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Twohagsover30 Archive

View 45 posts and 601 comments by Twohagsover30 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
5861

MALE DEPRAVITYTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 04:49 PM
3657

MALE DEPRAVITYTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 04:42 PM
2724

BOOK REPORTTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 03:30 PM
2547

MESSAGE FOR MALE LURKERSTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 06:13 PM
2535

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:31 PM
2379

GREEN FLAG 🟢Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 02:44 PM
2286

STAY WOKETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 03:37 PM
2008

CULTURAL MISOGYNYTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:22 AM
1865

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 04:04 PM
1569

STAY WOKETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 01:48 AM
1544

MOOD FOR LIFETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 10:28 PM
1340

FDS HUMORTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 12:34 PM
1307

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 09:52 PM
1296

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 02:56 PM
1208

STAY WOKETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 11:46 PM
1024

FDS HUMORTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 06:42 PM
974

#HeAin'tTheOne2021Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:06 AM
875

GREEN FLAG 🟢Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 12:34 PM
759

#HeAin'tTheOne2021Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 07:19 PM
687

#HeAin'tTheOne2021Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 03:50 PM
667

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 11:54 AM
634

THINGS SCROTES SAYTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 02:13 AM
600

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 11:53 AM
590

TRIGGER WARNINGTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 01:54 PM
578

#HeAin'tTheOne2021Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 04:53 PM
462

STRATEGYTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 03:03 PM
391

GLOBAL RESISTANCETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 11:45 AM
378

QUEEN SH*TTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 01:34 PM
319

TRIGGER WARNINGTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 05:48 PM
293

Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 08:48 PM
285

NICE FOR WHAT?Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 02:47 PM
246

PORN SICK, LIMP DICKTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 12:36 PM
231

PICKME CULTURETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 03:41 PM
180

MINDSET SHIFTTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 01:40 PM
92

ROAST-A-SCROTETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 12:57 PM
12

MOOD FOR LIFETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:13 PM
2

FDS HUMORTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 02:09 AM
1

DISCUSSIONTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 10:46 PM
1

REMINDER 👑Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 10:05 AM
1

ROAST-A-SCROTETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 12:56 PM
1

#HeAin'tTheOne2021Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:19 AM
1

STRATEGYTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 09:28 PM
1

MOOD FOR LIFETwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 11:09 PM
1

BOOK REPORTTwohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 07:18 PM
0

Story time ☕Twohagsover30/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 10:31 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
42

Do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 06:20 AM
52

What's the difference between someone who votes for pro-life representatives and someone who votes for pro-life representatives but says they're pro choice? I can't see it. Same outcome with more cognitive dissonance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 06:18 AM
31

They were too busy delaying comments that were less than glowing reviews about the podcast upon release under that release post. Color me unsurprised.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 06:17 AM
45

It's not rational. I'm a biochemist who was involved wth the front line basic science of most available first generation Covid vaccines. I'll insert my favorite Rick and Morty quote: 'THERES NO EXPLAINING IT, IT DEFIES ALL LOGIC'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 06:15 AM
76

I AGREE with you. What bothers me is that none of the conservative women upstream or downstream have the gall to say: 'I care about insert conservative fiscal ideal over women's rights, gay rights, trans rights, social services... ect I want them to OWN IT. SAY THAT YOU CARE LESS. I respect view that a person can articulate and is consistently supporting/not supporting. The cognitive dissonance is mind-blowing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 06:12 AM
58

I'm glad you read that confusing comment more closely. My eyeballs got crossed 1.5 sentences in. Yikes that was a cluster of confused fox-news word salad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 05:57 AM
22

Where was the change in the guest's perspective? I certainly missed that section of the podcast while intently listening through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 05:44 AM
37

Oh let me be clear. Conservative women who claim that they are PRO WOMENS RIGHTS. PRO CHOICE. PRO POLICE REFORM: and then also vote with the Republican Party are ALL TALK AND NO WALK. I've said it 100 times on this post and I'll say it again. Being pro- anything in theory and then electing public officials that directly oppose those ideals mean that you prioritize INSERT ANY OTHER PLATFORM over those stated 'pros'. It's not WRONG, but I haven't heard a single woman own up to it. Tell me: I care …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 05:41 AM
92

What the fork did I just read? 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 05:18 AM
141

'Identities as a gold star republican' 'skirts all issues' I'm glad someone listened to the same podcast that I did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 04:00 AM
92

Not just incompatible- it is their entire platform. The GOP carefully and systematically reached out to evangelicals to elect Trump. Their message was "we know Trump isn't the best candidate. But he will pack the courts and we can overturn Roe." Their literal strategy for electing conservatives is to hate on women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 03:27 AM
17

Alright. 1) Being 'in favor' of abortion and then voting to elect representatives that OPPOSE abortion down the line means you don't care enough about abortion rights to do anything about it. 2) I have no problem with "ALIENATING" women who vote agains the interests of women, people color and other disenfranchised groups under the fake guise of 'small government'. 3) I care MORE about women's basic rights than the esoteric fight against bio men in women's sports and bathrooms ect. 4) So if all s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 12:53 AM
117

Yes. The personal values I have for women's emancipation from sexual subjugation absolutely should shape government policies that effect women. And that IS a moral high ground hill that I, for one, will die on. Conservatives have JUST passed legislation that constricts our sexual (and therefore social) lives by restricting abortion access. Politics IS personal. Comparing us to evangelicals is deeply, deeply offensive. This is a dating podcast for women. Women not having access to health care for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 12:44 AM
24

👏👏👏👏👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 12:38 AM
43

Yep. I certainly have too low of a tolerance for this internalized cognitive dissonance and talking around issues to continue to listen. If what you suggest is the case, then I can't wait to hear the 'MEN TELL ALL' 'INCELS UNITE' and 'PICKMES EXPLAIN' pods.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 10:40 PM
46

So if that's the case, where is the discussion? Where is the challenge and answers to these questions? Providing another view a platform all allowing that view to SKIRT all the issues and literally say that supporting equality is a 'moral and not political' issue isn't creating discussion: it's providing a grandstand. The SYSTEMATIC inequality that women, people of color, Native Americans, Latinos, immigrants and other disenfranchised populations face is based in and propagated by the government…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 10:32 PM
114

Good question Twist. This is my whole point. Everyone has a hierarchy of priority. I would expect FEMALE Dating strategy to air on the side of supporting women and women's rights both in theory and practice. But I guess not. If all sides matter, why don't we let the men in to comment 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 10:23 PM
53

I firmly believe we listened to two VASTLY different podcasts. Having a political affiliation and speaking to ones own voting history enlightens everyone to their personal hierarchy of voting priorities. We all have one. Full stop. Now when those 'priorities' are described as being 'for the individual' and 'anti big-government' and 'pro abortion rights' that's fine. BUT is that what is being supported with those political appointees? When your elected officials primarily push agendas that are ag…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 10:10 PM
92

Confused about the post? Go listen to the podcast. Minute 14 is very enlightening.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 09:56 PM
63

Did you listen to the lot saying that voting for equality was standing on a 'moral high ground' I certainly did? Saying you are 'for' certain rights for others and then being a 'gold star republican' meaning you vote against the support of those rights for others simply means that you care less about equality than insert any other policy here Be consistent, be honest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 09:30 PM
72

Wow!! The first non-glowing comment allowed through. Thank goodness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 08:14 PM
11

Settings > Phone > Silence unknown callers Then there's no 'missed call' notification nonsense
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:55 PM
13

My favorite iPhone function is 'ignore unknown callers' Best button ever. Phone won't ring and they'll get voicemail immediately. Or in my case: no voicemail because I never set it up 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:53 PM
16

Time to practice saying 'no' Someone harassing your friends and family has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the harasser. Tell everyone 'NO' and stand your ground. They can do the same to the harasser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:52 PM
16

Oh yeah!! I learned the ban/report buttons on Etsy FAST 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:39 PM
105

Wow I didn't realize voting in favor of gender and race equality was choosing to stand on moral high ground 🙄 Honestly, do better ladies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:36 PM
137

Blocking and deleting is ESSENTIAL to cutting off contact with low value people. Trust me, If a man wants to continue contacting you, he will find and way. I had this issue with way-too-long term partner who wouldn't let it go after he dropped me. New phone numbers, showing up at my house, emails, messages from new Facebook or Instagram accounts. They crave ATTENTION, and when you deny them that, they will implode. I believe my final message to yet another new number was 'Do not contact me again…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:33 PM
55

LDRs don't work. EVERY city sucks for dating. OLD gives you a false impression that you have many options, but only because it expands your pool of NV and LV people. Men looking for women out of state want a penpal because they are married. There is no real vetting you can do prior to meeting them. Fuckboy masterminds will keep up appearances on chats for months, don't kid yourself. People that do the best in OLD are charming and charismatic, which means they also have the power to manipulate.
/r/askFDS30/09/21 12:30 PM
118

Full link: https://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/hinder-a-dating-app-for-emotionally-unavailable-men
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 06:43 PM
157

Van men and long haul hikers: always looking to stink up your shower.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 02:55 PM
94

Did making your expectations clear put pressure on him? Yes Is this a good thing? ANOTHER RESOUNDING YES Continue to save yourself time by letting people who are wishy washy/uncertain wander away. Better now than 8 years down the line. Ask me how I know 😉
/r/askFDS14/09/21 01:13 AM
46

Ugh too much drama from the lot of them. Sounds exhausting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 07:52 PM
29

Yes!!! I find there to be a 1:1 correlation between the levels of someones BS and the levels of my busyness. Hmmm wonder how that happened 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 10:01 PM
13

SNAPS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 09:48 PM
45

I prioritize my career and family over romantic relationships and usually find men that do the same. So.... general selfishness, I suppose. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 05:13 PM
75

I think this has less to do with HV/ LV and more to do with the fact that CF people in general appreciate their freedom and are less interested in marriage altogether. My CF single female friends all have the attitude on marriage like "meh, if it happens, it happens." Demographic studies back this, as only 9% of marriages are childless. Having children is a BIG motivation for both men and women to seek marriage. As for partners? Yes, absolutely. I've had fantastic relationships with several CF m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 04:56 PM
45

Further reason to get off OLD and set privacy settings on social media accounts. We can't stop the misogynists, but we can make it harder for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 04:37 PM
3

Totally agree. You're spot on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 07:55 PM
31

I agree with everything you posted here. However, I wanted to give some context as to why Bumble was considered revolutionary. Back in the day (2013?) men on Tinder could send you a dick pic in the first message and there was no reporting feature. It was ridiculous. Bumble was a total game changer by letting women control the dialogue, at least at the beginning. Things have changed alot since then, of course, and men have become more sophisticated- now waiting for women to give out their phone n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 02:42 PM
4

Or anti vaxxers that are causing hospitalizations to skyrocket? Or people who vote pro-police because they think roving bands of thugs should beat down black people on the regular? No. We do not need to talk to people who don't believe in science and literally do not care about people dying! We do NOT need to talk to people who view women and POC as subhuman. The cognitive acrobatics of "BuT nOt AlL cOnSeRvAtIvEs" that the mods in this thread are using is just as disgusting. Conservative Republi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:12 AM
61

Don't
/r/askFDS25/07/21 11:34 PM
62

Exactly. "MY gun rights/ MY money/ MY white privilege matters alot more than those other people." (Those other people often being women, children, brown/ black people, poor, disabled.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 10:37 PM
59

This. So. Much. 🙌🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 08:50 PM
92

We have seen what the amalgamation of toxic masculinity, white supremacy, and anti-science media, rhetoric, and law making has done to the US. The conservative forces in this country are literally killing people en masse. To turn a blind eye towards their hatred of black and brown people, to ignore the policing of women's body through regressive policies, to dismiss the anti-democratic insurrectionists is to be a supporter of patriarchal white supremacy. Does the left hold all the answers? No. B…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 08:45 PM
64

Well and along the same lines, engagement shouldn't be a surprise. It a co-choice that should be discussed well ahead of time. NOW, if someone wants to pick their own ring, then there should be a shopping trip together. And, as someone who would have to wear that piece of jewelry daily for a very long time, I'd want to pick it out as well! Unfortunately that's NEVER the case with the posts like the one you describe. I absolutely cringe at the social media trend of women aggressively 'dropping hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 04:17 PM
20

^ THIS is the most important comment.
/r/askFDS20/07/21 01:11 AM
9

^ ALL OF THIS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 03:27 AM
165

Also useful when a quick getaway is needed: Let your crappy date know you need to make a phone call or use the restroom, give the money for your meal to a waitress, bartender or other front of house member and let them know which table it's for. THEN tell all your girlfriends about the assclown you just extricated yourself from.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 05:19 PM
1676

This is why you always have enough cash for your portion of a meal. You don't argue with the man or waitstaff, you get out your wallet, put down the cost of your meal and LEAVE. Simple as that. No words. No drama. Just excuse yourself. Who cares if it's more difficult for him after. I've had this happen before
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 02:18 PM
54

Best to focus on an area that makes YOU happy. Statistics mean very little when they don't take into account the proportion of workaholics and/or van guys looking to borrow your shower. A location YOU love will open doors to hobbies and communities to meet friends, community and maybe a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 03:12 AM
48

AHAHAHAHAHAHAH. No. Block/delete 'lol it's a joke' -scrote insert forever silence -FDS practitioner
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 01:06 AM
14

I wouldn't even ENGAGE with someone over 300 miles away unless we had an established monogamous relationship WITH an end date to the distance. One thing to consider for established relationships that will include months (or more) of separation: How will the dynamic be when they/I am/are able to occasionally visit? I will tell you. Someone is the host and bears the burden of responsibility for the travelers happiness. To be clear: this goes for both partners. Nobody will want to make the 'visitor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 01:04 AM
8

So much this. I'm glad someone said it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 10:31 AM
5

A few dates in a year? Huh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 03:53 AM
10

Interesting! In yet another episode of America Sucks, we definitely do not have access to these types of tests. CDC Link
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 12:15 PM
12

There are currently no FDA approved tests for HPV detection in men. Are there tests available in other countries? Genuinely curious. Also, I stand with you on the anti-OLD bandwagon and I was sad to hear the latest podcast that supports its use.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 11:46 AM
1

I have a friend that's in your boat. She does activity dates: city architecture tours, vineyard tours, museum visits, rock climbing, kayaking, astronomy/ night photography, ballroom dancing, concerts, movies, etc. For first dates, she normally goes for guided events in public and then for later dates she does an activity followed by a walk to discuss whatever they did. She's HV all the way and never attracts low effort fuckboy types with this strategy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 05:54 PM
33

Flakes always be flakin'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 05:31 PM
1

Unfortunately it is. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 03:57 PM
56

Even worse: One that craves his attention and begs for it when he doesn't want her to simply to boost his fat ego
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 05:48 PM
39

For quite awhile in the past I had thought, 'wow, these people don't see how much cognitive dissonance these men hold'. But then I started media posts like the one up top and realized that THEY KNOW It's despicable
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 05:46 PM
56

100% I call them cognitive dissonance monsters 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 05:33 PM
12

There's a lot going on under the hood here, but I just wanted to note that this isn't what FDS would call a success story. A success story is finding someone who has built themselves in a way that is compatible with your lifestyle/standards, as you have to meet theirs AND you both mutually enjoy each other's company and find each other attractive enough to build a relationship. There's a lot of new members around so I felt obligated to comment. Hopefully some longer term members can help break t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 02:54 PM
63

This is NOT what FDS is about. Allowing a man back multiple times and then giving a list of changes they must make is a recipe for disaster. You say yourself that you've considered calling it off because of the same traits he has exhibited in the past. Be very careful not to waste your time. People who only change in the face of ultimatums are rarely sincere and will always come back eventually with the 'YOU TRIED TO CHANGE ME, YOU NAG ME' song and dance. You're not alone, we've all been there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 02:07 PM
104

