~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 37 | How can I know if someone is truly nice to me?I think the golden rule for any relationship is reciprocity. Are they putting in the same effort you are? Are they matching your vibe? There are some relationships that are friendly but shallow, and that is OK. Not everybody are made to be besties. There are some relationships that burn bright and run their course, and that is OK. Sometimes people align at a certain time in their life, and then things change and everyone moves on. What’s NOT okay is when one person takes advantage of another’s d… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/04/22 06:42 PM |
| 41 | i can’t take this relationship anymoreThese people are literal strangers to you. Yes, even the ones you met. They don’t know you from a hole in the ground. Their opinion of you has no weight. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/22 05:55 PM |
| 18 | The amount of pickmes on reddit is too highIt’s like how all the staunch defenders of Will Smith’s actions at the Oscars I know of are women who say they want a man to protect them that way. I see even LV men ragging on Smith for being thin skinned and most well adjusted folks I known recognize defending your partner is good but excessive force and violence is bad. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/22 05:31 PM |
| 71 | Have you ever witnessed/experiences a LVM turn to a HVM?My husband had a fucked up time in his early teens, but by the time we met and subsequently got together (at 23) he had stopped with the drugs and porn and when he told me on the first date he wanted to wait to have sex until he knew we were in it for the long term, it was because he had experience with confusing love for horniness and regretted hurting those women in the past. I think what dragged him down were the environment and people he was around (he was doing drugs, having sex, and watchi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/22 02:13 AM |
| 39 | Women who have high body counts because they want to, or because of the amount of promiscuous men who lie about their intentions?I was in camp A. In the year I was single after my college boyfriend and I broke up and before meeting my now husband, I had sex with nearly two dozen new men. Most of them were men I had known for years, only a handful of them were random dates from Tinder. I will say that I got tired of the novelty very quickly. After sleeping with a new guy every week for a couple of months, I was tired of the neggers and the beggars who were demanding I treat them like a boyfriend instead of someone I went o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 12:01 AM |
| 26 | Anyone else feel like there is A LOT missing from this story??“Engagement ring for sale” Is this on a Feb marketplace post???? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/03/22 09:06 PM |
| 142 | How can you tell if "My ex was controlling, abusive, crazy..." etc is the truth from a guy?In my experience, men who were abused don’t badmouth their abusers. I witnessed a very messy couple in my friend group as a teen/early twenties where the woman was legitimately going through some shit and hurting him. It got to the point that after their break up she would use copies of a key he made her to enter his l apartment. I know of this not because the guy badmouthed her and talked about her being crazy, but his roommate showed me the teeth marks where she bit him as he tried to bar her … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/03/22 06:24 PM |
| 21 | Brooklyn 99I like Jake, but he is a mediocre man. Not all LVM are complete monsters, most are just mildly disappointing. Many can have good hearts and intentions like Jake, who is generally very respectful of women and can have strong platonic relationships with women (his friendships with Gina and Rosa show this), but he is also a product of many male stereotypes of being a lazy and irresponsible man child (with his interests and goofing off at work constantly) and dates in the usual low value way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/03/22 05:35 PM |
| 7 | Jealous Tech Scrote Sends Woman's Onlyfans to EmployerProbably this sub; the screenshot of the post was posted here. I am not a Patreon subscriber, so I assume this post is an article breaking it down in fds terms in a more cohesive way than the comments on that post. Edit- not a Patreon subscriber, so I’m not sure if this is the situation they’re talking about in the Patreon, but this is the you mentioned in your comment: https://reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/smvv6f/this_is_why_you_dont_get_an_onlyfans_men_that_you/ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/22 04:39 PM |
| 42 | Proud Of A little Bit Of Progress, I'm Learning How To Say NoCongrats on the progress. Have you blocked and deleted him yet? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/22 04:43 PM |
| 37 | How police officers cheat and vetting strategies to get the truth.Re: lawyers. I worked for my friend’s dad, a successful family attorney who helps so many women and kids out of bad situations and genuinely cares about them when they’re his clients, but in his personal life he is a scrote as heck. As teens we’d hang out at his house because he was always working late, and it was gorgeous and huge. After he divorced friend’s mom, I watched as the place slowly went to hell covered in dog shit and piss because he gave up on training his dogs or cleaning up after … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/22 02:50 AM |
| 71 | This is how "decent" men contribute to the bar being so LOWIf I found out my husband was hiding some scrote’s secret affair/child for him, it’d be grounds for divorce. I hope this guy’s wife gets wind of what he’s willing to hide for some rando at work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 12:23 AM |
| 16 | Feeling loved on this Valentine's day.This has me thinking of the phrase “it’s the thought that counts.” Scrotes will buy a terrible gift, and if you express disappointment, they get defensive that “it’s the thought that counts!” But was that truly thought? Whereas, your partner got you something small and not extravagant, but actually did put in the kind of thought that actually counts. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/22 08:21 PM |
| 4 | What Do You Ladies Think Of The Following Films? | My boyfriend dislikes all of them, but I do find it a bit of a cOiNcIdEnCe that all of them ~happen to have~ female leadsDid it chafe him that Molly is a real person, and she really did play the rich and the famous like that? Molly Bloom is an absolute boss. Random recommendation, if you liked that movie I totally recommend just looking her up and being in awe of her sheer power, specifically I learned about her when she was a guest on this podcast. Link. Edit- Not that I’m advocating for crime, but come on. You’ve got to have some serious skill and gall to end up with the power and influence she had in those circ… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/22 07:22 AM |
| 26 | What Do You Ladies Think Of The Following Films? | My boyfriend dislikes all of them, but I do find it a bit of a cOiNcIdEnCe that all of them ~happen to have~ female leadsMy thoughts: Star Wars VII, VIII, IX (2015, 2017, 2019) The main issue I have with the sequel trilogy is that the first movie they attempt a carbon copy of the first movie (boring sequel idea) but genderswapped (which I think is a really terrible and sad way to introduce leading lady.) It felt very "Let's do A New Hope, but with a woman as Luke because progressive! And because we're too afraid of a woman carrying the story, let's have a token black companion as well, because progressive!" The … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/22 12:59 AM |
| 29 | Discerning high value among the retiredWhat a waste. I’d love to retire at 30 and spend my time learning to paint, volunteering at pet rescue, and getting good at climbing (which I like but takes way too much time I don’t have to develop skill in) while I’m still relatively young and mobile. Maybe get bored of that and try another hobby/volunteer op/sport. Doing nothing but vg’s and porn is mind boggling. But I guess that’s addiction for you. (Ps, I’m glad you’re rid of that scrote.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/22 12:10 AM |
| 11 | How many of you ladies have found HVM since following FDS?I met my partner long before the FDS sub, but this sub helped clarify and crystallize why he makes a good partner. When I met him, I had been going through a reconciling of my pickme phase. Even when I started dating him I put out a lot of pick me feelers, like trying to go 50/50, scared of doing anything to inconvenience him, trying to get into his pants on the first few dates. Instead, he insisted that he always pay—likes to joke about being the Great Provider—and even now buys all the food an… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/02/22 09:47 PM |
| 54 | No words…He probably wouldn’t want more kids if he actually participated in raising them with OP. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/22 02:00 PM |
| 26 | No words…I feel bad for this woman and the puppy. Huskies require so. Much. Attention. My husky baby is well behaved but only when she gets walked for an hour, plays tug for an hour, and gets all the cuddles she demands. So much of my day is devoted to her, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. But if I had the responsibility dumped on me? On top of two kids under 3? With an unsupportive partner? Her life sounds miserable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/22 07:22 AM |
| 1 | FDS Books: On Edith Wharton. (LONG POST!)Edith Wharton is one of my creative writing professors’ favorite novelists, and he said if he were to recommend any one novel ever, it’d be House of Mirth, so she’s been on my to-read list for a while. Thanks for reminding me of her. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 09:26 PM |
| 41 | PSA: Tinder will stop showing your account to people nearby if you're inactive for several days, so don't fall for "I deleted this app ages ago but didn't know I need to deactivate my profile separately!"This lie makes no sense. Tinder has an incentive not to let inactive accounts get put into the pool: they care about only one thing—match rates. If your account isn't getting matches, their algorithm sorts you to a lower tier, to give you a better chance of matching. Keep the number of one sided swipes down. This is a known fact. There was a whole hoopla about how Tinder algorithm sorts people into attractiveness tiers based on number of swipes and matches people get. You can't get matches if yo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 06:21 PM |
| 108 | Does anybody else get tired of fake women's posts undoubtedly written by men?As an Asian American lady... The first thing any of my aunties think about when trying to set me and my cousins up was job (doctor or pharmacist preferred), second was looks (height included). In the more traditional Asian culture of my parents and their friends, it is 100% the norm that the men make the money, the women control the purse strings and manage house. Yeah, there's a lot of tradition-sanctioned spousal abuse too, but at the very least it's not a 50/50 culture. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 05:13 PM |
| 106 | Dirty Talk in the Sheets: Yay or Nay?Depends on the definition of Dirty Talk. Like, my husband and I call cheesy pick up lines dirty talk (dorky example, if I say, I'm getting ready for bed, he'll shoot back something like, I'll get you ready for bed. it's bad. It's funny because it's bad. It endears him to me.), and there are definitely things he can say in bed that get me hot without demeaning me as a person or reducing me to a sex object. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 12:47 AM |
| 22 | Why do men show up to our homes uninvited?Didn’t happen to me but My sisters ex showed up on our doorstep once. I wish Ring doorbell cameras were a thing back then so could have shouted at him from the comfort of my bedroom but alas I had to open the door to tell him to go away. He left a gift for her with me and went away. Straight to the trash. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/01/22 04:43 PM |
| 99 | This poor woman thinks this is funny 😳Got me in the first half… I thought it was cute he went and got her a GOAT trophy, until I scrolled down and read the bottom. On a tangential topic, the disrespect Nancy Reagan got on the Internet last month, dear god. For those who are unaware, the phrase “throat goat” was trending last month after someone’s autobiography mentioned that in her younger actress days, Nancy Reagan had Been known among Hollywood for being good at giving oral sex, and that tidbit was used to humiliate the woman from… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/22 08:22 PM |
| 6 | He’s just like every other man I’ve met, except this one has a working machine of complicit enablers.I saw this in another sub, and one of the other redditors there looked up the author and found she was interning on the play gullenhall was in during the 2015-2016 season. Everything follows from there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/01/22 09:58 PM |
| 5 | He’s just like every other man I’ve met, except this one has a working machine of complicit enablers.Someone in another controversial sub I have a throwaway for (lol) did the detective work of finding the author (since she didn’t write this anonymously) and found out she had interned on the play gyllenhal was in back in the 2015-2016 season. From there everything lines up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/01/22 09:31 PM |
| 12 | Men’s “goofiness” and “clumsiness” is usually just laziness and lack of considerationThat’s disgusting. Assuming he’s at least 10 years old, being so sloppy as to spill sauce while eating dinner is just, no. Accidents happen, sure, but the description of “lovably clumsy” paints a picture. I’m lovable and clumsy, but I know I’m clumsy so I make sure I have napkins on hand at dinner and don’t eat saucy food on the couch, especially someone else’s! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/01/22 09:16 PM |
| 49 | A new low for LVM….I would say that once you go into the territory of harming or murdering, you’re an NVM. Like, LVM are low value, you’re not missing much. ZVM have no value, they have no redeeming qualities. NVM have negative value, they’ll take and they take and they take.. in this case, he took a life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/01/22 02:50 AM |
| 89 | I thought this was a joke but it’s real and disgusting.I think it’s pretty normal for kids to be fascinated with death and destruction, and play around with that kind of thing for a bit in the Sims. Especially so if it’s an emotional outlet. It would be concerning if it was an ongoing thing into adulthood. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 06:24 PM |
| 2 | This 4chan story is fake AF, but if there’s even a grain of truth in it, good on the ex-gf on leveling up!My app is saying this post has 72 comments, but I certainly did not get 72 comment notifications. Some people out there are really pressed about me posting this. But like, if FDS was enough to break up a relationship, it wasn’t a strong relationship anyway. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/01/22 05:14 PM |
| 9 | This 4chan story is fake AF, but if there’s even a grain of truth in it, good on the ex-gf on leveling up!I’ve been on this sub since the beginning and I don’t think I’ll ever move up past Newbie haha. Also, that line is the biggest indication the story (or at least all these overheard details) is fake… FDS is like fight club. We don’t talk about FDS. Not in real life, we know how much people hate us. Let alone a mod going around telling unsympathetic people that they’re an FDS mod. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/01/22 03:28 PM |
| 53 | This 4chan story is fake AF, but if there’s even a grain of truth in it, good on the ex-gf on leveling up!As a side note, I found this trending on popular earlier, and reading the comments on that thread reminded me that it’s important to use a throwaway! There were threads of people who were tracking our movements on Reddit (apparently you can find user overlaps between subs, like x amount of fds subscribers are active in y other subs), and I got my first Reddit cares pm just for re-posting the meme here. Some people out there really hate this sub, so stay safe out there! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/01/22 06:33 AM |
| 52 | How quickly widowers move on from their wives shows that they don't see women as people, just bangmaidsIn contrast, there was an aita post the other day where a widower of 8 months refused to take off his ring and was not looking at dating because he still felt married to her, and the pickme OP of the thread was offended that he was “falsely advertising” that he wasn’t single. So culturally, even if a man does want to stay single and mourn his wife for longer, there’s a societal pressure for them not to and move on sooner rather than later. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/01/22 12:54 AM |
| 15 | Perfect example of men having issues with your pets being a red flag! And this queen response!!!Always choose your pet over a partner!! 1) your pet loves you unconditionally. A partner, even a high value partner, will love you with conditions. 2) you have a moral responsibility to care for your pet; not so with a partner. Your partner should be able to care for itself. 3) you would always resent your partner if you had to give up your pet. 4) a hvm would recognize your pet as important, and he would show it. If he’s an hvm who can’t be with someone with a pet for whatever reason, he would … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/21 09:58 PM |
| 3 | My Friend's Husband is About to Ruin Her Entire Career. This is why you should always be financially independentMany lawyers do free consultations and can give general advice on what to do. If not free, paid consultations with a good attorney would be worth it opposed to no legal consultation at all, and the cost would usually be waived if their services were retained. . A good lawyer would look at this and see an opportunity for the husband to foot the bill. (I worked for a divorce law firm a while back; when husbands try to dick over their wives like this, my bosses would always try to seek that the wiv… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/12/21 03:31 PM |
| 23 | NVM screeching about losing money in a divorce 🤣🤣🤣 get wrecked. They always blame the woman for a failing marriage and make her out to be LaZY as if she did not raise kids and do housework full-time. She DESERVES some equity.Back in the day I remember casually browsing a mens rights activist sub, and a divorce lawyer (not himself an MRA) did an AMA. It was hilarious—the lawyer was out of his depth; they’d ask, why do women fuck men over so much? He’d try to explain the concept of lost opportunity and wages that the alimony system is supposed to be recompense for. Why do men have to pay more child support? Well, because if they aren’t living with the kid and supporting them financially in person, they should be suppo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 07:05 AM |
| 15 | Looking out for women's safety should be the norm.If you can’t/don’t want to watch the news video linked: they say the photo is staged, but the event is real. After bartender kicked out the guy, the woman asked him to pose with the note for the snap, hence how faked this photo looks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/21 07:58 PM |
| 134 | The Truth in the replies to this tweet.In a thread that hit popular last week men were agreeing that women shouldn’t expect men to change. The example used was: when you date a man who plays video games or use porn, don’t expect him to stop just because you’re in a relationship now. And all the men were agreeing; this was like the third highest comment with hundreds of child comments. So which is it, men, accept you as you are, or believe you can do better? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/12/21 03:04 AM |
| 10 | They condition you young.Oh is THAT why I was always assigned seats next to the problematic kids? I remember in the fourth grade being assigned desk partners with a boy who was always super distracting and probably had a crush on me. We had been assigned seats next to each other the year before in another teacher’s classroom. At recess I asked the teacher in private if I could not be seated next to him; she asked me why and I couldn’t really verbalize the vibe I got from him, the best I could do was say I just didn’t li… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/12/21 06:42 PM |
| 2 | My HVM was actually just a golddiggerHopefully the daughters know. But regarding about things being technically her money, if she is 20 and inherits and has all this wealth, a gold digging LVM will be more likely to be able to get her to spend money on him at that age when she might not know better and think lavishing on her bf= love. Waiting until 40 does lessen the risk, IMO. Then again, her dear dad is probably betting on living long enough to see her turn 40 anyway, so hopefully wouldn’t have to run into such an inheritance pro… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/12/21 06:22 AM |
| 2 | I have no wordsOmg this is really bad…. 🤦♀️ I haven’t watched the show in years, so I was going off my memory… I googled to check and it’s that the character was named Zoe, not the actor. Will edit. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/12/21 05:45 AM |
| 185 | You really are the prize. Don’t let the media and the patriarchy convince you otherwise.You are the prize When my now-husband and I first announced our engagement, my future-father-in-law congratulated him, then turned to me and told me he’s happy for me—but he wouldn’t congratulate me because congratulations are traditionally reserved for the men because the lady is the prize and the man is the lucky one. I totally butchered the delivery of the line, but it was a reality nice sentiment that falls in line with FDS. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/21 09:29 PM |
| 88 | I have no wordsPoc with curly or kinky hair was my first thought. This is a storyline in the show This is Us with Zoe Kravitz’s character the character Zoe with a silk pillow case, but her white boyfriend at least respected her when she explained her silk pillow case was important to her. edit: misremembered the character’s name as the actors name.🤦♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/21 03:32 PM |
| 85 | Men will do anything for sex (except actually put in effort): A refresher course on the DENNIS systemDennis is an awful, terrible person who is supposed to be so over-the-top narcissistic and rapey that no one can relate; the premise of the show is that these characters are bad people, and when bad things happen to them, you can cheer for that. The DENNIS pick-up system is supposed to be so evil that it's hard to miss. Problem is that there really are people narcissistic and rapey enough to aspire to Dennis' cruelty. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 04:10 PM |
| 27 | FDS Approved Fictional Book Recommendations“Most books on witchcraft will tell you that witches work naked. This is because most books on witchcraft are written by men.” Good omens, co-written by Terry Prachett. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 03:46 AM |
| 35 | From the recent Keanu Reeves feature in Esquire. Men of value are thoughtful and generous. Be like Keanu.Yeah! Looks like it was last used a year and a half ago. It was used for posts that would now be categorized as “green flags” or “how to high value.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/11/21 08:38 PM |
| 137 | From the recent Keanu Reeves feature in Esquire. Men of value are thoughtful and generous. Be like Keanu.Like, with any other guy buying flowers and wine for a female friend/colleague while about to go on a date with someone else, I’d assume he’s triangulating. But in the benefit of hindsight knowing Sandra Bullock had a huge crush on him at the time and rues the fact that nothing happened between them and is still so friendly about him indicates that he didn’t use this as a pick up tactic. He just genuinely is Like That. I’m sure he’s not absolutely perfect, but he’s absolutely a great role model. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/11/21 03:45 PM |
| 182 | From the recent Keanu Reeves feature in Esquire. Men of value are thoughtful and generous. Be like Keanu.I didn’t realize the Keanu flair was retired! I guess “how to high value” is close enough. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/11/21 06:50 AM |
| 7 | LVM blocked by ex decides to plaster self-indulgent hoover letter all over her new neighbourhood (French)Thanks! My French is v rusty, and also academic so a lot of idioms go over my head. Thank you for the much more thorough version! The cliches abound though. He sounds like he’s trying to be super poetic or something but also he’s just a gross scrote. Laughable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 05:44 AM |
| 9 | LVM blocked by ex decides to plaster self-indulgent hoover letter all over her new neighbourhood (French)He says it's been years. YEARS!! Yikes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/21 11:12 PM |
| 16 | LVM blocked by ex decides to plaster self-indulgent hoover letter all over her new neighbourhood (French)My french is rusty, and I'm pretty sure it's not going to be worth it, but I might as well get in some practice. "ALICE READ THIS LETTER PLEASE I have tried to forget you in other arms, in other sheets. I've also come sometimes, to discover anew a type of freedom. A gentle lightness. I don't hide from you that alcohol's been helping me a lot. I've been lying to myself. To my friends, my family, my conquests. Everyone who knows of my road [note, I think he's talking about his struggles?] For some… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/21 09:37 PM |
| 22 | LVM blocked by ex decides to plaster self-indulgent hoover letter all over her new neighbourhood (French)“ALICE READ THIS LETTER PLEASE” … I didn’t get any any further than that omg the poor woman. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/21 06:28 PM |
| 6 | Is Taylor Swift a “Forever Girlfriend”This is going off-topic, but it's a good study on having a critical eye for FDS themes in media. Cornelia Street starts with her quote “casually” inviting the muse of the song to come up to her apartment, by the bridge she thinks she's being played and is about to walk out, but gets convinced to come back. Cornelia Street has a happy ending, but the beginning is still very not FDS approved. Delicate - Do the girls back home touch you like I do? - Stay here honey, I don't want to share. - Is it c… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/21 06:27 PM |
| 20 | Is Taylor Swift a “Forever Girlfriend”According to the Cornelia Street, Cruel Summmer on Lover, and Delicate, king of My Heart, and bunch of other songs on Reputation, they started out as a hook up / friends with benefits type situation. She probably dramatized the relationship for the purpose of making compelling music, but there’s a common thread through all these songs of being casual and basically begging for the other person to be committed to her. Is all very low value. Killer songs though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/21 06:59 PM |
| 14 | Is Taylor Swift a “Forever Girlfriend”Joe writing exile and Betty under William Bowery is different than him being a producer on enough songs to get him the Grammy. If he really produced all those other songs, William Bowery would have been credited on them. But he wasn’t, which means they’ve added his name on the other songs to receive the aoty Grammy that is not rightfully his. If he was HV, he wouldn’t ask for it or want it or even accept it. If she did it so he could win an award that is not rightfully his, for whatever reason, … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/21 06:41 PM |
| 24 | Is Taylor Swift a “Forever Girlfriend”There’s a theory that I’m pretty sure I believe that Joe and Taylor are in a purely PR relationship and the songs she’s written and attributed to him are for someone else she actually wants to keep secret. There are a few reasons why I think that theory holds weight, but I’m not gonna dive into them. It’s true she basically bought him a Grammy though. Months after she won album of the year last year, she got him added as a producer on most of the songs on the album, making him eligible to get a … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/21 04:52 PM |
| 29 | Car mechanics need to respect professional boundaries“Just fell out of his pocket?” He has his number on a slip of paper saying text me in his pocket?? For what reason ??? Anyway hope his fiancée wises up. You did a good service. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/21 02:36 AM |
| 21 | HVM tried to give sound advice to a young single mother in distress and got so much hate from RedditHe didn’t even shame her! He’s just saying his stepson and men like him suck and she deserves better?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/10/21 03:31 PM |
| 1 | So, how’s it going these days now that you have to make women like you to get their interest? Men:Trademark symbol. Here’s how you would type it on a computer https://www.alt-codes.net/trademark_alt_code.php, or if you’re on a phone you can search “tm” in emoji keyboard. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/10/21 03:47 PM |
| 46 | My coworkerEh, 1) that’s true. Less true in my office where there are 8 men out of the 30+ people, and he’s the only man on our side of the office (back when we were in the office. 2) I’d be more worried about this guy trying to find a side piece if he actually tried initiating personal conversations, besides the friendly inquiries about my wedding planning when that was happening. 3) I don’t think so, I’m just feeling mushy right now because our mentor/ manager just left our group and we just had a get to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 06:15 AM |
| 50 | My coworkerYeah, that’s why I tagged this post as “green flag” instead of hvm, and didn’t label himself as hvm in the post. I was inspired to make a green flag post after seeing another one today, so I wanted to share some more green flag stories. I know the type you’re talking about; my dad is one. People at church or the Red Cross always tell me how kind and selfless he is, but they don’t know he physically hit us and my mom when we were kids and he always always proud we would come with him to his frien… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 05:56 AM |
| 4 | 👀 Was not expecting to find FDS in the wild while engaging in some guilty pleasure anime watching. Even gamer nerd Hirotaka knows a walk is not a date!I’ve only seen the first few episodes, but I’d recommend Wave! Listen to me! Slice of life about a woman who becomes a radio show host. She’s got a strong personality and is dealing with the aftermath of a breakup and she’s getting over her LVM ex. There’s one ep where she spends time with her LVX that really reminded me of this sub. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 05:30 AM |
