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flandersmustash Archive

View 1 posts and 90 comments by flandersmustash on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

He divorced me on account I couldn’t have sex after childbirth for 3 months. He was abusive so he did me a favour. I raise my child alone as he also fucked off completely. He sees our child a couple times a year if he can “arrange his work load”. But it’s for the best. Honestly it was incredibly hard at the beginning. Parenting through heartbreak was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It took a long time for me to actually face reality, he had abused me, abused our child, walked out and told me i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 10:55 AM
2

You’ve clearly done some work on yourself otherwise you wouldn’t have those lovely things to say about yourself! A single mum of 3 you are an inspiration to so many of us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 09:58 PM
2

I think you’re selling yourself short, and shouldn’t be analysing a man’s opinion of you. You are confident in who you are but it looks like you don’t want to seem boastful to men. He validates nothing in you. In essence especially when getting to know someone, they’re going to try compliment you. If you believe it’s true then it just aligns with what you already know and you can thank them for noticing. If you want to downplay it because you feel insecure in owning your positive traits, it beco…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 05:22 AM
4

tinder translators is great
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 04:22 PM
9

That doesn’t mean the same will happen to your children. I am mixed race and my mum was often confused for a nanny. My child is also mixed and looks unlike me and has a different surname, times are different now. I go out with my friends children who’s race Incould never produce and people will still assume I am their mum. This isn’t about your kids. This is about you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 03:15 PM
13

It’s your name. Airport troubles aren’t a reason to change it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 03:10 PM
18

MANY. I’ve probably done every pick me ever. But one that still gives me embarrassment is I gave him my card to pay for dinner, clothes whatever so he could look like he was paying. He told me he felt emasculated that he couldn’t pay for things and apparently that was my problem to fix? Dear Jesus. What was wrong with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 09:08 AM
1

I hope so! I hope these are real stories too, as I’ve never heard anyone say this in real life. But I guess there’s hope?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 05:37 PM
2

Actually yes I agree with you on the tampons. I think it was knee jerk to men “helping” when what’s (mostly here) being described is personal responsibilities.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 05:24 PM
24

They shouldn’t be thought of as “helping” they are being responsible adults, taking care of the things they should do. It’s not a woman’s job. You’re not helping her. That said the examples are good. I’d love to hear a man tell another man that rather than praise his bare minimum efforts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 03:20 PM
2

The last updated paragraph I’ve never had someone else explain, and it is exactly my defence too. Inherently saw that masculine was superior so tried to shed any ounce of femininity because it appeared to me that men thought this was lesser and less intelligent. I still actually struggle with this truthfully. Every single one of us has masculine and feminine sides. Do you have female friends? That aided me massively in getting back in touch. I spent more and more time with them until they became…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/20 08:13 AM
1

I have very stereotypically male interests too! But this is society telling you these interests are male. But They are just interests. Society gendered them. I was a massive tomboy too, and my dress sense is very androgynous as opposed to masculine or feminine but I sacrificed some time and taught myself some basic make up to enhance tthat side of me too. And I’m still not interested in it but I have a 5 minute routine which I’ve now perfected and look great because of it. The moment someone men…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/20 07:34 AM
1

It’s difficult because misogyny is so deeply ingrained in our culture. Women are just second class. Why would menstruation be important to anyone. I wasn’t allowed to burn incense or burn artefacts for my passed grandmother because I was on my period and hence “unclean”. I have to bite my tongue a lot to feel a part of my race and culture.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/20 07:24 AM
12

Yep, guy disliked my opinion. Then decided I must be ugly because I had that opinion and came for my physical appearance as if he has even seen me. Was hilarious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/20 07:20 AM
8

Honestly I had never noticed until I started dating in my thirties after my divorce, and what they perpetuated vs what the reality for me, were absolute worlds apart. At 32 and single mum, and what a lot of men say they shit on was the complete opposite. I attracted young men, and couldn’t keep up with how many were trying it on with me. I felt like I was prepared to have no dates and be really far between, but I had more attention than I’ve ever had. Takeaway is: men are full of shit opinions. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/20 07:18 AM
3

I realised this too late and now deal exactly with the issue of the child being expected to meet his abusivr fathers wants and needs and being projected as and extension of him. I don’t know how to manage this going forwards. I hope someone has some advice how to navigate this situation that’s already occurred.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/20 10:30 AM
27

Yes!!! And being able to talk about it with other women is amazing because, one not all women have come to this conclusion yet, and two you can’t talk to men about this, because majority cannot accept a woman putting her needs before a mans. What men also don’t understand about this sub either is that we’re not some minority outskirts of women who’ve been hurt and BiTtEr. The me too movement showed this is not a minority. This is commonplace, we need solidarity in order to combat something which…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 05:21 PM
43

Highly agree, Id figured out new rules for myself dating this time round, and finding this sub was like someone had put it all into words for me. On top of that it is just women which means conversations for once from a female perspective without derailing constantly for hurt feelings or arguments of “but men”. It’s not new. The reading list shows it’s existed for ages. We need dating for women by women, rather than dictated by men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 05:00 PM
13

I am well aware. I’m not sure you’re in the right place if you don’t want to listen to any FDS advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 06:00 PM
48

You’ve spent a weekend together and told him you’re exclusive? Then telling him you’re going to date someone else? What are you doing? You shouldn’t be exclusive, long distance after 2 days of in person meeting and you certainly don’t owe him an explanation of who you are or aren’t dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 04:41 PM
4

Is this a religious thing? My ex husband didn’t go as far as throwing clothes out and replacing but he did HATE how i dressed and rather i be in floral dresses and high heels every day. He also despised me breastfeeding, he literally listed it as a reason for divorce. He is a pseudo conservative Christian who “saved himself for marriage”. Is it common in these kinds of men? It’s just abuse and control. But I dunno seeing similar behaviour I experienced under tthe guise of religion has kinda trig…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 04:37 PM
20

Local bartender living abroad is the biggest red flag, at least she came to her senses out there. Could have gone really differently.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 12:46 PM
9

Oh definitely, I don’t really disagree with you, i’ve looked those things up myself too. I’ve given my mum or friend a call to ask what to do. I wouldn’t want to really find out someone who’s incompetent with those tasks either. I just also know it’s of no consequence to how they treat you personally. I do agree with it they don’t do chores I wouldn’t date them. I’m not looking for another person to clean up after. I have a child I don’t want a grown man masquerading as one. I just meant over th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 12:28 PM
13

Some haven’t, some mums never did teach them and enabled them. And then some will hire a cleaner and continue to never learn. It is telling sure, but is also an opportunity to see how open someone is to learning, not mothered. My boyfriend admitted he never had a dishwasher before and had no idea what to do with my dishes and continued to hand wash them. I showed him once how to load it and never heard about it since, it’s just done. I had an abusive ex who was excellent at chores, not that he d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 08:40 AM
7

I just saw this and thought to comment lmao but decided not to lol. BASIC. BASIC. BASIC. And so many comments are like thank you!!! Really? Have a shower and brush your teeth? Drink water?! 😂😂😂😂😂😂 Lord wtaf
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 08:14 AM
9

Amen! You can’t go back or drop them because they WILL default to bare minimum if. you let them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/20 08:04 PM
33

Just btw Interests are a dime a dozen. Sense of humour also. Don’t worry those things are easily found again. I used to be all excited when a guy has the same interests and chemistry and realistically that’s all just nonsense compared to who he really is. he was nowhere near what you wanted. It’s find ing someone who doesn’t just treat you like shit that’s hard to find.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/20 08:32 PM
3

Basically my biggest mistake and thing i’d do differently was vet properly and choose a better man. This is why I sub here, and what I wish I knew back then. I would choose to have kids probably around the same time. I had become senior in my role and could comfortably start my own business. The thing that held me back was my choice in partner. I think personally I would look into work I could do from home and part time to ensure that even if i did spend most time at home I could still develop a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 07:48 PM
1

I explained majority of times but followed with a block so that they wouldn’t try and say anything back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 03:57 PM
3

I’m a single mum. I started a career in my early twenties that was one that could be done anywhere in the world, remotely, from home, part time and was in high demand. Not that I knew that when I chose it. It has meant I have never had to sacrifice my career once having my child, it just slowed down and i became self employed. I still run my own business and do all childcare work. If i were to have another baby with my boyfriend I would only take a couple months off, and then continue to work pa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 03:11 PM
18

Omg this explains so much. Lol all this time i’ve been thinking it’s so weird when I dated before I met my boyfriend, I was being so aloof and unresponsive and utterly confused how many men were dropping at my feet and begging to be exclusive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 09:26 AM
10

Agreed. I definitely ignored many red. flags through out the relationship but it went insane after I found out I was pregnant and subsequently childbirth. All those red flags became red fucking banners flying from aeroplanes and did I even dump him then?! Nope because he wanted me dependant. He could punish and scorn me for having a child that interfered with the world no longer revolving around him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 09:30 AM
3

Nope, because there is no “tactic” there’s no manipulation. It’s just rules to remind us of our worth and not to fall for red flags. There’s no need to tell anyone how you developed self worth, just demonstrate it :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 09:21 AM
1

This sounds so awful and I’m glad you can see it for what it is. He is abusive and controlling. You don’t deserve to be put into debt by anyone, you don’t deserve to be screamed at. Ive been there before where you just have no fight left, they try to provoke you and you give in and don’t bother to say anything. Sometimes they love it because it’s an instant win, sometimes they still want a reaction from you and say/do something worse. You deserve happiness and to be cherished and loved. Firstly …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 09:20 AM
8

I don’t really understand what this has to do with nicknames. You decided to use him for money because you used a nickname and felt redemption because he went back to the girl he dumped for you? Okay? None of this is queen shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 09:12 AM
7

I actually agree and I’m so. confused when someone says they have a FWB because what even is that??? Someone you’re just not committed to but you see for an extended period of time? I think i’ve even misunderstood why FDS was against this until I saw how many actually thought they were friends and then got emotionally involved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 11:08 PM
2

Sounds like bread crumbing. I see red flags from him dating so quickly and because your emotions are involved it could sway your actions and reality. I’d proceed with caution, leave your feelings for him and any perceived chemistry at home. Use the dinner to assess where he’s really at if you’re still going.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 09:46 PM
4

It’s a low form of manipulation. You didn’t do as he wanted so he will withdraw to punish you. He wants to feel wanted, and whatever it is that he disagrees with literally shattered part of his ego. He wants to regain this need to be desired by withdrawing completely in order for you to beg him to come back. Sad sad little men do this shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 09:34 PM
5

I don’t have direct advice for how to recover from that specific scenario just how to raise it in general. If you’re self esteem is fragile that a fuckboy can mess with it then you need to step away from dating. Get back to you, try something new, spend time in old hobbies, do something you feel improves your appearance but makes YOU feel great (e.g. i love having my nails done, I normally bite them, so they’re kinda ugly, so doing them makes me feel invincible). I’d also delete majority of soci…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 09:26 PM
18

If you weren’t interested in him shouldn’t have bothered. You weren’t being harsh. Whether he was firstly interested in you or not he’s proving he is not going to make effort. You were right. You’re not petty. You’re setting your standards from the very beginning, whatever you tolerate is how you teach people to treat you. Onwards and upwards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 09:13 PM
2

Report married men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 02:27 PM
25

I understand this but give yourself some time and don’t hate yourself if you ever feel like you want to change your mind, use FDS to help minimise risk of a bad relationship. I too have very little examples of good healthy relationships around me and i’m in my 30s. You’re young, enjoy the things you love with lesser responsibilities. I wish I did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 06:40 PM
2

Rereading them, i agree yep total bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:17 PM
6

Exactly this. They can’t help themselves though, I want to know who these magical men are who aren’t looking to fuck on the first date, like they all so proclaim. They just see she’s seeing through their shit and they don’t want more women to read it and start shutting their bare minimum efforts down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:15 PM
9

Haha I was the same! I think he dropped I love you around the 3-4 month mark but I never said it back until maybe 9 months in, when I genuinely believed I meant it. He appeared unphased that I didn’t reciprocate and seemed to appreciate we might not feel the same at the exact same time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 10:18 AM
8

It’s helped me grow in. confidence and I also see it work in friendships with men too. Setting clear boundaries they cannot cross means they treat me a lot better. I’ve also found I’m a lot less susceptible to bullshit and people twisting things to present it as my feelings as the problem rather than their action that created my feelings as the problem. I’m happy to take personal responsibility over myself, but I expect people in my world to do the same. My feelings are not irrational, or errati…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 10:15 AM
25

Started good but her responses are too catered to the men in their feelings. Why are all the top comments men attempting to take her points down, and also saying YES FOR FUCKBOYS BUT NOT ME IM SUCH A GOOD BOY. Lol. Not all men indeed. Sigh. So bored of their obvious predictable rhetoric.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 09:34 AM
6

Alotta words to say just not that into you. He‘ doesn’t sound intimidated he just sounds like he likes thats you’re available on tap whenever he chooses to give you attention. You don’t sound pathetic, you just sound as if you’re focussed your energy on someone who doesn’t reciprocate your feelings.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/20 03:45 PM
5

This is one of my biggest scares too. I understand the philosophy behind it but also it’s common knowledge women fare worse off in marriages in the first place so it’s not something I am not bothered about chasing. However; good vetting in the first place should reduce risk as much as possible I guess? If I had applied FDS to my ex husband he would have been gone the first time I found him in gaslighting before the first year was up. I mean I had a lot of FDS principles after leaving him before …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 10:07 AM
3

Honestly, I’m so proud to have made it out the other side and able to speak about it with other women so that they hopefully find ways to get out, or avoid it in the first place. I still have a lot of trauma responses to very benign actions sometimes, but I’m still in therapy and still working on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 09:53 AM
4

I LOOOOVE this book. Explained so much of what i went through so so eloquently. There’s no sugar coating their behaviour, there’s no excuses given. No one deserves to be abused. There’s no reason you could give to say it is acceptable for a man to behave that way. It explains some very nuanced levels of manipulation and abuse as well as more overt ones, and honestly one of the best things i’ve read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 10:48 PM
28

Trussstttt me. They know how to charm certain women. They play up what a good man they are. I keep messaging women in other subs who are mourning someone they might have met twice and now has mixed signals or got ghosted. They felt chemistry or a spark so that’s reason for them to attach themselves and start planning hypothetical futures, marriages and children. For a man they’ve met for a cumulative possibly 8 hours???! And they’re still hanging on after being disrespected and asking what they …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 10:08 PM
16

It was awful, but lessons learnt. I allowed him in, I saw the signs but i gave in to the want of being in any relationship. No one deserves to be treated like that. And we cannot change the fact there are people like that out there, just know how to avoid them. Every woman has personal responsibility over who they choose. The reason why I love this sub is that they give you harsh truths. Sometimes they’re uncomfortable, but if I had followed it earlier in life I would have never found myself in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 09:54 PM
124

Hits pretty close to home. My ex husband left me literally with zero money with a newborn whilst he was “donating money to church” but firstly to his own account, had gym memberships, lunches and dinners at fancy restaurants without me, sport club subscription, tv subscriptions etc etc I didn’t even realise what was happening. It pains me now to think this was just straight up financial abuse. I was begging friends and family for money even looking up food banks. BuT OH hES sUCh a GoOd MaN FoR G…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 06:13 PM
5

As if sugar daddies don’t exist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 11:10 AM
5

The DREAM. I don’t want to live with another person. There’s a potential someone living with you could make life easier, but all I can see is being annoyed and growing resentful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 11:05 AM
9

Ask yourself why, because it actually doesn’t matter if he’s in the same part of life as you. Age literally is no indication of how good a man is. I found more LVM older than me and more eligible men a few years younger. I used to also say no one younger but I narrowed my pool for no good reason except society says the man should be older because it’s the done thing. I didn’t want people referring to me as having a toy boy, and I also bought into the “men emotionally age later than women so date…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 11:03 AM
5

Omg no, he shouldn’t know. It’s literally just not his business.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 05:51 PM
11

I know right, these are basics lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 10:04 AM
7

At the start I thought bumble was great! I get to pick who to message, I don’t receive cringe openers. Soon realised I was matching a bunch of lazy guys who wanted me to do all the work, and actually this didn’t benefit me at all and was not EmPoWeRInG, just a con.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 10:02 AM
10

Ouch, younger me is triggered 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 09:27 AM
3

I am LOVING my thirties. My twenties I was a ball of insecurities, didn’t think much of myself, didn’t value myself, didn’t appreciate my worth as a woman, thought my only role was to help a man, didn’t work on any of my own hopes or dreams. I was a sad woman with no drive except for a relationship and was with someone who made it his life mission to bring me down. He knew I was out of his league. Right now, I think I look better than I ever have. My makeup is honed, I’ve developed my own sense …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 01:55 PM
3

