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Vellore992 Archive

View 4 posts and 491 comments by Vellore992 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Or, more likely, she has no idea he's texting other women
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/19 12:15 AM
1

That's why I said many women, not all.
/r/RedPillWomen01/11/19 02:00 AM
1

That's why I said many women, not all. Of course not everyone wants to or is able to chase a man like that, but my point is that for the women who are after these men, education and career is a must. And I don't need to read about those wives, I am one. My husband would not have married me if I didn't hold at least a master's degree.
/r/RedPillWomen31/10/19 07:59 PM
1

Yeah I think you're spot on
/r/RedPillWomen31/10/19 07:57 PM
2

I think having a male explanation of male behavior and thought processes is a good thing. Sure, but we both know their "contribution" rarely stops there! 🤪
/r/RedPillWomen31/10/19 04:13 AM
0

How is that a problem for you? You'll go mad if you spend your time and energy getting outraged at everyone you disagree with.
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/19 07:21 AM
1

It will never cease to confuse me when apparently happily married men come to reddit to spend their spare time discussing the dating habits and desires of a bunch of single women they'll never meet. I just cannot understand what they get out of coming to RPW or writing enormous essays about subs they don't like. I don't read FDS or MGTOW or incel subs because I think they're trash and add nothing but outrage to my life. These guys would do well to ignore the trolls and tend to their own garden.
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/19 07:20 AM
1

It will never cease to confuse me when apparently happily married men come to reddit to spend their spare time discussing the dating habits and desires of a bunch of single women they'll never meet. I just cannot understand what they get out of coming to RPW or writing enormous essays about subs they don't like. I don't read FDS or MGTOW or incel subs because I think they're trash and add nothing but outrage to my life. You guys would do well to ignore the trolls and tend to their own garden.
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/19 07:20 AM
1

Sexually? No. Men will fuck anything if it looks good enough to him. Many men require a certain level of achievement or education from a woman he's serious about, though. My husband's circle of friends are all wealthy and educated, and none of them would ever consider marrying a girl with a simple job. All of the wives in that circle have or have had serious, prestigious careers. They'll gladly fuck the waitress, but there's no way in hell that girl is going home to meet the family.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/19 04:23 PM
1

It's blindingly obvious that you have never interacted with the upper classes. No one here cares what you personally want, but it is just a fact the upper class men (who are very desirable to many of the women here) care deeply about the career and education of their partners.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/19 04:17 PM
1

Withholding sex to get your way is not an RPW strategy
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/19 03:43 PM
1

I think you're lost
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/19 03:38 PM
4

I'm not defensive, I'm just pointing out an untruth that keeps getting repeated here.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/19 03:24 PM
6

Yeah. My first was some high school nobody. I broke up with him when I left for college I never think of him in any way, positive or negative. You'll bond with the people you click hard with, and that can be your first or your 50th. My experience is that in the real world (outside of the heavily religious) high value, normal men don't give a toss about whether they're your first or not. As long as you're giving them what they need from a partner, they'll stick around. This obsession with numbers…
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/19 06:44 AM
8

You'll never bond with anyone the way you bond with your first. That just isn't true, and I'm speaking from first hand experience. I've heard from plenty of other women in here say the same. Unless you're a woman and you've experienced bonding first hand, you're not in the position to tell us how this works.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/19 05:53 AM
1

This sub isn't for men to ask advice
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/19 09:45 PM
1

As girlwithabike said, not all men would consider that a shit test.
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/19 03:02 AM
2

Good thing she's not trying to date "most men" then
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 10:39 PM
46

But I feel like I should be a good wife and stick it out. But I'm 21!! You're not his wife. Stop behaving like one for him when you're not getting what you need in return. This is not your responsibility. You say you're both "traditional", there is absolutely nothing traditional about performing wife duties for a long distance boyfriend with no real commitment. And when I've tried to raise these issues before, he says things like, "Well that sucks. You should know I'm trying harder than anyone e…
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 09:50 PM
3

No, I don't think there's a tidy system of cognates like you're looking for. There are just things that are important to most women and things that are important to most men.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 09:28 PM
12

Admiration
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 09:09 PM
2

I don't think there's something fundamentally wrong with her boyfriend. Nor do I. But OP obviously needs/wants more direction than he's giving. He'd be better suited to a woman who wants something more balanced. This level of passivity is not necessary to have a healthy RP relationship. Not at all. And it's certainly not reflective of my own relationship. But I do believe it's a personal thing and there's nothing wrong with her wanting this. She probably could change her mindset temporarily, but…
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 07:04 AM
1

I think you've misunderstood /u/girlwithabike's post. We defer to others on a regular basis: to bosses at work, to teachers in school, to those with more knowledge and experiences than we have or those who take on responsibilities we do not want. A doormat is a woman who will make herself weak to assuage the ego of a weak man. Tell me where in the OP she describes herself behaving as a doormat. Doormats allow themselves to be walked over. This man isn't making decisions at all, how could she pos…
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 03:52 AM
1

I'd have a phone call with him, or even better meet with him in person if possible to discuss this. If he's telling the truth about how busy he is, and he may well be, then you need to figure out if you're ok with that kind of sporadic contact. Maybe it's a particularly busy time for him and will be settling down soon, but maybe this is just what his life looks like and you'll always be wanting more. Before you talk to him, have a clear idea of what you would be satisfied with (eg texts once a d…
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 02:55 AM
2

She's not being a doormat, she's being passive. Since you're taking the time to read these posts, perhaps you've read the side bar where it's made clear that male participants without a TRP posting history aren't welcome here. Your foreveralone posts don't qualify you to school RPW on what is and is not submission.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 02:46 AM
15

We're not catering to "modern man". We're catering to one individual man who has proven to be worth it. Every other man could disappear for all I care.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 02:44 AM
1

I sort of told him that unless he had a REALLY good excuse, that things were over because I just wouldn’t be able to handle him disappearing on me all the time. Oh yeah? How did he take that? Even if it doesn’t work out, he showed me that I can move on if I find the right person. Exactly! One thing I always try to keep in mind here is just how many men post. Quite often I'll see a really weird reply from what I assume is a woman, but when I have a look at their post history it's all MGTOW and ga…
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 02:25 AM
8

You're right that there's a difference between passive and submissive, and I agree that OP should work on communicating herself more clearly. I don't think that being passive is I always a negative thing though, or that only abusive men like passive women. It doesn't sound like she wants him to make every little decision for her, but there are plenty of good men who would gladly take the lead on the things she is complaining about.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 01:53 AM
5

This is passive in and of itself. Have preferences! Have opinions! Make decisions! He doesn't need to make daily decisions for you, and he's probably also frustrated that you're so passive. It sounds like she wants to be the passive one in the relationship though. There's nothing wrong with that, and plenty of men enjoy that in a woman.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 01:09 AM
4

Oh? What is submission and deference then if not following a decisive man who can lead?
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 01:06 AM
9

It's not protective of OP, it's how things play out in the real world. OP is a deferential, submissive woman who wants a leader. Having to train that into a man is going to kill whatever sexual attraction she does have for him. It's not pretty, but it's an RP truth. She's in her prime right now, she should be leveraging that to find the right man for her, not trying to change a boyfriend who is missing a trait that is hugely important to her.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 01:02 AM
1

Thanks. And yeah I think there's more than a little jealousy coloring the responses here. Try not to get ahead of yourself of course, but I remember your old posts and hanging on to your ex the way you did was very unhealthy (but I'm sure you know that). Moving on and dating and getting excited about new people is a good thing, just don't put all your eggs in a basket that doesn't yet exist 😉
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 12:46 AM
1

There's a lot of tall poppy syndrome going on in this thread. Enjoy the courtship and good luck. I hope it works out for you.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 12:22 AM
4

This is all beside the point. She came here for advice gaining weight. Not your opinion on what her weight should be.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 12:06 AM
13

Yes, far better to continue in a relationship that makes her unhappy and attempt to mold her man into someone she's actually into. This is a one way ticket to resentment and a dead bedroom.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/19 12:05 AM
7

How do you know whether or not she looks like a boy? She didn't ask for input on her body, she asked for help gaining weight.
/r/RedPillWomen23/10/19 10:31 PM
1

She's 20 years old, she shouldn't have to teach her boyfriend how to make a decision. Sure, it's not his fault, but there are plenty of men out there who this comes more naturally to, and it would be foolish of her to waste years of her youth hoping she can change him into someone else.
/r/RedPillWomen23/10/19 10:29 PM
4

You're incompatible, and at 20 you have plenty of time to find someone who's a better fit. Chalk it up to a learning experience, and when you start dating again include these traits in your vetting. Good luck!
/r/RedPillWomen23/10/19 10:26 PM
1

/r/femaledatingstrategy
/r/RedPillWomen23/10/19 10:35 AM
16

Why on earth are you letting a boyfriend tell you when to do his laundry?
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/19 08:36 PM
10

How did he get to the age of 56 without having married or had any children? Is it something he never wanted? Why has his mind suddenly changed now? Did he perhaps want a family but was unable to find/maintain a relationship? This would be a big red flag for me.
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/19 11:29 PM
1

When you enrolled in your university program there did you and your boyfriend discuss this? Because if he was on board with that it certainly sounds like you were both planning on staying close to your family for a while. Did you have any kind of agreement on how long you'd stay there?
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 01:49 AM
8

She's 21 and a girlfriend. As much as she might love him now, the truth is that this probably isn't her life partner. Boyfriends come and go, especially ones that move interstate while you're grieving and enrolled in college. Her dad and brother will be her family forever.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 01:47 AM
2

Break up with your bf and meet new people. Bradley is not the last crush you'll ever have.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/19 10:26 PM
19

I think the women here are interested in men they're actually attracted to, not awkward virgins with no social skills. Football isn't preparing men for awesome foreplay but Xbox sure is Lol you heard it here girls
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/19 10:24 PM
3

a man loves the woman herself, a woman loves the man for what he can do for her and how he makes her feel What is "herself" if not the things she does or the way she makes people around her feel?
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/19 01:54 AM
1

Yes that's nice, but it has nothing do with what I'm taking about, which is men who value formal credentials as a social marker.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/19 01:47 AM
7

A networking event/party for our professional industry. Turns out we were in the same extended social circle but hadn't properly met yet. He zeroed in on me at the bar and started chatting, we ended up talking all night. He took me out for dinner the next night, and we were a couple shortly after that. He pursued me pretty hard.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/19 01:46 AM
4

lol yes that too
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 09:00 PM
3

There are plenty of men who require formal education. My husband is one of them.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 07:48 PM
6

the fact of the matter is that that is something that is heavily if not entirely bred in that culture. Of course it's cultural. I never said otherwise. The notion of red pill is to address things that are universal across cultures. No, it's not. Cultural norms are very relevant to red pill. By your own admittance, this is something endemic of a very small subset of society. I wouldn't frame this as a general truth that applies to the majority of the populace. I admit that my circles are at the m…
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 06:45 PM
0

We can't answer that for you. It's between you two and if he's agreed to it, then he's agreed to it. He's a grown man, he's capable of making these decisions for himself.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 06:31 PM
1

That's nice. Thanks for sharing your personal preference with us.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 06:19 PM
5

Source: Top 1% male. 🙄
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 05:25 PM
5

She didn't say it's a choice. She said it's a thing that happens to men and makes them unattractive.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 05:17 PM
8

If a women is well read, is culturally middle class and intelligent without a degree it won't hold her back on the dating market. Among some men, yes. Among the ones I know, no.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 05:01 PM
2

Agreed
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 04:37 PM
8

I disagree that of the educated, successful men only a minority care about a degree. My circle is perhaps at the more extreme end of that, and a PhD would be overkill for many, but I maintain that most successful men would prefer an accomplished woman. I'm glad you found a man it didn't matter for.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 04:37 PM
25

I'm not talking about every single rich man ever. As a general rule in the circles I interact with (UMC to UC, intellectual, "old money" families) formal education is highly regarded and an absolute necessity for marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 03:53 PM
14

However, the selling point is not the degree, it's what the degree implies For some people like yourself, yes. But culturally among certain circles a degree does mean something in its own right. The men I'm talking about are concerned with the prestige and social status that can't be attained without a degree. The best man from our wedding goes so far as only dating women from a certain calibre of grad school. You might think it's pointless, but we're all from intellectual families with "old mon…
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 03:46 PM
35

Yep exactly. Men don't like to admit this, but they often have their own dual mating strategy not dissimilar to AF/BB. My husband had his fun with the simple cuties, but when he started looking for a wife his priorities and standards were very different.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 02:39 PM
168

I often see men in here claiming that education/career means nothing to men and that we shouldn't waste our time on that pesky PhD because it just gets in the way. It may not make a woman more sexually attractive, but in gaining commitment from a certain (valuable) type of man it has a huge impact. My husband and his friends are all high status, educated men, and while they'll gladly have a fling with the cute waitress, when they marry it is always with an educated, successful woman. If these me…
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 02:23 PM
1

Your reply is basicly what's wrong with women in general you only care about your side, fk the other side. That's sounds like the female version of mgtow. Much like TRP then? That men and women are different and often have conflicting sexual strategies is the red pill. Why do you think we're here?
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 11:38 AM
1