Anyone who leaves a woman because of her breasts isn't the person for that woman. Full stop. It's time to invest in professional therapy with a concentration in body acceptance. Plastic surgery may not change the way you feel without the footwork upfront.
/r/askFDS30/06/21 01:48 AM
7

Not sure why the realists here who understand FDS tenets are being downvoted. You made your needs clear enough by suggesting dinner. He wants casual drinks. It's not a fit! There are even bigger issues associated with dating someone who lives over an hour away when you will be in their area for work. It's a bit too easy for them to take advantage of your location (both in THEIR domain and away from YOUR home). But that's my accessory comment.
/r/askFDS30/06/21 12:59 AM
1

Don't engage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 12:39 AM
1253

'I feel bad.... BUT I don't actually at all and 100% blame my girlfriend' It never ceases to amaze me the lack of self awareness people can demonstrate. So she agreed to pay for herself for the trip but he and the family didn't outline WHAT would be happening or HOW MUCH IT WOULD COST. That's gonna be a 5* YIKE review from me. Sidebar: a second job to pay for a vacation with HIS family?!? Hell no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 11:42 PM
5

Okay this this a pretty wild post. It's red flag to hate cats??! I don't want any animals that pee and poo in a box in my home and then walk around on my counters and surfaces shedding literal parasites and feces. I don't care if it's a cat, dog, snake, Komodo dragon or mother-in-law: not in my house. What IS a red flag is someone expecting their partner to give up or rehome a pet. A requirement like that needs to be laid out immediately way way WAY up front. In fact, I find men with cats to be …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 01:46 AM
83

You don't. Being platonic friends with men is like walking blindfolded through a minefield. The risks outweigh the benefits. Go find his female friends and build platonic relationships with them!
/r/askFDS22/06/21 03:52 PM
7

Reddit gives all users 'free' awards to distribute as they will every couple days. It's certainly a good tactic on Reddit's part to make people feel the need to purchase a subscription or more awards in the future, but the majority don't indicate an exchange of money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 08:40 AM
14

Most of my friends (35+) have a 'been there, done that' attitude when it comes to marriage and kids. Many of the FDS principles are designed for women looking to build a life and family for their kids, but the majority of the rules still apply. For me, I look at every interaction as: is this benefitting me, as a woman? Is it hurting other women? If the answer is yes and no, respectively, I'm doing it right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 02:09 AM
3

This. I took one of my lady friends on a 'date' all afternoon yesterday. We 'bar' hopped and ate small plates at different establishments. We met loads of great people- women, men, couples, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 10:48 PM
1

Nah. OLD won't make your town any bigger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 10:45 PM
4

Being generally friendly and inviting versus approaching and chasing a man are totally different things.
/r/askFDS20/06/21 10:38 PM
2

Omg brilliant. Power tools plus crispy octopus.
/r/askFDS20/06/21 01:04 PM
12

Nah. It's like comparing sewers. Sure, some are filled with less toxic shit than others but why go there at all?
/r/askFDS20/06/21 01:03 PM
28

I'm so glad you posted this, OP. I hope mods respond. I agree with you that seeing men behave poorly on OLD is not a great look. HVM are not sitting on a toilet to find their Queen. So why are we using these apps at all? I often post articles I see about societal trends regarding OLD. I think this is an important message for ladies new to dating who may write off those screenshot posts as being anecdotal. Even the dating over # subs have shifted to being fairly anti-OLD. They don't work for wome…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:57 PM
48

I'm using this analogy forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:45 PM
66

The HVM that you hope are on those apps are also out at restaurants with their friends, shopping in local stores, engaging in hobbies, volunteering in their community, walking their dog around the park, and participating in networking events. We do not need an app to meet them. There is absolutely no positive to joining OLD. A third of women who have used the apps have been assaulted. A third have been verbally assaulted. Half have had a man pursue them after they told a man no. Men outnumber wo…
/r/askFDS20/06/21 12:43 PM
3

I think this shift on FDS (and even Reddit in general) is partly due to the fact that OLD has gone WAY WAY downhill since the pandemic started, so we are seeing more of those posts on here. NVM no longer had access to bars and prostitutes. They came out on the apps in droves. It's a total cluster now. 5 years ago? Meh, it was more of a mixed bag. Honestly even the dating over # subs are pretty anti OLD these days. While it's mostly women who are abused on those apps, average men don't find it an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:34 PM
71

Article: Link to Guardian article She mentions how being treated poorly again and again is insidious; it deeply affects how we view ourselves and how we think we deserve to be treated. "The more it happens, the more damage." Her conclusion is that we shouldn't necessarily get off the apps. Rather, she suggests nexting men who behave terribly. This is correct to some extent- yet if men on the apps are behaving poorly, we should protect ourselves by not exposing ourselves to them in the first plac…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 11:46 AM
17

Absolutely. The crazy part is that this isn't even an FDS sentiment; being anti-OLD is pretty mainstream! There is a reason men outnumber women 9 to 1 on Tinder and 8 to 1 on Bumble. 'Regular', non-FDS women are rejecting these apps as well. Even on the Dating Over # subs, you'll find countless posts about quitting the apps. Hell, even halfway mediocre men know the apps are bad for them. The manosphere doesn't even promote OLD. It's not good for literally ANYONE but the most low value of men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 12:54 PM
15

Why is this being downvoted? One of the mods posted about why FDS is against OLD just yesterday. FDS does not support OLD in any way for a myriad of reasons. Ultimately, it is a waste of your precious time and does not maximize female benefit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 12:31 PM
156

Exactly! Ladies, invest in your community. Invest in your friends. Invest in your family. Invest in hobbies. This will lead to a fulfilling life free of loneliness. If there is a single HVM in your area, you will find him through these social networks! You do not need to go online to do this. Go out and live your life. 👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/21 11:29 PM
8

Dinner parties Non profit fundraisers Galas Art gallery events Breweries Meet-up group Trivia night at a restaurant Hardware store Golf Dog parks Coffee shops Through friends
/r/askFDS18/06/21 10:12 AM
4

I'm a rural dwelling gal and I've lived in rural communities all over the US. I'm actually working on a post for FDS that's focused on dating in the country, because some of the advice just really does not apply to us. We still have ample opportunities off OLD. Some of my favorite include: boat shows, church socials (I'm an atheist, I still go when friends invite me), hiking meet-ups, bbq parties, hardware stores, rodeos, shooting ranges, breweries/ vineyards, outdoor music venues, livestock auc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 08:01 PM
5

You can even get them to play their own hand if you use my slight change of wording from this quote. I say, "I won't mix finances with anyone who isn't family." He says, "That's so smart! I agree!" Boom. He agrees. He won't ever get into a financial arrangement with you unless you're family, so I guess he has to marry you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 07:45 PM
5

100%. I'd like to add a few more to the list: • Match with me but never message me. • Match with me but never respond to me after I initiated (Bumble). • Talk to me for a week or more without ever asking me out. • Talk to me for a week or more and tell me he intends to ask me out but he's not ready because he's planning to separate from his wife/gf but isn't there yet. • Talk to me for a week or more and tell me he intended to ask me out but he was just in my area for a weekend and doesn't live …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 07:34 PM
78

I agree with the other comment. However, there is one caveat. Living in a post industrial capitalist society which predicates survival on a 60 hour workweek with very little social safety nets can strain relationships between otherwise healthy human beings. Working late, traveling for work, being available 24/7 is so commonplace in some societies that interpersonal relationships will always suffer. If our culture values work slavery over family, then yes, it is common to feel disconnected to you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 07:12 PM
28

"Guess what babe? You will not survive." Mood for life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 07:03 PM
72

All of this^ This further solidifies why it's important for every woman to sit down and really think about her hard expectations of a partner. Once those expectations are set, don't waiver for any reason. 'Well, we have fun together' 'Well, he DID walk me to my car after I asked 4 times and explained why it was necessary ' 'He can learn to ...... [insert anything]' NO. No no no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 01:50 PM
9

The AUDACITY of these men. Jesus.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 02:18 AM
47

'Oh I need to go to work for last minute data collection' block and delete 100%
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 01:05 AM
250

Hahahahaha! This is a great litmus test! A COMMENSURATE test I use (as a not 100% tidy, but wicked clean freak) is to just look shocked at a man's place that isn't up to my personal 'snuff' and say something like: 'Oh I didn't mean to intrude in the middle of cleaning day' And then leave. Forever. 😂 I hope more women post their strategies. I need to expand my toolbox.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 12:40 AM
22

The FDS handbook covers the answer to this question exceptionally well in the Dating section!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:32 PM
26

Ugh!!! That is absolutely sickening ☹️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:15 PM
33

Oh yes. A tale as old as time!! Refusing to be a forever girlfriend DOESN'T mean not taking the time to vet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:14 PM
8

Happens all the time! I think there's a few reasons: 1) the man is wishy-washy and eventually his girlfriend wears him down. 2) family pressure 3) family planning and 'time running out' to have kids 4) insert many other excuses here (All these come from PERSONAL experience: myself and my girlfriends included)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:12 PM
90

Yep. It happens all the time. Even better: 'I'll buy the house and you pay me rent for the mortgage' 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:07 PM
49

This isn't saying all WOMEN need to get married. This is clearly saying: don't waste your time on someone who refuses to commit and continue to give them the benefits of a 'wifey' when you know what you want/need. You know what you bring to the table! Don't waste all that on someone who is wishy-washy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:06 PM
95

Oh ABSOLUTELY!!! ^ all this 100% The obvious LVM should be disqualified immediately. I find that some people get caught up on the 'potential HVM' who has decided to vet their girlfriend for years and demand more and and and more commitment from her with nothing in return but dependency on him. A man who is making you a forever girlfriend for ANY reason is a LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 06:26 PM
4

That's absolutely devastating!!! I hope you have some steadfast supports to lean on. Much love sent your way. Losing a family member is so painful ☹️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 01:52 AM
8

Need to vent?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 01:18 AM
17

Ps: I also date people outside of my network to 'steal' their single lady friends. I don't condone doing this, but it can be effective 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 08:14 PM
44

Absolutely!! I completely agree. Did I get dropped from my network of friendships when a relationship with my long term partner ended because I became the 'single lady'? YES. Have I cultivated relationships with ostensibly single women all over the country? ALSO YES!! It's about finding hobbies and/or business where a network of women can support each-other. Now I'm not saying this is easy, but it's absolutely worth the effort!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 08:10 PM
69

Other female friendships. Full stop. My girlfriends would move mountains for me and I'd do the same for them. Being "single" doesn't mean that you'll be without a community. Ever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 08:02 PM
6

Here's the thing. Regardless of the person and type of relationship, if that person isn't bringing value to your life and is actively causing you distress/anger/anxiety, it's time to take a step back.
/r/askFDS13/06/21 07:59 PM
32

@phoenix_rising2018 is COMPLETELY correct. Sharing your expectations even with trusted friends/family usually doesn't conclude with those people being supportive or accepting. AND THATS OKAY! Not all information is for everyone, and you'll learn with time who you can confide in who has similar ideals and standards. Do not re-engage and try to change their minds. They will drag you down to their level and beat you at their own game.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 07:39 PM
8

The real queen move right here 👆🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 03:22 PM
25

Excellent analysis. 100%
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 05:14 PM
128

TL;DR OLD makes people a product and commodity. OLD necessitates marketing and 'selling' one's self Swiping necessitates game strategy to maximize benefit Ghosting is commonplace because it's easy and minimizes personal guilt
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 01:51 PM
2

Is this someone you've already met or are you using OLD?
/r/askFDS11/06/21 04:12 PM
69

YESSSS FINALLY!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 03:58 PM
7

You're great at relationship advice* FIFY ✊🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:04 PM
3

I wish I knew. I saw it floating on a feminist site and thought I'd share it here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:03 PM
2

🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:02 PM
1

Eurovision passed them for the season finale! There is hope 🙌🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 06:43 PM
98

Ugh. That show was disgusting. How did they get away with attempting to normalize a pedophilic/hugely unequal power dynamic relationship?! I had always assumed it was male writers/producers, but no. There were many women executives. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 04:07 PM
38

Totally. I agree it's bullshit. What I'm happy about is the fact that she even feels the need to virtue signal in the first place. That means that public opinion is changing, albeit slowly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 01:45 PM
80

I blame Dailymail (terrible gossip rag) and Pickmeishism. It's a real disease comprised of internalized misogyny and capitalism. It is hard to tell whether she really wants her husband to quit or whether it is merely virtue signaling. Nonetheless, it does demonstrate that the anti-porn movement is gaining traction if people at the top are trying to separate themselves from the industry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 12:55 PM
305

She didn't mind exploiting other women while she was jetsetting around the world. Only now when lawsuits have plagued the company and governments across the world are investigating Pornhub for not verifying users suddenly she cares. 🙄 Nonetheless, if she and other Pickme wives take a public stand against the porn industry, perhaps there will be some changes in the right direction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 12:42 PM
4

Block him via all contact methods. If he's blocked then he can't contact you easily. See a message from a random number/email? Block it. Do not open it. Do not give him any more of your time.
/r/askFDS10/06/21 12:40 AM
154

Dickpic scrotes are predators; they aren't interested in dating us. Rather, they are interested in objectifying, abusing, dehumanizing, and assaulting us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 09:54 PM
24

Oh you forgot that the MAJOR difference is that women have no perceived value. It's absolutely sickening!! Your comment needs to be at the top of this thread
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 07:36 PM
6

Why not both 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 07:15 PM
12

Yes!!!! I REMEMBER this exact thing happening 'Be more ladylike' I believe was the directive 🙄. It was mindblowing to me even as a child that the girls weren't allowed to wear slacks and shorts like the boys. I think my mom just got me bike shorts for under the skirts and jumpers. She knew I was 'out of control' /s and was tired of the calls home.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 07:15 PM
120

Oh you know how knees really make boys go ABSOLUTELY BAZONKERS AND THERES NO OTHER WAY TO STOP IT THAN TO COVER THEM UP. 😂 I empathize. I spent Many MANY years in catholic school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 04:45 PM
7

Keep on reporting us, scrotes!!! I'm sorry the truth hurts you so much that you believe it's hate speech. Oh wait.... I'm actually not sorry at all. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 03:53 PM
11

Can we save her? Going forward she may benefit from the level up sub the mods here created.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 03:41 PM
13

We were banned for a comment about women who join the sex trade due to economic desperation and trauma. 🙄 That sub is just another misogynistic corner of the manosphere. You summed it up correctly. Also, fuck those guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 03:40 PM
220

Posts in that sub like this one are heartbreaking. Abused and battered women usually understand the situation they're in but feel completely stuck because of children and/or some bastardization of Stockholm syndrome. 'I would never do that to someone I love' Exactly, sister. She gets it. ☹️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 12:20 PM
3

Oh yes and be sure to add: 'Listened to everything I wanted/needed, but didn't realize that I don't even know what I want and would continue to be a petulant man-child no matter what' 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 11:22 PM
43

YES! Haven't we all seen that and/or experienced it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 10:20 PM
229

And a personality disorder
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 10:19 PM
140

Good lord. The MAN-CHILD revels in taking his own lack of self control out on HIS children. These short horror stories make my stomach churn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 10:17 PM
62

I disagree with 1) separating men into alpha/beta designations 2) suggesting that sex is a transactional commodity
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 07:40 PM
110

calls the local knacker to see how many buckets of fresh blood can be purchased after she finishes packing Just some light redecorating seems to be in order
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 07:00 PM
19

