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View 2 posts and 246 comments by razqel on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
15

razqel/r/seduction16/05/11 02:41 AM
13

razqel/r/seduction08/07/11 06:15 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
0

Someone please explain to me why the hell this no content post is upvoted. It's neither novel nor insightful. Not trying to be mean, but really wished something upvoted this high had a little more substance to it.
/r/seduction04/12/12 03:25 AM
1

Yes indeed. Typically mentioned in reference to boys hitting puberty and ejaculating in their sleep.
/r/seduction11/11/12 05:45 AM
1

By nocturnal emissions are you referring to wet dreams?
/r/seduction11/11/12 05:11 AM
1

It is a fact that if you do not self gratify during the day it will happen during the night when you are asleep. Hi, can you explain where you got that from? Correct me if I'm wrong (with sources), but I don't think there is any evidence of this.
/r/seduction11/11/12 01:14 AM
2

The points you mentioned were some of the main reasons I left this subreddit almost a year ago. Before then, I was quite active in commenting and posting, but I found my voice was a minority. I've met a few mPUAs who referred to the problem as "inner game bullshit". It gives you the confidence boost with no real effort or risk on your part. You feel a sense of accomplishment, yet don't take any action. It's easy for newbies to give this kind of advice because it's a simple solution to a complex …
/r/seduction19/09/12 06:01 AM
3

You've got the right idea. Being selective does communicate positive qualities provided that your other communication and behaviors up to that point demonstrate that you're a high value male. For example, I'm sure you've met virgins who are afraid to even speak to girls and use the "she's not my type" or "I haven't met the right person yet" excuse to justify their inaction. Obviously, they're not fooling anyone but themselves and women don't interpret their response to mean they're selective, me…
/r/seduction03/06/12 03:31 AM
3

If waiting for marriage is the legitimate reason you're still a virgin, then it's a legitimate thing to say. It may not jive with what she wants, but if what you say is true it wouldn't be what you want either, so you find out sooner rather than later. In this case, you're communicating your selectivity: you don't want just any girl, you want that special girl.. and if you're an attractive, high value male, it's her and every girl's fantasy that you'll eventually choose her to be the one. These …
/r/seduction02/06/12 06:47 PM
2

I get your sentiment and I agree. It doesn't matter whether you're a virgin or not. The advice for virgins to act like they're not is a sound one in general. You should dodge the question in most cases and I advocate not bringing it up as well if it can be avoided. But if you feel the relationship has the potential to develop into something more serious down the line, I would avoid claiming you aren't a virgin if you are. Lying hurts the foundation of the relationship and it's a beta quality you…
/r/seduction02/06/12 06:40 PM
74

Women assume all men want sex. They think that if a high value man wants sex, he would have had it already. If a guy is a virgin, especially in his later years, women assume he must be a low value beta--that there is something "wrong" with him. It's an issue of preselection. Male virginity signals to women that he was/is not desired by other woman. If he was desired by other woman (because of his alpha qualities) he would not be a virgin. You need to demonstrate a few things to overcome this sti…
/r/seduction02/06/12 08:13 AM
1

I take it you're familiar with Frank's work? If so, I'm curious how you came across it. I was a former student of his and always interested in discussing his work with others.
/r/seduction21/05/12 03:57 PM
5

Seems obvious, but people approach people who seem approachable. The cues are warm eye contact, a friendly/playful smile, pleasant demeanor, bubbly personality, open body language, and so forth. If you look too dressed-up/high class, guys may not bother, as they perceive you as unattainable while some may even go so far as to equate that to having a cold personality. This is why giving off a friendly vibe to everyone you meet is important. It makes you look more "down to earth" and relatable. Yo…
/r/seduction20/05/12 05:57 AM
2

Came here to say this. You're completely right. Seems like the majority of Seddit has the concept of neg confused with teasing or insulting. The original meaning of neg has been so misconstrued. The term is no longer applied as it was intended to. Thank you for providing clarification for others.
/r/seduction19/09/11 05:46 PM
1

Yes, it is possible to combine the two. I'm explaining how to express your feelings of falling in love without coming off beta. You do that by avoiding needy behavior and attitudes.
/r/seduction08/09/11 05:36 PM
2

You can be romantic and fall in love quickly... there is some charm in that. But just be aware of some of the potential traps you may find yourself in: Giving more attention than she's earned or reciprocated Acting clingy/needy/suffocating Trying to push for too much, too soon Doing too much pull and zero push Putting her on a pedestal Be romantic, but make sure the effort is not a one-way street. Maintain an abundance mentality, alpha behaviors, and calibrate as to not come on too strong. Lastl…
/r/seduction08/09/11 06:25 AM
1

See my response to unchaval below.
/r/seduction06/09/11 12:56 AM
2

It's okay if you're sleeping with her, but to an extent. Being emotionally supportive is part of the intimacy-building process. It's both a benefit and a healthy aspect of relationships. Once you sleep with a girl, you no longer run the risk of being categorized in the friend-zone, so it's okay for the most part. You still need to know when to ignore some rants/venting if it happens very often (e.g., daily), otherwise it wears down on attraction. Part of the reason is those negative feelings can…
/r/seduction06/09/11 12:55 AM
19

Flirting/attraction-building. You don't have to do anything overtly sexual, but you still need to flirt and make it clear that you are interested in her in a sexual, I-don't-just-want-to-be-your-friend kind of way. This is how you avoid the friend-zone. Escalation. This doesn't mean sexually escalating quickly. It does mean you need to get her comfortable with you touching her, even if it's more friendly than sexual early on. Do not be her therapist. One of the traps of wanting emotional intimac…
/r/seduction05/09/11 07:32 AM
3

A good number of guys think that the way to become a successful seducer is to abandon any and all signs of weakness. They become cold approach machines and lose touch with their humanity. To be alpha, in their mind, is to be the ultra dominant, cocky, non-reactive, invulnerable... and, therefore, inhuman. In the process trying to obtain their impossible standards of perfection, they deny any negative feelings they may experience, hide it from others like it's something to be ashamed of (because …
/r/seduction29/08/11 03:11 AM
1

Thanks. Hope OP finds it useful too.
/r/seduction28/08/11 06:02 AM
1

Is being with her a possibility now that (I assume) you're in a different country? If so, why don't you get her back? What would you have done differently knowing what you know now?
/r/seduction28/08/11 02:00 AM
8

Here's an unfortunate fact that most of the community is unwilling to admit: not all pick up advice is applicable to long term relationships. Ideas like always being aloof, trying to be less invested by being cool and emotionally reserved, and showing no weakness are wrong and damaging. They have their place, but if you use them as your default behavior and attitude, you're going to fail. In an effort to kill their former AFC selves, they adopt extreme opposite behaviors, not knowing that these …
/r/seduction28/08/11 01:50 AM
2

I agree with a lot of what frogma says. There's basically two ways I would've dealt with it. Option 1: I would've called him out or confronted him when this happened: "Steph said there's lots of strippers here and escorts!" and she starts telling me about strippers and escorts, as if I'm interested, or as if he told her I was looking for one. I would've asked if Steph was interested in strippers and escorts. If not, how did they come to that topic of discussion because it's completely out of the…
/r/seduction27/08/11 08:34 PM
2

Although it wasn't easy, you approached any way. That deserves props in my books. I hope you see that the lesson is always more valuable than the outcome. As long as you learned something from the interaction then you will only get better and better with time. Keep approaching! You did a good job pointing out some of the mistakes you made. What would you have done differently to build attraction? How might have the presence of her colleague influence her response? The Chase article you posted ha…
/r/seduction26/08/11 04:40 PM
2

Whatever the reason for things not working out, it almost certainly wasn't because you were a bad kisser.
/r/seduction26/08/11 01:43 AM
3

The issue is that you didn't sexually escalate quick enough. By the time you went for the kiss, she had friend-zoned you in her mind and the window for sexual attraction had closed, the moment was gone. That's why she said the kissing didn't feel right; she saw you as non-sexual friend. (ref: MM Model; comfort before attraction = friend zone). Next time, make a move (i.e., kino) early on to frame a sexual interaction (you're not their to make another female friend; you're there for romance/sex).…
/r/seduction26/08/11 12:13 AM
1

For what? What would they have to do to need it? Would they just use it at any point if that were the case? The "get out of jail free card" I'm referring to is used as a pre-emptive strike so that she doesn't feel like she's leading you on if things don't turn out well or get awkward. It puts them in control so that they have an out should they need to use it. But again, there could be many reasons a girl would use the bf excuse which all depend on the context. If you're not hitting on her but s…
/r/seduction25/08/11 05:25 AM
1

It's difficult to fully analyze where things might have gone wrong to cause them to say they had boyfriends. I suggest you provide the full context of your interactions, like how do you know them, your approach, the conversations, their reactions, and so forth. Essentially write a FR and post it up to get people's input. Without this information, any advice you receive would just be conjecture. Given the limited information, here are a few preliminary thoughts: If a girl consistently brings up t…
/r/seduction25/08/11 02:05 AM
2

You're right. It was her ASD but also she didn't want you to give the impression that she wanted a relationship. Consider this an invitation into a FWB.
/r/seduction24/08/11 06:25 AM
2

What unique challenges would you say Asian men face when it comes to seduction? What would you recommend to them? Which thought leaders in seduction (or other arena) has been been the most influential force in shaping your current perceptions of seduction/relationships? Which model(s) of seduction (or other field, like psychology) do you find most useful for understanding the core or essential elements of attraction/seduction/relationships/self-improvement? What widely-accepted community wisdom …
/r/seduction24/08/11 02:31 AM
1

The process of determining the emotional need is a logical one, but the solution I suggested satisfies her emotional "hurt" or "need", whereas a logical solution would not. For example, a logical argument would perhaps be to accuse the girl of over reacting or insist that it makes no difference of cleaning something yesterday or today. And reasonably speaking, those are true. But they miss out on the true source of anguish, which is her being upset at irresponsible/beta behavior. Emotional needs…
/r/seduction24/08/11 12:48 AM
2

The difference between an mPUA and a newbie/AFC is about 1000 approaches (Credit DJ Fuji)
/r/seduction23/08/11 11:45 PM
12

Focus on making yourself comfortable in an interaction, rather than trying to make the girl/set feel comfortable. If you do the former, the latter will happen naturally. (Credit unkonwn Sedditor) Focus on your own entertainment and fun, rather than trying to entertain or impress others. If you do the former, the latter will happen naturally. Overall theme: Everything starts with the inside. What you feel will project out to others. Focus on the main variable under your control: yourself.
/r/seduction23/08/11 06:37 PM
1

If you have any romantic interest in a girl, following the female friend criteria will help you on your seduction journey to becoming a more attractive man. There are several reasons for this. A girl who sees you as a high value, attractive man will either have sex with you herself, or at the very least be willing to help you get sex. She'll truly look out for your interest and will not cockblock you. If she's not willing to do either of these things, she really doesn't perceive you as being of …
/r/seduction23/08/11 05:15 PM
13

Do not talk to her about her relationship with other guys, especially if it deals with sad feelings, as she will associate those bad feelings with you. Not to mention that kind of talk is reserved for people in the friend zone or her "female friends with penises", which is not what you want to be. Talking about her problems would not make her perceive you as a nice guy she would bang, so avoid it at all costs. Next time she brings it up, tell her these exact words: "Stop. I'm not your therapist.…
/r/seduction23/08/11 05:43 AM
3

Ya, when people feel they aren't being listened to or understood, they respond by being more defensive/aggressive. They usually take more extreme positions in hopes of hammering their point home, all the while developing tunnel vision and shutting out opposing views. People's emotions, although subjective, are real to them. If we don't identify, acknowledge, and address them, we run the risk of antagonizing the situation further.
/r/seduction23/08/11 02:57 AM
16

With both sexes, when you straight up use logic, you have failed to empathize with the other person's perspective. A more effective way is to validate their feelings and, as you said, de-escalate the argument to one where a discussion can take place. I agree with you that using logic to argue with women is not very effective. They are arguing from an emotional standpoint, and using logic is like communicating with a different language. As in this case, you have failed to validate and address the…
/r/seduction23/08/11 01:41 AM
1

Lovers almost always have the option to become friends, but the reverse is rarely true. For those new to seduction, you should define a female friend as someone who is either a) having sex with you, or b) helping you hook up with other people. Other than that, I'm not clear on what your dilemma is. When given the choice of being a friend or a lover, you choose lover because you don't want to be a friend? That's not really a dilemma. Or are you just worried about being taken advantage of by a fri…
/r/seduction23/08/11 01:13 AM
3

Happy to help! Good luck to you.
/r/seduction22/08/11 08:19 PM
16

Your description of this girls profile indicates that she loves traveling, being outgoing, living a fast-paced life full of adventure, and a nympho. Furthermore, she hinted that there's other guys interested in her. This tells me that she's not ready to settle down with one guy and that she'd rather play the field a bit and continue having adventures and enjoy sex with whomever she wants. Given that she desires this kind of freedom, it looks like you demonstrated too much interest and investment…
/r/seduction22/08/11 08:03 PM
1

Well now you just made my day. Sincerest thanks, Sed5! :)
/r/seduction22/08/11 05:52 PM
1

Much appreciated, my good man!
/r/seduction21/08/11 05:36 AM
1

Why wait for sex? The way to find out how into it she is is by actually having sex. The date shouldn't turn from friendly to romantic, it should be romantic/sexual/flirty from very early on. Logistically, there are few compromises for bringing her to your house.
/r/seduction20/08/11 09:30 PM
1

Acting overly dramatic, vengeful or spiteful, or obsessive. All signs of an unhealthy attitude toward relationships. If she trash talks her ex and becomes obsessed with it, that's a red flag.
/r/seduction20/08/11 09:25 PM
4

Avoid giving the impression that you're only seeing either of them exclusively, such as limiting your dates with each one to once a week and not calling so often. As long as you've been honest and haven't lied, there should be no expectation that you're exclusive with anyone. If you're interested in a FWB situation, you can disqualify yourself as a boyfriend. You may also ask them are they seeing other guys, as it frames it as you guys aren't exclusive. If she asks it about you, tell her you're …
/r/seduction20/08/11 09:09 PM
6

To echo everyone else's statement: screen for red flags! Here are just some red flags to look out for: Acts clingy very quickly Gets really emotional or angry when talking about their exes Dogmatic in her beliefs (religious or otherwise) Values her pet over a boyfriend ("If your house was burning down, who would you save?") Does hard drugs and possibly addicted Bitchy toward people (like waiters) Trash talks about her friends (you may be next) Violent or emotionally unstable (and proud of it) Hu…
/r/seduction20/08/11 08:53 PM
6

Great points. If I may further add: 1) Expectations. If you don't communicate your expectations and lead the relationship, you leave the other person to project her expectations, which may put you in an uncomfortable situation. This is how people find themselves in relationships structures they don't really want. 2) Honesty. Honesty also means having the courage to tell her uncomfortable truths when it is necessary. That doesn't mean disregarding her feelings; it means having the respect to tell…
/r/seduction19/08/11 10:33 PM
0

Props to you, bro, for having the courage to lay out some truth about the "dark side" of the community, as controversial as topic may be. I agree with most, if not all, of what you said. Although there are people that claim that your statements are a gross over-generalization, there are many aspiring PUAs that fall into the traps of conventional community wisdom. Many of the so-called PUA mindsets are taken too literally or to such extremes that they become dysfunctional (e.g., be non-reactive, …
/r/seduction19/08/11 09:57 PM
1

I interpret what your first bullet as saying don't put women on a pedestal, which I am in total agreement with. However, I disagree with your second bullet and here's why: If you have a strong frame and make no excuses for your lifestyle, women will find that attractive, as you are demonstrating dominance, honesty, and other attractive qualities. Telling a girl you're not looking for a serious relationship and even that you're seeing other people is not necessarily a deal breaker. The reason why…
/r/seduction15/08/11 08:08 PM
2

Makes me think of someone going "Oh little johnny could have never done that, he goes to church!" Your comment made me laugh. I thought the same thing.
/r/seduction11/08/11 07:42 AM
15

Not sure what you want guidance on. Can you be more specific? Here's how you avoid hurting people: Be honest and never lie about your intentions or expectations. It's okay to not know at the moment what you want, but it's not okay to mislead someone. Leave them better than you found them. Build them up and be a value giver. Let them know you appreciate and enjoy your time together. Look out for their best interest. If she becomes depressed about your player lifestyle, let her go and wish her wel…
/r/seduction11/08/11 12:14 AM
44

Yes, I'm glad you brought this up. I'd like to also add that generic advice is often marginally useful at best. Things like: "You gotta work on your inner game. Remember, you are awesome!" don't really give any specific framework to work from. Might I suggest a few guidelines when posting advice: Identify the issue Explain what the problem was by referencing theory or experience (what standard are you basing your judgments) Based on the theory, provide constructive, practical (i.e., actionable) …
/r/seduction10/08/11 04:20 PM
3

I'm the same way. And it's also an area I'm working to improve (in relationships, work, etc.), as I find it more efficient to get a girl who is already willing to go all the way with me than to change the mind of someone who isn't. It seems to work well for people who are just naturally flirty all the time. For them it's a natural part of their daily interaction with people--something that's fun to do as opposed to effort intensive. I think that's the key to making it work. I have personal anecd…
/r/seduction07/08/11 11:45 PM
1

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to this, and no "one best smile". It's all context dependent and as you said relevant to the type of personality you want to convey. You could (and should) be using both types, and especially use whatever works for you. Calibration will tell you what's appropriate and when. I wouldn't think of it as strong but silent close lipped smiler vs. party-going open lipped smiler. They're not dichotomous. A full range of options are available. The danger new…
/r/seduction07/08/11 06:02 PM
3

Persistence is an attractive quality. It shows that the person is confident and comfortable in social situations. It's especially effective with females, as it communicates that this is a guy who sees something special in her, and thereby removes the feeling of sluttiness. Yes, persistence can be creepy if done incorrectly. The key to making it work is to do it without being needy, clingy, or outcome dependent. A woman will accept the attention if she knows a guy will not be an emotional liabili…
/r/seduction07/08/11 05:40 PM
2

Haven't read the particular articles you spoke about, but from my experience, Chase knows his stuff. The important thing when reading any seduction material is to understand the context. Talking does matter, but he may be referring to the attractive qualities that talking is meant to convey (e.g., confidence, dominance, social). Again, I could be wrong as I haven't read it yet, but this is one interpretation. Both closed and open lipped smiles can be attractive. However, a closed lip smile is mu…
/r/seduction07/08/11 06:12 AM
2

My pleasure, man. Related thoughts: Despite what many people here will tell you, the principles of front-end game (pick up) as traditionally taught in the PUA community is different than the back-end game (LTR). If your end-game is an LTR, then follow a guru who specializes in relationships or has had a lot of success in LTRs rather than gurus who only teach cold approaches at clubs/bars. Related to the above, keep exercising critical thinking with all the advice you're given and the material yo…
/r/seduction06/08/11 06:17 AM
1

a) She wants to have an out if things get awkward or you turn out to be a creepy guy b) Some girls don't want to feel like they owe the guy anything, as it makes it harder for her to turn down advances and not seem ingrateful Regardless, it shouldn't change your approach and it is still very much on.
/r/seduction06/08/11 05:40 AM
2

Here are a few tips: She likely fought with you because you're showing some weakness in some part of your character and this is her way of testing to see if she is with a high value male. There is something you're doing wrong in terms of addressing her emotional needs that needs fixing. Of course, you're not doing it all wrong because she would rather be in a less than optimal relationship with you than not at all, which is why you leaving causes her to chase you. She may be attracted to you for…
/r/seduction05/08/11 07:50 PM
1

It sounds like the decision you have is between better health and easy openers. But it's not an either/or decision, as you can have both. Smoking is a social crutch to opening but you can also engage people without it. I used to go to bars and clubs without drinking, that's because I wasn't there to drink, I was there to meet girls. It's only awkward if you're uncomfortable with it.
/r/seduction04/08/11 07:05 PM
2

The concept that the first interactions set the precedent for the rest of the relationship is true. With regard to leading, in most cases men will be the ones that will need to initiate and lead the interaction. It's an attraction switch and quality of high value males. Furthermore, women are pursued all the time, so they simply wait for men to approach and lead the interaction. I think what Manwhore wanted to say is this: We must lead, but also ensure the girl invests. At least that's what it s…
/r/seduction03/08/11 03:48 AM
2

Manwhore explains how to do this quite well in this video.
/r/seduction01/08/11 03:10 PM
17

Don't give them a chance to categorize you as cute. As soon as they do women assume a mother role, as opposed to a lover role. That categorization (cute kid) will stick with you and prevent you from building any sort of sexual attraction. The desire to nurture someone and have sex with them are incompatible in attraction. That's why from the very first moment you need to frame yourself as a sexual and masculine guy. Exhibit more dominance. Be more overt/direct in your intentions and actions. Sex…
/r/seduction31/07/11 05:36 PM
3

Fully agree with the first two paragraphs. The expectations you set up early on dictate the type of relationship you get later on. The majority of posts I see are "how do I get this new girl?" and less of applying seduction theory once someone gets into a relationship. Approaches are a huge hurdle for people, so the front end stuff like opening and approaches get a lot of attention. That's understandable since pickup typically focuses on the beginning of relationships. Yes, there is discussion a…
/r/seduction23/07/11 08:45 PM
12

A big focus in the community is sex. The F-close is often regarded as the ultimate goal and the measure of a man's success in the field. The idea of building relationships and forming a connection (i.e., comfort stage stuff) isn't given a lot of attention. When comfort-related stuff is talked about, it's usually done superficially and treated as a means to an end. I believe part of the reason is this is the strategy most guys have tried in the past and it landed them in the friend zone. A key th…
/r/seduction23/07/11 06:43 PM
5

She friendzoned you. She's not playing hard to get. She's simply not attracted to you. Recognize when it's a lost cause and stop trying to game her. Since you are categorized as "just a friend", it means she doesn't see you as an attractive, high value male. That's why the text you sent isn't perceived as clever or seductive. Instead, it is perceived as desperate. The category of you she has in her mind makes all the difference. Being extra flirty won't help due to her perception of you. Being a…
/r/seduction22/07/11 11:22 PM
9

Gonna have to echo this sentiment: you need to protect her reputation in front of her friends. She doesn't want to be regarded as easy. Be sure to be discreet at the beginning and especially around other people. You're going to need to do a bit of damage control. She may have categorized you as the kind of guy that can't be discreet and might blab about hooking up with her. Communicate directly or indirectly (through stories or DHVs) that you will protect her reputation. I would ping her. Ask he…
/r/seduction22/07/11 09:05 PM
1

People are lazy, and forgetful. They won't work on their inner game which requires challenging yourself. This is true too. Not everyone is willing to admit there are aspects of themselves they need to work on. They remain in denial to protect their ego. I have several friends who fall into this category. For those that are aware, improving game requires a ton of work and effort. Eliminating bad habits, sexually escalating, putting yourself out there... they all require you to take a risk. If it …
/r/seduction22/07/11 08:51 PM
0

No need to vocalize it to her directly either online or at her party. If things don't play out the way you want, that can create some real awkwardness. It puts a lot of pressure on her when it should be you, the man, who seductively leads the interaction. Yes, you need to make a move before your window of opportunity closes and she friend-zones you. Do that by kino escalation and sexualizing the interaction (flirt). You can let her know why you like spending time with her and see how she reacts …
/r/seduction22/07/11 02:24 PM
3

The deep dive is good starting point. If you're good at listening to people, use that to your advantage to build an emotional connection. If you're more comfortable talking to people one-on-one than in big groups, then isolate the girl and create an atmosphere/bubble where only the two of you exist. Becoming good at seduction means you need to be versatile, capable of conversing and captivating if the situation requires. DJ Fuji recommends doing word association drills as fast as you can. My rec…
/r/seduction22/07/11 07:53 AM
5

Overall, you've got good self-awareness and seem capable of correcting some of your behavior. However, I feel that your keen awareness causes you to overanalyze things. This can be a bad thing as you see every interaction as a positive or a negative, and that sucks the joy and spontaneity of the moment. You become obsessed with whether you're doing the right thing. If this is true, I advise you to try to live life without always thinking of game. Your cause-and-effect statements indicate that yo…
/r/seduction22/07/11 07:37 AM
2

I wouldn't automatically judge girls' advice as invalid or useless. I've found that certain female friends of mine have reasonable to good insight into how the female attraction mechanism works. If you disagree with something she said, state what it is and provide your reason for it. Ad hominem arguments are no good here. I'd like to add that I think OP raised some useful points.
/r/seduction22/07/11 05:51 AM
2

What area of seduction are you looking to improve most? Richard La Ruina does an excellent talk on non-verbal game--how to seduce using mostly your body language and projecting sexuality and dominance.
/r/seduction22/07/11 05:10 AM
1

Social circle building can be an effective way to meet women. It's a whole topic on its own, but the general idea is meeting a different groups of people, expanding your social network, hosting social gatherings, and eventually being invited to a lot in return. Other good places to meet women are: libraries, book stores, shopping malls, festivals and concerts, parks, street markets, campuses and any campus events, etc.
/r/seduction22/07/11 04:14 AM
5

27,000 readers 26,950 of them lurkers
/r/seduction22/07/11 03:59 AM
2

lol! Ya I remember seeing that on Reddit and I think that's where I borrowed this idea from. Great how a foreveralone line can be made seductive with the right twist.
/r/seduction22/07/11 03:54 AM
4

I think it's a good thing for several reasons: I believe that the world would be a better place the more we help lonely, insecure guys become confident, high value individuals. It exposes and hopefully eliminates PUA techniques that are too gimmicky, canned, hardcore, manipulative and disingenuous. As a consequence, it'll promote methods that are more focused on helping guys develop their own attractive persona that fits their personality. It will kill the game for people who cannot truly intern…
/r/seduction22/07/11 01:33 AM
14

Non-exhaustive list: Emotional journey. Women respond to emotions so give her an emotional experience (e.g., tease, banter, story telling). This includes talking about interesting, emotion-laden topics (e.g., tough times, personal adventures or traveling, family). Sexualizing. Make her feel sexy and desired by a strong male (e.g., flirting, compliment). Educate. Teacher her about herself, the world, or people (e.g., psychology, how she comes across to you, world issues, philosophy, art, your are…
/r/seduction22/07/11 01:02 AM
9

"Thanks, you have good taste. And who might you be?" or "This is my shirt. You can't have it." ;) If she opens you, that's a huge IOI, which means you can escalate the interaction very quickly. No need to compliment unless it's sincere. Otherwise it comes off disingenuous. But you can sexualize it further and say, "I like a girl with a cute smile." If you want to tease add, "... and yours is nice too." Continue with the stages of attraction. An easy lead in is, "And what brings you here?" The co…
/r/seduction22/07/11 12:17 AM
2

Realize that there could be consequences to hooking up with people in your social and professional circles. If someone you pursue turns down your advances or you guys eventually break up, it could get very awkward. Mutual friends and coworkers might find out as well and exacerbate the issue. Think through the consequences and potential fallout very carefully. Unless you're both experienced in managing these kind of relationships and willing to lose certain friends, I'd advise against it. If you …
/r/seduction21/07/11 04:13 AM
15

Agreed with heckz. Don't talk about it. If she brings it up you can tell her you're seeing other women, but you two just met and aren't at a point where it warrants a discussion about relationships. Until the day comes along where you know who you want to settle down with, you're free to see whoever you want, and she has the freedom to do the same. Also, never ever lie to women. If you have to lie to get women, you don't deserve them. As ethical seducers, we aim to leave women better than we fou…
/r/seduction21/07/11 04:01 AM
2

I like that it explains behaviour that most men would chalk up to 'women are random'. And put in that light, I lost some of my disdain for them because they can't really be blamed for it... Completely agree. What was also enlightening is that not all tests are shit tests (i.e., tests of dominance). When you perceive every test as a shit test, you naturally develop a disdain for women because you're always wondering why they keep trying to challenge you. When I realized this was not the case my v…
/r/seduction20/07/11 05:26 PM
26

This has been my message to community for a while now, but it often gets downvoted because people are very bought into the stereotypical alpha male paradigm. I'll admit, I didn't do nearly as good a job articulating my thoughts as Chase. Really glad to see this point communicated so well by a respectable seducer in the community. Something every Sedditor should read.
/r/seduction20/07/11 04:07 PM
1

I'd like to add that what the community calls a shit test is really a test of dominance (EN4). The vast, vast majority of PUAs mistakenly believe that all tests are shit tests. They neglect to identify the emotional need and this miscategorization leads many guys into a lot of trouble. For example, PUAs will almost always interpret a girl asking, "Does this dress make me look fat?" as a test of dominance. The typical response would be to agree and amplify. But it could also be a test of honesty …
/r/seduction20/07/11 07:58 AM
1

That's exactly where I got this Mother-Lover theory from. I was a student of Frank's back when he was still in Toronto. His work has been the primary influence in my seduction philosophy. You're the first one on Seddit I've heard mention his book. Are you a student of his?
/r/seduction20/07/11 07:25 AM
118

Oneitis. One-sided love. You feel needy and dependent on the other person. You put in far more effort than she does. You sacrifice your self-respect and dignity to be with someone who doesn't feel the same way. Healthy relationship. Mutual love. You're independently happy and a "complete" person outside of her. She adds something extra to your life, not substitutes it. She has earned your love and respect for good reasons.
/r/seduction20/07/11 06:05 AM
5

Truth. Women will try to mother the people in their lives. It's their mothering instinct at work and it makes her feel needed. What it doesn't do is build attraction. She'll do this until you show her that you are a strong man, someone that can be her lover. That's why it's important, especially in the beginning, not to let her mother you in any way. Things like cooking, cleaning for you, nagging over small things, making all the decisions, etc., puts her in the mother role. Some people may thin…
/r/seduction20/07/11 03:48 AM
1

Within the college and international student community in Nashville, the majority of couples are white male/Asian female. Overall, Asian girls here have a preference for white men, whether they were originally from abroad or born in the US. Among my married/engaged Asian female friends and acquaintances in the US, the majority of them are with a white male. Almost all of them got engaged directly after graduating (Green card?). But I wouldn't say being Asian is viewed unfavorably.. probably neut…
/r/seduction19/07/11 05:16 AM
4

Consider taking someone you trust aside and asking him/her to help point out the things you do that give off that vibe. Also, I can imagine where some of the issues are, but there's really not a lot of information to go on besides the serious face and eye contact you mention. If you want more specific advice, consider providing more details or even post a video/picture. Now for some general advice: A serious face by itself is not a bad thing, but it doesn't help to put people at ease. That's why…
/r/seduction18/07/11 04:02 PM
1

Agreed. Often the community is so invested and set in their own paradigm that they don't see how crazy/out of place their advice actually is. This is especially true for newbies who are willing to try and do whatever it takes to get girls. They get caught up in the wild rockstar image they have of PUAs and try to adopt equally larger-than-life personalities. Regardless of what level of skill you have, the key is to exercise your own judgment and be critical of the advice you're given.. even when…
/r/seduction18/07/11 04:20 AM
2

If what you're doing gets you the results you want, by all means. If not, modify your approach. As with all game, calibration is key.
/r/seduction17/07/11 09:05 PM
2

Laughter should be used to put people at ease, make them feel comfortable, and create enjoyment. If you deliberately act awkward or massively cocky and it makes people feel uncomfortable, then that's the opposite of seduction and you should consider other ways to generate laughter.
/r/seduction17/07/11 08:23 PM
7

Making people laugh can be a technique in seduction, but by no means is it the whole game. Women need a range of emotions. Laughter satisfies one part of that entire range. Humor (if done right) demonstrates that you are non-threatening, friendly, and confident. If it's all you do, then you get categorized as a clown.
/r/seduction17/07/11 08:14 PM
4

Any approach or rejection is worthwhile if you can learn from them and make better, more calibrated choices in the future. In your case, can you think of reasons why your approach did not work? In retrospect, what would have been a better approach?
/r/seduction17/07/11 08:03 PM
2

That's really not a question anyone besides you can answer. If you feel that way, then it's true. No one lives in your reality but you. Others would just be projecting their own realities on the issue. As with many of my other female friends, you're at the age now where it's common for women to want to settle down. If your life is more or less complete and you know who you are and what you want, then having the right man can really enrich your life. Similarly, a good chunk of guys here learn gam…
/r/seduction17/07/11 05:26 PM
1

Thanks for the review. I've noticed an increasing recognition of using different approaches to attract different women and abandoning the idea of a "one sized fits all" style to seduction. Adam Lyons and Vince Kelvin both advocate this situational/contingency approach too. They claim theirs are based on psychological research (PEN model). I think I'll check out Pandora's Box as well.
/r/seduction14/07/11 09:42 PM
1

What's your opinion of this product? Do you think his categorization of women and techniques to attract them are valid? The first time I came across this was one of those spammy redirect ads with some BS "You've been specially selected in your region... limited offer... 300 seconds remaining to purchase..." This automatically raises my spidey senses and makes me highly suspicious that it might be a fake.
/r/seduction14/07/11 06:40 PM
1

Awesome breakdown, chumpta. Love these kind of well thought out discussions. whatever stupid scuffle they were in was only the superficial surface of the girl's true complaint Bingo. That's why with women you can't use logic to reason yourself out of an emotional argument. You may "win" short term, but you'll lose in the long term. I always stress identifying women's emotional need that is expressed and addressing it. you cannot expect a woman to tell you straight out "it's not the garage, it's …
/r/seduction12/07/11 08:33 AM
1

If in your regular daily life people don't tell you that you act drunk, then you may be "putting on" a personality when you do pickup. If that's the case you need to tone it down and start aligning your pickup behaviors with your natural self. I know some guys act too energetic/excited/woo when they're doing pickup like, "Yeeaaaah, oh man high fives!! You guys TOTALLY rock! I'm SOOO gonna adopt you as you my little sister." You should have good energy, but not acting like a drunken fratboy.
/r/seduction12/07/11 06:17 AM
1

College game explained by Nick Braddock: video.
/r/seduction12/07/11 05:08 AM
6

Become an high value male. You can't fake it. You actually have to become someone of high value. This is what working on game/seduction is all about. Address her emotional needs. While improving your game you'll learn to identify her emotional needs and address them. This is what providing a range of emotions, demonstrating dominance, being honest, making her feel secure, etc., etc., is all about. Build strong emotional experiences and connection. I want to emphasize #3 because that's something …
/r/seduction12/07/11 02:27 AM
1

My pleasure.. Manwhore's talk touches on this topic too: video.
/r/seduction12/07/11 01:57 AM
1

Manwhore's talk touches on this topic: video.
/r/seduction12/07/11 01:55 AM
3

Verbally sparring is a contest to see who can DLV the most or be the bigger a-hole. Trying to out-tool your friends is not a winning strategy for a high value male. Being direct and sincere is the way to defend yourself. Responses to a similar post can be found here and here.
/r/seduction10/07/11 08:22 AM
1

Agreed. Don't fight the emotion. Let fear run its course and burn itself out. Sure, it may be embarrassing the first few times, but the more and longer you stay in an interaction, the more comfortable you'll become. So continue to push through it.
/r/seduction10/07/11 08:13 AM
11

my alphaness lagging behind theirs... it's like sparring with tougher opponents. This is the wrong frame of mind. Being alpha is not a competition of who's cockier. Trying to outdo each other comes from a place of weakness, not true strength--of having to prove to others you're better in some way. This is one of the reasons for my criticism of the stereotypical alpha male in this post. A high quality male is someone who gives value, not taking away someone else's to boost their own. Do not look …
/r/seduction09/07/11 07:42 PM
30

I agree that when a few guys do it to you, you get rid of them. But when every other guy friend does it to you, that's more of my problem, than their problem. I like your attitude and perspective on the issue. Chalengr, you've got solid game. No reason why you should let this get in your way. I used to deal with the same problem to a limited extent. Both parties need to be complicit in any action. If your friends try to lower your value, only you can give them permission to continue doing it ove…
/r/seduction09/07/11 05:37 PM
1

Good job man. Be sure to post a field report about it.
/r/seduction09/07/11 05:12 PM
3

Just came to give my applause. You rocked it. Have an upvote.
/r/seduction09/07/11 08:17 AM
1

First off, you're acting needy for this girl. You should not be vying for her attention, at least not in an obvious way. One thing she could worry is that if she calls you her boyfriend you'll act clingy or obsessive and she won't know how to get rid of you. As it stands she's calling the shots in the relationship, which means you're not leading. Her saying "I don't want a boyfriend now" is putting you on standby until she finds someone she likes better. If you're constantly available for someon…
/r/seduction09/07/11 01:13 AM
2

You're right in recognizing that this is the not the right mindset to have. In actuality, your limiting beliefs and resentment from previous rejections may indirectly reveal themselves through your subcommunication. But I think the more effective way for you to get success in the short term is working on your outer game. As you deal with your limiting beliefs, you should work on developing the proper behaviors and techniques of approaching. In general, the majority of women will not ignore you u…
/r/seduction08/07/11 05:12 PM
1

Thought it's worth emphasizing this quotation: You need to turn yourself from "random guy she had a fun conversation with" to "man she needs to see again." Experienced men know that that comes through Qualification (making her chase you) and Comfort (the right kind of emotional connection). Be the person she's going to want to talk to tomorrow - during her normal life - not just the person who is fun to flirt with when she's hyped up at a bar.
/r/seduction08/07/11 07:01 AM
3

Not a good idea. Don't do it. There's just no redeeming quality to using a sleazy trick. It'll be embarrassing for both you and her. Now, if you want to engage in some flirting, that you can do. "Help, come save me" you say with a wide grin and doing an effortless backstroke. "Oh, you're going to regret it if I drown. You'd at least owe me dinner."
/r/seduction08/07/11 12:30 AM
1

my pleasure. keep at it.
/r/seduction08/07/11 12:18 AM
2

Great question. To a large extent, the two concepts overlap, and that's where the confusion lies. You can't become a better version of yourself without also becoming someone you currently are not. By definition, self-improvement is the process of changing yourself for the better. The question is: Is your transformation causing you to adopt qualities and behaviors that you don't agree with or feel right about? You should feel comfortable and satisfied with the person you become. If it feels overl…
/r/seduction08/07/11 12:13 AM
1

Good for you for getting out there and getting experience. Keep it up! Here are some tips: The women were hesitant because you didn't create superficial comfort, which is making yourself look safe and unarming before approaching (credit: Sinn). This can be accomplished using body language (open over the shoulder), situational opener or neg. Normally, you can open with anything. But for the situation you were in, the one you used may have come off a little odd. What makes her an authority on that…
/r/seduction07/07/11 06:03 AM
28

Trying to become someone I wasn't. For years I acted very outgoing, social, confident, cocky, hilarious, alpha, etc., etc.. basically all the qualities most of the community associates with an attractive alpha male. It made me feel disingenuous with myself. After a while, being someone you're not becomes emotionally tiring. Having those qualities do help, but you don't need to be the most or best at any one of them to have success. Sometimes it's just a matter of tweaking areas where you're weak…
/r/seduction07/07/11 04:40 AM
2

Some solid points here. This is the kind of advice Seddit needs more of: situation specific and broken down rather than something general. Good on you EricDisco. OP, here are some additional thoughts: Qualification. Add qualification to demonstrate you have standards, but also to give her a way to demonstrate value to you. Statement of interest. Why do you find her special? What would make you want to invite her out? If the reason isn't clear to her, she perceives it as you hiding your intention…
/r/seduction07/07/11 03:07 AM
5

First off, I want to say that a "friend" who cockblocks you is not a real friend. Give him a chance to clean up his act. If he doesn't, you don't need him. Possible responses I would use: Hey, I have standards. I'm not that easy. You're being rude. I suggest you stop. (Stern look until he goes away.) Why are you so interested in other people's sex lives? (Turn it around on him.) Why are you acting rude? You're better than that.
/r/seduction05/07/11 08:14 PM
1

My pleasure.. Best of luck.
/r/seduction05/07/11 05:21 PM
3

Is your friend okay with you hooking up with his ex. If not, you must be willing to lose him as a friend. If still decide you want to seduce her, you must NOT be her emotional crutch or else you'll fall into the friend zone. A lot of what you're doing and saying already suggests this is happening. I know it's tempting to be there for her, but this does not build attraction. Stop trying to comfort and console her. Just stop. Invite her out and do something fun. If she brings up negative feelings,…
/r/seduction05/07/11 04:32 PM
8

I admire your gentlemanly intentions, but if she was willing to have sex with a stranger, she doesn't need her first time to be special. More likely, she'll do it with another stranger she's just met as she's already demonstrated the motivation to do so. You were projecting what you thought she wanted on her.
/r/seduction05/07/11 01:42 AM
1

Cross-post IAmA of someone who overcame a decade of social anxiety.
/r/seduction04/07/11 07:11 PM
1

You're absolutely right. When done correctly, you never need to be dishonest or manipulate women. If you try to focus on using the right techniques and tactics to "game" women, even though you may get girls in the short term, they will eventually figure you out and you won't be able to keep them. Not to mention you'd be sacrificing your inner game for short-term results, as you're basically saying to yourself, "I'm not good enough. I need to 'trick' girls into thinking I'm more awesome than I re…
/r/seduction04/07/11 06:36 PM
2

You're dancing a fine line between comfort building and being friend-zoned. She sees some attractive traits in you, but also starting to view you as a friend and doesn't want to lose that, which is why she's conflicted. A mistake you made was to allow her to make the decision about whether or not to be in a relationship. This puts pressure on her to lead the relationship when it should be you who's leading. Ask her to do something casual (don't frame it as a date), then sexualize the interaction…
/r/seduction04/07/11 07:31 AM
2

You get girls to qualify themselves once you've: a) got her attracted to you, and b) demonstrate standards. Your other questions seems to be asking more about how to DHV without coming across as bragging. When a DHV is done overtly with the intent of impressing someone, it becomes bragging, which is unattractive. There's usually an end goal of trying to get someone to like you and fluffing your own ego. Bragging says to the people: I need external validation from others and full of self-importan…
/r/seduction04/07/11 02:17 AM
14

My seduction mentor always said: "Feel the emotion, control the behavior." Stop trying to convince yourself you're feeling confident when you're not. That's a lot of mental effort put in that's distracting and drains your emotional energy. Just acknowledge you feel anxious, then continue doing what you need to do. Recognize that people will like you for many things besides your confidence. When you demonstrate that you're kind, interesting, intelligent, generous, and other value giver traits, yo…
/r/seduction04/07/11 01:05 AM
1

The point I try to make is that height is not something you can permanently change about yourself, so it's not worthy of discussion this forum. On the other hand, working on your game does permanently and dramatically enhance your success because it deals directly with improving your social skills. If you feel like wearing lifts and platforms, power to you. I personally find that acceptance is a faster path to success.
/r/seduction04/07/11 12:39 AM
2

Do tall people have it easier? Yes. Height has been correlated with professional success and attraction. Not sure if the relationship is causal, but that seems to be the implication. However, I don't see this as a worthy topic of discussion. Seddit is about becoming better men and better seducers. Height is not something you can improve on to an appreciable degree and it has almost nothing to do with becoming better socially. Wearing platform shoes is just hiding your own insecurities.
/r/seduction03/07/11 07:47 PM
1

Lived in both Canada and HK, and I'd have to agree with Throwaway. In North America (NA), you're seen as exotic. Asian fetish (a.k.a. "Yellow Fever") is a growing phenomena in NA. I know dozens of male colleagues, friends and acquaintances that prefer Asian women. The preference and attraction is mutual and reinforces the motivation to approach. NA men as a whole are much more willing to cold approach strangers. It's much more acceptable to meet women this way. In HK, men are more likely to appr…
/r/seduction03/07/11 05:34 PM
2

Agreed. What is the point of trying to make a temporary relationship exclusive? Unless you're in an exclusive relationship with her, telling her to stop seeing other guys will not likely work out. I also am ready to leave this girl at this juncture, before I invest anymore. So you'd rather have nothing than "share" her with other guys--a lose-lose situation. Again, this is temporary. What does it matter if she's seeing other guys if you're getting sex? And even if you wanted a deeper, more intim…
/r/seduction02/07/11 02:29 AM
5

Giving her full freedom is coming from a frame of abundance. You're misinterpreting it as he's needy and let's her trample all over him. The full quotation is: If you want her to stay with you, instead of trying to change her, make sure to stay interesting, stay your best self and keep her invested in you. Be yourself… and make yourself happy. You’ll both be happy that way. You've selectively cut out the part where he says "Be yourself... and make yourself happy." By "stay interesting" OP explai…
/r/seduction29/06/11 07:32 AM
4

Lot of wisdom in this post. I hope more people see it. Excellent job Pariah! If she is actively attracted to someone else in front of you, ask her to tone it down. In this case, I would go along with your original suggestion of not making an issue of it. This is particularly true if she doesn't want others to know you two are intimate, for example, if you guys are FB and share a common group of friends. This belongs in the sidebar somewhere, perhaps as an addition to Inner Game.
/r/seduction29/06/11 07:06 AM
1

Thanks for doing this Q&A, Mark! Which thought leaders in seduction (or other arena) has been been the most influential in shaping your current perceptions of seduction/relationships? Which model(s) of seduction (or other field, like psychology) do you find most useful for understanding the essential elements of attraction/seduction/relationships/self-improvement? What widely-accepted community wisdom do you most disagree with? Are the principles/rules/techniques of pick up the same as trying to…
/r/seduction29/06/11 03:40 AM
1

No, you don't need to tell her you're dating other girls. You were not misleading her into thinking you want an exclusive relationship. Relationships are built on mutual agreements. She shouldn't assume monogamy until it is outwardly declared and agreed upon by the other person. At the same time, don't treat her like an exclusive girlfriend if she isn't. You'd be sending her the wrong signals and she'll emotionally assume that you guys are exclusive, even though you did not verbalize it. Althoug…
/r/seduction29/06/11 01:42 AM
1

Thanks for the tip.. didn't realize we had a subreddit.
/r/seduction29/06/11 01:30 AM
1

Thanks for agreeing to do this Q&A, Mark! Which thought leaders in seduction (or other arena) has been been the most influential in shaping your current perceptions of seduction/relationships? Which model(s) of seduction (or other field, like psychology) do you find most useful for understanding the essential elements of attraction/seduction/relationships/self-improvement? What widely-accepted community wisdom do you most disagree with? Are the principles/rules/techniques of pick up the same as …
/r/seduction29/06/11 01:28 AM
2

Do not give her an ultimatum. She's not invested or attracted, so there's nothing for her to lose by taking the "safe" route and saying no. Yes, you need to give girls a reason for your interest in them. That doesn't mean out of the blue directly saying, "I like you because..." It needs to come naturally. Perhaps after she's comfortable and you hit a spike in the conversation, you might say, "You're kinda fun to talk to." and with a smile, teasingly add, "... and not as weird as I originally tho…
/r/seduction29/06/11 01:24 AM
3

she said she doesn't know why i'd want to be friends with her.. Said it seems weird if a person just walks up to you to become friends The answer is right there. You didn't build enough rapport, there was no qualification, or statement of interest. People want to know why you're interested in them. She's sketched out because you weren't transparent in your intentions. With direct game, you tell girls you think they're cute/hot. With indirect game, there's a point where you can genuinely tell a g…
/r/seduction29/06/11 12:44 AM
1

This definitely sounds like a booty call. The meet up and dinner is just a front to get sex. In all honesty, if you play it right you could probably lay her without even doing the dinner, bar, etc. But if you're not used to escalating that quickly the date sets an easier pace to build up to that point.
/r/seduction28/06/11 09:26 PM
14

Fantasizing about your whole life with someone you've only just met, thereby being far too invested at the start of a relationship. This leads to outcome dependence and neediness. Also, being in a sexless relationship with someone in hopes they will eventually change their mind about you. The only reason to keep women in your lives is if you genuinely value them as friends, you're having sex with them, or they hook you up with their friends. Otherwise, you're wasting your time and need to get ou…
/r/seduction28/06/11 09:15 PM
5

Great field report. You've got good self awareness, which helps you analyze your game. Point 4 is perfect. Glad to see fellow TO Sedditors representing. Keep it up!
/r/seduction28/06/11 05:05 PM
1

Stand in a way that is relaxed and comfortable, and open-postured. How do you stand when you're talking with close friends? I use a combination of the ones you depicted, and it changes from moment to moment. Avoid crossed arms though.
/r/seduction28/06/11 06:16 AM
20

The girl was definitely giving you opportunities to open (IOIs). You acknowledge that you messed up, but you're making a lot of excuses for not opening and why it would fail if you did. One of the traps people fall into when they learn game is that they convince themselves they don't know enough and will fail if they don't follow a road map of seduction for any given situation. Saying that you don't know gym game is another excuse you give yourself for not opening. There was a recent post about …
/r/seduction28/06/11 06:04 AM
4

Exactly this. Unless she's a good female friend (i.e., hooks you up with her female friends), then why do you continue staying in a sexless dynamic?
/r/seduction27/06/11 10:48 PM
1

Many of the basics are the same (e.g., kino, leading, qualification). Wherever you go you'll need to calibrate your game to the circumstance. For example, I'm originally from a large northern city before moving down to a small city in a southern state. Girls in the south are much more open and their defenses (i.e., bitch shields) are virtually nonexistent. In this case, you would tone down the teasing, negs and disqualifiers in your game. Direct approaches can be used more often with higher succ…
/r/seduction27/06/11 10:41 PM
4

You nailed it. Community knowledge is a mixed blessing and it is possible to have too much of a "good" thing, especially when you're at the point of over analyzing every interaction. My advice to you is stop learning about pick up and seduction. By now there's very little to be gained by trying to cram more in. You probably know most of it. For the next month or so, go out with the intent of just getting to know people and enjoying their company without an end goal. Let the conversation flow. Fo…
/r/seduction27/06/11 07:55 PM
1

Look up videos by Richard La Ruina (aka Gambler). He's got great material on body language.
/r/seduction27/06/11 05:14 PM
6

All great points. OP, pay attention to point #4: you shouldn't have given her an option. By asking her you make it sound she's the only/main reason you're going out, which puts a lot of pressure on her that this is a date. Instead, lead every interaction with a woman. Make the plans and include her as an afterthought.
/r/seduction26/06/11 11:55 PM
1

Need more details. What are your sticking points? And by hooking up do you mean kissing? Where exactly are things going wrong?
/r/seduction26/06/11 11:41 PM
2

You clever bastard. That line got me laughing as well.
/r/seduction26/06/11 09:33 PM
5

LTR and multiple relationships are different. It was just mis-categorized and needs to be edited. Though I am not sure how people will react to the implicit message that 'you do not seem like the right girl just yet' Frame it as, "It's too early to tell. I'll need to get to know you better." You can add, "I try to make the right choices when it comes to relationship and it's not something I rush into." It communicates you have high standards, which is also an implicit complement to her. Encourag…
/r/seduction26/06/11 08:59 PM
10

"You do this all the time with girls don't you?" Several ways you can address this: Pick a fight. Misinterpret what she says as you having low standards for people you invite to your home or hang out with. "Don't you insult the people I invite to my home. I'm very particular about who I spend my time with. All the girls that come here are intelligent, high quality, beautiful women." Later, when she clears up the misinterpretation and apologizes, say, "I'm glad we got that worked out." Be honest.…
/r/seduction26/06/11 05:25 PM
2

Don't be her therapist, "girlfriend" with a penis, or orbiter. If you're with her, it's with the intention of hooking up, so act like it (i.e., sexually escalate).
/r/seduction26/06/11 05:38 AM
3

Some options: 1) Escalate the playfulness/flirting attitude by grabbing her in your arm and giving her a firm slap on the butt. Deliver it with a smirk and maintain a playful, flirtatious frame, otherwise it comes off as creepy. Tell her, "Just wanted to even the score" or "Naughty girls get punished" or "Nobody touches my balls without sucking them first. Bad, bad girl." :) 2) Assert yourself and avoid trying to out-cocky-funny her. If she crossed one of your boundaries, tell her. In a serious …
/r/seduction26/06/11 05:22 AM
0

Sure. I'll do the ones that are posted right now. Edit: Nevermind. I see ImKumarYo has already done it.
/r/seduction22/06/11 02:26 AM
1

Hey man, really respect the work you do and your message. Many thanks and keep it up. What unique challenges would you say Asian men face when it comes to seduction? What would you recommend to them? Which thought leaders in seduction (or other arena) has been been the most influential force in shaping your current perceptions of seduction/relationships? Which model(s) of seduction (or other field, like psychology) do you find most useful for understanding the core or essential elements of attra…
/r/seduction22/06/11 02:25 AM
1

What unique challenges would you say Asian men face when it comes to seduction? What would you recommend to them? Which thought leaders in seduction (or other arena) has been been the most influential force in shaping your current perceptions of seduction/relationships? Which model(s) of seduction (or other field, like psychology) do you find most useful for understanding the core or essential elements of attraction/seduction/relationships/self-improvement? What widely-accepted community wisdom …
/r/seduction22/06/11 01:01 AM
3

Humor is good, but it only generates one emotional state, whereas attraction and comfort are established by creating a range of emotions. When humor is all you do, you become regarded as one-dimensional -- a source of entertainment and nothing more. Also, humor rarely ever puts women in a sexual mood. Although it may be good as an opener and breaking the ice, you need to sexualize the interaction. You're not there to make her laugh; you're there to give her a sexual experience. Clowns don't get …
/r/seduction20/06/11 05:35 AM
1

Mayson, thanks for your response and taking the time to share your thoughts. I plan to look into some of the authors you mentioned. My focus in the last few years has been developing a deep understanding of LTRs, so I'm always interested in hearing others' perspectives and trying to integrate material from all around. I think there's starting to be a stronger voice in this area, but much of community is still focused on the pick up aspect. Glad to see you're doing your part to further that body …
/r/seduction01/06/11 05:33 PM
1

I'm curious to know what factors had the most developmental impact on your thought process with regard to seduction, relationships, and self-improvement. Which thought leaders in seduction (or other arena) has been been the most influential force in shaping your current perceptions of seduction/relationships? Which model(s) of seduction (or other field, like psychology) do you find most useful for understanding the core or essential elements of attraction/seduction/relationships/self-improvement…
/r/seduction01/06/11 02:34 AM
2

Really appreciate you sharing this summary. Have an upvote!
/r/seduction28/05/11 04:22 PM
1

Here's an interesting talk by Jason Savage that made me think of your post. Maybe you've seen it already. Can be a little abstract, but touches on the topic you raised.
/r/seduction28/05/11 05:49 AM
2

We should have more stock answers like this to copypasta.
/r/seduction28/05/11 12:18 AM
1

Reviews of The Passion Trap are positive. Gonna add this to my read list. Thanks.
/r/seduction28/05/11 12:12 AM
1

On board with you about being at a different point in life and focused on building a LTR. The community lacks a deep understanding of how to create fulfilling relationships. Many mistakenly believe that the conventional techniques used in pick up are equally successful in building relationships. I'd argue otherwise. There is definitely a need for stronger voices in the relationship arena, and I'm glad you're contributing to this body of knowledge. I've spent a number of years studying seduction,…
/r/seduction27/05/11 09:31 PM
40

You've single-handedly answered 50% of the posts on Seddit. Thank you.
/r/seduction27/05/11 09:07 PM
4

Guy here, but: Not trying to hide the fact that you're looking (hiding your intent or sexuality). It's creepy when you try to be discreet by looking away or pretending not to look when she knows you are. Friendly body language (e.g., smiling). Looking at a girl like you're staring intently at your prey is creepy. Mindset: Outcome independence. She's not interested you, no big deal, move on happily along. A creepy person is so invested in the outcome that he comes across as someone who will keep …
/r/seduction27/05/11 05:03 PM
5

You can do all those stereotypically romantic things as long as she's earned it. AFCs do the opposite by trying to buy her love. The more creative you make it, the less it comes off as stereotypical. And the more personal and specific to your relationship you can make it, the more thoughtful it comes across. Random examples "These are so bright and cheerful. They just reminded me of you." which is better than just giving her flowers. (Personal) Inside joke or experiences that you can turn into s…
/r/seduction27/05/11 04:51 PM
1

Video was genuine hilarity. Also, a lot people on Seddit and in FRs ask for advice. I found it refreshing and a rare treat to see an experienced member's ability to transparently analyze his own game, and to do so with such clarity. Keep at it, man.
/r/seduction27/05/11 06:41 AM
1

Asian Playboy's line also comes to mind (paraphrased/butchered): "I realized I talked to the cutest girl in the [store] and didn't introduce myself. Hi, I'm ThrowawayPUA." But the conversational approach you suggested would've probably been my first choice. It's badass in theory but when walking away like there's a fucking explosion behind you (pretty much the definition of badassery) Haha.. thanks for the imagery.
/r/seduction27/05/11 06:26 AM
1

I appreciate your response and clarification. I would still argue against those points, and here's why. I agree that we all want to be sexually attractive to the opposite sex. It's a very general statement, same as we all want to be rich and healthy. But I disagree with the extent to which someone of high value would go to change the perception of someone of lower value. A hot girl gets enough validation that she doesn't need to try to change a loser's mind. The way she would rationalize it is t…
/r/seduction27/05/11 12:42 AM
17

Conventional community wisdom is that you need to be the life of the party, but no. Not true. It's a myth that may never be dispelled. You don't have to the super outgoing, popular, or hilarious either. From one of my earlier posts: You'll find successful players who are funny, social, outgoing, and aloof. At the other end of the spectrum you'll find attractive males who are deep, stoic, and brooding. So you can get success using any one of these archetypes, and everything in between. The reason…
/r/seduction27/05/11 12:19 AM
6

Agreed. Sitting side-by-side or adjacent to a girl is ideal. Your strategy of allowing her to sit first is spot on.
/r/seduction27/05/11 12:09 AM
1

Take point is take it as far as it will go without being forceful or needy. If she says, "Stop", you stop and maybe continue later. But if you start and stop and start again before it gets to that point, she'll feel safer and you'll be in control of the sexual interaction. With each further escalation, take it as a sign you can move to the next level. Gauge her response and calibrate accordingly. Her body language will tell you exactly how comfortable she is with your touch. The only way to know…
/r/seduction26/05/11 10:14 PM
8

You haven't even met her and it sounds like you're already very invested in this non-existent relationship. In actuality, there's lots you don't know about her. The fact that you see potential is good, but do not go into the date with the goal of trying to impress her. That is the wrong mindset that makes most guys come off as needy. Your goal for the date is to find out about her enough to categorize her role in your life (gf, wife, or something else). Qualification can be used in this context.…
/r/seduction26/05/11 08:31 PM
3

If an ugly, fat, socially awkward girl said she didn't want to have sex with you, would that all of a sudden make you attracted to her? Similarly, if a bum or loser said he's glad to be just wanted to be friends with a girl, would that make her want to win his approval. We don't seek sexual approval from people we perceive as low value. To do that creates a strong implication that you are of even lower value. It only works when she perceives at least some value in you. we spend most of our lives…
/r/seduction26/05/11 07:58 PM
2

There are certain male qualities that are inherently attractive to women (dominance, honesty, etc.) but a wide variety of people and personalities can exhibit them. You'll find successful players who are funny, social, outgoing, and aloof. At the other end of the spectrum you'll find attractive males who are deep, stoic, and brooding. So you can get success using any one of these archetypes, and everything in between. The reason why the super social guy is the common archetype in the PU communit…
/r/seduction26/05/11 06:51 PM
1

Your conversations seem friendly, but that's not enough to build attraction. You need to sexualize the context of the interaction through touching and verbalizing your interest and intent. It seems like your conversations are very factual--an exchange of information. Women respond to emotions and you need to provide her with a range of emotions. Also add some push/pull and qualification.
/r/seduction26/05/11 03:31 PM
20

I've said this in another post: Seduction is not a team sport. You don't need to have your friends with you to meet women. There is no real barrier stopping you, only your unwillingness to do so alone. As for meeting people who share an interest in your activities, the options you're left with are: 1) Change your friends' behaviors, or 2) Make new friends. Option 2 is likely the easier and most effective option. Having a variety of friends is a plus, but I wouldn't regard having a close group of…
/r/seduction26/05/11 03:25 AM
1

Wear Clothes that fit or are fitted Congruent with your personality and lifestyle You're comfortable with One (or very few) peacocky items (e.g., watch, jacket, hat) Situation appropriate
/r/seduction25/05/11 07:11 PM
5

Agreed. Once you've been categorized as a friend, most-if not all-of your interactions will be filtered through the lens of "non-sexual, low quality" male. The same line, "I had a dog I really loved when I was young. I still miss him so much" would be interpreted differently depending on how she categorizes you. A girl would interpret a high value male saying that as, "Wow, not only does he have the guts to say something like that, he's also caring and sensitive." OTOH, a low value male saying t…
/r/seduction25/05/11 07:00 PM
76

I think of there being two categories of friends: friends she will have sex with, and those she won't. The line you're suggesting is likely to work for the type of friend she already regards as high value or attractive. The term "friend zone" refers to guys she's categorized as low quality or not attractive. Once she's categorized someone as not sex worthy, it's difficult to change her perception. A real low quality guy who uses that line would still have zero chance of sleeping with her. She wo…
/r/seduction25/05/11 04:41 PM
8

Seduction is about conveying the best parts about you. Here's what it's not: It's not about using PUA lines, teasing/negging, trying to be hilarious or cocky funny, being the most outgiong or social person, peacocking, talking about things you're not interested in, putting on a fascade about who you are, making up a new identity, and so forth. Routines and pick-up lines are training wheels. They're there as examples--things to say so that you have an excuse to get real experience through interac…
/r/seduction25/05/11 06:43 AM
1

There's a myth that you must be the funniest bastard in order to attract girls. There's more ways to attract and connect with people than just humor. You don't need to keep sending her funny texts. You can try getting her to open up and share thoughts, feelings, and experiences she cares about. Some girls are just naturally quiet, and you have to continually lead the conversation and there's probably little you can do. Being rude is just bad policy. I'm not sure what you mean by "most success" w…
/r/seduction25/05/11 01:25 AM
1

Thanks. Wish you success in finding someone special.
/r/seduction25/05/11 12:58 AM
3

Thanks, I appreciate the feedback. :)
/r/seduction25/05/11 12:58 AM
5

Thanks, I appreciate your feedback!
/r/seduction25/05/11 12:51 AM
2

I agree that going back and forth is BS, but that really depends on the expectations and relationship structure they set up. If they decided it was a committed relationship, then you are correct in your statement and OP was leading the guy on. However, we need to find out more before making judgments. OP, what relationship expectations did you have with the guy you were seeing for a month (e.g., FWB, monogamy, open)? In general, if you guys didn't agree to a committed monogamous relationship, th…
/r/seduction25/05/11 12:39 AM
11

I had a similar mindset earlier in my development. When all you see is the ugly, manipulative side of women, that tends to color your perception of all relationships and human interactions. Of course, this is a perceptual error, a defense mechanism, and an over-generalization. I accepted that there are women and men out there who are shallow, manipulative, emotionally unstable, and fake. There are also people who are genuine and real. Recognize that you are responsible for the people you associa…
/r/seduction24/05/11 07:43 PM
1

If you want to find that special girl you eventually want to settle down with, you need to understand what specifically you're looking for in a wife. You have to come up with wife criteria, which is different than criteria for other types of relationships. It should go beyond just "hotter, smarter, sexier". Those are superficial qualities and, depending on what you're after, you may never be satisfied with these things alone. However, you can use them as a starting point or baseline. In addition…
/r/seduction24/05/11 06:44 PM
7

This is just incredible! Thank you so guys for organizing it. :)
/r/seduction23/05/11 02:58 PM
1

Like what?
/r/seduction23/05/11 01:21 AM
3

No, you're right. Let me rephrase that: Always go for a kiss on a date, not only at the end. I'd advise kissing during the the date rather than wait until the end.
/r/seduction23/05/11 12:29 AM
14

Some thoughts Touch her right from the start to get passive compliance to your touch, then escalate from there. The arm around her shoulder felt like a big move because you hadn't escalated beforehand. Make any excuse: "Hey, look at that over there" [arm around shoulder] or "Let me see your watch" [holds her hand]." Sexualize the interaction. The conversation seemed very friendly. Make it sexual. "I didn't notice this before, but you got this hot librarian look going on." Break rapport/push-pull…
/r/seduction22/05/11 11:37 PM
1

I'm surprised you're getting LMR from long-term girlfriends. I've had the opposite experience where once they become LTRs I get zero resistance.
/r/seduction22/05/11 10:58 PM
2

All great points.
/r/seduction22/05/11 06:34 AM
2

You could have done some pre-emptive anti-LMR as well, like backing off for a bit, then continue to escalate. Although I think the massage was not an unreasonable move, it's possible that you broke the state too abruptly. You gave her a moment to think about the situation she was in and make a decision (consent or not). Instead, it should be more natural with no state breaks. No need to verbalize it next time. Just start rubbing her back as you're making out. Then slowly turn her over and massag…
/r/seduction22/05/11 06:22 AM
11

You're desperate. Not much success. Theory's not clicking. It's hell. I've been there, brother. Here are some things that helped me. I hope it helps you too. First, what kind of relationship(s) and lifestyle do you want to have? Partying at clubs? One night stands? Harem? Finding that one special person you want to spend your life with? Whatever that is, that's who you should seek as your seduction guru/mentor. Each person has a specialty (club game, social circle building, LTRs, harem managemen…
/r/seduction22/05/11 06:07 AM
4

Few points You opened a lot of girls, but there didn't seem to be a lot of escalating and attempt to close. Try pushing yourself further into the interaction next time with building more attraction, comfort, isolating, escalating, and so forth. Befriend everyone, including the 4/5 girl. Even if you're not into her, you can show her a good time and she can help build your social proof. You should've continued the conversation with the 8/9. You clearly piqued her interest. It was just a matter of …
/r/seduction22/05/11 12:12 AM
2

Constructs refer to any complex or abstract psychological concept (e.g., motivation, emotion, personality, intelligence, love). Constructs are impossible to measure directly using conventional physical means because they are not concrete materials in the visible world. Instead, we infer that they exist from behaviors that we arbitrarily determine "fit" together. You are correct in suggesting that psychological constructs tend to have biological or physical substrates or correlates (physical mani…
/r/seduction21/05/11 07:01 AM
3

You play a certain role in your group of guy friends: an entertainer. You make them laugh and you get social approval for it. This is one reason why it's difficult to drop our self-assigned roles. I see really two options. One, game by yourself. Or two, make a conscious choice to tone it down--to not be the "funny guy" when you are in the company of women, at least when you are just getting to know them. As they get more familiar with you and your friends, you can give them a heads up on the typ…
/r/seduction21/05/11 03:29 AM
5

The article focuses on deviant or rude behaviors. I sometimes see people confuse what it means to be alpha with these behaviors, but they're not the same. A large part of being alpha is living by your own rules--rules that make sense to you and are congruent with your life philosophy. If this means breaking some conventional societal rule, so be it. You are living with a strong internal compass and that's what makes you attractive to women.
/r/seduction20/05/11 11:16 PM
17

They are psychological constructs. They don't exist per se, but they are convenient ways to categorize behaviors and personalities. Do not equate extroversion with confidence. Extroverts tend to seek stimulation and are more outgoing. They are energized by the company of others. However, you can be a shy extrovert. By contrast, you can have a confident introvert. Introversion and extroversion lie on a continuum, meaning it's not an either/or characteristic. These are natural tendencies, so your …
/r/seduction20/05/11 08:11 PM
2

Tell a story of a time when a girl you were dating or a friend of yours overstepped your boundaries and you walked away. The mindset is "It is better to be respected than to be liked." Pick a fight. If she does something that comes close to crossing one of your boundaries (e.g., constantly negs you, says something insulting, always late), give her a stern look or tell her how you are disappointed in her actions--anything that tells her you won't tolerate this type of behavior.
/r/seduction20/05/11 04:47 AM
8

My seduction mentor/guru.. the guy that taught me to be the man I am today, he was always severely overweight. It was his biggest struggle his entire life, something that to this day he has not overcome. But that didn't stop him from becoming phenomenal at seduction and having a harem of 5 women at one point. Neither did it stop him from having threesomes as well as regular LTRs. I applaud you for trying to be more fit. If you want to get this part of you handled first that's up to you. But bein…
/r/seduction20/05/11 04:40 AM
1

You are over-thinking the details and creating this elaborate plan on how to meet this girl under these ideal circumstances. No wonder you're acting nervous. Not to mention you've waited until the last day of classes. You've made this out to be a huge deal when it shouldn't be. Even if you did approach her, there's a good chance you would come off as needy. Here's a starting point: start talking to every girl. Make this your new habit. Don't discriminate based on looks or status. Once you can do…
/r/seduction19/05/11 07:11 PM
5

Agree with fungus. Try not to overanalyze every single detail of your life in PUA contexts. It's not all black and white. It's okay to show affection, love, and generosity. These are not beta qualities. Being alpha is not a constant attempt to evaluate who likes who more. It's about having a strong frame and leading the interaction. Nothing in this video gives the impression that the guy is doing otherwise. It often comes down to calibration. Yes, it's not usually the best idea to put a lot of e…
/r/seduction19/05/11 03:15 PM
5

Seddit isn't a dick measuring contest. Your comment adds nothing to the conversation.
/r/seduction19/05/11 05:26 AM
3

It's really nice to see how a community like this can change people's lives for the better. And this post is a reminder. I'm positive it's what motivates many of us--old and new--to continue contributing to this subreddit. I know it's the primary reason why I feel so strongly to give back. If you think about it, we're here helping one another further develop our ability to achieve happiness, love, and success. What can be more meaningful than that? So thank you, too, for your sincere appreciatio…
/r/seduction18/05/11 06:30 AM
1

Thanks for taking the time to critically look at the matter. I appreciate your thoughtful question and feedback. :)
/r/seduction18/05/11 06:14 AM
9

If they're willing to get in the bed with you half naked and make out, that's a clear indication they're willing to be sexual with you. They're brushing your hand away and turning to avoid seeming easy (see ASD and how to overcome LMR). It's natural for women to give token resistance. You just need to be more assertive and push forward. You should be the one in control of the sexual escalation. You should be the first one to back off a little before escalating again. Kind of like two steps forwa…
/r/seduction18/05/11 03:48 AM
2

One way to gain/gauge commitment is to say, "On a scale of 1 to 10, what is the chance that you'll definitely be there or not flake" (Credit: David D?). Her: "Oh, I'll definitely be there." You: "Good, I'm not a fan of people who can't keep their word."
/r/seduction17/05/11 09:02 PM
1

There was a similar post last week (See responses). When guys get in relationships if he pushes for the relationship first the women often feels pressured into it and yet again he is more invested. What's important is that she earns your attention. It's okay to push for the relationship first (you're a man, you lead the relationship) as long as she's earned it. Women NEED to be the one more invested in the relationship and if they are not she will begin losing attraction for you. She must feel l…
/r/seduction17/05/11 08:50 PM
2

Trying to recall information or remembering something is a different skill and matter than applying the information. The theory you learn should help guide your behaviors, but they are often a simplistic representation of the world. Real-world situations are always more complex. What you gain through in field interactions is the experience to make sense of the theories and the calibration to adjust the theories according to each situation. Yes, you could learn an extensive amount of information …
/r/seduction17/05/11 07:47 PM
1

I think it's a cute game to play as a joke, flirt, and set the frame that you're the selector. It sounds like there was a point where its purpose was dried up from overuse. It's like if you did the "Pull my finger" joke a few times, it can be funny. If you keep doing it, it gets old. Then she'll maybe just humor you if she's still attracted to you. I think she's honestly telling you it's odd. I'd either drop it or use it more sparingly if you're both still amused by it.
/r/seduction17/05/11 03:53 AM
1

Really great job afungi! I've been studying this stuff for longer than most people and I still feel I've walked away with something. I liked your discussions on the qualities of a high value, attractive male. You guys summarized it quite nicely. Also good work exposing some of the "ugly" aspects of relationship that are important (like being honest no matter what). I think the challenges of relationships are not always given enough attention, but it's good that you guys address them here. Keep i…
/r/seduction17/05/11 03:29 AM
1

Please read my response to frogma. In short, you need to calibrate the type of qualification to the situation. Much of pick up is geared on first time encounters. This is a guide to qualification that can extend beyond those situations and allow you to build successful relationships beyond the initial lay. Its focused on relationship management in general, not just the pick up.
/r/seduction16/05/11 09:12 PM
3

Thanks for your input frogma. I agree with what you say. I think it's a matter of taking the context of the specific interaction into consideration. The reason behind the categories is to calibrate the qualification based on the situation. For many PUAs who run club game, the kind of qualification they do would be the lowest level (e.g., one-night stands). As you said, they just want to know if the girl is good enough (or not crazy, bitchy, etc.) to bring home for sex. And as Tofu said, the qual…
/r/seduction16/05/11 07:34 AM
2

If she was not interested in you before, she categorized you as "just a friend". This will be the same image she'll have in her mind when you meet her. However, since there was a break of time, she'll be more willing to accept that you did change (to become a high value male), and categorize you as someone she's willing to have sex with (i.e., out of the friend zone). She might not have seen you as someone she can be sexual with, which is why now you must lead the sexual interaction. Be sure to …
/r/seduction16/05/11 07:02 AM
2

Excellent point.
/r/seduction16/05/11 05:29 AM
1

Thanks for your interest. Qualification can accomplish several things, like build compliance, DHV, break rapport, and categorization. I'd argue that the last point is the most important and should be your primary use of qualification. You want to find out what kind of relationship you can have with this girl (e.g., not worth seducing, one night stand, FWB, open relationship, LTR). In order to do that, you need to create criteria for each of these. Start off by qualifying a girl on the lowest lev…
/r/seduction16/05/11 02:21 AM
2

It sounds like your priorities have shifted. You're looking for something more, as you say "a meaningful relationship" with a special girl. You need to start qualifying girls more heavily based on your standards for an LTR. What are the core qualities, traits, values, and behaviors do you seek in a girl that's worthy of being in an LTR? Write these down. Continue meeting women and setting up dates, then test them on these criteria. Categorize them on what kind of relationship you can have with t…
/r/seduction15/05/11 07:33 PM
6

Here are some points about your interaction with your target. I was just heading out and I realized I didn't even get the Asian woman's phone number. First, you did not build up enough attraction from your previous encounter or when you were heading out. Second, referring to her as the "Asian women" may have been perceived as creepy. Third, you can't make it obvious that you're hitting on someone at their workplace. Women don't want to be perceived as easy in front of their coworkers. You must d…
/r/seduction15/05/11 06:35 AM
5

Respect. Keep up the good work, scalcave!
/r/seduction15/05/11 03:52 AM
1

OP, what areas of seduction are you having trouble with? What is your current level of skill? It may be helpful to identify what areas you can improve to take you to the next level. Seduction skills--like anything else--is a combination of your perceptions, behaviors, and attitude. Let us know where you'd like help in. But after a few days/weeks of positive results I get complacent and then revert back to old habits. What are reasons you get complacent? Do you feel as though you've hit a plateau…
/r/seduction14/05/11 11:55 PM
10

Here are some thoughts. Her friends are essentially all watching this operation like hawks. She glances a few times at them and smiles nervously as if to say, "I don't know why this is happening either!" Isolate her. She doesn't want to appear too easy in front her of friends. Those glances are not a good thing. One of the reasons why she would've flaked out. If you isolate her you wouldn't need to game her group of friends. Isolation is also a good compliance test. Qualify her. Run comfort phas…
/r/seduction14/05/11 11:33 PM
5

Need more context and history between you two to make a judgment. For example, is she attracted to you? What is the nature of your previous interactions? However, here are some possible scenarios. If she likes you, this may just be her flirting with you. At the time, you could've humored, teased her, and played along as a way of flirting back. The other benefit to just playing along for a bit is that she doesn't get embarrassed if you confront her in front of her friends. If she's not really fli…
/r/seduction14/05/11 02:59 AM
2

Thanks. Glad I could help!
/r/seduction14/05/11 02:30 AM
1

This is important context. Be sure to include this relevant information next time. The reason she's upset is that you left the other girls is for based on this kind of thinking: "If you're willing to do that to them, when are you going to do that to me?" She wants to know that you won't leave her after sex, that you want to stick around. One way you do that is communicating to her what she gives you that no other woman can. What makes her special? The strongest reasons are those that are not bas…
/r/seduction14/05/11 02:26 AM
1

It's my pleasure. And thank you for sharing your story.
/r/seduction13/05/11 07:16 PM
29

If you get the sense that they're attracted to you, start building comfort. One downside with building too much attraction is that women may perceive you as being out of their league, which may be what's happening to you. When this happens, she'll question why you want to be with her. You should disqualify yourself so that they see you as attainable. By disqualify I don't mean make yourself look like an ass or completely blowing yourself out of the water. I mean you need to show that you are hum…
/r/seduction13/05/11 07:04 PM
5

really want to build strong relationships from it. As you said, PU is great for getting to know particular types of women at particular types of environments (mostly clubs/bars, but not always). But the mindset, skills, tactics, and attitudes common in the PU community are incompatible with monogamous LTRs. Monogamous LTRs are built on foundations of trust, honesty, open communication, safety, security, dominance, and so forth. There are certain attractive behaviors that overlap with the PU worl…
/r/seduction13/05/11 05:43 PM
3

Being labeled as a player is not always a good thing. It's good if you want to establish social proof and get a bunch of hook-ups. Being desired by other women is attractive. The problem arises when you want to finally settle down with one girl. She will not trust that you can be monogamous, and your player status will harm your ability to take the relationship further. First, you must be clear with yourself what kind of relationship you want with this woman. Monogamous? Long-term? Open? Harem w…
/r/seduction13/05/11 05:09 PM
2

The video demonstrates that the opener doesn't really matter. And it was clearly was done to be funny. But please don't equate this sort of ass-clownery to good seduction. Also notice how completely unnatural their behavior is. They spit lines from rote. Their approach lacks connection, authenticity, or any real human emotion.
/r/seduction13/05/11 06:01 AM
4

That's my beef with much of the advice here. It's superficial stuff like "show me your game face!" or "fake confidence" Here's the problem I have with most of the advice presented. To paraphrase, it goes something like this, "Man up!" or "Inner game that shit!" or "Stop having such a wussy mindset!" or "Stop thinking about it and just f-ing do it!" Recognize that while this mindset may work for certain people at a certain level in their game, it does not apply equally well to everyone. From the …
/r/seduction13/05/11 05:42 AM
1

Heh.. I like that response. Implies uniqueness and strong control of the frame. Another possible response could be: "You better hurry, the line is forming. But just for you I'll consider giving permission to cut the line. ;)" This line addresses a number of emotional needs: Implies uniqueness (you're special enough that I give you permission to come to the front of the line) Shows dominance (non-supplicating) Reveals honesty (he's willing to admit there are potentially other girls) Implies socia…
/r/seduction12/05/11 07:12 AM
32

Okay, we understand the importance of not being needy, but this statement really skews that concept to an extreme. I recognize that this may be a result of guys trying to adopt a mindset that is the total opposite of an AFC/beta. Guys think, "When I was an AFC, I totally cared about a girl and I got shit on. That must mean the only way to get her attracted to me is to not give a shit." Hence, this lines becomes the cornerstone of many's seduction philosophy. This is a really big misconception I …
/r/seduction12/05/11 03:42 AM
1

Thank you for your response and reasoned discussion on this issue. Although we all tend to study the same material, I believe Seddit is the ideal forum for sharing ideas and being open to different perspectives that we may not be used to. Let me share my perspective. She wants to know why she is special compared to other girls. There are situations where the woman actually wants to know why she is special to you. Sometimes it's an overt statement; and sometimes there's an underlying motivation o…
/r/seduction12/05/11 02:25 AM
1

Tofu, mad respect. Your skills speak for themselves. This is nothing short of epic. Congrats, man! I would like to point out that a seducer of Tofu's experience and skill is capable of "breaking" a few of the attraction principles without serious harm to his game. Clearly, his control of the frame, dominance, and sexuality sealed the deal with woman he met in club and texted. However, for those who are less experienced, I would like to point out a few places I believe Tofu could have done differ…
/r/seduction11/05/11 07:27 PM
1

Being unemployed may mean that you won't be able to afford attending venues that require a lot of money, but as Tofu said, there are plenty of alternatives that don't cost much at all. Gaining experience is not limited to bars and clubs. Whenever you hit a roadblock ask yourself, "Is unemployment a tangible obstacle, or a limiting belief?" The second point you addressed is about your approach, rather than your status as unemployed. I agree that natural conversations are easier to pull off. And i…
/r/seduction10/05/11 06:29 PM
1

Thank you for your comment. It definitely made me think hard about this topic and whether our viewpoints can be consolidated/differentiated. My understanding is that push/pull is the act of showing varying levels of interest and disinterest. For example, telling a girl she's so cute that it makes you sick, or giving her attention and then doing a takeaway. If my interpretation of push/pull is correct, I would say that simply showing interest and disinterest (real or feigned) limits the range of …
/r/seduction10/05/11 08:04 AM
1

I appreciate the question from such an experienced member like yourself. Here are a few examples: Telling a story. E.g., Time you lost your dog (sadness) and spent hours looking for him in the woods at night (courage). You then eventually find footprints (hope) that lead you to your dog (joy). Being honest. Communicating your relationship boundaries will likely make her feel indignant or mad, but it will also make her feel respect for you, which creates an emotional range. Because you are lettin…
/r/seduction10/05/11 06:14 AM
3

Avoid conversations about her ex-boyfriend or her sad feelings. If she brings them up simply tell her, "Stop. When you're with me, we have fun." If you listen to her problems, you automatically get friend-zoned. I also suggest you plan a date or a fun evening out. If you meet at a bar, tell her you've got a few other things planned and take her to those places. Get her out of the mindset that this is a pity party and actually show her a good time. I would avoid teasing her that she is using you …
/r/seduction10/05/11 01:46 AM
2

I see you raise two primary issues: (1) you resent the belief/fact that a man's job is to pursue women, and (2) you feel learning pick-up requires you to change in ways that aren't congruent with your self image. Let me address them. (1) Culturally and socially-speaking, men are expected to do the pursuing. Biologically, women are hard-wired to respond to men who show these dominant and masculine behaviors, in the same way that men are hard-wired to respond to women who are more feminine (not al…
/r/seduction10/05/11 01:15 AM
2

Without more information and examples of this irrational behavior, it's hard to pinpoint the exact issue. But here are my thoughts. It's possible that the people you associate with are as you describe: irrational, contradictory, and self-serving. In this case, you should be more discerning about the type of people you hang with. But I get the sense that the issue is more deep-seated than who you associate with, as you perceive most - if not all - women as "crazy". First, accept that people in ge…
/r/seduction09/05/11 11:49 PM
3

When you're involved in a LTR, especially a monogamous one, there are certain expectations. One is that you are loyal to one another and do not flirt with people outside of the relationship. If she flirts with this guy and tells you she's doing so, you need to put a stop to it. Clearly communicate your boundaries (what is acceptable and not in your relationship together) if you haven't done so already. She may not like what you have to say, but at least she will respect you for it. You know the …
/r/seduction09/05/11 11:03 PM
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