I said nothing of the sort, don't put words in my mouth please. I simply said that a few hours of structured socialization is very different to being constantly immersed in a social system of other kids. And that is true.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/19 03:00 PM
1

A few hours a week of sports doesn't socialize a child like full time immersive schooling does
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/19 01:58 PM
2

Agreed
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 08:46 PM
2

If you're not religious, where are you planning on finding men who are willing to marry a woman before he's slept with her?
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 08:25 PM
1

Honestly, I'd be out. There's nothing innocent about this.
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 08:24 PM
1

And then what? He does it in private. If he's not stupid he already knows she wouldn't want him sending this girl pics. What is telling him this going to achieve? Having a conversation about it isn't going to change the fact that he's the kind of guy who flirts with insta girls.
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 08:23 PM
1

Are you engaged to your boyfriend? I would strongly recommend not planning your career, or lack of a career around a boyfriend. What if things don't work out between you? What if you find out you can't have children? Until you're married, or at the very least engaged, you can't make the assumption that this man will always be there to support you. Even then, things change and things go wrong. Don't put all your eggs in this basket, especially while there's still so many unknowns. I'm a stay at h…
/r/RedPillWomen20/08/19 03:13 AM
1

I usually hate ultimatums but this is ridiculous. You say there were a few good years, do you have any idea what changed? Was it a sudden thing in him?
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/19 12:42 AM
1

With two weeks to go, you should be focusing your energy on studying for that test, not thinking of alternatives. If you do fail you'll have plenty of time to think of other paths, but since you're on a deadline and seem to really want this, I'd just do one thing at a time. Get a tutor, do practice exams, and let your SO help if he's knowledgeable in that area. Good luck.
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/19 04:34 AM
1

Did I not say that it has nothing to do with intimidation?
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/19 05:21 AM
1

Do you think it's a good idea to "hide" your academic achievements from men so that you don't come off as emasculating or intimidating? No. Good, strong men are not intimidated by achievement. You don't want the ones who are. This is not to say that men are sexually attracted to achievement either, though. For some men it will be a bonus - my husband loved that I was educated and had a career because it meant that I slotted seamlessly into his family and social circles, and that we could talk at…
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/19 10:16 AM
1

Keeping sex for marriage is going to rule out just about every western, non religious man on the market.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/19 09:55 AM
1

Your method works fine if you're not hoping to marry one day, but it sounds like OP auditioning for the role of wife, not committed girlfriend.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/19 08:02 AM
1

As a girlfriend, you bring joy and fun to his life by being present and pleasant to be around. You get to know him and figure out if you're compatible for something more. That's about it. You each maintain your own life and home and wellbeing, and get to enjoy each other in your spare time. Don't move in with him, don't do chores for him, don't change your life for him. And vice versa. He's an addition to your life at this stage. When I got married, it meant so much because after getting to know…
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/19 04:34 AM
1

Oh it's a woman? Weird.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 11:12 PM
1

Why do you have such an issue with women talking to each other and sharing advice?
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 10:59 PM
1

This is a very interesting take on it. I'm inclined to agree with you.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 09:27 PM
5

😘
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 09:17 PM
1

Depends if it's a "vetting for marriage" boyfriend, or a "forever boyfriend". Of course older people date for any number of reasons, and while I agree it sounds juvenile, boyfriend is the best term we have for that. The reason it sounds juvenile is because dating and boyfriends are typically a young woman's game, and women of status end up a wife before too long.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 05:47 AM
1

Yes. I read it as a cheeky warning about a different type of player who's not always immediately recognizable as one. Very useful for women (especially young, inexperienced ones) who want to avoid players.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 12:55 AM
1

The whole point of the Dylan post was that he's misrepresenting himself. A young woman who's looking for a sensitive romantic dude could easily fall for Dylan the player-in-disguise. I know plenty of women who did in my college days. I don't think anyone was saying he's "bad". It was just a tongue in cheek "Hey, look out for this one, girls. He might not be what he seems."
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 12:50 AM
1

Go on a few more dates and you'll find yourself drawn more to one than the other. Unless you've discussed exclusivity then you're not leading anyone on. This is normal dating.
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/19 01:48 AM
1

Oh you'll be deleted and banned as soon as the mods see this. I'm just killing time for now.
/r/RedPillWomen12/07/19 11:17 PM
1

Shame you couldn't get some English lessons with all that money
/r/RedPillWomen12/07/19 11:11 PM
1

if I couldn't be with a man I actually wanted
/r/RedPillWomen12/07/19 11:07 PM
1

Like I said in the last polygamy post, if I was in love with a man there is no way in hell I'd consider it. If it was a purely financial arrangement and he had enough money to support us all and I couldn't be with a man I actually wanted, sure. There wouldn't be any love there, though.
/r/RedPillWomen12/07/19 10:50 PM
1

I won't define love for you because I can tell you're deliberately trying to sidetrack the conversation and I have no interest in doing that with you.
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/19 09:32 PM
1

If you're not attracted to him, next. I'd personally be more weirded out by the weird conversation about orgasms, but social skills are especially important to me.
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/19 06:17 AM
1

Yeah you're overthinking it and making an error that is very common to the male posters here. You can theorize all you like about the whys and hows, but you need to remember that essential to a good relationship is both parties feeling happy. Yes, that includes the woman. My assertion is that women today who are romantically in love with their men are typically not happy in an arrangement that involves non-monogamy. I'm not going to define love for you, I don't want to get side tracked and that …
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/19 01:32 AM
1

I'm talking about romantic love. Polygamy works just fine in cultures where marriage is a more pragmatic institution, separate to infatuation and romance. Many cultures worked and still work just fine treating marriage in this way. But for those of us living in the west in modern times, the norm is to develop a romantic attraction to someone and choose a spouse based largely on your feelings for them. Women want men who arouse feelings of romance and lust and attachment, and for most women those…
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/19 12:32 AM
1

Rather than immediately downvoting anyone who disagrees with you, why don't you engage and discuss?
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/19 11:17 PM
1

Polygamy worked in cultures where people didn't marry for love. If I married for a provider I wouldn't care if he took extra wives, as long as I was still looked after. But I married for love, and this is an entirely different game. If my husband wanted to take another wife, I'd be absolutely devastated and I think almost all women would feel the same.
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/19 10:56 PM
1

I did Your bf's relationship with his mother is very much up to him to manage and I would advise against getting at all involved with that. As for your own relationship with her, it's quite easy to simply smile and nod or avoid the topics you disagree on. Her views on feminism are her own, there's no point trying to engage on that. I'm sure there's plenty of other things you can connect with her over. My MIL legit believes in witchcraft, and loves to talk about it to me. For the sake of harmony …
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/19 08:03 AM
1

As soon as I became pregnant he exited the situation and decided he did not want to be a part of our lives And this is why we don't have children out of wedlock. Ever.
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/19 08:01 AM
1

It is possible to set boundaries without coming across as catty.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/19 05:15 AM
1

And it's likely in OP's and her bf's best interests to have a mature and civil with the mother. "I prefer not to receive advice I did not ask for" just comes across as catty and is going to cause unnecessary friction.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/19 03:49 AM
1

This sub is about finding a man worth following, and then doing that. Addictions just muddy things far too much. Even Laura Doyle in The Surrendered Wife says to never invest in or submit to any kind of addict.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/19 07:10 AM
1

You should leave. Find a man with his life together and no addictions. This isn't going anywhere good.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/19 05:51 AM
1

No one cares. Not relevant for this sub.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/19 12:58 PM
1

If he likes you enough to make you his girlfriend, he'll make that known. 3 months is plenty of time for him to decide if you deserve the girlfriend label, if he's not trying to make you his yet I doubt he ever will. My husband announced that we were a couple after knowing one another a week or two. I couldn't imagine hanging around with a guy (and sleeping with him) for 3 months without being his girlfriend.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/19 02:08 AM
18

You're in college, you're old enough to think long and hard about whether marriage is something you want for your future. You don't need to get married tomorrow, but you do need to start thinking about what your goals are. Regardless, if you move in with this man now and start behaving like the wifey he wants you to, there's no going back. You're agreeing to his expectation of having a live in wife without any commitment or financial support on his end, and that if how your relationship will pla…
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/19 03:23 AM
25

You're on the right track - there's nothing to be gained by performing wife duties for a boyfriend. Especially one who's made it clear he doesn't want to marry you. A bigger question here is why are you continuing a relationship with a man who is against marriage when it seems like it's something you value? It seems like he wants all of the benefits of a traditional arrangement, without the actual tradition of marriage. He's just picking and choosing the bits of tradition that benefit him. I wou…
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/19 03:12 AM
2

This is obviously a case where the men simply don't understand women and the advice is for the good of the OPs partner not her. Seems like a theme on this sub lately lol
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/19 10:15 PM
1

Sure, you can make up a reason for it if you like. My point is that the reason, or lack of a reason, doesn't matter. If she feels an aversion to dating a bisexual man, then she shouldn't date a bisexual man. Likewise, I wouldn't encourage a man who felt a strong aversion to sluts/prostitutes/redheads to just get over it and ~be logical~
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/19 02:49 AM
1

Yeah, we can invent reasons to justify anything we feel a natural aversion to (which is what the n-count/pair bonding claims serve as imo), but this guy seems to be missing the point that attraction does not need to have a logical basis, but it does need to be there. You can't make a woman feel attraction to a bisexual man just because "logically it shouldn't matter". There's no "should" in attraction. Attraction comes from the animal brain and we can't (and shouldn't attempt to) talk ourselves …
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/19 02:47 AM
3

It makes a difference to his "captaining" because it makes him unattractive and attraction is absolutely critical for a good relationship. If a woman is turned off by her man there is no way she'll ever respect him. There's no being logical or looking past this. Once she knows his history the damage is already done.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/19 12:51 AM
3

Male homosexuality is disgusting to women in the same way that prostitution is disgusting to men. It makes no difference at all whether that disgust is logical or not, the point is that most women will be viscerally turned off upon learning that a man has had gay sex. Your advice to OP to be '"logical" about it and get over it is wrong. Attraction is prerational and cannot be negotiated. RP 101. If it turns her off, then it turns her off and she should not continue the relationship. Your advice …
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/19 10:24 PM
5

Are you here to give advice or to moralize?
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/19 06:58 PM
10

You don't get it. Male homosexuality is unattractive to women in a way that female homosexuality is not. I have nothing against gay men, I would just never be attracted to one.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/19 06:14 PM
–

Reverse the genders and imagine it's a man who's just discovered that his gf used to be a prostitute, or something equally disgusting to men. Would you also tell him to just forget about it? For almost all women, the idea of your man having had a dick inside him is just viscerally disgusting and not something that he could recover attraction from. Attraction can't be negotiated, and for most women, having had gay sex is very unattractive.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/19 11:12 AM
1

Reverse the genders and imagine it's a man who's just discovered that his gf used to be a prostitute, or something equally disgusting to men. Would you also tell him to just forget about it? For almost all women, the idea of your man having had a dick inside him is just viscerally disgusting and not something that he could recover attraction from.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/19 05:37 AM
2

I don't care about Estonia. If you're talking about the states, then attach stats (not anecdotes) from the states.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/19 12:46 PM
2

Reality dictates that most rapists in fact do not escape conviction False
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/19 03:44 AM
1

lol
/r/RedPillWomen13/05/19 03:42 AM
1

Marriage is simple to escape, or men are getting brutally divorce raped when they leave. Which is it?
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/19 10:50 PM
3

So being realistic, is there any concrete reason to get married as a woman . Any man who... for men... for a man... I think you've mistaken this sub for TRP or MGTOW. She's not asking for a list reasons for men to avoid marriage. Perhaps marriage wasn't a good choice for you, but this isn't the place or the thread to soap-box about it.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/19 10:48 PM
2

You're welcome :)
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/19 10:45 PM
2

Op is looking for a reason why he should marry her. Why it would be beneficial to him. You've misread the OP. This is not at all what she's asking.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/19 10:45 PM
1

a bunch of good reasons
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/19 05:11 AM
1

Ok, play dumb then /u/raininginafrica. You post your drivel all over every relationship sub and you're either a troll or very unwell. If it's the latter, please get some help.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/19 09:10 AM
1

You again 🙄
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/19 08:33 AM
4

He's very cuddly afterwards, he tells me I'm the first girl he's cuddled with throughout the whole night and also the first he didn't have sex with by the second date, and hinted at exclusivity (he says he went to the club and just wanted to go home the whole night because all the girls there weren't me, and checked to see if I was still seeing anyone else, which I wasn't). He takes me out before I spend the night and again the next day, and he did a really sweet gesture Oh honey... Men will say…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 05:15 AM
1

I know a few lawyers who have managed this just fine. It's a lot of work, of course, but it's certainly possible.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 04:08 AM
1

Ouch yeah that is a lot! I would actually look at ketamine before going the TMS route. I just googled and it's approved for clinical use in the UK, and about £200 per infusion. The results around ketamine for depression have been very, very positive. Good luck!
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 01:18 AM
1