Ah you sound happy and Im happy that although you know it’s a minor front, you’re still assessing and vetting him. Check with yourself regularly if he’s still hitting the mark. It’s nice that it can be public but it’s still very early days, as I’m sure you know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 01:45 PM
2

lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 01:29 PM
15

Oh dear lord amen, i have never read something so word for word how i would describe what happened to me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 07:48 PM
5

I just want to say I love your story, and i love hearing love come back after an abusive relationship. I used to think there were no good men out there, I mean I proved myself wrong, but i love hearing others too. I’m really happy you’ve found someone who cherishes you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 11:38 AM
2

This situation is sooooo scary when you have a child. You know your partners not behaving right, you might not call it abusive but you know it’s wrong. I’ve been through it too, and also helped a friend through it. What helped her most was to talk about the child. She didn’t value herself, most mums put themselves at the bottom of the pile. And you can’t get her to do a 180 on her view of herself while she’s with him and while she has a young child. Talk to her about what she wants the baby to s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 10:02 AM
3

Just say no it’s too far for you to travel to. If he says it’s too far for him then ok, this won’t work then!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 09:42 AM
7

This is horrible, you uprooted your entire life (which is GIGANTIC BY THE WAY) for a promise that he never delivered on. Love. Pack your things one more time and move back home. This is not how you want your relationship to start. This is the beginning of a slew of broken promises. Go back home to your family and friends, and go get your dog. It’ll hurt for a while, but you don’t deserve this. If you forgive him for this, hell know he can do it again and you’ll forgive him. You deserve a very ba…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 09:36 AM
1

I don’t think so, I think it’s ok to have people you’re allowed to have certain conversations with and some people that you know you can’t. Most people can’t be a be all for every single thing I have an interest or opinion on. My Dads only advice to me was to date a man less intelligent than I am. I’m not really sure what I make of that lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 09:21 AM
4

Nope!! Gained everything I knew previously from what I thought I should do culturally and societally. Now obviously I have a different mentality, and although my mum couldn’t prevent me making some mistakes, I now get to talk to her about her not making them, and where things went wrong with previous relationships. She said to me the other day, I think people just treat you the way you allow them to. I said yes!! Whatever you tolerate is how they know they can treat you. So if you want more, dem…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 09:17 AM
6

I’m only a year in and he probably isn’t text book HVM as i’m not textbook HVW. However, he showed from the very start he’s not afraid to make effort, not afraid to step up and meet my expectations, he’s thoughtful, genuine and caring. He treats me without any expectation of anything in return. aHe’s an excellent communicator and listener, and treats myself, my house and my child with utmost respect. He works at a good job, helps his family, has good prospects and plenty of drive and motivation.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 09:15 PM
1

Bahahaha everything I own is print! Ok. not everything. But majority of my trousers have a print and I look great so 💅🏼💅🏼 lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 02:55 PM
3

PersonLly the only thing i disagree with on here is the stance on sex. I understand it! I get why it’s important, I get why it’s advocated on here to a T. However i think having sex early, eliminates men who only look for sex whilst being able to have sex lol. But I enjoy it. And i set the tone. Ive had sex on first dates and dump them after if they’re shit. I know it goes against principles but don’t beat yourself up. It’s still up to you which parts you agree and disagree with and it’s ok to d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 02:35 PM
4

The fact you have to ask it speaks volumes. You know somethings off otherwise you’d go about your way. No it is not healthy to shout and intimidate someone. Leaving or not is not my place to say. But the fact your relationship has this issue shows it isn’t what it should be. Personally I wouldn’t tolerate this. It escalates in my experience and they don’t know boundaries once they’re allowed to treat you this way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 01:26 PM
11

Watching how he behaves when drunk, stressed, angry. Drunk often let’s you into parts of his mind he doesn’t acknowledge while sober, is he good under pressure and does he crack with anger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 10:04 AM
4

bahaha hahah i felt the same with my cat!! My husband left me and my infant son a number of years ago. Cue my desperation, depression, anxiety. I wanted more kids and i became DESPERATE. I started dating too early after separation and would have rebounded onto someone terrible. My house felt empty, it was quiet, I was happy the man who had abused me and my son was gone but I missed his presence. Somehow in all that though I bought a cat. And literally my world changed 😂😂. My house felt lively, a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 11:00 AM
4

omg this. and a good man listens and makes notes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 10:52 AM
6

Don’t pay his debts!!!!!! Lol seems simple but every damn boyfriend before my current one, I did this so that they could stop using it as an excuse to not do things for me. But with those kinds of guys, they just see weakness and take advantage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 10:52 AM
2

I also do not have a desire to be married and that isn’t my end goal. I have been married and I understand it is there to protect me and without that certificate I honesty wouldn’t be standing on my two feet today after divorce. But the situation has now changed for me personally . Marriage now would mean I agree that what’s mine is his. And currently I own more assets. A prenup in the UK has no guarantee of being upheld, as marriage supersedes it. I potentially lose out on spousal maintenance b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 10:49 AM
12

We really should be complimenting each other more. We do so much completely unnoticed, and i dunno to me it feels so much stronger coming from a woman too. I rmenever being in my teens and confiding in a girlfriend that i was insecure about my boobs because they were small. She told me I was tall and skinny and my boobs suited me, i would look weird if I had ones like hers. And I dunno, something was so sincere about it, i never even questioned my boobs ever again, i literally loved them. She ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 07:04 PM
6

I like this. I was fdsing before I knew what it was and since that time i’m just immune to compliments. I just don’t hold much weight to any of them. I know I look good, I know I’m a good mum, I know i’m kind etc etc Someone telling me I look good is always met with “i know, but thank you for noticing” lol. Youre right it’s not letting yourself rely on someone else validating the things you know about yourself. That used to be how i let myself be defined, and all it did was fuel more insecuritie…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 10:33 AM
3

I really don’t like it either, and although I’m repulsed by a lot of things reposted, by focussing on making fun of those men is really negative and isn’t helping women in dating. It’s a bit more of a circlejerk of we would never fall for this terrible behaviour! I guess it can be argued it’s what to avoid but I don’t think it’s very relevant to the reasons why i subscribed here 🤷🏻‍♀️.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 10:17 AM
29

I wouldn’t want to be engaged after only a year or year and a half. I’m currently hitting the year mark now and if he proposed i’d freak out. BUT i was married 4 years ago with an abusive man, and i’m not over the trauma yet. As much as I have zero evidence this man will mistreat me, I just don’t know if he will turn on me in the future, and I want a much larger time frame before I want to make that commitment. So i guess I’m not ready for it even though everything he does says he will make a fa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 03:29 AM
35

Can the fourth panel be the man plotting his revenge for her moving on?! Because after he realises he’s lost you he MUST PUNISH. (Only applicable to despicable abusive men) hhahah
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 08:49 AM
7

same for me but with a kid lol. I’m a single mum. Life is already a level of difficult. I do everything. The last thing i want is another grown adult join my house and create more work then i already do as a single mum because he refuses to accept a split of household chores. Or worse expects to be congratulated for doing so? One of my aunties once told me don’t accept anyone into your house that doesn’t make your life BETTER and EASIER. Way back that used to make me feel uncomfortable because a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 04:46 PM
9

Literally! I was so sad that people thought this was solid advice. this is what was needed in order for people to act decently is rewarding them with treats for good behaviour. i don’t even reward my young son with rewards for good behaviour , he knows it’s expected of him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 10:36 AM
61

Someone posted in there a video of Jordan Peterson’s relationship advice (....i know) but i’m never one to not see what someone with different views has to say. He essentially said men needed to be trained like dogs by presenting them with rewards every time they do a behaviour you want them to and to give it time... Sorry but wtf?! I will not reward my boyfriend for doing tthe dishwasher in order for him to do it more often??? Honestly I will kick him out if he disrespects me and my space in th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 09:53 AM
5

I wish I was joking but this article reads like my ex husbands reasons for divorce 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 04:34 PM
1

Mine is super sensitive to my schedule and will plan everything around when i am available. One of our early dates he took me to a musical in the west end. He’d told me numerous times he wasn’t into them but he still knew how much i was and decided to book tickets and take me. Turns out he really enjoyed it and we have another one coming up this year. In essence with dates he just takes me places he knows I will enjoy, as i’m not so much a dinner person. If he’s uncertain he asks and then follow…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 02:58 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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