| 12 | An Ex bf keeps looking at my LinkedIn profileIt’s such terrible design that I can’t do it directly from the who viewed your profile page. I took your suggestion though. Thanks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/21 01:56 AM |
| 49 | An Ex bf keeps looking at my LinkedIn profileLinkedIn is the worst social network lol. At least it lets you know how they found you. I recently have been haunted by the ghost of bad hookups past—this guy I went to high school with that I hooked up with just after returning to my hometown after college. I did not want anything with him but to blow off steam; he started texting me good mornings and good nights until I broke it off flat out telling him that I was done with him. Blocked his Facebook, deleted the messages. A couple years later … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 10:39 PM |
| 7 | Don’t get roped into talking about the break-up. There are no good intentions. Either he wants to “win” the break-up or he wants to coax you into a situationship with less boundaries. He is not your counselor. He is not here to process with you.What’s funny is that he was the one who broke up with her in this instance according to the first paragraph in her post, he told her she didn’t check all the boxes. She was confused when he came back and wanted to talk about it more in detail… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 04:51 PM |
| 23 | What are our thoughts on this culture of rushing into marriageI saw this on Instagram and then scrolled through some of her reels. On the surface they look pretty cute, but a lotta red flags… there’s one where she is putting herself down because he said he would have dated her in high school, but then she thinks he wouldn’t have because he was pretty much a male model in high school and she had, gasp, braces, and didn’t know how to do her hair and make up yet. Another frequent joke in their reels is that he really wants to have kids but she’s on the fence … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/21 05:50 AM |
| 15 | There’s no way these ladies are serious…🙃Lol even with my college ex we’d go do laundry at the same time (we didn’t do each other’s laundry) and we’d hang out while waiting for our clothes to dry, but that was never a date… it was just something we had to get done so let’s do it together… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/21 06:56 PM |
| 3 | How Women as a Class Are Financially and Fiscally Gaslit in the OfficeI work in local government, not a lawyer but have worked with our counsel on contracts, so I know the type. Working for the government, no matter what the profession, is different from the private sector because, for the most part, the politics about getting clients for billing, becoming firm partners to make more money, and even negotiating for raises simply don’t exist in the government sector (or at least in organizations I’ve worked and applied for), so I think that would explain the above c… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/09/21 06:34 PM |
| 9 | Coworker wanted to set me up with her son.Oh god one of the older ladies in my office tried to set up me and my LVM work partner. She had just finished training us on some process we were new to, and then we went out for lunch where we made casual conversation about idk… do you plan on having children?? And she made some kind of remark along the lines of how most of our coworkers met their spouses at work…. It was very awkward for a minute there. We just kind of ignored her comment. The LVM work partner was in a committed relationship a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/09/21 07:03 PM |
| 11 | Apparently having an emergency savings fund as a woman and not explicitly saying so to your male partner is “financial infidelity.” 🤨🙄Same. Joint account for bills and expenses, separate accounts for our own spending. He isn’t even a beneficiary to the personal account; if I die, he can have what’s in our joint account and his community property of my investments, but the rest is going to my family. He knows all this and is unbothered. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/21 03:44 PM |
| 1 | Men Who live With Parents or RoommatesI’m from a traditional ethnic enclave where it is absolutely normal for adult children to live with their parents unless they absolutely had to move for work or until they’re married or with someone they want to marry. So someone living with their parents at 30 is not a big deal, it really depends on how he’s living with them. This guy I know, for example, was living with his parents until he moved out with his fiancée. He took care of his parents in a lot of ways, was clean and helpful around t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/21 03:25 PM |
| 2 | Men on reddit advising women to talk it out after a male slaps them during sex (without their consent) is this normal?An HVM would never. An LV but generally decent guy would at least ask if slapping is a thing you’re into before doing it in bed. Non consensual slapping is something LV and not so decent guy or NVM waiting to escalate to abuse. Slapping is super common in porn and I get the impression it’s super common in modern dating as well. I’m on tumblr and come across teenagers joking about slapping and choking all the time and it’s disturbing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/21 03:18 PM |
| 14 | Where is the lie, tho?Loved it. Don’t ever look up fan art or merch for it. Too much of it is weirdly sexual. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/21 02:20 PM |
| 61 | Where is the lie, tho?It’s such a shame because there are a lot of great animes that are about high school students, aimed towards a demo of high school students and are pretty cute and innocent. I catch the occasional romcom for the nostalgia feels of more innocent times. Only thing is that if I google a show, the fandom tends to be corrupted because most of the people in the west watching these are… well, you know the type. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/21 05:33 AM |
| 54 | Ask Amy: After husband announces relationship with a 19-year-old, it’s time to talk to an attorneyWell considering they “met online” and 19 year old has never met him and he “helps her out” by sending money, I think the writer is assuming the online gf a catfish scam, which is really prevalent. Not that I have much sympathy for being scammed, but the fact that it hurts how wife financially is no bueno. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/21 06:37 PM |
| 35 | For women of color/ minorities, be extra careful of fetishization or familial racismAlso to fetishists supposedly every woman in their target race is sensual. Disgusting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/21 04:56 AM |
| 7 | 20 Things to Think About When Dating a Man Who Games 🎮P.S. Your title clearly says “Dating a Gamer”. IJS… If you’re going to call out somebody on a technicality, her post title is “20 things to think about when dating a man who games 🎮” ijs We’re all just quibbling about semantics here and seem to be in agreement that gamer-identifying addicts and misogynists are not cool even if we ourselves play games. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/21 04:06 AM |
| 45 | 20 Things to Think About When Dating a Man Who Games 🎮To add to my previous comments, The way I see it, most men are LVM trash anyway, whether or not they play video games. Gamers are just more obvious about their type of low value. If video games aren’t your scene, there’s no need to vet for gaming tendencies beyond do they play games or not. But for those of us who do enjoy games or are recovering gamer pickmes, it’s important to be able to recognize proper gaming/life balance when you see it. And this list is great for that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 10:18 PM |
| 23 | 20 Things to Think About When Dating a Man Who Games 🎮To be fair, you are right about those. These ones didn’t even cross my mind when I was writing my comment from before. If those were the games my partner was into playing, I would likely not be with him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 08:37 PM |
| 29 | 20 Things to Think About When Dating a Man Who Games 🎮There are also many games that are mentally stimulating and educational, that have literary qualities on par with generally acceptable literature. I’m not saying Final Fantasy is on par with the great epics of our time, but many of the games in the series is surely on similar level to the mass market fantasy series I’m found of reading, and very much have the aspect of social intelligence when the stories are generally character driven and the characters have motivations and backgrounds. TellTal… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 08:15 PM |
| 79 | 20 Things to Think About When Dating a Man Who Games 🎮Thanks for this list. I know many women have a No Gamer preference, but that’s a preference, not an FDS standard. I honestly think most people who identify as a “gamer” and make it a part of their personality is LV, but gaming as a free time thing is not so different from reading or watching tv shows. My husband includes me when he plays video games, we play co-op games or adventure games mostly, and I’m always given priority any time of any day and first pick of entertainment. He plays maybe a … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 06:33 PM |
| 2 | How do you feel about video games?Your standard is valid. There are way too many games these days that are designed to be addictive, and you know the type who are absolutely addicted. Also it’s no fun to date someone who doesn’t value being in the real world the way you do. Almost all guys who are in tech are videogamers; they go hand in hand due to video games being the gateway for many young programmers to get into coding. if you don’t want to date them, just don’t. That said, it’s not a dealbreaker for me, personally, if play… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 05:26 PM |
| 1 | I always wanted a platinum engagement ring, my bf agreed. Then he saw this video and messaged me "now you're getting a diamond ring"Glad to hear. Plus the fact that he was randomly watching this scene from this episode of a show that ended a decade ago?? Seems pretty purposeful to me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 03:01 PM |
| 4 | I always wanted a platinum engagement ring, my bf agreed. Then he saw this video and messaged me "now you're getting a diamond ring"I’m thinking/hoping (because this is what my husband would do) that maybe he knew he wanted to get her a ring with a stone in it and this is a funny way of conveying to her his intention for it; since OP states she wanted to get a band only out of practicality, in this episode the diamond is practical, so it’s speaking to her previously stated reasoning for not wanting a stone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/08/21 07:06 PM |
| 3 | No. No thank you. Please don't. Don't give stalkers more toolsYou don’t have to theorize, that’s exactly what Clearview AI is. It’s been around for a few years now and has been in the news more and more often. As for the news “trying to warm people up to the idea it’s a “good” thing”, each story I’ve read about Clearview is very not happy about the mass surveillance and privacy implications of it. The article in OP is a plain news article so it pretty factually states what the Clearview is working on, then quotes people speaking on the reasons why it’s pro… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 07:01 PM |
| 11 | No. No thank you. Please don't. Don't give stalkers more toolsCleaview’s primary market is government contracts. Supposedly to help with law enforcement. So for example, if you’ve ever heard the rumor that during Black Lives Matter protests, law enforcement were tracking down people on Facebook? Well, it’s not a rumor; Clearview AI was giving out free trials to law enforcement to help identify people from photos of protestors and connect them with their facebooks and twitters. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 08:23 AM |
| 3 | No. No thank you. Please don't. Don't give stalkers more toolsJohn Oliver had a story a while ago about Clearview AI and it’s government contracts. It’s horrifying. https://youtu.be/jZjmlJPJgug | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 08:11 AM |
| 13 | Never stay in a doomed relationship for too long.I wish I knew this back in college. Wasted a good two years in the most mediocre relationship, thinking that well, it’s not bad enough to break up and the fact we don’t spend time together just gives me more time for my friends! When I could have been single and done all the same with slightly less stress. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/21 10:45 PM |
| 3 | In a Happy Relationship with my Twin Flame and Wanted to Share…My puppy does the same. She gets me out of bed 4:30 in the morning while husband sleeps peacefully next to me and won’t let me get away until she’s fed, walked, and played catch for half an hour. I went out of town and came back worried she would have been looking for me every morning but husband was like, Nah we slept in till 7~ 🤷🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/21 05:37 PM |
| 34 | Pickmes move like they are the exception and not the ruleEven with the good guys though, it’s a pretty well known phenomena that men who sleep with someone before forming a real attachment will often lose interest in their partner. I remember listening to this relationship scientist on a podcast doing a q&a and plenty of guys were writing in saying they were confused to why they lost interest in a woman after sex, and she was advising them to wait for sex for that very reason. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/21 11:13 PM |
| 28 | After being told by men more than once that my standards were "too high", last weekend I got given the proposal and ring of my dreams by a man who meets those standards!They said there are plenty of nice guys out there, faith doesn't really matter etc... If not serious about faith, why on faith-based dating site? 🧐 Congratulations! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/21 09:04 PM |
| 5 | SNOOPING 101Exactly what I’m saying. In my case, from our early days of dating my partner had no qualms registering my finger print on his phone and me using it even if I have my actual phone in my other hand. If I were to be single again, I think the same openness to his things would be a must for me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/21 08:59 PM |
| 13 | SNOOPING 101I asked to play with his phone because I left mine in my bag and his is right there on the table, so after I asked to use his phone, he gave me his passcode no problem. I’m not particularly a fan of snooping, but that’s mostly because my partner willingly gave me access to everything from the start. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/21 02:24 PM |
| 39 | [SPOILERS] Suicide Squad 2: Harley Quinn goes FDS!Compared to the first suicide squad, Harley’s treatment in this one is so much better. No ass shots of her in booty shorts. She’s fully clothed the whole movie, even before and after she has a (99%off screen) sex scene, and even when she gets all muddied and her dress gets torn up during her fights. They removed a lot of her tattoos with little fanfare (Robbie and Gunn both hated the “rotten” face tattoo, so they got rid of it; her back tatt now says “Property of No One.” Her side quest on her o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/21 03:22 AM |
| 43 | "I went to a doctor and he said it's normal because I'm stressed all the time!"Lol my ex said it was all the stress; he was in his uni senior year doing mechanical engineering and captain of the robotics team, and he was doing hours of i homework and studying every night. And then one night after a failed seduction, I wake up and he’s watching porn at his desk a few feet away from me. Luckily I never internalized it as a problem with me being desirable (I have always had too high self esteem for that), but it was upsetting all the same that he chose to do that instead. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/21 09:08 PM |
| 16 | Platonic LVM at Work: their true colours always show - a cautionary taleI’m getting pissed off again about the memo thing. I told him off and didn’t speak to him for two days. He tried to apologize to me by leaving Oreos on my desk as a present despite the fact that I had previously told him I don’t particularly like Oreos. If you’re going to make a peace offering, at least make it something I’d like! I did get him to pay for my portion at our next weekly lunch out with the work group, and it happened to be sushi so score~ But he did basically the same thing two wee… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/21 07:17 PM |
| 23 | Platonic LVM at Work: their true colours always show - a cautionary taleI started at my current org at the same time as this guy. We were the same entry level position so we did basically everything together—all our orientations, training, and shared a lot of work projects. He wasn’t terrible at his job, but over time I realized that I could run circles around him. After our work started diverging (I was given more data drive projects while he was given more compliance related projects) he would come over and ask me for assistance. Then he would either not do what I… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/21 06:53 PM |
| 31 | I did it, thanks to FDSGood. Nice clean break. Good luck!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/08/21 06:47 AM |
| 11 | LVM doesn't want women to be happyAbout your caption, I would say he’s less than an LVM. More of a Negative Value Man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/21 07:51 PM |
| 3 | She says she hopes she won’t have to deal with this for years to come… sadly, she’s likely mistakenI tell people all the time loudly and proudly that my husband (we got married last year) will get his 50% community property from the date we married if I kick the bucket, and no more. My siblings are equal share beneficiaries on my condo I had before we married and all my investments. A lot of people think that's messed up, but my husband's a good match for me bc he thinks it's fair. I've been the beneficiary on all his accounts for years though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/08/21 12:34 AM |
| 18 | The Manic Pixie Dream Girl, the Bechdel Test, and other LV Hollywood tropesSo I think you are mischaracterizing the Bechdel test… it’s not really a trope that is actively applied to media, it’s just some thing that a woman comic artist once thought of… she thought, why don’t we see women talking about anything other than men? So it’s pointing out an already existing phenomena, not acting as a trope in itself. You would really like the YouTube channel The Take, where they talk about all sorts of tropes like these. Edit: oh here’s one. Stalking is romantic or nice guy tr… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/21 05:21 PM |
| 4 | It baffles me why men who complain about FDS think they are the type of men we want in the first place. Male biological delusion is realI find it hilarious that the writer closes off that topic with the line "The conversation hangs in the air more than a little." ... yeah, that's awkward. re: the media: To be fair, there was a backlash at the time, and he made a press statement apologizing for it. I think because he responded quickly, and he was on a press tour at the time, it got forgotten quickly. I just wanted to apologise for any confusion and misunderstanding that this may have created. Insensitivity was absolutely not my i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/06/21 02:33 PM |
| 27 | It baffles me why men who complain about FDS think they are the type of men we want in the first place. Male biological delusion is realthere's something very icky exuding from his eyes. Quote of the year. Thanks for the laugh! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/06/21 11:45 PM |
| 168 | It baffles me why men who complain about FDS think they are the type of men we want in the first place. Male biological delusion is realIt’s very difficult to [chase a woman] if there are certain rules in place. Because then it’s like: ‘Well, I don’t want to go up and talk to her, because I’m going to be called a rapist or something’. - Henry Cavill on dating The scrotes really vibe with him on that, plus he's probably the hottest gamer on the planet. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/06/21 08:05 PM |
| 71 | They settle down when they get old. #geriatricHe looked the same for like two decades and suddenly he looks 72. I looked it up and he’s only 60! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/06/21 04:16 PM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-InGood luck!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/06/21 08:30 PM |
| 15 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-InRe: shallon Lester. Not gonna lie, didn’t hear about her until after people started talking about how toxic she was, so I was biased from the beginning. That said, she’s a celebrity gossip columnist who, as gossip columnists do, speculates loudly about the inner details of celebrities lives with the barest of details, which is extremely low value both as a career and a habit. And also she is predatory towards teenage boys. Not sure if she is as loud about it now, but in the late 00’s she was on … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/06/21 03:29 PM |
| 10 | From Bo Burnham's poetry bookI wasn’t even aware this would even be up for debate; have seen many variations of this post on real Facebook and Instagram posts and that phrasing 💯 means that both people are passed away, with the person posting hoping they’re together in the afterlife. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/21 12:16 AM |
| 33 | From Bo Burnham's poetry bookBo Burnham is definitely someone who you can see change and grow through the output in his career. There are some early jokes he made in his teen year YouTube videos and even his earliest Netflix special when he was 23 that are...not the best, but by his last stand up special and his newest one you can tell he’s very much matured as a person. The biggest example of how this guy is great at listening and respecting the experience of others, especially women, is his writing/directorial debut Eight… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/06/21 03:44 PM |
| 6 | Am I the only one who thinks that doesn't sound healthy? ...maybe I'm misunderstanding it?Seems unhealthy to me... With past partners I was always anxious and second guessing myself. But with my current partner, I’ve known where I stood from the start. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 11:40 PM |
| 2 | Wooderson's Law (from Dataclysm by Christian Rudder)Masie was 21 when she had her sex scene, but she looks young still, and I can’t think of another time when Arya was undressed for the show? But I may be miss remembering. The thing is that men liked Arya and tended to feel very protective of her... but they hated Sansa, and i feel a lot of them perverse pleasure in the scene where Joffrey had her stripped and whipped (actress was like 17 give or take for that scene). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 11:25 PM |
| 21 | Knock it tf off, pickmeisha 🤡🤡 That’s where these women have it wrong. Money and material are how men demonstrate their love and support. How else is he meant to show it? He’s got to put his money where his mouth is. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/21 05:01 AM |
| 105 | He Who Poops In The Shower.... RUN!Honestly, it’s weird af but it’s common enough that I’ve heard of these people and there are jokes about it. In a Reddit thread the other day on the Japanese toilet that has a hand rinsing sink on the toilet tank, one joke thread went from “just pee in the shower and wash your hands” to “just poop in the shower and do the waffle stomp.” Clearly a joke mocking the idea, but also it was familiar enough to have a nickname for pushing a turd down the shower drain?!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/06/21 08:12 AM |
| 96 | PLEASE be careful and delete or password protect any explicit photos or videos on your devicesIn a Reddit post about iPhone girl, a few posters chimed in that they once worked at computer repair or phone stores and the stealing and sharing of nudes is rampant behind the scenes. Don’t even trust Verizon sales person when they’re taking your phone to the back to transfer data to a new phone. Thankfully it’s easier these days to transfer your phone information yourself, but then most people are relying on cloud service backups which are hack able. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/21 04:12 PM |
| 19 | In case you forgot that being nice to men will get you literally nowhere, here's a tiktok with 2 million likes to remind you.I’m short and honestly do prefer short men, but not short men with a chip on their shoulder. That’s why I’m married to a tall guy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 02:34 PM |
| 10 | I dont understand what happened with this guyTo add to my previous comment: Go back to the FDS handbook and read everything over again, specifically the sections about vetting, consistent effort, and the parts about LVM. Your questions here make it clear you need a refresher. If you lurk enough male subreddits or talk to enough men, you’ll know that most men will NOT straight out say they’re not interested because that cuts you off as an option for later, when they can’t find anyone better. Don’t put too much stock into people watching you… | /r/askFDS | 17/05/21 04:42 PM |
| 9 | Can this be worked on?The worst part about the sex is that he couldn’t be bothered to help finish you off. At 35, he should be aware enough about sexuality for that. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks; I say move on. | /r/askFDS | 17/05/21 04:25 PM |
| 20 | I dont understand what happened with this guyAt the first sign of disinterest, block and delete. Sorry, he’s just not that into you. From an FDS standpoint, this guy had red flags from the start. He was love bombing you with the idea of getting you in bed and probably planned an elaborate date based on the fact that you were sexting with him; not a far reach to think you’d be DTF. Your phone chat where he was “bombarding” you with personal questions like an interview is right out of the way love bomber’s handbook. Then immediately after th… | /r/askFDS | 17/05/21 04:21 PM |
| 9 | Daily reminder that men don’t consider women’s backbreaking unpaid labour as real ‘work’This but also, that means the next generation will be populated only by kids born of women who are procreating with these sexist assholes.... I despair. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 04:19 PM |
| 1 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)It’s r/ femalelevelupstrategy it’s a sister sub to this one, you’ll find it linked in the fds sidebar/about section somewhere. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 04:06 PM |
| 1 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)I didn’t say she shouldn’t post it here, all I said was it would be great on r femalelevelupstrategy | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 04:05 PM |
| 2 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)It’s r/ femalelevelupstrategy it’s a sister sub to this one, you’ll find it linked in the fds sidebar/about section somewhere. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 04:04 PM |
| 1 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)It’s r/ femalelevelupstrategy it’s a sister sub to this one, you’ll find it linked in the fds sidebar/about section somewhere. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 04:04 PM |
| 3 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)It’s r/ femalelevelupstrategy it’s a sister sub to this one, you’ll find it linked in the fds sidebar/about section somewhere. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 04:03 PM |
| 30 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)Just a suggestion! It’s good stuff; the more reach the better. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 05:43 PM |
| 268 | In a Bad Situation and Can't Get out Because of Finances? Consider Bookkeeping (Don't Laugh)This would be a great post for the female level up subreddit. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 02:32 PM |
| 13 | 3 minutes and 30 seconds of women lying about penis size not mattering.I used to think size didn’t matter because the first few men I slept with had varying sizes and shapes in a normal penis size range. Then I had two men in a row with micropenises smaller than my thumb and it was the worssst. They were both amazing at giving head to try to make up for it, but it didn’t really. And after that I had men who were larger than I was used to, and it felt amazing and sex felt much more fulfilling than with my exes. So I vibe with the woman who says when she was younger … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 02:33 PM |
| 2 | No, you shouldn't do whatever you wantExactly. But she’s not the only young lady to fall down that path. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/21 01:49 AM |
| 3 | No, you shouldn't do whatever you wantIn her documentary miss Americana, she talks about how she struggled with an eating disorder during the red/1989 album and promotion to the point of passing out after shows due to pressure; so even if she wasn’t conforming to sexuality, she still fell prey to beauty standards. It’s a shame. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 02:12 PM |
| 13 | No, you shouldn't do whatever you wantGiven the subject matter in her music and her insistence on baggy clothes, I always had the sinking feeling that she had been sexually traumatized, and young. Lo and behold, her new song comes out along with her doing interviews saying it’s about her real experience as a young teenager being used by older men. (I believe she talked about her ex being 24 when she was 16.). But baggy clothes doesn’t stop the attention, so it looks like she’s gotten to the phase where she sees taking control of her… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 08:29 PM |
| 9 | All the proof we need that scrotes are lurking this sub 24/7 in massive proportions 😂Reddit ads are the worst. It’s like the people making the ads realize that most Reddit users are the absolute bottom denominator and don’t put any effort in beyond “hurdur look at this meme from 2 years ago, do you remember this??” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/05/21 07:45 PM |
| 35 | What exactly do MRAs think would happen if men started getting custody all the time?This reminds me of one time way back in ‘14 I was doing research on this kind of thing... in the MRA subreddit, a well meaning divorce attorney (who clearly did not understand MRA) did an AMA so that the men could understand their rights in divorce court, since apparently they were so pressed about it. Most of the responses were asking him or telling him that the courts were biased against men toward women, and he kept saying that from personal experience and statistics, it’s almost always men t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/05/21 02:18 PM |