Oh it was, and you better believe I forwarded it to a few select women and we all had a ROARING laugh. Oh yes, and it was a numbered list 😂😂.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 06:52 PM
183

Exactly! 'Yeah, on second thought his love of crocheting really negates the whole rapeyness problem' NOT 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 06:06 PM
46

Pre FDS, during a 6+ year relationship he told me that he hated me over dinner. I kicked him out of my apartment and immediately blocked/deleted his contact information. He sends an email listing all the things I did over that 6+ years that made him angry, and then CLOSES the email by asking for me back. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NO. Cue him getting multiple new phone numbers to harass me. It's still gonna be a no from me, dog.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 06:02 PM
121

Yes! 'You owe me one' 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 05:31 PM
436

YES!!! This. My favorite: 'boyfriend' has a creepy openly misogynistic frat-bro friend. Lady says she doesn't want to go to events where creepy frat-bro is. 'Boyfriend' responds, "well you haven't even tried to get to know him" Yeah, I think hearing him brag about sleeping with extremely drunk young women is all she needed to know. That man is a rapist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 05:31 PM
11

Other commenters really addressed the health issues here. Just wanted to add you could ask your lady friends for help during recovery. Good friends will step up for a few days.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 02:53 PM
36

We should not be supporting these companies at all. They are anti-women. For the women that say "but I'd never meet (LV) men otherwise!" I have some thoughts for you: If you don't have time to go out and meet people, you should ask yourself if you really have time to date at all. If you don't get approached by men in your area, guess what? All those lazy scrotes are also using OLD. OLD attracts LOWEST effort people, not the men who have the gumption to talk to a woman in the wild. If you go out …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 02:32 PM
16

I've met the same scrotes you describe at trivia nights as well. I'm not even sure you're depicting gamer dudes but rather the under 40 generation as a whole. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 01:50 AM
603

lf you follow a random women around with cameras on the street to "get a reaction," you deserve to get screamed at, YouTube Wannbe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 11:10 PM
3

When you can't tell a butt from a gut 🙄 Maybe it's time to start asking men when they're due!! They seem to love doing that to women in ALL walks of life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 04:07 AM
18

Bahahahahahahahaha. Oh that's not a hobby 😂 But I like your style.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 03:56 AM
26

^ THIS!!! perfectly put
/r/askFDS06/06/21 01:04 AM
80

1000% fake. Oh no, poor man child feels bad for himself
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 12:58 AM
19

Correct!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 12:58 AM
20

Nope, but a significantly more dangerous sport.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 12:57 AM
96

Of course he meant no harm by perpetuating misogyny! Just like Trump isn't a racist by promoting white supremacy. Words have no consequences whatsoever! 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 08:22 PM
9

You found a somewhat uncommon specimen, the Male Pickme, in the wild. Related to the Nice Guys, but of a different family, this species is often seen congregating around groups of female friends bolding declaring, "I'm not like those other guys!" They eschew traditionally masculine traits, are often liberal, and like leeches, enjoy sucking the Goodwill from nearby females. Once their true colors are revealed, it is best to remove them from the group.
/r/askFDS05/06/21 12:23 AM
20

Working on trying to convince my bestie to do this with me now. I keep telling her: resource sharing, chore management and we can share a harem of underwear models. What's not to love about this?!?!?! 😍👌🏻🔥
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 03:19 AM
15

Yep, same reason IG models have picture perfect marriages and everyone is always shocked when they divorce. Athletes promote brands despite using the competitor's product. Social media is fake news all around. People are making a sales pitch for a product or service; it's not a reflection of who they are or their values.
/r/askFDS04/06/21 03:01 AM
17

And time will help heal those feelings! We all know LOGICALLY that self hatred is counter productive, but those feelings take time to change and are always legitimate. Taking a teeny step forward every day regardless of what happened the day before marches us away from those feelings.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 02:49 AM
14

This 100%. Change takes time and is self driven. Heck, if none of us had made mistakes, we wouldn't have sought out a community for support.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 02:47 AM
8

Absolutely!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 02:46 AM
28

It has less to do with you and your pics and more to do with him trying these lines on every woman to see which one sticks around long enough for him to get his dick wet. It's not about you or him wanting to get to know you. It's that you opened the door for him and granted him access to you.
/r/askFDS04/06/21 02:43 AM
73

Yes, ladies! Get 👏🏻 off 👏🏻 the 👏🏻 apps 👏🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 02:12 AM
28

No kidding! We require a whole loaf... OF THE GOOD STUFF.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 10:14 PM
40

I think that is the BEST translation of what it means 😂😂😂 +100 points to you for a fantastic laugh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 10:14 PM
15

I can't wait to see this! Thank you so much for this review. 💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 12:36 AM
9

You're arguing with explicit FDS advice here. This isn't a debate FDS sub. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/askFDS02/06/21 08:53 PM
3

If you contact a local women's resource center, they should have a list of therapists they've worked with in the past. Female therapists that work with sexual abuse cases would also be a good place to start.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 04:55 PM
164

The need to feel loved is natural, sis. But love comes in many forms- friends, family, the little girl you babysit, your elderly neighbor, your cat. Invest in those relationships. Block and delete the man that doesn't care. He's not worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 03:02 PM
23

THIS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 02:34 PM
26

There are fantastic posts about why women should multidate in the handbook. Basically, you're much less likely to build false intimacy and invest in someone that you don't know. Unless you're doing a WGTOW and just want the hot Italian sidepiece (TM), there is zero upside to this. Your batista knows you better than the dude who has taken you out on 1 or 2 dinners.
/r/askFDS02/06/21 02:33 PM
127

No man (or woman) in my life- HV, LV, Unknown Value- has EVER told me I'm bring unreasonable by multidating at the beginning. What person chooses exclusivity after they have known someone for 3 hours? It is completely illogical. In fact, go to any of the decent dating subs and everyone will tell you that most people multidate at the beginning. This isn't even an FDS thing. It's weird to commit to someone you've known for a nanosecond. Dude is looking for a codependent who validates him the secon…
/r/askFDS02/06/21 12:43 PM
116

If this were a long lost female friend? Sure. Talk about your feelings to her. But GTFO of here with the talking to a man who is not in your life about your feelings. The fuck?!? No. Terrible advice. I swear some psychologists live in a bubble where sexism, racism, and abuse doesn't exist. P.s. if you can, find a radfem therapist with at least a masters degree. If you can't, a libfem who has experience with sexual abuse cases will usually be OK as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 09:57 PM
62

That's a dude that deeeeeefinitely watches barely legal teen porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 09:52 PM
15

I'm pretty sure they are discussing dating app culture though and 80% of the dudes on there are absolutely appalling, disgusting, neckbearded scrotes. So that number tracks which is why 80% of the guys don't get any matches.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 02:19 PM
11

I think your friend sample is unusual. The only ladies I know sleeping with men within the first 3 dates are there specifically for dick and dinner, are definitely NOT looking for a relationship, and have alot of other shit going on in their lives. Not saying it's right, but the women I know are getting what they want out of it and could care less about the men. Overall- Dating apps have a higher rate of people sleeping together overall, but its still pretty low. There are some stats on that, if…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 02:14 PM
7

I'd just like to say that number of direct messages in response to this post FROM men points to exactly the issue. When it's been requested that you shut up, and your response is to send a few paragraphs about WHY you don't want to shut up...YOU ARE THE PROBLEM 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 07:22 PM
17

Oh yes! I've had a stonewaller. They just sit there and have a silent mantrum. Long story short, 7 years later they explode with a list of reasons why they hate you, and then their lady walks away and immediately finds FDS 🥰🥰🥰. So I guess, THANK YOU, SIR.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 01:48 PM
13

Ah yes!!! The 'I didn't mean it like that' Oh you meant the opposite of the word salad that came out of your face? SUPER, I was totally gonna decode that one down the line 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 01:02 PM
19

Oh that one NEEDS A spot! Literally had a 'I was joking' moment last night. Ummm no, you were being an ass and are trying to deflect. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 01:00 PM
132

I think this is a very common sentiment. Most of our parents were raised to get married by 25, buy a house in the suburbs for 3 raspberries, and then have some children. There was much less discussion during their younger years about power dynamics and a woman's ability to choose her own path whether it be married or unmarried, with or without children. Generally I will give older folks a softball overview of how I operate, and they are welcome to disagree. That being said, I refuse to engage fu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 03:09 AM
74

The classic excuse to say any racist, misogynistic, ill-informed statement ever, "iM pLAyInG dEvILs AdVoCaTe' Nah bro, you want carte blanche to say anything you want
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 02:17 AM
139

The incessant talking is the equivalent of flopping their dicks out on the table and yelling 'LOOK AT IT'. I think I'll just flop some labia out on the same table and insist that I get the the floor instead 😂.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 08:06 PM
78

Oh you mean the man makes rude and/or inappropriate comments and when called out says 'HURR DURRR ITS A JOKE' 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 07:43 PM
146

My personal fav is asking them "Want some dressing for your word salad?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 06:48 PM
2

They are great for the rotation since there's no sexual pressure and the actual dates are wonderful, which is why I've kept them around. But yeah, you're not missing much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 06:16 PM
2

My experience was totally the opposite. They never touched me or kissed me but they would take me out once a month or so to a really fancy restaurant.... literally for YEARS. With these men, it's pretty obvious there's no sex drive and they are totally avoidant emotionally. In my experience, these guys specifically target career oriented women so they can connect on that (which is where the connection begins and ends lol). In your case, it's really anyone's guess why they didn't. Trash took itse…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 05:27 AM
27

Yeah, no thanks. How many times have we needed to CoMmUiCaTE our needs and were ignored?! Nah. I'm not gonna ask for basic decency. That's not a trait that can trained in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 10:44 PM
1

Don't chase men
/r/askFDS29/05/21 10:39 PM
19

Exactly 💯 global protest. Its not even anti-FDS, it's anti- decent relationships generally.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 04:35 PM
51

While I appreciate the post about pickup artists, I don't understand why we are supporting OLD at all. There is so much evidence that the apps are strategic designed to benefit MEN and are a complete dumpster fire. There are more women who have been sexually assaulted off those apps than have found long term partnerships. The culture of hookups and meeting for drinks rather than dinner, which the apps facilitate, is detrimental to women. A quarter of the men on the apps are in relationships. Ton…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 02:49 PM
1

I feel like perhaps I misused my words here. I'm not blaming anyone for attracting bad actors. However, we should nonetheless do the work to learn to value ourselves and prioritize ourselves (and therefore, we will be less likely to be involved in unhealthy relationships by recognizing signs and leaving).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 01:26 AM
17

Edit: since editing your post to be more specific, none of this now applies in your case. Best of luck, OP! Not at all! But there is lots of vetting to be had. First and foremost, does he take safety seriously? Or does he push limits by not using safety equipment? Does he have a social network that he uses and connects with while doing his sports? If he does, then he likely won't have to drag you into it. Also, he has someone built in that can drive his ass to the ER when shit goes sideways. Doe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 07:58 PM
58

Absolutely. Everyone thinks traffickers are the bad dudes in a Liam Neeson movie. Nope. They are the old fat white dudes that produce teen porn movies. They work with children as youth pastors, foster care parents, babysitters. The consumers of this industry are every Pickmes husband sitting at his gaming chair jerking off to barely legal teens. Pedophiles, the whole lot of them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 06:33 PM
66

Downvote facts all you want, scrotes. If you google 'teen porn' you ARE the pedophile. If you're defending the industry, you support pedophiles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 06:31 PM
3

No way. I live between two beef cattle farms in the middle of Nowhereville in Flyover, USA. I still find men everywhere I go. You can too, regardless of your situation. Finding a good one? Yeah, those are hard. But if you can't find them in person, then they aren't online either. Don't let the apps delude you into thinking THAT pool is bigger somehow. Its not. It's just more of them- with easier access to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 06:03 PM
154

Hey! Those of us who were raised in barns are actually exceptional at fetching water. That's pretty much all we did as kids on farms. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 05:07 PM
7

Oh no don't feel dumb. It's societal conditioning and naivety, at worst. Everyone in this sub has behaved in good faith towards men or been a straight up Pickme, even complete savages like me. It's a journey. Ask yourself this: if another lady posted your story, would you be so judgmental? Don't be so harsh on yourself, sis. We've all been there. Pro tip from someone older: don't ever use apps again. It encourages bad behavior in even the best players and it attracts the absolute scum of the ear…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:58 PM
99

Nothing makes me thinner and sexier than downing half a greasy burger and an IPA. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:48 PM
49

We have seen it all. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:39 PM
7

Yeah I think its a hard line for therapists to walk (I'm not saying that your ex therapist wasn't trash, they probably were). If you're not codependent, you MOST likely won't attract narcs. So that part is on you. However, we must recognize that patriarchy is what creates scrotes to behave like this in the first place, not us. This is why FDS is so important. Its not about the rules, its not even about the guidelines (which don't apply to every woman on here- there are loads of us that are past …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:38 PM
320

Over 30 edition: He says he wants an adventure buddy, but spends all weekend on the couch because he's too tired from working hard all week. He says he wants a liberal/ progressive but he'd 'never date a black girl because PrEfErEnCeS' He says he wants a wild BDSM lady, but needs viagra to get it up. He says he wants an independent lady, but spends every weekend with his kids and wants her to tag along as stepmother. He says he wants a thin lady, but he only invites her to dinner at craft brewer…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:28 PM
15

Something I had to unlearn is calling men out on poor behavior. No need, sis, just ignore them. They won't listen to someone they don't respect and disrespectful men are the ones who behave poorly so really, you're just wasting your time. The second you just DGAF about how men behave one way or the other, you will really level up and you'll have the Big Dick Energy that narcs will avoid because their insecurity can't handle it. This isn't about setting boundaries or anything like that BS a thera…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:16 PM
29

Having just spent a month hanging out with my friends and their five year old, this is questionable behavior even at that age. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 12:03 PM
22

Send her this article.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 11:40 AM
3

Wait really? When my city friends come to visit, they always think I'm joking. Haha us FDS ladies live in WILD places.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 04:29 AM
17

That's fair. They are genuine in their confusion and curiosity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 03:38 AM
54

Wow, so sad. And even worse that her father is a disgusting depraved scrote; I'm sure she doesn't have the family support she needs. Here's a video of a terribly disrespectful Ramsey with Queen Sofia Vergara: Ramsey being a Scrote on Jay Leno
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 02:05 AM
46

For some of us rural FDSers, the bears are very real. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 02:00 AM
174

I can already hear the man choir singing 'NoOoOoOo ItS dIFfErEnT' NOPE. It's not. The cognitive dissonance they live with should be DEBILITATING
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 12:00 AM
107

Oh, I do. And am constantly criticized for 'lacking empathy'. Nah, bro, I just save the empathy for the ladies in my life, but I'll wear my No Empathy category as a badge of honor. 👸🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 04:01 PM
122

NVM* FIFY 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 03:58 PM
4

Yeah I don't think his argument nor the science was fleshed out well at all. He also makes a convoluted argument about both biology and social norms (nature vs nuture). But the point he is trying to make- that men don't see women as human, but rather as objects- is a good one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 03:13 PM
18

Anything goes in public spaces in the US. Open carry, preaching, raw milk vendors. It's the wild west out here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 02:13 PM
24

Moving from NVM to LVM is not the level up flex some may think it is. She makes him realize leaving her and the kids is bad? SMH. Ladies, you don't need to ExPlAiN or CoMmUnIcAtE or TeAcH a man how to love or care. A HVM will show up and stick around, full stop. Don't get sucked in by the patriarchy that this is the love story of the ages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:40 PM
30

