blatantly obvious, like the seething contempt for men (oops I mean 'scrotes'), and the desire to 'roast' them.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 12:04 AM
–

You missed a key word- I said a *quality* man, and you responded as though I'd said 'men.' In principle, I mostly agree with what you wrote though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:42 PM
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Who said anything about taking you on a date to ask you what you bring to the table? Why are you making nasty personal assumptions? Do you really think you'd get frostbite en route to the coffee shop?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:39 PM
–

The value to a woman is having a man with his shit together that she's attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:31 PM
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If it was one individual then sure, but we're talking about a group of thousands of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:27 PM
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Not sure exactly what you mean by this, could you elaborate?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:23 PM
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Build an attractive body, have attractive style, have an attractive bank account, have an attractive vibe, have attractive personality traits, find single women, start conversations with them and take the lead role in the mating dance
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:15 PM
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Male dating subs/forums/advice always revolve around making yourself into what women want; not necessarily what women say they want, but what they show they want through their selection. All of your specific examples are irrelevant to how to spark a woman's attraction in the first place, which is what men tend to struggle with, so no, men don't often discuss those things. If those things helped men get laid, rest assured, men would be analyzing them ad nauseum.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:09 PM
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Do women need tips to sexually attract some living, breathing men? No. Do women need tips to attract serious commitment from the type of man they'd want it from? Absolutely.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 11:01 PM
–

I don't think many people have that misconception. It's pretty obvious that FDS women struggle at dating. And in their twisted minds, all of their struggles are a male shortcoming. Used for casual sex? Those men suck, not a word about offering value that would make a man want you for more than sex. Forever girlfriend who never received a marriage proposal? That man sucks, not a word about offering value that would make him want to marry you. Hopefully you see the problem. The post you link also …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 10:56 PM
9

Friendly word of advice for the future: There is no better way to prime people to dismiss your argument than titling it "The TRUTH."
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 06:58 PM
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Eat healthy, drop fat, lift weights, get an attractive haircut, groom yourself neatly, and wear well-fitting clothes that convey your style. Those won't solve all of your problems, but they help to a significant degree, and are much more attainable than changing your personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/22 06:52 PM
39

The fate of any individual like this is extremely volatile, because it all hinges on landing that one girl that liberates you from the market. An average man does not have options. He can't attract women on demand. He's utterly powerless in the dating market. This we know. But he's still capable of being in the right place at the right time once in a blue moon. Our average man might hit it off with a decent girl sophomore year of college, end up marrying her, never know the horrors of dating, an…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 07:49 PM
1

I pretty much agree with this, but your overall appearance (again, mostly driven by your face) needs to be utterly *exceptional* to be gifted sex without having to show something personality wise. Not top 20% (lmao), not top 10%, probably not even top 5% would cut it. And yeah partly I was arguing face is more important than height and muscles, but also *much* more important than wealth. I think wealth is by far the most overrated quality when it comes to attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:57 AM
2

Go on a dating app, pose as an average looking guy who shows no sign of being a pedo weirdo incel with anger issues, and report back.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:49 AM
1

I included face in my list, which is mainly what women swipe on.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:46 AM
1

Do you not have family, friends or coworkers?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:46 AM
1

I do have issues with uncomfortable body language and lack of confidence around unfamiliar people, hence why dating was a slog for me despite being an actual 666 (6 foot, 6 pack, 6 figure) guy with a decent face. That's exactly the point of my post; the 666 qualities don't trump the intangibles.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:44 AM
1

Nothing in my description pertains to high character.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:37 AM
1

I never said it was easy to develop an attractive personality. If you're not a natural, it's way harder than getting ripped or building a decent career. Just pointing out that some guys are in fact naturals.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 03:36 AM
4

Women who complain about lack of educated men fall into the category of having ridiculous standards. It's understandable to want someone of equivalent intelligence, but if you're out there swiping left on everyone with merely a bachelor's cause you have some advanced degree, then your criteria are idiotic and you deserve to fail. There's way more to intelligence (and earning potential, if that's a concern) than how many years someone spent in school. Imagine having a masters in social work and t…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 12:19 AM
5

It's also worth noting how this effect can severely magnify small differences between the sexes. Just to oversimplify for the sake of argument, let's say 90% of men and 70% of women are motivated to find a relationship, and realistic about their expectations. And let's say that by their late twenties, 60% of people, all coming from this category, are taken and off the market. We're then left with 3/4 of single men and 1/4 of single women who fall into the "motivated and realistic" category, and …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 11:55 PM
1

Fair enough, just saying, I can't remember ever witnessing a woman go nuts for a hot strange man before he had time to work in some charm.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 04:50 AM
2