Wow I actually have experience in this. Not personally, but I ran some of the trials for TMS and TDCS when I was a grad student. I would honestly say go for it. It didn't help everyone we tested, but it did help most and the side effects were close to nil. Certainly less side effects than common anti-depressants and the results were very promising. As long as it's being administered by a reputable, experienced clinic, I don't think you've got anything to lose. One thing we did find was that the …
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/19 06:11 AM
1

So you got friendzoned by some girl and come here to write up your fantasy? Ew. Go away.
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/19 02:36 AM
1

Yikes. A case study on why not to marry as an 18 year old virgin. Has it been this way since the beginning of your relationship? Did you wait for marriage before having sex? If this is the norm then I'm not sure that much will change. Have you raised this with him?
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/19 02:04 AM
1

Words are cheap. Don't go down this road of living together full time, it's almost impossible to undo. Just tell him you don't want to cohabit before you're engaged.
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/19 10:41 PM
1

Yep absolutely. What motivation does he have to propose to you if he's already got a live in wifey? We see this in here all the time. Women 5 years into a relationship wondering if he's ever going to pop the question, and it's almost always because they're living together and he's become comfortable with the arrangement.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 11:26 PM
10

I think that moving in with him before engagement is much more worrying than having sex with him
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 11:19 PM
1

So anecdotes, then. Same for me.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 09:41 PM
2

The main reason why they aren't in their children's lives is because they were unjustly forced out. This is your speculation and that's fine. I disagree. I know countless families where the father took off and restarted with another family, dropping in for the occasional birthday before disappearing again. My husband and his brothers grew up this way. My father in law is one of many, many men who abandoned their children because they simply didn't want to be involved anymore. Who initiates divor…
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 06:14 AM
1

I'd say that the absent father plays a much bigger role in creating these types of people than hypergamy. When a boy is abandoned by his father it's very difficult to recover from that. Boys need a healthy male influence, whether or not their parents are still together.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 02:10 AM
6

If you read between the lines, carefully, of various accounts of rape, what you find is beta males. Men who women do not find attractive. Men for whom sexual attention from women is scarce. Do you have numbers to back this up or are you speaking anecdotally? Because most of my experience with sexual assault and rape occured when I was at a particular college that is now infamous for it. A disgusting number of my female colleagues were assaulted while I was there, and it was almost always by the …
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 11:36 PM
8

Then get yourself a job and have this discussion with your husband when you have one. Not all men want or can support a SAHW. For heaven's sake don't listen to strange "TRP coaches" online. At all.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/19 10:21 PM
8

Why are you listening to a "TRP coach"? Are you married? These decisions are between you and your husband only.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/19 10:00 PM
6

You say that men have it worse because they can't be a house husband without judgement, then you turn around and shame OP for not wanting to pursue her career after having children. Which is it?
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/19 08:18 AM
4

I agree that you should have your own social life, but I'll go against the grain here and say that no, I wouldn't be ok if my husband was texting other women for just daily chit chat things. Truly platonic male-female relationships are almost unheard of, and it is way too easy for "supportive friend" to turn into that guilty crush. When you do eventually have an argument or you do something to upset him, do you really want him turning to another woman to vent? My husband has a couple of women th…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 07:23 AM
4

There's a difference between "asking for commitment" (which I don't think anyone does anyway) and being clear about what your boundaries and requirements are. "I don't have casual sex" is a statement about yourself, it's not asking for commitment. Likewise, asking where you stand in a new relationship (ie "the talk") if approached correctly is just a question, it's not asking for commitment. There's nothing wrong with this, it's how regular adults interact.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/19 10:53 PM
2

You're wrong. Feminism is by definition the advocacy for women's rights. Whether or not the term feminism had been coined at the time is irrelevant. The suffragettes were feminist. I'm sure cavemen didn't refer to themselves as cavemen - doesn't mean they weren't.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/19 10:45 PM
3

So find other friends? You have an excuse for everything, I can see why he's frustrated.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/19 07:55 PM
1

Do you have a network of female friends?
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/19 09:40 AM
2

We're all hypergamous, and that's fine. It can be very useful in the dating and vetting phases of a relationship, and the fact that you're thinking of other men at just a year in is a warning sign. It sounds like you're incompatible with this guy, attraction is such an important part of the relationship, and if you're not feeling it now that's unlikely to change.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/19 06:04 PM
7

Hypergamy is also helpful in the vetting stage of a relationship, which OP is. Once you've committed to a man, ie engaged to him, it's purely destructive, but as a 20 year old who's just dating it should not be ignored.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/19 05:55 PM
29

Our status among our peers changed immediately and drastically upon getting married. It was actually quite shocking the increase in respect we both experienced at work, from our families, from our friends, etc.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 06:30 AM
1

No idea who this guy is or where he's getting his numbers from. I highly, highly doubt it.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 03:05 AM
8

Uh, this changes everything and should have been in your OP. You don't get invited to these things because you're a plate. Why are you asking married and marriage minded women advice on being a FWB?
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/19 04:44 AM
3

A boy's night? Sure. Another woman's birthday party? Hell no. In my circle, partners are always invited to any co-ed events. Her not inviting you and him not challenging that reads super sus to me.
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/19 01:24 AM
16

Next
/r/RedPillWomen20/03/19 01:18 PM
3

I'm with you. A lot of relationship skills come from first-hand experience, not reading about them online. There's a big difference between going into a relationship as a young woman knowing he's likely not your future husband, and just slutting around town. The former will do you a lot of good, the latter not so much! Still choose carefully, vet well, and treat yourself with respect, and you'll do just fine.
/r/RedPillWomen19/03/19 11:12 PM
1

Telling you there's a problem but refusing to talk about solutions is awful behavior. Does he act like this with any other issues in the relationship? Are you able to solve other problems together in a respectful way? How long has sex been an issue? Did anything else significant happen around this time? What's his porn use like?
/r/RedPillWomen19/03/19 01:03 AM
7

Your desire for monogamy is natural and something you should listen to. A normal woman will never be happy in a non-monogamous arrangement, so unless you're an extreme outlier, which you're not, then there's your answer.
/r/RedPillWomen17/03/19 09:52 PM
6

There's a difference between looking after your self-interest and being guilty of something. Yes, you could say that it's "selfish" to want monogamy, but so too is it selfish for a man to want non-monogamy. Neither of these are worth feeling guilty over, just pursue men who are also looking for monogamy and you'll be fine. In my experience, non-monogamy is always a bad deal for the woman involved, and as this sub is focused on the female sexual strategy, I doubt you'll find many women in here re…
/r/RedPillWomen17/03/19 09:09 PM
6

Would you say that men from different backgrounds have different expectations of their partners and choose differently? In my experience, yes. Men who are raised UC are exposed to these types of people for their entire lives and this is the norm for them. "Average" is not acceptable to them. Self made men who grew up modestly are far more forgiving I believe. I don't see this as a downside, personally. My husband's standards have kept me on my toes and helped drive me into the best version of my…
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/19 03:04 AM
7

You're welcome. I have a PhD in physics, and also have studied fine art and design. We met through mutual friends at a party. They'd been trying to set us up for months and when we finally got together things moved pretty quickly. I think the biggest misconception with dating in this class is that these men are happy to have "kept women" at home just living a luxurious life. My husband expects great things from me, and while I no longer work for money the minute I start to slack off he's on my b…
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/19 01:24 AM
2

I thought so too! There are cases where surrendering is a bad idea, but "my husband is taking me on an extravagant holiday and I don't want his kids there" is not one of them!
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 11:18 PM
4

Yes you're absolutely right they do
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 10:41 PM
1

SMV and RMV are different things.
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 10:41 PM
8

It's a class thing. UMC/UC men tend to end up with educated women. You'll very rarely see a man from old money marrying a child care worker. My husband comes from this world, and if I didn't hold at least a master's degree I wouldn't have been considered a serious option for marriage. All of his brothers and friends are married to educated women. The men in TRP who say that education doesn't affect your SMV are correct, but there is a large demographic of very desirable men for whom a prestigiou…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 10:39 PM
3

Hah yes I was about to say the same thing. It's amazing how much a little Botox makes me look happier and more relaxed (as well as younger).
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 02:42 AM
68

Thank you. Every time I see a woman in there saying "I'm 32 but it's ok because I'm always mistaken for a teenager" I roll my eyes.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:06 AM
23

I disagree with this tactic for the simple reason that there are certain men who are not wanting to settle down, no matter how well a woman girl-games him. That's no one's fault, it just isn't what he's after. I've always used a different method and it's worked out perfectly for me. Go on dates, meet these men, and don't sleep with them immediately (no matter how badly you might want to). The men who are looking only for sex quickly drop off the radar, leaving you with men who are likely at leas…
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:00 AM
7

Surrendering to your husband doesn't mean only following him when you happen to like his decisions. Do you want him to lead? Well this is what it looks like. Go on the holiday, and be grateful that you're in a position to travel so often, and that your future husband is so invested in his family. If you want a trip alone, perhaps you can raise this at another time and plan a getaway for just you two. RPW is about improving ourselves for the sake of our relationship, not convincing our partners t…
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/19 10:41 PM
1

Wow great response you've convinced me
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 06:34 PM
3

Meanwhile I'm here with halo top, cats, and a gorgeous husband. Oops!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 05:25 PM
3

Lying is not RPW advice. Nor is settling for someone we're not into. Read the sidebar.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:57 PM
2

It's none of your business.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:51 PM
3

Sexually open with each other. We're not swingers. You're continuing to show your naivety.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:48 PM
3

I'm not denying that there are men who fit what you're describing, I'm denying that this describes all men. I have plenty of first hand experience here and I know for a fact that there are many men out there who do not fit that mold. These are the men that OP should be chasing. Your view on this is incredibly short sighted.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:47 PM
5

And women aren't trying to marry RP "alphas". The world is not so one dimensional. I'm married to a man with plenty of alpha traits (including a wild and promiscuous past of his own) and couldn't care less about my history. Further, the fact that we're both very sexually open means that were incredibly compatible. It's great.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:38 PM
3

You're welcome. Sexual openness exists on a spectrum, and promiscuity is simply a symptom of that. Openness in itself is not a bad thing, and the way you behaved when you were young and uncommitted does not dictate how you will express that openness when you're in a monogamous relationship later on. In my experience (and there's lots of it) sexually open people are not fussed about these ideals of purity, and these are the men you want to be looking for. You'll be more compatible (sexually and o…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:36 PM
2

No one can "have it all", but I personally can serve as an example that you're wrong. Lots of men don't fit into your restrictive, sanitized view of how relationships work.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:32 PM
4

The rebel/bad boy is infinitely more likely to not care about a wild past. I suspect you've spent a lot of time reading bad content, and very little time interacting with the real world.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:20 PM
3

A lot of the young guys over there take it waaay too literally. His advice is a mess.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:19 PM
3

Yeah. The person offering that advice reads like a young guy who's taking all the RP stuff a little too literally. Advising you to look at whereareallthegoodmen? Lord... Even within a RP worldview there is a boatload of nuance and variability, and anyone who rejects that is in for a bad time.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:18 PM
6

A certain type of traditional, conservative man will likely be turned off by your past, but this is not the only type of man out there. My husband and I both had wild pasts before we met, and are now incredibly happy in monogamy together. Not all guys are so hung up on purity, and you're going to be more compatible all round with someone with a more forgiving stance on this. I've never been attracted to the neurotic type, so this worked out perfectly for me! Do not listen to the advice telling y…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:14 PM
5

Terrible advice. All of it. Don't hide your past, and DON'T settle for someone who doesn't excite you.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:05 PM
42

In my experience, very masculine/dominant men prefer women who aren't going to wither when they're looked at the wrong way. That doesn't mean they want an argumentative harpy, but overt submission is not always an attractive trait for these men.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 09:27 AM
1

I'm sorry to bring the focus to your weight, but the attitude of sticking at 230 lbs for the foreseeable future is a terrible one. If you're 30 and single, and I assume your goal is to find a man since you're posting here, your priority should be to lose the weight asap. I'm the same height as you, and 170lbs is not anorexic-looking by any stretch. I hover around 150 but truth be told I look best at 140. I've been much heavier in the past, and us tall girls simply can't pull of chubby/fat like s…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 09:20 AM
7

Where does the feeling of guilt come from? If it's a religious thing, then that's between you and God. I'm not religious so can't help out there, but I'd seek some guidance from someone older and respected in your church. If the guilt is coming from these internet posts ragging on sluts, I'm afraid you're just going to have to grow a thicker skin and move past it. You'll find people on the internet who will insult you for anything if you look hard enough. Their opinions on sluts should carry any…
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/19 01:05 AM
3

Agreed
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/19 12:52 AM
6

but i guess i'm on the wrong sub in that case The word "women" in the title should have given that away.
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/19 12:18 AM
6

Wanting sexual variety? No not really. RP101. Men want to have sex with as many young, attractive woman as possible. Women want to nail down one man who provides the best mix of genes and protection.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 11:56 PM
2

Yup makes sense.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 11:32 PM
2

Honestly I can't control my feelings when I'm hormonal so I just isolate myself. I have one day a month where I'm angry, irritable and snappy at anyone who gets in my path, and one day a month where I'm emotional and anxious and will cry at the drop of a hat. On my angry day I take myself out for a swim or a coffee or something alone, and spend as little time around other humans as possible. On my sad day I wrap myself up on the couch and remember that it will pass. The biggest help for me is ju…
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 11:30 PM
5