| 9 | I need some advice on how HVM should be like regarding financial matters...It’s still the same though. You’d still be moving for this man who is saying he will leave you if you’re inconvenient to him. And how can you move to his country and be financially stable if you don’t already have a job there? He demands financial stability as a requirement for marriage, but you can’t be financially stable in that country unless you have income there. So how does that make sense?? Agree with all the other commenters that this raises a red flag. | /r/askFDS | 30/04/21 10:12 PM |
| 53 | The women in my life keep telling me sex is not a big deal and that I should just do it because I'm 23 F and a virgin. But I don't want to allow men to have easy access to my body. How do I explain that casual sex is not empowering to me?How can I properly explain to them that casual sex is not empowering and that it really only benefits men? Don’t worry about trying to explain this; people who aren’t open to hearing this will deride it. What the crux of your abstinence is your own bodily autonomy. Your right to do what you want with your own body, doesn’t matter what your motivations are. “My body, my choice.” People have the tendency to take opposing views as a personal attack, which is everyone hates fds so much. So don’t fee… | /r/askFDS | 30/04/21 07:18 PM |
| 1 | A reminder on the scope of this sub.I don’t see why they’d need to. It’s not new. It was announced and stickied when it was first created and now is listed as a sister sub in the sidebar. Besides that, occasional reminders like this one (which is pinned!) is appropriate. Edit: maybe there’d be value in adding it to the automod comment on every new post? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/04/21 07:12 AM |
| 7 | Is This One-Line Statement a Gaslight/ Non-apology?Yes, definitely a non-apology. You read that right. Even without the context (I only read down to the first paragraph) it’s a bad one. He’s sorry that you had something happen to you. No culpability in fostering that kind of work environment, no addressing what the actual experience was.... yeah, not a good one at all. | /r/askFDS | 27/04/21 02:22 PM |
| 6 | Gaming = Violence?My unsubstantiated reasoning for that thought is that there is a vast market for non-violent video games; also, there are a lot of games where you can choose to... not be violent. Knights of the old republic, for example, with the dark side and light side routes. Or WoW in the simple fact of factions. And yet its always the same type of guys who are addicted to games like modern warfare. I often think of my kid cousin who is the sweetest boy who just likes to build things; he collects legos and … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 03:07 AM |
| 19 | Is my fiances (25M) repeated anger justified?Is my fiances (25M) repeated anger justified? It’s not. You can feel it in your bones, can’t you? That’s why you’re reaching out here, to get your feelings affirmed from the outside. Well, I’m here to affirm your feelings: it is NOT right. The guy backed out at the last moment of his commitment about moving with me because he has new responsibilities here in our home country. He’s the one who supports his entire family as he’s the only son. He’s pretty stable with a booming business, house and h… | /r/askFDS | 26/04/21 11:13 PM |
| 10 | Gaming = Violence?I feel like there is a violence and video game correlation, but it’s not that video games make people violent; it’s that violent men like games that let them be violent. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/21 08:58 PM |
| 2 | Feeling stressed/hopeless about my unconventional relationship vision and seeking support and adviceSometimes I get the impression when asking around that men aren’t “wired” to provide for a child who isn’t biologically their offspring. Whether this has truth to it, I imagine that just like men are probably more likely to take a woman seriously if they’ve been investing in her, they might be similarly more likely to attach emotionally to a child they’ve been investing in. I agree with you there. Good men on their own are hard to find, and good men who match your specific vision for life are ev… | /r/askFDS | 26/04/21 05:37 PM |
| 7 | Feeling stressed/hopeless about my unconventional relationship vision and seeking support and adviceI feel you. I had the exact same opinion just a few years ago when I was your age. And I had conversations with a couple other women with the same opinion, so you’re not alone. There are men out there who also feel the same way; I’m not sure the number, but I know plenty of childfree , and my husband is one who early on and on his own score expressed a preference for adoption. It’s important to note though that the reason he prefers adoption is just based on his own experience as a kid, and he w… | /r/askFDS | 25/04/21 04:14 PM |
| 4 | Should I end a relationship over porn when he says he's quit?You are free to break up with him for any reason. If you can’t get over the porn thing and it hangs over your head, then you are in your rights to break up with him for it. Should you do it? That’s personal. I feel like it could just be a matter of time before he turns back to porn. He seems to respect his partners if his story about quitting for the length of time he was with his ex is true, but he still goes right back to it which means he doesn’t respect the full impact of what he heard from … | /r/askFDS | 25/04/21 03:51 PM |
| 7 | Trim public hair?Thought 1) 1 month is no time at all. You say in another comment that you were only seeing him 1 month before being official, which means two total months dating. That’s not enough time to show his consistency in HV actions and behaviors. Be wary of calling him HV— men are LV until they prove otherwise. Thought 2) It’s not bad for him to have a preference, but is very gauche to try to make your partner conform to them. Also, passive aggressive hinting is a red flag to me. That’s low low value. D… | /r/askFDS | 25/04/21 02:48 AM |
| 11 | Am I insecure or is he just... not itIf you have to ask, he is not it. Yes, this is weird. Someone who likes you would compliment you on your qualities; “I love you” is just empty fluff if it’s not backed by reasons or actions. Also, you’re just “talking”, and he’s saying he loves you? Red flag there. He may only be saying that to keep you on his hook, and complimenting other people/things more than you to neg you into lower self esteem, which is a classic LV play. | /r/askFDS | 25/04/21 12:01 AM |
| 3 | Am I being too sensitive?I’m worried about these lines: I have no self-esteem. I know it’s my fault for having anxiety I didn’t realize my anxiety affected him so much that he thinks I need therapy. I just feel so guilty and horrible for having these issues. Don’t feel guilty; none of this is your fault. But yes, I do think you help for your self esteem and anxiety issues, because they’re making you miserable, and for no other reason. I highly suggest you hit pause on dating until you are good with yourself first and fo… | /r/askFDS | 24/04/21 05:40 PM |
| 3 | Having male friends - Is this high value or not?Re: being high value— Don’t worry about projecting high value to impress your new beau. If you ever worry about being high value, know that is to increase your value to your own life; if this friend brings value to your life, then that’s good. Re: disclosing your trip/friendship to the guy you’re dating — your relationships past and present are frankly none of this guys business if you’re not an official item. If you are by the time of this trip, well let him know it’s a guy friend, but don’t di… | /r/askFDS | 24/04/21 06:56 AM |
| 11 | How to stop missing a LVMIt’s natural to miss the familiar and the good times. The good thing is you know he’s not good for you, so it’s just a matter of willpower now to keep him out of your life. Block him so you he can’t reach you. Delete him so you can’t reach him easily. If there’s something you want to say to him, try journaling or typing it out in a blank text pad... Vent, if you need to, which is better I think than just holding it in. But stow it away; ghost him now before you let him sneak under your guard aga… | /r/askFDS | 24/04/21 05:14 AM |
| 227 | He's 48, she's 19. They met when he was her tennis coach at 13 YEARS OLD. I'm disgusted and outraged for her and at him.Oh gross. She was on tennis team with his daughter... she was his daughter’s peer and friend! Like no wonder their family is disgusted by it. Ugh gross ahhh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/04/21 02:39 AM |
| 146 | This is a thing on IG/TikTok now. I hope she gets picked!I mean, I get the satisfaction of the end result after making something super clean and fresh, but I still only go through this effort when I’m moving house or getting paid for it. Last time I did this for someone else was as a teen my dad paid me to help him clean a rental property he managed after the prior tenant (a single father) moved out. There was a solid layer of scum over every counter and cobwebs in every corner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 07:18 PM |
| 8 | wage gap isn't realThanks. I was confused. Typically Nah Sis posts are serious posts or people discussing serious issues, so I wasn’t sure as to whether or not you were taking the tweet as literal or a joke. (Some early comments in the thread took it literally.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 04:00 PM |
| 81 | wage gap isn't realWhy nah sis as a tag? 100%, this is a joke, and a pretty funny one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 01:50 PM |
| 17 | Black women and weaponsOne comment I saw a lot at the height of Defund the Police hash tagging was men in the comments telling women that if there were no cops, would protect the scared little feminists from getting raped? Uh....... they already don’t stop us from getting raped, often don’t believe us about getting raped, or may actually be the ones that raped. And I fully recognize it’s even worse for black women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 07:53 PM |
| 22 | Scrote wants to divorce his wife that recently gave birth to their child because he's no longer in love and he's mad that they haven't had sex in FOUR months (she just have birth!). Now he's upset that his family and friends see him as selfish (not the fact that he's created a single parent home).No it’s worse than that... in the letter he says the baby was born 3 weeks ago, so less than a month. They haven’t had sex in. 4 months, which means he’d been sleeping with her up until 6 months into her pregnancy while he already knew he was only staying with her for respectability’s sake. A full year would be two months before she was pregnant, so he knew he didn’t love her and still had unprotected sex with her and got her pregnant. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 05:58 AM |
| 108 | HelpIn the wake of my last break up, I kept a notes document on my phone where I would type up anything I wanted to text my ex. It would be really cathartic to get it all out in text and hit the center in my brain that wanted to get all that out there, without the ability to accidentally hit send. It took some time, but I gradually found myself going there less and less as I found myself getting distracted by other things. Don’t forget to block your ex in your phone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/21 05:53 PM |
| 16 | If I [23] don't want to get married until I'm 30, how long should I wait for a proposal?Seconding your second point. Being flexible is definitely a good thing. If you meet the right HVM, he will be willing to work on your timeline. On the other hand, 7 years is a long time, and you might hit your milestones earlier than planned and be ready sooner than you think you will be. 7 years is also enough time to shift your goals, and there’s no shame in that. That said, I wouldn’t worry too much about dating for the time being; focus on your goals, and only date if you meet a man you find… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/21 06:44 PM |
| 6 | Great Men are Not Good PeopleThanks for the info. Thats disappointing to know. There’s probably a lot more men who think they’re high value for being against violence against women while still treating their partners like that than violent offenders. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/21 02:34 PM |
| 12 | Great Men are Not Good PeopleI sometimes think about how someone like Kurt Cobain stacks up. By all accounts I’ve seen, he was legitimately pro-women: raised money and awareness for women facing rape and mutilation in Africa, wrote protest songs about male on female violence, and spoke out against sexism , racism, and homophobia even in his own fanbase. I don’t know anything about his personal life so who knows how he was with women in his actual life, so for this thought exercise let’s just take all this at face value. But… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/21 03:25 AM |
| 169 | jfc, even the comments are a goldmine, so it’s wrong to have standards???Isn’t that the point of dating??? Job interviews for partnership? That’s what I was always taught dating should be. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/21 03:02 AM |
| 7 | ANOTHER SLUG UPDATE and honestly, this one is much worse. He was clearly exploiting her mental illnesses for his own personal amusement. One of the most disgusting, depraved, and truly evil things I've ever seen.Ooooh that makes a lot of sense. I hate this world. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/21 07:16 PM |
| 2 | Yes, you’re cheap. Good for this queen for turning down this low effort “date”!Yeah, well, this was back in tail end of 2014, so I wouldn’t say it’s just the norm because of the time period. (Edit- what I mean is there were still scrote a trying to bang without even dinner back in 2014, it’s not a new phenomena.) Also I think it definitely depends on the person, and also the people you’re attracting with your profile. My photos were primarily about activities, none of them were me at the gym, in a dress, or in a bathing suit... lots of matches but no one was responding to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/21 06:25 PM |
| 161 | ANOTHER SLUG UPDATE and honestly, this one is much worse. He was clearly exploiting her mental illnesses for his own personal amusement. One of the most disgusting, depraved, and truly evil things I've ever seen.And at the end he promises he never did it to “our” animals. No, just her exotic African land snail. Psychotic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:49 PM |
| 43 | Yes, you’re cheap. Good for this queen for turning down this low effort “date”!I was spoiled by the first man I went out with on Tinder. He was handsome, interesting, messaged me first and asked me to dinner, expressly seeking a unique dining experience (wanted to go to a gastropub in my town, then found somewhere else but comparable when he found out I’d already been there.) It didn’t work out between us, but damn did every single scrote I met online after that disappoint. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 06:47 PM |
| 63 | The famous "slug post" from the FDS podcast episode 5. Man makes girlfriend sick by grinding up slugs in her shakes. "aM i OvErReAcTiNg?”And the fact that he thought other people would be cool with it that he sent them pics of this awfulness??? Wtfff. Glad the friend told her, though I can’t imagine what person wouldn’t | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 03:45 PM |
| 34 | WHICH ONE OF YOU QUEENS DIVORCED THIS LVM LMAOLove the horror movie sound effects tho. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 01:11 AM |
| 27 | Tell me about the time you were the “dream girl”I feel like men who do those kind of thoughtful things for their dream girl but not everyone they date or care about... are not it, man. My husband is great. He foots the bills on outings, buys random thoughtful gifts just because something reminded him of someone, makes time... not just for me, but also for his sister, his parents, his best friends, and even his kind-of-good friends. I knew I was the one for him because he quit self-medicating his trauma with alcohol because of me, quit smoking… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/21 09:09 PM |
| 27 | A toast to dangerous women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them.Maybe “gutsier”? More gutsy. It’s kind of ironic to drop the word ballsy in a sentence about womanhood. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/21 08:06 AM |
| 4 | Ladies how do you handle bills in marriage/long term relationships?Currently married. Based on common property laws in our state, we jointly pool 50% of each of our paychecks into one account where we set bills to autopay from, and the account remainder accumulates as emergency savings, family spending, and and future renovation spending. Most of our furniture purchases come out of that, except for anything he specifically wants or specifically wants to gift to me. (So for example we paid for the couch out of the house funds because we needed one, but he paid f… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/21 07:59 PM |
| 37 | I had to delete my Reddit account because my ex LVM was stalking it.Congrats on getting away from the ex, but um... “And yes, I got myself a HVM now!” If you broke up with your ex on January 1st, it has now been about 90 days, or about 3 months, since you would have been available to start seeing other men. Be careful about labeling this new man an HVM in your mind after so short a time, because that will start to make it hard to see his behavior objectively if anything suspicious starts happening. It’s still the period of time in your relationship when a man is… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 07:49 PM |
| 5 | Using movies to screen?I don’t think Captain Marvel is the best litmus test. Captain Marvel is very average and I watched it at a point in my life where I was absolutely over superhero movies. Also, Marvel completely mishandled her character I n a bid for “girl power” and it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. If a man has the same opinion, I would trust him more than a man who says he likes the movie because Strong Women Leads. It all comes down to the reasoning for me. Being completely adverse to watching it whatsoev… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/21 04:50 PM |
| 2 | I saw this and thought, what if this is what people watched for recreation? Instead of mindless fucking - it was about meaningful relationships that led to natural intimacy (and the physical intimacy didn't need to be shown on the screen because it was a by-product, not the purpose)I honestly don’t think most young boys necessarily want the porn theyre being delivered. If you’re exposed to porn before you’re even in the double digits, well first of all I’m pretty sure someone committed a crime but most importantly a lot of kids aren’t fully aware of what’s going because they don’t have experience to contextualize any of it. All they know is that adults are crazy about this kind of thing apparently, and it makes them feel some sort of way. Then we get to teenagers and the a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/21 04:43 PM |
| 3 | I can’t and won’t accept that 32% of women who run experience breast ligament pain and possible permanent injury.I used to marathon run and was a 28 FFF; my sports bra was Enell, which is sold on Amazon. The smallest size fits a 28/30 waist with a C cup or larger. Always felt super secure to me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/21 09:09 AM |
| 5 | Potentially OT; has anyone else had an influx of trolls in their inbox?Turned off my messages and dms a long time ago. I used to just delete them without opening them, but then i realized i was still spending 20 seconds longer than I needed to on these, so just turned it all off. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/03/21 02:27 PM |
| 1 | YouTube comment about Netflix’s To All The Boys 2 (but really applies to pretty much all movies)I am going to disclaim that I come at this commentary this from a literature major’s perspective, where just because I am arguing a specific perspective doesn’t mean that the your point is invalid, and just because I’m criticizing LVM behavior does not mean that I think To All the Boys is trash and purely bad messaging to young impressionable teens. (Edited to add: I’m really glad to see that in the end she does end up going off to college single and focusing on herself! I didn’t know that (have… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 11:24 PM |
| 3 | YouTube comment about Netflix’s To All The Boys 2 (but really applies to pretty much all movies)Spoilers, if you haven’t seen it: In to all the boys 2, it’s Peter routinely stands her up, has an inappropriate relationship with his ex that he doesn’t talk to her about, for Valentine’s, he gives her an Edgar Allen Poe poem and lets her believe he wrote it (copying a poem isn’t the worst thing, especially as a teen, but the way it was delivered was low value and he lies to her about being the writer, low value.) He makes her feel insecure by gaslighting her about his relationship with Jen whi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 04:35 PM |
| 19 | YouTube comment about Netflix’s To All The Boys 2 (but really applies to pretty much all movies)I haven’t read any of the books, but I read a list about the differences between first book and movie and from what I understand, the movie actually removes some more harmful things... like in the book the little sister sends out the letters because she wants to hurt Lara Jean because she also has a crush on the best friend, for example, which is just a lot of pickme nonsense. In the movie she just wants her sister to find love. So maybe if the same director of the first movie had adapted the se… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 02:28 AM |
| 165 | YouTube comment about Netflix’s To All The Boys 2 (but really applies to pretty much all movies)What’s frustrating about to all the boys 2 is that in the first movie, the main love interest really is a sweet guy who tries hard to show he cares with a few teenage missteps that he learns from, but in the second movie suddenly transforms into a typical LVM in order to make her secondary love interest look like actual competition... and it backfired because John Ambrose is literally portrayed as the perfect man compared, and she only stays with Peter because he’s her first boyfriend. Peter doe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/03/21 05:39 PM |
| 90 | Another truth bomb from this guy!I like this guy! I looked him up after this, and his persona is just so wholesome. For those who didn’t look him up, basically his whole brand is: husband first, father second, and enjoying life third. His whole tiktok feed is positivity about being a good partner and parent (and also transforming your life for the better, which is his day job.) So refreshing after seeing all the other toxic couples on YouTube and tiktok whose brands are built on crassness and mean pranks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/02/21 03:54 AM |
| 3 | This is what dating a scrote looks like. Pass.On the flip side, I once posted on r relationships regarding something about a male friend did while drunk (for the record, it was neither sexual or violent) and then I was accused by redditors of cheating on my boyfriend for even having male friends. Double standard. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/02/21 04:43 PM |
| 378 | It’s heartbreaking to see young women/teenage girls being preyed on like this.“This is gonna happen whether I like it or not” Omg no girl. Someone who loves you would not make your feel like that. I hope that’s the advice she’s getting out there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/21 07:50 PM |
| 36 | Movie Review: My Big Fat Greek Wedding (extremely mild spoilers of a 19 yr old movie, I guess...?)I like your review. I feel like you give a fair critique about the problematic aspects while praising the good parts; sometimes I feel like people can get in arms about these things, like if you can’t criticize the characters for not being fds while still enjoying the other positive aspects of it. Thanks for reminding me of this movie. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/21 02:17 AM |
| 57 | Our fav guy just dropped another gem 😂Found his tik tok page: https://www.tiktok.com/@girnar21?lang=en | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/21 06:47 AM |
| 73 | NoT aLL MeNI always see the counter that the majority of male homicide victims are killed by men too, it’s not specifically women that are killed more often by men! Which is a shit argument because that just proves that men are the majority of murderers, which doesn’t really help the case as much as they think. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/21 06:35 AM |
| 8 | I want to share an eye opening conversation i had with a guy friendTheon’s treatment at the hands of Ramsey is apparently not as traumatizing as the Outlander story, from what I can tell (having not actually seen outlander, just having it described to me). Nobody I know quit watching GOT after Theon (and like 90% of people in my social circles watched it), but I personally know like five people who quit outlander over it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/21 07:14 AM |
| 138 | Another post that demonstrates why it’s good to weary of so-called male ‘friends’. It always come back to sex and whether they see you as bangable or not.Not gonna lie, when I was between relationships, it was definitely a fantasy of mine to have a threesome with two partners focusing on me. But it was hard enough to find even 1, and the kind of men who want threesomes want to bond with another man over degrading the same woman, or to have two women fighting over him. So needless to say it was a fantasy I never brought to life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/21 05:15 PM |
| 315 | I want to share an eye opening conversation i had with a guy friendI assume this was Outlander; I’ve never seen it, but I knew quite a few people who watched it until that episode and just quit watching because they couldn’t stomach it. I can see the very thin logic that the male torture scene was explicitly intended to be upsetting where as the the porn scenes are explicitly intended to be arousing, but like... thats the barest veneer of even attempting to engage in critical thinking. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/21 04:46 PM |
| 7 | How to handle mutual acquaintances asking about LVM in school/professional environment?You’re overthinking it. If you feel uncomfortable being as straight forward as saying “We’re not friends anymore because he’s sucky person,” just be vague and say, “We don’t really talk anymore.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/02/21 02:44 AM |
| 6 | Cell Phone Tango part 6!I haven’t used Snapchat regularly for over 5 years, but I remember that being a thing with seeing peoples best friends. So maybe that was just a really long tome ago. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/21 04:31 PM |
| 1 | She is right, society pushes us to give “nice guys” a chance even if we are not attracted to themThanks for sharing! The article is pretty fascinating to see that tribe recognizes that sometimes there might be someone better, and since it’s the men doing the peacocking, they have to be on their a-game since someone can just swoop in and woo their lover with no social consequences. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/21 07:35 AM |
| 211 | She is right, society pushes us to give “nice guys” a chance even if we are not attracted to themThey say give guys you’re not attracted to a chance, but when they find out someone settled for them, they get pissy about it. Catch-22 🤷🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/21 06:04 PM |
| 3 | Financial Red flags and the GME MeltdownSee, that's fine. That's great. I highly doubt his Mom put like, 10k into this present. Right? Me, I wanted to take part for funsies, but no way in hell was I buying it at 300 to try to make a quick buck. I waited till it swung back under 100, did not spend more than my entertainment budget for a couple weeks (it's not like I'm going out anywhere to spend it, anyway), and basically wrote it off as a purchase. Watching WSB, there were plenty of wsb veterans who set aside a budget for making their… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/21 12:59 AM |
| 32 | Financial Red flags and the GME MeltdownThe GME craze is so stupid. Like the regular wsb users (I assume) were likely more realistic with their expectations. but the bandwagonners buying in with their life savings at 300 are so stupid as to make me question their iq. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/21 02:44 AM |
| 4 | If your man respects you, he won’t let you into a dirty and untidy home.No, Sorry my comment was a little unclear. The Roommate did not approve of the dynamic of women cleaning up after guys who won’t take care of themselves. In the incident I’m referring to, I came over while my boyfriend was sick and made him soup. I ended up cleaning in the kitchen because the stove was too filthy to cook on. When the roommate came home and saw that, he told me to stop and go spend time with my boyfriend. He also that I shouldn’t be cleaning up, because that was just going to set… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/21 01:56 AM |
| 143 | “When friends talk to me about their men”Turning into a zombie? No problem let’s go to the morgue! Meanwhile, men in real life are leaving their wives with cancer and post-partum left and right. An LVM could never. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/21 07:05 AM |
| 132 | If your man respects you, he won’t let you into a dirty and untidy home.Reminds me of my 1st year college bf’s roommate. Lovely guy, adorable relationship with his gf and was friendly with my and the bf, but I didn’t interact with him too much. A couple times though, he told me things along those lines... like, early on he saw me doing dishes at their apartment and said not to be one of those gfs that came to clean. In retrospect I really should have listened to that advice instead of learning it from my own trial and error. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/21 06:54 AM |
| 1 | Don't forget to head over to r/askFDS and help a fellow FDS lady today!Thanks! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/21 04:27 PM |
| 2 | Don't forget to head over to r/askFDS and help a fellow FDS lady today!Ooh, I like this flair idea. I used to be pretty active in ask fds, already an approved commenter there. I’ll pop by.... but can I get a flair? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/21 04:15 PM |
| 165 | Women Are Honestly Not That ComplicatedMy husband came into my office (aka the bedroom where my computer station is; his office is the nook between the kitchen and the living room), to get me to take a break, lead me by the hand out to the balcony so we could experience the first rain of the year together. Knowing that rainy days are one of my favorite things. It’s really not that hard to put effort into daily life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/21 01:27 AM |