I don't know if you're talking about an extreme, like a 6'4 bodybuilder, but I can tell you, as someone who's everyday tall and muscular, it doesn't have that effect. Fun fact, a girl once told me "it took me a few months to notice you're really good-looking." They don't perceive these things instantaneously like we do.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 04:42 AM
4

Weights- A zillion health benefits, plus it does make you more attractive even if I just argued that effect is more limited than many people think. Career- I don't see how that isn't self-explanatory, unless you're some off-the-grid type.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 02:42 AM
1

I don't disagree with that, but I also don't see how it refutes my point. As in, I'd argue a woman would find a guy "abnormally hot" more due to his face, mannerisms, and vibe than his height, muscles, and (especially) bank account.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 02:36 AM
0

Like just about everything, I think those traits are a mix of innate and learned. If human minds were blank slates, and those traits only developed through positive interactions with women made possible by looking hot, then that wouldn't explain the existence of unattractive dudes who ooze these qualities and do pretty well getting laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 02:32 AM
5

I don't quite understand the first part of your comment. To second part, no, these traits do not at all describe what women say they want. Women tend to moralize their taste in men, i.e., make it sound as though their only turnoffs are things society frowns upon, like being mean or lacking hygiene. Some of the traits I listed in particular are things you never hear women admit to liking (wisecracks over serious convo, popularity).
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 02:20 AM
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Companionship Way better for raising children, if desired Also consider that the alternative for 99% of men isn't a lifetime of banging hotties between the ages of 18-30. This becomes less and less feasible as a man gets older. If your middle and old age isn't going to involve affection and sex from young, hot women anyway, then you're not giving that up by having a long-term relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 01:10 AM
9

This is a ridiculously true observation. Women, and even older men too, can't wrap their heads around a guy who has his shit together struggling to spark any initial interest from a woman. Their suggestions and speculations always take initial interest for granted, and assume you actively screw it up by being an asshole and/or bumbling idiot somewhere along the way, dashing the poor girl's hopes. When I hear this kind of thinking from older men, it highlights just how different of a dating world…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 12:59 AM
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The problems people write about on here are very real. Of course there is a lot of dumb shit theorized here, but it would be a lot more productive to call it out case-by-case than to make a separate post about how dumb everything is.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/22 07:55 AM
–

Nothing is more pointless than a rant full of generic, nebulous criticism with nothing of substance to rebut.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/22 07:42 AM
3

Related question: Has anyone here ever experimented with posing as both a gay man and a straight man on dating apps, to compare the response?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/22 05:33 PM
3

It means dating someone less desirable to the opposite sex than you are to the opposite sex. It's based on the combination of all characteristics that matter in that regard, not any particular one.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/22 07:45 AM
4

On a one-off basis, sure, that can happen. My OP was geared to women who struggle systemically with being used for sex, to the point where they complain how difficult it is to get commitment from a decent man. Edit: Also, I used words like "looksmatch" as shorthand, but in reality, I do acknowledge that other factors (like confidence, as you mention) are also important to someone's overall desirability.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 05:47 AM
1

Yeah, that would be a mostly accurate way of putting it, but it encompasses more than just looks, which is really hard to convey without being way too wordy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 03:47 AM
2

Have you considered that all that success and status might create pure, burning desire?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 03:45 AM
1

I recognize my misuse of "value," but the closest word to the meaning I was going for is "percentile," which unfortunately most people wouldn't understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 03:33 AM
3

Alpha/beta is oversimplification. Astrology is complete and utter nonsense. There's a difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 03:24 AM
5

That was not my recommendation. My recommendation was, if you're not okay with being used for casual sex, then don't have casual sex. This would have the result of pairing average women with average men, while removing the men's ability to fuck around.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 01:10 AM
6

But don't sit here and tell me (as OP is attempting to do), that if men had their choice of women, they would select the homely brown haired girl to marry instead of fucking around. That is not my argument at all. There's no hypothetical "if men had their choice of women." In the real world that we live in, where men's choices are severely limited, men tend to stick with a looksmatched girl that's into them.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 01:05 AM
8

Some people are very shortsighted; quick gratification or nothing. I'm sorry you went through that.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 12:55 AM
6

This is very interesting. Were you willing to have sex as soon as the relationship became exclusive/"official"?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 12:34 AM
2

FYI I acknowledge value/league is based on more than looks, and used "looksmatch" just as shorthand.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 12:31 AM
5