Do you disagree? Plenty of men want monogamy and marriage more than they want that variety so will not act on it, but apart from a few outliers I think it's a pretty safe generalization to make.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 11:21 PM
16

Terrible logic.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 11:18 PM
30

If you're not into this guy don't dump him "soon", dump him now. You're wasting your time. Date slightly older men who are looking to start a family soon. If a man is still concerned with dating around and enjoying life, he's either too young or incompatible. Narrow your pool to people who are on the same page as you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 09:44 PM
9

All men desire sexual variety, but not all men will act on that. Vet for a man who's shown discipline in other areas of his life, look at his relationship history, and check for signs that his principles include monogamy. That's really the best you can do.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 08:15 PM
5

hashtag goals!
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 12:00 PM
1

You're welcome. Good luck with it <3
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/19 02:19 AM
5

Who's angry? You're telling her that an unbalanced relationship where a man directly says "I don't love you" can be a healthy one. I'm telling you that from the female perspective, you are wrong. You are the one showing solipsism in believing that your experience as a male translates to a female's. I also don't believe that men equate saying I love you with running off and marrying right away. I think you're a little confused about the purpose of the sub. Perhaps the sidebar will help.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/19 02:18 AM
2

I don't think that number 2 is productive. He knows he hurt you. I would ask him if he's been in love before, how long it took him to get there, and if he honestly believes that his feelings for you are likely to grow to love in the near future. I would tell him that you place a lot of weight in cohabiting, and that you won't be able to live with him until engagement.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/19 02:03 AM
3

And this is red pill women, where we discuss female sexual strategy. Staying committed to a man who won't say that he loves her is never in a woman's interests. If he's got that particular gate locked down, the RPW answer is "next".
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/19 01:56 AM
3

Yeah agreed. He's got a very odd perspective on this.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/19 01:02 AM
2

Honestly, the mature thing to do in this situation is to stay calm, listen to him, and make a smart decision for yourself. Do not attach yourself to a man who doesn't feel that strongly for you. If you want a future with him, love is a prerequisite.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 10:44 PM
6

This is your male solipsism speaking. Perhaps from the male perspective a relationship like that is just fine, but for a woman to invest in a man she needs to hear that he loves her. A relationship where she's thinking to the future and he's unable to say those words is not a good relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 10:40 PM
1

Personal experience and that of friends.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 10:14 PM
2

She posted about him a couple of days ago but deleted the post
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 08:14 AM
7

Yeah, I understand :( When you two have that conversation, I would consider asking him if he's been in love before, and how long it took him to feel that way. Ask him if he can see himself falling in love with you in the future.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 05:03 AM
2

You've only been back together 3 months since your last break up. Give it time.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 04:52 AM
0

Show us an example of what you're talking about. I think you'll find different people use it in different ways.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 04:50 AM
40

I'm sorry, that must have really hurt. Hear him out when he comes to talk, but honestly I think I'd already be one foot out the door. I think that 9 months is plenty of time to know if you love someone, especially at 30. If his feelings aren't there now I highly doubt that more time is going to change that. Usually when men come around after a year or more and say "oh actually I do love you now", it means that he previously thought he could do better, and you're his fall-back option when that pl…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 04:44 AM
13

What? No. Why would a man lie about not being in love with her? He gave her a clear answer, playing the "ok he said X but really he must mean Y" game is foolish.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 04:32 AM
5

If it bothers you, then yes you should care about it. Promiscuity has never bothered me, and my partners have all had a similar opinion. Like girlwithabike said in the other thread, similar histories tend to be sexually compatible in the long run. There are a million things I'd look to before n count when vetting a man, but that's just me.
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 11:37 PM
7

It depends entirely on the type of man you're with. I've personally never had a man ask the details of my history and would be quite put off if they did. I've never really been attracted to the careful, tradcon types so perhaps that's why I haven't been exposed to this preoccupation with n-count. I know other women have had a different experience and I'm sure they'll chime in.
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 06:03 PM
5

He's very logical and is a guy who needs his ducks in a row before moving forward with anything else Then I guess he'll understand your need to get your marriage ducks in a row before moving in together ;)
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 03:45 AM
5

3 months isn't long. Give it some more time before you move in or get engaged, and hopefully things stay good for you. Don't move in together without an engagement though if you're concerned about a timeline.
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 11:52 PM
10

So he decided to get back together when he was unemployed and depressed and realized you're his best option? Ouch. He's right that you should be seeking someone who will cherish you, is he that guy? How long have you been together since the last break up? This aside, given your history he obviously knows that marriage is important to you and that you're not wanting to wait around forever. Next time he brings up the idea of getting an apartment together, simply tell him that you'd love to do that…
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 11:21 PM
3

I don't think the norm is inherently dysfunctional. I know plenty of loving BP families that have raised wonderful children, and I know toxic tradcon families that have raised broken children. And vice versa. In the end I think it comes down to the character of the child. You can have a rough upbringing and turn that into strength or bitterness. My personal experience however has been that trauma leads to ongoing emotional problems more often than not.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 02:45 PM
3

I think healthy women come from healthy backgrounds in which they observed healthy masculine and feminine adults. Agreed. What incentive is there to raise our children well if this isn't the case? Most happy, well adjusted adults I know came from happy, well adjusted families.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 12:43 PM
2

Lucky! I think I'm definitely going to have to invest in one after seeing all the replies here!
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 09:26 AM
3

No. I grew up in a happy, traditional sort of household. I was lucky enough to watch my parents love and look after each other and I wouldn't trade that for anything. I think it taught me everything I know about being a good wife.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 09:25 AM
4

I don't actually have a crock pot, but I think a lot of those recipes do well in a Dutch oven so will give that a go! Thanks
/r/RedPillWives24/02/19 06:59 AM
19

What? Why wouldn't you talk about your plans for children before you marry? This is exactly when you should be talking about these things!
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 06:47 AM
4

Ooh yes we're not big pasta people but chili really does taste better the second time!
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 06:04 AM
2

Thanks! I've never been able to get into meal prepping because after a day or 2 I find everything just gets... old. I haven't found any meals that really take to sitting in the fridge for days before eating. Am I missing something?
/r/RedPillWives24/02/19 06:04 AM
3

Next
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 04:42 AM
12

You can't "make sure" he'll do anything. You can raise this with him like an adult, tell him what you told us, and see what his response is. If he disagrees, you can have a discussion and perhaps he'll suggest a compromise.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 04:34 AM
7

I've dated older men before and I know it can be difficult to know when to put your foot down and how to do it correctly. It's definitely an art! Just remember that being submissive in nature does not require you to agree to everything. In fact, it's actually more important to be able to voice your concerns firmly when they're valid. A man can't lead correctly taking your best interests into account if he doesn't know what those are. I don't think there's anything wrong with bringing up the conv…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 03:48 AM
3

Have you told him how important marriage is to you?
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 03:21 AM
9

There's definitely a trend at the moment where women's desire for marriage is being minimized, writing it off as "just a piece of paper". Our culture has been built on a tradition of monogamous marriage, and to turn around now and say it's just a legality is disingenuous. This is one area where I feel a woman should not compromise. If marriage is important to you, then it is important to you, and there is a very good reason that you almost never see quality women relegated to "forever girlfriend…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 03:04 AM
5

It's not even worth discussing. This whole thing is a mess and if you have an ounce of respect for either of you, you should leave.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/19 08:05 PM
2

Good luck! Let us know how it goes :)
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/19 07:51 AM
4

Hmm. I'd be wondering if he's even read your profile in that case. I would just say that you're looking for someone who complements your strengths with his own, and reverse the question.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/19 07:45 AM
24

I don't think your requirements are unreasonable, there are plenty of men who fit that description and you're right to want to filter out those who don't. I would consider framing it in terms of what you hope to contribute to a relationship, and that you're looking for a man who complements that. Tell him about your domestic skills, how much you enjoy looking after people you love, how you love the nurturing aspect of your career in education, but ultimately you'd like to apply that to your own …
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/19 07:32 AM
1

Unless you're part of a religious community that values virginity at marriage, I'd say no. Some men prefer virginity, but the fact is that we are part of a modern culture where there are particular norms around dating and relationships. For most western societies, it is not "normal" to be a virgin after a certain age, and it certainly isn't normal to be in a relationship that doesn't involve sex. By placing these types of demands, you are cutting huge swaths of men from your pool of potential pa…
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/19 11:53 AM
3

Yeah that screamed troll to me
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/19 06:24 AM
5

lol at least make a throwaway if you're going to troll, dummy from your history: O SNAP I REALIZED A STAFF MEMBER PROBABLY BANNED ME BECAUSE I WAS "ADJUSTING MY BALLS" LMAOOOO SERIOUSLY FAT GUYS NEED TO ADJUST THEIR BALLS. nothing sexual about it. maybe i should do it off camera LMAO
/r/RedPillWomen18/02/19 07:13 AM
2

My personal opinion is that it's mainly incel/unattractive types who don't want to admit it. The "you can't fire me I quit!" type. But they're not on my radar, I couldn't care less what these guys do. When I was dating there was no shortage of wonderful guys who wanted marriage, and I ended up with the love of my life.
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/19 06:25 AM
3

I'm very good at math, plenty of women are. But it is a "male-brained" skill and one that more men than women excel at.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 02:06 PM
41

You shouldn't be going for dinner and having intimate conversations with a taken man. He's indulging in these thoughts and reminiscing about someone else, which is a sign of poor character in my book. A man who turns to another woman when his relationship is rocky is not a man you should be investing in. Don't see him again unless his relationship is over, and even then, tread very carefully.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 07:11 AM
2

I'm not disagreeing that sex and desire are absolutely necessary. For some men, intelligence is also an absolute must.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 02:48 AM
4

Plenty of men enjoy mental stimulation from their partners, mine included. My husband had a hot dumb thing before me, and broke up with her because he needed some intellectual stimulation at home.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 02:29 AM
2

You've hit the nail on the head here. I can tell you're a writer because you've expressed what I was trying to say with my own STEM oriented brain so much more elegantly. You've demonstrated exactly the type of feminine intelligence that I was taking about. I don't know your bf, but I suspect you're right that he values that femininity in you. I would say to learn to value it and let it out even more. Don't be afraid to nourish this part of you and share these thoughts with him.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 01:42 AM
10

I have a strong proclivity towards STEM Same. I'm about a month away from submitting my PhD thesis in applied physics. I do think that liberal arts degrees are useless compared to STEM degrees. Useless in what sense? For finding a well paying job, yes of course they don't stand up to a CS degree, but that isn't what I'm talking about. In fact, that your definition of value looks directly to practical use, employment, "advancing our species" is exactly the point that I'm making. These are masculi…
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 01:38 AM
2

I hate that this is true! I can only sleep on my left side and I can see the wrinkles forming around my left eye are worse than my right.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 12:40 AM
2

This is a brilliant point.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 12:39 AM
1

Nice! I'm so glad I was able to do this. My husband also travelled a lot when he was young and even years into our marriage we're still swapping stories that haven't been told yet. And when we travel together we get to make new ones :)
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 12:38 AM
20

That's ok, I think I understand what you were getting at. The kind of language you used is a pet peeve of mine, because in my opinion it's one of the most damaging aspects of feminism. Before women started trying to be men, a different, more feminine type of intelligence and intellectualism was appreciated and respected. That kind of wisdom and soft power and depth that is prevalent in good women. Feminism has pushed that aside and said "no! We want to be like the boys! You should be appreciatin…
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 12:23 AM
3

Do you ever speak to him about these interests? Sounds like you could definitely have some interesting conversations around this stuff!
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 12:07 AM
36

Mindless simplicity is not feminine. For all of human history women have held a rich intellectualism in their own way. It isn't the type of intellect that is valued in the modern mainstream, but it's always been there. Women of good character have always had a rich inner life, and you don't need to be into maths and science to cultivate one.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/19 11:49 PM
22

Well there's your answer. If he's bored by you (and I don't know if he is) it's because you're missing an inner life of your own. Not because you're unable to discuss programming with him.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/19 11:45 PM
3

He's not answering any questions. Just handing out weird trp truisms. Waste of time.
/r/TheRedPill14/02/19 11:32 PM
21

So what do you think about? Is the problem that you don't have an internal life that intersects with his, or that you don't have one at all? I don't think he's hoping you'll say you're thinking about maths. He knows you and knows that's not your area. Tell him about the book you're reading, or a poem that you like, or your thoughts on an artist, or whatever. Just because you're not into programming doesn't mean you don't have anything interesting to share with him.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/19 11:26 PM
42

Has he ever mentioned that he wishes you had more overlap in your interests? There's nothing to stop you understanding his interests from a high level. If he's into chess, maybe you'd be interested in reading about the history of chess or the lives of important players. You don't need to be a grand master to appreciate the things he's excited about and be able to engage in a conversation about it with him. Not all men want an intellectual equal at home. It's likely he gets to flex that part of h…
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/19 10:46 PM
19