| 136 | Being decent isn’t difficultI haven’t heard it said about rape, but have heard it about groping, unwanted advances (kissing, being pushy about sex), asking for nudes, sharing those nudes, leering at women, and talking about women’s bodies. Depending on severity, some of the above can fall under or lead to “sexual assault”. Especially when things like pushing for sex when a woman doesn’t want it is now considered sexual assault, when it didn’t used to be... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/21 07:50 PM |
| 28 | I had a man say "enjoy your servitude" when I told him about my job that pays me more than his.Nah, one thing we need to accept that LVM are pervasive in society, and no “category” is safe. You might be able to find a diamond in the rough, but don’t count on it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/21 07:45 PM |
| 9 | Why We Support Investment: The Fallacy of Focusing on Financial InvestmentIt’s not even that you have to “get” men to spend money on you... if you have to “get”, rather than him already offering to pay and invest his time/effort, then he’s LVM and not that into you. Men will bend over backward for a person whose interest they value. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/02/21 07:20 AM |
| 11 | Dont politely laugh for a man, if he's not funnyI love a good corny joke. Most of the time, I am laughing at a corny joke because of the affection I have for the joke-teller, sure, but it still makes me laugh genuinely. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/21 05:32 PM |
| 119 | LVM wanting other men to participate in their LVM behavior. Disgusting.These men act like natural attraction and cheating are the exact same thing. It's one thing to find someone attractive; that's just nature. But uh... Treat that person normally and don't feed that attraction by scouring the internet for pictures, actively lusting over, and pursuing that person... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/21 05:22 PM |
| 24 | What do you say to sexist remarks?If it’s one on one I generally blank on them, because there’s no use in calling a sexist a sexist. If it’s in a group, I’d respond as if they were being completely serious. Like “make me a sandwich.” “No thanks, I’m not your mom”... actually, I haven’t gotten the nerve to say the last part, but have genuinely straight faced tell a man “no” before to that request, and it got a reaction from the other men in the vicinity as if I’d delivered a sick burn. Idk, I feel like they were performatively on… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/01/21 11:50 PM |
| 156 | Men's friendships aren't 'stronger' or 'deeper' than women's friendships.My sister’s ex was an NVM. A little while later she reconnected with one of the couples they’d been mutual friends with, and at that point she’d felt comfortable enough to tell them about what NVM was like. The guy of the couple kept saying that if he’d known what a jerk NVM-Ex was, they’d have sided with my sister completely. But lo and behold, just a couple months ago I hear that NVM-Ex is still hanging around and the Guy friend keeps complaining about how he pisses him off, but “NVM-Ex has be… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/01/21 08:03 PM |
| 8 | Miley Cyrus recently talked about her feelings on being in a relationship with both genders, and why she prefers women. I thought it was an interesting take! Also notice she mentions something about “paying for everything” 👀I think it’s also partly that she is so famous that her star has eclipsed all her partners’, and that it’s easier to be a woman who is more dominant in that sense than a man. I’m sure Liam Hemsworth was not pleased that he was eclipsed by his brother AND his Miley, to huge degrees. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/21 05:14 PM |
| 93 | Male gaze vs female gaze in cinema... chef’s kiss 😚 👌🏻Yes! I’ve never thought about it this way before, but I read a lot of romance written by women and it’s all about paying attention to the little ticks that reveal something about how the man feels. Darcy flexing his hand like he can feel the ghost of Lizzie’s touch. Eye gazing, light touches on the shoulder that aren’t even sexual. There’s this one scene in the Lizzie Bennet Diaries YouTube adaptation where Lizzie steadies herself by putting a hand on Darcy’s shoulder just for a moment, and Darc… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/21 05:00 PM |
| 3 | Glad to know there are more women who are not afraid to speak up against kinky culture and its roots 👏👏👏👏👏👏But the implication of the joke is that it’s not consensual, so yeah, that’s pretty rapey. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/21 04:47 PM |
| 6 | The way some scrotes think women are successful...Yes. Bc in porn the male stars often finish on their scene partner. Two main places are: face (aka “facial”), neck / chest area (“pearl necklace”). And to remove any ambiguity, scrote op used hashtag #kneesandback to reference to sex positions. The fact that I know these terms is really annoying. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/21 04:20 PM |
| 14 | The way some scrotes think women are successful...Also tag pornsick would work,because it’s a piece of jewelry not a secret symbol for jizz JFC | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/21 04:03 PM |
| 7 | Men are proposing on walks in the woodsI personally like the classic “fancy dinner and proposal for dessert” type of proposal... not so flashy and big that it draws a ton of attention, or that brings too many other people into the mix... but also something that shows effort. Rampant pandemic probably ruined that type of proposal though.... that said, an effort needs to get made... Like, a normal walk in the woods is very low effort. If you’re outdoorsy, why not go for walk or a hike to a beautiful or sentimental view? That’s what my … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/21 08:23 PM |
| 13 | Im still in highschool, but I wish I could restart and live it differently myself. I watch anime and I don't have pedophilic tendencies. Stop excuses scrotes (the reply )What’s really frustrating to me is that there are fun, non sexual, arthouse and or/just plain chill anime out there still being produced of every genre (from innocent teen age rom com, to straight up silly detective shows) and normal aimed at a reasonable demographic. But the ones that are popular and get well advertised and popular (especially overseas from Japan, but also locally as well ) are the ones with the fan service aimed at the degenerate older male demographic, because they will spend… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/21 07:13 AM |
| 71 | Beware of Loser Gold-Digging MenI am frequently bowled over by how much these men hate women and yet still want to bother with them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/01/21 06:07 PM |
| 11 | This should be a thing all celebrities say/clarify tbh.Online culture is so weird tho that publically thirsting after celebrities is so normalized, I feel like even if he is anti inappropriate content at all, to say “no sexualizing me at all” would backfire... I’ve actually seen flavors of this happen where celebrities (male or female) or even just fairly well known you tubers express being uncomfortable with the level of fan behavior like shopping, fan art, thirst tweets, etc... and it gets backlash... so under 18 is a line he can draw and saying h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/01/21 07:03 AM |
| 6 | From Men’s Mouths to Your Ears. Don’t be a forever girlfriend.The masters thing? Just timeline wise, that would have added another two years before I would have considered marrying him. He’s not against me getting my masters if I do decide to go for it, but he wanted to get married to me sooner than five years down the line... Edit, or did you mean why did I tell him that? The answer to that is that I still had pick me culture ingrained in me, and based on media and everyone I knew around me dating, five to seven years seemed reasonable to me then. He was … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/01/21 05:43 AM |
| 31 | From Men’s Mouths to Your Ears. Don’t be a forever girlfriend.Lol this was me actually. At 25 I told my now husband, then boyfriend of one year that I wanted work my way into a career job, then live by myself for a year then live together for a year, then be engaged for a year and then have our wedding. Maybe even get my masters first. It really threw him off kilter, because I told him that as he feeling out how I felt about marriage and was planning on when/how to propose to me... I legit clearly had avoidance issues. (He did wait for me to come to my sen… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/01/21 08:56 PM |
| 9 | Question: Sexist friendHow else was that supposed to be interepreted? “No!! I didn’t mean to insinuate that women are too small brained to learn things on their own, I meant that this specific woman is too small brained to learn things on her own. See it’s not sexist because it’s not a broad statement!” And! Even if she learned about the stock market from her boyfriend, it’s still legitimate knowledge?? It’s not like she magically absorbed the knowledge through this guys penis... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/01/21 08:38 PM |
| 72 | I almost believed a man over a woman; thank god for FDSGlad you dodged a bullet! This is a reminder why it’s important to share this information! You don’t know who you could be saving by calling out bad men. I considered immediately blocking him as FDS usually suggests but I called him and told him what i had put together and how I couldn’t continue seeing him. Luckily it seems like it’ll be an easy break, I chose to tell him rather than ghost him because I thought this would upset him the least this way. You know this guy is a manipulative abusive… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/01/21 06:38 AM |
| 199 | Co-worker Propositioned Me For Sex, Hand Me a Barf Bagwhen they mistake your “niceness” for interest I think there was no mistake... highly doubt that the niceness was mistaken for interest. More like, “she breathes so I might as well shoot my shot. I’m not going to see her again so I don’t have to deal with the consequences” whether or not you were interested | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 11:42 PM |
| 60 | This made me laugh. A man sells his "do nothing" services and people pat him on the back for it. He says, "When someone is trying to do something, I think the best thing to do is to help lower the bar for them." I don't think a woman would receive the same accolades for this. What do you think?I don’t feel like the translation “do nothing” really accurately describes what he’s doing... reading the article, it sounds like what he’s selling is literally just being moral support or a plus one. Some examples given are a client who doesn’t find any motivation to go for a walk unless they have someone with them, so he shows up and they go for a walk. Or if you need 4 people for a reservation but only have 3, for example. It’s likely a cultural thing... cultures like Japan where community is… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 08:24 PM |
| 9 | Height Correlation Survey- Do tall men infantilize shorter women?I’m 5’0”, and I’ve literally never met a man shorter than me. I’ve dated around with men just a little taller than me to over 6 feet, though my only LTR was with my college boyfriend (4” height diff) and current husband (13” height diff). IMO there is not much that can be discerned from height difference. LVM come in many forms. I will say that the people who mentioned my height the most were probably like 5’7”-5’8”.... too tall to be “short”, but tall enough to like, rest an elbow on my shoulde… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/01/21 10:34 AM |
| 43 | What’s the worst neg you got?Man on ok Cupid with a 30% match score messages me: “We probably wouldn’t get along. We don’t have much in common.” Me: “... so why are you’re messaging me?” “You’re cute, wanted to give you a chance to prove me wrong.” Edit: that wasn’t really a neg , but it had the same intent. Here’s an actual neg: “You’re actually pretty interesting!” I was chuffed because I am hella interesting. :// | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/21 10:08 PM |
| 5 | Creepy male teachersLooking back, I’m feeling pretty lucky that my school district always had a really high standard for teachers, and especially in all the advance classes I was in. I wonder if LVM teachers also gravitate towards teaching less rigourous classes.... like our jr high woodshop teacher was gossiped about a lot as being creepy as was one of the gym teachers in tenth grade... but the only male teachers I had were my AP history teachers who were mostly just intense about preparing us for the tests | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/01/21 10:00 PM |
| 4 | Guy on first date tells me he won't be paying for me moving forwardFair. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/01/21 05:17 PM |
| 64 | Guy on first date tells me he won't be paying for me moving forwardI actually am not sure if that’s a red flag for me. Here’s the thing: it’s currently the accepted norm to split the bill, and there is the possibility that a man who wants to pay does not want to offend a woman who says that she wants to split. I’ve dated a couple of men who would tell me he’s got it this time, and I can the next date. But the next date, he’d say the same thing and pay for the date again, until three or four dates have gone by and I hadn’t paid for a thing. They just kept tellin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/01/21 03:34 AM |
| 72 | HVM texting habits?Too much is if they are ALWAYS replying immediately and badgering you for a response. Too little is if he goes for a full 24 hours or more without responding to anything and then picking up the conversation as if he never blanked you. Happy medium is occasionally throughout the day and every once in a while a full on conversation by text if you both happen to be free for a few minutes. I strongly prefer one or two texts in a drawn out conversation throughout the day and maybe a phone call or tex… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/01/21 11:19 PM |
| 13 | Sure, see how he treats his mom... But also see how (or IF!) he stands up to herNot really the same situation, but it reminded me of my own partner so I wanted to share... My husband’s mom is a horrendous person. Literally abused him as a child by locking him in his room for weeks at a time and feeding him through a doggy door as a grounding. He was eventually sent away to live with his dad and much more loving step mom, but as an adult he attempted to build a relationship with her through occasional calls and visits. (I really wished he wouldn’t, because even though he was… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/01/21 08:29 PM |
| 2 | Do you mostly date men who you are viscerally and immediately sexually attracted to on a gut level or do you date a wide range of men and “give guys a chance”?I would say neither, though closer to the “cast a wide net” type... In my dating and even casual hookup history, I’m generally friendly with someone for months or even years before seeing them as a potential partner. (Examples, my husband was a classmate I recognized as good looking, but I wasn’t interested in dating until I interacted with him for a few class projects over a couple months. A previous flame ran in the same social circles as me for years in college, but we didn’t get together unt… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/21 07:16 PM |
| 4 | In other news, at least 64% of women are delusional pickmes.I think the “ever” in the question skews the answers to yes, because it does happen every once in a while, regardless of whether or not the responder approves of it. Are they good relationships? Probably not; I feel like the whole point of long term hookups is to pass the time until someone you want to date comes along, (I’m not a proponent of this now, but in my early 20s this is how I and many of my friends and casual hookup partners saw hookups).... so converting the hookup to a relationship … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/21 06:51 PM |
| 2 | Real life Beth Harmon! Of course, there was misogyny in the comments, but she called them all out. I love seeing women doing what they love - Give her a follow if you canI love the show. The show is phenomenal and everyone should watch it. We agree on that. She's a chess prodigy, of course she's young, I don't misunderstand that as their intention on emphasizing her age. I think it's a great show that everyone should watch but could also have better feminism (sometimes they film Ana Joy's body sexily when there's no need to, see other posts on this sub about her sexy mental breakdown) and the men kind of suck. That's all I'm saying. I'm not trying to continue an… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/20 07:50 PM |
| 10 | Real life Beth Harmon! Of course, there was misogyny in the comments, but she called them all out. I love seeing women doing what they love - Give her a follow if you canI don't judge her for what she does with men, I'm judging all these men for going after a teenage girl. They make constant reference to her not even being 21 by the end of the series, but all her love interests were grown adult men when she meets them in her first tournament at 15. And yes, she's messed up with no guidance about men, but the show doesn't frame the age and experience gap as an issue; in fact, it goes out of it's way to say that her trauma causes her to push away these men who are… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/20 05:51 PM |
| 96 | Real life Beth Harmon! Of course, there was misogyny in the comments, but she called them all out. I love seeing women doing what they love - Give her a follow if you canI loved the show but it’s also problematic. Like, the main character is a great multi dimensional, the acting, directing, sets and fashion are phenomenal. and the show actively avoids a lot of stereotypical trauma tropes with her sordid past (There’s no physical child abuse or rape.) But the character is very much framed for the male gaze and all her love interests are grown men when she’s less than 20 for a majority of the show. Not an FDS show at all. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/20 07:17 AM |
| 17 | Thanks FDS... for letting me see relationships in another level. Can't even watch TV without easily being able to label HVM and LVM aka boys.I still enjoy shows while critiquing the hell out of the relationships and characters. I like to call most shows LVM propaganda. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 05:41 AM |
| 10 | Vanilla Convert (anti BDSM finally!)Thank you for sharing! I’m really happy for you. Here’s to hoping he stays the hv partner you deserve | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/20 02:10 AM |
| 1 | The "censorship" defense is already starting.Lol that’s not censorship... these companies have the right to have contracts with whoever they want however they want them. That’s just capitalism. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/20 11:43 PM |
| 21 | I never knew we had to start debunking the "not all women have been molested theory....pickmes really be putting hurdles in our ability to bring feminist issues out in the frontI’m lucky enough to have never been straight up raped or sexually assaulted, but I have had my physical boundaries trampled by men plenty of times. I’ve been followed around downtown streets and ducked into stores to avoid them. I’ve had men who i straight up told I do NOT want them touching me sneak in to lay a hand on my arm or my knee. I might not have had my breasts or ass groped, but I think these men who touched me absolutely would have gone farther if they could’ve. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/20 07:50 AM |
| 45 | This is another level of depravity...He needs therapy too jfc | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/20 07:44 AM |
| 30 | This is sad. And nearly every single comment says “as long as I’m in his presence 😌”I agree. There needs to be a balance though even for a married couple. Some nights you do your own thing next to each other like in this video, other nights spend time doing things together. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 11:11 PM |
| 3 | Why do friendship breakups hurt more than relationship breakups? :(I feel you. My high school best friend distanced herself from me over ten years ago and I still think about it from time to time and avoid places where I might run into her (I joined a social club my coworker recommended, turns out ex-bestie is a member... it was extremely awkward.) Opposed to that, I feel much more comfortable reflecting on my time with my ex from a few years back, and I’m not upset about it anymore. That said, you’re better off without your friend... seems like she was not tha… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 07:21 PM |
| 7 | R/LadyBoners has NO taste 🤢 what’s with the crusty old white men??Co-signed! FDS is about standards, not taste! Colin Firth, from what I understand, has a decades long reputation for being a class act and still has a great head of hair and jawline. For women in his age range, it is absolutely appropriate to be into him. I’ve never heard of Khalil Ramos. That’s probably more likely why firth got more upvotes than Khalil. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 06:08 PM |
| 33 | I got you, babe.Just to clarify, you think that the owner had an idea that something happened with the director? It wouldn’t surprise me if he did. Creep guys are creepy and even if management knows, they probably don’t want a stain on their reputation for hiring creeps. I have a friend whose boss was promoted, then instead of promoting her to the position, transferred another executive into that role despite not being qualified. This second executive had a missing staircase reputation; all the women in the com… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/20 08:22 AM |
| 92 | If a man tells you that you can do better - BELIEVE HIM.I remember my ex would say things like, "I can't believe I didn't have to fight other guys for you." And it's like... yeah? Because I'm a good partner who doesn't go around giving other men the idea that they have a chance with me when I have a boyfriend? He turned out pretty self-effacing and porn addicted to the point where he would reject me for sex and then jerk off to porn later after I went to bed, then tell me he hated himself for it. So. That was that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/20 07:14 PM |
| 1 | The "phone thing"I’ve got the best of both worlds. My husband thinks “I Trust West-Cook, so I have no problem with her having access to my phone and accounts” AND “I trust West-Cook, so I don’t need to mess around with her phone and accounts.” I know all his passwords and have my finger print saved on his phone. He has none of mine. If he needs my phone, like say I ask him to check my texts while I’m driving, he’ll ask for the code but has never made it a point to memorize it. I honestly think the above is the m… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/20 06:52 PM |
| 113 | If you haven't already heard of this, I thought you might be interested. "She is not your rehab."From their about page: Matt co-founded She Is Not Your Rehab with his wife Sarah and launched the concept in his 2019 TEDx talk. He says the movement is simply an invitation for men to acknowledge their own childhood trauma and to take responsibility for their healing so that they can transform their pain instead of transmitting it on those around them. This is lovely. I wish them the best of luck. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/20 06:41 PM |
| 12 | How to juggle menOne is that I feel like I don’t know what to say when a guy I’m seeing asks “what are you up to” and I’m on a date with another man. I don’t want to make up a whole lie but I also don’t really want it to to be something brought up that I’m out with someone else. I wouldn’t answer calls or texts when out on a date unless it’s an emergency. After the raft I’d just say, oh I was at dinner... not a lie. Any other details are none of his business. Problem two is I have this guy saying he’s just seein… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/20 04:56 AM |
| 44 | Pickmeisha on r/offmychestSo like, I personally do think it’s not cool to “shame” people for things they can’t change, like penis size, height, or balding. But also, (1) having a preference for partners who are tall and have a big Dick and hair is not the same as shaming. And (2) it’s men having a complex about their penis size/height/balding while being judgmental about women’s looks that is shameful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 04:43 PM |
| 6 | THE AUDACITY: found this “ring” my ex gifted me while cleaning out my house today. Made sure to put it in the long-term storage it deserves: the garbage can!3D doodling pen sounds pretty dope and it’d be fun to get this if it was just like, a one off thing where he was testing it out and the first thing he did with this weird contraption was attempt to make something for me. But if it was an actual present he put in a box for a gift? Or he’d never given me actual jewelry? That’s messed up | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/20 05:48 PM |
| 18 | I’ve had this conversation way too many times 🚩Very popular podcaster. His podcast is always on top lists. Likes to pose as intelligent and as someone who doesn’t use his platform to preach or push an agenda... so he frequently has on controversial guests and let’s them talk. I’ve never actually listened to him tho but that’s my understanding based on what I’ve heard from people who have. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/20 01:07 AM |
| 61 | Bisexuals: Don't share your orientation with your man. No good comes of it.I think as a general rule of thumb, not telling men about your sexual past (same sex or otherwise) is more of a measure to protect yourself against LVM behavior than to screen in HVM. If your identity as Bi is part of your daily life, than it makes sense that it’s a visible part of you. For me, my bi-ness is just something I don’t talk about. Not that I’m in the closet; it’s just not something I discuss anymore. I just think it’s easier to act as a straight ally, because I personally don’t have … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/20 02:16 AM |
| 3 | Human decency? Don’t know her.It's funny because he thinks he's destroyed a hot girl's confidence when all it's done is make him look like a buffoon. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 09:37 PM |
| 11 | Girl wants to send her boyfriend nudes but feels self conscious, predictable replies ensue“None of the 7.6 billion people in the world should ever send nudes, got it” ... yes, ideally, they shouldn’t. But people gonna do what they want, no skin off your nose so why are you so pressed by this person pointing out that revenge porn is something that can happen. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 07:52 PM |
| 22 | THIS is why we don’t date men who insist on going dutch!! He’s the gold digger!!!FYI, it’s spelt “spiel.” Glad to hear this jerk is an ex! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/11/20 09:26 PM |
| 1 | Porn has fried so many brains they can’t even see a cute picture puppy video without mentioning porn.Yeah some guy dm’d me a few paragraphs that I didn’t read but I did notice somewhere in the middle there was all caps “IT’S JUST A JOKE.” Yeah, well, your joke is a knee jerk reaction that references step sibling porn. (You know it’s a knee jerk reaction because not one of the dozens of posters even waited a moment to read the comments to see if anyone had already made their highlarious joke.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 02:10 AM |
| 193 | Porn has fried so many brains they can’t even see a cute picture puppy video without mentioning porn.Not sure if this content fits here, but I thought I was going crazy reading the comments and needed to talk to this about someone. The rot has really set in. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/20 04:13 PM |
| 2 | Manipulating/guilting someone into taking you back isn't romantic.This was posted to this sub not even 47 hours ago. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/10/20 09:19 PM |
| 364 | Romcoms may have tried to twist our perception of healthy relationships but this lady schools all nice guys into thinking otherwise.I decided to google to see what was up with this and this was the first article I saw: https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/eeab1f33-ef33-42fa-9122-4f86d1c09430 This happened in 2017. He hardly lasted 48 hours, stopping only after someone punched him at 4 in the morning because they were sick of him playing all night. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 06:30 AM |
| 9 | We should be wooed and we’re not made to woo-ShakespeareNot just younger... she says that she consistently goes after men who are in the 20-24 age group even though she’s nearing 40, with the excuse that men in this age group are easier to “train”. And that she would date younger if she could (citing 17 years old being the age of consent in NY.) This is the same predatory line of thought that predatory men say about young virgin girls. Personally I don’t really see how giving women a pass on being predatory towards minors and people barely out of the… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 10:48 AM |
| 6 | 56 y.o. Liam Cunningham refused to let GoT team make Davos crush on Missandei, played by 28 y.o. Nathalie EmmanuelI see. Well, two points I’d make the. Is 1) the show went off the rails when they went off book, they hardly consulted with the author after they embarked on their own, so what the show runners did/tried to do cannot be held up as an intention of what is to come in the books, especially for smaller storylines and details that they made up all the time. And 2) they probably won’t meet in the books since the books probably won’t ever be finished, at the rate they’re getting published. So there’s h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 11:14 PM |
| 15 | 56 y.o. Liam Cunningham refused to let GoT team make Davos crush on Missandei, played by 28 y.o. Nathalie EmmanuelThey haven’t met in the books, still on different ends of the world. Plus, missendei’s character in the book is a little girl; she was aged up in the show for another woman to show having sex. From what I recall, book Davos is devoted to his king and his wife only, and thinks often of how when he’s done serving his king in his war he’ll be able to go home to his wife and family. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 09:01 PM |