Sounds like you may be using OLD. This is not FDS style. FDS does not advocate hookups or casual situations nor does it advocate for OLD, given the many well documented anti-women issues the apps promote. If you want to do a quick date, go for appetizers or tapas rather than a 5 course meal. A dinner date doesn't have to be a marathon and you're way less likely to get assaulted when you're at a busy restaurant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:32 PM
74

I actually love this. He's saying that men are aroused because they don't respect girls and women. He mentions the beauty/ fashion industry keeping girls sexualized, among others, but says the real crux of the problem is that men are conditioned to see women as subhuman. The fact that he did a study and revealed that he himself was attracted to girls disgusted and appalled him. This is a dude explaining to other dudes what patriarchy is and openly discussing his internalized misogyny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:26 PM
35

Wife leaves career to get married. Husband makes financial decisions behind her back and leaves family to pursue career. The 'he respects her and doesn't pressure her sexually' bar is way too low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:17 PM
36

Not in the US. You must be European? Every time I go to the EU, I have to tell people not to take photos of people. Americans find this shocking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 11:42 AM
50

Honestly most of these guys have a very low attention span. The 3 month FDS rule really works although in my experience, if you meet a man who is just after sex, he will give up after 3 dates. Trash takes itself out pretty quickly. Disclaimer: I've been dating men over 30 for over a decade.
/r/askFDS27/05/21 11:22 AM
78

Yes. The Office is the essentially the perfect FDS parody show because every character has several NV, ZV, and LV traits and none are the same. It's amazing the writers were able to create so many different types of LV. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 03:36 AM
20

We've all been there! I'd walk and wash your mind of him. Best XX
/r/askFDS27/05/21 01:38 AM
137

This isn't about ideals. This is about the dichotomy of judgment between a woman and man doing ostensibly the same thing EXCEPT the woman has no responsibility during her time, and the man abandons his family during his. Who gets blamed in both scenarios? The woman. This is a societal issue: NOT a television issue.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:37 AM
57

Yes!!! I love this sentient!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:35 AM
44

YESSSSS!!! GET OFF THE APPS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 01:24 AM
145

The same reason any man changes his mind after he says 'I WANT TO TAKE THINGS SLOWWWW' and you say 'That's fine, I'm seeing other people' They need to feel needed and want to keep multiple balls in the air. They want the toy that everyone else wants, and it is DISGUSTING. This is a very common thing!! Throw the whole man away.
/r/askFDS27/05/21 12:57 AM
3

Did your friend ever engage in exploiting other people for her benefit? Did she ever support child trafficking? Did she ever become addicted to anything? If not, this dude is shooting way above his league. Scrotes can have each other as far as I'm concerned. HVW need to next men who exploit women.
/r/askFDS26/05/21 11:42 AM
47

This. HV people are not bored and lonely. They have social circles, they obtained the "Make Friends" skillset during their youth, they go outside their homes and try new things. Ladies, there are so many male-dominated activities that I've encountered in my life. Breweries, boat shows, disc golf, shooting ranges, gyms, meet-up groups, DnD clubs, welding classes, hiking/ trail cleanup volunteer groups, fishing expos... gosh the list is endless. Go out and meet men. Don't advertise yourself on Tin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 11:12 AM
55

I suppose it's slightly better than 50 50. There's that silver lining. Hopefully she takes this time to save all her money, buy a nice condo when the market drops and replaces him with a little dog.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 02:40 AM
58

Absolutely!! So, when a father works 8-5+ then takes 3 hours to exercise after work the majority of the week, where does that leave the mother? The last thing any new mom wants is her mother-in-law co-parenting because her husband is unwilling to pay for childcare and/or adjust his 'me time' schedule. This was the classic presentation of the father who 'babysits' occasionally and is present for major holidays when photos will be involved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 11:47 PM
25

Ugh I think we all wish this type of behavior from men was wild or abnormal. Unfortunately, they're consistent in the WORST WAY. She needs out and hopefully a handful of us can help unlock that door for her to then choose to open and step through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 11:41 PM
16

This is the world we live in. This sub simply calls it out. Hugs to you, sister. 💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 10:11 PM
74

Who needs a speech? Just move out, he will get his closure. Bye 👋🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 10:10 PM
100

Actually. Exactly maid. He pays for the place, she's the live in maid/ chef service.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 10:09 PM
44

This is what I suggested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 10:09 PM
7

Do not use OLD. Full stop. The apps are designed to sell women and keep men swiping. It's bad for anyone HV. Period. Go meet people and build connections through activities.
/r/askFDS25/05/21 08:48 PM
107

Hypothetical. She's a live-in girlfriend and they are discussing having kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 08:38 PM
205

Sounds like she's the one pushing for marriage and kids. Why these Pickmes want reluctant fathers, I'll never know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 08:22 PM
16

"Makes sense, because you're clearly a 16/100"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 07:00 PM
89

Well, it's true that shirtless photos of men reveal nothing but audacity. The administrator got that part right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 02:09 PM
54

This! While I appreciate OP's message. The real message should be "OLD companies do not care about your well-being, safety, or happiness. Thus, do not use the apps."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 12:32 PM
20

Join us hags. It's lovely here. 💅🏻 🐈
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 02:31 AM
13

Nope nope nope. All the nopes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 02:25 AM
24

This. Ladies, OLD doesn't work. Finding something in common is incredibly hard when people join Bumble for ONE reason: to make friends. You need to have something in common with someone to build a connection- something beyond "hi! Will you be my friend?" This is adult life. We aren't in Kindergarten.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 11:17 PM
60

This is only anecdotal information, but I read a comment on the Ask Reddit sub about someone that did video editing for porn. He also said he wasn't a consumer but took the job out of necessity. He said that the videos were so disturbing, he started abusing alcohol, had trouble sleeping, and had serious emotional issues. You might be able to look it up- the question was asking people who worked in the porn industry what it was like. Nobody that works in an industry that exploits people walks awa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 10:55 AM
88

Some men will also fuck ketchup bottles, so they could just be depraved NVM who think of you as an object. Assuming they are more run of the mill LVM, your attitude has triggered The Chase and now you present a challenge for them to conquer. Have you read the book 'Men Love Bitches'? It gives you insight into this. Being labeled difficult doesn't mean they dislike your personality. This is the irony for Pickmes- they grovel to cater towards men but being an aloof bitch would actually get them mo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 10:49 AM
1

Hmm... I'm not sure you're familiar with FDS principles but multidating is one of the core tenants. Most of the advice on FDS is based on maximizing female benefit. Exclusivity is one of those. Also, being exclusive doesn't mean you have to be actively dating a ton of people. But it allows you to keep your options open, in the same way men usually do.
/r/askFDS24/05/21 10:33 AM
1

Ahhhh ok this changes the dynamic. If moving is in your best interest regardless, then it is definitely low risk for you as well. I'm curious- why are you exclusive with a man you don't see?
/r/askFDS24/05/21 03:48 AM
102

Her 'Thank you' at the end was perfection. 🙌🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 03:19 AM
196

Good for you, sis. Any man that treats women like objects to be consumed, used, and abused, is trash. Full stop.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 03:18 AM
7

You can't vet in a LDR because there are no shared experiences (actions) to bond together. It's only words. Words are fantasy and false intimacy. Relationships are based on shared actions and bonding, not a textationship. Men very rarely move for women. Men very rarely will marry a woman with whom they haven't spent long periods of time over several years. That means he will likely ask you to uproot your life to take a chance and move in with him. It could work out or, like most LDRs, it could n…
/r/askFDS24/05/21 03:15 AM
157

Are they, though? 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 02:57 AM
32

I believe it's a grey peacock pheasant. Edit: looks like it's a Great Argus, after all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:20 PM
51

Amen sister. It's pandemic in men over 30 as well to the point where I am now the one pushing for sexual compatibility earlier on that I used to otherwise I'm left with dinner dates literally FOR YEARS. I swear out here, it's straight up asexual dudes or total fuckboys that want a ONS immediately. "Does your dick work?" Is a legitimate question because if you're dating over 30 (and especially over 40), I'd say it's 50/50.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:13 PM
143

'I wasn't even interested, you ugly duck' 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 02:40 PM
88

Correct. It's an annoyingcock.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 02:19 PM
360

The side lean-away is key 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 02:03 PM
137

I posted the video because I literally had a date like this last night 😂 It was comically bad. 'Leaning away hen' is my vibe for the week.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 02:03 PM
105

NGL, alot of dudes I know could benefit from some ✂️💉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:15 AM
4

Haha good ones. My last round of OLD, I actually ended up with young guys that catfished as older. LOL I ended up with 3 dates with closeted asexuals. I was so pent up, I was ready to start a harem of underwear models.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:12 AM
22

Thanks for writing this post, Catz! I think it's important for FDSers to hear this. the bots don't give them the perfomative emotional labor they're so used to getting from women Wow. Spot on. I noticed when I used OLD, I'd match the length of messages men sent (mirroring). Most of them assumed I wasn't interested because I wasn't responding to their 6 word sentences with paragraphs. Even though they outnumber us 4 to 1 on most apps, still they expect us to perform the emotional labor. Despite t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:08 AM
5

I'd like to submit some as well: Did you match with a woman who lives 400 miles away from you because you're in her town for 2 nights but didn't put that in your profile? Stop it and get a life. Are you still married? Stop it you selfish prick; everyone knows you're the reason for the dead bedroom. Did you ask her to your house on the first date? Stop it, Ted Bundy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 02:34 AM
12

Karate chop them right outta your life. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 09:54 PM
5

PREACH
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 09:34 PM
27

And this is how women get murdered under the guise of BDSM. I hope shes able to realize that her live is in danger every second this man has access to her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 09:09 PM
16

This is the way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 07:08 PM
8

I hope the ladies of FDS that are using OLD ser this comment because YES. Please write a post about this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 06:37 PM
38

Ugh yes, men that skip leg day are THE WORST.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 06:20 PM
13

Exactly. No disrespectful scrote is going to respect your opinion. Thats... kinda the definition of an offensive person. So if women follow these 'guidelines' they are just teaching the men to hide it better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 06:13 PM
37

Yes. The solution should be to report them under special tabs, one for This Scrote is Racist, one for Needs Therapy, and General Assholery. This is the only work women should be doing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 04:55 PM
18

Holding out for The One, eh? Maybe I should rethink my comment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 04:25 PM
48

This is gold. I nominate this comment for "FDS translates Patriarchy" end of year award. 🙌🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 04:23 PM
28

Yes although at the time when it was created, Bumble was a godsend to women as Tinder had no blocking/ reporting system and men routinely sent women dick pics. At its inception, Bumble designed a system to get away from that. Obviously, much had changed in the world and OLD is all trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 04:22 PM
62

Powerlifters but no steroids. If they can't throw me around the bedroom, I'm not interested. Skin color, hair (or bald), height doesn't matter. If your arms are like yacht ropes and you can squat 600 pounds, I'm in. Edit: Or Idris Elba, at any age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 04:06 PM
9

Its ok. I actually thought the same thing when I first read the article. "Wow, nice, they are explaining microaggressions and fetishization and telling women to block" and then, of course, it took a turn for the worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:54 PM
14

Every time I see something related to gender, I think "how does this benefit women?" And this messaging clearly does not, in any way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:46 PM
103

Exactly and that's why I posted this. The corporate messaging that it's an app "designed by women for women" is libfem logic to maximize profits to sell their products (female bodies) to men. More Female Empowerment bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:37 PM
59

But no blaming or shaming, Burrito! You must LISTEN to them. 🙄🙄🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:34 PM
19

Exactly. Choice feminism is bullshit and it's bad for Pickmes too. There are no good outcomes if a woman 'chooses' to communicate it out with some scrote that insulted her on a dating app.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:33 PM
36

The message isn't "block and report him and let us take care of it." Instead its: if you feel unsafe, you can block and we will take care of it. But also, it's totally fine to talk to him. And if you do, make sure to listen to him and communicate kindly without shaming. Just no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:01 PM
93

Yes. And if a man actively engages in rude behavior, he is either purposely being a dick or is too oblivious to care. Either way, he doesn't respect women and he won't listen if you try to tell him where he went wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 02:59 PM
151

Ding ding ding! Exactly. WE are the product, MEN are the consumers. Corporate needs to cater to their customer base.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 02:57 PM
65

Ladies, if you are on the apps please block or unmatch ANY man that fetishizes you or is low-key aggressive. Period. Under NO circumstances should you engage with him. It's not your job to figure out his intentions, nor communicate with him, nor listen, nor teach him morals, nor to forgive him. WE ARE NOT MOTHERING MANCHILDREN. Kick the scrote to the curb.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 02:56 PM
26

Remove him from your house. If it's his house, find a better living situation.
/r/askFDS22/05/21 05:17 AM
68

Yeah, so with one of my switchblades in each hand? CAN DO. I'm sure 'Knife-Porcupines, but make it FASHION' is on the De Le Renta's mood boards. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 01:54 AM
40

I think that's great advice. Simply wait until you've known him long enough and are ready to have the sex talk to bring it up. The other method you could consider is discussing it within the context of a story. For example: "My friend found her 12 year old son watching porn the other day..." and gage his reactions.
/r/askFDS21/05/21 09:08 PM
59

Because organizing requires chaotic energy, of course. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 07:33 PM
131

Peterson and his "men are ordered and stable while women are chaotic" thesis is such BS that anyone with half a brain cell can look up crime stats, war, and patriarchal societies and see that men are the destroyers of life. 🙄 Also, he contradicts himself when he says that "violent attacks are what happens when men don't have partners." WHERES THAT CALM MASCULINE STABILITY THEN? These pseudointellectuals can't even keep their own story straight. Bleh he needs to be thrown into the trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 07:12 PM
2

I've found that if you have a non-pink collar job (teachers, nurses, secretaries), most men assume you are a boss bitch anyway regardless of your look. However, I've been dating men over 30 for a long, long time so your mileage may vary depending on your age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 03:22 PM
595

Wow. I totally misinterpreted the drawing. I thought this was FDS fan art depicting a relationship with a NVM. Because it is 100% on point. Next piece in the series would be her packing up her bags,, crying, with her little dog in her car while he's gaming and doesn't even notice. Next piece would be her in her new apartment, thriving, leveling up, and his dusty ass is begging her to come back. Final piece is her having a friend group of ladies that help each other. (Scrote is now on incel reddi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 03:18 PM
5

Thanks Daisy! I am definitely the most 'low maintenance' lady in my friend circle, so I'm only sharing my own experience. I'm not sure what other gals like us do. For me, these strategies have worked to signal that I am vetting for high effort: 1) Be extremely confident. I try to have perfect posture, I walk with authority, I have an intense presence, I use direct communication, I maintain eye contact. Attitude goes a long way. 2) Follow the other FDS guidelines to an absolute T. Don't text men …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 04:00 AM
70

First of all, you can cut out anyone in your life for any reason whatsoever at any time. You don't need anyone's permission and you do not need to explain yourself. Second, if this man is paying for prostitutes, kick him to the curb. It doesn't matter what you tell him, he doesn't treat women like humans. They are objects. He won't respect your opinion about him one way or another. You can't help him see the light. Third, it is incredibly hard for men and women to be friends. The VAST majority o…
/r/askFDS21/05/21 03:30 AM
9

Only works for 13 years, though. That's a problem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 03:22 AM
24

For the record, I am also pro-curfew for men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 03:21 AM
22

Make sure whoever you are gifting them to isn't going to have to awkwardly carry them around too long. That is NOT enjoyable.
/r/askFDS20/05/21 07:23 PM
48