To add some diversity to the answers, at 24 I was a dreadlocked hippie hitch hiking around Europe. After finishing my degree I spent a couple of years living like a nomad and seeing as much of the world as I could. I dated a few different guys in this period, but being a traveler I knew that none of them were going to be my husband. I came home around 25, did my masters, met my husband at 27 and married at 29.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/19 10:43 AM
8

The holy trinity of youthful skin is sunscreen, botox and retinol. Start all three now if you can afford it, and you can thank me when you're 50 :)
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/19 03:41 AM
5

What's with RPW and why does it exist? Do you think that men can give relationship advice to women while keeping the female sexual strategy front and centre? ie should the fish be teaching the fisherlady how to fish?
/r/TheRedPill13/02/19 11:11 PM
1

Lol and I said Not all, no. But I wouldn't like my chances. There are plenty of great men with an RP outlook who don't hang out on that particular sub. We're going in circles. Best to just leave it.
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/19 09:07 PM
1

Which is why I asked her to clarify if she meant RP-minded or a poster on the TRP sub.
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/19 08:43 PM
6

Not all, no. But I wouldn't like my chances. There are plenty of great men with an RP outlook who don't hang out on that particular sub.
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/19 08:40 PM
1

"red pilled" as in reads TRP? There's your first mistake...
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/19 08:33 PM
1

Yeah it's all a bit messy. My husband wanted to mix our finances before we married for tax reasons, and even though it would have benefitted me far more than him, I declined. Some things belong only in a marriage, and sharing money is one of those things imo.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 11:22 PM
2

You should really put all of the relevant information in the OP. The situation changes with every comment you make. I think you should split your finances and pay everything down the middle until you're ready to marry.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 11:19 PM
1

Yeah, she didn't put it in her original post but elaborated in her reply to me. It does affect her because they agreed that she'd pay the rent so that he could pay down his student loans, and now he's giving that money away. And I never said to dump his ass, I said that given the situation they should have a serious conversation about money and renegotiate who pays what.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 11:02 PM
3

Yeah, I'd be having a serious conversation about money before you go any further. He's moved into your house when that wasn't your agreement, and he's now living cheap while you pay his rent. It's very nice of you to look after him like this, but if he wants to give away a thousand dollars a month then the living costs should be split evenly. You're not his mom.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 11:00 PM
1

Eek she's already paying his rent for him, so it's not that simple unfortunately. I feel like we need a big poster up the top warning these girls against mixing finances before marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 10:35 PM
2

In that case, I take it back. If you're paying his rent then you're well within your rights to have a discussion about money. Your agreement was to pay more of the living costs so that he can pay off his loans, not so he can give it away. Do you have a timeline on engagement/marriage? This whole arrangement sounds like a bad deal for you.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 10:33 PM
2

My opinion is that unless you're married, his money is his. If he chooses to gift it to his mother, that's his choice to make. Do you currently share finances? How do you share expenses at home? Now if you're planning to marry, then talks about money should absolutely happen before then. You will need to come to an agreement on how the two of you will manage money as a married couple, and this is an appropriate time to bring up your concerns about his gifting. Ideally these talks and an engageme…
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 10:07 PM
14

Good thing we're not trying to impress TRP then
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 02:27 AM
54

Aren't you married? You should be asking your husband his opinion, not the internet.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 02:07 AM
28

I'm curious why you are entering "nun mode"? It sounds like you more or less have your life together, but were betrayed by a shitty partner. Can you think of anything you did to contribute to his cheating? Is there anything, apart from the alcohol, that you feel you personally need to change in order to be a good partner? If I were you, I would get back on the metaphorical horse. You're 30, and even though you don't want children, time is ticking. I don't think there's much to gain in isolating …
/r/RedPillWomen07/02/19 11:50 PM
5

I think it's a class thing. It is with the people I know at least. All the UMC/UC guys I know end up marrying educated, professional women. It's not a good look for them to end up with a "normal" girl so they choose women from their level or close to it.
/r/RedPillWomen06/02/19 12:13 PM
7

I'm not convinced my husband knows that bathrooms need to be cleaned Hahaha same here. But on the other hand it took me about 6 months after we moved in together to notice I hadn't put gas in my own car in... 6 months. We have separate cars, and he will still take mine out just to fill it up and vacuum it for me ♥️
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 07:02 AM
4

I'm not sure why you're telling me all this. Complaining about feminism in RPW is preaching to the choir. However, if men feel that they are investing so much for such little reward in marriage, perhaps they should read up on vetting :) I agree with you that the concept of fairness should be thrown out in a marriage. As a concept it's toxic and of only leads to "he doesn't do the dishes! She doesn't make as much money! I do moooooore I'm not getting what I deserve!" rhetoric. Your complaints abo…
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 04:24 AM
1

It sounds a lot like he doesn't care about your (in this case exceedingly valid) concerns. I think this is a rare case when an ultimatum is the best you can do. Don't tell him what to do, but tell him what you need, and what you will do if that need isn't met. He's had long enough to make up his mind by now, if he's stalling now, at 29, he's being incredibly selfish. I would come up with a timeframe, and simply tell him that if you're not actively trying for children by that time you will need t…
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 02:26 AM
4

Yup, it's all backwards. I've seen this type of tit for tat mentality in relationships that have been very unhappy for a very long time. Eventually that union becomes fractured and "you and me against the world" becomes "every man for himself". Unless things turn around in a major way the marriage is as good as over at that point in my view. Imo as RPW our efforts should be less focused on how much housework to do, and more on how to cultivate a mentality of gratitude and a dynamic where we are …
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 02:07 AM
5

Yeah. Like, of course our household is run in a "communist" way lol. We share everything we own, we freely give our time to one another. What's next? Charging by the minute for time spent together or emotional support given? What an odd way to look at marriage and family.
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 01:11 AM
15

Yes, I treat my marriage as a partnership, not a business. Would you suggest that it's fair for /u/Kara_El to stop doing 50% of her family's housework because she makes substantially more than her husband? edit: you've posted that video at me before. honestly, why are you married if it is your view that in marriage "the wealth of the hardworking husband is systematically and institutionally redistributed to his lazy and freeloading wife"? i'm asking this in good faith, because i really, really d…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 10:54 PM
8

I disagree that it is "fair" to divvy up household chores depending on income. If you have two people both working 50 hour weeks, then "fair" would be a mostly equal time contribution to the house, regardless of comparative income. Coming home from a long day at work to do the housework while your husband/wife sits on the couch watching TV is a fast road to resentment, even if they're making more money.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 10:01 PM
4

Do you work? If so, do you work longer hours or make more money than your husband? Yes I work. I make a similar salary to my husband and work similar hours, but my work is lower stress and I can work from home a couple of days a week. Do you hire outside help? Yes. We have cleaners come once a fortnight to do heavier cleaning. How did you determine your division of labor? Are there any chores you or your SO refuse to do? We never had an official division of labor talk, but fell into roles that m…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 09:49 PM
1

If you're usually going to his place, I don't think it's unreasonable to split the cost of transport. When my husband and I started dating he paid for everything. It was him taking me out on dates, not vice versa. For transport, I would usually catch the subway to see him, and he would pay for my cab home.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 02:58 AM
4

Yeah that's really frustrating. I'm sorry. Does he know that IVF only has a 40% success rate? It shouldn't be treated as a solution.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/19 11:17 PM
39

Don't share a home, and definitely don't share finanaces before engagement. Giving a man all the benefits of marriage without a ring is exactly how forever girlfriends are made.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/19 09:01 PM
32

don't feel rushed She's 29, she needs to decide one way or another
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/19 09:00 PM
1

Was it not you that argued it's perfectly reasonable for a man to be totally turned off by his wife after watching her give birth?
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/19 07:29 PM
2

Women do more spending because they tend to manage the households. I spend almost all of our combined spending money, but that's because I buy our food, our toilet paper, our cat food, cleaning products, children's clothes, etc. I also buy our flights when we travel, book our hotels, make our charitable donations. I manage and book our house maintenance, and keep track of when his family's birthdays are so I can send them a gift or card. So yeah, I control 85% or more of our spending, but it's m…
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/19 04:19 AM
1

Ok, good luck 🤦
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/19 03:33 AM
5

So she's waiting for marriage to keep her family happy, but also wants to marry you because you're not like her family?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/19 03:16 AM
3

Why mention she's Asian then if she's culturally American?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/19 03:12 AM
2

I agree with this and our marriage is similar. There's no point trying to keep up with who's spending more. When you're married, you're a unit.
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/19 03:06 AM
2

So just trade him in for another one? Nice.
/r/RedPillWomen31/01/19 07:50 AM
2

Sure, it's possible you die very young. The fact is though, that if you get to age (and I hope you do!) it will be alone. Not everyone wants that kind of life, but if you're happy with that, then great.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 12:36 AM
5

I'm glad you got a good one, but the fact is you probably will be alone for the last 20-25 years of your life. If your marriage now makes up for those decades on your own, great. But there's a lot to be said for having love and companionship as you age and it's something OP should be aware of.
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/19 06:22 AM
15

It's not fear, it's being rational. If you're with someone 25 years older, chances are they're going to die 25 years earlier.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/19 08:27 PM
9

Your first point is great advice. I don't understand people who say "screw what your parents say, if it's love it's love!" Unless your parents are awful, they have your best interests at heart and probably know more than you do.
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/19 11:44 PM
44

Are you looking for a life partner? Are you prepared to be a widow for 25+ years? When you choose a husband for now, you're also choosing how you'll live out your twilight years. Keep that in mind.
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/19 12:53 PM
2

I've been getting botox for years and speak to my doctor about it regularly. It works by paralysing the underlying muscles so that the skin doesn't crinkle with facial expressions. It doesn't act on the skin at all, the skin appears tighter because the wrinkles have relaxed.
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/19 12:20 AM
2

This isn't how Botox works at all.
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 10:21 PM
6

You said that only military members should be able to vote for the president, because he is the commander in chief of the military. Implying that active military members are the only people with a stake in what the president does or who he/she is. He's also many other things that many other people have a stake in, but I think you know that. I think you're deliberately being disingenuous now and hoping no one calls you out on it. Again with the instant downvotes, loneliness :) where's your frame?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 09:17 PM
1

If the president is the commander in chief of the military, only active military personnel should have the right to vote him into office. Are you aware that the president does more than command the military?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 07:45 PM
1

Yup exactly
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 05:32 AM
9

No, she's right. There are more men at the extreme top and bottom end of the IQ bell curve, but the averages are the same. Men and women are equally intelligent on average. The men who are making those intellectual breakthroughs and winning chess tournaments are those extreme outliers, as are the dumbest humans alive. If men and women "equalled the same IQ" or had even compatible IQ, women would account for more innovation and intellectual achievement. Do you mean comparable IQ?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 05:30 AM
4

https://www.google.com/search?q=spirituality+definition
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 05:24 AM
1

In short, we all wonder what life would have been like if we'd plucked a different fig Is this a Plath reference? Such a beautiful passage
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 04:23 AM
1

RP/RPW is just a set of words to describe a natural phenomenon. these things don't exist because we call them so, and it makes no difference what you wife happens to call it. she's a natural, leave her be.
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 03:54 AM
1

why?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 03:46 AM
2

If she's doing well, why change anything?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 02:36 AM
1

I couldn't care less
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 02:25 AM
3

I love Camille Paglia
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 02:16 AM
5

When's the last time anyone was drafted for anything? The American draft will never be used again.
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 02:05 AM
8

spirituality is whatever makes you feel good/lofty/elevated/inspired/spiritual that's not what spirituality means.
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 01:29 AM
7

Attraction is critically important in a relationship or marriage. My husband and I disagree on plenty of things, but he's a good man and I find him incredibly attractive so it works. I could meet the most "compatible" man in the world, but if I'm not attracted to him the marriage will fail. That's just how it is.
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/19 01:37 AM
13

The talk is only awkward if you make it awkward. There are plenty of graceful and charming ways to make sure that you're exclusive before sleeping together.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 03:40 AM
5

Once you've agreed to be exclusive and you believe that you have similar goals in terms of a relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 01:25 AM
10

I would wait for him to finish his PhD. This isn't the right time to force a conversation. Once he's done and the dust has settled, bring it to him in terms of what you have in mind for your life, not what you're expecting him to do. Tell him that you feel like your next step in life will be marriage, and that this is what your want your future to look like. Ask him if his plans line up with that.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/19 11:32 AM
3

There's a difference between branch swinging and understanding when a relationship isn't working for you. Be careful, but don't pay too much mind to TRP fearmongering. Keep in mind there are a lot of men in there with a lot of baggage that they're expressing. You're 20. I've been there, and I promise you'll love again.
/r/RedPillWomen14/01/19 03:18 AM
3

You feel this way because you're still in love with him. I guarantee you that down the track when you've emotionally moved on that you will meet someone else who blows you away, and you'll be wondering why you were so hung up on him. It's just monogamy taken to an extreme. Even the strongest loves can and do eventually be replaced. It just doesn't feel that way right now.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 09:20 PM
2