| 5 | Who else wishes "men age like wine" was actually true? I hear about these sexy older men (mostly from men on reddit lol) but where they at IRL? In reality the average middle aged man looks like...a middle aged manI’ve seen older men who age very well, but they are so far outside the norm. The men I’ve known like this were: a vp of a marketing company that I knew through toastmasters who would invite our whole group on long hikes, which he did regularly with his wife and children; my boss who eats vegan, exercises daily, and bakes goodies for the office at least once a month; this one investment banker I met through work, but I don’t know him personally.... and that’s it. So based on my limited sample siz… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/10/20 06:11 AM |
| 38 | REAL Gender Equality as Illustrated in Public Restrooms.In the topic of toilets stalls, many bathrooms treat waste disposal in stalls as an afterthought, because men don’t regularly need to throw anything out that can’t be flushed. So a lot of ladies stalls I’ve been in don’t have the width to accommodate waste baskets so I’m bumping my elbow on it on one side. Most machines at the 24 hour fitness type gyms I’ve been to don’t accommodate people shorter than 5’4”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/10/20 06:01 AM |
| 25 | And there are STILL men AND WOMEN in the comments saying "not all men 🥺🥺🥺". DisgustingThis kind of stuff is why I was taught early on to to make sure my car’s always got gas in it, so I’m never in a situation where I can’t just drive away from a bad situation and wait for day time or to find another, less sketchy station to fill at. So gross. Poor woman. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/10/20 10:30 PM |
| 14 | What in the PiCk Me I’M a CoOL GirL Hell is this????!!!My fiancé somehow manages to work out an hour a day and make me dinner to eat together, not sure why they think it’s such a hard thing to do. Also not sure why they thing “binge drink on the regular” is a positive thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/10/20 08:22 AM |
| 5 | Shut down an LVM at work who tried to treat me like his personal secretaryThis left a bad taste in my boss’s mouth And I did. I went to my boss and she gave me the go-ahead to write an official email to him cc’ing his boss, her, and the head of our department. When the head of my department found out the full story, she said she had never asked me specifically to write the email and she was outraged that he was using her name to bully people into getting what he wanted. I'm loving the fact that you have a strong female chain of command backing you here. Good on yo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/10/20 05:41 PM |
| 7 | Should I leave him or can we work it out?Okay, so I did end up reading it. Here are my nitpicks: I don’t enjoy that, so that and the other elements like him discarding my unhappiness as a ‘sounds like a ‘you’ problem’ have made me keep more distance to him. Sounds like a "you" problem? The disrespect!! He believes part of me being shut down is due to grieving my grandmother who I was close with a year and a half ago Even if this is the case, shouldn't he be a lot more sensitive about it? His assertion that he thinks you're in grieving … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/20 05:23 PM |
| 7 | Should I leave him or can we work it out?Honestly I didn’t get any further than the first line. If he really wanted to work things out, he’d already be doing it. Period. Your partner should be doing everything within reason to make you feel happy, safe, and supported. Even if the “problem” is ultimately on you—say it turns out you have undiagnosed depression or something along those lines—a loving partner who values you would be listening to you and looking for solutions to your unhappiness with you. You deserve better than this emotio… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/20 04:51 PM |
| 72 | Say it louder for those LVMs in the backA few years back I decided to get my hair cut short. Literally every man in life except for my brother, father, and boyfriend complained to me that I wasn’t as attractive anymore. Uhm, okay? I wasn’t trying to attract you??? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/20 02:50 AM |
| 11 | I just got called high maintenance🥳Nothing wrong with wanting higher quality stuff. For example with the sheets, If you’re going to sleep in your bed for a third of your life (~8 hours/24 hours a day) then you might as well spring for something that feels good and lasts a long time. Same with clothes and food and anything. Keep your standards high! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/20 10:13 PM |
| 391 | No a laundromat is NOT A DATE !!A guy who actually wanted to see her would not have tried to make that laundromat excuse... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/20 10:05 PM |
| 1 | Is having a Snapchat a red flag?🚩Like any other app, location is opt in. Idk, it seems like you’re hating on social media because you don’t understand it, rather than hating because you understand it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 06:16 PM |
| 2 | Is having a Snapchat a red flag?🚩I’m 30 and Snapchat became normal with my peer group a few years ago. I think up a few years older is fine too; but I’m in a social media conscious area of the US, so everyone’s been on everything for at least a hot minute. Most of us hardly use it anymore, but I know a lot of people use it as a first point of contact instead of something more permanent like Instagram or a phone number. Besides, I like Snapchat’s filters and story feature. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 03:44 AM |
| 5 | When you complain about a beautiful woman for using barely perceptible filters in her pics, it would be a good idea if you didn't look like a sex offender kicked out of a Mennonite community yourself.She looks the same???? Does he not recognize her just because she's wearing a different dress and the lighting's different? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/20 03:59 PM |
| 5 | Is it appropriate to remain friends with a guy friend whom you hooked up with before, while in a relationship with a HVM?Based on your description of your friendship, you’re not even really friend friends anyway. If he’s not consistently bringing up your time together or hitting on you or making you feel weird about your past, then I honestly don’t see the problem, personally. No, do not ever tell men about your sexual past. Never do it. It makes LVM crazy and an HVM wouldn’t care to know, anyway. Again based on the fact that you see him at school and group events, it doesn’t seem like you’re even friends with thi… | /r/askFDS | 28/09/20 02:47 PM |
| 5 | Is asking someone out as a guy unethical?When asking someone out, you assume that you have a chance with the other person. But to have a chance, the other person would be a) Looking for a relationship How would you know if this person is looking for a relationship/not unless you talk to her? and more importantly b) Without better choices, as the lady can just leave at that point to pursue the higher value man. If you’re worried about not being a high enough value man, then the solution is to level up yourself. At a certain point, it’s … | /r/askFDS | 27/09/20 08:59 AM |
| 4 | Women sacrificing their last name and taking husband's last name indirectly treats the wife as a property of the husband. Are the ladies here in FDS still willing to take their husband's last name after marriage or do they consider last names mixing/blending as an option as a sign of equality?I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. I’ve always been staunchly in the “ill keep my name” camp except that now it’s time to get a marriage license and I’m hesitating on whether I do or not want to take my fiancé’s name. Hyphenating is not an option (I don’t like the aesthetic of hyphens for myself, and also I don’t think our names sound good together hyphenated due to syllable count), though whatever name I put on the marriage license, I want to keep going by my maiden name professionally… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/20 08:00 AM |
| 1 | Fiancé provides emotional support and also hand feeds me. 👌We've been together a little over five years. Late 20s, I'm a couple years older than him. We've been engaged for about 9 months now to be married at the end of October, though he wanted to propose for a year or more before he did propose. I just set a particular timeline on my own economic security before considering legal ties, which I expressed to him back when we started dating, and he followed my lead on that timeline. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/20 12:26 AM |
| 5 | The Ben Franklin Effect: people like you if they do things for youInteresting! I haven’t heard of this, but it makes total sense. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 06:35 PM |
| 24 | Live together before marriage? No thanks!For those who don’t want to wait so you can see how he is before signing that marriage contract, I think engagement (with a date in mind) is a happy medium. Otherwise I absolutely agree with this statement. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 07:45 PM |
| 3 | Responses to walk/coffee/bar datesExactly! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 05:34 PM |
| 18 | Responses to walk/coffee/bar datesI like this. About “I only do coffee dates with friends,” An LVM will likely come back with something along the lines of “it’s okay, we can just be friends with something extra ;)”. So that’s good as a filter. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 05:30 PM |
| 72 | NOW THAT'S WHY WE SHOULD VET THEMAlso a warning to ladies: don’t talk about your vetting strategies (what the woman in question allegedly talked about on the 2nd date.) Guys like this are so insecure they try to find something wrong with the woman they’re dating. “I like everything about her except that she’s attracted to the way I asked her out. So now I’m going to destroy her trust in men to prove to her just how bad men are.” ???? What is this logic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 05:24 PM |
| 29 | [VENT] Man fails to understand why his GF is upsetLike maybe he’s not a bad guy No, he is. He broke his promise to avoid patty. He made his own list of chores and broke his promise to do them. He’s “forgetting” to mention where he’s going with his friends. He’s drinking from 11am to 9pm for goodness’ sake. With the texting argument, both of them seem LV at this point. I’d advise Jill that she does not need this high school drama in her life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 05:06 PM |
| 4 | Yet another LVM who will be damned if he allows the woman he claims to love to feel special by having a nice wedding, committing to her officially, and making sure that all their friends and family know it.It’s one thing if his argument was “have a wedding within your means,” but the last paragraph shows his true intention. I personally am only throwing a wedding to make money. (And make my family happy bc it makes me happy to make them happy, but that’s secondary.) All my aunties say I can make a quick buck on it since in our culture everyone pretty much all give cash gifts. Put down all your deposits with credit, then pay it back immediately with cash the guests brought, and they all came out 3-… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 04:48 PM |
| 5 | Typical Scrote attitude right here. It’s not fair that I don’t get sex right away when she had sex with other people! https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/iv4itd/a_lot_of_cynicism_from_men_about_dating_revolves/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmfIf sexual release is a need, do it on your own. Having sex and relations with another person is a WANT, not an absolute need the same way that food, water, and breathing are. Edit: Social interaction is a need too, I understand, and relationships are like that. But like, work on yourself so that your social/romantic interaction isn’t objectifying, before you’re out hear comparing women who aren’t virgins to cars driven by Actual Human Garbage Donald Trump Jr. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/09/20 06:34 PM |
| 31 | An HV reaction to abnormally low sex drive (Commentary in the comments)Hmm, that’s something I hadn’t thought of. In the end, I guess we don’t know OP, so we’ll just have to hope he’s being genuine, or that it’s fake. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/09/20 01:10 AM |
| 27 | The pride they take in talking on themselves like that is just embarrasing at this point...but it's us women who are 'unloyal hoes' and 'gold-diggers' 🙄🙄Nice! I agree... men should frankly be *embarrassed* about begging their ladies for consoles. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 08:38 PM |
| 159 | An HV reaction to abnormally low sex drive (Commentary in the comments)OP posts that his girlfriend's sex drive is pretty much gone. Usually this is a problem because the man wants to have sex and is angry about it, but OP makes it clear that his main concern is that it's a change in their previously active sex life, and he's concerned about her health and if she's going through something. +1 point for OP. He does sit down and communicate with her about it, and takes steps to reassure her about her worries. +1 point. To further assure her, he sets up a romantic nig… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 08:16 PM |
| 6 | Man once again panicking after getting a reality check about open marriagesMy first thought was actually, he pressured her into sex and she just went along with it and did the bare minimum to finish him off, since he was doing the bare minimum to get her off. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 07:38 PM |
| 6 | Man once again panicking after getting a reality check about open marriagesI've actually seen this situation happen in real life a couple times, so I don't doubt it's veracity. Women are far more successful in open relationships by the same reason that women are far more successful at dating in general. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 07:35 PM |
| 26 | Typical Scrote attitude right here. It’s not fair that I don’t get sex right away when she had sex with other people! https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/iv4itd/a_lot_of_cynicism_from_men_about_dating_revolves/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf"I always viewed it as getting a new car that you really need..." Sex (and having a relationship) is not a NEED, and anyone who feels this way is severely deficient in their own life happiness, which having sex (or a relationship) cannot fix. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 03:56 PM |
| 27 | 3 Quality Traits Most Important to You in A HVMFirst, generous. Not just with me, but friends and family too. Mostly with me though. Second, empathetic. I want him to be able to legitimately see my point of view and be able to consider other people have experiences that are vastly different than his. Third, ambitious. He doesn’t have to want to rule the world, but his ambitions should mean something valuable to him that make him more than a mindless zombie looking for the next cheap thrill. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/09/20 06:28 AM |
| 1 | LVM to HVMBeing treated with respect is important. But so is chemistry. Don’t feel bad for you not feeling chemistry with him... if he is a man of true value, he’ll understand. | /r/askFDS | 17/09/20 06:21 AM |
| 20 | How to tell if he's HVYes! I don’t like to refer to people as high value; I usually just focus on behavior. This also helps for people leveling up... when someone self identifies as a LVW or LVM, it psychologically makes it harder to make the effort to improve. So focus on losing the LV actions and actors, and increase your HV ones. Same thing when I discuss negative things too; I purposefully don’t call people racist or sexist, just point out that their actions/words have a racist/sexist effect. Because actions spea… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/09/20 07:26 PM |
| 6 | How to get over someone and move on for goodBlock him on Spotify! Block and delete his phone number! Block him on any and every social media! Sometimes Time is the only thing that helps distance you from somebody, and even then it's not a surefire way. I still sometimes reflect on someone who I dated very briefly 6 years ago and feel sad about it. So I get it. Keep on keeping on. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/09/20 05:17 PM |
| 4 | How to get over someone and move on for goodAre you in contact with this person at all? If so, block him on everything. It's okay to take some time to recover, especially if it's relatively fresh. The best thing to do is to dive headfirst in yourself, your own hobbies and activities. Pick up a craft. Bake your heart out. whatever you want to do. Then, start working on your own life. Identify what parts you want to work on and go for it. Basically, keep busy until you feel too enamoured with your life to reminisce on the past. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 11:06 PM |
| 3 | How to get over someone and move on for goodHmm, I wonder if there's somethign wrong with reddit, because I didn't see this post on AskFDS even when sorting by new. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 11:03 PM |
| 14 | Strategies to force yourself to let go and level-up?Let me remind you that you wrote this: He pressured me into the relationship only to then dump me after a month even though he knew my biggest fear is being dumped out of thin air with no warning signs because that happened to me so many times before. Read it again and again and again and remind yourself that you deserve so much better than him; and he doesn't even want you. So STOP TRYING. | /r/askFDS | 15/09/20 11:01 PM |
| 6 | Do I have a chance with a HVW?mods just instituted commenter approval that’s reliant on a previous post history in main fds. Our guy might be caught in the crossfire with that. edit: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskFDS/comments/is7h4k/if_you_want_to_be_approved_to_comment_on_this_sub/ | /r/askFDS | 15/09/20 09:16 PM |
| 8 | Do I have a chance with a HVW?Men aren’t allowed to post comments, but hopefully he’s paying attention. | /r/askFDS | 15/09/20 08:54 PM |
| 4 | How to get over someone and move on for goodIt's been around forever; it used to be a place for men to ask us questions. But as of a few days ago, the mods retired the "Seeking Advice" flair and asked women seeking advice to post there instead. https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/irgdxw/were_retiring_the_seeking_advice_flair_and/ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 08:24 PM |
| 14 | Guy says that he doesn’t have priorities for a relationship now (even though he hooked me in with the promise of having one.)I posted on your deleted thread in fds after stating I wouldn’t read it, but actually did read a little bit of it now, just the speech that you put at the end. Does this guy have no shame? He just sounds pitiful. Anyway, my opinion still stands. If he’s too busy for you, he’s too busy for you. Cut and run. | /r/askFDS | 15/09/20 07:19 PM |
| 8 | How to get over someone and move on for goodThis post is better suited to r/askfds | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 06:44 PM |
| 10 | How to navigate a guy who says he doesn’t have time for a relationship right now because other priorities?I didn’t read the post. You don’t. He says he’s too busy for you, then he’s too busy for you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 02:53 PM |
| 11 | UPDATE: We are changing our policy on polyamory!I was in love with a poly woman once. (I’m bi, by the way. She’s a lesbian.) She had an incredible way of making me feel loved and seen whenever we were physically together, though at the time I was being “consciously single.” (Aka, I was supposed to be taking a break from dating to focus on myself, but I was sleeping around instead.) I thought it was an okay set up for me at the time because I purposefully didn’t want to be in a committed relationship and I was enjoying sleeping around with mul… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 06:55 PM |
| 2 | It's not your responsibility to make your or any man feel like a manBy the way, the woman in this screenshot isn't the main character of CRA, but will be the main character in the sequel. CRA's story is focused on the protagonist meeting and finding her footing among her serious boyfriend's extended family when they go to his best friend's wedding. The main conflicts are class (she's a professor at NYU or something, so she's no slouch, but he comes from a crazy rich family (hence the film's title)), and culture (she's Asian-American, born and raised in America; … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 06:59 AM |
| 108 | Do I have a chance with a HVW?Men aren’t generally hated more, it’s just that in general women are seeing that the men on the dating market are generally not treating us well. If you hold yourself to a high standard of self-sufficiency, reliability, and empathy, along with the other trade marks of being a functional adult, then you’re nowhere near the league of the dysfunctional men being “hated on” in the main sub. Preface over. To your question, dating is intimidating and hard by nature. Take some time to situate yourself … | /r/askFDS | 13/09/20 11:04 PM |
| 1 | We’re retiring the “Seeking Advice” flair and redirecting all personal relationship questions to r/AskFDSThanks for looking at it! I don’t think it was caught a lot before because that sub wasn’t that active with sometimes weeks between new submissions, but looks like activity will increase considering this pinned post, so I thought I’d mention it. Thanks for taking action so quickly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 08:38 PM |
| 1 | We’re retiring the “Seeking Advice” flair and redirecting all personal relationship questions to r/AskFDSIdk where best to bring up this issue, but there is rampant rule breaking on ask fds in regards to the men not giving advice there, leading to a lot of hateful men posting replies to other men that end up staying up for a while. I’ve been reporting every one I’ve seen, but I was wondering regarding flairs, Is there a plan to implement an approval system in askfds like on here where replies can only be approved after the user has been vetted and flaired? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 08:17 PM |
| 23 | To block or not to blockIf you have to ask, yes block. | /r/askFDS | 13/09/20 03:56 AM |
| 27 | FDS is anti polyamoryFrom the handbook and posts I’ve read around here, basically what you say in the first part of your post. It’s not illegal to date casually, no logical reason for it to be made illegal, it’s just a recipe for disaster. Same thing with polyamory. It’s a recipe for disaster, but adults can do what they want. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 12:26 AM |
| 4 | Flowers on a first date?I think flowers are great, got some from my fiancé in our first date. Especially if you’ve known each other previous to dating. If you bring flowers to first dinner together, you better get a bigger/nicer bouquet for special occasions like anniversary. That said, OP I think if you get her flowers you should also think of how to store them on the date. You should think of it on your own and prepare for that, not make us or her do the mental labor of it. But of course your mileage will vary. Other… | /r/askFDS | 12/09/20 05:54 PM |
| 4 | I have a chronic illness too, and I cant tell you how many times i heard that it is all in my head🤡thousands of women suffer from malpractice only because they are WOMENI remember when my primary doctor who had treated my family for years moved, and I had my first checkup with the new doctor at the facility. I went in to get a re-up on eczema cream and epi-pen, but doctor was ridiculously adamant that he didn't want to 1) prescribe me the allergy medicine without knowing what my allergies are, and 2) prescribe me the eczema cream in case my eczema was an allergic reaction to a bug bite I had recently. He refused to believe me that I knew my own body, how long I… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 06:59 AM |
| 19 | Shaggy in the song "It Wasn't Me" is the true definition of NVM.The plot is that the guy singing got caught, so he comes over and asks his bro shaggy what he should do. Shaggy raps in the verse that he should just tell her that it wasn’t him she saw. “But,” says the first guy, “she literally saw me with her own two eyes?? Like in the shower and the sofa and the kitchen??” And shaggy says, “nope, just lie and say it wasn’t you.” Then the first guy says the verse you quoted, basically saying, “dude, your reasoning doesn’t make any sense at all... im not gonna … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 04:13 PM |
| 43 | Ladies who are not single, how long did it take you to find your HVM?He was 23, I was 25. I was a recovering single-by-choice pickme. I had been single for a little over a year, and had recently decided to stop messing around with clowns and get serious about finding a partner. Green flags: We were friends for a few months at first, and by friends I mean we were friendly classmates and he was never crass or pushy with me in anyway. No stealth dating, no asking me out uncomfortably, no attempts at bad flirting in case it was unwanted. he’s generous. He would invit… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 09:40 PM |
| 2 | Friend-Zoned to Potential Love Interest?If you won’t say it, I’ll say it. This man is not HVM. Doesn’t seem an NVM, but sounds like a classic martyr/white knight. The fact that he’s ever brought up the friend zone at all, to her face is so not high value. Forcing his presence on OP and pressuring her into a relationship, as well as the trauma bonding is also low value. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 07:37 PM |
| 3 | Finally they realized!“Truecels” are a lot more realistic about this than your average incel. It doesn’t make them any more pleasant though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 04:33 PM |
| 17 | Friend-Zoned to Potential Love Interest?u/unrequited_one It looks like you tried to reply but your comments were probably removed because you’re on a throwaway, but on your profile I was able to see the first line of your reply that you feel like you can only have one or the other: attraction and LVM, or no attraction and HVM. I’m going to tell you now: you desperately need to read and absorb Fds, the handbook, and all the posts about attraction, male friendships, and scarcity mindset. I will also tell you from experience that as long… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 06:49 AM |
| 58 | Friend-Zoned to Potential Love Interest?“I’m still trying to open myself” NO. If you’re not attracted to him, do not entertain him as a prospect. Do not force yourself to be. The fact that he keeps hanging around you and apparently vents to you that he feels like he is in the friend zone with you means he is NOT a real friend. It is LOW VALUE behavior. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 03:43 AM |
| 9 | "A man being rich is like a girl being pretty." Marilyn is speaking nothing but facts. 🗣️💯 What are your thoughts Ladies?I haven’t seen the movie, but just watching the scene the way that marilyn and her fiancé are playfully joking with each other makes it clear to me that she’s joking with the FIL about being the wallet because he’s being gross and sexist about her being a gold digger. And then she goes on to literally say “you might not marry [for money], but doesn’t it help?” Saying that, yes, that is part of the equation but it’s not the full thing. The few seconds at the beginning where her fiancé fully suppo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 07:32 PM |
| 82 | Ah yes, let’s continue to applaud fathers for their mere physical PRESENCE in their children’s lives.The bar for fathers is so, so low. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:18 PM |
| 3 | I did it! I ended things with him! But then I was weak again :(For sure! When I was in college, there were plenty of people who I was in clubs with that I wouldn’t be friends with otherwise, and that was perfectly fine. If you can think of anyone else in your club that you have that kind of relationship with, try to treat this guy the same way. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:15 PM |
| 6 | I did it! I ended things with him! But then I was weak again :(Clean break, girl. You know you’re too twisted to do something fwb/casual, and he’s no good for you as a short term relationship. You can say you’ll “stay friends” since you’ll be in the same social circle, but there’s no need to actually be friends. Don’t text him or talk to him outside of activities. If he tries to deepens conversation, leave him on read or redirect to conversation about your club. You’ve got this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/09/20 11:52 PM |
| 26 | Being directly targeted just because I enjoy being here.r/fdssuperfans | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/09/20 11:48 PM |
| 14 | I made a comment on here earlier about how I feel uncomfortable wearing leggings to school & this is what a scrote had to say 🥱R/fdssuperfans | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/09/20 11:47 PM |
| 67 | Saw a post about men who get insecure about pretty boys/hvm who actually care about their appearances. Thought I'd post a cherry on top 😂 (there are 2 images here)Lol boy bands and pop stars have been getting the same critiques for years, from one direction and beiber (when he was a teen, before he was publicly an asshole) to *NSYNC and Backstreet Boys, and even further back to even the Beatles. These artists’ managers know that their audience loves a well groomed, sensitive guy and lean into that image, and then these groups are disparaged as being feminine or gay. It seems to me that having a throng of female fans is very opposite of either of those thi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/20 10:03 PM |
| 16 | Peak LVM right hereI feel bad for both the ex and current wife of this LVM. He's definitely looking her up so he can look at her pics and jerk off, and that's the least of the concerns here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/20 08:01 PM |
| 69 | Mindset shift from comedian Sindhu Vee. She really nails Pickme culture at the endAha hahha! Thanks for sharing this! Everything about this joke is perfection. Her delivery, her physicality, and that searing burn right there at the end. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/20 07:53 AM |
| 5 | When you witness the birth of the newest FDS memberMy ex hated drinking water; to trick himself into drinking water, he used Mio water flavoring to sweeten it up before drinking it. I just don’t get it. Like, I get preferring something flavored to something plain, but you still gotta drink water to survive. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/08/20 10:39 PM |
| 37 | Woman finds out dirty dick husband is cheating with his mistress again. She sues the Pickmeisha mistress AND she sues her husband since he bought a condo to use as a love shack. Looks like the condo will be going bye bye."the other woman" in this case is also cheating on her own husband, so she's even more of an asshole. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 10:07 PM |