Manhattan is probably the place in the US with the highest F:M ratio, so it's not at all representative. Even with that, it's still heavily skewed toward having more men on dating apps (just to a lesser extreme than most places). Nothing in that article addresses whether or not those "Golden Penis Syndrome" men are dating down in terms of looks, so it doesn't really provide evidence that those men would keep pumping and dumping looksmatches.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 12:28 AM
2

When I say "active," that means logged on recently, not has a profile up and running. Maybe that's where the misunderstanding is.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 08:33 PM
2

This is a 180 from your initial point about inactive male profiles.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 08:11 PM
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Yeah, I hear that complaint a lot from women. Lots of men naturally ramble (I don't), so maybe women don't ask a lot of questions because they're accustomed to sitting back and listening to the guy's ramble. Did you like the fact that they talked about themselves a lot, or would you rather if they didn't? And I don't like to say anything too specific about me on here, to protect anonymity. But no, I'm not in some mega genius field, haha.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 07:50 PM
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Not really. They would ask me the handful of surface-level questions that feel obligatory, but not dig any deeper or show any sign of actual interest. The bulk of the convo would usually be me digger deeper into their interests/experiences/hobbies.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 07:35 PM
5

The long version is here: https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/rutkbi/online_dating_experience_as_a_man_with_high_value/ The short version is that I meet every typical requirement, but still was treated like dog shit and had to grind tons and tons of hours to get anything out of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 07:10 PM
3

Verified false. I've done searches of only people active recently, and the ratios come out just as lopsided.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:57 PM
1

Verified false. I've done searches of only people active recently, and the ratios come out just as lopsided.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:54 PM
17

This. Every woman I've met from OLD that was worth meeting said she was very new to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:46 PM
4

No, I'm not a woman. I'm sure that stuff feels draining when you have no frame of reference, but if you saw what OLD is like from a man's perspective, I promise you would be grateful at how little you have to put up with. Being on the wrong side of a 3:1 ratio does not make things easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:35 PM
10

Those women care way too much about what some online douche says to them. OLD is a goldmine for women willing to ignore that nonsense and hone in on what they actually want, which frankly isn't a difficult task.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:24 PM
9

No. We can't change other people's behavior. Most men AND women who use online dating act shitty and drag down the experience for everyone else. None of us can change that. What you can do, as a woman, is realize that there are far more men than women using these apps in a genuine/serious way, and therefore you can undoubtedly find what you're looking for if you just take some time to weed through the riff raff. Don't come in expecting it to take zero effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:18 PM
2

Calling BS on this one. Source?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:02 PM
3

Likely true, but still an utterly insignificant percentage of men on popular dating apps, thus not an explanation for the skewed ratios.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:01 PM
9

Single women don't feel the urge to find someone like single men do. I've heard women express the sentiment, on this sub and elsewhere, that they never "wanted a man," per se, they just wanted their current bf/husband once they got to know him. So single women are often content to be passive and wait for someone to come along, whereas we know single men are powerfully motivated to take initiative to try and get their dick wet. This is the result of cultural characteristics unique to the modern w…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 05:09 PM
17

These sorts of complaints are about as self-aware as someone who says "Homeless people actually have it easier, no one goes around aggressively begging THEM for money!" You don't have to like them, but ffs be grateful you don't experience the desperation that causes them to behave that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 08:03 AM
–

No, the perception of a lot of significant details about them changed. Regardless, the OP's point still stands even if it were all about money.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 06:57 AM
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No, but from the perspective of the women in these cultures, yes. Dating is a market, just like the job market. Whatever you do for a living, I promise you'd make way less money doing it in South Sudan, without your skills suddenly changing when you cross the border.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 05:32 AM
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How do you know they only want money?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 05:20 AM
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Wrong. There are lots of reports of men who struggle in the western dating scene having an easy time getting sex and nice girlfriends overseas. I've never gone myself, but I did a little low-effort experiment changing my online dating location, and yeah, the arbitrage is absolutely real. I was floored at the enthusiastic attention I received compared to here.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 04:49 AM
1

Your mistake is thinking that OLD sucks for men because we have burden of initiating. In reality, it sucks because male users vastly outnumber female users, and the [relatively] few serious female users mostly flock to the same tiny subset of men who are way out of their league and willing to fuck down. The mathematics of this setup are godawful regardless of who initiates.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/22 12:06 AM
3

I can sum this up more concisely: If she leaves doubt, it's a no. Interested women do not throw up obstacles for you to overcome, they do not play "hard to get," they do not test to see who will chase them the hardest. I have no clue where these pop culture myths came from, but my own life experience is very conclusive on this matter. Interested women act interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/22 12:34 AM
6