You can theorize all you like on what it really means, and what women are really saying when they talk about personal growth, but it will just be that. I can simply speak from experience and say that at 20 I was not in the right position to make a smart decision on who to marry. At 26 I was. The overwhelming majority of my female friends were the same. Have you heard of Occam's Razor? The simplest explanation is usually the correct one.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 09:14 PM
6

Yes women married earlier in the past, but they also had less of a say in who they married. Divorce rates were lower, because they couldn't divorce. Who are we to say that these women were happy in their marriages? This is red pill women, and as such is concerned with female sexual strategy through a red pill lense. It is perfectly reasonable and in line with red pill thought to suggest that in today's world where it is normal to marry later, it may be in a woman's best interest to delay marriag…
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 04:59 AM
2

I edited asktrp out of my comment because on second thought I don't think that is the right place to go for you. You should be speaking to men older than yourself who are paired off and happy. I don't think you'll find many of those in asktrp
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 03:56 AM
7

I think you should ask other men about this. Sorry you're having a hard time, but it isn't our job to sell women to you. Edit: men who are happy in their relationships or marriages (there are plenty). If you hang out in MGTOW and other angry subs you're surrounding yourself with people who have been screwed over. It's not a healthy sample to surround yourself with.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 03:45 AM
2

Yup, and plenty of women who make poor decisions at 19 would make much better ones at 25. That's all I'm saying.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 03:03 AM
3

I did mention if women want quality men, she must increase her value in whatever shape or form. If you want to add cognitive abilities, sure, add that too. I think you might have missed my point. I was talking about cognitive ability to the end of being able to choose a good partner for herself, not because it makes her more valuable in the eyes of a man.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 02:33 AM
5

While this is true, the marriage market is not simply men choosing the best women they can get. Women are also choosing the man. She can be the hottest thing on earth, but if she has the cognitive abilities of a child she's not likely to choose a good husband. Being able to recognize compatibility is so important in starting a successful marriage, and that's often something that comes with age.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 01:00 AM
1

We're not talking about men.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 12:58 AM
11

All you've provided is your own personal conjecture. Perhaps in an ideal world, 20 year old girls will have the maturity to choose a good husband, but here in the real world all 20 year olds have an underdeveloped pre-frontal cortex and relatively poor decision making skills. Neurologically, they are considered teenagers. Most people marry someone within a few years of their own age. How many 23 year old guys do you see out there wanting to marry?
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 12:54 AM
6

Yep. The dangerous thing about being a teenager is that you think you've got it all figured out. At 19 I swore black and blue that I knew better than my mother and that I was totally going to marry my boyfriend at the time. Ooooh boy was mom right!
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 12:29 AM
10

I think you're seeing a cultural divide in the answers here. I'm from a big city, and everyone around me is educated, well-travelled, upper middle class "worldly" people. I suspect /u/ragnarockette is from a similar social circle? I think that for people like us, later marriage works best as everyone is studying, working on their careers, travelling, saving money, etc in their early 20s. The girls I know who married early are the ones who stayed in the suburbs/a rural area, had a religious backg…
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 12:21 AM
4

I've had a similar experience in my circles. My husband's friends are all high value guys, and are just now in their early 30s starting to marry. They are all married/engaged to women 1-3 years younger. When they were single they'd hook up with and casually date much younger women, but when it came to choosing a spouse to settle down with they looked to their peers.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 12:16 AM
1

I was simply wording it as the study did. First marriages include marriages that end and marriages that don't. Including the word "first" when taking about age relevant. My point was that the most women are marrying at 27, not mid 30s as /u/ohioguyT seems to believe. He just got sidetracked.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 10:51 PM
10

I think we should date seriously and with purpose while we're young, but understand that our rational abilities don't mature until 25 or so. Nothing wrong with using your looks to find a great guy in your early/mid 20s and delaying the decision to marry until you're a bit older.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 09:38 PM
1

Wow, glad you cleared that up.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 09:34 PM
17

How is it blue pill to consider how age effects marital success? According to studies, the most successful marriages start at 28-32 Of course there's a tradeoff with looks, but a woman who looks after herself has plenty of great options at 25. Date for a couple of years, make sure you're compatible, vet carefully, and then marry. This is what hard data says is best, isn't RP about looking at reality?
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 09:27 PM
1

What's your point?
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 09:24 PM
2

Agreed. Of course it's possible it work out, but men and women are both very dynamic at that age so it doesn't make a lot of sense to make a lifelong decision before you've figured all of that out.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 09:24 PM
2

women are waiting til well into their thirties to commit, and ideally seeking men about their own age, while men that age are also looking to commit... but to someone 5-10 years younger. That is simply not true. Average age of first marriage is about 27 for women, and considering most couples date for 2-3 years before marrying, most women are pairing off with their future husbands around 24/25.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 09:01 PM
22

I went through a lot of personal growth in my early-mid 20s, and changed a lot as a person in those years. If I had married the man I was dating at age 20, even though I was mad about him at the time, I would be either divorced or very unhappy right now. Consider that the adult, rational part of your brain isn't fully developed until about 25 and any decisions you make up until then are essentially made with a teenager's emotional brain. Of course it's possible to have a happy marriage that star…
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 08:55 PM
6

Skipping the stage of strict, careful vetting is not implementing RPW correctly. You can be the best wife in the world, but if you skipped step one and chose a shitty man then you're not doing it right. Be grateful that he showed his cards now and not after you're committed with children.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 04:29 AM
4

We can't tell you if you'll grow resentful. If you think you'll be happy supporting yourself, two children and a man, then tell him that. Not my cup of tea, but we're all different.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 03:04 AM
5

Yeah, I personally wouldn't be chasing this relationship. He seems to complain a lot about not making enough money, but what has he done to overcome this? Ten years is a long time.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 02:53 AM
1

So why would you end a loving relationship because you have this idea that just because he hasn’t given you an object it means he doesn’t love you when everything else says otherwise? because this is how forever-girlfriends are made, and not many women want to be a forever-girlfriend. if OP has decided that marriage is a must for her, then it is a must for her, and it is not our place to make her justify that. she's asked for advice on how to get to marriage, not whether marriage is essential in…
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 01:56 AM
1

Yeah, you're right. I misunderstood the intent of this comment.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 01:41 AM
6

You can't really expect us to give useful advice about finances if you won't talk about these huge financial obstacles he's apparently overcome. Dating is only a minefield if you're reckless. Getting to 40 without ever having had a healthy relationship is a huge red flag, no matter how you look at it.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 01:29 AM
4

Yep. If he's not able to fully forgive her, then she needs to move on. In my experience LTRs rarely fully recover from infidelity.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 12:42 AM
8

No, but she could waste years trying to repair a relationship that is dead in the water. There's plenty to lose.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 12:39 AM
1

Again. This is not the place for men to come in and debate the pros and cons of marriage with us.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 12:20 AM
8

Eventually, it will pay off. not necessarily
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 12:12 AM
5

it's a lot easier to just "live and enjoy" life when you're not a 26 year old single mom of two who's dating a 40 year old possible ex-con who hates women and doesn't make any money. funny joke though.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 12:09 AM
1

And if he doesn't take that step? Marriage is important to OP, this isn't the place to debate that.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 12:06 AM
3

how is this helpful?
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:49 PM
8

A marriage is both. It is an act of love, and it is a very serious set of promises that you make to one another infront of your family, your community, the government, and in some cases God. If marriage is important to OP, then it's important to OP. She doesn't need to justify why.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:34 PM
4

Yes I agree with this and think it's a good approach. Decide what you need from a relationship, make it very clear to your partner, and let him do what he wants with that information - be prepared to leave if your plans don't line up.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:31 PM
6

If it took walking away from him in order to get a proposal, he wouldn't be the guy for me. Marriage is very important to me, and if he needs to be coerced into it then we're simply incompatible. I made my desire for marriage clear early on, and brought it up again when my now-husband wanted to combine finances. I simply said that I'd love to do that one day, but not until we're married. We were engaged a few months after that. There's a difference between an ultimatum, and making sure your valu…
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:27 PM
11

Marriage is a must for most women. As a women's sub, we'll give her advice on securing marriage if that's what she wants. This isn't the place to argue the pros and cons of marriage or trying to convince OP not to seek it.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:22 PM
7

Has he forgiven you? You should be able to tell your partner you love him. If things aren't healing in that direction after 7 months, perhaps too much damage has been done and you'll need to cut your losses.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:17 PM
8

He’s been through a lot in his past, “several hells” as he put it This is very vague, and if this is how he described it to you I'd be running for the hills. It's the male equivalent of a drama queen. What exactly has he been through? How has this left him disadvantaged? Why has he reached 40 and still been unable to turn it around? He might have good reasons, but being evasive about it all is not a good sign. I do not think he’s ever had a very serious relationship with a woman, though I can se…
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 11:03 PM
11

He's getting everything he wants, why would he change anything now? How important is marriage to you? Is it worth risking the relationship? If I were in your position I would sit down with my partner and tell him exactly how important marriage is to you, and how uncomfortable you are making this move without at least an engagement. If this conversation doesn't light a fire under him you're in a tricky spot. Use the house as your leverage. Tell him you made a mistake in agreeing to the move witho…
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 10:39 PM
2

I wear a side braid like 80% of the time. It looks pretty, is gentle on your hair, keeps it out of your face and shows off the length all at once.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 07:45 AM
9

I agree. I handle all of the finances in our home. My husband will make big decisions like how much to spend on a house, car, etc, but only after I've managed the day to day and let him know exactly where we stand. I think Laura Doyle recommends this because it's a good exercise in giving up control in general, and finances is an area that many women stress over unnecessarily. If it doesn't apply to you, then don't do it.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 06:50 AM
2

I was using your personal statements to make a comment on men and men like you in general. In my experience, men who say the types of things you're saying in this thread are also men who have struggled with masculinity and dominance. It makes sense that you and men like you have the opinions of women that you do, when your experiences have been coloured by the way you present yourself to women. Perhaps I'm wrong about you personally, but I don't think so and that's beside the point anyway. Natur…
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 05:15 AM
2

I'll check out of this conversation because you're clearly talking about fixing society's problems en masse and I have no interest in discussing that here. I'm talking specifically about how a man conducts himself in his own relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 04:57 AM
1

It's not personal. I'm saying that men who have the attitude of "you broke it, you fix it" or "women are too hard to deal with, imma check out" or "flirting with women is sooo risky I don't want to go to jail" are type of men who struggle with dominance and masculinity in the first place. Naturally dominant men don't talk like this because they don't have these problems.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 04:50 AM
1

I agree with /u/girlwithabike. Your attitude to this is a very defeatist one, which may explain your experiences with women in general.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 04:32 AM
1

men don't care if a woman walks away for this reason or any other reason. Simply not true. I've personally been shamed by a man for not wanting to meet in his house on the first date. .... When this man is cautious around women because he's been neutered by the legal system, it was only because he allowed himself to be neutered? In my opinion, yes. How much effort will it cost him to be good enough of a man? For the right man, not much. My point is that this boils down to presence and inherent m…
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 01:37 AM
2

True, but when the average man hears a story like this, he'll may just conclude that the risk just isn't worth it. And some women will hear stories of date rape or domestic violence and conclude that being around men isn't worth the risk. I'd say that in both cases they're being neurotic and paranoid, but that's up to them how they interpret risk. This too is true. Western men have been neutered by western women and western legal systems. If a man's been neutered by a legal system, it's because …
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 09:11 PM
2

I think the other posters have summed it up pretty well, but I just want to say that this is why I would never advise a woman to marry at such a young age. We don't figure out who we are and what's important to us until well after 19, and the risk of getting stuck with someone who is not a good match is just too high. All the best, I hope you figure something out.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:20 AM
2

Some men can absolutely do it with the right look or tone of voice. Attractive, masculine men don't need to get violent or have the government to intervene in order to have their wives submit to them.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:02 AM
3

Absolutely not. You need to tell him in no uncertain terms that you are not ok with this, and that you will consider it infidelity no matter the circumstances. Make your requirements clear before he uses this as an excuse to cheat.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 06:10 AM
1

Yeah, porn is often a sex life killer unfortunately
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 06:08 AM
10

Next
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/19 06:34 PM
17

Ceddit is your friend Only thing is, he has an extreme sexual fetish. He asks me to video tape myself pooing on the floor for him and then text it to him, which I have done a few times already. During actual sex the fetish doesn't come up - he'll ask me to "projectile poo" for him but then he'll tell me not to "push too hard." Our sex has an element of sexual humiliation - which I also enjoy - but I'm kind of wondering about the pooing videos because this is something I've never heard of or can …
/r/RedPillWomen27/12/18 11:24 AM
6

I understand. Ive forgiven cheating in the past (not my husband, an ex), but bisexuality/homosexuality would be a deal breaker for me. I have no problem with gay people, but it would instantly kill all attraction for me.
/r/RedPillWomen23/12/18 11:28 PM
2

Yep. Having kids around you will make you more sure one way or another.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/18 10:17 PM
3

Where do you get fillers and what's your experience with it? I've been getting botox for years so am not opposed to the idea, but having been going back and forth on getting some light lip fillers for a while.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 08:00 AM
1