I'd be WAY more concerned about the wild love bombing than the woman that blocked him. Why was he blocked? Think about why you block men: Aggression. Stalking. Inappropriate Behavior. Lying. Think hard about his general behavior and way he's blaming another woman's FEELINGS for his inability to contact her about a transmissible disease that will affect her health and the health of her partners.
/r/askFDS20/05/21 07:15 PM
13

Nice. I love those moments. Shaking up patriarchy one outfit at a time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:21 PM
18

Heck yes! I've been rocking a faux hawk with my shaved to skin undercut.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:19 PM
32

Awww Twolipz, we've all held out hope that a boy child would one day discover kindness and empathy. Cheers to a better future 🥂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:13 PM
92

Even our red states are turning blue. The South will indeed rise again, with a socialist blue wave led by Stacey Abrams. They brought in their thugs to beat us. They packed the courts to control out bodies. They elected a straight up traitor to the White House. It's the last stand for White Supremacist Misogyny. Those dicks are going down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:11 PM
35

My mom (white, grew up in the 50s in Jim Crow south) always advised me: Vote with the Colored Ladies. Their interest is your interest, and following them is always the right way for feminism. A bit reductivist, and perhaps not PC today, but she was right then and it's still true today. Fuck those Pickmes that voted for Trump.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:07 PM
5

Not enough research on medical procedures preformed on younger children. With teen birth rates dropping tremendously, I figured 16 would be the best number to balance science with problem solving. When I am Queen Supreme of the West, though, I will definitely have a team of experts to make the final decision.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:00 PM
6

Yes. And also the men who want to sleep with you and say they don't want kids. Don't want a kid but still want sex, Bill? Better back that up with some snip snip ✂️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:57 PM
11

And Chad had a vasectomy. 💁🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:46 PM
128

These GOPscrotes (say it like Goat, but with a P; Gope-scrote) are ending humanity and they don't even realize it. Just look at the stats on number of people having regular sex for GenZ and Millennials. It is dropping precipitously. Or the huge decline in birth rates in the western world. Or women choosing single motherdom without men (and choosing female babies). Or the divorce rates. Women are opting out en masse and the Republican Party is just adding fuel to the fire.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:31 PM
452

Mandatory vasectomies at age 16 and requiring a wife's consent to undo said vasectomy would effectively end almost all abortion cases. Problem solved. Edit: Downvote me to hell, scrotes. You think FDS is a fringe group? LOL. Look around you. Women everywhere are choosing not to marry, not to have babies, not to engage in sex. These women are the real silent majority. Time's up, Todd. Tik. Tok.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:24 PM
23

AHHHHH NOOO WE CANT HAVE THAT!!!! 🤯😱
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:12 PM
97

Shout-out to the androgynous ladies that offer us a different path than the invisible/ piece of meat dichotomy. It may not be everyone's cup of tea, but there are absolute queens that are out there gender bending their looks and I'm living for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:11 PM
154

I want to add that men that stay in loveless relationships for the benefits of having a bangmaid will never be men to treat a HVW with the respect she deserves and demands. We don't date men that have had forever gfs. So, no, he won't ever 'be better' because he met his Dream girl. Also, message to the female lurkers on this sub: we have been in your shoes. It gets better. You deserve more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:04 PM
20

Absolutely. I'm really grateful for the mod who posted this as there has been a recent growing trend among users on here with questionable statements. I agree with you completely. 💯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:47 PM
137

Mandatory vasectomies at age 16 and requiring a wife's consent to undo said vasectomy would effectively end almost all abortion cases. Problem solved. Edit: Downvote me to hell, scrotes. You think FDS is a fringe group? LOL. Look around you. Women everywhere are choosing not to marry, not to have babies, not to engage in sex. These women are the real silent majority. Time's up, Todd. Tik. Tok.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:35 PM
72

There's plenty of equality in upper middle class America- as women rise up the ladder, they can pawn off their traditional duties onto women of color! Totally great for the feminist cause 👏🏻 The growing number of Female CEOs of massive corporations that exploit indigenous people's, destroy the rainforest, and enslave 3rd world child into labor is a TOTAL VICTORY!!! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:32 PM
26

Interesting. Let me see if I understand your point by rephrasing it. You're saying that FDS encourages looksmaxxing (makeup, nails, etc) in order to attract the highest quality/ effort men? And, conversely, that by not looksmaxxing, you will not attract good/ kind dates? If so, then my reaction to this would be: I disagree. I think FDS is well aware that "low maintenance" type of women also get picked but that constantly signaling that you are a Cool Girl (i.e. one of the guys/ doesn't like make…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:27 PM
113

I'd love a mod to respond but I'll do my best. It's not that men should pay for dates because of the pink tax but because women do the majority of work in most relationships. Emotional labor cognitive, chores, childbearing, childrearing, taking care of aging parents, taking care of pets, etc. Even if you're a Cool Girl that's Childfree (me), I still find myself doing the majority of the planning, managing, organizing, helping, and caretaking in relationships. As long as women are expected to do …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 03:17 PM
2

CORRECT ^
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 01:59 AM
40

Because they're completely inept and have never ATTEMPTED to think about women's safety. Oh it's bad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 06:42 PM
61

That's totally legitimate reasoning!! Never agree to anything you're not comfortable with or KNOW isn't going to work. If I had a dime for every dipshit wanting to take me on a first or second date HIKE, ALONE, IN THE WOODS, I've have enough dollars to treat myself and a girlfriend to a lovely dinner 🤦‍♀️.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 06:16 PM
98

I was just going to say: ARBORETUM, BOTANICAL GARDENS. very fun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 05:41 PM
20

Now this is objectively an aggressive way to handle it, BUT, I have plenty of men comment on my posture. Yes, it's fantastic, I know. It's fun to reply, "Yeah! You should try standing up straight sometime" Same goes for most comments.
/r/askFDS19/05/21 04:16 PM
38

TL; DR: I don't like you because of my porn addition.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 12:46 PM
41

And FDS works for ALL relationships- including co-workers, business partners, family members, friends, rando dudes at the gym, etc. In fact, FDS style principles regarding interpersonal dynamics are well established in psychology and business literature. Scrotes are just salty about it because now we are applying them to dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 04:15 AM
8

This. 🙌🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 04:08 AM
3

Exactly 💯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 03:41 AM
7

This is outlined in HVM Character Traits section of the FDS handbook.
/r/askFDS19/05/21 01:47 AM
35

😂😂😂😂😂 This comment is everything
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:40 PM
16

Your partner should be there to celebrate your success!! This smells like a jealously issue that will only escalate in the future.
/r/askFDS18/05/21 10:02 PM
3

I've been going back and forth over the 'no hookups' comment. It is established in most of the dating subs that women who have this in their profile will actually engage in hookups. Of course, women are allowed to change their mind when they meet someone, but engaging in ONS does not benefit them and only serves men. However, women new to OLD may not be aware of this so they could post this on their profile in good faith and indeed mean it genuinely. HVW match their words and actions and know th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 05:21 PM
497

Another case of 'he doesn't love you, sis.' I love how internalized misogyny has conditioned women to think that men won't marry them because of the cost of a wedding. It doesn't matter if we are low maintenance or high maintenance. The man won't marry you because he doesn't love you. He loves the benefits YOU provide and doesn't want to give you legal rights in return. Full stop.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 05:07 PM
119

^ THIS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 03:22 PM
140

My guess is he went back to his porn addiction within a month of a funeral. Man Guilt doesn't last long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 02:44 PM
94

Yup. And no upvotes on it. This post was recently cross-posted in another sub and the comments there are the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 02:43 PM
233

If he wanted to, he would. Instead he jacked off to her dying body. The comments on the OP and in other subs where this was linked are even worse. I can't believe people don't connect porn addiction/ fetishes with abuse. Unbelievable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 02:42 PM
191

Yup. Getting a boner over a woman's suffering to the point of death is DEFINITELY 'good person' status. 👌🏻 Classic leftist sex pozzy misogyny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 02:40 PM
6

Where is anyone being made fun of? These are COMMON behaviors that many women including myself, as stated in the post, have engaged in. It's a warning list. We can do better. I'm think that my words have made you exceptionally defensive and that was not the intention. That being said, defending these behaviors is not the correct reaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 09:09 PM
0

You don't know women going home with men, or to men's homes on a first or second date and engaging in completely unprotected sex? Who said it's to brag? I personally know more than I can count on my fingers and toes. *that is EXACTLY the pickme behavior outlined in the original post* Do you have any other points I can clarify for you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:48 PM
-1

Ouf. I think this reply speaks for itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:44 PM
26

I'm watching a LOT of threads go completely off the rails. This post wasn't meant to be bait: it was meant to be a list of pickme behaviors that my friends and MYSELF have engaged in in the past. Yikes. Yikes. Yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:37 PM
7

It is CLEAR that this post is not about women coerced into sex work, women who are being raped, or women who are in abusive relationships. I'm not sure what your point is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:12 PM
20

Very good points. I'm editing the driving one to more accurately reflect Pickme behavior I have engaged in in the past i.e. driving to their city to make it more convenient for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:11 PM
13

There seems to be a LOT of confusion about the phrase 'BIRTH CONTROL' Birth control is a category of devices both chemical and physical that prevent pregnancy. IUDs are birth control Condoms are birth control Diaphragms are birth control Hormonal pills are birth control If a woman is using NO FORMS OF CONTRACEPTIVE and engaging in sex with men without the goal of becoming pregnant, this is a pick-me behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:40 PM
27

PSA: birth control does not have to mean hormonal. Sponges, diaphragms, condoms, and spermicide are all examples of birth control. Choosing to not use birth control puts women at risk of pregnancy. I edited the post to say "contraceptives" in case people are unclear on this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:34 PM
3

I misread your comment. This is not a post about sexual assault or leaving abusers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:29 PM
4

Which of these bullet points do you feel is not specifically about dating?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:14 PM
47

Yes, queen. Exactly. I edited the birth control point as the issue is having unprotected sex with random men and not using protection to prevent pregnancy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:08 PM
7

Every one of these bullet points refers to a woman in regards to her dating experience with men. A woman who is leveling up does not meet random men at their house after 9pm. Because, like you said, if she DGAF about men then why would she date at all? Why would a woman who DGAF about men have unprotected sex?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:06 PM
22

Edited the birth control point. Engaging in unprotected sex with random men you meet off the internet while not using birth control/ condoms is absolutely Pickme behavior. Letting a man you don't know 'hit it raw' puts you at risk much more than it does him. Don't do it. Regarding anti-vax: this is not the same as not vaxxed (because you haven't had access to it, or have an autoimmune disorder, etc). We are in a global pandemic. Meeting people on dates without taking precautions is extremely hig…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:04 PM
31

PSA: do not online date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 10:59 AM
18

Exactly. Of course we all have regrets if we've been the Forever GF. But you can't get that time back. It's important to start thinking about what is ahead of you rather than focusing on past mistakes. If you blow off every other FDS rule but the timeline to marriage, you'll never be in that situation again. 2 years and no ring? NEEEEEEEEXT!
/r/askFDS17/05/21 03:25 AM
12

Holy smokes! I clicked on your link. Artistic, that needs to be a post all in its own OMG. Please make a post!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 03:22 AM
50

At least your purchases from Target won't sexually assault you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 03:18 AM
3

You can avoid all of this by blocking them. I highly recommend.
/r/askFDS17/05/21 02:44 AM
11

You shouldn't "need to work on" anything with someone you just met.
/r/askFDS17/05/21 02:44 AM
11

Get a second job. If I had made even 10 bucks for every hour I spent on some Going Nowhere Nathan, I'd have another 100k in the bank.
/r/askFDS17/05/21 02:41 AM
60

Continue the counseling, concentrate on what you want out of your life, reimagine and reinvent yourself. As for your other questions: 1) You are worth the effort. He was a low effort person towards you. You're not responsible for other people's actions. It doesn't matter why he did what he did and the moments you spend psychoanalyzing him are wasted time in your life. 2) Maybe he's emotionally stunted , maybe he's totally codependent, maybe he is a Scorpio and decided he had to go for a vegan wi…
/r/askFDS17/05/21 02:39 AM
42

Don't. Use. OLD.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 01:58 AM
69

And, to be honest: it's okay to accept that it is HIS house due to the circumstances. In that case, he should be funding all of it including mortgage, furnishing, repairs. Here, you lose all claim until you are able to rectify your financial situation and are added to the title. Do not invest any money into a home, car, houseboat, spaceship, or submarine that is not legally yours.
/r/askFDS16/05/21 01:22 PM
54

Should a marriage dissolve, it's important that you have claim to any capital that you invested in. A judge will be evaluating whose name is on the title and when the home was purchased. Having no name on the title and no legal marriage prior to purchase will tip the scales against any claim you may make, effectively making your 'investment' null.
/r/askFDS16/05/21 01:13 PM
128

If it's LEGALLY not your house you shouldn't be investing any capital into it. This doubly goes for investing capital into a house that is owned by someone who isn't LEGALLY your spouse.
/r/askFDS16/05/21 12:52 PM
3

The other commenter is spot on. I'd also recommend taking a year or two to become comfortable as a singleton. I've had friends that have created milestones for themselves- for example, they did not date for one year following the breakup. They realized towards the end of that year how unprepared they were at the beginning of it.
/r/askFDS16/05/21 11:55 AM
3

Even easier!!! Change the locks 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 02:27 AM
3

Don't tell him. Words are nothing SHOW HIM BY WALKING THE WALK OUT THAT DOOR
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 02:26 AM
18

You don't know that. The fact that you have to question is the issue!!! Nobody should have to read texts and employ the wisdom of forums to figure out what their "partner" is doing. You. Don't. Trust. Him. And you shouldn't !! His behavior is sketchy AF. Walk away and leave the drama behind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:38 AM
120

From an evolutionary biology standpoint this is a false equivalent. Female primates choose partners based on traits other than looks. Intelligence, charisma, leadership, tool-making, teamwork are essential in the human/ primate world. Early humans created communities in which they raised their young. Having pretty hair is irrelevant or at least, far less important than mental and emotional faculties. Also, rape, infanticide, and murder is fairly widespread in the animal kingdom. We should be car…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:35 AM
18

If there's no issue, why are you asking for advice? your instincts are right and there is one
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:33 AM
36

Therapy works. You need to change your neural networks to not let this ex live rent free in your brain. It's okay to have 'bad' days! Do the work to make sure most days are fantastic.
/r/askFDS16/05/21 01:25 AM
48

So you're dating a dishonest struggling alcoholic? The way to confront this situation: evaluate your OWN worth Figure out if this man's behavior is something you're fine with tolerating forever and not complaining about again, OR walk away and never look back. Your choice. The handbook and a community of women are here to support when you choose the latter option. When is not a typo. Take that to heart.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:21 AM
21

Oh my goodness yes!!! 'Marinating in their lies' I'm saving that line for later 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 12:14 PM
100

CRIES IN OLD WHITE MAN I am dying laughing. Sorry, my dude. Nobody feels bad for you. We are tired of looking at your busted-ass face
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 10:34 AM
5

Dribbling/ drooling while drinking milk. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:20 AM
347

That woman is totally checked out of the relationship and he doesn't even realize it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:13 AM
36

YES!!! a garbage nest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 10:38 PM
67

It will be exactly the same: but messier 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 10:03 PM
4

HA! That's the lowest price ever for an Airbnb: one cookie. 😂 I live adjacent to multiple major ski areas and deal with 'friends' wanting to 'stop by' all the time. It took me one season to realize that they wanted to drive in at 11pm and leave to go ski at 6am after sleeping on my couch. This is exceptionally rude behavior and none of us need to put up with it.
/r/askFDS14/05/21 09:27 PM
3