There definitely is gray area when it comes to ghosting. How long after your text goes unanswered does it officially become a rejection? 3 hours? 6 hours? 1 whole day? It's so much cleaner to just read a polite rejection, and have your definitive answer right at that moment. I'd argue there's room for misinterpretation too, since text messages don't reliably go through 100% of the time. An SMS error isn't the most likely explanation, but it happens, and if a promising lead ignores your text, tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 11:44 PM
3

Most people want someone with a similar level of intelligence to their own. Being exceptionally smart is generally a great asset, but can be very limiting when it comes to dating options. I know very intelligent people of either gender with an incredibly sparse dating history because they find so few people they genuinely connect with. I can see this manifesting into the classic "mEn jUSt wAnT dUmB bImBoS!!!" type bitterness among women who are very book smart but don't grasp social nuance. And …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 11:13 PM
27

Sex and relationships are a crucial part of human existence. If they weren't, our species would've died out long before any of us could exist. Eschewing them is not a recipe for happiness. I'll grant that intimate relationships are difficult and time-consuming and nebulous, but they're more worth having than the other shit you'd be going after instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 06:09 AM
2

What do you mean by "peak?" i.e. what variable are you suggesting is highest in a man's 30's? Attractiveness to women? Overall life satisfaction?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 03:12 AM
1

Closure 100%. If I'm really interested in a girl, the period waiting to hear back from her can be very anxiety-inducing. Slowly coming to terms with the fact that she isn't texting back causes a lot more pain than just getting a prompt, straightforward answer. Ignoring someone feels rude and disrespectful.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 12:03 AM
14

The bitterness of incel type men isn't born out of a single time a woman rejected them. Rejection is all they know. They feel utterly incapable of landing any woman at all, no matter how many times they try. This is like comparing someone who flubbed their first job interview out of college to a homeless guy. It doesn't excuse their behavior, but the comparison is still ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/22 05:26 AM
3

This experiment has already been tried. It describes the whole history of strictly monogamous cultures, including the US back in your grandparents' day. Strict monogamy asks women to sacrifice their desire to date up, and men to sacrifice their desire for sexual variety, for a more stable and egalitarian social structure. Nowadays, even though you can only be legally married to one person, there's obviously a massive sexual market outside of marriage that doesn't adhere to these sacrifices. So y…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 11:59 PM
7

There is definitely some surface-level similarity between TRP and FDS, with all the bitterness and frustration pent up toward the opposite sex. But beneath that, you have one group that is dedicated to improving themselves in all the ways that make them more attractive, and another group that only makes entitled demands, paying zero attention to what they themselves can offer. I don't even need to say which is which, it's obvious. They are not the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 10:46 PM
1

Women's standards are unrealistic when they expect commitment from the sorts of out-of-their-league men who will only pump and dump them. If you're happy with your results, then sure, I guess by definition, your standards are realistic. But most women on internet dating forums are not happy with their results.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 10:37 PM
2

You're wrong. I've worked like hell on myself in all of the ways you describe, and achieved a lot of success in both fitness and career. I can honestly say the only thing I don't have going in my favor is some social discomfort/awkwardness around unfamiliar people. With all that, dating was hard as fuck for me... harder than getting a good job, harder than getting toned muscles. The modern dating market is simply wrecked, for many reasons that could be a post in itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 10:14 PM
2

I strongly disagree with this. It doesn't matter for the initial swipe, and once we match and start talking, she'll look it up if she's legitimately interested. I'm guessing you're a woman judging by your avatar, and one of the main reasons I wanted to share this story was to challenge women's assumptions. I know it's difficult to believe dating for men nowadays is this abjectly awful, but it really is. I wholeheartedly believe a good-looking doctor would struggle mightily unless he's like top 2…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 04:37 PM
1

Those sorts of articles/videos always annoy me, because they speak as though the issue applies to both men and women. Meanwhile, I found myself constantly chasing women I wasn't really attracted to because there was no one else. The difference in number of mate choices between a man and a woman of similar value is orders of magnitude.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 04:13 PM
2

No, it's something a lot of people wouldn't recognize.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 04:06 PM
0

Just curious, are 30+ men who are fit and have no sign of balding/graying more or less attractive than similarly built college guys?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/21 01:54 AM
2

The answer to this question depends on how it's interpreted. It's far more difficult for men to achieve what's considered an attractive physique. Staying lean plus building serious muscle takes way more effort than just staying reasonably lean, which is all women really need to do. It's not close. However, women are more harshly penalized in the dating market for not living up to an attractive physique. Men are judged more holistically, meaning we can make up for a lacking physique with other at…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/21 04:20 AM
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