| 1 | I really love this tiktok. As someone that is currently learning to love myself and do things alone. Seeing ppl do this encourages meI mean, it *is* a parody, you're not wrong there, but it's not mean-spirited and there is truth to it that people are relating to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 03:31 PM |
| 25 | LVM starting young. 😂Highly doubt he’s 12, he only said that because is a lower number than 13..... could be 12, but IME guys like this will lie like this just to be contrary because all he’s doing is just trolling. My guess is more like 15-17, which is still young to be creeping. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 08:49 PM |
| 2 | Which Movies Do you Consider a Red Flag if A Man Raves About it and Says it's his Favorite?500 days of summer I think shows tom to be an unlikeable and bitter person, the directors and lead actors have been quoted saying that was what they were going for (even jgl who played the lead), which is how I felt about him. His redemption is hinted at the end and is directly correlated with him leveling up in life, rather than someone stopping down to his level. so really I think it says something about a culture where people interpret 500 days of summer as “poor Tom” and feel manipulated int… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 09:44 PM |
| 17 | Which Movies Do you Consider a Red Flag if A Man Raves About it and Says it's his Favorite?Oooooh I hate fight club so much. I enjoyed the movie, but its not number one favorite material and over time its cultural importance drove me to dislike. Tyler Durden is a bad dude, his whole organization is toxic masculinity Inc. But every man who loves the movie idolizes durden and his masculinity. The author of the book, I think, kind of wrote this plot line poses the question of masculinity as if he is being a moral about it, by showing how this toxic masculinity (not the term at the time o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 10:39 PM |
| 13 | Disgusting scrote was Richie rich and still made her sell her dead mothers violin for THEIR dog’s surgery!!!He wants a prenup protecting his money after mooching off of her for 4 years what a douchhhhe. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 10:18 PM |
| 6 | LMAAAOO another queen out there driving away her scrote. We support you sis. If a man is uncomfortable with this sub, he's NOT A HVM.Most LVM will not be able to fake it for the length of time it should take to properly vet a man. They’ll get too pushy about sex or hate spending their money on courting or somehow just slip up. The NVM who are good at manipulation are already good at love bombing and already know that treating women well (courting them etc) is the way to a woman’s heart. It’s not rocket science, just forgotten cultural norms. They too will let their guard down at some point because if they aren’t hvm, the goal… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/20 03:22 PM |
| 18 | Scrote gets what he deservesLol no she’s not ta. The fact that he even tried to keep her from consulting counsel means he’s not even pretending at making this fair. He deserves to get dragged through the mud for it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 07:49 PM |
| 6 | I was only trying to help 😭OnLine Dating | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 03:13 PM |
| 6 | I've seen this image posted around before with various captions, but this one upsets me the most. If this girl's FATHER is placing so much value on her sexuality, how does she stand a chance with the rest of the world?Taylor’s still Christian, as far as I know. Comparison doesn’t make any sense for a number of reasons, but that was my first thought. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 11:17 PM |
| 19 | as a black woman does anyone else feel like white men treat you better than other men do?Not black, am woc. I used to answer questions on ask reddit and ask women about being in interracial relationships and then get nasty pms from scrotes of color accusing me of being racist and a white man worshipper. The thing is, I’ve always believed in dating men who go after me, and it’s majority been white men. So I feel you on this dilemma. My approach would be to just worry about the men who do notice you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 07:01 PM |
| 28 | How do you ladies respond to questions about your body count/last time you had sex?If it’s not in the handbook, it should be. Only LVM care and have the audacity to ask. An HVM will consider it none of his business and will correctly believe it rude and ungentlemanly to even ask. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 06:48 PM |
| 85 | Some good adviceI don’t see a problem. If he turns abusive, then you have the money to get out. If he never turns abusive and you live a happy marriage until old age, you’ll have some extra money saved up to treat yourselves. Win win. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 07:18 PM |
| 2 | Navigating finances with your HVMWe split our household budget 50/50; the condo is in my name, so he’s basically paying rent. We’re engaged to be married and are working on a prenup that this property will stay mine and if anything happens to me, the condo will pass to my family. We go 80/20 on grocery/take out when eating at home (him at 80, even though he does majority of cooking etc.) He pays for all our entertainment and electronics and dates unless I’m treating him or getting him a present. For the record, we both make dec… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 05:56 PM |
| 85 | Reposting this again because I needed to remove the names. This jerk just ruined a nice memory I had of my dad.Even if is a son, it would be sick for a dad to do that. Ugh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/08/20 10:30 PM |
| 3 | Sounds about right.here is where I saw it: https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10223202604843782&id=1543103828&anchor_composer=false I couldn’t get the fb comments to open up in reddit app so you’ll have to open it in your browser. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 11:25 PM |
| 8 | Sounds about right.Did you just not all men here? I mean, I agree with you. I’ve had sex with plenty of men and most of them were lazy but a few were really really good. Not all men should be pretty well understood I think. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 08:13 PM |
| 94 | I can't believe this woman got gaslit by reddit when her NVM bf was more worried about food than her injuryGot to the last page where she talks about how after talking to him he clarified that he was just afraid of her burning down the house so now everything's hunky dory. But like, he still didn't give her the burn care she needed. He still didn't comfort her about the pain. He could have just gone and checked himself, it wouldve tking a second. He's also abusive over the whole food thing. She's walking on fucking eggshells worried about the pizza getting burnt and finishing the food he buys for her… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 03:19 PM |
| 63 | Butt hurtEvery time I see a guy complain about the saying "men are trash" and I scope out their profile, they actually are trash. So. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 02:57 PM |
| 3 | Reminder: we don’t need prom and a wedding to have an excuse to celebrate, we can celebrate without a manlol, you're right. I was looking at the pic on my phone, and I recognized Channing Tatum, but not Amanda. whupppps. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 12:08 AM |
| 4 | Reminder: we don’t need prom and a wedding to have an excuse to celebrate, we can celebrate without a manlol, you're right. I was looking at the pic on my phone, and I recognized Channing Tatum, but not the woman. whupppps. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 12:08 AM |
| 7 | Slightly creepy colleague. Is this real or in my head? How do I navigate in the midst of LVM colleagues?The unwanted texting and calling is bad. The halloween costumes ask is worse. It’s so sad that women are conditioned to see these type of harassment as “harmless” and not worth reporting. I’ve seen it too many times. I too have an older, male work mentor who I get along with socially, but the difference is that he’s not trying to text me all hours of the day for no reason, and when we talk about non work things, he’s checking in on my life like an uncle does and giving me tips for my future, not… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 10:14 PM |
| 4 | Reminder: we don’t need prom and a wedding to have an excuse to celebrate, we can celebrate without a manThe photo made me curious, because I remember Channing and Jenna (the couple in the photo edit: lol, didn't recognize amanda bynes on my tiny phone screen, but it did make me think about Channing tatum's marriage in relation to the quote) being held up as a good celebrity relationship. Looks like they got divorced in 2018, and by the end of 2019 she had hitched herself to a new guy and was pregnant with his baby. I don’t know the story behind her relationship with either of them, just that if sh… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 10:02 PM |
| 1 | Saw this post in the dating subreddit and realized the importance of being happy alone. You can still feel intimacy and closeness with friends and family. Feeling this way leads to codependency.I always find it weird when someone uses the word “mate” instead of partner. Like humans are breeding animals. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 07:15 PM |
| 3 | Men have it so hard😔Agreed. (As a practitioner of 3 different types up until my 20s.) Most martial arts have a philosophical component to them about instilling humbleness, work ethic, and the value of healthy competition. The types of martial arts and practitioners that are looked down on as “low culture” are there just because it’s “badass” and are already just low value toxic masculine people and spaces and they have nothing else going for them. The mcdojos who are just there to make a quick buck, or guys who jus… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 05:00 PM |
| 3 | Men have it so hard😔I do agree with one of the ideas posted about male objectification and how (for example) it is unhealthy for both actors and viewers for men in like, riverdale (especially when they’re supposed to be playing teenagers!) to be required to be ripped for the camera when the level of ripped-ness requires dangerous methods to upkeep. But the framing is all wrong, because he’s acting as though it’s women’s fault for the double standard when it really should be everyone against the cultural norm of ext… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 04:53 PM |
| 1 | Imagine being this much of a butthurt clownI googled that restaurant and I gotta say the twitter op of this post chose a gorgeous venue for the proposal. Beautiful bouquet too, and love that he was so excited to show off about the engagement. Classy proposal right there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 05:55 AM |
| 4 | The real reason FDS pisses people off so muchThanks. I don’t get that mindset at all; if it was the other way around and someone I disagree with agrees with me, I think “well, this thing we agree on is so obvious that even this moron agrees with it.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/20 11:46 PM |
| 3 | Is it acceptable to only prefer dinner dates?Not surprised in the least. Men like this are everywhere. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 11:12 PM |
| 12 | Is it acceptable to only prefer dinner dates?Read the handbook. Dinner dates are the preferred norm in FDS, especially for first dates. Going Dutch is not. HVM will be generous enough to pay for the dinner; someone who is afraid of women taking them for a ride over one measly dinner is LVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 09:14 PM |
| 80 | I wonder how many pickmeishas say "tee hee hee I'd marry/screw you!" in response to this terrible opening question. I unmatched after this exchange.Yeah but like, Barney’s love is all about treating everyone right, which is more than you can be assured of from most men like this guy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 12:42 AM |
| 14 | Thanks to FDS I can't watch romcoms without picking them apartI actually love 500 days of summer because it’s actually about how it’s his perception that her purpose is to be there to comfort him. It’s explicitly meant to play romcom tropes straight from his perspective, but in the aftermath of their break up and his heart break, everyone’s telling him that he’s the one who built her up in his head and is being the garbage person. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 08:03 AM |
| 4 | Thanks to FDS I can't watch romcoms without picking them apartI had the exact same thought. I still enjoyed the movie and thinking about the paradox, but when it got to that part I just kept thinking, that’s so typical that the woman is the one doing the mental load while the man would prefer staying exactly where he is. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 02:51 AM |
| 155 | This is a very valid point.For the younger ladies here, even if he’s 15, you should still walk away from red flags. He might be capable of changing, but he won’t change if he isn’t given a reason to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 07:03 PM |
| 129 | She asks them to hold each other responsible. They retaliate with garbage comments as expected, thread gets locked.If you think men sexist then you should get raped! That’ll totally prove that men aren’t sexist!!!! /s | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 06:36 PM |
| 3 | Empirical evidence that men are more often assholes than womenLVM in the comments of aita always claim about a female bias in judgements, so this chart also confirms their view that “AITA is whipped.” 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 06:28 PM |
| 2 | Empirical evidence that men are more often assholes than womenSource: r/amitheasshole Scrape the posts for gender/age tags (when they say something like: “am I (F43) the asshole”) and the final judgement tags. Per the info at the top, they are including all ages and excluding posts with less than 25 responses. Then take the percentage of YTA judgements of the whole, and plot the chart. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 06:24 PM |
| 5 | How to handle this situation?DO NOT TELL THE NEW GUY ABOUT THIS. It’s none of his concern, frankly, especially if you are not official. getting stalked by your ex falls into both the “don’t tell about your sexual history” and “don’t tell about your abuse history” categories. They will never get over it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 08:53 PM |
| 3 | Umbrella Academy discussion: HV and LV characters in relationships. [SPOILERS]“When she gays a chance” Not sure if on purpose or autocorrect, but brilliant either way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 08:22 PM |
| 5 | Umbrella Academy discussion: HV and LV characters in relationships. [SPOILERS]Raymond (Allison’s husband) is the absolute best, HVM all the way. My sister and I screamed at the TV whenever he was onscreen because we didn’t want Allison to lie to him, break his heart, or get him killed. Luther is sweet, but his daddy issues that manifest as not having a backbone or his body issues, which makes him not an HVM. This is a series about abused and emotionally neglected adults, they’re all too mentally unstable to be HV. Even Allison, who is the best adjusted of the bunch. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 02:25 PM |
| 31 | Have you ever had your career/job fetishized?LVM will sexualize any job/career, especially when you’re younger. My first job out of college was a legal assistant, and men on tinder would just start saying they love a woman in office clothes. It was gross. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 06:58 AM |
| 5 | Why are strip clubs the norm?For LVM/NVM, they justify that men are just visually stimulated and need variety in their lives to stay sexually engaged. And especially if they go with friends obviously there's nothing wrong with it!! Vom. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 05:34 PM |
| 9 | Let’s discuss PUA tactics, so we can guard ourselves against them!Neil Strauss went on to write “the Truth”, which is all about how the mindset of “the Game” failed him and how he had difficulty forming and maintaining fulfilling relationships. Too bad more people don’t see that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/08/20 08:51 PM |
| 19 | “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for a while...We met on Tinder”I’m happy to hear that someone at the cops took her seriously. I hope the one who turned her away first got reprimanded. (Probably not tho.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/08/20 08:44 PM |
| 9 | Let’s discuss PUA tactics, so we can guard ourselves against them!The Godfather of PUA is this guy who goes by the moniker Mystery. I’ve thought about going into his methods in detail on this sub before, but mostly it boils down to being flashy, trying to talk down on women until their self esteem is non existent, and never taking no as an answer, even if it takes multiple drinks, getting her isolated from her friends, and literally putting her hand on your dick. Here’s a deep dive into his Mystery Method: https://youtu.be/J9dI6CoNSrc | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/08/20 06:20 PM |
| 20 | LVM dress low valueMy worst inappropriately dressed date showed up in cargo pants and T-shirt and unbrushed hair. I actually was already annoyed with him because I decided to meet him after dinner with my cohort and our professor on my way home, so I asked him to find a place that was midway between where I was and where he was, but then when he sent me the address it was a place down the street from him and a fifteen minute detour for me. And the place he chose was already closed for the day. So we ended up just … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 08:38 PM |
| 8 | Me, Monogamy and Mate-GuardingYour dating strategy is not LVM. Not enough information in other areas, just remember that for this part of your strategy: If the other person wants to just keep on dating multiple people, I figure it out for myself for how long can I do that and move on after that time. Your goal is to continue to woo and court her, until she sees your value as the person she wants to be with. You have to be proactive in showing that you would be good for each other, and if you're interested in being her partne… | /r/askFDS | 24/07/20 03:30 PM |
| 18 | Was I right to block? We had only just started talking from Tinder and I mentioned not being into team sports...his comment/emoji felt weird. Thoughts?First message: Can’t drive, isn’t even planning on learning Second: clearly a sexual overture Third: talking about weird boyfriend shit when you haven’t met while also kind of negging about your height. None of this is good. Smart move blocking. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 10:54 PM |
| 6 | Was I right to block? We had only just started talking from Tinder and I mentioned not being into team sports...his comment/emoji felt weird. Thoughts?Nah you’re being smart! Stay safe. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 10:51 PM |
| 9 | I want the pattern for this, for my own daughter's room!puts on literature analysis hat you are correct in taking note of the extra syllable, but because the way the stanzas are organized I think the fact that both of these lines match with that extra syllable and are both the fourth line of a stanza/second instance of a rhyme, that extra syllable matches. Also, what you’re referring to is meter, not rhyme. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 10:45 PM |
| 31 | I want the pattern for this, for my own daughter's room!The "young" is there to match the meter of the odd lines. (accented syllables in bold and italics below. Note the odd lines have the same pattern; the even lines are almost the same, except the 4th lines in both stanzas have 2 un-emphasized syllables at the start of the line. I think the reason your ear thinks it would be better without "young" is because the line following it also is missing a syllable from the previous pattern.) I have a deadly nightshade So twisted does it grow With berries… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 08:01 PM |
| 54 | This is emotionally manipulative and LVM are passing it off as advice. You do NOT have to be available 24/7! You do NOT have to text back right away! If a man uses manipulative tactics on you, no matter how silly or trivial it may seem, DUMP HIM!It wasn’t even a full ten minutes before he resorted to the ex girlfriend line. ?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 11:24 PM |
| 1 | Are terms of endearment and pet names an orange flag?All your examples are just smarmy coming from a guy. Just classic machismo. There’s a certain old school charm to it when my aunties and uncles call me those nicknames, but you know... they’re family. If I’m getting a pet name from a guy it has to be something personal, something that takes effort. Here’s an example: early on in our relationship, my fiancé sent me this video, thinking I’d like it. https://youtu.be/h4srcLhIJZI (He was right.) in subsequent months he started calling me these nickn… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 09:06 PM |
| 13 | Are men really biologically hardwired to want to look at other women?An age old nature vs nurture debate. Nature: I think straight/bi men are biologically hardwired to find women attractive and look at them, more so than the other way around. It falls in line with the general biological drive of most animal species. Nurture: I also think that society has set perceptions on how much this is acceptable. Men learn from their environment how acceptable this is, and high value men reject the idea that men are animals that cannot control their thoughts and actions. Lik… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/20 11:00 PM |
| 38 | A true catch“Don’t be flattered I swiped on you I swipe on everybody” I like how they project that they have no standards and yet think they are above everyone in the same breath. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/20 04:56 PM |
| 9 | Is it normal for a long term relationship to feel like more of a friendship?Just because it’s common doesn’t mean that it’s right. That said, what do mean more like a friendship? Like there’s no romance anymore (not really a good sign) or that your chemistry and isn’t as fiery or intense as the beginning, but is instead mostly just warm and fond (not really a bad thing)? Either way, best to pinpoint if your relationship needs/must haves are getting met. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/20 04:09 PM |
| 47 | Guys who play video games, obsess over cars in a childish way, or collect stupid piece of plastic as "hobbies"Eh, I find that men who play co-op “bro” shooter games to be heavily steeped in toxic masculinity, the competitive side bringing out the worst ”alpha male” traits. A lot of the competitive gaming massive multiplayers are also generally problematic because the games are designed to facilitate addiction. But there are games out there that are more like story telling or cinematic experiences, or indie games that are short and though provoking. I think that an interest in those types of game isn’t b… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 03:52 AM |
| 2 | "Some women think because they look good, men owe them money"You know, He’s right on this point: “any help I render is from the good of my heart.” That’s why the generosity of an HVM is so valuable—because he has that good in his heart. LVM who are not generous are just showing off their little shriveled hearts. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 03:47 AM |
| 12 | Scrote steals photo to make people believe he has a girlfriend.It’s been an extension of the “I have a girlfriend in canada” lie lonely people tell sometimes. Stealing pictures and pretending that person is your partner has been going on since social media was invented. I’ve known a few girls who had their pictures stolen for this purpose. Even way back in 2005 a kid in my high school had created a fake MySpace account for a girl so he could pretend he had “proof” that he had a girlfriend. It’s weird :/ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/07/20 08:48 AM |
| 16 | Let's stop using libfem language. "Sex Work" is not a thing - the correct term is Prostitution.I always thought prostitution was specifically for sex and sex worker was a broader term for other things that are sexual? Like strippers who don’t get paid for sex acts would be sex workers, but not prostitutes. Only fans/pin up models who sell nude photos would be sex workers, but not prostitutes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 07:50 PM |
| 4 | Do you ever just wonder why you still like men...Tangentially.... watching the T-swift documentary was really interesting. She talks about how incredibly lucky and fulfilled she feels for being a female performer who has been able to last as long as she has and put out as many albums she has with as much control over her own image and content as she did. And she talks about how (at the time of filming) she was almost certain that Lover could be her last chance at having a successful album that can reach out to the world, because of the absolut… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 08:47 PM |
| 3 | How do you ladies feel about men using OnlyFans?I know I keep good company because the few men in my life ruthlessly mock the whole concept and their user base. Tbf the only man whose phone I have access to is my fiancé’s so I can’t be sure my other friends don’t use only fans, but still. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 08:31 PM |
| 7 | Trying to put FDS into practice. Critique me, ladies!I like your first response lolll. I would have ghosted him after that burn. That said, Since you did continue... instead of saying “Thursday could work” I would have said something like “Right now my schedule is open on Thursday and Saturday,” and actually given him a couple of nights I’d really be free to give him a legitimate chance at working with my schedule; to me. if I don’t want a wishy washy response, I’m not going to be wishy washy when I’m communicating at him. I wouldn’t have said “ma… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 05:42 PM |
| 7 | Caption:’This is why I don’t take her out anymore’ bf complains of her taking a picture of her food 🙄The man boy in his user name is fitting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 01:48 AM |
| 76 | Why the moment you remind a taken man, who has been hitting on you, that he has a girlfriend, he immediately becomes hostile?Lol this guy is such an ass and is just upset that you won’t let him cheat with you. Also, pretty much all legitimate business dinners I’ve seen, each party’s significant other is invited by default. Glad you saw through his bs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 01:46 AM |
| 11 | If you are a woman, DO NOT join the military! They don’t give a fuck about you, and the men there pray on women and get away with it.I spent a few hours last week reading posts on the tag #iAmVanessaGuillen on Facebook and Twitter where female (and some male, mostly gay ones) service members and veterans shared their stories about abuse. It’s really awful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 10:00 PM |
| 4 | Assertive Women/ HVW on TV?Jessica Pearson from suits is great. Name partner at the law firm, she’s consistently confident and capable. It’s been a while since I watched, but I remember liking that her romantic subplot was with a man who respected all that about her and the drama was from the nature of their work rather than the typical chafing of a man intimidated by her being more powerful than him. I especially like her in middle seasons of the series after the show becomes more of an ensemble show so she has more airt… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 01:49 AM |
| 81 | The volume in this bus is too loud! Remember, there's nothing a LVM fears more than a woman with options, because she has the option to leave him. Practice your independence unapologetically.Yes that’s why it’s a trope that virgins don’t get murdered, as hilighted in the Scream franchise. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 07:55 PM |
| 2 | Might be jumping the gun, but this is a really good sign of genuine interest in me as a person!Just stay safe! Good luck with this one. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 07:21 PM |
| 18 | Might be jumping the gun, but this is a really good sign of genuine interest in me as a person!I’m always wary about “give me your number so we can get to know each other better outside of the app.” Numbers can give away a lot. I can find a person’s work place with a number. Once he has your number, if you block him he can just keep getting burner numbers and harassing you. Staying within the app gives you the ability to report him if he does anything worthy of reporting. Personally, when I was online dating I learned very quickly not to give out my phone number until after the second dat… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 07:14 PM |
| 5 | "Sk8er Boi" by Avril Lavigne is such a pickme anthem. I'm embarrassed by how much I loved that song when I was a teenager.This song is about Deryck Whibley of Sum 41: http://www.mtv.com/news/1621834/avril-lavigne-confirms-split-with-sum-41s-deryck-whibley/ They reportedly met when she was 17 and he was 20. They started dating and they married when she was 21 and he was 25. They divorced when she was 29. Tabloids at the time pin all the blame on her being irrational and manipulative, reporting that she “dumped” him and she “kicked” him out of their home, but I’m sure there were other issues. Like, his drinking, drug… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 06:53 PM |
| 12 | A friend suggested FWB. Cut him off?So if I’m getting this right.... your mutual friend told you that the colleague used to have a crush on you and wanted to ask you out, but then he chickened our and became friends with you instead, and now he’s trying to push for fwb? Yeah just cut him out of your life. Nowadays it’s popular to think the relationship progression is friends -> sex -> “relationship”, thereby conveniently passing the courtship phase. (Of course the progress often drops at the “sex” part because men become less inve… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 06:22 PM |
| 8 | Exposing a cheater - Muslim Fuckboy versionI don’t think that not seeing your message or responding to your request right away means that much; Some people just don’t ever look at requests or messages from unknown people, or sometimes ever. I am pretty frequent on ig but I only check my messages every few days. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 06:12 PM |