Mani/pedis: $50/month Eyebrows/lashes: $50/month Botox: $500/3 months Hair cut/color/treatment: $300/3 months Skincare: ~$200/year Make-up: ~$200/year I invested in at home teeth whitening and laser hair removal a couple of years ago and I'm sure that's paid for itself by now. I also get microdermabrasion, scrubs, facials, massage, etc whenever we travel abroad, which is 2-3 times a year.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 07:56 AM
1

Holy wow. Yep it sounds like their problems run a bit deeper.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 07:51 AM
2

Why would he need to be extra rough with her if he doesn't find her attractive? I don't understand your logic here.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 07:51 AM
3

Porn has heavily changed what's considered normal in sex, and what a lot of younger men expect as normal sexual behaviour now was not considered normal even 10 or 20 years ago. Men who watch a lot of more extreme porn end up needing more and more "extreme" acts to feel satisfied. In my opinion, him not being able to enjoy sex where he's not hurting you is not normal. Are you able to discuss porn with him, and maybe have a conversation about how it might be affecting his ability to enjoy more van…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 07:39 AM
3

Yeah, I agree she can't wait around too long. It's not an easy situation. My husband was around 29 when he changed his mind on kids, mostly due to his friends settling down and me making it clear when we met that it was something I wanted in life. If I were in her situation I would try to expose him to friends/family members with young kids and see if he warms to it, and if not she has a big decision to make. I don't envy her.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 07:33 AM
6

What are his porn habits like?
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 04:46 AM
3

I'm not disagreeing that sex is vital to men's happiness in a marriage, just that the main reason most men marry is for sex.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 10:17 PM
6

What kind of life stage are your husband's friends in? My husband was on the fence about kids until his friends started having them, and then fell in love with the idea. Sometimes men need to see what family life looks like before making up their minds, as they don't necessarily have that same kind of innate drive that we do. If his friends are still in the process of settling down and he says he wants to think about it, I'd give him a little time. Don't pressure him of course, but there is a ch…
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 10:16 PM
6

I don't think so. No matter how you twist your words now, I don't think it's true that most men marry primarily for access to sex. I think that might be a man on the internet chest beating thing.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 10:08 PM
1

Are you high little buddy?
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 10:06 PM
8

I guess we know different types of men
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 10:05 PM
12

So "I'm in love" actually means "I want consistent sex" when it comes from a man? Seems like a stretch. Men also experience affectionate, companionate love with their wives. And when the men in my life share with me, I listen. I don't like to assume they're all liars trying to appear less horny. There are lots of good reasons to marry, putting consistent sex right at the top is a recipe for disaster in my opinion, but you do you.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:50 PM
9

So we should never trust anyone or take what they say at face value? When the men in my life share their thoughts and opinions with me, I listen. There's no point constantly assuming dishonesty in people.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:42 PM
13

Is sleeping in separate bedrooms an option? Have you explained to him how much it's impacting your rest? Poor sleep quality is no joke.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:38 PM
17

Because they were in love, they wanted a family, they wanted to be a husband, they wanted the legal and financial benefits, they wanted to signal to their community how committed they were to their partner, they wanted to be taken seriously as a family unit by their community, etc, etc, etc. "I want to lock down consistent sex" has never come up.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:31 PM
5

Some guys in here will disagree with me on this, but typically, normal western guys are not obsessed with virginity. Unless you're going for someone very religious, then being a virgin at 23 will raise some eyebrows. Very few non religious western guys will save sex for marriage. I'm not saying to go out and get laid for the sake of it, but I would recommend going out there and dating and interacting in the normal western dating scene and see who you connect with.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:29 PM
19

I've spoken to plenty of men about marriage. None of them have ever said that the main reason they married was to get consistent sex.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:26 PM
1

Ask any man for the number one reason he agreed to get married and they'll probably tell you - to have a steady supply of sex. I've never heard a man say this
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:22 PM
7

Are you planning to date someone from your own culture or a westerner? This makes a huge difference in how men approach virginity.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:14 PM
1

Agree to disagree
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 02:20 AM
2

The cheftapp app is great, you can export recipes from any website and it keeps them all organised.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/18 11:23 PM
24

This line of thinking is addictive and very harmful, whether it's related to your relationship or otherwise. Read up on the hedonic treadmill. The more you indulge in it, the worse it will get. Like another user said, there will always be people better off than you, and there will always be people worse off. Cultivating gratitude for what you have is a wonderful skill that everyone should work on. My grandmother used to always say "if you're not sure that you married the right man, just look at …
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/18 02:15 AM
3

Agreed on all counts. If all the women around you are like that, best to check your feet. I think it's very telling that of all the possible people that loneliness lists, the only neutral to positive option is the devoted wife. He is quite directly implying that doing anything other than sucking it up and playing wifey is a sign of poor character. This is awful advice, and the kind of mentality that lands men and women in unhappy marriages. Personal anecdote, but if I hadn't recognized, carefull…
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/18 01:56 AM
4

I was primarily responding to this idea: Some people have moral principles so ingrained in the core of their being that they never allow this feeling to develop in the first place. They refocus on their spouse to the endth degree. He is not her spouse. She doesn't owe him the dedication that a spouse has earnt. I agree with you that indulging in crushes like this is a bad sign, but that's not what I was taking issue with. It was the above moralizing and the idea that she owes her boyfriend the s…
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 11:52 PM
0

Again, not my point. Vetting carefully, and continuing to vet until you are engaged, is not bad character. It is smart.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 11:22 PM
1

You've completely missed my point. I'm not saying that she should leave her partner, I'm not saying that she can necessarily do better or branch swing to this older guy. I'm taking issue with loneliness' idea that reconsidering her current relationship is a sign of poor character. Dating is for vetting, and it is in a woman's interest to make sure that the man she is dating is a good match for her. If I was 27 and had a dismal sex life, I'd be doing some serious thinking about myself, my partner…
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 09:58 PM
3

That's beside the point. If she realizes now, as a result of meeting another man or otherwise, that they're incompatible then there's nothing wrong with leaving her boyfriend. She hasn't married the man, this is what dating is for. This all smells a lot like moralizing to me.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 07:54 PM
8

There is something wrong with him though. They're hardly having sex. They're not even kissing, and he doesn't see any problem with this. They appear to be sexually incompatible.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 03:59 AM
6

I wouldn't go chasing this new man, you don't know anything about him and were just drawn in by his status. I would however be concerned about your current relationship. At 27 and only a couple of years into your relationship you should hope for a more active sex life. It's only going downhill from here, and it sounds like he's dismissed your concerns when you've brought them to him. The fact that you're crushing so hard on this guy is more a factor of something lacking in your current relations…
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 03:58 AM
4

Yeah, at 27 you'd hope there would be a more active sex life.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 03:55 AM
6

Hypergamy is useful only until you find a suitable man. After that, it's highly destructive. Agreed. But who's to say this man is suitable? They have no chemistry and he won't even kiss her. Hypergamy can be a useful thing while you're still vetting. And until you're engaged, you're still vetting. She should be aiming for the most compatible/attractive man she can realistically get. PS every time I speak to you you immediately downvote me. It's not helpful.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 03:46 AM
9

Some people take it as a hint that their relationship is not right for them. Recognizing incompatibility and moving on from a boyfriend is not a sign of bad character. She's not married, this is exactly what dating is for.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 03:02 AM
2

I think that for any dating/relationship matters we should all be referring to our own sex. Men should not be taking advice from women on these topics, and vice versa. For small day to day things, career advice, etc there's no reason we can't share our knowledge.
/r/RedPillWomen11/12/18 10:34 PM
9

For future reference, "I'm not talking to you so you can get over me" does come across as arrogant. It's not your job to help him get over you. A simple "thanks but I'm not interested in dating you" would be better
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 04:41 AM
9

How old are you? This all reads like high school drama. Don't reply to the guy, you owe him nothing. Don't repeat private conversations to your mutual friends. Don't be friends with people who yell at you and call you a bitch.
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 04:36 AM
5

Wow that's very involved! What would happen if he left you?
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 12:45 AM
2

Congratulations. Can I ask what legal arrangement you and your husband came to? I remember you proposing something like having his child, giving it up for adoption, and then having him adopt it so that you wouldn't be it's legal mother. Will you have any legal rights to this child?
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 12:16 AM
1

These are strangers on online dating. She doesn't owe them anything.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 11:10 PM
5

What exactly do you think you're adding to this thread? OP had a realization, and came in here to share that with other women. This sub is about female sexual strategy, so whether or not she inadvertently screwed some guys around is not our concern. Why you think your complaints about it are adding value to this thread is completely beyond me. This is about getting OP the dates that she wants. Whether or not you agree with her methods from a male point of view is irrelevant.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 11:07 PM
3

Just because she has nerdy interests doesn't mean that she's attracted to nerds.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 11:03 PM
1

Haha yep, I haven't touched the stuff in 10 years but some of my closest friends today were made on the side of a dancefloor while indulging a little too much :)
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 08:09 AM
4

Oh wow I didn't know rapeseed and canola were the same thing! Educational too.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:47 AM
7

Lol your username though! I laugh and cringe whenever I see it. You're welcome :)
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:24 AM
5

They say that people from healthy families will seek out a partner who reminds them of their mom/dad, and those from unhealthy families will look for the opposite. I had a great upbringing, and knew for sure that my husband was the one when I realized he's the only man I respect as much as my own father. I'd say you're on a great trajectory!
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:24 AM
2

This might not go down well, but have you used MDMA or other party drugs before? I was incredibly shy and reserved when I was younger, but fell into a great open minded crowd in college. MDMA and being around really warm, extroverted people really helped me come out of my shell and figure out who I wanted to be, and how to be that person. It breaks down a lot of those mental barriers that anxious/shy people tend to have.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:19 AM
29

I had a similar experience when I was using online dating and would talk about my job/degree straight up. It was what I was spending most of my time on at that point so it was the first thing that came to mind when I sat down to write my profile. The type of men I was hearing were all very stuck on this one aspect of myself, which I came to realize was not the part of me I wanted to be loved for. I reworded my profile emphasizing my hobbies, family, friends, life philosophy, etc and got much bet…
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:16 AM
4

Agreed. Video games, porn, romance novels, etc are all just cheap escapism. We'd all do well to avoid them.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:12 AM
22

Oh grow up. She's sharing some dating tips with other women, not asking men to come in and berate her for not getting it right first time.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 03:10 AM
7

Aw congrats on finding such a great woman :)
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/18 11:31 AM
31

Oh you're allowed to talk about TRP, you're just not allowed to say anything negative about it. Hence why I can't write my opinion here 🤣
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/18 10:09 AM
40

TRP is self selecting for a particular type of man. Without going into my opinions on who this type of man is (as that would be against the rules here), let's just say that it's not the type of man I would be interested in dating. Men end up at TRP for all sorts of reasons, but none of them are because they are well adjusted, attractive, romantically successful men. I suspect your thread will be removed shortly as it's against the rules to speak against TRP here, but for your own sake just stay …
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/18 09:26 AM
2

Yeah ok, but I wasn't talking about the OP. I was curious about your statement that men shouldn't have to do anything to incite desire, it should all be organic. Men that understand a woman's responsive sex drive understand that active and intentional seduction and flirting will lead to a better sex life for both. That was my point.
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/18 05:20 AM
3

So you're saying that the man's flirting and seduction should be spontaneous and organic, rather than the wife's desire for him? Is that not "knowing how to sexually excite his wife"?
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/18 04:21 AM
4

I disagree. My husband seduces me constantly and I think it works best that way. Yes, I'm attracted to him as is, and he's hot when he's doing nothing at all. But he's always making a conscious effort to say and do things to keep the fires burning hot, as am I. He's quite aware that women's sexuality is reactive rather than spontaneous and us having the best sex life possible involves some active seduction on both ends.
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/18 03:41 AM
0

You need to see a specialist doctor.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/18 11:36 PM
5

Why on earth would we want to do that?
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/18 11:35 PM
1

Yeah, definitely see a doctor, not a nurse. I agree with the other poster who said to see an endocrinologist.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/18 08:13 PM
4

I would see your doctor about this. Are you taking any other medications? How is your appetite? Any recent weight gain or loss? Hair loss to that extent is quite often due to an underlying hormonal imbalance, there may be more to it than just the steroid injections. Either way, you should get a doctor's advice.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/18 06:17 AM
3

Ew, no. That sub is just a bunch of guys bitching about trashy women. It's pretty distasteful to get together for the sole purpose of mocking those less fortunate than you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/18 03:20 AM
1

Ok, question 2. Why do men even want to run a girl's club? My question is in good faith, I genuinely don't get what kind of man would waste his time on that.
/r/TheRedPill30/11/18 02:56 AM
1

Are you the only person who wears heels to school? What kind of skirts are you wearing? Sometimes you just need to know what's appropriate/normal in a situation and temper yourself to fit in. I love ball gowns but I don't wear them to work because it would be weird. Extreme example, but part of life is recognizing context and being aware of that. It sounds like in the context of your school, wearing heels is weird. If you want people to take you seriously at school, then maybe dressing in a more…
/r/RedPillWomen30/11/18 12:00 AM
2

Lol ok convince my husband that we're ready for our third child and I'll get right to it.
/r/TheRedPill29/11/18 10:01 PM
1

