TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

goldiebaby Archive

View 5 posts and 196 comments by goldiebaby on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
15

Married 10+ years. I have my own office/library space with a recliner and drink station. I retreat here when I need my space. I do yoga 3X a week on my own time. I go a women-only spa and sauna with my girlfriends once a week. I hang out with my girlfriends including taking international vacations with them. I visit my sister alone. I volunteer sans husband. My husband does the same and it's super important that my man has a stable life on his own. We do a ton of stuff together and I love spendi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/22 07:20 PM
3

No, it's impractical and bad planning to buy a house with friends. What happens when they stop paying their share of the mortgage or home repairs? What if they move in men or have kids who'll require more space? It'll only work if the property is an investment and the buyers all agree to rent it out for income. Even then, so much work to agree on repairs, updates, lease terms etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 06:47 PM
101

10+ years with my husband and I still have my maiden name and will never change it. I want to keep my connection to my culture. I have a great dad who sacrificed and worked to give me an amazing life. I want to honor him. My law office has my maiden name. It's a great way to weed out insecure fuckbois. Most importantly, I want to avoid the utter humiliation of changing my name back if I get divorced. I see my peers doing it and it's cringe. Good job giving up your identity to your husband and wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/22 01:21 AM
480

Gigi was screwed being raised by her trash parents and she unsurprisingly chose a trash partner. Having a kid in an on-off relationship is a bad idea. I hope she and her kid are OK.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 03:07 PM
12

I am married and love being married, but my husband makes more than me. If he was significantly lower income or if I was crazy rich celebrity, I wouldn't marry anyone. I would be happy to have a ceremony, but nothing legally binding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 08:59 PM
68

This woman is so classy! No grotesque fillers or surgery, no drama, no sleazy movies or shows. A great role model for young girls! PS - Thank you Rashida for aging like a normal human. You can see lines and some sagging on the face, but she is still stunning and healthy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 07:12 PM
36

Kylie Jenner is worth $800million to 1 billion while Travis scott is worth $50 million. It's more advantageous for her not to marry him and pay alimony. Gigi and Zayn are of similar wealth, but we don't know how much of his wealth is in the US v UK (his home country). If I had married my ex (who did propose), I would be paying alimony since I made 5X his income. I even bought a condo that would have become marital property. Oprah has been with her man for decades and didn't marry him. It's such …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 07:06 PM
12

Thanks so much for your experience! It's good to hear both positive and negative stories. I am not worried about getting a spot in the school. My husband is pretty high up in tech and the schools shamelessly recruit him for a spot on the board or hit us up for donations. They pretty much guarantee a spot for any future kids, but our public school is also super highly ranked, so it feels weird to opt for a private school. Our area is super wealthy, but only the "weird" kids attend private school.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 07:34 PM
10

Every time I hear about negative private school experiences, they are strongly tied to religion. I would never pick a religious school for my kids. I have been considering a STEM school with zero religion. The stats from the school are impressive and not just stuff about college. Graduating classes report high levels of confidence, stronger mental health and lower interest in "girly" stuff like clothes, make-up and obsessive grooming like shaving and hair styling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 07:26 PM
43

Oof that sounds rough! I am sorry to hear about your experience. I have been eyeing a STEM middle and high school for girls. It has zero religion and lots of socialization opportunities with the local high school for extra-curriculars. I heard the principal talk about how much better girls focused in school and the stats really impressed me. Less focus on clothes/make-up, better mental health and more confidence were some of the statistics cited.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 07:22 PM
3

Can I ask why private school was awful?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 07:07 PM
21

Isn't that how the Salem witch trials started? I grew up in Germany, so not really well-versed with that part of American history, but I went on a Salem tour one year and the tour guide said that the main motivation to brand women as witches was to steal widows' land and money? Apparently back then, men would die well before their wives and other men (usually extended family members like a random cousin or uncle) would make insulting, low-ball offers for the widows' farm or land. Women who were …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 10:50 PM
97

But she also fucks a married co-worked whom she just met. Granted she may not have been aware of his marital status, but it's not HV to fuck a co-worker within a few hours/days of meeting. I actually do enjoy the show a lot and find her character to be mostly HV.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 10:22 PM
178

The nails bit really annoys the shit out of me! 10-15 years ago, mani-pedis were mainly about shaping and painting nails and fake nails were for special events like weddings. Now it's all about chemical crap like powder/gel nails all the time. Mani-pedis went from special occasion to "regular grooming" every 2 weeks. Now you have women calling their nails "gross" for being bare. Meanwhile men are still praised for clipping their nails once a month. I am so over current consumeristic culture push…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 12:26 AM
84

I never understood when people claim EE women didn't age. I have traveled to Russia a lot and women there age quite badly. So many lines and wrinkles in their late 20's already. My Russian friend calls it the "babushka bomb." I do however feel like women are not really overweight there. I think food quality is much better than the US and they walk a lot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 12:17 AM
3

I am ok though. I grew up in Germany with a lenient Korean mother and a white father. While I did spend every summer back in Korea, I was always an outsider due to being mixed race and living abroad and didn't really face the same pressures. Everyone knew I was going back to Germany in 2-3 months. To make matters worse, I do have certain white features like double eyelids and light skin that people fetishized. I was also criticized by random aunties for being too big or having frizzy hair, but I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 07:07 PM
11

In my mother's family and socio-economic group (upper middle class) it's not acceptable. Even if it were acceptable, most women don't want the kids to suffer. The kids might get bullied in school for having a single mom by choice. They might not get romantic partners who want someone from a good family.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 02:18 AM
22

Get this - job applicants are required o submit photos with their applications/resume! It's an open fact that employers pick better looking candidates, especially for women. I do believe that unattractive women fare badly in corporate Korea or retail. They usually do better in self-employment or jobs that don't focus on looks like childcare providers, nursing and teaching. Pretty much every Korean woman I know (upper middle class) spends a shit load of money on beauty and surgery. Even lower inc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 02:15 AM
237

Half-Korean here and let's see what's expected of Korean women. Live with in-laws in a tiny condo and be the perfect wife, mother and daughter. Endure tons of abuse from nasty in-laws while waiting on them hand and foot. Watch husband blow his money on booze and club girls. Watch husband get a mistress since it's basically the norm in Korea. Get plastic surgery starting at 16 and until you basically die. Bleach your skin and eat like a bird to stay skinny. Get a respectable job and be the perfec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 11:59 PM
7

I know she is a pickme, but this poor woman didn't stand a chance. - Raised in a trailer park by a Christian fundie parents. Hello, slut shaming and religious oppression. - Physically abused by her Pastor dad in a degrading manner as punishment. She talks about stripping her underwear and bending over to get spanked and it got to a point where she was suicidal. - Homeschooled by her mom which most likely meant she received a piss poor "education." - "Graduated" at 15 aka she her homeschool simpl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 11:04 PM
61

It really depends on the country and state you are in. In community property states in the US, SAHM's get 50% of assets after 10 years of marriage including pension, retirement and 401k accounts. In my state, it's illegal to freeze your spouse out of the finances and you get temp support even if your husband walks out. Due to all the rich tech workers, even child support is getting pushed to 21 -24 years for kids and a ton of support orders mandate that the earning parent pay for kids' college. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 06:26 PM
19

I think it's all about the $$$. Will and Jada have ridiculous amounts of money and confirmed that they don't have a pre-nup. The split will be hella expensive for Will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 06:16 PM
19

Will confirmed in an interview that he did indeed cheat multiple times and fantasized about having a harem of gfs including Halle Berry. I just saw the article yesterday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 06:12 PM
137

Lol every dude is 6'2" online. He's definitely 5'8" and 180 lbs in real life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 06:09 PM
11

While your advice is generally good, it only applies if you have good roommates and have the ability to care for a dog at that age. When I was in college, my one roommate was the absolute worst and refused to help in any way when my drunk ex tried to break in. My other roommate spent 99% of her time with her bf. Also, most college student apartments were not dog friendly and I didn't have the time to walk, play with and care for a dog. Vet bills would have ruined me. If I could give any advice, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 05:37 PM
177

Actually, the host did call him out on it, but had to cut him off after he started spewing obscenities at the woman for refusing to re-consider.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/21 11:50 PM
239

100% agree, but I was using language that the woman used. She did not call it rape (she should have) and the hosts were horrified.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/21 11:47 PM
232

She got pregnant by him after only dating for 2-3 months and he was an immature fuckboi. It should have been a quick fling at best. A life lesson for young women to double down on BC while young and dating around. You don't want to be tied to a loser through a child who now gets to grow up with a shitty dad. Also, please don't have sex so soon. It's simply not worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 02:17 AM
106

Gosling and Mendes don't weird me out at all. She was way older and more established when she met Ryan Gosling. She had made her money and fame and most likely wanted to take a break and enjoy her kids. Gosling is not older than her and she is 7 years his senior actually. I also think she wanted kids soon v. him baby trapping her. She was nearly 40. I am in in 30's and made good money as a lawyer, but absolutely plan to quit my job as soon as I get pregnant and will most likely take a decade off…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 12:01 AM
26

Ugh that sucks! Sorry! I have a similar story - when I was in college, one of my closest friends had a huge crush on my then bf's roommate. I was hanging out at said bf's house and casually asked his roommate what he thought of my friend. His response? A vile tirade about how ugly she was and he wouldn't f*ck her even if someone paid him a million bucks. I was so shocked that I immediately told my friend to stay away from him and paraphrased his rant in a kinder manner. A couple months later, my…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 09:00 PM
11

Or normalize single/divorced parents dating with their children in mind. Single parents I know (both men and women) are super desperate. I find their actions shocking. Childless people make bad choices too, but innocent kids don't have deal with the fallout. This may be an unpopular opinion, but parents need to accept that life will be much harder with kids and they may never to date for a long time and be ok with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 07:02 PM
9

Do not fall for liberal white self-hating BS that only white people are racist. I am Korean and the vast majority of Koreans I know are racist towards other minorities. Koreans tend to worship white people, so they get a pass usually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 06:30 PM
1

That's exactly my point. It's clear that Pugh wants household fame in the US. She moved to LA and started acting in commercial Hollywood movies v. sticking to arthouse. If she wants fame and money, it doesn't bother me that she uses an older man to get it. Zach Braff may no longer be working, but he certainly has plenty of contacts and pull in the industry. Not to mention, he is rich and Pugh can afford to live in luxury while looking for roles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 06:24 PM
29

Um, this guy is a rich and powerful producer and I had no idea who Daddario was. Upon googling her, it's apparent that her career has stalled and dating this guy is means to an end. I mean I really don't care if she wants to get acting gigs by dating a producer who has tons of contacts in the industry. If that's how she chooses to get ahead, it's her choice. I find the same thing with Florence Pugh and the Scrubs actor. She was mainly in Indie British films and after dating him, she is cast in B…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 11:46 PM
10

What are your hobbies? Meet up groups for hobbies are a good way some of my friends have met HVM. LVM generally will not invest time, money and consistency in a hobby. Religious/cultural groups. Volunteering - I met my only HV ex when I joined the fundraising board of a local charity. I am now in a mentoring group that sets up adults to mentor low-income youth and I encounter many HV men who care about their community and giving back. My husband is a volunteer dog walker for our shelter and it's…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 10:40 PM
205

If that's his first date planning, you can expect to become the kind of wife/mom who buys her own gifts with her own cash, wraps it herself and gives it to herself while her husband is parked in front of the TV.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 09:59 PM
3

Leggings and t shirt in cool weather, shorts and t-shirt in warm weather. Zero make-up. Hair in a loose braid, bun or pony tail. I have never and will never doll up just to hang at home. I barely get dolled up regardless. I love being natural. It's freeing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 12:18 AM
2

Oh no doubt many foreigners loves the sexist culture. My own bosses at my law firm were like that. They LOVED Japanese culture, including their toxic work culture. They used to lament US employment laws and fantasize about firing the pregnant associates or enforce non-competes so employees wouldn't be able to leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 12:46 AM
2

For the sake of client confidentiality, I can neither confirm nor deny the name of the company.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 12:42 AM
1

Apparently they went out drinking on Friday night as is customary and the manager ordered the new hire to strip in a private room at a club as a form of a hazing ritual. She said she complied because she feared losing her job. Also, this story was corroborated by a male co-worker who was there and he said it was "all in good fun."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 12:40 AM
12

There is NOTHING more that triggers society as a whole, than a woman living her life, being independent, minding her own business and living alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 06:41 PM
107

I have no idea why Japan gets a pass in Western society. They are so conservative and misogynistic! I used to work at a law firm that had a ton of Japanese clients. First, they protested when I was assigned to their cases because they wanted a male lawyer. Second, when I used to travel there, they were openly sexist about everything - I was asked not to wear pant suits and wear skirts instead. They didn't like my hair wavy. They hated my red lipstick. I wasn't invited to their post work drinking…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:38 AM
49

Is she from another country/culture? I am half-Korean and my Korean fam likes to say stuff like this. Especially the older Korean ladies. They love to ask my sister why she is single at 30 and gasping that "time's running out," while their husbands have cheated on them all their lives, have mistresses and entire 2nd/3rd families.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:26 AM
15

I know you are joking, but it's very common for the same nasty "logic" to be applied to DV victims. They are asked what they did to provoke anger/violence from men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 06:55 PM
20

Per the article, the woman who did these edits was Anne Irwin. Why am I not surprised? Every single "dress code" issue in my teenage years, whether at school/extra-curriculars/personal life, was always enforced by a middle-aged pickme female. Pickme women get worse as they age and their looks fade. They are so used to pandering for the male gaze, that they can't handle being discarded by men. They resort to bitter displays of power over their "competition," aka teenage girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 06:52 PM
3

Yet another pickme trying to normalize trashy behavior to other women. Introducing your 9 yr old to a bf of 3 months is trashy. Letting them "bond" is trashy is every way. Either she gets her heart broken when you split or worst case, he's grooming her. Showing your daughter that it's ok to be desperate for a man is trashy. Showing your daughter that being a single mom means you need to devalue yourself is trashy. Just a whole lotta nope here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 06:44 PM
1

7+ years married and have not changed my last name and never will. I have both parents' last names and very happy with it. My dad is very HV and I am proud to have his name. He deserves it. My kids will have both last names (husband and I). Just FYI - it has never been an issue for me. We own multiple properties and business together and no one has given me grief over it. No issues from banks, sellers etc. I find it so embarrassing when women get divorced and still carry their ex's name. Changin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:41 PM
4

For those who have/want kids, it must become our biggest purpose to never let our daughters turn out like this. If your husband doesn't care about you, LEAVE! I can't imagine why she is with this man? What is she getting out of this marriage? No emotional, financial or mental support! She will literally have a much easier time financially if she divorces this NVM and accesses welfare.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:34 PM
8

There is a post on /r/datingover30 where a woman was practically rejoicing over the fact that she asked a guy out, and paid for 100% of the date. She was extolling the virtues of "stepping outside your comfort zone." Meanwhile, my mouth was agape reading that desperate saga. The guy didn't even bother asking her out on a 2nd date, but there she was acting like she won the lottery. How do women get like this? She is not a naïve teenager, but a mid-thirties woman!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:28 PM
45

You forgot another category of men who pursue conventionally unattractive girls because they expect these women to be easy. In High School there was always that one overweight girl who was swarmed by guys because she put out easily. Sorry for being crass about women's looks, but this is just how these men think.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:06 PM
4

Agreed. I don't evaluate or balance anything. If I feel good and enjoy my time with a friend, I will continue to nurture that friendship. If I leave feeling worse, I'll simply let that friendship die.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 07:33 PM
16

My husband worked at Microsoft and he has worked directly with BG several times. I have attended numerous parties at his house and been on his boat a bunch of times. My neighbor owns a luxury winery where BG loved to drink before he even created MS. BG is one the biggest jackasses ever. He is extremely rude, mean and condescending to his employees. He is widely known to scream at people and make them cry. This opinion is not even mine because I interacted with him during his "fun" events. My hus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:39 PM
26

Teigan also talks about being fck buddies with John Legend for a long time before she tried a bunch of antics to get him to commit. Also, who takes pictures of themselves miscarrying. Talking about it after the fact is normal and healthy, but I legit can't imagine asking someone to take pictures of me in the hospital bleeding and devastated. It feels performative to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 07:34 PM
3

Both he and his wife are/were avid bloggers and his wife used to blog about his wonderful qualities until 2 weeks before she died. I knew his wife personally and attended many dinners, parties, doggy play dates and even camping trips with them. I spent time with his wife one-on-one. Many things listed here are objectively HV. You are probably jaded from LV men, but it's ok to keep an open mind and appreciate a HV man. I am not a "rabid fan." This is an anonymous post meant to dissuade women from…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 07:11 PM
27

I never understood men (or women) who complain that marriages end and thus, they'll never marry. It's the relationship that ends, isn't it? A divorce is simply a legal break-up. Why would you get into a long term relationship at all if you are so afraid of it ending? Clearly you are willing to invest time, effort, energy, emotions, sex and money into someone else?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 06:24 PM
18

Yes! Finally someone who has a normal head on her shoulders. All of this toxic body positivity needs to stop. No, you don't need to get fillers and surgery to feel better. Get therapy and work on deriving happiness from other things - family, friends, hobbies, pets, even your job. The last time I railed against surgery on this sub, I was downvoted for my stance. Women commenting that they love the attention from strangers when they fillers etc. How the fck is this normal? Seeking validation from…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 05:17 PM
14

"potentially something good on a regular basis" WTF does that even mean? She gets the privilege of being your fck buddy? Sometimes? When you are horny? Also, his offer is to have a drink and then hook up right away? The audacity is just amazing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 07:22 PM
35

Yeah, lust-based sex in the beginning stages of a relationship totally determines the sex life of a couple over the years. I read that 95% of people have pre-marital sex, yet the divorce rate is between 40-50%? Emotional, financial and logistical compatibility first! Sexual compatibility after. If Step 1 is a bust, don't bother moving on to test sexual compatibility
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 04:49 PM
1

My client is suing her ex-husband on charges that he hid assets during their divorce. She recently told me that the forensic accountant found her ex's sham LLC called "B.I.G LLC." The LLC documents showed that he full name to be "Believe in God LLC." These religious nuts are really quite something.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 07:19 PM
8

Honestly, this particular trait is very easy to vet. Show up at his home frequently and on the fly. Observe how his home, bed and bathroom look like. Are his sheets clean and changed regularly? Look under his sinks and inside his closets to see if he owns cleaning supplies. Cook together and observe the dynamic - does he clean up after Does he need overly detailed instructions? Does he do the dishes? Peek inside his closet and see if he has clean clothes that are neatly organized v. dumped on a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 01:54 AM
5

Tenant rights only require a 30 day notice in most states. I am sure she got a letter from her in-laws and that would suffice. It looks like there was 4 months between the death and her moving out, so she probably got the notice sometime after the birth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 10:07 PM
4

In this specific scenario, your cousin wouldn't have received the house even if she was married to the guy. His parents owned the house and both of them were merely tenants. As for being on the deed, it looks like his parents were not on board with gifting their son and his family a home. I mean, what kinda people kick out their own newborn grand baby? There was nothing stopping your cousin and her partner from buying their own house, having both names on the lease and creating a survivorship ag…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 10:03 PM
4

This is my biggest issue with therapy. Finding the right one can be a painful and expensive process. My husband sought therapy in college about his abusive, fundie Christian mother. Turns out his therapist was religious and told him that she was only doing her best and loved him unconditionally. She pushed forgiveness instead. This is the woman who beat and fractured my husband's hand at the age of 12 because he committed the sin of reading Harry Potter. She refused to take him to the hospital e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 09:23 PM
11

I have heard that using pepper spray can be risky for the user too? Apparently it's really to spray yourself? I have a canister, but I feel unsure now. I have a large dog and men avoid me when they see him, but wondering what a good self-defense weapon is when my dog is not with me?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 09:06 PM
39

That doesn't explain why women are still foregoing kids in Europe where there is a solid safety nets for mothers. I am originally from Germany and only know 3 friends from back home who have kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 11:59 PM
89

I mean, talk is cheap. The only takeaway from this scandal is that DJ is LV and his wife is a pickme and they both succumbed to being the very things they railed against. I don't know, or care why men are using this as an example of women having high standards. Clearly DJ's wife has no standards for still sticking with this fool. It doesn't matter what people think. It's your life and you get to make the rules. Also, why should anyone be "sad and disappointed" when a fraud is outed. They hoarded…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 11:54 PM
5

Agreed. I see women wasting so much time on pointless conversations with fuckbois on these apps. You need to find hobbies, meet people and build a network. Even for female friendships, that's the way to go. I tried Bumble when I first moved to Seattle. What a shit show! MLM huns, scammers, cheaters galore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 11:39 PM
5

Italy's economy is in the shitter and as a German, Italians are considered poor and there a ton of Italians seeking work in Germany. Regardless of their culture, they simply can't afford to rent. If they rent, they'll never be able to buy and in many cases, they can't buy period. The Italians I knew lived with their parents and waited to inherit their houses. There are so many court cases there with siblings fighting over their inherited home. Frankly, I don't really buy the cultural excuse thes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 03:17 AM
2

This is 100% Southern religious BS in action. For those talking about retail theft, make up, candy and baby stuff has a way higher rate of theft than condoms and preg tests. Further, other states don't lock up this stuff and use vending machines if theft is truly such a big deal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 09:25 PM
104

If your husband can't understand chore priorities, you have a shit husband. It's really as simple as that. Every family has a hierarchy of needs with meals at the top, kids stuff next and a clean house after that. If you ignore the important chores to wash & detail your car for 6 hours, that's a hobby and not a chore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 09:10 PM
19

While also expecting the woman to work full-time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 09:00 PM
15

Ghosting is the best way to maintain your sanity and safety. 99% of the time when a woman tries to end a relationship in a normal manner, she'll be subject to a volley of abuse. It sucks that an entire generation of men have been raised with the inability to accept rejection gracefully. It's not your problem. Ghost and move on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 10:16 PM
90

Even before I read your post, I knew this was a Muslim guy. Not trying to victim blame you, since you are obviously young and inexperienced. Islam is a very rigid religion and the countries where Islam is practiced often have very patriarchal cultures and the mix of the two really doesn't allow for religious compromise. Sure, Christians pull this shit too, but it's nowhere on the same scale or intensity. I would never date or marry a Muslim - even a moderate or casual Muslim. The "convert for me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:56 PM
26

Jealous of women with standards and self-confidence. This applies to other parts of your life too. My friend is a hairdresser who didn't go to college, but trained at hair schools in NYC, LA, Paris and Hong Kong. She owns a posh salon near me and charges $150 for a cut alone. She works 25 hrs/week and owns a home, car and travels (used to) all the time. The two of us joined a women's networking group and you won't believe the nasty comments she got about being "uneducated." These women had $80-1…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:45 PM
68

Is anyone really surprised when a religious man cheats? Anecdotally, religious men in my friend and co-worker circles were the most promiscuous. This transcends race and socio-economic lines. Self-professed "relationship experts" are the worst. Usually a toxic blend of God, traditional gender roles and pseudo-science.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:36 PM
8

Why don't you leave? You are clearly aware of how things will end up for you. If you dare to get sick or fat your husband will leave you and you'll be another bitter ex-wife who wasted the best decades of her life on a LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 01:51 AM
8

When I read these kind of posts, I must ask. Did she not vet him during the dating period? Dating is essentially an extended interview. How did he live during that time? How was his home? Did he cook and clean? If you lived together before marriage, how did you split chores? Did he hold up to his end of the bargain? Did he make nasty comments like the one above? Did he judge your cooking and cleaning skills? I dated a loser like him too, but the minute these kind of comments started, I quickly l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 07:17 PM
15

Please save some money to consult with an attorney. A good attorney can get you a decent standard of life post-divorce. My friend with MS left her husband and was ordered to keep her on his insurance until her disability was approved and she got on Medicaid. It took over 2 years. He is going to be paying alimony for a very long time due to her disability. She got 50% of his 401(k). He pays a large amount in child support even with 50/50 custody. Of course a lot of this will depend on your state,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 07:09 PM
8

I am happily married to a Russian man and I still warn women not to date Slavic men. My marriage works only because my husband is heavily American/Western-ized and does not have any connection to Slav culture. The interactions with his family, even those in the US, has been horrifying. Being half-Korean, I am no stranger to patriarchy, but at least Korean men take the role of providers seriously. Russian men can't even be bothered to support their families and fully expect their wives to work FT…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 12:18 AM
9

My sister said something similar, but money related about her ex and boy, did society, including other women revile her! She dated her ex from 20-25 and openly told people that she dumped him for being broke and unsuccessful while she hit 6 figures at 25. The anger from others was shocking!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 11:53 PM
3

Reminds me of Vanessa Bryant ranting at Evan R Wood for calling Kobe a rapist. Just because he may not have raped his wife, doesn't mean he didn't rape other women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:51 PM
10

Low-self esteem is the #1 reason why this happens. Until parents raise their daughters to be strong, confident and not conform to society's expectations, this will continue to happen. Parents who force their daughters to always look pretty, spend loads of time and effort on grooming, value their daughter's looks above all, push the narrative that they are worthless without a husband, tell them to "make it work" when they are trapped in a bad marriage, force the idea of perfection on them - you n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:50 PM
3

Unpopular opinion: I don't agree with or find value in couples therapy at all. If you are doing CT early on, you are simply incompatible. End it and move on. If you are in CT later in your marriage, it's usually because your spouse has fucked up too much and it's too late. Years of bad behavior/infidelity/abuse can't be undone. Once again, best to split and move on. I don't why people draw out the inevitable painfully. That said, I do think individual therapy can be useful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:39 PM
2

Religious women have a shockingly low bar for men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:38 AM
4

Yeesh. What is the matter with you? First, you marry someone who is totally incompatible with you because he improved your financial status? Kids are the literal #1 thing to agree on. Then you get pissy about his stance on kids, which was clear to you even pre-marriage. A vasectomy before you even married! wasn't clear enough? This is such LV behavior just for money and a house. Maybe you should have worked towards making money for yourself, so you wouldn't end up so desperate for a good life. M…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:26 AM
5

Same here. My husband works in Tech and it's a fantastic career option for a husband IMO. Even before COVID, my husband worked from home a lot, took plenty of time off, no partying or happy hours with co-workers. I had no idea there was such a stigma! Personally, I highly recommend tech guys. It's probably the only career where you can make great money with only a BS degree and probably the only high-paying career with a normal work-life balance. My husband gets unlimited sick leave (he took 2 m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:16 AM
22

Ugh no. This is such an idiotic post. I can't even. Spoken like someone who is clueless about corporate America. To young women reading this - please do not be influenced by this woman's crippling low self-esteem and run around straightening your hair and other crap thinking it helps your "career." Corporate America only cares about 1 thing and that's money. If you can make or save large amounts of money for the company, literally no one gives a shit about your looks. You will be promoted based …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 07:14 AM
10

My ex before my husband was a total douche. I started dating my now-husband 2 weeks after the break-up. I also took a social media vow of silence during that time and posted nothing about my relationship. Eventually, I was happier not being on SM, so I stopped posting altogether. 3 years later, about a week before my wedding, I get a text from a random number. It turned out to be my ex who wanted to "reconnect." I responded with a photo of my wedding invite and cue epic meltdown. 60+ texts about…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 07:52 PM
14

I don't really agree with this X profession = cheaters at all. My friend's husband is a boring office worker who was found to have cheated with his equally boring married female co-worker. Another friend's husband was a contractor who had an all-male crew and worked mainly in commercial construction around other men (no housewives) and yet, he cheated with a waitress who served him lunch at his fav lunch spot. I think it's a bad way to vet based on profession. You should consider each man's circ…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 07:10 PM
20

I am on the fence about kids, but as a "career woman," I froze my eggs at 25 and made my husband freeze semen too. If we can't conceive naturally, I will use the frozen material for IVF or hire a surrogate if my body won't cooperate. If I were single, I planned to use donor sperm and have kids. My sister is 30 and single and has banked her eggs too. She plans to use donor sperm if she is single by 35. Like you said, high-powered women will plan for all contingencies. Kamala Harris has no biologi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 09:44 PM
2

They may not worship them, but they are beyond obsessed with them. MENA women are stunning, but the men idolize white women over them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 09:30 PM
6

Even if he wants to marry you, he'll expect you to convert to Islam, raise kids fully Muslim, dress in varying degrees of modesty and defer to his parents. Even "liberal" Muslim men will pull this shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 09:28 PM
3

100% agree with your comment! Op's post is just awful. She is 37 and complaining that her mom didn't force her to get married at 18? First, no teenager would give a shit about mom's opinions and even if she did, OP would be here dissing her mom for forcing her backward beliefs on OP and forcing her into a failed marriage at 18. If you wanted to learn to cook and clean, why didn't you ask your mom as an adult? My mom didn't teach me how to cook either, but that was so I could focus on school and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 07:32 PM
218

Liberal Feminism: Women can and should do it all! Get an education, pay bills, birth kids, raise kids, take care of the house, take care of your man, perform every sex act he desires or else you are a prude, don't get fat or ugly, take care of aging parents, change your own oil, take care of grandkids. Also Liberal Feminism: How dare you expect a man to make money and support a family! Your man held your baby for 5 min? Give him an award and a bl*w job.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:51 PM
3

This is wonderful and one of the best ways to vet a man is to observe their behavior when you are sick or injured. Anything less than full support should result in an immediate break-up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:37 PM
10

It's a heady rush of power that these successful men would leave everything for the young girl. It makes them seem powerful. I normally see this pattern with young women who grew up in shitty circumstances, super religious homes or low-income homes. They feel powerless and worthless and this is a way to obtain power and money easily.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:31 PM
12

Any man who subscribes to the Madonna/Whore complex is bad news!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:27 PM
32

But how will they have their cake and eat it too? They want someone at home, the stability of a long-term partner who will take care of you, raise your kids, contribute financially, give them status in society as a married person, be there for the hard times, take care of in-laws all while the "poly" partner sleeps their way around town. Poly is such a scam.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:25 PM
5

Being legally bound is not a big deal as long as you: Are financially independent. Do not have kids too soon. A divorce is not a big deal imo. Being stuck with a child, fighting over child custody, child support, shitty in-laws raising your kid, a revolving door of new partners messing with your kid, half/step siblings, step-parents. Ugh no thanks. Have a good income and good birth control!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 07:32 PM
4

There are a certain class of NVM who proudly advertise that they are absent fathers. The main reason is to show women that they have all the free time in the world to date. I have no idea what kind of self-respecting woman would ever find that attractive!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 10:15 PM
7

Beautiful and EXTREMELY affordable in the US? This screams "I exploit Asian women who were forcibly trafficked and have no legal status in the US." I am no expert, but American prostitutes who are beautiful are not affordable and those who are affordable are not beautiful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 06:41 PM
43

I am half-Korean and every time someone goes on about But KoREaN SkiNcArE Is EmPOwErING, I just want to slap some sense into them. The 12-step skincare routine in Korea has not been shown to do any better than a regular cleanse-moisturize and sunscreen routine. Korean culture is highly consumeristic (not really a word) and these elaborate routines push women to spend their hard-earned money. The real reason women have good skin is due to invasive procedures and not some lotion. Women get all kin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 06:37 PM
9

Men are expected to stay skinny in S Korea, not fit or even healthy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 06:14 PM
19

Eh, this "explanation" is so gross. Any man who thinks like this is trash even if you "play the game right" and get him interested before sex. Now, I fully stand by the belief that women should before they have sex, but the reason is for women to have a clear head and assess the partner thoroughly. I waited several months, but it for ME. I wanted to avoid unnecessary sexual and emotional entanglements early on. I wanted to protect my physical and emotional health. I wanted to make sure that he u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 02:10 AM
18

I mean no one, literally no one is stopping men from eschewing women in favor in cars, video games or whatever. Bro, find your happiness in your car and leave women alone. Womankind collectively thanks you for sparing them the pain and trauma of being in a situationship with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 12:05 AM
24

Ladies, this is an excellent lesson/exercise in learning that a seemingly HV man is not really HV. Henry Cavill has all the trappings of a HV man. He is very good looking and fit. He clearly takes great care of himself - he has great skin, hair (even facial hair), teeth and body. He dresses well and appears classy. He is confident, articulate and personable. He is rich. He is successful. Despite the HV exterior, he is clearly a nasty misogynist creepy pedo. He is living every man's dream and yet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 12:01 AM
13

If it helps you move on, EVERY single woman I know has made poor romantic/friend choices in her youth. This crosses all demographic lines - socioeconomic, education, race, religion, country, culture, urban, rural etc. You need to look at it almost like a rite of passage into womanhood that has taught you important life lessons. Hopefully, you will apply these lessons to your future choices and end up exactly where you need to be. The real pickemes are those who make the same mistakes over and ov…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 03:11 AM
4

I agree with /u/YukiCatKingdom. My husband is one of my best friends, but not the only one. My other best friends include my sister, 2 childhood friends and 2 college friends. Not a lot, but I am happy with my circle. It took years before I added my husband to this category. I also find it very difficult to have a happy marriage if you don't have a solid friendship with your spouse. Romance, sex, friendship, partnership skills, parenting skills (if you choose kids) all form unique pieces of the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 03:06 AM
3

Girl, since you already have an attorney, why are you still confused? Your attorney is right, pre-nups almost never get enforced even in the US. It may work if your fiance is independently wealthy and both of you want to keep the wealth separate. Marrying in the US is pointless unless you live here, have all your assets here and eventually divorce here. A foreign court in the Netherlands will NOT enforce an American pre-nup. Your lawyer should have given you info about trusts and Panama banks to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 06:33 PM
13

Nope, none of this is true. I am an attorney and have drafted countless pre-nups, including for celebrities,. This whole post is just no. The vast majority of pre-nups don't hold up in court even in the US. The ones that are enforced are when both spouses were independently wealthy before the marriage and seek to protect their pre-marriage assets. You can still be on the hook for post-marriage wealth gain. In the rare occurrence that a pre-nup with adultery is enforced, you must still provide co…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 06:29 PM
14

While it sucks to be dumped at the last minute, at least you are not out $1k. At the end of the day, you can't really vet 100%, but mainly minimize risk. By not paying for a trip, it's on the guy to pick up the initiative and that alone will weed out a large number of fuckboys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 01:18 AM
261

Mistake #1 - Paying for rental for only a boyfriend. Let him pay for it. Even if you are one of those 50-50 feminists, make him pay upfront and venmo your share AFTER the trip. But seriously, stop booking trips and buying expensive gifts for guys you are merely dating. Wife effort for some rando, SMH.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/20 10:28 PM
5

When is society going to stop with it with the "tee hee man so dumb" routine? My husband perfectly gift wraps my gifts after watching a simple youtube tutorial. This man was raised in a dirt-poor, fundie Christian home where he never, ever received a gift! He even buys biodegradable paper and ribbon to comply with my lifestyle. He also bakes and frosts elaborate cakes from scratch for my birthday, researches and makes reservations at fine-dining vegetarian restaurants (I don't eat meat and don't…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 01:30 AM
2

Maybe, but I am German and I live in the US. I just feel like women back home are not expected to adhere to high standards of grooming like American women. Daily hair and make up are uncommon, women dress more comfortably, pubic hair is not expected to be removed and even pit hair is not a total shocker. I am sure men are just as gross, but women have more freedom to be themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 06:17 AM
3

I am German too, but live in the US. I am sure the men are just as gross, but I am talking about their expectations from women re: grooming. It just seems like my friends and family are not really overdoing the hair/make up stuff like American women. Shaving is not a big thing, women keep their pubes and even pit hair is not considered super offensive like it is in the US. Even women in corporate America dress is such uncomfortable clothing, while women in Germany can get away with a lot more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 06:15 AM
199

My massage therapist told me that her female clients almost always apologize for not having shaved or getting a nice pedi while men show up sweaty and hairy. I hate how American men are pushing grooming as "hygiene." Shaving, nails, hair and make up are grooming, not hygiene. I mainly call out American men because this is not super common in EU (maybe it is bad in Eastern EU).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 02:28 AM
5

As soon as you decide to be exclusive? It blows my mind that Americans can swap bodily fluids and form emotional bonds, but it's too private to inquire about finances? Wut? I got my husband's STD panel, credit report and criminal background check (both FBI and state) as soon I decided I wanted to commit. This was done well before sex or moving in together, I would say at the 2 month mark? If a guy refuses, it would be a deal breaker for me. I took this page from my Indian friend's book. Her fami…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 06:58 AM
0

I mean isn't it your grandfather's fault for choosing to give his heirlooms to his wife? He could have passed it on to his first wife's heirs outside of probate or even in a will? This sub prides itself on being female allies, but you are being bitter about a younger woman and presumably younger niece? It is/was your grandfather's job to provide for his descendants and not the niece's job to decline gifts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 06:47 AM
11

Your post is spot-on! Wealthy women like Oprah are unmarried and will always be that way because they are smart and know the consequences of alimony and step-kid inheritance drama. Why the eff does this woman even need marriage? Make him sign a lease if he wants to live with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 06:42 AM
21

While I appreciate her message, I just can't get over those gnarly filters. It really does take away from her message of being strong and self-confident. Just be yourself and authentic?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 06:25 AM
29

It works for men because they get all the benefits of marriage without the legal hassle. When they decide to walk away, it's easy peasy. As for women, I could maybe understand the house purchase if it was a well-planned and executed transaction involving lawyers, accurate sourcing and recording of down payment, joint tenancy form of ownership, written contract discussing mortgage payment plans etc. I co-own a property with a business partner and we have a very detailed legal agreement. Kids? Oh …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 06:21 AM
12

You can cling to excuses all you want and end up like Grimes, but without fame or money like scores of women scrimping along as broke single moms. I also agree with you that MANY excuses on this sub should never be excuses. If you are making terrible romantic choices at 30, stop and enter therapy. Mentally ill? Also, therapy and meds. Addiction issues? Same. Financial troubles? Get help from a financial advisor about debt management, 2nd jobs and saving plans. Dead end career? Find a mentor in a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/20 02:13 AM
3

It may be your race or it may be the guys you are picking. I recommend therapy to figure out if you have any weird patterns when you pick men. Do you date online? Do you meet guys in person (pre-covid obv)? Do you ask them out? Do you ask for exclusivity or labels? Do you ask for relationship progression (moving in, engagement, marriage etc)? Do you ask to meet his friends or family? If yes to any, STOP. But yes to therapy. Even a few sessions can help you figure out where you are going wrong. I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/20 01:50 AM
16

My opinion? They don't think you are good enough for commitment, I am sorry for sounding harsh. They want you for companionship, sex, chores and therapy, that's it. Just watch when they do end up meeting a "worthy" woman. They lock it down so fast it'll make your head spin. I personally feel that that psycho-analyzing other issues like mommy issues, daddy issues, ego, male fragility, attachment issues etc are simply BS. If he wanted to make you his gf/wife, he would do it in a heartbeat. I have …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 06:09 PM
12

The cringe I feel when I see women cooking, cleaning and keeping a house for losers who can't even "put a label" on their situationship, ugh. No words. Please don't (or do) head to /r/datingover30. A sh*itshow in every way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 06:04 PM
35

She was a 30 yr old musician with money and fame when she started dating Musk. This is not the case of a sheltered 20 yr old just starting out in the music biz. The age difference is not really an excuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 06:00 PM
73

Agreed. Musk's misogyny has been clear for many years now. The way he treated his first wife and the mother of his kids was horrifying and public knowledge. If Grimes, who had money, education and some degree of fame, chose to willingly date and have a baby with a loser like Musk, that's on her. Also, she was 30 when she started dating Musk. I really can't let her blame the age difference. She was a not a young girl being groomed. I am nearly 32 and would laugh if a creepy 49 yr old wanted to ge…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 05:59 PM
18

I will praise both men and women who display this behavior because I don't want this behavior to ever be normalized for women. I want women to be praised and appreciated every time they cook an amazing meal. I want them to be praised when they clean and care for kids. I want "women's work" to become highly valued and these contributions be awarded sufficient praise and worth. If a man exhibits the same behavior, I am happy to offer the same praise BECAUSE I find the work inherently valuable, not…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 07:28 PM
-2

'Ah, the irony of a un/underemployed broke person complaining about "low-income" renters.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 07:49 AM
36

Ah yes, all through history when women worked back breaking labor on farms carrying bales of hay, firewood & produce, washing clothes by hand, getting on their hands and knees to clean and strapping babies to their bosoms while doing it all on limited food. Yup, they had the "classic hourglass" alright.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 04:50 PM
61

The most shocking expectation is not from men, but from other pickme women. When I was single and refused to engage in casual sex, other women would gasp in astonishment and ask "how can you not have sex?" 60 seconds of jackhammer sex with a stranger does not satisfy any sort of sexual or emotional needs in me. I am not risking my health and safety - STD's, pregnancy, rape and violent/degrading sex are risks you take every time you fck a stranger. I need an emotional connection to enjoy sex. No,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/20 10:22 PM
18

Not specifically my life lessons, but worthy nonetheless. Don't abandon your female friends for a man. It's ok to have long periods of singleness. You are not broken. Casual sex will NEVER be as good as loving relationship sex. Stop treating men like bumbling idiots. Ife can't/won't cook, clean and manage the household, bail.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/20 07:37 PM
63

Yup! And the reverse was true for women too. They lived in times when they had 8-15 kids starting early in life, which rapidly depleted your body of nutrients and made women age much faster. The stress/trauma of unmedicated births, difficult pregnancies and years of breastfeeding and raising hellions obviously took a huge toll on their looks. Top off this shit sundae with a shit cherry of their husbands drinking and beating them and voila, the myth of female aging was born!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 09:50 PM
7

So much this! It's beyond fcked up that feminist ideology packages female sexuality to cater to a a male perspective. Why can't women be sexy while wearing normal/modest clothes? Why can't women be sexy "not being a slut?" Why can't women be sexy and and enjoy regular, non-kinky sex? This kind of back and white thinking continues to perpetuate the Madonna/whore complex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 09:34 PM
20

It was shocking for me to hear her speak. She sounds completely uneducated. I really feed bad for child stars, they are exploited by their own parents.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 02:08 AM
25

Her dad was quoted saying that Beyonce is 4 years older than she is and her age was fudged to maker her seem the same age as her Destiny's Child bandmates. Of course, her dad has been disowned by the entire family and may be bitter af, so who knows?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 02:06 AM
5

Because they have time and money and view dating as a hobby? Sure it may take time and effort, but it's fun and good enough until the next fun hobby pops us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 06:26 PM
8

Your friend's situation is fairly common sadly. LVM "dates" a woman wile offering little to no commitment. It usually drags on for years while the man establishes a career and has his fun. Then he decides it's time to settle down, finds a woman who he deems worth of commitment and dumps his forever GF. Then proceeds to date, marry and have kids with the new woman at breakneck speed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 06:25 PM
4

I am married and it's unreal how many married men hit on me and always say "I am married too," as if it's fun for 2 married people to hook up. I always do what you did and talk about their wives and kids. That usually works to ruin their attempts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 05:44 PM
2

That's a pathetic excuse. If you are trauma bonded, hire a therapist to work through those issues. These women can afford daily therapy and anything else needed. If these rich women are afraid of "criticism" that's on them for being weak. The average woman faces criticism for breaking up a home, religious/cultural stigma and so on. Yet countless women are brave enough to leave and take their kids out of a shitty situation. I have ZERO sympathy for women who stay with rapists, especially rich rap…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 05:25 PM
5

Nope. I am an attorney who has worked with celebs and pre-nups are extremely difficult to enforce, especially with celebs where 1 partner makes 99.9% of income. The power imbalance alone can result in pre-nups being tossed. They are usually enforced if 1. both parties are wealthy prior to the wedding and 2. the pre-nup is very fair aka the low/no earning spouse gets a very generous X dollars for each year of marriage. Also, it's illegal to contract child support in pre-nup or ANY agreement. The …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 05:21 PM
82

Agreed. All of the above-mentioned wives would have received large divorce settlements and child support had they left their husbands. Their uncontrolled greed enabled them to stay and that makes them LV women. They are not good examples for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 07:30 PM
31

We don't even need to assume that, Magic has admitted in interviews that he had ton of unprotected sex with hookers and groupies in the height of his fame.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 07:26 PM
48

I mean stylish men carry sleek messenger bags all the time. Basically a murse. Why is a purse so insulting? Because Tomi is a self-hating prick who needs to sh*t on female accessories? SAD.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 07:02 PM
15

It's all good bro. The wife will wise up and review the phone bill to get a full/non-deleteable of his calls. It'll suck for her to slowly morph into a amateur PI, but she will get her answers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 05:42 PM
3

Hell yes to sex before marriage. To me, it's another very important issue to vet. Sexual compatibility does not just mean "good sex," whatever that may be. Is he kind, generous and loving? Does he make sure you are satisfied? Does he appreciate your body or conversely, shame you in anyway? Does he pressure to perform sex acts that you are not comfortable with? Does he have any gender specific sex roles (only women do oral etc)? Does he pressure you to look a certain way wrt body hair, weight etc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 03:52 AM
2

Err only Americans neuter/spay their dogs en masse because the average American is too stupid to properly raise, train, socialize and manage their dogs to avoid aggression and over-population. I grew up in Germany where desexing is illegal. Germany has almost no strays, dog parks are full of intact dogs playing well and people live in dense cities/high rise buildings without fights or accidental breedings. Maybe society should focus on raising their male offspring (both human and animal) right a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 03:26 AM
4

I have never met a woman with healthy self-esteem who gets plastic surgery. You do you, but I would never get it done. Almost always these women hate themselves and think these procedures will get them men or keep their husbands from leaving. Cringe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 03:40 AM
122

My aunt is a plastic surgen in LA and she gets B and C list celebs and tons of wannabe stars. The amount of money spend on treatments and procedures by these women is crazy and they are not even super famous! Fillers everywhere (lips, tear troughs, cheeks, chin), eye brow lift, mini-face lifts, botox, microneedling, chin implants, jaw shaving, forehead reduction! These procedures are painful, expensive and need a lot of upkeep forever. I don't hate myself so much. I am happy to do basic skincare…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 07:58 PM
2

Yes, absolutely! Dated for 1 year before moving in together and lived together for 2 years before getting engaged. Married 6 months after that. This timeline was my requirements and I wasn't ok with speeding up or delaying the milestones. I have posted about this before, but I read an article by a marriage therapist that the 2-3 year mark was a breaking point for many couples and she hypothesized that the honeymoon phase lasts that long. I agreed with her and decided to never marry before the 3 …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:11 PM
7

The forever girlfriend problem is not really a problem if the woman has firm boundaries. Once you move in with your bf, things can go 3 ways. Everything is hunky dory and he proposes based on whatever timeline was discussed. He turns out be an LVM and you bail. There is the stress and expense of breaking a lease/moving your posessions, but worth it. You are seeimgly happy, but he does not propose AKA forever GF. You follow option 2 and leave, as you would leave a non-live in relationship if ther…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:01 AM
8

I know a girl who discovered that her husband was a closet alcoholic and she had no idea despite dating for 4 years!! He started drinking heavily and beating her. She ended up running away while he was at work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 12:49 AM
15

This is garbage. Why would any self-respecting woman sign a fckin legal contract with an LVM, or any man without knowing how day to day life with him is? Men can keep up a facade for years if you only see them a couple times a week. That facade will come crumbling down after a few short months of living. It's also insulting to women who have busted their a$$es to build a successful career and wealth. I am an attorney who was making 6 figures at 24, and I wan't about to pay alimony in a failed ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 11:20 PM
5

It does suck, but just read any dating/mom sub-reddits. Adult men apparently unable to brush their teeth, wipe their a$$, or do their laundry. So gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 12:57 AM
54

Married and very pleased that my husband meets my requirements. Fit and ongoing commitment to fitness. Dark hair - I just love dark haired men. Clear skin - No acne or scarring. Tall-ish - 5' 10 and taller. Trendy dresser - Well fitting clothes and shoes. Well groomed - hygiene is a must (body, feet, teeth, nails and ears), clean shaven, a nice hair cut, nails trimmed, body hair must be trimmed (my husband trims his pits and pubes regularly). Using skin care products. My husband uses moisturizer…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 06:16 PM
4

100% agree with this. Also celeb women who get famous have suffered a ton of abuse and exploitation. Their trauma turns them into pickmes. Feel free to enjoy their music, movies and sports, but look for role models elsewhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:25 AM
16

Nah, I think she did marry for love, not sure if that love is there anymore. Did you see the leaked video of Solange hitting Jay Z in the elevator while B just watched? The anger and emotion displayed by Solange is that of a sister hurting bad for her betrayed sister.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:21 AM
7

It's been a week and he hasn't floated a second date? I would put him in the "tentatively no" category and wait until you are back home. If he doesn't plan a date by then, cut him loose. Also avoid playing pen pals with him and texting mindlessly for weeks. Also beware of dating at work. Even if he is not in the same team, you may need to work with him later, or you may see him physically at work, or he may spread nasty gossip about you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:17 AM
12

Nope, this is dumb af. Engaging with a nasty, unstable man is a bad idea. There are countless stories of road rage ending in death. Just drive away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 06:21 PM
39

Offset also refused to support his previous kids because his ex baby mama turned down his sexual advances (while married to Cardi). He is utter trash and Cardi gloats about her "status" as a married woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 06:18 PM
20

No need to degrade blue collar workers. I know many men in the trades who make excellent money and treat their women like gold. I also know many high prestige men like doctors and lawyers making 6-7 figures and are total LVM. Hot tip - HVM occur in all manner of professions. So do LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 08:47 PM
38

This is why I won't shut up about women building and nurturing a solid network of female friends and mentors. I am married to a HVM, but I will never assume that he will stay HV forever. I spend a lot of time and effort in cultivating female friendships and it's disappointing when so many women simply fade away from our groups and tell me that they prefer to "focus on their husband and kids." Yes, it's important to focus on your family, but not at the expense of your individual relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:11 PM
39

From 2005-2015 ish, anal sex was THE thing for a lot of guys. Like 90% of guys would try to ask for anal right off the bat. Even during my mild pickme days, that was a dealbreaker. I was venting to my girlfriends about this and I was shamed for not wanting anal. Apparently it was "totally ok and normal" and sexually liberated women would be up for it. Refusing a painful sex act was prudish. Well those same women are now all about rough sex. Some women will never learn. They are willing to ensure…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 01:51 AM
9

I guess it's totally ok for me to blame "wimminz biology" for my behavior too? I mean I am hardwired to pick a mate who will provide for me and my offspring, so I need to look for the richest guy I can find? I should make men physically fight over me and brutally reject the loser because I also need a man who is physically strong/fit to protect my delicate self. If my mate starts slacking in the money/fitness requirements, I can find a replacement and have the new mate get rid of the failing spo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 05:04 PM
9

"Shallow" is a slur used to shame women into not having standards. If you want a fit guy, a successful guy or a guy without baggage (no kids, no addiction issues etc), then go for it. It's NOT your job to take on projects.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:54 PM
26

I always recommend a direct, but polite approach. Something like "I have to go, goodbye." Take your stuff and walk out. I was raised in Germany, so being direct is a cornerstone of our culture. But I also understand that not everyone is ok with being direct. If you need to invent an excuse, don't feel guilty. Look at your phone and say "oh no, my [friend/roommate/sibling/pet] has a [flat tire/sick/puking/needs me]. I have to go. Don't wait for permission, just spit out your line and leave. Do pr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:41 PM
12

" I decided that we are only temporarily separated and I'll go right back home after my dalliance with my side piece."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:33 PM
28

Mommy issues will be magnified 1000 times if you date/marry a guy from a traditional culture. Unfortunately, even to this day, most cultures are "traditional." Outside of the US, Canada, UK, Western and Northern Europe and Australia, most cultures have messed up mommy-son entanglements, especially the first born or only son. I am married to a Russian man, but he only reason I dated him was because he was very americanized and wouldn't take his parents' highly sexist BS. He also recognized his to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 12:21 AM
4

I read an article by a marriage therapist many years ago where she claimed that the "honeymoon phase" actually lasts 1.5 to 3 years for men. She wasn't talking about the lovey-dovey feelings, but rather the need to appear like your dream man so that they can reel you in. I really connected with her words and made a decision to never marry or even get engaged before the 3 year mark. What do you know! My exes always turned into a-holes at the 2 to 2.5 yr mark like clockwork. I knew my husband was …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 03:25 AM
3

If he is feeling sad/lonely/insecure/missing his ex after 1 whole year of being with you, then he is just stringing you along. Move on girl!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 03:19 AM
85

These same men will blow a gasket if the the racism is returned to them! My Asian friend matched (swiped?) with a black guy whose bio also had the line "no black girls." She was so pissed that she responded with "I don't date black guys" just to give him a dose of his own medicine and man, he lost it! A barrage of nasty messages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 03:03 AM
9

Yes! Preach! Women need to stop feeling guilty and blaming their products for their lower socio-economic status. Nope, your shampoo is not making you broke. It's because women are pushed towards lower paying majors (Wimmin not good at math and science), they get lower pay for the same positions, they are not taught/encouraged to negotiate their salaries, get lower bonuses and fewer promotions, get penalized for child/elder care obligations, get screwed over if they get pregnant too often, exclud…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 04:04 AM
1