It's not about blaming yourself!! We've ALL made choices to our own detriment. Good friends who want to visit and spend time with you will do just that. 'Friends' who are using you for a crash pad will behave exactly how this person is. Would you ever treat one of your girlfriends like this? NO Therefore she doesn't have the right to do the same to you. You got this!
/r/askFDS14/05/21 09:17 PM
24

Do not ask IF they've been tested. This opens the opportunity for easy man-lying. Instead, ask them to LOGIN TO THEIR ONLINE HEALTH PORTAL and show you the results. These people will stop at nothing to print off some BS results to throw at us, or lie about testing date/time/panel.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 09:12 PM
205

Getting 'comfortable' is simply them treating you like the frog in the pot of water. They are slowly turning up the heat in hopes that you don't notice the temperature increase. Good thing we have our own thermometers
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 09:03 PM
10

SHUT IT DOWN She's using you and you know it Just say you're busy and stop responding to her. We've all had friends like that: they pretend they want to see you and then use your place as a free Airbnb. NAH, SIS.
/r/askFDS14/05/21 09:00 PM
216

I don't think our male lurkers have women in their lives that want to see their penis anyway. 🤭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 07:09 PM
289

Fast forward 5 years, Gamer Gavin posts on Reddit deadbedroom, "My wife says she's not attracted to me and we haven't had sex in 3 years AND I DONT KNOW WHYYYYY"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 06:30 PM
10

We've all been there, OP. Please don't feel bad. I too tried OLD and had very similar experiences to you. Alot of bad actors ruined it for everyone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:13 PM
18

To be fair, OLD was a very different place 10 years ago. It was pretty high quality because it took hours to build a profile. No men seeking escorts or OnlyFans. Once the swiping apps gained popularity, it was over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:11 PM
86

PSA: this is a perfect example of why you should leave the OLD apps. OP would have never met this man in the wild- because he lives far, far away!!! OLD is for men seeking external validation. I PROMISE your HVM- hell, even most LVM- are NOT on there. Its toxic, unhealthy men looking for escorts, free/ easy sex who are often poly or cheaters (or both). Get 👏🏻 off 👏🏻 the 👏🏻 apps 👏🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 11:59 AM
49

What if you want a new job? What if you'd like to relocate somewhere else for family/job/opportunities? What if you'd like to update the bathroom/kitchen? What if you want to grow a garden outside? What if you want children? Being in a partnership means compromise. Compromise means MAKING CHANGES for your partner: on both sides. If he wants things his way all the time and someone to clean up and cook, he can hire a maid and a chef. You are not not his employee who is trading work for a home.
/r/askFDS14/05/21 01:57 AM
84

You're asking this question because you KNOW IT IS AN INCREDIBLY BAD IDEA Your instincts are correct. This man has made no legal commitment to you. Even if he had, why is this not a matter of compromise so YOU have access to the career/job/family opportunities you'd like. Men leave. Men cheat. Men die. Don't blindly follow anyone. EVER
/r/askFDS14/05/21 01:24 AM
64

So why are you considering marrying someone who is 'keeping' you as an actual bangmaid and threatens to kick you out if you do something he doesn't approve of? Nah. Sis. You can do better. Leave.
/r/askFDS14/05/21 01:20 AM
47

Not sure but don't care LOL p.s. tortillas are life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:54 AM
20

OMG SO MUCH THIS. I've explained my dog's temperment to hundreds of men and I swear, 90% of them disagree with me and try to mansplain. The best part? He had training with the police. I tell them he bites if you do XY or Z. "Oh no, DOGS LOVE MEEEE HE WOULD NEVER BITE MEEEEEE" **chomp** "OMG I CANT BELIEVE HE BIT ME WAAAAAAAA"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:52 AM
85

The best part is if you take them to a professional (animal behavioralist), they actually get better. Unlike their human counterparts...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:46 AM
87

I hope I made you laugh. The posts written on the relationship subs about male HUMANS are almost interchangeable with the literature I have to read for work (animal science). Just last week, I read a post from a woman complaining about something her husband did and my friend had the exact same complaint about her baby lambs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:45 AM
47

In another episode of Low Value Limbo, a woman begs boyfriend to see her because he doesn't want to....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:36 AM
18

Oh what a GEM. He must've had extra deep pockets to hold that audacity. Cargo pants maybe! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:53 PM
194

Yeah... I tried CoMmUnIcAtInG but figured I should just take care of the issue myself. He tries real hard though!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:37 PM
28

Time to institute male curfew. After 9pm, all males must be accompanied by a female member of the household. Otherwise, they must stay at home. I guarantee stranger rape would vanish overnight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:33 PM
54

Hag comes from the old English word for enchantress or witch. 🔮 🐈‍⬛ 🌙
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:28 PM
88

At this point, I'm not settling for anything less than Idris Elba in look and The Rock in personality. 💁🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:23 PM
864

I too have a live-in partner who works out, is always naked, has dry skin and is VERY hairy!!! I told him a few times that he was smelly, especially after swimming. My solution was to give him baths with an oatmeal shampoo once a week, problem solved! They even make them for fleas and ticks too. I'd recommend trading in your current partner to get one like mine. They run you about 150$ from the local humane society.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:11 PM
69

But but but women shouldn't have any standards at all! They should sleep in laundry nests and eat their slugs with unadulterated JOY! /s Die mad, scrotes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 10:02 PM
93

SNAPS Wasted three years? Nah sis, you got out after three years!!! Well done and stay strong! These men always bring back the crazy with vengeance once they realize how thoroughly fucked and unprepared for life they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 08:41 PM
7

Been there done that with a housemate. It is deeply disturbing to be forced to listen to someone's RELATIONSHIT as a captive in ones own home. 'TAKE IT OUTSIDE AND I'M CALLING THE POLICE FOR A WELLNESS CHECK' seems to work well too 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 08:37 PM
96

This story is very common and everyone needs to read and learn from it!! We should absolutely raise our sisters up, BUT you cannot help someone who isn't listening and doesn't want to change. It's amazing that you got an apology. I hope she has genuinely worked on changing those toxic habits that were detrimental to her and alienating for her friends. Keep one eye open if you choose to rekindle a relationship. Many times apologies like this are disingenuous because the author needs something fro…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 08:26 PM
49

He's looking for a door to walk out of? Super. Close it behind him and lock the door. You didn't do anything wrong, he's looking for an excuse and fabricated one. Throw. The. Whole. Man. Out.
/r/askFDS13/05/21 08:17 PM
5

This is not 'your' definition of consent. These are the basic tenets of consent. Ditch the 'friends'. These are the people who engage in victim-blaming or playing devils advocate with respect to sexual assault incidents.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 07:55 PM
168

Lions are actually the deadbeat dads of the animal community. The females even feed them. They also aren't monogamous. We definitely don't want to end up like them. 😆 it's the 90/10 relationship from hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 04:19 PM
79

Hold up- did I miss something Elizabeth Warren did to justify being categorized with Kellyann Conway and Abby Shapiro??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 04:10 PM
118

Honey. no. You're 20. This is the time to focus on you and you alone. Get your career/education on the right track. Work on your friendships with other women. Get your style/health to the place YOU WANT. Read the FDS handbook. Investigate therapy. Attention from random men based on your looks is inherently dangerous. Get yourself on the right track so that if you do choose to date in the future, YOU are that high value queen who knows her worth and can adequately judge the worth of a partner.
/r/askFDS13/05/21 01:37 PM
13

Wow! Totally the opposite for me. I find the asexuals and the dads.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 02:02 AM
34

Hell yeah!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 12:50 AM
184

So typical. 50/50 means subsidizing his lifestyle. Can we rescue her?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 12:45 AM
24

Date the ones with more melanin 😏 Problem solved haha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:26 PM
23

That's funny. I actually got more into the over 40 men the more I dated. They could schedule and had cleaner houses. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:17 PM
42

Ok fair haha but seriously, look at the stats especially in the over 40 category! There are about 4 men for every 1 woman on OLD. It's a total sausagefest. And MOST matches for men expire or never respond. You are a RARITY. This doesn't take away from your point at all- in fact, it adds to why women should "speed date." I've met soooo many of those confirmed bachelors (40s, attractive, etc) that take me out for dinner, I quit dating altogether. Like you said, I think they probably want to be sin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:00 PM
90

Sis, I totally appreciate your attitude here but there's not a guy on OLD that is talking to 50 women. The absolute hottest men I know are *at most* going on 3 dates once a month. Also- in the over 30 crowd, the Sad Dinner Guys love dropping a few hundred bucks to take a lady out to a nice dinner because they have no friends and don't want to eat alone. Those guys are the norm on OLD.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 09:46 PM
233

SAME. I'm 100% convinced that the old trope of 'you'll find a man when you're not looking' is a direct result of men wanting to chase a woman who comes across as extraordinarily picky. The irony for Pickmes! The YEARS they spend trying to get male attention could have been spent being a total low effort bitch and it yields the exact same results. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 09:18 PM
31

Great episode. I think Savannah (?) mentioned doing a show on dating as a woman of color and I'd love to hear a podcast on that. Also, I really enjoy reading comments from bi/ lesbian women and their dating experience. It really puts things into perspective for me (hetero). I know FDS is geared more towards cisgender/ hetero relationships, but I'd love to hear more from that community.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 06:23 PM
97

I just feel sorry for them. Cockholm Syndrome for real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 06:17 PM
19

Or, alternatively, the 40 year old that's a workaholic and now experiencing an existential crisis and NEEDS TO FIND A LADY RIGHT NOWWWWW.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 06:15 PM
20

Yeah and it's ALWAYS his adventures. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 06:14 PM
117

Agree. Although usually they admit to their kinks right away, since SeXuAl CoMpAtIbIlItY. "Oh cool, you're into diaper play? That's interesting." Then just pay your tab and ghost his ass. You don't have to pretend to be a PickMe, just keep your opinions to yourself. Men love hearing themselves talk. Disclaimer: I'm middle aged and have dated men over 30 for a long time. Mileage may vary taking my approach.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 06:12 PM
4

The answer is therapy and practice!! It helps to work with a professional on the issues you've identified and engage in PRACTICE. All skills take time to learn and then master, and nothing pushes along the learning trajectory like a good coach/teacher.
/r/askFDS12/05/21 05:50 PM
7

Lady. You have everything you need. Stop with the scarcity mentality over money and companionship. You'll be FINE. In fact, You'll be better than fine. Walk away.
/r/askFDS12/05/21 05:32 PM
39

Bubbles. Do not waste your time trying to figure out someone. They could be meth addicts, dropped as children, have multiple personalities- honestly it's anyone's guess. Unless you are going to school to be paid to be a psychiatrist, invest in hobbies other than armchair psychology. You'll likely never know why someone is an asshole. What matter is YOU. Not them.
/r/askFDS12/05/21 05:27 PM
57

Over 30 edition: "I'm single!" = I'm still legally married and may or may not be separated from my wife "Recently relocated" = definitely lives in a city 500 miles away "Loves adventures" = lonely and can't do his hobbies by himself "I have a yacht/ boat/ jet/ house in Hamptons" = definitely still married, probably lives 500 miles away, maybe can't do hobbies by himself, but at least is self aware enough to know that the only way a woman will give him the time of day is if he finds one that will…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 05:23 PM
269

The best way to be totally non-confrontational is to put on the cool girl persona and ask "so, what kind of porn do you watch?" If you seem totally non judgemental, they will spill their beans. I've had men on the first date admit to having a current FWB, being married, being involved in a trouple, all sorts of BS. If you seem Cool with Anything, they usually don't feel the need to hide it. I recommend it because it weeds them out faster and you can block/ delete rather than wasting your time or…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 05:16 PM
110

Yesssss! Love seeing these values in mainstream media. Can you copy paste text for FDS readers that don't have access to the Post?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 03:50 PM
2

Its remarkable how much time they invest in creating false intimacy just to take you out on the lowest effort date possible. 🙄 What a clown.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:59 AM
115

Ah yes. Pedophilia masquerading as art in film.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 02:07 AM
41

Coming out as a radfem usually comes at a cost: NV people start showing their true colors and leave your life. You have to NOT care about what the pedophiles and scrote apologists think. Speak up and let the garbage take itself out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 12:07 AM
43

Yeah its basically a NVM psychoscrote's playbook (gaslighting, breadcrumbing, grooming) and young women can learn alot from it. It's absolutely disgusting but it should be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 11:03 PM
103

Oh yeah. I cannot WAIT to find a guy so he can build a business while I bangmaid him. 🤡 That's some lifegoals right there!!!! 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 10:31 PM
93

My English prof presented it as a very FDS-esque story. Herbert is extremely charming but it's all a façade of a NV scrote bent on murder, depravity, rape, pedophilia and destruction. 'Beware the man that seems great on the surface' was my takeaway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 10:07 PM
41

Your next set of friends will be so, so much better, OP. Us single ladies are out there and we are the real ride or die.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 10:01 PM
808

The irony is OP lurked on FDS a few days ago and said we were a dumpster fire.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 06:29 PM
6

So much this. Ladies, the men on Reddit complain of the overwhelming number of escorts and OnlyFans ads on OLD CONSTANTLY. Countless posts asking 'where are the women?' The real dudes looking to date try OLD for a few weeks and get off of it. Why would any guy (LV, HV, whatever) stay on an app overrun by prostitution?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 06:22 PM
302

They can hate us all they want. Seeing FDS principles in mainstream subs is fantastic. 🥂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 05:59 PM
37

It means nothing. You don't know anything about him. Men say all kinds of things and do the opposite all the time. Mostly it's word vomit hoping something sticks so you go on another date. It takes a long time to know someone, so take your time, read the Handbook, multidate, and don't get attached.
/r/askFDS11/05/21 05:40 PM
367

Add "not married" for the over 30 crowd. You wouldn't believe how common this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 04:28 PM
151

Only facts. Die mad, scrotes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 03:54 PM
218

And yet here we are, with Libfems defending diaper play and daddy doms meanwhile trolling FDS ladies to lower their expectations of men. Nah, sis, you can keep your scrote harem of pedophiles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 03:51 PM
61

Or still married but supposedly separated. 'His wife is so mean to him!!!' 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 03:11 AM
3

Depends on what they use it for. I have a very good HVW friend that livestreams her sewing projects. I'd say this is about as wholesome and nonsexual as you can get.
/r/askFDS11/05/21 02:43 AM
60

Haha facts
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:24 AM
29

Scrote* FIFY
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:23 AM
306

Don't you know "not serious" means totally willing to risk pregnancy for a guy that bought you a beer?!? /s What a dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:12 AM
98

This is the absolute truth! Among the MANY levels that should be passed before engaging further with these men, you MUST see their STI results. I'm not talking 'oh here's a piece of paper' results. I'm talking log into your healthcare portal and show me. 'Oh that test was more than 2 months ago? Retest please! ' 'Oh you don't have a healthcare provider or online results? Take better care of yourself.' Lots of men also forgo HIV testing (even the rapid test). Make sure you know what panels you wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 10:41 PM
82

Don't let him take up any more room in your brain. Block his number and delete the contact. Who cares if he's hurt? Nobody should ASK for common decency behavior like: "please talk to me" or "I need you to see me sometimes" Throw the whole man away and slam the lid.
/r/askFDS10/05/21 09:51 PM
30

Absolutely correct. The majority of men are completely ignorant to their behavior towards, and other men's behavior towards, women. If there are no consequences to their complete and total lack of care, why would they put the effort into paying attention and acting appropriately? It's completely messed up and these men need to be eliminated from our lives without second chances.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 09:43 PM
85

Simple. OLD is cheaper than hiring a sex worker. Those women expect to get paid. The bar is on the floor and these men know it.
/r/askFDS10/05/21 09:35 PM
4

You can't help someone stay out of an abusive relationship, but you CAN arm them with information and support. Little things like offering an open door should they feel unsafe, or the basic method to file a do not contact order with the local police can be exceptionally helpful. At the end of the day, if she doesn't want that person out of her life, she won't make it so.
/r/askFDS10/05/21 09:27 PM
22

Multiple 'fights' at 4 months?!? Nah, sister. Throw the whole man away. The handbook has lots of fantastic information! I'd recommend reading it top to bottom before dating anyone further.
/r/askFDS10/05/21 09:16 PM
230

Know your worth, especially when negotiating a salary. Understand the marketplace (who is valuable, who needs to shoot their shot and who needs to be picky). Set boundaries immediately in a new position.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 06:04 PM
32

Be the change. Level up, live your best life, never seek male attention or approval. Stay classy. You can't fix people with serious self-esteem issues; they need professional help. But you can be a role model. Also, for your own sake, I'd distance myself from Pickmes generally. They will drop you the second they enter into a NV situationship. Invest in other HV women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 05:47 PM
73

Men are allowed to do whatever they damned well please. That's why we have high standards in the first place. We don't need to attract the low value scrotes. That's THE POINT of having high expectations; trash takes itself out. Fantastic post, OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 05:42 PM
55

Male validation and societal approval. I'm a big fan of spreading FDS/ radfem/ WGTOW messages outside of this sub and in our own personal lives whenever we can. The more HVW friends/ coworkers/ acquaintances Pickmes have in their lives, the more they will see that there is another path. We need to normalize FEMALE validation, high standards, and staying single. Having superstar single older women in my life helped me see that there was a life beyond unhappy marriages. These women offered me a gl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 04:16 PM
114

It makes some women stronger. They drop Scumbag Sam and join us here in FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 04:01 PM
29

I think this is how it goes for most people over 30: ALOT of first dates that go nowhere. Maybe 30% of those make it to a second. Half of those make it to a third. So by the 4th date, you've ruled out most of deal-breaker guys. Men are WAY less picky than women, and if they are looking for a relationship, they want to lock it down. This is exactly why women should stay single and have an abundance mentality. We are still in the vetting stage at this point. But if I were a HVM, I'd absolutely ask…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 03:58 PM
55

Your experience is totally normal. Most of my friends have a rotation that looks like this: the one guy they've gone on a few dates with, a guy they've been on one date with, and a couple of men they are talking to/ planning a first date with. It usually averages out to 1-2 dates a week since most guys won't make it past the first date anyway. Also, in my experience, almost all men will ask you to be exclusive after 3 dates. They know it's hard for them to find dates but easy for you so they are…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 03:30 PM
110

There is a reason (actually, over 1000 of them) that our LGBT sisters fought so hard for gay marriage. If you want a fully fledged partner, you absolutely should consider marriage. That said, many of us- especially the over 30 ladies on this sub- are not marriage minded or looking for a full- fledged partner. However, FDS RULES STILL APPLY. Maximizing your benefit and avoiding NVM/ LVM is essential. For information on just a few of the benefits bestowed upon marriage: https://www.google.com/amp/…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 03:21 PM
653

YES! I love that these values are becoming more and more popularized. FDS sisters hear me out: our views are not extreme. We are simply calling misogyny out. Normalize feminism. Normalize divorcing deadweight Daves. Normalize RAISING expectations.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 12:19 AM
199

Yeah because incest isn't real 🙄 Incest porn is always in the top 5 searches on porn websites. Everything about this is super creepy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 02:57 PM
25

Lead by example only. Don't lecture, don't give them advice. Live your best life and make sure your friends and dates are high quality people. Many women who stay with abusive/ unhealthy men don't have any examples of good, healthy relationships to look up to. Be the change.
/r/askFDS09/05/21 01:04 PM
97

Playing the dumb fox usually works for me. 'Wow, you're ok with middle aged men chasing after barely legal teenagers? That's....creepy.' or 'Huh, the men in my life don't support choking or hitting women.' We need to normalize GOOD, healthy behaviors. Also, my kink is underwear models with washboard abs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 01:59 AM
15

Yes. I'm also a big fan of contacting the "other woman" because usually they do not know. And then peacing out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 01:48 AM
56

HVW nope out of situations like this faster than the scrote can commit another robbery. Block and delete works because we remove ourselves from the equation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 08:16 PM
66

This is straight up PickMe Hall of Fame. Pedophiles = bad Calling out pedophiles = also bad?!?!?! WTF Chrissy, these women are BARELY LEGAL, COME ON. This is not a 35 year old with a 45 year old. That's an age gap. Whatever. But a 50 year old man with a 19 year old is pedoscrote. Let's call it for what it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 08:14 PM
212

I adopted a dog that behaves just like hers! Mine often forgets the reusable bags but he never got sick of me during covid quarantine! We have conversations while pooping and he follows me from room to room. I pack his lunch everyday and he snores alot. He sleeps on the remote and turns the TV on in the middle of the night sometimes. Totally worth it and highly recommend. Oh wait..... she's talking about her husband. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:44 AM
88

Scrote words for "I dont know how to compromise."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:10 AM
51

I see the scrotes downvoting this. Lurkers, if your insecurity is so bad that this video triggers you, you need professional help. Nice video, OP. 🔥
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:06 AM
91

When suddenly schools and daycares were shuttered, and it was dangerous to have non-family-members in your home, the facade of egalitarianism that lots of two-earner families enjoyed suddenly shattered. When it came down to it, lots of men simply decided, unilaterally, that their jobs mattered more, and lots of women were left frantically trying to figure out the rest of their family’s lives. Wow- fantastic article! The libfem fantasy all of us were fed didn't come true and finally, mainstream w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 09:09 PM
52

"But but but BoDy PoSiTiViTy" Its a conspiracy to try to keep us interested in the pumpkin- gutted bottom feeders.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:42 PM
62

Damn though that guy stays busy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:19 PM
14

In today's episode of Low Value Limbo, man calls woman a synonym for infant and is awarded for his efforts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 07:42 PM
287

If HPV didn't exist* needs to be added
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 06:45 PM
81

Then go stick your nuts in hot tar, Todd. Nobody's stopping you. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 06:42 PM
10

I don't believe that saying 'you can send me a car at x time' is too much. Some people drive, some don't, some don't want to be reliant on someone else for their transportation. What matters is that her standards will or will not be met! If not: SEE YA!! It's absolutely okay for ANYONE to expect to have a car or pickup provided without asking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 03:52 PM
66

It's so freeing to stop fighting for basic human decency! A lot of us have fallen into the trap and you're already on the way out. Keep it up!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 03:47 PM
1

It's a possibility! But not really a fair hard-assumption to make.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 03:46 PM
37

Men are allowed to have their preferences too. Maybe he only dates accountants and you're an indie film director. It's not his speed. There's nothing to prove here. 🤷🏻‍♀️ There are a few billion men on this planet; you don't need all of them to like you. Also, more generally: finding a HVM is hard. Finding one that likes you back is also hard. This is why dating is challenging, especially for women who value themselves. The more you level up the fewer men will be in your orbit and thats a good t…
/r/askFDS07/05/21 03:05 PM
11

It wasn't ever said that this is a first date, or second, or third. Early on: no, you should not give up your address to someone who is an unknown. Down the line? Yes. They will know where you live the same way your friends know where you live.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 03:03 PM
23

Cool so does this mean he's going to do come to my sewing group? Or wine night? Yoga class? 😆 He wants to be one of the girls, right? No, of course not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 11:31 AM
97

It should also come with a warning label like alcohol. "Watching these videos leads to ED, depression, and scrotism, thus rendering you incapable of having actual sex with real women."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 04:42 PM
11

HVM don't abandon buildings. They don't walk away from a life they build with their wife. They don't avoid their feelings. They don't let other people clean up their messes. This ain't it, sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 04:40 PM
28

Morning Panda, I've met all of my friends through my hobbies. Serious hobbyists in my two sports are mostly HV so that's made it easier. If you invest in a pastime that requires alot of time, dedication, and discipline, you'll find similar types of people. Also, how nice that all those church goers are weeding themselves out immediately. 😆 Sure makes vetting easier.
/r/askFDS06/05/21 03:07 PM
29

We've all been there. Hugs to you, OP. As a silver lining, your future friends will likely be HVW since you now know how to avoid the toxicity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:59 PM
146

She therapist-zoned you, sis. She used you as a venting bot and unloaded all her problems on you. When you presented solutions, she went on the defense "we don't have problems!" She needs a professional. You need a real friend who will respect your opinions and actively listen to you. Great post OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:54 PM
825

He actually shushes her when she asks "does anyone recognize this man?" Hahahahahaha no we won't shhhhhh for you, nasty pedoscrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 03:11 AM
75

Its already happened in the US! I think someone shared am article here in FDS a few months back about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 03:06 AM
32

I think they tried this in Netherlands? It didn't work. 😆 Women everywhere are on strike.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:28 AM
464

And the huge educational gap between men and women that widens by the year. Not too many queens with PhDs are interested in dating Greg, aged 33, still living at home whose hobbies include binge eating Doritos and fapping.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:27 AM
20

Hey, sis, it's OK to feel ashamed of past actions we've taken. That's what personal growth is all about! You mentioned this was your first NVM experience. I'd chalk this up as naiveté rather than you making poor decisions. We as women are always taught to communicate and give everyone the benefit of the doubt; in a perfect world with kind people, that would work. Oh well, now you know better. You have some experience and you'll do better cutting someone like him off in the future.
/r/askFDS06/05/21 02:24 AM
8

I cannot speak from personal experience, hopefully others can. However, I do have two friends that hold similar values and ideas as you so I'll share their story. When they were younger and applied the strategy you suggest (waiting till marriage), they ended up with men who had a very low sex drive and no appetite whatsoever for pleasing their wives. Round two (post-divorce), both said that they would wait until an engagement to have PIV sex but they do allow men to go down on them if they feel …
/r/askFDS06/05/21 02:11 AM
100

Maybe he preferred Michelin star restaurants instead of park dates 😆 /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 08:12 PM
13

Its NY Post. Can't expect more from right wing 'news'paper.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:39 PM
78

Yes! And FDS gets EASY once you have the perspective that comes with age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:37 PM
254

PSA: If a man asks to visit you in your home at the very initial stages, he is NV or LV REGARDLESS OF HIS EXCUSE. A HVM will NEVER do this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:07 PM
227

And sometimes 'empowerment' really means exploiting yourself for men's pleasure. Don't be fooled by libfem fantasties.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 02:33 PM
102

This is interesting. This means that many women who are in committed relationships are dating men at least 5 years their senior in each age category. Or there are men with harems. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 02:14 PM
272

You need to immediately block and delete men like this. Toxic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 01:44 PM
102

Bet that post made alot of penises sad and they chose to announce it in her DMs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:53 PM
546

Why am I not surprised? Most men say they want kids. Really they want US to have kids and US to raise kids so he can say 'harharhar me a man! Look at my progeny.'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:52 PM
293

Men are the true horror genre as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:51 PM
34

😆 even better
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 03:10 PM
242

He is GROOMING her to become his cuckold wife. Notice she didn't list his age; I bet this scrote is over 40. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 03:09 PM
138

We see this so much in men over 30. They claim to want a marriage and kids; in reality they are workaholics that want the trophy maid (no time to bang) that takes care of his kids so he can level up at work and not be seen as 'the weird single dude that no woman wants.' He wants to SAY he has a woman and kids without actually spending ANY time or effort on them. Kyle, gone are the days where women are ok being ignored. A HVM has work home life balance. He invests in a relationship the way that h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 03:01 PM
33

Oh you wanna go on a hike date? Hmm.... guess you must be a serial killer!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 09:58 PM
196

Absolutely!! We ALL need to normalize and advocate for these standards. Well said.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 07:38 PM
10

You feel guilty because your 'PARTNER' Is making you feel guilty. You are vocalizing your expectations and being met with ambivalence and confusion: that is the problem. A proper partner and friend would hop to it and do what they can to help YOU. Figure out what your standards are. Enforce those standards immediately, consistently, and without wavering. Basically the options are to require big changes or to continue being the breadwinner, caretaker, chef, and housekeeper indefinitely.
/r/askFDS03/05/21 07:11 PM
6

First of all, the apps are awful. I know alot of FDSers use them but I believe it's a Race to the Bottom and so full of NV and ZV men that it's an extremely poor return on investment. You do not need to use apps to date. There are so many great places to meet people in the wild and you can vet much easier than online. First, unlike a profile, you can see them in person so you can more accurately gage attraction. Second, you're usually doing something fun anyway so even if you don't like any of t…
/r/askFDS03/05/21 05:31 PM
4

That's fair! But as long as you dont date married men and have a hobby outside of dating (unlike Carrie), I think you'll be ok.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 03:34 PM
1

YUP. I've been involved off and on the dating scene for 20 years. OLD used to be really really high effort. People spent 3+ hours filling out the Match and eharmony questions. This weeded out all of the low effort people. Then the swiping culture began as companies changed their business models to quantity over quality. That was when the race to the bottom began. Some people think that the companies themselves produce the bots in order to attract more male users. Because men are 60 to 80% of the…
/r/askFDS03/05/21 03:31 PM
4

Oh yes! Good plan.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 03:23 PM
1

Its the worst. If you can, save any information you have about him in case he escalates.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 03:22 PM
23

I actually appreciated this about the show. It focuses on her, in the way FDS does. I think its less blamey and more "how NOT to be a pickme." Yes, Bigs was a total fuckboy but because the show centered on Carries actions and decisions, the show acted as a warning for women. This show cane out when I was in undergrad and it really influenced how I dated. I didn't want to end up like any of the characters (except maybe Samantha, who was almost never involved with a man unless it benefitted her an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 03:02 PM
16

Yikes. This is so scary. I'm glad you didn't meet up with him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:56 PM
40

Carrie needed FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:54 PM
21

I get wanting to do some vetting prior to meeting up but feromones are very real. The vast majority of men you meet up with, you will not find attractive (even if their photos are!). So if you're new to OLD, I'd highly highly recommend meeting men as soon as possible. Find out if they are married (most will be separated LOL you should stay far far away from them) or if they live far away (so many men use OLD when they are on work trips). Honestly I've found OLD is a total waste of time but if yo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:48 PM
0

Yes. Just go on any of the dating subreddits and you'll see thousands of men complaining that all the women who match with them are bots or Only Fans women. Which means it doesn't matter what YOUR profile looks like. Most HVM will see the sex workers on there and say "wow this isn't for me" and leave the apps. Also, it is well documented that most people do not read profiles until they match. Otherwise you're spending lots of time reading profiles of people that will never talk to you. It's more…
/r/askFDS03/05/21 02:42 PM
27

Do a phone call or video chat then, not texting. It is way too easy to filter what you say in written text.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:23 PM
15

We've noticed this ALOT in men over 30 especially. This behavior is not conducive to building a relationship. Keep him around on your rotation and date other men.
/r/askFDS03/05/21 02:19 PM
8

Your experience is normal because OLD is trash. Most HVW aren't using OLD, thats why there is a huge discrepancy between men vs women using the apps. Since most women using the apps are escorts, sex workers, and bots, the men who stayed on OLD were NVM looking for that. Its basic supply and demand of men looking for sex and prostitutes willing to provide it. Of course, there are exceptions- usually people who want to try them for the first time or people that are recently out of a relationship. …
/r/askFDS03/05/21 02:16 PM
62