| 3 | All women should read this book: 'Every Man Sees You Naked' by David M. MatthewsIn the first year or so of our relationship, my fiancé told me that men recognize they are pieces of shit because of these things and he had to do a lot of work on himself from when he was a teen to like 21 (I met him when he was 22) to get to be where he still feels like a piece of shit but has actively trained himself out of bad behaviors and mindsets revolving around them. But honestly, I think he’s overestimating most other men because I highly doubt they all think as poorly of these mindset… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/20 07:44 PM |
| 15 | The males are falling apart because COVID19 is forcing them to actually parent their kids nowAnd then! They fight for part time custody only because otherwise they have to pay child support. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/06/20 09:22 PM |
| 12 | What led you to find this sub?Honestly don’t remember how I found my way here. I am in a happy relationship with a man who puts me first and treats me right, but when I found this sub I thought of my sister and her past relationships, of my friends and their struggles dating, and I just kept sending them links from here. And then I stuck around. It’s changed a lot since I first started hanging out, but the core values are still the same. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/20 04:12 PM |
| 11 | I LOVE seeing women looking out for each other elsewhere on redditLooks like r/kibbe based on the user flairs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/20 07:42 AM |
| 2 | PUA's: What women REALLY want is a violent man who threatens to kill them.Not the same line of thought, but this comment reminds me I sometimes miss being a small child so my dad could pick me up and spin me around, it was like having a brief moment of flight. But it has a much different connotation as a grown woman and partner... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/06/20 04:59 PM |
| 8 | Can a very short man be a HVM?Short men can be hvm. You’ll also need to have thicker skin than a taller man, because unfortunately stereotypes and jokes be a thing. Just don’t make the mistake of thinking that you deserve a woman’s attention if she’s not attracted to you even though you are an otherwise good catch. That’s the LVM reaction. | /r/askFDS | 23/06/20 10:35 PM |
| 13 | Does something like LVM music exist ?Most music with lyrics is LVM tbh. All the classic r &b and rap songs about cheating, violence, doing drugs. Country music objectifying wifey women. Pop music exalting casual sex and kink. Or love songs about being in obsessive love. Too many to count. | /r/askFDS | 23/06/20 10:32 PM |
| 77 | Humble men of MatchHe could be hvm if it wasn’t for his attitude. He reeks of geek got glowed up and now holds it over everyone’s head, only to realize that people still don’t like him and instead of connecting it to his personality, it just assumes it’s because everyone else is just basic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/06/20 06:19 PM |
| 5 | Short is Not the ProblemDon't know if I agree. I mean, you can’t really disagree with his experience. Just because cousin henri (or other short hvm men) has a smaller dating pool due to his height doesn’t invalidate the fact that there are also women who have no problem with his height that he could date. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 05:08 PM |
| 18 | Hurt Bae Asks: Why Did You Cheat? Exes Confront Each Other On Infidelity (#HurtBae Video) He says: “Why wouldn’t you just leave?” Always walk away.I was just watching it and he says “I’m a black man living in America so I’ve been judged for things outside of my character my whole life.” Uhhhh... people judging you for being a cheater has nothing to do with you being black and everything to do with you cheating... don’t pull the racism card for this one... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 01:20 AM |
| 48 | Jay Z will always be kinda weird to meBeyoncé is a living legend, one the best performers to ever live, one of the best singers alive (take into account her technique, voice control, versatility) and has already written herself into history books. She is a critically acclaimed, world renowned artist. Yes, she is all those things. But she also is a pickme who remains with this LVM instead of doing the HV thing and leaving him. She has perpetuated pickme culture with hits that include such pickme anthems as “Naughty Girl” and “Drunk i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/06/20 07:55 PM |
| 5 | Women can have it all, they just can't do it all. In the same way, men have had "it all" for years while doing 10% of the parenting and housework. Women should not have to choose between a family and career because their partner is lazy!The sub does advocate for traditional dating rituals, but it doesn’t support misogyny, anti-feminists, and traditional gender roles in the home. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/20 01:18 AM |
| 2 | Women can have it all, they just can't do it all. In the same way, men have had "it all" for years while doing 10% of the parenting and housework. Women should not have to choose between a family and career because their partner is lazy!If he meant that, why bring “the patriarchy” into this as a bogeyman? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/06/20 09:37 PM |
| 7 | I know Men_of_The_wall has been banned but can we talk one second about John McKinnon Miller and Dirk Blocker from Brooklyn 99?This was a hilarious episode about how these characters hit the wall hard, but FYI those are different actors in the bottom pic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/06/20 06:26 PM |
| 54 | 🐍It’s a rubber snake on a fishing rod! Someone else pointed out you can see the shadow of the person reeling it in, and when she picks it up the snake doesn’t move and just flops around. It’s pretty good though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/20 04:39 PM |
| 10 | I’ve seen multiple of thoseSame. My fiancé feels uncomfortable if I spend more than $50 on him for his birthday/Christmas, but will regularly buy me more valuable gifts on any random day just because. We use the PlayStation as our main hub (run Netflix off it and use it for Blu-ray) so I suggested going split on the ps5 but he refuses. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/20 04:08 PM |
| 6 | What do you do when a man who isnt your type is trying hard ?Stop being polite. Tell him you’re not interested and if he persists report his behaviour. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/20 09:51 AM |
| 32 | Potential Love Bombing? Manipulation maybe?It doesn’t feel like love bombing; that is more like showering attention on you so you don’t see his bad qualities. But it definitely is manipulation. The guilt tripping and aggressive passive aggression can not be ignored. Drop it like a hot potato. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/20 09:47 AM |
| 3 | My boyfriend is such a lovely guy, with so many HVM traits - so why aren't I happy?You deserve better. You always do. I didn’t mention in my story, but I did the same thing. I forgave myself for it, and moved forward in my life knowing that I don’t ever want to be in a situation again where I feel like cheating—emotionally or otherwise—is remotely an option. That includes leaving men when I am unhappy being with them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/20 04:04 PM |
| 2 | Cohabiting before marriage?Yeah we had already been talking about our future and timeline for getting married and we had a loose timeline in mind for all that to happen. He knew I would have preferred being engaged before living together, but the timing on my living situation was such that it made sense to move in with each other. He actually would have proposed to me before we even started looking for a place if I didn’t have some family things come up at the time, and he waited until things calmed down after our move fo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 11:13 PM |
| 17 | “b-B-bUt mEn aGe lIkE fInE wInE rEeEeEe“ 🤢🤢the more I look at this the more I think it should go on the choosingbeggars sub. If you don’t post it there, would you mind if I did? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 07:10 PM |
| 62 | “b-B-bUt mEn aGe lIkE fInE wInE rEeEeEe“ 🤢🤢Haha the whole description is like an r/choosingbeggars post. You’re out here looking for a mate because you haven’t managed to find one organically, (well, the one you found already seems to have wised up and separated from you), and you’re out here specifying she be a hot, young, white, skinny chick who has nothing better to do than bear your brood, when you can’t even get the correct version of bear right? And you haven’t even offered anything in return? Good luck with that bruh. Edit: ON CRA… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 05:01 PM |
| 31 | Cohabiting before marriage?I was always of the opinion that I didn’t want to cohabitate until engagement. I ended up compromising by moving in with him after I knew he was the one I wanted to marry... it just felt right. He was actually planning his proposal at that point anyway, and we were engaged two months later so it was pretty much the same thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 02:46 PM |
| 10 | Do friends who have made sexual advances toward you deserve an explaination as to why you're cutting them out?No. They’ll know why you’re ghosting them. If you take the time to explain they’ll try to gaslight you that you put up with it for 5 years why not let them keep doing it? Better to ghost and recognize that they’re not worth your breath. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/20 11:09 PM |
| 5 | FDS thoughts on starting a business with your boyfriend/significant other?I’ve had side businesses ruin friendships. Would never want that with a partner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/20 06:48 PM |
| 50 | 55 year old men on OLDI mean, I doubt axl rose a hvm, but it doesn’t look like was really hitting on her through Twitter to me, just joking about it being a younger version of himself in that pic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/20 10:22 PM |
| 3 | My boyfriend is such a lovely guy, with so many HVM traits - so why aren't I happy?I'm not you, but let me try to relate and give you an example of my own experience: I was in a kind of similar situation with my ex. We lived a few hours apart, and we were both miserable because we couldn't see each other often *and* we weren't happy with where we were in life. I realized that I couldn't take on his unhappiness as my burden; I could only take on what I could control in my own life. This meant prioritizing myself and my own happiness. I didn't break up with him for the same reas… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/20 06:21 PM |
| 8 | My boyfriend is such a lovely guy, with so many HVM traits - so why aren't I happy?If you’re going to keep posting variations of the same question and getting variations of the same responses and then ignoring all your gut instincts and the advice you explicitly came to seek; what are you looking for? I’m not trying to be harsh but I really want you to listen to yourself and be able to explain to us what kind of support you’re looking for here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/20 04:19 PM |
| 4 | Why do I want to leave a good man?I mean, it’s your choice. But from everything you’ve said and posted here and in other posts, I personally feel like you’re both better off single and leveling up on your own. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/20 06:50 AM |
| 9 | Why do I want to leave a good man?Why do I want to leave a good man? Because he’s not actually a good man. Or because being a good man is the bare minimum. Take your pick. I think it's because he has made no effort to date me, and he's blamed a lack of money. We also don't live together after 4.5 years and I'm bored of waiting. No effort to invest in or progress this relationship into something stable and flourishing means he doesn’t care about building a life with you. I love this man and he loves me. He is so loving and caring… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/06/20 07:55 PM |
| 3 | Addressing the 'tough love' commenting in the FDS community.I love this sub but also I hate it. There are a lot of little things I find under the surface that bother me, and I periodically have to take a break from here. I find that some members can get toxic, argumentative, and basically attempt to push others out of the sub for being too “lib fem” or liking something they deem to be toxic as a blanket thing (short men/gaming/anime/anal sex are three examples I’ve see). Whether or not these things are grave sins is entirely beside the point; the point i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/20 08:01 AM |
| 58 | “My boyfriend (28M) might be setting me (19F) up to be used sexually by his friends or strangers for some fetish.” Decade older bf grooms his teenage gf to satisfy his rape fetish.I’m glad most of the comments are telling her to cut and run, but I find it problematic that even a small percentage of them are saying “talk to him and tell him not to do it” as an option... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/20 08:10 PM |
| 8 | Need advice on whether I should break things up or talk it out with with himNeed advice on whether I should break things up or talk it out with with him 99% of the time if you have to ask, the answer dump him. Sooooo I’ve been together with this guy for a year and it’s been hard 🙃. Relationships shouldn’t be hard. They are work, yes, but they shouldn’t be difficult. Most of the time we’re good but his social media habits issues comes up every now and then, and honestly it just gives me a lot of anxiety and doubt that I feel bad about my feelings most of the time. Take y… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 11:12 PM |
| 13 | Do you girls think its worth waiting for a guy that doesn’t quite make your physical standards but is working hard to improve and showing results?Don’t wait around. If you were me, I would accept the date with the guy since I like him otherwise and find his effort admirable. But I’m not putting all my eggs in that basket... keep it casual, keep dating other people, keep vetting him especially in regards to how he treats his effort to improve. The recommended vetting time period is upwards of 6 months; if he’s still dedicated to improving himself then odds are he’ll still be at it by that point, and if he’s dropped off of improving then he… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 10:05 PM |
| 5 | How do I get the guy I am dating to shave his beard?It could be a phase. My fiancé went through one too where he wanted to try growing his beard as long as he could, but got tired of it in a couple months and shaved it back down to the length that flatters him best. I’d start by being honest about not finding the beard attractive and asking if he plans to keep it. If he takes the feedback and shaves it off, great. If not, and he has no end date to his beard wearing, you’ll have to stoop to manipulating him into shaving it off, and idk if you want… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 06:50 PM |
| 76 | I can't even... (reposted thus because I didn't post the full Screenshot on accident)It’s a well documented and researched phenomenon that Internet pornography is linked to Ed. Men know too, that’s why they do No Nut November and there’s a No Fap sub. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 06:38 PM |
| 13 | I was gonna post this on a throwaway acct, but IDC I'm crying and I just want to stop feeling painNo, you did not sabatoge yourself. He is not the prize, you are. In the wake of a break up, take care of yourself get your head screwed on right. Highly recommend working on your diet and sleep schedule on your own. Good luck. I wrote in a separate comment with the red flags I saw in your OP, but really I want you to know that you cannot beat yourself up over this guy who disrespected your boundaries just because he was your first and seems pretty well off. Take care of yourself. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 06:33 PM |
| 82 | I was gonna post this on a throwaway acct, but IDC I'm crying and I just want to stop feeling painFds advice would be, stop sleeping with this man if he ain’t your partner. One week is not a long enough time to vet a guy and his intentions. Highly recommend not to sleep with someone who isn’t in a relationship with you. (You say you’re exclusive but no-strings-attached, so I’m taking it that you’re just fooling around and neither have stated an intention for being an actual relationship with a future.) We fairly quickly opened up about our past dating relationships and how it's hard to find … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 06:05 PM |
| 163 | I can't even... (reposted thus because I didn't post the full Screenshot on accident)“He’s broken down several times saying I should just leave him because of this.” Yeah, OP, listen to your boo. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 05:34 PM |
| 24 | Thought we could use some wholesome content; Man makes coffee for his wife every morning...”because that’s what husbands do”Cute. My fiancé has been doing this for me since we started working from home, and our friend does it for his wife even though she has to get ready for work two hours before he does. It’s such a sweet gesture. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 05:07 AM |
| 14 | What’s the consensus here on prenuptials???Prenup doesn’t automatically mean the person who makes the money keeps the money... I’ve known people to do prenups that dictate that a sahm and kids get more than the state would’ve allotted them otherwise. Especially in places that don’t have communal property laws. Prenups aren’t one size fit all; so at the very least I’d encourage everyone to look at what your local divorce laws are and if you would prefer something different and consider prenup accordingly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/06/20 05:08 PM |
| 20 | What’s the consensus here on prenuptials???Always acceptable. Used to work for a family law firm doing marketing so I did a lot of research and writing about why prenups are an absolute must if you have anything of value. Another benefit of doing prenups is that you can learn a lot about your and your partner’s priorities and how the align. If a prenup or the terms you want in the prenup are a deal breaker, then that’s a bullet dodged. I want one for myself because I own my own place and I have my benefits set up to go to my family and w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/06/20 04:43 PM |
| 6 | What is your ladies perception on guys/men liking other women's pictures on social media when you're in the "talking" stage aka not officially dating?I find it to be questionable when men are liking pictures (especially swimsuit ones) online... the main exception is profile picture changes, but consistently looking at Instagram models and liking their pictures? Not into that. Belies an underlying pornsickness. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 10:35 PM |
| 3 | Idk if I'm projecting past relationship issues onto the present or if I should take things slow with this guy?Yes! You are valuable, your kisses and your sexuality (however much of it you want to share with a partner) are valuable. Be 100% positive that you want to be with a person and they want to be with you, anything less is a disservice. Also, I just realized that you are like, brand spanking new to the sub, so congrats on finding your way here. And you probably did not know what I meant by “pick me” in my earlier post... Basically “pick me” is short hand for the type of woman who is completely ment… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 10:27 PM |
| 6 | Proof that FDS works , husband cheats wife with younger woman abandons her during her pregnancy , wife goes full FDS instead of cOmuNIcaTE and cOUnseLIng ,demands all and half of his paycheck , scrote regrets comes back begging .Here’s the basic reddiquette guide if you’d like to know more: https://www.reddithelp.com/en/categories/reddit-101/reddit-basics/reddiquette A lot of people don’t end up following it, but I personally always try to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 08:55 PM |
| 3 | Idk if I'm projecting past relationship issues onto the present or if I should take things slow with this guy?I just peeped your post history. 25F, 33M? Red flag! When I was 24/25 I made"friends" with one or two of these 30+ years old men, all they wanted to do was convince me to fuck them. They took their sweet time with the "friend" courtship (upwards of 6 months), trauma bonded over exes, was clear about pivoting away from sexual related things every time they came up... and then BAM dick pics and guilt trips about what I was even doing *talking* to them. I never spent time alone with them at their h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 08:19 PM |
| 3 | Idk if I'm projecting past relationship issues onto the present or if I should take things slow with this guy?I did a more detail analysis in the other comment i just posted, but just to address this: >and he is the one the keeps bringing up that he is scared to come off annoying lol. When I was younger I consistently attracted guys like this... comes with the territory of being young and none of us knowing what we're doing. However, I've come to regard this insecurity as a red flag. Guys who are this insecure tend to turn into the "Nice Guy" trope... the kind that changes his personality and comes off … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 08:09 PM |
| 5 | Idk if I'm projecting past relationship issues onto the present or if I should take things slow with this guy?Re: therapist - Good! I hope you're getting a lot of good out of it. Re: Pick me vibes - just the general anxiety about all of this is the biggest indicator, but here is my break down of your post from my point of view. I say this with love and the knowledge that I've been in your situation a time or two. My previous post was my knee jerk reaction, but here's my detailed thoughts: >Sometimes I think he likes me and could possibly fall for me if I stick around. Sometimes I think he is playing gam… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 07:59 PM |
| 12 | Idk if I'm projecting past relationship issues onto the present or if I should take things slow with this guy?Before even reading the post: 1) if you think you’re projecting past relationship issues on to the present, please seek a therapist for a check in with your emotions. 2) yes you should take it slow. Always take it slow. 3) read the fds handbook in the “about” section of the sub. After reading the first half: You are not ready to date. You are giving off clear pick me vibes to this guy and he is living for it. After reading the second half: Stop worrying about being annoying. Constantly wondering… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 07:19 PM |
| 27 | Proof that FDS works , husband cheats wife with younger woman abandons her during her pregnancy , wife goes full FDS instead of cOmuNIcaTE and cOUnseLIng ,demands all and half of his paycheck , scrote regrets comes back begging .You’re not supposed to upvote/downvote content based on your agreement/approval. You’re supposed to upvote content you want people to see/comment on. It’s a bit of reddit etiquette that’s often forgotten because usually those come hand in hand, but situations like this you want the asshole to be highly upvoted so more people can see it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/20 01:00 AM |
| 20 | Male Audacity or am I being rude?Honestly I think he’s asking a reasonable question (as long as his text was as straightforward how you told us and not worded in a weird backhanded way), but I also don’t think you’re being rude. Just either ghost him or say, you’re right, let’s call it a day. And don’t respond to him anymore. (Fds handbook would probably say just ghost, but considering he’s a set up from a friend I think it would be socially appropriate to tell him you’re not feeling it, since he asked you directly.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/20 04:53 PM |
| 5 | Need advice on gift givingIf he “forgets” to give you a birthday present, do you even want to be with this guy by the time Father’s Day rolls around? As for what to actually gift on Father’s Day.... for my family, Father’s Day and Mother’s Day is a big deal so I understand. My closet aunties or uncles get little tokens of appreciation (a call or a card) and my parents at max get a 50 dollar utility gift (my dad this year is getting a jacket) and me coming over for the day on my best behavior. My sister buys her mom frien… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/20 03:49 PM |
| 32 | Is it a red flag that my boyfriend is against pedophiles being killed???He didn’t say he is against the death penalty, he said against the murder and torture of people in general. (So I can’t comment on the death penalty part.) I’m personally with him on this... lynching says way more about the person doing the lynching than the person being lynched. As a future judge and lawyer, I would hope he is against extra-judicial lynching, because it’s against the very foundation of even having a judicial system (even if the judicial system is flawed and ends up with pedophi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/20 03:16 PM |
| 23 | I love my boyfriend so much but he has never been in a good financial position and it's taking it's toll.Love is great. Love with a good man is great. But love in and of itself cannot sustain a relationship and cannot sustain a life together. You sound young; if you’re both in your early 20s, debt and finding out where you want to be in life isn’t bad, but if it’s hindering your relationship you’re doing a good thing by reevaluating the future you see with him. You might miss him, but you can’t shackle your future for love. If you do break up with him, I would suggest being intentionally single for… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/20 02:26 PM |
| 9 | Do I have to be a ice queen to be a HVW? I wear my heart on my sleeve but I have boundaries. What do you think?You don’t have to be an ice queen. Just don’t give your attention and affection to people who don’t deserve it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/20 04:18 PM |
| 49 | Shut the F*** UpI’ve never had a man tell me to shut up (let alone to shut the fuck up) and I’d never say that to anyone else. I’d be extremely hurt if my partner did that, and I don’t think I’d be able to get past the level of disrespect. Deal breaker levels of disrespect. Dump on the spot after five years together levels. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/20 05:11 PM |
| 3 | F 21- what do I do now???Good on you for saying no. Tell him if you want, but you‘ll look desperate and give him more surety that he can screw around with your head some more. You should work on yourself and look for a guy who actually gives a shit about you. This is assuming that your “friend” is the one you’ve been posting about consistently on this account. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/20 03:08 PM |
| 11 | Why are Robert Greene's books popular with mgtows?I think “discussion” would be a better flair than things scrotes say. I haven’t read his books. Would you recommend? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/20 02:58 PM |
| 4 | No does NOT mean try again later!Haha. I got a text three years later. Actually, this happened twice with two different dudes. They just popped in like, hey remember me from tinder? Yeah I do. I distinctly remember telling you to fuck off. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/20 09:55 AM |
| 3 | Dealing with someone with no car?Idk I think the not local and keeping car in hometown is kind of stringent. Keeping a non operating vehicle in hometown just because for your four years in college or whatever is going on is not financially prudent, in my opinion. I’m biased because I’m taking care of my brothers car while he’s in New York for grad school and by the time he graduates he is considering buying a new car anyway, so why keep this old one that is depreciating half it’s value every year. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/05/20 07:33 PM |
| 15 | I love how scrotes will call any woman that disagrees with them “triggered” while they’re the ones behind their computers bursting a vein while angrily reflecting their hatred onto other people lmfao.No self awareness. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/20 03:02 AM |
| 8 | Same girl asking when to send nudes. I cannot make this up 🤡🤦🏻♀️While I think the ring thing is a bit excessive, I agree with the spirit of only being exclusive with someone you intend to be with for the rest of forever. I don't see a point in having a casual boyfriend and being exclusive with him if its "just for now," or being exclusive with someone who doesn't feel the same about you. I'd like a strategist to chime in tho. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/20 12:23 AM |
| 3 | Same girl asking when to send nudes. I cannot make this up 🤡🤦🏻♀️I believe it’s in the handbook. I remember early on this sub often preached no exclusivity until there’s a ring in the picture. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 10:19 PM |
| 36 | Same girl asking when to send nudes. I cannot make this up 🤡🤦🏻♀️OP’s ldr: 🚩 🚩🚩🇦🇱🇨🇳🇩🇰🇭🇰🇮🇲🇰🇬🇱🇻🇲🇦🇲🇪🇳🇴🇧🇭🚩🚩🚩 OP: “there are no red flags“ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 10:13 PM |
| 57 | LVM can't be changed. Please just stop having kids with them. Sincerely: an lvm's daughterIt’s rather sad that the reason she’s moving out is because he kicked her out... op is proud of her sister for finding the strength to move on, but the poor woman is only moving on because her ex is forcing her to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 07:21 PM |
| 6 | Dad is triggered by his daughter expecting her boyfriend to pay for everything and fights with his wife about it. Because men always will sympathize with other men trying to get laid FIRST and not for the well being of their own flesh and blood.Good for daughter. Hope she keeps her standards high despite this asshole father. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 05:14 PM |
| 47 | Do I even need to say it? 😒I don’t like this implication of Patrick sexually assaulting Squidward. Can someone please pass the brain bleach. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 05:10 PM |
| 2 | A recent hook-up asked me my body count.Lol maybe I feel like it is a guideline in the handbook because it's been posted all the damn time. One of these posts I just linked should definitely be linked in the handbook. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 10:28 PM |
| 1 | How men rationalize their attraction to 15 year oldsThe second link in my comment is in the “Carroll wasn’t a pedo” camp, but when addressing the marriage proposal rumor theorizes that the rumor stemmed from him asking for Alice’s older sister’s hand... because she was 14 years old, which was marriageable age then. Not much better lol. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 06:53 PM |