If everyone is repulsed by her, then yes she needs to change. Teenagers should be able to socialize within their peer group.
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/18 09:59 PM
1

I have a couple of kids and a wonderful husband, but thanks for your concern.
/r/TheRedPill29/11/18 09:58 PM
1

Yes, I'm aware that they're all male. What's your point?
/r/TheRedPill29/11/18 09:57 PM
1

Where am I wrong? I just said that most mid-30s women are married or in relationships. Bewaretheoldman got visibly triggered by that and starting mathsing out for some reason.
/r/TheRedPill28/11/18 10:03 PM
20

“It is No Measure of Health to Be Well Adjusted to a Profoundly Sick Society” Sorry but this is a terrible mentality and one that people use to avoid improving themselves. If the way she's acting is putting everyone off, including potential dates and friends, she probably needs to adjust herself. If you're too weak to work in a butcher, fine, go look for a job in retail or something. There's nothing wrong with recognizing your abilities and playing to that. But if everyone thinks you're far too …
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/18 10:01 PM
25

I went to school with a girl who was overweight, brash and pretty masculine. She was funny which is why I was friends with her, but definitely not a typical "catch" from the male perspective. She fell for this gorgeous, athletic, intelligent guy and they ended up hooking up at a party. 10 years on and they're in one of the happiest marriages I've seen and she's a SAHM with their 3 beautiful kids. They adore one another.
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/18 09:23 PM
2

Ok or you could keep obsessing over what women are doing. Enjoy.
/r/TheRedPill27/11/18 12:30 AM
3

Lol you're just seeing keywords and emotionally responding to that before thinking. Slow down, it'll help you understand. I am talking about numbers, and as I said (multiple times now) most women are either married or LTRd when they reach that age. If you want to obsess over the minority, you do you. Or perhaps get a life outside of worrying about what a bunch of women are doing. Hey that's an idea.
/r/TheRedPill26/11/18 11:52 PM
5

You're ignoring all the other women who are in LTRs. Most women are partnered up in their mid 30s and doing just fine. I know you're getting off on imagining all these miserable horny spinsters, but it's not the case for most women. Sorry.
/r/TheRedPill26/11/18 07:42 AM
1

What do you say about men invading women's spaces, like Rollo and the others can't seem to stop doing at RPW? Why do men feel the need to hang out in girl's clubs?
/r/TheRedPill26/11/18 02:26 AM
2

It does her plenty of good if she's married or LTRd, like most 35 year old women are.
/r/TheRedPill26/11/18 02:22 AM
19

I'm married with kids, but thanks for your concern. When people talk about a woman's sexual peak they are talking about her peak in sexual drive/enjoyment. Not about her attractiveness to men. Not about her fertility. You can do better than this, Rollo. Your essays used to be good, now they're just lazy. No one, especially the women in RPW, take you seriously anymore.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/18 02:02 AM
3

I did, and you're wrong. Props for actually appearing in one of the threads you drop your half baked essays on, though.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/18 02:02 AM
5

🤣🤣🤣
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/18 08:08 PM
12

Also - the post is better suited as advice to men because the information is mostly triggering to women. Not triggering, just completely irrelevant and incorrect. Are we not allowed to disagree with something in our own sub without being accused of being "triggered"? Women simply hate it. Even if it's good information, they see it more as criticism versus useful information. No, it's just objectively wrong. Can you see the difference between disagreeing with something and rejecting it out of som…
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/18 06:54 PM
2

Well that loss of attraction is a much bigger deal than who pursues who. Why do you think you lost attraction to these guys? What's the common thread?
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/18 06:43 AM
1

Do the guys you chase usually like you back? If so you're fine.
/r/RedPillWomen25/11/18 12:32 AM
12

Women say they're hornier and enjoy sex more than ever in their mid-30s. I can agree with this because as a mid-30s woman I have personal experience. My sex drive is currently the highest it's ever been, and I enjoy sex more now than I ever have. If Rollo et al want to wring their hands and take that statement as some weird conspiracy to convince men to be more attracted to these older women, then go ahead. Im married with a great sex life, it makes no difference to me if men believe us or not. …
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/18 11:44 PM
14

He's talking about a female experience to women. What do we, as women, have to gain from men telling us how we personally experience sex?
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/18 09:12 PM
8

You tell him thanks, but you're not interested in dating him. Then you go find someone else.
/r/RedPillWomen20/11/18 09:07 AM
1

We're giving out stars for snarky comments now? :/
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/18 12:20 AM
10

i can't believe this needs to be said. he's asking her to forgo probably the most important rite of passage that a woman will ever experience AND any control over her own children, but he made her a cabinet so fair's fair? girl no.
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/18 08:44 PM
25

That's fair enough, but if you're that concerned about the effects of pregnancy, you're probably not ready for the effects of parenthood.
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/18 10:40 AM
2

We lived with my MIL for a month while our place was being renovated. It was actually really nice spending lots of time together, but only because we knew it was limited. You're right though that if the end date keeps getting pushed out there will be issues.
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/18 10:19 AM
13

Tell your boyfriend what you said here. Say that you'd love to live with him, but that you can't move in unless there's a firm timeline on his parents moving out. I also wouldn't want to live with my partner's parents if there wasn't an end date to it.
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/18 01:08 AM
1

Yeah sounds like it
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/18 07:50 AM
1

i come from an upper class background, when i was looking for a husband i was vetting for upper class men. shaming language won't get you far with me.
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/18 11:14 PM
4

Ok I'll tell my niece who was raped by her teacher that. And my friend who was raped by her brother in law. Nothing to fear, girls!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/18 08:30 PM
0

I state random men because that's the norm in the real world. Then don't tell me what I'm talking about, please. I meant what I said, not what you believe to be happening. It's great the upper crust society folks are marrying each other, but I suspect they have interest in who's been out and about as well. Some do, some don't. It's women who seem more irritated by the reality of not getting the man they want - or not getting a man at all. Social media, women's magazines, numerous articles, discu…
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/18 06:40 AM
2

So...in your estimation - women who engage sex with random and numerous men are wife material. Guys just have to suck it up and take the loss...for society's benefit. Got it. where did i say random men? where did i say anything about "society's benefit"? stop putting words in my mouth, please. you've completely missed my point, and i suspect you'd be quicker to get it if you actually read it rather than injecting your own assumptions in there. Don't look now, but fewer and fewer men are willing …
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/18 03:02 AM
6

They hang out in women's groups on reddit apparently
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 11:34 PM
1

Yep, and women have to lower their standards because there aren't enough hot surgeons to go around. That's just life. We all have our ideals, very few people end up with them. In my view, cultivating happiness with a real person who you love and loves you back is a sign of good character. Holding out for your unlikely avatar of perfection (be it the virgin or the surgeon) is only going to make you unhappy. I wish every success to the men who decide that they're not going to accept anything less …
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 11:28 PM
2

How would AA be incompatible with RPW? I'd go along a couple more times to see if you have something useful to gain from it.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 09:44 PM
10

I'd take this as a blessing in disguise. You've got the rare opportunity of seeing how your man handles financial decisions prior to entering into marriage with him. He's in his 30s, so unlikely to change in this regard. I'd take this new information seriously and consider whether he's a good choice for marriage. Disagreements over money are a huge factor in divorce.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 09:42 PM
2

No.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 06:38 PM
7

It was more than 1 or 2 men in my past, and my husband's attitude is more common than you'd expect. Your preferences are your own, plenty of men feel differently.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 12:17 PM
9

Exactly. Giving life, but also nurturing life, compromise, devotion, selflessness, humility, are all very feminine traits. I know many women who have gracefully held their families together when pride was tearing them apart. Appreciating a strong male headship in our own homes does not require us to forget all of the different power we hold as woman.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 10:13 AM
5

Because he told me explicitly that this was the reason. He didn't want a pure, virginial girl, he wanted someone more experienced without the hangups. Don't fall into the trap of thinking that what's ideal for you is ideal for every man.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 09:55 AM
10

Yeah I've lost all interest in engaging with you on this. I come here to talk with like-minded women, not play "girls r dum".
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 09:53 AM
4

That same study also states that the worst outcomes are correlated with young wives. I don't see these guys jumping to wife up post wall women, do you?
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 08:52 AM
6

There is feminine power removed from "you go girl" feminism
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 08:29 AM
2

femininity can be very powerful in its own way. it doesn't have to have anything to do with your dynamic with a man, however.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 06:13 AM
2

men who care that much about virginity are very welcome to seek it and place those requirements. i don't think anyone's trying to change their minds. the fact is, though, that almost no-one marrying today, bar the very religious, are marrying as virgins. either men don't care as much as you think they do, or there aren't enough virgin women to go around. if it's the latter, then i would posit that it is in fact unreasonable to expect a virgin. you can have all the expectations and demands in the…
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 06:06 AM
8

the men who hang out in this sub will probably say that if a man doesn't ask it's because he's been conditioned not to, or because he thinks you'll lie anyway. i disagree with this. it may be true for that particular type of man, but there are absolutely high value men out there who don't desire purity in the same way the men here do. like you say, they may not want to take on an ex-prostitute, but i think for plenty of men the n-count just isn't that big a deal outside of the extreme fringe cas…
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 05:21 AM
17

I don't, but I do pay attention to the seasons/moon cycles to an almost pagan extent. I celebrate equinoxes and solstices and enjoy being in touch with that part of myself that responds to cycles and nature.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 03:58 AM
9

Oh I know, it doesn't bother me what the guys say. I just think it's a shame when I see girls reading that and trying to stifle their natural femininity as a result.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 03:10 AM
10

Spot on :) I had a very similar realization. I see some girls in here ironically shying away from true femininity when they start reading TRP and all the awful anecdotes in there. They'll dress up pretty and act submissively, but deny all of the other power and beauty that comes along with being a woman.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 02:29 AM
13

this is a great start We are women and we have a female nature. This nature is inherently different from male nature and gives us our own strengths and our own weaknesses. This nature, this being woman, is not inherently bad nor is in inherently good. It simply is. These are our rules and it is our sonnet to write. Trying to break these rules means playing at being men and we fail at this. We make poor men, but we have the opportunity to make excellent women. ... We have been taught to deny our …
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 12:18 AM
16

in my experience, there are two "brands" of high value men. there's the more tradcon, old fashioned type who prefers a very low count in a woman. whether or not the man is religious, i feel that this mentality is a leftover from the abrahamic ideas of purity and cleanliness. you see very strong themes of sexual purity in christianity, islam, judaism, etc. even if a man is an atheist, america is a culturally christian country, with many of our subconscious desires and beliefs stemming from this. …
/r/RedPillWomen11/11/18 10:03 PM
6

in my experience, there are two "brands" of high value men. there's the more tradcon, old fashioned type who prefers a very low count in a woman. whether or not the man is religious, i feel that this mentality is a leftover from the abrahamic ideas of purity and cleanliness. you see very strong themes of sexual purity in christianity, islam, judaism, etc, and even if a man is an atheist, america is a culturally christian country, with many of our subconscious desires and beliefs stemming from th…
/r/RedPillWomen11/11/18 09:59 PM
2

Why don't you take responsibility for it and just not nag him? Do you not have shared accounts?
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/18 10:15 AM
5

Yeah, totally. Before you're super invested in each other you can be very matter of fact. It was just like "this is what I have planned for my future, what about you?"
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 08:10 PM
11

My husband comes from old money and a family that carries a bit of a legacy. People from his world always marry, it would be really strange not to. He spoke quite openly about marriage/children in a hypothetical way quite early, to make sure that I was on the same page. He was ready to find his wife, so in his mind there was no point even dating me if I didn't have the same future in mind.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 07:21 PM
11

Is this a transition that needs to happen? I know Laura Doyle recommends handing finances over, but it isn't law. I manage the finances in our household because I have the time and the attention to devote to it. If you're better at running the finances and it wasn't causing any issues in the first place, why are you trying to change it?
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 09:27 AM
13

Clubbing every weekend at 26 would be a worry for me. Clubbing is very much a single person activity in my mind - all about booze, dancing, meeting the opposite sex. Regardless, it sounds like you have completely different ways of enjoying yourselves, and if he's not happy to meet you half way then I can't see your relationship being a happy one. I would let him know your concerns in a calm, rational manner, and explain that in order to be happy in the relationship you need to be able to spend t…
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 01:28 AM
2

Thanks! :) That's helpful
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 12:25 AM
1

Ok, thanks. That makes sense. Still learning the ropes here and was curious if there is standard RPW advice on these things, or if it's just personal.
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/18 11:18 PM
1

So should a woman be verbally clear about seeking marriage/commitment? If so, when?
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/18 09:51 PM
0

I've seen whisper explicitly shoot down the cow/milk for free thing saying that men don't work that way. Ive also seen him say that talking about your goals to make sure they align counts as "the talk". Would be interested to see his take on it. I've just been lurking for a while and it's confusing when the ECs seem to be giving contradictory advice.
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/18 08:59 PM
0

One way to avoid this is to be upfront about your desires for a LTR/marriage from the get-go and to not engage in any sexual activity until that's been settled. Not sure /u/whisper would agree with this. I thought we were supposed to not have "the talk", but use sex to get to commitment?
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/18 08:06 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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