If he's not asking you out on dates but creates a textationship with you, block delete. Texting should be reserved for making plans for dates only. No conversations. We should only respond to direct questions or plans for dates.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:05 PM
157

'Feel bad for me, I'm all aloooonnnnneeeeee now' In the words of my sister: 'AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. No'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 10:16 PM
22

I won't say 'IT GETS BETTER'. But it DOES get easier. My favorite phrase is 'I'll wait'. After that, you just sit there and stare with raised eyebrows.
/r/askFDS02/05/21 05:40 PM
1

Thank you for bringing this up to our attention. I assumed she used an SEO site, not just Google analytics. Typing something into analytics often yields no results unless it's a trending topic. But apparently thats not the case since the author apologized. I'm shocked since this was published in a peer reviewed journal!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 04:13 PM
8

I assumed she used an SEO site, not just Google analytics. Typing something into analytics often yields no results unless it's a trending topic. But apparently thats not the case since the author apologized. I'm shocked since this was published in a peer reviewed journal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 04:12 PM
82

Engineering school graduate here: This reaction is BOTH unprofessionalism AND sexism. Men havn't been trained to 1) advocate for themselves or 2) respect women My only advice is to get really good at asking 'why was that funny?' 'Can you explain why you're laughing?' 'would you be able to answer my question?' Get them to sit down and shut up and answer the goddam question. Make them say OUT LOUD why they're cackling and refusing to give your time respect. When they can't, sit there and revel in …
/r/askFDS02/05/21 02:14 PM
1

Added!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 03:50 AM
171

Sis, it's hard weeding out all the low effort people in the world. It sounds like you are putting in the vast majority of the work in these relationships. FDS isn't about cultivating female friendships just for their own sake; it's about investing in other women who are like you: growing, improving, leveling up. Keep your standards high for friendships. Drop the low effort people in your life and find some HVW! We are out there!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 01:29 AM
53

Wow! Thanks for sharing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 12:52 AM
214

Yup. Just like 'not everyone has covid.' OK, still going to avoid your nasty plague rat breath, Kevin. I bet there is a huge overlap between the 'not all men' scrotes and the ones that refuse to wear masks. 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 12:49 AM
75

Right? So 163 million times there was planning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 12:01 AM
57

Hi OP! I'm a rural dwelling gal and I've lived in rural communities all over the US. I'm actually working on a post for FDS that's focused on dating in the country, because some of the advice just really does not apply to us. First of all, I'd HIGHLY recommend not actively dating until your divorce has been finalized. Everyone on the dating scene knows to avoid recently divorced people (goes for men and women) for a bunch of reasons. Even standard dating reddit forums preach this as a mantra. No…
/r/askFDS01/05/21 11:23 PM
8

Did you message her by chance? I think she would really enjoy our community here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 09:03 PM
2

Yup. So I guess he wants someone with no friends and no family members that have ever had weddings. So odd.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 04:26 PM
1

A 15 year old maybe. 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 04:01 PM
2

Oh no, I totally agree with you. That's why we didn't say anything about the Trump supporter comment he had on there. That one is fair. I've also been informed that Bumble took away the political affiliation filter for a while.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 04:00 PM
221

This woman has so much internalized hatred and misogyny, I don't even know where to start with this one... I hope the little girl has a HV aunt in her life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 03:45 PM
2

Right. He's telling us "I dont know how to use the in-app filters."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 03:42 PM
1

Yes, exactly which is why we didn't make a comment about that one. Although I believe you can filter by political affiliation on Bumble (I haven't used the apps much), so why even put it on the profile at all?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 03:25 PM
2

THIS 👆🏻 1000%
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 03:21 PM
5

Absolutely. We will add this to our 'emotional intelligence' post that is forthcoming.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:59 PM
16

I don't know anyone that hasn't at least attended ONE wedding that would be age appropriate for him (40+/-).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:52 PM
4

😆 exactly
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:37 PM
5

Hahahaha this right here. 🙇‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:35 PM
13

For several reasons, a few of which you already rightly pointed out. It's super negative. His entire ad is weeding through all the women in hopes that one messages him saying "Pick me! I'm not like the girls with tattoos! I have NEVER been to a wedding!" Regarding guns, your point is totally fair. However, he is swiping in a very rural area of the US where the vast majority of people either farm or hunt and thus, own guns. It's not collecting guns that is the hobby, it's raising or hunting food …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:12 PM
19

He'd prefer that you have no friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 01:53 PM
6

Exactly. Debt-free is challenging because it depends on so many factors. Even beyond 'positive' debt like mortgages, grad school loans or even car payments, medical debt could also set someone back financially. I don't think we should classify someone in the NV category for having had cancer. This isn't rare in the US- in fact, it is the number one cause for bankruptcy. I think the category of having an investment plan, retirement plan, and savings account rules out the vast majority of people w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 01:19 AM
4

Maybe 'no credit card debt'?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:47 PM
6

We excluded this due to mortgages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:47 PM
5

The big caveat for this is people who pursue PhD programs and because of that, we left it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:46 PM
6

Good question and yup absolutely. All the women I know over 30 maintain their own things: homes, cars, etc. Which means you should know BASIC skills (like checking oil and tire pressure) in case of an emergency, minimally. Home maintenance skills will vary widely based on your location which is why we left it fairly vague. As HVW, we should NEVER rely on a romantic partner to do these things for us. We should be capable of taking care of ourselves first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:45 PM
3

Good point!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:42 PM
7

We are creating a post for emotional intelligence, I'll add this one to that list! Great comment. 🌟
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:41 PM
11

We felt like financial literacy was so important, that we broke it down to various components like savings account, retirement account, investment plan. Do you think we should include anything beyond that? Also totally agree regarding the being okay with you helping although I think thats more of an emotional intelligence skill so we will add that into the next post!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 09:19 PM
7

Adding!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 09:17 PM
697

Well I don't know any girls over 40, for starters 🤦🏻‍♀️.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 07:51 PM
10

Exactly. Otherwise, you run the risk of finding the man who lives in a nest of dirty laundry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 07:47 PM
20

Yes exactly. Also, we see so many posts on here about 'a man that seems HV that I've known for a week' and we always want to respond, "you have no idea if he's gone to a dentist in the last decade. Just because he bought you cheesecake doesn't mean shit." Thus, a list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 05:58 PM
15

Adding. Agreed, this is why we added in the qualifying adjective of 'basic.' If you drive, you should know how to check oil and change a tire. It's likely that you pay someone for this work, but in an emergency, you should still know how to do this. Same thing for basic home ownership skills. We aren't talking about being able to plumb in a bathroom or install cabinetry. But he should know how to switch a breaker and use a chaulking gun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 05:51 PM
66

Pranks aren't funny. They are a way for men to write off abuse to women as 'just a joke.'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 05:42 PM
21

We were focusing on skills rather than emotional intelligence or personality traits. Sounds like we need to do a post to include these as well!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 05:14 PM
34

Absolutely. Regarding home ownership: if he doesn't own a home/ condo (or have the money for one himself in a less insane market), he could more easily trap a forever gf. I often see women move into apartments with men in order to save money. A romantic relationship should not be predicated on resource scarcity (i.e. it costs more to be single). This is how women become trapped financially. It is very rare that a woman who owns her home would become trapped in such a situation. Thus, we should a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 05:01 PM
93

Gotta love the lurkers that are downvoting all the comments in here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 04:07 PM
13

This is good. I will edit to include this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 04:02 PM
53

Exactly. And the list may change depending on location, of course. Not everyone has a shingled roof or drywall, so these may not apply. But the ability to do basic monthly maintenance on one's house IS essential.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 03:43 PM
15

Absolutely. Identifying that something is out of their realm of expertise is essential.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 03:39 PM
30

We thought about this one. Some HV people may not have families at all, especially if they are older or have moved far away. Or they may have that one sibling that they have had to set hard boundaries with. It could be complicated with many variables.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 03:38 PM
146

Because Pickmes and NVM feel called out when they read this sub. Also, most men hate women. That's the point of patriarchy after all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 02:11 PM
65

How do these men hold down jobs? Seriously. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 12:51 AM
324

Yup. Same guys that complain about how OLD is full of bots and escorts but THEY are the ones consuming Only Fans and porn sites. THEY ARE THE DEMAND.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 11:06 PM
44

My money is on red lobster 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 10:10 PM
35

The comments are CRAZYTOWN. I think I shouted 'what the hell??' more than once.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 06:10 PM
38

SNAPS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 05:35 PM
81

He either doesn't listen or he doesn't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 12:24 PM
8

Martyrdom syndrome runs deep in raccoons. Especially church going ones that have been brainwashed by the Madonna complex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 12:17 AM
322

I'm more and more convinced men only move their girlfriends in with them to control them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 12:15 AM
7

Girl, who cares what he thinks? Or why he walked away? The question you should be asking yourself in EVERY dating scenario is: does this man add value to my life? Do I like him enough to keep moving forward with him? Does he make ME happy? Is this a future I want for myself? You really want a man that ignores you for days, apologies, and then ignores you again? Yikes.
/r/askFDS28/04/21 11:51 PM
36

The real take away here is what this woman correctly identified as COMMON behavior among scrotes. If 1. Many men do what he did on a regular basis and 2. What he did was a crime, then: what MANY men do on a regular basis is commit sexual crimes. Stay alert, ladies. Don't let -5000 level NVM gaslight you into believing they've changed, that it's acceptable behavior, or that you should be NoN JuDgEmEnTaL. 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 11:30 PM
2

Ultimatums only work if you're willing to follow through with the consequences. In this case, leaving his urine-stained addict ass- and taking the couch with her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 06:34 PM
30

Throw 👏The👏Whole👏Man👏Away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 02:47 PM
11

You told him to leave you alone and go to the police. Do it. File a do not contact order immediately. Bring receipts of your requests to not contact you and the content of the messages he sent/emailed with time stamps. There's no reason whatsoever to NOT get a file going on this harasser. Don't give these men an inch of leeway. Shut it down.
/r/askFDS28/04/21 02:40 PM
7

Has she explained her reasoning to you? I'm curious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 11:46 PM
567

Same scrotes that send messages like this are the ones that join Reddit dating subs to complain about how "nobody matches with meeeeeee..... women never give me a chaaaaaance." Go cry incel tears into your craft beer, Ryan. Nobody wants your dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 10:51 PM
174

This guy isn't even in the same book, let alone on the same page as you. Be wary of your friends that are siding with him. That is some deep seated internalized misogyny if they think a woman with 3 degrees should be dating a directionless, uneducated man with no career. Your future looks bright, don't get dragged down into the mud. P.s. standards can never be too high.
/r/askFDS27/04/21 09:24 PM
19

Sis. You deserve so much better. Everything about this is just sad. Find someone who gives you the attention you deserve.
/r/askFDS27/04/21 09:20 PM
30

If you wanna go super radfem, send it to her directly. Be prepared to lose her as a friend and cause some drama at work for being perceived as a 'homewrecker.' If you want to be sneaky and still rage against the patriarchy, then screenshot it, create an anonymous email account and send it to her. Depending on how she reacts, you may still want to step back from your friendship. You can (and should) also report him on the dating site as being married. In my experience, swingers and poly couples a…
/r/askFDS27/04/21 09:18 PM
122

You've already taken it to management. They didn't take you seriously. Next step is the police. Inform management that you will be filing a formal complaint with your local police department. Then follow through. Don't have a conversation with HR, simply tell them what you will be doing. Document everything no matter how small. If you can, look for other women who have had similar issues with Toad Bob as well and see if they are willing to come forward. Often, once one woman makes a complaint, o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 08:56 PM
25

Because family oriented men generally prioritize this early on in their lives. Despite drastic social changes over the last 20 years, it is still incredibly rare for a man over 40 to marry and have children for the first time. (Of course, there are exceptions- notably men who are widowed young or were unable to have children with their first wife).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 05:04 PM
79

I don't personally know a single woman over 40 like your friend, so I can't speak to her motivations. But I know hundreds of women over 40 and have noticed some trends that are backed by social science data. There is a tipping point in life which happens around 40. By this point, women have already built their lives and they are fabulous. Their financial future is secured, they've already had children if they wanted them, and they have roots in their communities. They aren't bored nor are they l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 04:54 PM
154

People still using OLD are generally on there for validation; aka Pickme Supremes, Escorts, Fuckbois, and Desperados. Don't focus on male attention. Level up and move on from that shitshow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 04:11 PM
10

We've all been in your shoes. Since you can't get out of the Discord responsibilities, do not attempt to manage the situation. YOU aren't being paid enough to 'make it work', that's management's job. Take it up with them. Tell them you are concerned for your safety. This is a lawsuit waiting to happen for your company the second one of these scrotes decides to stalk you. Inform your manager that you will no longer be responding to DMs because you fear for your safety. Take screenshots of all mes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 02:21 AM
85

Exactly. That is what bothers me about the OP. Men who send you low effort messages and then put in more effort only because low effort didn't work = still a LV man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 01:49 AM
329

HVM do not need to be "trained" by us to step up their game. They engage in quality conversations regardless. We don't need to reward or punish. Low effort texts are sent by low effort people, period. Edit: a word
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 12:08 AM
113

First of all, you are not alone. We've dealt with this. Here are some ideas for you: Screenshot the DMs, contact your manager or HR and tell them that you are concerned with men who are singling you out. Make it clear that you are being targeted and harassed. Men are asking you when you will be working; the next step is stalking you. This needs to end, now. Stand. Your. Ground. If you can opt out of participating in the Discord channel altogether, do this. Do not respond to ANY DMs. If men are t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 04:48 PM
342

Just wait until these 'men' turn 30. Wowee does their NV lifestyle catch up to them. It doesn't change, it just becomes more obvious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 04:08 PM
9

Escapism in small doses can be very healthy. I think the fact that you're critical about your consumption means you're on the right track. 💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 04:06 PM
28

I think it depends. I'm imaging my HVF friend who plays Animal Crossing in her she shed. It's relaxing escapism for her. Or my ESL friend who is addicted to Words with Friends, expanding their English vocabulary on the daily with a bit of friendly competition mixed in. I dont think there is anything but joy in gaming for my friends. However, MOST gaming- like ALL male dominated spaces- are full of toxicity, violence, racism, and misogyny. We should actively avoid these spaces for our own well be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 03:54 PM
44

Sis. You've been doing it on your own while you were married to him. The only difference is that now you see it. I've lived alone for a decade. If I can do it, you can do it. Invest in HVW friends. Borrow their husbands as needed. Build roots in your community. Ask for help when you need it. There are HV people out there that will step up. You are not alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 03:17 PM
62

Falling in love is an emotional decision. Getting married is a financial one. Choose wisely, ladies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 03:11 PM
253

Nearly all of the other relationship subs are trash misogyny always giving men the benefit of the doubt. I often have to unstick my eyeballs from rolling them so hard at the comments. BTW, the over 40 sub is way better. There are a number of women commentators in that community that are absolutely ruthless.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 03:11 PM
70

What a fantastic post! For generations, misogyny has shamed us into the role of Pickme. I wish I could tell every young woman that they should not worry about being 'chosen' but instead invest their time into building a life they want to live and trying their best to avoid negative interactions with men. Not dating at all is a fantastic way to do exactly this. Kudos to you, sis. I hope others heed this advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 03:00 PM
2

We are living this dream. The spinster life is a fabulous choice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 02:17 PM
38

The characteristics and actions you attribute to him being HV are not; they are simply baseline respectful. Most LVM and even some NVM will text you first, plan a date, and pay. Keep your standards high!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 01:41 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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