| 12 | For those who know naruto: here is the pickmeisha anime queenI stopped reading/watching forever ago, sometime soon after the time skip to shippuden. I always thought the most logical and satisfying romantic arc between the main three would be Naruto and Sakura growing closer in Sasuke’s absence and getting together, with him being the main character and all... he had a shallow crush on her originally, but eventually came to know her as a person. By design of the show he was growing more mature, so his trajectory was to become an ideal man, in which case h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 04:54 PM |
| 9 | The AUDACITY!! Anyone else from that sub remember this post? It haunts me, like WTFThey’re not actually his kids. According to him they are hers from a previous relationship.(edit: okay, so I double checked and one is hers and the other is his, both from previous relationships. ) So lucky for her she can make a clean break. What’s most hilarious about the proposal is that in his comments on the update he keeps insisting that he was “only doing what reddit told me to do!” And everyone kept calling bullshit and running the original post through removedit to prove that literally … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 04:10 PM |
| 52 | The AUDACITY!! Anyone else from that sub remember this post? It haunts me, like WTFAm I the asshole for not wanting to go out because my girlfriends cooking is so much better and cheaper than eating out? And the update. It’s a doozy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 03:39 AM |
| 94 | The AUDACITY!! Anyone else from that sub remember this post? It haunts me, like WTFNoooo! She wasn’t even his wife, just his girlfriend! And then after she found out about the post he decided to take her out for a dinner one time and decided it was good enough to propose to her! That poor woman!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 02:22 AM |
| 411 | The AUDACITY!! Anyone else from that sub remember this post? It haunts me, like WTFHaha yes I remember. Didn’t this thread win best food related asshole thread in the year end awards? “Let’s unpack this shitcase” is still among my favorite phrases and I can’t wait to have an opportunity to use it. This lasagna guy was the worst. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 09:42 PM |
| 7 | How men rationalize their attraction to 15 year olds(Sorry, I’m the type of literature major who is interested in this kind of history so wanted to add on and clarify your account.) Fact: Lewis Carroll has a strange friendship with children, specifically Alice Liddell, for whom he would make up the stories that would later become Alice in wonderland. At some point the liddells cut him out of their life. Rumor: he pitched marriage to Alice to her parents. May or may not be true. Most historians agree that the evidence around Carroll’s possible ped… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 08:01 PM |
| 7 | A recent hook-up asked me my body count.I don’t know exactly what link it’s under, but I know it’s in there! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 05:36 PM |
| 41 | A recent hook-up asked me my body count.I could've sworn there was a whole article in the handbook about it, but it must be buried in one of the articles. That said, read the handbook. NEVER tell a man your N-count, and if he even asks that's red flag. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 04:39 PM |
| 4 | I donated $1. Not a lot because I am broke...but if you can, please sign. Donation not necessary!! As it just goes to promoting the petition.In case you're like me and want to know everything about any cause you're considering donating to, here is the website of Exodus Cry, the 501C(3) non profit that is hosting this campaign: https://exoduscry.com/ The change.org petition and traffickinghub.com website doesn't (imo) adequately explain what donations will go to--whether they will be used just to fund the trafficking hub campaign or if they will be donations to the Exodus Cry--but exodus cry's web page on donations does a little bit b… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 04:10 PM |
| 25 | Trying to understand my resistance in this relationship.I stopped reading after “life coach.” No to that shit. Life coach is a joke career. There’s no industry regulation (if you could even call life coaching an industry) and every life coach I’ve ever known (and I used to do the self-help seminar circuit, and so I’ve known quite a few) was lying to themselves and/or everyone else about their success. To me, this is a red flag. Anyway, trust your intuition. If you’re not feeling the relationship, don’t push it just because you think he’s a catch. Rem… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 07:11 AM |
| 11 | I love my fiancé, but I could do without himI mean, it depends on what you mean when you're talking about what you expect in a partner, right? For us, what we mutually expect for in our partnership is to respect each other and work together against our problems. (All my deal breakers are things like him becoming an alcholic or drug addict, if he ever became a sloth stay-at-home boyfriend who lives off government checks, or if he gained a hundred pounds. Basically all things that would require him to have a drastic change in personality to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 12:37 AM |
| 16 | Doesn’t it feel like a woman have to choose between a Homer Simpson and Ned Flanders?The two most considerate and demonstratively high value men I’ve ever known were religious. One is Buddhist, and the other a Presbyterian. So I see your point, there may be a really high correlation there. Certain religions that are more about being lovely to every being and creature. I think in the secular world there’s a lot of incentive to get as hedonist as possible because nothing matters. But I’ve also met a decent amount of good men (I don’t know them well enough to call them all HVM) tha… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 11:33 PM |
| 10 | How should an HVM react when you make mistakes?To answer your actual question though... How do you think will an HVM react on things like this? If he triggered something traumatic for you, he needs to use his Big Boy words to figure out what he did to trigger your fears and he will both support you through your healing process and adjust his own behavior to earn your confidence; alternatively, part ways. Stonewalling you is an abusive, gaslighting tactic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 10:24 PM |
| 5 | How should an HVM react when you make mistakes?Dump him. Work on yourself. This is no HVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 10:18 PM |
| 22 | Ok Ladies I need some advice for my "situationship"I know this will be asked... did i ever have a talk with him? Lol girl, we’re not going to ask that. That is a question that would be asked and pushed for in every other sub but this one. You don’t have the talk with him, he has the talk with you. If he doesn’t put a name on it, you guys ain’t a thing. You owe him nothing. Nothing. Block his number and never think of him again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 10:09 PM |
| 14 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Advertised to Girls as “Strong and Empowering” instead of “Risky and Reckless”?I see a lot of people, mostly women, who “try” casual sex, and a majority of the time they find out after trial and error that it’s not worth shit. I’m one of those; after sleeping with strangers, then sleeping with friends, then sleeping with the one trusted friend, I came to the conclusion that one-night stands are never worth it, and long term arrangements are rarely worth it. Even with my one trusted friend, In retrospect I question if getting my rocks off was worth the hassle. Sure it was f… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 05:13 PM |
| 27 | I saw the post about “begging for a pandora CZ ring” and decided to look up that exact same ring. Sadly it’s not a joke 😥The one on the right needs her ring resized... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 04:44 PM |
| 13 | Do HVM ever mention their ex ?As a passing comment like this, not a big deal. His ex is part of his history, especially in relation to agreeing with you on the difficulty of learning French. Talking about past experiences can be healthy as long as you aren’t living in the past. Unhealthy is comparing you to an ex or comparing your current relationship to that with an ex, even if it’s in a positive way. Of note though: if anything, I’ve been the dumbass... Don’t put yourself down like this. You’re not a dumbass; you’re workin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 04:41 PM |
| 20 | What’s your opinion on flirtatious teasing?Teasing someone about being a dork is fine if! You already own your dorkiness and the other person likes that about you. The jokingly asking you to pay for drinks sounds like a plausible deniability joke... of you’re offended, of course it’s a joke! But if you’re down, let’s do it ;) That said, 37 after a 26 yo and drinks date? No thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 03:13 PM |
| 39 | I saw this in another group, would you consider this a LVM? Or it’s not his fault?He’s 34 though. Most of the men I know quickly get their shit together so it’s manageable either in college or as they start their careers. The fact that only a few months ago his mom is still using his credit to ruin him is a red flag of no boundaries with mom and a poor understanding of finances. The mere fact that his girlfriend is posting this instead of him screams low value to me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 06:17 PM |
| 67 | I saw this in another group, would you consider this a LVM? Or it’s not his fault?Bad finances is low value. Seems like a pushover for his mom, who has apparently been ruining his credit for over a decade and he did nothing to set boundaries about it. Doesn’t mean he can’t be a caring person, but he will make a difficult partner because if the finance issue and the mom issue. So I’d say LVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 06:14 PM |
| 4 | DATE PARTNERS, NOT PROJECTS 👏🏻Hahaha that’s adorable! 😍 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/20 09:13 PM |
| 47 | You are a woman, sureRight?? At last olympics when someone set a new world record for fastest time in women’s swimming, all these guys were like “it’s not a world record!! She didn’t beat Michael Phelps!!” They do it all. The. Time. Even though that Olympian for sure would swim laps around them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/20 05:37 PM |
| 36 | Ugh. And some people really believe this is okay.My fiancé likes to say that our relationship isn’t hard work. By that he means that it is work, but it’s work that he’s happy to do, so it’s never hard. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/05/20 10:15 PM |
| 8 | The guy didn’t confirm the date. So I didn’t meet up. What’s your policy on this?Yes, it’s part of his courtship. Men Appreciate more what they work harder to get (a woman’s attention.) React accordingly. If you’re interested, be interested in continuing the conversation when he does text, but don’t text first. This case is clear cut though. Man should be bringing his a game, which includes clear communication and taking care of the details. She shouldn’t have to ask. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/05/20 06:25 PM |
| 30 | Hope she gets pickedAnd then in the RTs she tells men to keep being romantic, despite just validating why they shouldn’t... ?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/05/20 06:02 PM |
| 12 | The guy didn’t confirm the date. So I didn’t meet up. What’s your policy on this?Read the hand book. Never text first. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/05/20 05:56 PM |
| 114 | HVM remodeling his sister’s room. Proof men are capable of doing great things for women in their life.Prime example of HVM not necessarily needing to be rich to be of High Value. This is clearly a third world country, but uses what he has and is great at it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/05/20 04:39 PM |
| 14 | My ex from three years ago wants to get back together and he mentioned getting marriedIf you’re not sure about him, don’t get back together with him. You want to focus on yourself and be single? Focus on yourself and be single. If he doesn’t meet your standards, do not lower them. It’s not disrespectful to say you don’t think you are meant to be a couple. It’s more disrespectful to both yourself and him to get together if you are less than 10000% excited about it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 11:53 PM |
| 49 | Will a Man Ever Keep A HVW As a FWB?Men will not commit to you because they are LVM. This says more about them than of you. Keep your standards high. LVM will keep a woman as an fwb as much as they can, low or high value. They will keep you as an fwb as long as accept that treatment. That said, sometimes you know an HVM but you’re just not compatible as a relationship. I was FWB with a HVM... and when I say fwb I say that we were friends for years and didn’t see each other as romantic prospects. (Fwb is not and never should be a s… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 11:29 PM |
| 3 | “Exclusive” is the biggest scam of our dating world today - women who aren’t sold on total FDS, please at least consider this standardThis quote in the article says it all: Sexologist Emily Morse, Ph.D., host of the “Sex with Emily” show: “Sexclusivity does not always equal exclusivity,” she says. “If the condom issue helps spark a dialogue, that’s a great starting point. But I would caution women against leaving it at that.” In today’s super-casual dating culture, Morse says a promise of sexual exclusivity may be more of a placeholder than a long-term commitment. “‘We’re only sleeping with each other’ can have a whispered sub… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 09:45 PM |
| 44 | Call her daddyI listened to ten minutes of it. I found their voices grating (and I grew up speaking LA valley girl dialect) and was rather bothered by how they were trying to be super edgy... those ten minutes was an opening monologue about one of them accidentally bringing a sex toy in her purse with her and having it fall out at brunch with a friend. But there was no punch line. It ain’t cute to bring your unwashed vibrator to lunch, girl. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 09:35 PM |
| 28 | “Before sex, a man isn’t thinking clearly but a woman is. After sex, a man IS thinking clearly but a woman isn’t” : Post-Nut ClarityScientifically proven that men view sex as an end goal and therefore lose interest after it, while women view sex as connection and therefore at the point of sex women are likely either are or will become more attached. Not just scientifically, that idea is abound in media, even pick me rom coms. I listened to a scientist/relationship expert who studies relationships talk about this on a podcast once and she was talking about how she would advise men to wait until they’re committed to their part… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 08:17 PM |
| 75 | "FDS isn't a good dating advice". Any thoughts about this post and its opinion about the FDS ?They never see any success stories? Has this person not seen the fds success tag? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 07:03 PM |
| 3 | Does making the first move on a guy or asking him out (not for sex) a pickme move?Don’t put your cards down on the table. At most, fan your cards flirtily, allowing him a mere glimpse of what you have in your hand. If he’s interested in what you’ve got, he’ll raise his bet. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 06:57 PM |
| 3 | “Exclusive” is the biggest scam of our dating world today - women who aren’t sold on total FDS, please at least consider this standardExclusive as in not going on dates with anyone else. Also see “I don’t like labels.” Committed as in planning long term to move in together, meet each other’s families, etc. so basically you can be exclusive, have someone you know for sure will hang out with you, and not committed, not deal with all the other complications that a relationship entails. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 03:43 PM |
| 21 | Ladies, if he’s interested, you’ll know. I also love that she didn’t compromise her standards.Similar story. My fiancé was an alcoholic when we met. Drank to get drunk every day, came to class hung over. He quit drinking cold turkey on his birthday that year, and then we got together a couple weeks later. I am very proud of him for quitting, but i didn’t know until a year so later that he quit drinking because he wanted to be a good partner for me before he even asked me out. I found it so commendable that it wasn’t even something I asked him to do and he never would have said anything t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 03:33 PM |
| 1 | what's the best way to cut someone off?Block him and delete his contact. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 03:28 PM |
| 3 | Is this a red flag if the guy doesn’t have a lot of relationship experience ?You’re still young, and I think it’s a green flag that he disclosed because he’s worried about the statistic he heard. It shows that he cares about this relationship being successful and wants to be upfront about that. Like others said, I think it’s good that he hasn’t drawn out other relationships in the past. It might also be a good thing that this is his first serious relationship experience at an age where he’s much more mature than at 16. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/20 03:27 PM |
| 7 | HOW TO DEAL WITH A LVM DADHere’s a step by step guide I found on preparing to leave an abusive home. https://emotionalabuseawareness.tumblr.com/post/101803771347/leaving-an-abusive-home Good luck. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/20 06:06 PM |
| 21 | HOW TO DEAL WITH A LVM DADLow value? More like Negative Value. I’m sorry that you’re experiencing this. Are you living on your own? Are you in a position to cut off all contact with him? If not, start preparing to. Get an exit strategy together. Focus on yourself first and foremost. I know you want to help your mom, but you can’t help her if you can’t help yourself first. You’ll need therapy. If you are still in university, check if your counselors are doing remote meetings. If you have insurance, look up if your provide… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/20 04:50 PM |
| 16 | How do you feel about sex dolls?I remember years ago reading an article about this robotic sex doll on display at this robotics convention or something like that. The doll was absolutely destroyed by the convention goers. The guy who made it was absolutely heartbroken because (in a kind of twisted way) she was kind of like a daughter to him (not an incest way, but the fact that he put his hear and soul into her). The whole thing terrified me on multiple levels. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 10:52 PM |
| 1 | Words of wisdomThis play sounds amazing. What’s it called? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 09:34 PM |
| 88 | A man saying 'we' are pregnant when it's the mother-to-be that goes through the hell alone.I just don’t get the logic. Being pregnant means carrying a child. Are you carrying in your body? No? Then you are not pregnant!! Just be a normal person and say, “My partner is pregnant, we are having a baby.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 08:44 PM |
| 42 | I honestly don’t know how to handle thisIf you have his license plate number, try calling the non emergency line of your local police station to report. Unfortunately doesn’t seem like there’s anything else you can do. I know it’s really upsetting to see that kind of thing so I hope you’re feeling okay. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 07:17 PM |
| 31 | Watch how he ‘play fights’ with you, I just saw this tweet where the guy is extremely violent while ‘playing’This is upsetting to watch. I’ve seen couples rough house in the pool, but usually the guy would just drop her gently or even let her dunk him in the water. For sure I’ve never seen anyone shove their SOs face in the water, let alone multiple times in a row. :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 07:13 PM |
| 8 | Uh... What?This is green flag behavior. Just based on this interaction, it looks like he’s not trying to pressure you into meeting him so he can give you the gift, he’s not forcing his choice of gift on you or else, and he appears to genuinely be trying to help and woo you. Men can be manipulative jerks, but low value men will not do this type of thing. High value men will understand that gift giving is not transactional and will not expect that you “owe” him anything for his act. A negative value man migh… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 06:57 PM |
| 18 | Used to be Pickmeisha... how do I level-up while being engaged?From your description of yourself, you sound like a high value woman but with imposter syndrome due to your past experiences. Are you in a position to get therapy? Finding one that works with you can help you unpack your feelings of inadequacy. In the mean time, if you’re looking for friends and connection, a new hobby might help. There are websites like meetup.com where you can find activity groups. In the past I found a marathon team, speaking club, and even trivia nights through those kind of… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 06:44 PM |
| 1 | In your experience, have most guys just been interested in your looks?If you check in with r askmen about dating, they’ll tell you that looks are what attracts them for short term and personality attracts them for long term. LVM dating strategy is to have sex with someone attractive, then if they like her personality they’ll go for a relationship. So yes, looks matter and it’s more rare that they get down to caring about personality. That said, men are not actually as picky as they say they are, because women on average are more attractive than men. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 05:39 PM |
| 2 | Almost HVM exI agree. OP sounds like two years ago she was still a pick me and invited his friends hoping that he’d come, and at the time felt miffed that he came to see his friends and didn’t spend time with her. That whole part of the post sounds like she still wrestling with her past pick me behavior. OP, I think you should be careful and keep checking in with yourself. Examine if you are feeling insecure because of pickmeitis or if there’s really something to be concerned about. If you really think he’s … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 05:27 PM |
| 14 | Women as the sole providers?I’m neither because in this day and age and where I live, it’s near impossible for more than one person to make it on a single income. That said, one of FDS’s main points of ideology is that HVM want to care for and provide. How’s he going to do that if he’s broke and makes no money? I suppose it would be a different situation if you have kids and he quits to care for them full time, but if he’s a career failure and a mooch, that’s Low Value. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/20 04:15 PM |
| 13 | Saw this on my feed and just thought 'Wow'. Imagine being with someone so supportive and loving over a drawing of a flower (hes consistently like this) I can't at the moment, sadly, but hopefully I will soon.What sets this post aside from fake sounding praise or flattery for the sake of it is that he actually engages with what content of his flattery is. It’s not just a hollow “look how good she is!” It actually is a bit more like, “I’ve actually thought critically about how this is good.” As an artist, that kind of feedback is food for the soul. And of course he’s posting about her, If I was married to an award winning landscape photographer and artist who is this skilled even when rusty, I sure as… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/20 11:28 PM |
| 47 | Things seem to be taking a negative turn here. Please, let's focus our energies on building each other up and IGNORING trash men.If you want to share the gross dms, that’s what r/fdssuperfans is for! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/20 07:31 PM |
| 11 | Ladies, what does FDS think of men who are into gaming?For most members of this sub, it’s a no go. For a smaller group of people on this sub, gaming is fine if it’s not impacting your relationship. One of the biggest issues with games (in terms of how they impact relationships)is that they by nature are a huge time and money investment. The main game systems go for about 400, and the major games everybody talks about cost about 70. Of course if you’re spending 400 for the system, you’re not going to buy just one game. And if you’re paying for a syst… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/20 06:21 PM |
| 13 | Run as fast as I can or stay??Odds are he’s trying to follow that age old saying: the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. For me it’s a yellow flag, maybe two yellow flags. Pay most attention to how much attention he pays you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/20 04:08 AM |
| 4 | Is it a bad idea to send your long term partner sexy videos and pictures?I’m not a big fan of web sex because anything can get hacked, but doing a sexy video chat is far better than photos or videos if you want to have long distance sexy time with your partner. Two way interaction. Less chance of something saved to get shared or hacked later on down the line. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/20 06:19 PM |
| 20 | Cleaning inspo videos are toxic. They normalize women cleaning up after their slob kid's and husband's messes.Unrelated to the main topic for discussion, but Even toddlers can be trained to put away things, to be helpful. They aren't actually helpful but it's good training for them to learn self-discipline. Haha this is so true. I babysat kids once whose parents taught them that their toys needed to go to sleep when they were done playing, but then they’d put them in random places (dollies in the crayons, teddy bears in the coat closet) and be upset when they couldn’t find them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/20 02:00 AM |
| 27 | A cautionary tale about the dangers of settling for a LVMI saw his update and it sounds like this is a white man/Asian woman relationship; for some reason he married her and expects her to cook all the time even though he doesn’t particularly like her cousine. Hmmm. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/20 12:16 AM |
| 21 | Somethigs I hateI was once having a conversation with a man who had really nice skin and he said “you’re going to think this is gay, but honestly I got really hooked on this Korean skin care stuff my ex left behind.” I just stared at him blankly because if he hadn’t said that, I’d be slightly impressed. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/20 12:15 AM |
| 10 | Man gets mad that wife has the AUDACITY to sign her OWN name on lunch notes to his daughter instead of HIS.Yeah that sucks. I’ve seen a few stories where good step parents leave toxic ex and are torn because they feel like they’re abandoning the kid. This sounds like that kind of situation. :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 10:45 PM |
| 27 | Man gets mad that wife has the AUDACITY to sign her OWN name on lunch notes to his daughter instead of HIS.Even if bio mom made the discovery, it doesn’t excuse this: He is quite upset with me “crossing boundaries” and “alienating” him from his child by putting my name on the notes instead of his. And he feels that I should at the very least put “love Dad and Jane” but that the correct way would be for me to have been signing “Love, Dad.” As he believed I had been doing all along. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 03:57 PM |
| 11 | Man gets mad that wife has the AUDACITY to sign her OWN name on lunch notes to his daughter instead of HIS.As far as I know, kindergarten starts at 6yo? (My parents put me in a prekindergarten class called Early 5 because I was 5 yo and wasn’t old enough for kindergarten, so...). Still bothered by the age gap, but I don’t think it’s implied it’s been that much longer. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 03:45 PM |
| 113 | Man gets mad that wife has the AUDACITY to sign her OWN name on lunch notes to his daughter instead of HIS.Wife makes lunch for stepdaughter every day and writes a cute note to put in there. Only recently did her husband take a look at the notes and is now pissed that she had the audacity to sign it “Love Jane” instead of “Love Dad and Jane” or his preferred “Love Dad.” Despite having never packed a lunch for his daughter in his life! Scope the age gap too: 28F/35M, married for 6 years. Which means she was 22 marrying a 29 yo man. :/ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 03:04 PM |
| 5 | Is jealousy a pickme trait?Same. Jealousy is exhausting. I’ve never been jealous in a relationship, but I’ve watched other people be jealous, and almost every time when I see women jealous it’s because the man is out there throwing around red flags by either being overly friendly with other women or puts her down in favor of other women, and when I see men jealous it’s because he’s this guy projecting his red flags on to his partner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/20 06:48 PM |
| 3 | How to make High Value friendsMy HV friends I made either in my marketing courses at community college or at work, where I have a healthy work-social environment. My core group of friends is that previous group; we met through a professional development club (ie, we were all working on sharpening our skills) and bonded over late nights working on our extra curricular project (ie, we bonded over activities that proved how much weight we would pull, and how well we worked together.) There were plenty of other people that came … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/20 05:11 PM |
| 14 | Just another reason NOT to do hookups! Men knowingly hiding their STI’s and infect their sexual partners! 🤮Like juggling. Imagine this only the plates are women they keep spinning to keep them around. It’s red pill terminology. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/05/20 07:21 AM |
| 3 | Need Advice Please ++You are not crazy. Trust your own judgement. Even if they are just friends (sounds like an emotional affair to me, at the very least), the fact that he continues to disregard your comfort with this speaks volumes. Good riddance. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/20 10:36 PM |
| 2 | Sending nudes is a terrible ideaHvm would not require, ask for, or even desire nudes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/20 07:28 PM |
| 1 | Would you date white guy who used to teach English in Asia ?My brother taught in Vietnam the year after we finished college (we’re of Vietnamese descent, so part of him going and me visiting him there was to get in touch with our roots), so when I visited I met many of his English teaching colleagues who fell into two groups: the ones who were weird and fetishist and spent all their weekends hitting the bars and spending money on the hostesses. The non problematic colleagues were chill and mostly kept dating (if they dated, a couple of them didnt) within… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/04/20 08:33 PM |
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter