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hairwashernova Archive

View 8 posts and 97 comments by hairwashernova on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
368

REMINDER 👑hairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:11 PM
161

#JustLVMThingshairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 01:28 PM
116

#JustLVMThingshairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 07:30 PM
1

Story time ☕hairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 04:47 AM
1

DISCUSSIONhairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 06:46 PM
1

MINDSET SHIFThairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 08:04 PM
1

RANThairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 02:53 PM
1

MINDSET SHIFThairwashernova/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/21 09:39 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
90

I hope she leaves soon ): This is why I will never date a gamer. Their addiction runs deeper than most people want to believe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 01:34 AM
6

You're more than welcome to come to my Asian community and date any of them to make them feel better lol. That Pickmeisha label is perfect for the men around here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 10:06 PM
7

You got all that from this post? Lol. I only mentioned their race because the only men who have given me a hard time for dating tall men (and outside my own race) are the short Asian men in my community. I have no problem dating Asian men if they would grow some backbone and ask me out instead of trying to neg me for not dating them. But hey, good on ya for dating some tall creme de la creme Asian men! Whoo!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 09:56 PM
8

I think romance books, movies and the media skewed my reasonable and logical side when it came to the military, not gonna lie. I grew up reading about and hearing how heroic, brave and strong they were so I began fantasizing about men in the military at a young age. It wasn't until I chatted with some, was lead on by a few and dated one that the bubble was bursted. I can't even imagined what you've seen IRL when it comes to them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 09:26 PM
44

I don't care about Dr. Phil now but when I was a teenager I used to watch him and Oprah all the time while I was doing homework. (I was a strange teen lol.) And one thing that always stuck with me was what he said about marriage. Something along the line of, "You want to put 100% into a marriage and you also want to marry someone who also put 100% into the marriage. Not have it 50/50." It impacted me even as a teen and after 15 years or so, now that I'm in my 30s, I can understand what he was sa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 06:40 PM
40

There was a post on there asking why the women of FDS were so bitter a while back and the comments had me rolling my eyes. Just a lot of pick-mes begging to be chosen by low effort men. And God forbid if you tell someone to leave their relationship cause the only right thing to say on there is: "YOU, as a woman, need to COMMUNICATE with him MORE despite YOU, the woman, always putting yourself on the line. Communication is KEY!!!!!!" Ugh. Total joke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 06:31 PM
23

Eh, I don't wanna do that because it mostly leads to sex lol. I'm pretty sure I'll think of something creative in the future.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 06:25 PM
22

Well, height was never a thing I cared about until I started dating lol. It was then that my eyes opened to how weird these guys are. They're in a mental warzone with other men regarding the stature of dick and height sizes. I didn't go out of my way to date tall guys and it just happened but I'm definitely rethinking about it in the future. No one under 5'10 allowed near me lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 05:15 PM
34

It's funny cause these short guys never even talked to me before or even expressed interests in me until I started dating men who happened to be tall. And I knew most of them for years. I'm pretty sure they don't even noticed I existed either. If they had asked me out, I most likely wouldn't had rejected them but to ask me out when I was dating someone else? Talk about being insecure. Height is not a big deal to me personally but maybe it should be lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 04:47 PM
126

This but mainly with height when it comes to me. I'm Asian and also pretty short (5'2). All the men I've dated were (white) and either 5'10 or taller. I've gotten so many angry rants about me not giving shorter men a chance or if I was too good to date short guys. And these all came from short angry Asian men lol. I told one guy before that if he had the balls to come up to me and asked me out (when I was single), I would probably given him a chance but he clearly needed anger management for his…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 04:10 PM
103

I had to unsubscribe from there and r/AskWomen because they're just filled with men who thinks they know more than women. Women agreeing with or flattering men gets a lot of praises but women disagreeing with men or even showing a hint of backbone gets you down-voted like no tomorrow. Good riddance to those places really.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 04:02 PM
86

There was a tweet quoting this one that said something along the lines of, "3 months after listening to Steve Harvey's advice" and not gonna lie, I did chuckle a bit lol. I'm all for no sex until commitment and the whole 6 months rule but still...there has to be a way to find out how big the carrot is beforehand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:58 PM
20

I've chatted with my fair shares of military men and they're pretty much all the same. They're not ready to settle down despite saying they are or they're all in open relationships. I'm not dating anymore but when I start again, I'm avoiding anyone who even whispers, "I'm in the mil--" Nope! Bye boy! Lol. And yep, exactly. It felt like I was dating the wife too. My ex avoided telling his STBXW that we were together, avoided changing his status on FB from married to single/in a relationship and w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:40 PM
87

This!!! Ladies, please follow this advice to the T!!! Once, I dated and was falling in love with guy who was separated from his wife and was going through the process of divorcing her. So that meant I was part of their drama. He was still paying for her phone bills and she lived in their house while he was on base. He really wasn't ready to be in a committed relationship because he ended up asking me to partake in a open relationship where he would get to screw other women and I had to just go a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:15 PM
6

My frist (now ex) boyfriend and I were discussing our past and he mentioned his first girlfriend who had cheated on him with his best friend. The way he talked about her, saying how he was still angry at her and how he had loved her...it made me realized he wasn't over her and he was 31 freaking years old while this relationship took place when he was 17. This was one of the reasons why I broke up with him. It's not your job to fix him. The moment he shows you that he's not over some other woman…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 11:47 AM
17

Lmao. I get called a prude for not wanting to have sex with some lowlife loser but I also get called a slut for not putting up too. So what's the truth? Dumbasses. Men will guilt you and manipulate you for sex regardless of how you feel so best to kick them to the curb the moment they do. They refuse to understand that the women of FDS can have any guy they want and most of us would be in relationships/marriages by now if we didn't had standards and respect for ourselves to know that we deserve …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 11:35 AM
6

That's just gross 🤮 One of the reasons why I'm not on OLD anymore. Littered with men who just wanna have meaningless hook-ups and the occasional threesomes and have their kinks be fulfilled. I'd rather be walking on hot coals.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:29 AM
8

Both. Men fear that we're men pretending to be women in order to get money/gift cards from them. They also think we're women pretending to be "hotter" women for money too. So essentially, they think we're all fake lol. Honestly, if I was trying to get money from people I would not be wasting my time on the men on OKCupid and Tinder. There are better options than that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:26 AM
11

I have 5 photos I took for OLD and I don't use them for anything else so guys can't trace them back to my social media accounts (that I barely use anyways.) So I hate it when guys asks for more photos because I already provided 5. If they're so scared about being "tricked" then wonder how we (women) feel about being lured into an unwanted situations because of insecure men. I'm already exhausted being me to be catfishing as someone else and to be quite frankly, I don't need to. I like the way I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:07 AM
7

Exactly why I wrote females twice there lol. These types of women call other women, "females" which is pretty much mimicking the way men sees/talks about us. Pretty sad but not surprising.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 01:35 AM
22

I believe that 100%. And if they're "real" then they use photos from 10+ years ago as if that's not gonna be noticeable in face-to-face meetings lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 01:17 AM
90

Against my better judgment, I went and looked up the post. His account is riddled with posts demeaning his wife where he's just complaining about her and pretty much emotionally and mentally abusing her. He says he's not a troll but whatever, I hope she leaves his ugly ass and takes him to the cleaners for everything he's got.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 01:06 AM
73

I got asked to "show proof" that I was real and was not a catfish all the time when I was on OLD apps. It got so annoying cause why do I need to prove anything? If you want to meet up to see that I am whom I say I am then set up a formal date but then again, men want everything handed to them easily. A major turn off. Maybe they're the catfish lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 01:03 AM
9

I am so sorry this happened to you. I've been where you've been. Please don't apologize for not knowing any better and try to get to a safe place ASAP. The best thing you can do is go get checked out to make sure your bruises aren't life threatening. (Even if it was a while ago, a check-up is good for you anyways.) Then tell someone you trust about what happened and see if you can stay with them for the time being. After going thru what you did, you'll need all the support you can get. Please, p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 11:15 PM
37

I used to stay up til sunrise talking to men. Where are they now? Who the fuck knows lol. I have most of them blocked. I don't message anyone (except family) after 10 pm anymore. That's my sleeping time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 11:08 PM
24

Exactly. "No drama" and to just check "the vibes with you." All phrases for wanting sex but without any effort. I see a lot of men also have their motorcycles or cars as their profile pics too. Like, what are they trying to hide or cover up? Their ugliness? Lol. Men thinks women shouldn't care about how they look like but will be the first to comment how beautiful or sexy or cute you are, as if that wasn't the only reason why they wanted to talk with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 08:25 PM
17

It's as if he's expecting her to jump up and down with glee over a low effort sex session offer. Men are so stupid lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 08:16 PM
19

What a douchecanoe. Fuck that dude lol. My friend at first tried to be nice and tell these losers, "No thanks'" but they always followed up with, "Are you a prude?" and "Come on, lemme fuck you." Their true colors always come out the moment they get rejected. Disgusting asswipes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 08:14 PM
11

Just gross AF 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 08:03 PM
27

One of my friend's most hated word is cuddle (low effort keyword) and she got hit with 3 of them this morning. Men just need to come out and say they want sex, point blank.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 08:02 PM
57

He also doesn't have any photos of himself on his profile and didn't even bothered to answer any of the basics questions (height, hair and eye colors, About Me section) so we most definitely have a LVM Bingo here. Lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 07:59 PM
41

She's the type of woman who goes, "I'm just like one of the boys and I'm not like other females. And I don't have female friends because they're too dramatic." Yea, okay lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 07:56 PM
67

Oh yea, for sure. I used to react negatively to men's depraved questions but now I just link them to Grindr or the International Therapist Directory before blocking them. They're just looking for a way to worm their way into our lives. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 07:34 PM
217

I had a guy asked me this recently and I just linked him to Grindr's website lol. If you wanna play that shit then do it with ya boys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 07:19 PM
18

Very true, thank you for this. I'm still learning to accept this mind shift, to not berate myself over failed relationships with the men I chose to get involved with. I think it's hard, especially when you have friends and/or family members, who tell you things like, "Why did you chose him of all men" and "I can't believe YOU fell for him and let him broke YOUR heart, LMAO." Shit like that eats at your self-worth, not gonna lie. I'm learning to stand up for myself and drawing a line with the bou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 05:43 PM
4

Shitty dating experiences and lots of OLD interactions has sadly made me realized what type of men I don't want for the most part lol. One of my therapist suggested I did this after my last heartbreak: 1 - Watch a movie (romance, rom com, action, etc.) or read a romance book. 2 - Take notes of what the "Hero" does/say to the "Heroine" or his friends that you want for your next partner. Who/what traits are you drawn to? 3 - Take notes of what the "Hero" does/say to the "Heroine" or his friends th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 04:46 PM
16

From my experience, no. Personally, I can't be friends with a man because I always end up either having feelings for them or realizing that the things I tell them are too personal and should only be told to the man I'm in a relationship with. Or, the most common thing is that they end up saying sexual stuff and try to coerce me into a relationship when I'm not the least bit attracted to them at all. Everyone is different though. When I was dating my exes, I didn't talk to other men even when the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 04:09 PM
6

I need to start making that list for myself lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 01:27 AM
16

Snapchat is for nudes. How do I know this? From past experience lol. The only men who uses Snapchat are those who are wanting to sext and will ask for nude videos. End of discussion. I just deleted my Snapchat after a few months of not using it and I will never use it again nor talk to anyone who asks to move to Snapchat instead of asking for my phone number. Save yourself ths trouble and pass on this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 01:25 AM
4

In my first relationship, I knew it was over 2 weeks before I actually broke it off but I didn't know how to react to what I was feeling because it was the first time I felt that way. I pulled back and was already mourning the end before it actually ended. I'd say journal how you feel and allow yourself to feel everything that comes up and don't try to choke them down. I think our inner being knows when we're ready to leave more than we think. After I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, I cried so mu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 06:08 PM
33

I admit I used to take nudes but I never had my faces in them which is the only reason why I don't care now if they leak. My ex-boyfriends have them along with the guys I used to sext but only one of my ex-boyfriend knows my address or full name. And he's computer illiterate so I'm not too worried. That being said I would never send nudes again, not even for a husband. I deleted all of them off my phone and this post reminded me that I need to delete my Snapchat too. I cringe every time I think …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 05:57 PM
105

My friend is currently on OLD and she sends me screenshots of every weirdo who treats her like a fuck toy. My friend is gorgeous and very smart but she has all these ugly toads begging her to be their new fuck buddy, asking her why she won't give them a chance and if she thinks she's too good for them. Hell yes she is. While all the hot, great-looking guys always ask her how she's doing and asks her about the hobbies she wrote down on her account. They don't drool over her looks and actually act…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 05:46 PM
35

This. There have been times (especially recently) when I would start to miss my horrible exes and the guy I hooked up with who sucked at sex. I would begin to fantasize about them despite knowing how bad those situations were for me, wanting to get in contact with them again and wondering what they were doing. Then I would get super emotional and regret saying goodbye to them, hoping they would call me. It got so bad that I'd start looking through old texts, hoping to see our old conversations. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 11:34 AM
5

You put into words what I was feeling. My therapist pointed out that I had the tendency to get attached to men who lived in other states or countries more than the ones who lived near me. It was something I didn't even realized until she mentioned it. We figured that as a way to protect myself, I had unconsciously began to seek out unavailable men from other states/countries because they couldn't hurt me physically. However the ones who were long distanced were able to hurt me emotionally becaus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 12:27 AM
16

I totally get that. You had that connection, from the sex and conversations, and to find out he only sees you as a friend can be a blow. You get all these thoughts in your head. Is that the only thing you're good for? Why doesn't he see you as more? Just messes with your head, ego and confidence sadly. I've been there before, kinda. I had a friend last year who I was close to. We started off with phone sex and sexting but later found out we had a ton of things in common. We would chat from sunse…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:38 PM
57

I think a lot of women believe that they have to follow FDS rules to the T and if they don't, they're a failure at life. Always seem like we're forgetting something else--that we're only humans. Humans who have emotions and feelings. Humans who do shit their way regardless of knowing FDS rules and what not lol. Humans who learn from their past and don't repeat it in the future. It gets easier to apply the FDS standards into our lives after a while but you shouldn't be so hard on yourself either.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:01 PM
11

That's good then. Yea, I get that. I have insomnia so I do most of my commenting at night or early mornings when I'm still awake. FDS is a great, awesome place for women but sometimes we do need to step back for a while because it can get overwhelming. I think with more women becoming a lot stronger and not putting up with shit anymore, a lot of their stories are coming out after finding safe haven in FDS. It's like a never ending wave and I'm glad for it but it's also saddening at the same time…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 06:25 AM
18

I am so sorry :( He's such a selfish asshole and you deserve so much better. I think it's easier to leave at the beginning of a relationship than it is to leave after a year or so. Those red flags are so easy to ignore when you want to believe in someone so bad. I've been there, I understand. That being said, to lead someone on for one a half year and abandoned them at their time of need, saying they never loved you is just horrible. And him using the whole "can't have my future kids" excuse is …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 05:56 AM
104

A few months ago, I got into it with a loser on Reddit about this very topic. I can't remember the entire conversation but the gist of it was that he said he would leave his girlfriend/wife the moment they got sick/hurt. I called him a selfish prick and said that he should tell his future partner so they won't stay with someone like him. He then told me his girlfriend knew this about him and was okay with it. WTF. Even at my worst, I would had never stayed with a guy who would abandoned me as so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 05:27 AM
31

I joined FDS about over a month and a half ago right before my 31st birthday. I was crying my heart out over a bunch of losers who ghosted me and chasing men for affection like a dummy when I saw a post on here that made me opened my eyes. "Stop asking yourself why it didn't work out with a piece of shit guy and ask yourself WTF you were missing in your life that made you so attracted to a trash bag in the first place." It hit me that while I was lonely, sad and felt abandoned after a guy ghoste…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 02:43 AM
66

I've walked out on a few dates before but the most memorable one was from last fall. Ah, the memories lol. He was older than me by about 10 years so he was around 39-40 years old. We met at this nice little "biker" bar/pub downtown and right away he seemed alright. Polite, nice smile, greeted me as soon as I walked in and was pretty happy. That was, until he has a few drinks in. He was drinking whiskey and doing shots while I was nursing a coke because I don't drink and drive, ever. After his 4t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 09:08 AM
24

OLD apps and abstinence really don't go together unfortunately. I've been on and off of there for 4 years now and it always end up with the guys wanting sex. Doesn't matter if it's a week down the road, a month, a few months. And if they don't get sex, they ghost. Sometimes, rarely, they do work out but sex will always be an obstacle. Someone I know met her boyfriend on Tinder and they're still together after 5 years BUT they had sex within the first week. They started officially dating a week l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:11 AM
9

I'm the same way. Compliments makes me uncomfortable. I grew up thinking I was ugly and with people calling me ugly. I spent my teenage years and early 20s covered in sweaters, long sleeved shirts and jeans even in the hot summer months because of it. It wasn't until the past few years that I embraced I am pretty, super cute and very charming. I get attention when I dress up and when I put effort into my looks because I'm usually in sweats, leggings and comfy t-shirts. However, I also know that …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 02:04 AM
113

Lol, most guys who comment about how beautiful/gorgeous you are right off the bat usually can only talk about your looks and how they wanna smash. That's why I tend to avoid them cause our conversations always end up like this. Overall, what a weird and abrupt transition.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 01:43 AM
6

Ah, wow. We were wondering what that meant but he wasn't making much sense anyways so we chalked it up to him wanting to make fast friends lol. That's even sadder and more disgusting now that I know it's a drug reference.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 08:04 PM
7

I check out the moment they use the words vibesssss and chill. Language of LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 06:04 PM
11

Tell me about it. OLD has made me hate the words: chill, hang-out, vibes, and relax. It just screams low effort and not looking for anything but casual sex. Blegh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 05:48 PM
38

It's definitely a bait thing. They ask to be "friends" cause they're too much of a coward to say what they really want is someone to be at their beck and call for sex, but to also be their therapist and support group. I met a lot of guys like this when I was on OLD and they're all the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:29 PM
48

He looks like a fisherman who has been out at seas too long, hadn't bathe in months and forgot to put on sunscreen lol. So unattractive and they think they can get with any woman while being this idiotic. What he really meant was "hang-out with my dick" and be my FWB while also being my emotional support maid. Disgusting. Yes to more truth bombs!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:15 PM
12

You and me both.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:00 PM
76

I got her into FDS too and we're working on not apologizing when rejecting men lol. It's sad how ingrained it is for women to say "sorry" even when we're not. I told her she should just block next time but she was pissed off at his audacity so 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 01:59 PM
3

Thank you, I am too. I skimmed that book years ago but I'll try to see if I can get a copy from Amazon or online.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 08:20 PM
41

Yup, that's the one lol. I think it's one of the reason why I always question the men I talk to now and view them in a different light. Like yea, they seem fun to be around and act kind but would they drop everything to help me in the middle of the night after I sleep with them? Most likely not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 06:36 PM
169

I saw a post on Twitter a while back where a woman was talking about how her brother had to come help her when her car broke down or something. Her brother told her that none of the men she was chatting with/sleeping with even bothered to show up to help her so she needed to drop them. It was one of those posts that stayed in the back of my mind but didn't hit until FDS. Because it's true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 06:29 PM
9

I think this was the first time I talked with a narcissistic psychopath. I've watched a lot of serial killer documentaries and he really reminded me of Ted Bundy which was probably why I was so uncomfortable even looking at his photo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:24 PM
6

I really did, in hindsight. I've felt unease with men before but this was the first time everything in my body was screaming big red flags because of one, and it wasn't even a face-to-face meeting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:21 PM
45

Recently I experienced the "women's intuition." I was on OLD and met James, a businessman. We chatted a bit but within an hour, my gut was telling me that there was something wrong and disturbing with this guy. It was confirmed (that my feelings were correct) when he changed his profile and background pic on his account. He had put his dick in the background but what was more disturbing was the new photo of HIM. His eyes were cold and dead. He reminded me of Ted Bundy. Charming, handsome but tho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 09:12 AM
7

This sounds like my first ex-boyfriend. Everything, especially the "I went too fast" message. I broke up with my ex-boyfriend after he kept pushing my sexual boundaries and doing things I was not comfortable with. This man will most likely do the same, if given the chance. And reading this now has made me realized how immature they both sound. Block him before you invest too much in him like I did my ex-boyfriend. Good for you for calling him out. I wished I had done that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 11:40 PM
18

I'm 31 years old and lost my virginity this year. To a hook-up. After the second time of hooking up with a stranger and him leaving the bed after orgasming to go sit on his couch to be on his phone while I get dressed, I realized how much I wished I was in a loving relationship. I wanted to cuddle and talk and just BE with someone after sex, not get dressed and leave his house afterwards. Everyone told me I should have more sex with men now that I'm single and for a while, I thought I should had…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 05:34 PM
6

As someone who used to sext strangers a lot during my pick me era, I applaud you for standing up for your standards. I have had this happened to me before, (and even recently) when I refuse to sext someone because I don't do that with men I'm not committed to anymore. Conversations would be flowing, the humor would be there and the spark is amazing but the moment they want to start sexting or sharing intimate details about their penis or send nudes, I learned the best thing to do is this. Tell t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 12:13 AM
18

Geesh, all the examples you told are sad. I feel so sorry for your friends. I admit that I always wanted to live with someone before I married them but after FDS, I know now that I will never agree to live with a man until I have a ring on my finger and he's my husband. I want commitment and like you said, most guys lose interests once you cohabit together.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:40 PM
5

It's...the Dollar Tree store lol. If you're gonna go 50-50 at a dollar store, or the guy doesn't even reach for his wallet then you might as well run now, especially if it's with someone you're not even living with. It's funny cause whenever I go shopping with my brothers at the stores, no matter where it is, they always pay for my things and never ask for anything back. Of course, I usually do pay them back but it's the thought that counts. I may still be learning but I definitely know how a HV…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:29 PM
33

"Start from forward and see what happens" ??? Is that what he's saying lol. I absolutely hate it when people, especially men, on dating sites text like this. It's a major turn off and I automatically check out the moment I read this kind of shit. If I'm forever questioning what the heck you're saying then I'd rather stay single.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 10:59 AM
3

You're welcome! The YouTuber has a tendency to ramble a lot but she gives out so much good advice that I don't even mind lol. Free therapy sessions for those who can't afford it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 05:22 AM
3

I hate it too and it used to hurt me (and still does, sadly) so much when they show me lots of attention in the beginning but once they feel like I was more into them than they were to me, they would start to cool off. I'm not going to pretend to be someone I'm not anymore and walking away from someone who says one thing then don't follow up has helped me in seeing my own worth. No more indeed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 05:17 AM
21

Yes to this!!! My therapist suggested I explored what my attachment style was after my failed relationships and turned out that I had "Fearful Avoidant Attachment." Which means I'm constantly wanting love but at the same time, I'm afraid of being loved. Or being wanted. Hot and cold. Knowing this has helped me understand myself and my past more, and the men I'm drawn to. I recommend this YouTube channel for anyone who wants to learn more about Attachment Styles. It was helped me a lot. https://w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 03:29 AM
21

I used to be scared of blocking people. It's that mindset of them thinking they "won" when you block them but after therapy and much needed mental growth, I now block people with ease when they no longer are good for me. I blocked my first ex-boyfriend one month after the break-up and it was hard for me because I was so heartbroken. What made me realized I needed to do it was when I accidentally butt dialed an old acquaintance of mine and my mind instantly thought, "OMG. If that was ex-boyfriend…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 03:21 AM
10

Ah, something almost like this happened to me this week lol. I met a guy on OLD a few weeks back. He was very attentive and was messaging me almost every single day. He lives in Hawaii and is moving back home next week so he's been busy and I understood that but all of a sudden, he stopped texting me. Last Thursday, after a few days of silence, I (also hindsight dumb move) texted him, asking him how he was. I kid you not, less than 5 minutes after that text, he messaged me back and was like, "Th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 03:04 AM
24

I used to only go for older men when I was younger because I fell into that "older men are more experienced and know what they want" crap which is complete bullshit lol. Then as I got older, I would refused to chat with any guy who was more than a few years younger than me because of the stigma of an "older cougar going for a younger man." I'm 31 now and after 3-4 years of dating, I learned that age really isn't a factor or indication in knowing whether or not a man will be mature or decent. It …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 05:37 PM
7

I'm so sorry that happened to you. Truly. It sucks and you have every reason to feel hurt. I'm going to be honest, it'll take a while to heal but you can grow stronger and move on from this. If that's what you want. Long story short, my second ex-boyfriend love bombed me for weeks. Did pretty much what your ex did. He did everything right, said the most perfect and convincing things to me to break down my barriers and when I fell for him...all of a sudden he changed. He started telling me that I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 07:53 AM
23

Yep! Pretty much lol. I don't have much of a butt but I have huge natural breasts so it's the first thing men notice and sometimes sadly, the only thing they notice and can talk about. I'll ask them about their hobbies and they'll always manage to bring it back to my bra size and "It's so sexy to see a small Asian woman with huge boobs 😍." Alrighty then. And the amount of times I've been asked to be choked! What's up with that?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 02:09 AM
64

I'm Asian and have chatted with men with this mind set before. Sadly, it is not rare and most white guys who message me just want someone who is obedient, shy and quiet. They think it's so "sexy" that I'm a petite and curvy Asian woman but never ask me about my interests or hobbies. Barf lol. They always seem to stop responding back when I outsmart them and call them out on their bullshit. Sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 09:05 PM
28

Let me just say that your feelings are valid and I empathize with what you're going through. I'm not dating or trying to at the moment however, I have been the "options" woman for someone who couldn't decide if he wanted to be with me or if he wanted to be with several other women too (at the same time!!!) You're somewhat lucky that you found out within the first date too. My ex asked me to be his girlfriend and told me he wanted a monogamous, exclusive relationship, to only changed his mind a m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 06:49 AM
11

Yup, you nailed it there. We could talk about his problems but when it came to me, all of a sudden he was too busy or he didn't want to listen because it was "too much" since I apparently had too many issues lol. What he really just wanted was for me to be his therapist and nod my head at whatever he said. God, I'm so glad I woke up. And thank you! The silver lining about being with him was that he was the guy who made me snapped out of my pick me ways because I realized I deserved better than t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 02:50 AM
2

I'm so glad this helped you, even if a little. I told another person that these are the things I always wanted someone else to tell me instead of to just "get over it" and pretend it never happened when I was going through my heartbreaks. I learned the hard way of what happens when I ignored my emotions and bottled up everything I feel to make others happy while neglecting myself. I allowed people used me and that ended with me going into a bad state of mind for a very long time. No more. Even w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 11:18 PM
67

The guy I was chatting with after my latest ex-boyfriend told me this lol. He liked women who didn't play games, who were open and honest because those traits were important to him since he lived by them too. We spent many nights talking till sunrise and he would always tell me I wasn't "like other girls" because I wasn't demanding for his time or a commitment, we could talk about just anything and I didn't played games with him. However, as things go, I started developing feelings (gross!) for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 10:18 PM
6

You're welcome :) Everything I wrote down was what I needed and wanted to hear someone tell me when I was going through my own heartbreaks but had to learned on my own. I hope I'm able to help others even just a little bit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:20 PM
35

I was a pick me with my first ex-boyfriend (whom I dated this year) and for my rebound second ex-boyfriend (whom I also dated this year). I was a pick me for all the men I thought found me desirable and "girlfriend" material but in fact only wanted to use my body for their spank bank. All from this year only. So, the shame is still there along with dealing with the aftermath. Everyone told me I needed to get over my first (emotional abusive) relationship and the way I was feeling. They said go p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:14 PM
13

How did I knew their laughs were gonna be "Ah ha ha...haa" before I even clicked the link? 😂 Guess I've encountered enough fuck boys to last a lifetime lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 06:17 AM
88

A friend called them the fuck boys of Tic Tok lol. The ones who rub their hands together like it's the middle of winter, bite/lick their lips a lot, stick out their tongues every 2 seconds, can't stop brushing their hair with their hands, winking like there's an eyelash stuck in their eyeballs and constantly lift their shirts up to show off their abs in front of their bros. Yes, I've seen a lot of those videos because my baby sister follows these types of guys lol. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:21 AM
8

I agree. I've talked to my share of guys who just wanna "be friends" or have normal chats then once they feel that I'm hooked or whatever, they'll send naked/dick photos and suggest sexting as a way to pass time. I think with my past, I'm more sensitive now to the way men talk and can instantly know when they're going to derail the conversation. However, I know to stay vigilant. The guy I'm currently talking with hasn't brought up anything close to a red flag but I'm cautious and proceeding very…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:16 AM
3

Thank you ☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:09 AM
6

Thank you 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:05 AM
2

Thank you so much! :) I was actually in a bad state of mind this past weekend but reflecting on how much I changed and went through earlier, I feel really proud of myself. I am stronger than I believe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:02 AM
83

I get this 100%. For the past year or so, I would post racy photos of me on an app I used because it was the only way I thought I could get a man's attention. As someone who never dated before, never been in a relationship, had a lot of trauma as a kid and always felt ignored by men, it felt... amazing to know that I was wanted by men. For once, I had over a dozen men vying for me and I felt sexy, beautiful and in charge. But of course it was all in my head. Most of the men were only nice becaus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 10:46 PM
255

That's the latest trend of "hot guys" for the new generation of girls and ISTG, they get worst and worst looking every year lol. I feel like taking a shower now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 10:27 PM
1

My sister's boyfriend works at a hospital where he signs in patients and is constantly around nurses and doctors. So basically, he hears everything that goes on with them. About 90% of the time, it's just women talking about hooking up with married men or cheating on their spouses. My sister's boyfriend was shocked when he first worked there but now he's so used to the stores that it doesn't even affect him anymore. The only thing that annoys him is when they start hitting on him despite knowing…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:36 PM
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