Agree with you! I always picked one of 4 coffee shops all within walking distance to my place. I knew the baristas, the menu, my favorite drinks and my table of choice. My husband dislikes phone calls and video calls. He would be happy to do it if I had requested it, but it would have been awkward as hell and I would have declined a real date. I am super glad that we met up in person instead. Another benefit is that I didn't have to deal with driving/parking, didn't have to pay for uber, also av…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 12:27 AM
7

I disagree with the guidebook about this. I need to meet people IRL to gauge baseline chemistry. Also, you simply cannot get a pulse on people on a screen. Whether it's making friends, dating or business networking, I prefer to meet IRL for a quick coffee. It worked out for me, so I am sticking to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:34 PM
5

Yes! I always suggested a coffee date at a coffee shop close to my house. Guys always suggested drinks/happy hour, but again, not gonna drink alcohol with a rando at some unknown bar. I would decline drinks and suggest coffee instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 08:45 PM
17

I personally don't think it's bad to start off with a coffee date. It was my default (by choice) when I was dating. Reasons: I hated meeting strange guys at night. I didn't want to be trapped in a fancy restaurant with a boring/nasty guy. I didn't want to dress to the nines/do hair and make-up for a first date. I used to live in NYC and LA and it was common to be all dressed up to go to a fancy joint. I preferred a minimal time commitment for the first date. I am not spending 2-3 hours with some…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 08:16 PM
10

I know people hate KK, but I have worked with several A list celebs in my previous career and Kim K was undoubtedly the NICEST celeb I have ever met. She is also pretty darn business savvy. I wish she had a better mother who raised her better. She is definitely a pickme who goes for LVM and is insecure about other female celebs. But in terms of being nice to people, she was wonderful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 12:28 AM
26

Yup! Also want to add Hindu Goddess Kali who beheaded and danced on the headless corpse of the man who wronged her. She also collected and made a garland of the skulls of men who treated her badly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 01:49 AM
10

100% agree with this. I have been with my HV husband for 10 happy years now (6 married) and I still tell people that marriage is not the end goal. Single & thriving > married & miserable. I have so many married female friends who are so so unhappy, but still wear marriage as a badge of honor to gloat over single women. Don't fall for their pathetic show of faux superiority. An unhappy marriage will suck the life/soul/joy out of a woman's life. It's totally fine to seek out love, romance and marr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 01:20 AM
13

There are pics of Orlando canoodling with Selena Gomez and some Brazilian model while he was dating Katy. It was widely speculated that he dumped Katy to sleep around with other women. This is something I 100% believe is true because I have met/worked with Orlando (while he was married to Miranda Kerr) and that man has a roving eye like none other!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:07 AM
6

Nope, there was a recent article where Katy talks about being heart broken when Orlando dumped her during break up 1. There are pics of him canoodling with Selena Gomez and a brazilian model while he was with Katy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:04 AM
24

Celebrity women in general are massive pickmes. Maybe the trauma of being exploited in Hollywood? Who knows. Young women need to stop looking up to them as role models. Julia Roberts bribing her married lover's wife to divorce him, Katy Perry taking back Orlando Bloom who cheated/dumped her and getting pregnant by him w/o marriage, Beyonce, the Kardashians etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 03:33 AM
8

Shitty people are fully aware of their shitty behavior and you do not owe them an explanation. Doesn't matter if they are a SO/friend/family member/client etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 02:28 AM
3

A man should have been molded into a decent man, husband and father by his parents. If he lacked parental influence, it's on him to seek out mentor and therapy to become such a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 02:26 AM
10

There was a an article by the Bill & Melinda Gates foundation that cited access to birth control as the single greatest positive impact impact for women all over the world. I can't find the study/article, but it basically said that a woman who controls the number and timing of her children has a significantly better outcome in life in every metric - health, money, state of marriage, whether or not she earns her own income, her kids' futures etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 03:33 AM
5

The Catholic church must take responsibility in Latin America for brutally imposing religion through their money and power. My best friend (doctor) volunteered in Brazil and Philippines specifically for women's health and the church did everything in its power to dissuade women from using birth control. At one point, the clinic giving out free shots was trashed by people in league with the local Catholic church. Abortions? Phew! My friend commented that it might be easier to kill a child than ge…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 03:29 AM
45

Hmm let's compare two women who live on my street. W1 is 50, divorced and a mom of 2. She was with her ex from 25-45, quit her job and was a typical suburban helicopter mom. She had 0 friends and her life revolved around her kids, husband and running her home. Her ex had an affair 5 yrs ago and left her. She is ok financially since we live in a community property state and she got half of their assets, but socially she is super lonely. Her parents are dead and her sister lives far away. She is d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 11:11 PM
2

Ah gotta love religious LV/NV men who can't handle criticism for their poor choices. "Only God can judge me" so please stop slinging criticism at me! Will soon be followed by "God will forgive" aka I can do whatever I can and treat you however I want, muh God will set it right in the end.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:34 AM
7

I find that many younger men are raised to be that way by their parents, especially LV mothers. Usually the moms fall into 2 categories: They bought into libfem ideology hardcore and raised their sons that women need to pay their own way, always have a a job etc. They are traditional, but misogynistic and hate younger women. Especially women to "steal" their precious boys and take them away from mama. They think every woman is out to rob their baby boy and raise their sons to always "beware" of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:29 AM
8

I take my dog to a swim in a doggy pool on farm only 40 min from me. I pack plenty of separate, fresh water for me and him, snacks for both of us, ear wash solution for him, towels, extra clothes in case I get splashed on and even a blow dryer for the winter months so he's not too cold. I also keep my phone fully charged in case of an emergency. Somehow this adult male who is a dad, can't pack the basics for dropping off his own child? What if the kid was hungry/thirsty/had an accident in the 3 …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 02:38 AM
9

100% agree with your distinction and I believe this should apply to other hobbies as well. My husband likes to play video games to relax and more importantly, catch up with his college buddies, who are living all over the US. I have 0 issues with this because of the following: His gaming does not affect daily life - he works, cooks, cleans and takes the dog out. He doesn't neglect his responsibilities. He also doesn't neglect hygiene, sleep, exercise or sex. If there is a change in our schedule …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/20 10:36 PM
1

I maintain that it's better that a shitty bf/husband leave rather than stay and chip away at the woman's self esteem. I know so many pickmes who diet unhealthily and get lipo just to satisfy their men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/20 08:31 PM
2

Yeah! The judge equated it to a spouse supporting a SAHP, helping a spouse open a business etc It was a choice to "help the family unit."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 12:33 AM
1

Oh it gets better, he married the nurse and cheated on her with his receptionist! Wife #2 (nurse) was the one who hired the receptionist! At least Wife 2 made out very well! She didn't support him financially and he got a very high paying surgeon job right after the wedding, so her divorce payout was quite generous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 12:32 AM
124

Such a common story! My former boss worked as a teacher and put her husband through med school. This was in the 90's when tuition was lower, but she still worked 2 other jobs (bartending for tips and tutoring HS kids) to support both of them. He spun shiny fantasies of her quitting after he completed residency, having kids, staying home and enjoying a doctor's paycheck. Well, in his final year of surgical residency, he cheated and left to be with a nurse. Despite 10+ of years of marriage, their …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 08:45 PM
6

My husband is Russian-American, and having years of interaction with Russian women, the "male breadwinner" mentality is very common, but almost never works out for these women. Not being snarky, I am genuinely sad for these women who have deal with so many LVM. The women end up in 4 common situations. They stick to their guns and end up in their 40's and 50's single, but working low-paid jobs, cramming in tiny apartments with roommates etc. They hit 30 and get desperate and marry a LV/NV male an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 05:40 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter