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redandswollen Archive

View 0 posts and 194 comments by redandswollen on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

I'll add that relationships aren't some magic pill for happiness, and many men in relationships wish they'd never met the woman they're with
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:12 AM
–

So, ladies, what are you going to do about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:08 AM
–

There's power in being a victim
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 07:55 PM
-2

Idk, in my 40s I date 10-15 years younger, on average. Granted, I kept myself fit and I have a 'sexy' career. If exercise, nutrition, hygiene, humor and career success are signs of a cult, I guess i'm in a cult haha
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 07:52 PM
3

Yeah, my ex quit her high-paying job so she could get more support in the divorce, while she had a boyfriend on the side. Strong independent woman lol
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:35 PM
2

Kinda sounds like you're upset that you were born a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:33 PM
1

If you have 100k for a good attorney and custody evaluations
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:27 PM
–

Man, I hear you. My ex was a high earner, but quit her job when she moved in with her rich boyfriend. Now I have the privilege of paying their mortgage
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 03:48 PM
1

Hey, I'm a feminist and i believe in equal rights and responsibilities. Equal pay for equal work. Moms, go to work and stop mooching off men
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 02:32 PM
3

Yeah idk dude. It’s frustrating for sure when you’re not getting laid, but do you really want a relationship with most women? I guarantee once you get in one you’ll be like most guys— wondering what all the hype is about. She’ll try to change you into someone you’re not. Some idealized fantasy she has, and when she finds out you’re exactly who you said you are, she’ll blame her dissatisfaction on you. YMMV though
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 08:02 AM
10

A lot of people don't have a good support network, so they try to get all their emotional needs by a partner. It's not realistic, and emotions are so subjective. It's usually a moving target when someone has a lot of anxiety
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 08:11 PM
26

Sometimes I think we label people 'avoidant' if they don't want to be subject to your emotional whims.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 08:04 PM
1

I agree men want to be the object of a woman’s love, and when kids enter into the picture it can shake your identity. I disagree about the fathering part. Men have an instinct to provide and protect, in a different but complementary way to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 03:23 PM
6

Men want to be partners. They just don’t want to be a therapist to someone who nags them all day
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 01:19 PM
2

Isn’t it an “male and female” loneliness epidemic then? If men aren’t partnering that means women aren’t as well, unless they’re doing some polygamy thing. Look, it’s a bell curve. The majority of people end up partnering up at some point in their lives. But yes that large middle part is shrinking for whatever reason. Some of it is due to rigid individualism on the part of both sexes. Some of it is feminism that’s convinced women they need a “partner” who’s more of a therapist than a man. And so…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 01:01 PM
8

Women don't even know what they want lol. They're attraction comes from a general feeling that's often hard to articulate. Just put yourself together as best as you can and see what happens! Also I wouldn't be so anxious to make yourself into someone you're not. Even if you land a woman odds are that you'll still be unhappy, since you have to work on happiness internally. And in a relationship you have the added stress of managing a woman's emotions.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/25 06:02 PM
1

Yeah and some guys gotta go the sugar daddy route just to get a little affection. No amount of money makes up for a shitty/awkward personality. But if you have no social skills, you better maximize your career or you have no chance
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/25 10:02 PM
3

On average women want to partner with men who are more successful. Sure there's outliers, but they're the minority. Whether it's cultural or biologic idk, but the association is clear. This doesn't mean they don't date or have fun with broke surfer bums, but usually they don't make a life with them
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/25 09:45 PM
2

Sorry to hear that. Hang in there
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:20 PM
4

It's often easier for kids to go along with what mom wants because they don't want to deal with her emotions either
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 04:40 PM
8

Hope that mentality is working out for you in real life. Fact is most women want men to foot the bill
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 11:46 PM
7

If you're financially stable hit me up lol. I'm tired of broke bitches
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 11:45 PM
12

If they're going to expect men to take care of finances it's fair men should expect women to be nurturing or feminine or whatever
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 10:37 PM
6

Isn't having to fight for custody=uphill battle? I feel like we're saying the same thing. As for what people do when they have their kids, that's a different topic
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:29 PM
3

It's an uphill battle for men to get more than minimum statutory parent time-- even if they're decent dads. I don't fault men for walking away. Many don't have the money to fight and it's heartbreaking
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:17 PM
-2

God, I'd give my left nut for a woman who's financially independent and emotionally stable. That said, I bring intelligence, finances, fitness, an adventurous lifestyle, humor, and emotional support.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 09:57 PM
1

Well now who's projecting? I'd love to find a woman who's agreeable and earns as much as I do
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 05:32 PM
-1

Where are these unicorns that don't care about a man's education and income?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 05:41 PM
10

Dude you sound like an amazing human being
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 04:26 PM
4

I imagine everyone is different. I personally don't want a traditional, stay at home wife because (as much as I romanticize the idea of a leave it to beaver life) she'd be too much of a long term financial liability. So to me, a high value woman is someone in her early 30's, physically fit, outdoorsy, intelligent, assertive, kind, warm, educated, and has free time to adventure. And who apologizes from time to time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 02:56 PM
1

Ding ding ding. The divorce industry is parasitic and THRIVES on extracting as much as possible from men.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 08:54 PM
0

Eh, the days I spend taking care of my kids are a welcome respite from my high-stress job
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 08:53 PM
2

I'm done having kids, but that's what I recommend to the young guys coming up.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 07:04 PM
3

It's such a lose/lose situation for men. Earn more than your wife and you'll be on the hook for alimony and child support when she bolts. Earn less and your odds of divorce are even higher.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 05:14 PM
1

You can't force someone to work who doesn't want to
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 03:21 PM
–

This is why a prenup or postnup should be mandated before you can get married, so the couple can work it out beforehand, when times are good
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:25 PM
-2

Spot on! One year my ex made 400k, then quit because she was "stressed". I was like, cool I make plenty so stay home. Well, she spent the next 18 months planning a divorce and cheating on me. Now I pay her a shit ton of alimony. So anyone arguing to "marry someone who makes the same as you" or "just help with the kids" you can go ahead and live in that fantasy world. Fact is, men get the short end of marriage no matter what.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:18 PM
2

Fortune favors the bold!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 10:44 PM
–

I didn't see a single physician on that website
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 04:03 PM
–

It's more than weight-- it's the fact that someone should value themselves, and the relationship, enough to stay attractive and fit. Sure, have some grace and patience and try to be a cheerleader for your partner, but if they're a slug who eats shit all day thats not someone I want to live with
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 03:35 PM
-2

I'll add that genuine attraction only applies to men. Rich guys don't date ugly women. Broke, attractive guys don't date rich ugly women. If a man is committed to you-- that's a rock solid guarantee he thinks you're attractive
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/25 12:52 AM
11

Well, I married a hot, young, professional woman when we were in our 20s. She divorced me, cleaned me out financially, and married another guy that makes more. And I make a grip of cash. So I have a hard time believing in 'genuine attraction'. ALL women want a man who is successful financially. It's the price of admission
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/25 12:42 AM
1

Ive done this at different times. You just gotta find women who don't expect much out of you
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 05:32 PM
–

Brother, I was standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon contemplating sailing into the abyss. At that moment I prayed to some higher power, didn't hear shit, and realized it was up to me to unfuck my mental state. Sure, tools I learned in therapy made a little difference, but at the end of the day it was all up to me to get back up.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 03:31 PM
–

The manosphere (in its best iteration) preaches personal responsibility, which Trump's policies will necessitate. I know we live in an unfair society, but at the end of the day it's up to everyone to take responsibility for the hand they're dealt. I got cleaned out by the family court system, and I spent my fair share of time wallowing about how unfair the system is to men, but my life changed when I finally took accountability for my actions, and realized that the system is fucked-- but I don't…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 03:15 PM
11

Life is a grind no matter what you do (unless you partner up with someone who takes care of you). But I agree-- if you're doing it all for women the juice isn't worth the squeeze
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 08:35 PM
14

wtf? Redpill at it's core is realizing that women want to sleep with you if you're attractive and make a good living, and they'll take half your shit when they're tired of the relationship. I don't have the energy to try to manipulate someone
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 07:43 PM
10

Sometimes women go for the 'safe' guy. But they also aren't attracted to depressed losers.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 04:08 PM
10

What stands out to me are the incompatibilities in shared values. It's hard making any marriage work, let alone when you two have different life goals. Alos, I know we all want a hottie but after marrying one, and dating several, I'll take a kind, stable 7/10 any day
/r/askMRP28/01/25 08:55 PM
4

Totally agree. I'll add that redpill is great info for getting laid-- not so much for maintaining relationships in this day and age.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/25 07:52 PM
0

I'll agree women 30-39 are tricky, especially if they want a baby. Those women apply the PRESSURE!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/25 07:48 PM
-2

They should go after whoever they want. A lot of men don't want to take on the responsibility of someone else's kid, but some guys don't mind
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 09:52 PM
-1

I would think that single moms who date attractive, high earners are going to be more disappointed, unless they find a diamond in the rough. Marketable men are going to have more options. But that's just my theory
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 08:53 PM
9

You have to differentiate between 'confident' and 'domineering'. Men don't want a woman that nags and badgers
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 02:54 PM
-1

2nd. But she's got to be a little submissive. A domineering woman is a major pain in the ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/25 08:40 PM
33

Women on reddit are definitely not representative of women in real life. Women on reddit are disproportionately neurodivergent, hyper-feminist, liberal, intolerant, and 'traumatized'. If you're a young man making his way in the world, get outside and talk with real people no matter how you look or what you do for work. The real world is infinitely better than reddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 08:10 PM
–

You're one of the good ones!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 08:57 PM
-4

When you make enough money, all women are going to be leeches one way or another, even if you really love them.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 04:25 PM
1

That's hot enough. 10's are just 8's with good makeup game. Not saying I'd marry her. Definitely wouldn't have kids with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 04:23 PM
2

I'd keep her as an option if she's hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 03:38 PM
1

I'd love to find a woman with a similar lifestyle of outdoor adventure, but they're few and far between. So I'm happy to have someone who is affectionate and doesn't mind if I spend a week out in the desert with my buddies.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 06:34 PM
2

Idk, we had some good years. I initially liked how she was fairly athletic and would get outside with me. But a lot of relationships have an expiration date
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 05:32 PM
0

This is how I started out with my ex-wife. But even then I had to curtail my normal hobbies to make them suitable for her skill level. I wouldn't have done that if I wasn't interested in her romantically.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 04:40 PM
-6

Shoot, if a woman my same age stops having sex with me I'm finding another person. Doesn't matter the age
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 11:57 PM
1

I actually prefer the maturity and stability of older women, but it's a total turn off when they get jealous of younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 10:50 PM
–

This scenario ruined my marriage
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 05:22 PM
5

I'm above average in looks, career, etc and dating apps still only match me with common bridge trolls
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 04:59 PM
1

Shoot, if I find a woman who has the cash to split checks I'd marry her in a heartbeat
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/24 08:00 PM
3

Guys don't usually care how much money a woman makes. In fact, if they're too busy to date because they have a career that's a turn off
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/24 09:15 PM
3

If she's living off her ex I wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 10:18 PM
3

That's awesome man! You're indeed very lucky
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 10:12 PM
12

I love attractive 40+ women. If they're still hot at at age, they'll likely stay hot. Plus they're more mature and don't sweat the small stuff that younger women complain about. They have realistic expectations about life and relationships, as they've usually experienced some heartache. And, yeah, they want a guy who works out and makes money, and why shouldn't they?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 07:31 PM
15

Pre-marriage I had some interest from women, but not a ton. Post-divorce, when my income went up significantly, I put on some muscle, learned some social skills, and grew my hair out, I had so much pussy I didn't know what to do with it. I finally settled down after banging maybe 75 women.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/24 09:48 PM
2

If feminists really mattered, they wouldn't have to be so shrill. Who cares if they dehumanize men? Men make the world go round. Most people who are actually making a difference in the world, quietly go about their work. They build, they create, they make life happen. Feminists and other victims whine and complain because they are powerless.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 08:10 PM
–

It's more than a matter of 'asking'. Lawyers, custody evaluations, etc often go into the 100s of thousands of dollars.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 04:49 PM
1

men be ballin
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 04:17 AM
–

Yes, with one exception. I've seen women who do nothing but talk shit about each other bond over how to screw men over.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 04:25 AM
–

You can break a man's nose one day, and the next you're friends again. As long as he has some reason to trust you, or a shared goal or hobby, repairing the relationship is fairly easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 03:18 AM
4

Oooo I like this argument. I don't really disagree with you on this point. Women and men are often happier when they are single. My main counter is that biologically/neurologically we do better when we are accompanied with a partner. Our nervous systems just do better when another human touches it regularly. And for whatever reason, casual sex just doesn't scratch the same itch. Long term pair bonding makes us happier. I wish it was different. I can't stand the idea of having a woman in my space…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 02:06 AM
0

Well, the courts only look at finances so that's the standard we have right now
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 10:50 PM
1

Relationships are never 50/50. If you expect that you'll be unsatisfied
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 09:48 PM
-2

Someone (relatively) hot who is kind to us and doesn't take our money or kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 09:46 PM
20

Good point! Boys pick on other boys to establish some sort of pecking order. If you can't take a joke, well, you're going to have one hell of a hard time in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 05:38 PM
3

I think Freud had something to say about the source of this envy
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 05:36 PM
1

During my marriage I used to daydream about dating a mediocre, overweight woman who didn't spend all day busting my balls. But once I started dating again I realized that wasn't sustainable. I need someone interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 03:31 PM
2

Either way-- taking pussy off the pedestal would free men up to work on immigration too. Or to do the jobs that immigrants do that americans won't
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 03:12 PM
0

hahaha
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 11:35 AM
9

Men get so wrapped up in trying to make women happy that they put more productive pursuits aside. Often it's because of an unaddressed mother wound.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 03:16 AM
0

From what I've seen, and I'm in my 40s, is that men don't have a problem saying no early on, but over time the wife wears him down. Some compromise is always needed in a relationship but the stereotype of the nagging wife perpetuates for a reason. Shoot, go back and read "Rip Van Winkle". The whole story is about a guy who was being henpecked so he went on a hike with his dog and drank some gnomes' beer then slept for 20 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 10:48 PM
1

I agree. Often, though, they're already married, with a couple kids, and building her that dream home is easier than getting a divorce. Some women you just can't say 'no' to
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 10:37 PM
6

I agree with that-- most builders want to luxury homes because the margins are better. Again, and I'm not trying to throw shade at women, wives are often driving the decision to get a bigger house and fill it with furniture. If men focused more on the issue at hand-- in this case, what's a reasonable home?-- you'd probably have some attainable starter homes.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 10:26 PM
7

Visitation isn't the same as being a parent.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 10:06 PM
25

Right now, in the US, the most urgent issue is increasing the housing supply. So we need more builders.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 10:05 PM
64

Less focus on pleasing women, and more focus on improving the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 09:40 PM
11

ALL women in modern society have the potential to take your kids and leave you penniless. It's just the way governments operate. Most people, men and women included, will take free money when it's offered.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 09:33 PM
1

You're not wrong. Luckily most women are attracted to a man with ambition so they'll latch onto someone who they see is going places.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 02:51 PM
1

Your physique, career, and interpersonal skills are within your control
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/24 07:52 PM
2

If you can manage the illness and hold down a job you'll still do ok in the dating world. I've met a lot of compassionate women over the years.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 03:49 PM
0

They can, but it's harder for them to get fit. Testosterone is a helluva hormone
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 03:32 PM
13

Live your life how it feels best to you! If you don't want to be promiscuous, you shouldn't be. I think you'll find a lot of women who like to take relationships slower.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 02:20 PM
0

It's usually the personality type of the successful woman. While there's some exceptions, boss babes are impossible to please
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 01:50 PM
1

When I have my kids I stay home with them and don't work. When they're at school I go to the gym, shop, cook, and clean up a little. It's way easier than going to work
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 12:31 PM
0

I don't disagree that for some men it's impossible. If you're an ugly troll, life with be harder. But most women want a companion, who will stick with them through thick and thin. And fat, ugly girls need love too.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 01:19 AM
-3

I'll also add that women have almost no control over their careers. Whether it's the patriarchy or their own lack of ambition, i don't know. But women aren't overcrowding the top 1%.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 12:12 AM
0

Nah, it's so easy as a guy. Get fit, get (relatively) rich, and learn how to be a decent human being. If you're a girl, society makes you think you have to be EVERYTHING. If a girl can pull her head out of the collective ass, yeah, it's easy. But if she's caught up in the world she's going to have a hard time. And being beautiful is 99% of the battle
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 12:10 AM
-6

It's way easier as a man. Women care about (1) financial success (2) emotional support (3) physical attraction. Men have the advantage in that they can control their career trajectory, physical fitness, and emotional capacity. If you're an average dude, you can go to more school, get more certifications, or learn entrepreneurial skills and earn $$$. You can read all the self help books, go to therapy, and have a few starter relationships to learn how to listen, validate, and generally co-exist w…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 10:52 PM
1

I totally agree that a family should be communal. When it falls apart, though, the lazy half shouldn't be rewarded for attaching to a winner. If you want a nice life, make it happen on your own. Don't mooch off someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 09:50 PM
2

If she has an escape fund she can start paying half the bills
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 11:32 PM
1

For this to work you'd have to quantify the value of 'unpaid' work. You shouldn't get paid more just because you happen to be married to someone with drive and ambition. My ex wife got paid plenty by the divorce court for sitting around the house getting laser hair removal and cheating with a guy down the road.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 11:15 PM
1

I was married to a physician and the constant competitive attitude was exhausting. She always had to be right about everything. I just want someone easy to be around. If you make a lot of money, great. If you don't make any money, great. I like being a provider.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 06:56 PM
1

I appreciate that this sub allows the most freedom of speech of any sub I'm encountered on reddit
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 11:16 PM
1

My mom loved my ex-wife, so there's a huge lapse in judgement on everyone's part
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 11:15 PM
6

Haha I found that the 25-30 year olds, while tons of fun, have unrealistic expectations about life. I like women who have experienced some disappointment.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/24 05:36 PM
10

My GF is in her mid 40s and she's hot by any standard. After dating some girls in their 20s and 30s I decided I liked the maturity of a woman with some life experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/24 05:34 PM
7

I enjoy being a father. It's hard work but it's made me a better person.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/24 10:47 PM
17

You probably need to strategize on how to minimize the damage when (not if) she leaves. Help her find a job and start spending more time with your kids. Document everything you do with them so there's no doubts about you getting 50/50. Meanwhile, STFU to her. She's not your friend anymore. Not your confidante. She'll soon be the most dangerous person in your universe.
/r/askMRP18/09/24 07:18 PM
1

You rolled the dice and got lucky. No amount of preparation can save you from a wife that decides to destroy your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/24 07:01 PM
2

We all do better if we have a supportive companion. In some ways it's easier to be single, but our nervous systems are regulated with physical companionship.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/24 04:32 PM
2

This is probably one of the cases where you need to truly STFU and lift. Just shut up and work on yourself. Like others said, figure out why you're having so much anxiety. You probably need to see a therapist or get on some meds for anxiety. If you divorce, she'll just keep jerking you around forever. Even if she's a true narcissist (or even moreso if she has a personality disorder) you have to develop more mental fortitude for the inevitable shitstorms she's going to throw.
/r/askMRP28/08/24 09:49 PM
1

My wife was hornier than every during pregnancy, but a lot of women feel like shit.
/r/askMRP28/08/24 09:31 PM
1

I'm currently monogamous, but when I was dating a few women I was super selective about who met my kids. I didn't want them to get attached to someone who wouldn't be around long, and I also didn't want to complicate otherwise easy casual relationships. I would do my best to only have one 'girlfriend' that your kid knows about.
/r/askMRP20/08/24 09:11 PM
1

If she's freezing up she probably has a lot of anxiety that's maybe related to your history, or her history before you. Sounds like it's not an attraction thing, but something she doesn't want to talk about.
/r/askMRP02/05/24 07:47 PM
–

Here's some of my facts: My ex and I are both highly educated professionals. She has more training and could earn $1MM/year, but chooses not to. The last two years of marriage she quit working. She did pilates, and laser hair removal, etc. I didn't like it, but what was I going to do? Whip her back to the office? At the time I was like, "fine, I make enough. Since you're my wife and I love you, rest and recuperate and then go back to work when you want." But instead she was hooking up with her f…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 01:53 AM
2

Sounds like you should take the lower-paying job that you can get. A judge may still hold you to the old income, but if you've made a good-faith effort to find a higher-paying job, and can only land a lower-paying gig, you make that argument in mediation (or court if it goes to that). Then potential alimony liabilities will be lower. It doesn't make a lot of sense to be unemployed, especially if your wife has the career aspirations of a hamster. It'll just drive the two of you further into debt …
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 12:48 AM
–

Changing venues is key. I try to get them away from crowds so we can have a little privacy and she can feel more comfortable. A random wall works well because a lot of women like being pressed up lightly against a wall. Just remember that most women are as horny as men, but they need to feel safe, comfortable, and not feel like a slut. If at any time you get the vibe that the woman is scared or anxious, slow down or abort. Ask them how they're feeling and see if you can put them at ease.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/23 04:28 PM
1

I think we all agree if the man is an abusive alcoholic, nobody should stick around in that relationship. I have a problem with women walking away because a man refuses to get therapy, or she isn't fulfilled, or whatever. It's usually worse for the kids if a woman leaves a relationship that doesn't involve a lot of conflict. Plus, she's usually poorer, coparenting is a mess, blended families are a crapshoot, kids have fewer resources....I think those situations are bad for everyone involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 04:10 PM
1

Whatever the circumstances were during the marriage, it's usually the woman's decision to end the marriage. Maybe that choice will be better for the children, but they usually suffer as a consequence.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 03:54 PM
1

I was having this conversation with my buddy last night, about my 'conversion rate' with sex, which he said was really high. He noticed that if I have start seeing a woman, and I want sex, it'll happen between dates 2-3. Here's a few of my tips, which I think are just common sense: Be genuinely interested in the stories they tell. Make appropriate eye contact, smile, and talk half as much as they talk. This is good advice for life. Light touch (escalation) is fine for gauging their interest, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 03:28 PM
1

People will try to justify their actions however they can. The outcomes are what should matter. Unfortunately the fallout from a woman's decision often impacts children the most.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 03:06 PM
11

It’s great you have more peace in your life, but make sure you don’t jump into a similar situation with the next relationship. You’re the captain
/r/askMRP06/05/22 12:37 PM
4

I can relate to what you’re feeling. It’s totally normal. Wives like yours want to know you’re loyal, and you are, but will still give you shit because that’s how she deals with her anxiety and fear of losing you. The biggest thing for me is outcome independence. Treat her like a valued first mate. Improve yourself. And if she’s still angry, that’s her problem.
/r/askMRP18/12/21 03:33 PM
1

If she’s still living with you she respects you. I’d start from there.
/r/askMRP16/07/21 06:37 AM
1

Go out and find that woman and deeply connect with her.
/r/askMRP16/07/21 06:36 AM
1

Fast way to divorce my man. A stronger man uses the techniques in WISNIFG
/r/askMRP16/07/21 06:34 AM
2

Learn active listening. It’s great you have a good body and nice career. That’s the bare minimum. She would have left you otherwise. Let go of your ego, realize you’ll be ok in the end, and let her talk
/r/askMRP16/07/21 06:33 AM
11

Take all of it with a grain of salt. Use what works for you, discard the rest
/r/askMRP16/07/21 06:30 AM
2

Have a discussion with your wife and figure out how to share the load of a house and little kids. You're probably more likely to have an outcome that benefits both of you. And then be present in your daily interactions
/r/askMRP08/07/21 09:03 PM
5

My experience is that when women are being manipulative, it's an immature form of getting their needs met. It sounds like you generally like your wife, that you want to be married, and that you want an intact family. I've had a lot of success in going out of my comfort zone and providing more comfort. You've improved your body, developed interesting hobbies, and have a social life. This is where I diverge from BPP and his levels of dread. Sure, learn some game and practice on your wife. But if y…
/r/askMRP26/02/18 08:33 PM
1

I've experienced that too. Give it time, it'll pass
/r/askMRP06/02/18 05:00 PM
7

You don't feel guilty because you haven't experienced any consequences. If your wife ever finds out and cries herself to sleep, you'll feel guilty for making her sad. Not that it's wrong to cheat, just that you have to be prepared for the consequences
/r/askMRP09/01/18 08:28 PM
3

Women are the mirror of the man
/r/askMRP04/01/18 03:52 PM
3

You're super fucked while making changes. She's going to shit-test you through hell and back. And you don't have the emotional coping skills to deal with it yet so expect it to get worse before it gets better. Sounds like your issue isn't having enough sex, it's setting and enforcing boundaries and a general anxiety around the relationship. Focus less on dread and focus more on making yourself a better man. Don't let your emotions rule you. Do lift heavy. Be a present dad. Improve your career. F…
/r/askMRP04/01/18 03:51 PM
2

With life, work, kids, gym, etc, I'm getting to the point where I don't want to fuck everyday. I like quality over quantity. So to answer your question: there's no right answer. I like your experiment-- see if you can let the sexual tension build up, but be aware that her horniness likely has nothing to do with her. You can plant seeds, make yourself attractive, kino, etc, but be prepared for it to not work. I usually take the policy of never turning down sex and I let kinky sex naturally happen…
/r/askMRP04/01/18 03:45 PM
1

I really enjoyed this OYS, especially with the focus on what you really want out of life. I think a lot of us want emotional intimacy with a woman, and it's hard to do that if we're spending time gaming other women. I was letting my career and family life degrade (even though I thought I wasn't). For me, I had to get rid of my smartphone so I could focus on what was really important.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/01/18 09:48 PM
1

You're playing games with a teenager
/r/askMRP02/01/18 10:14 PM
1

It's good to own your feelings, acknowledge them, and not let them control you. Men have a hamster, too, and if you don't let him out of his cage once in a while he'll cause trouble. If you can't trust your lady with your feelings, maybe she's not right for you.
/r/askMRP02/01/18 09:57 PM
2

Read way of the superior man. Lift weights and bulk like your life depended on it, because it does. Be emotionally supportive. Appraise your actions and make sure that you aren't being passive aggressive
/r/askMRP28/12/17 04:28 PM
2

I love it when other physicians show up here, thinking that just because we've achieved financial success and the respect and admiration of our peers, our wives will love and admire us. You're a smart guy. Start spending more than a half hour with her and you'll probably lose the rage.
/r/askMRP26/12/17 04:14 PM
2

Fogging and broken record. Have you read When I Say No I Feel Guilty? Honestly, what you're describing is just two younger people who are dating and not being assertive toward each other, which is like 99% of the population because very few families engage is assertive behavior. Take time to be aware of how you're acting. Don't let her tears get the best of you. Don't ignore it, but also don't beat yourself up over it. Let her have her emotions. Give it a few months of being cognizant of your in…
/r/askMRP19/06/17 06:56 PM
2

IUD doesn't stand for Initiate UR Divorce. There's obviously a lot of other shit going on, so try not to blame the marital problems on birth control. It'll help to be critical about yourself and check your ego at the door, Mr Fancy Suits. Otherwise, nice progress
/r/MarriedRedPill19/06/17 02:20 PM
5

This isn't about the period. When she says she's not happy anymore, it's either clinical depression or she's just plain tired of your shit. You've been describing a woman that is about ready to check out of the marriage. Make sure you're not contributing to her unhaaaapiness. Otherwise, she needs to figure it out for herself
/r/askMRP19/06/17 01:16 PM
1

If she's good to you and you're generally happy, why rock the boat. You get over oneitis when she's a cunt, and you realize there's better options out there. There's something to be said for treating your lady well when she's been good to you
/r/askMRP19/06/17 03:34 AM
–

I never really had oneitis. But fucking other women helped me appreciate my wife more.
/r/askMRP19/06/17 03:13 AM
1

How long have you been married? And was she ever sexy? It could be that over the years she's just gotten bored with marriage sex. Months of owning your shit may help out. There's no quick fix. Also, be prepared for the possibility that she doesn't ever come around.
/r/askMRP17/06/17 07:43 PM
2

I've been around for a while. Changed names to avoid doxxing. I'll write up a book report since there's some scientific basis behind it.
/r/askMRP16/06/17 10:42 PM
2

In this case, you've improved physically, professionally, and have your life on lock down. Maybe it's time to look at some of those blue-pill relationship bonding books. You've got nothing to lose, because it's not like you can kill attraction when it's not there. I like this one-- https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0609805797 It's pretty good-- it can help you figure out some of the bad patterns you do that make your wife not emotionally connected to you
/r/askMRP16/06/17 07:45 PM
7

Mate guarding isn't attractive. But setting healthy boundaries is. I climb. I think if she routinely goes on climbing trips with dudes while you're not there, it's just setting the relationship up for misery.
/r/askMRP16/06/17 06:38 PM
1

I like how the bloopers are splooshing their spanx over this post. Nice job man. Way to bring yourself out of her frame and celebrate her femininity.
/r/askMRP16/06/17 03:12 AM
2

My lady can get worse than an FBI interrogator. Fighting back used to be followed by an emotional abuse accusation. Fogging and negative assertion help me to agree with 'any possible truth' in theory. She calms down, thinks i'm taking an interest in her. Is it the most alpha thing ever? Probably not. But we have a good sex life and using this method our relationship is a lot more stable. STFU, change your name, bang your sister-in-law and move to Brazil didn't really work for me
/r/askMRP15/06/17 09:47 PM
8

Make sure you're presentable-- don't have to be the flashiest guy around, but dress well for wherever you are. Smile, and talk with EVERYONE. It doesn't even matter what you say. Talk about the weather, they're clothes. If she's an old lady in her wheelchair, ask her what model it is and say "Gee, it looks real nice. How fast will that thing go with the wind at your back?" Just stupid stuff like that. Or ask the kid bagging groceries what his plans are for the summer. That way, when you actually…
/r/askMRP15/06/17 07:16 PM
1

Make sure you're not using the gym/exercise as a cover-up for dealing with your problems. I was an ultra runner. I literally ran from my problems every day. So I was fit, but my life sucked. You can do that with lifting too. Find close male friends that you can talk with. Spend time with them. They'll be your greatest outlet for when she's a bitch, or you're just having a rough day. It would be nice to be able to rely on your wife, but that's not the way it works for 99% of men
/r/askMRP15/06/17 07:07 PM
5

Sit there, listen for a bit. Practice fogging with her. And if she has a valid complaint about something you fucked up, own it and do better next time. If she's a bitch, STFU and walk away for a bit.
/r/askMRP15/06/17 03:38 PM
1

Did you let her know you were coming home early and wanted to take the kids? Kind of sounds like she hates having surprises sprung on her. You travel a couple nights a week, then bounce in unannounced when you're home to take the kids. Her reaction may signal that you aren't respecting her time. She's shitty but make sure you're not being oblivious to how you're acting with her
/r/askMRP15/06/17 03:27 PM
–

I've been in a similar situation close to yours, it's what led me to MRP. Maybe not as severe, but the wife left with the kid and I faced the proposition of co-parenting with an angry ex wife. Here's the thing-- you can't walk on eggshells. Nobody wins in that situation. There's still another adult in the equation. Assume the relationship is lost. She filed for divorce and you really have nothing to lose. Treat her like your main plate. The fact that she's ghosting you is a bad sign for a future…
/r/askMRP15/06/17 02:56 PM
5

Occasional, controlled burns are needed to clear the brush. STFU and leave just kicks the can down the road, if it's a real issue. Sometimes we have to remember that not everything is a shit test. Some things need to be changed in the relationship. Gotta make sure that you're not ignoring valid complaints
/r/askMRP15/06/17 02:41 PM
7

There's a difference between being an emotional tampon, a punching bag, STFU, and being an oak. Will 88's advice may work for him, but I doubt it will contribute to a loving and harmonious marriage. You've already identified the times when you reflexively get sucked into your wife's drama and you want to change that. STFU doesn't mean that you sit there with a smirk on your face, practicing "amused mastery." AM works well when you're seducing your wife, but it's a shit strategy when there's real…
/r/askMRP15/06/17 02:35 PM
1

Atrocity or assertiveness. I guess it's in the eye of the beholder. Maybe the husband is over correcting for years of being passive. Maybe he's being mean. Hopefully OP and her husband use this opportunity to discuss their problems and work on them together instead of blaming the other person.
/r/ExRedPill14/06/17 08:52 PM
1

At least the dudes here are telling him to own his shit. All those shitheads where she posted are telling her she's an innocent victim of abuse
/r/askMRP14/06/17 04:23 PM
1

'It got worst'
/r/askMRP14/06/17 04:20 PM
3

My opinion is the car doesn't matter that much. Sure, a flashier car will turn heads, but the driver is more important. I'd get something that you want and enjoy. You'll be more comfortable and it will show when you're driving that new tail around town. I have a nice truck, but I spend most the summer driving a moped because, fuck it, it's fun.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/06/17 04:09 PM
-1

I've been in a similar situation to your husband. Cheating, blaming my problems on my wife. It's only when we take responsibility for our lives that we can overcome them. That goes for both partners in the relationship, because we're always looking for something to blame. In this case, it seems you're blaming red pill for larger problems in your marriage. He's blaming you for his insecurities
/r/ExRedPill14/06/17 03:34 PM
1

Some anger from the wife is expected-- you're changing the dynamics. But constant anger is a red flag that you might be going Rambo. You can do what you want, but literally treating her like a child and texting (ie free validation) randos is just going to blow it up for you.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/17 07:29 PM
1

The balls of these women. They think they're so perfect and men want to make changes out of the blue. It's the equivalent of obese shitheads trying to get threesomes and anal from their wives
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/17 06:59 PM
–

IDK why wigglycharlie has it out for you and BPP. Probably takes her mind off her obesity, dusty vagina and polycystic ovaries
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/17 06:55 PM
5

She got a trust fund you're looking to tap into? Because that's the only tapping you'll be doing if you stay with her
/r/askMRP13/06/17 01:43 AM
1

I scrolled your history and saw your progress pics. Nice work, even with the juice! I get hit on a lot at work too. (She gets legit propositioned because some dudes are aggressive). When you go out, just talk with lots of people. If there's girls in the group, eventually one of them will start checking you out. Your wife will notice. You don't have to be overt with it. Again, just chat people up and IOI's will happen.
/r/askMRP12/06/17 10:19 PM
–

There's one school of thought that your frame should be your pure essence. You act as you want to act; cool, calm, collected and unshakeable. You should not change what you're doing just to placate a shitty, emotional harpy. This is the inflexible frame, and it works for some. The superior frame is still your pure essence, yet you don't mind playing the relationship game. After all, you married the lady and she should be providing some value to you. So you give her your best qualities. When she …
/r/askMRP12/06/17 10:09 PM
1

You work from home? Start working at an office with real people. It's the easiest way to start being social. Make sure you talk to everyone you see.
/r/askMRP12/06/17 07:37 PM
1

It doesn't matter that she knows about MRP because you shouldn't be reactive to what she does. Your frame is your reality. And your reality should be "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggonit people wanna have sex with me". So sit and listen to her and try to understand where she's coming from. Don't STFU all night and be a deaf mute-- nobody likes being around that guy. She doesn't know why she's shitty and neither will you. All she cares about is that you at least made and attempt to be…
/r/askMRP12/06/17 07:29 PM
1

I agree with the breakdown, except for the cancelling dinner and legal matter. In terms of dinner, yeah, you could cancel and not reward bad behavior, but it comes off as butthurt too often unless the man has an iron frame and has been consistently enforcing boundaries. He's being reactive in response to his wife's shittiness. I'd let her know that her behavior was inappropriate, but stick to my plans because I don't let shitty women change my plans. And the legal matter-- I'm all for men being …
/r/askMRP12/06/17 04:19 PM
–

I don't particularly like dread as a tool to create a harmonious relationship. Will it result in her sucking your dick? Possibly, if she dreads the possibility of losing you or your resources. In my experience, it created a situation where I didn't care to think of her as a fun human being who I wanted to share my life with. So I've had a lot more success by doing the opposite-- giving her more of my time and attention despite a generally shitty attitude on her part. Kind of like investing in a …
/r/askMRP12/06/17 04:11 PM
2

One thing that hurt me was taking my wife's progress for granted and treating her like she's not doing enough. So she'd be nice, pleasant, sexy etc and I'd think "Well, she's not offering threesomes and packing sandwiches daily." So I'd get butthurt and bitchy. So make sure you're mindful of the improvements that your lady is making. You know what she enjoys, so take time and effort into giving her gifts of time and attention. For example, I hate beach vacations but the wife loves them. Lately, …
/r/askMRP12/06/17 03:59 PM
7

Idk how she said it or what was going on. The way you phrased it sounded like she was being playful and teasing you. Unless she said "oh 8 gig. You sure it's not just 4 like your little Asian dick?"
/r/MarriedRedPill08/06/17 02:54 PM
6

If your frame is "Bobby Knight" and that's how your relationship works, then you'd want to shut down the disprespect right away. If I was on an island I'd say "8 giggity" with a shit eating grin. I don't have the patience to be a hard ass all the time.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/06/17 01:13 PM
1

Why is she on a beta blocker so young? And I agree, if she's got heart disease and a newborn, lesbian sex should be the least of her worries right now. Something doesn't add up
/r/askMRP08/06/17 01:04 PM
1

Metoprolol because you tell new guys to slow down? I'd go for Zofran to stop all the puking
/r/askMRP08/06/17 01:00 PM
3

I'm sure you're frustrated because your wife won't touch your dick, so you need to make a decision. Either change what you're doing or leave her. My guess is that you're doing some sort of mute Rambo husband game where you don't flirt, kino, and bring then fun. Then, when she acts like a bitch (as all women do from time to time) you withdraw your time and attention. You don't actively try to lean into your wife's stupid emotions and then she feels distant to you. She's probably sitting there, wo…
/r/askMRP07/06/17 10:04 PM
3

So you guys are all essentially at an SMV less than 3. Horny fat chicks, skinny nerds, the whole thing is like band camp and your wife is going to take the kids flute up her cooch. I know everyone has their hobbies and I'm a pretty big nerd too, but really? LARPIng? usually when you have depression keeping to your hobbies is a good idea, but in your case giving up Larp was the right choice
/r/askMRP07/06/17 03:45 PM
2

I'm in the camp that if she adds value--a lot of value-- I don't waste my valuable time worrying about her whereabouts. If I'm ready to drop her for other reasons I might try to get proof of infidelity for custody purposes. Otherwise, I've got too much going on
/r/askMRP07/06/17 03:34 PM
5

The most disturbing thing is how she stalked the dude at his house while you sat at home with your dick in your hand. Open marriages don't work if the wife is obsessed with another guy and forgets about you. They're supposed to be ways in which very emotionally mature people can explore their needs. More often than not, it turns into a cuck fest. My wife and I have had our share of extramarital shenanigans, but we put a stop to it because it doesn't lead to a happy mutually beneficial family
/r/MarriedRedPill07/06/17 12:56 PM
–

I'll take a different approach-- if the orbiter is super fat, ugly, etc, and lives with his mom and your wife is higher SMV I say let her have her little sleepover. What's the worst that happens? She fucks him and you confirm that you're married to a whore that makes very poor decisions? You should spend the time alone at the gym and improving yourself. Once you're a man who can command respect you can give ultimatums. Otherwise, it's just a weak power move. Also, what kind of gay ass hobbies ar…
/r/askMRP07/06/17 12:49 PM
1

I'm glad you posted this. It's important that we realize that we all have occasional fuckups. It's ok, spilling you're feelings once in a while is healthy. And it's good to have a partner who has your back. Do you really want to marry someone who doesn't give a shit about your feelings? Strong alpha leaders are beset by the same emotions as everyone else. The key is to realize it, accept it, and stick to your mission. When you have a mission, you might get worried from time to time. But soon you…
/r/askMRP06/06/17 01:30 PM
–

You've started doing the right thing and you're identifying some of the behaviors that are unproductive to a harmonious relationship. The biggest thing I see though, is that you are so focused on being right that you lose sight of everything else. Learn this-- of course you're right! Also, nobody gives a fuck. Who are you trying to impress? Not your wife, she knows you're right but she doesn't care. She's more committed than you are to winning this retard olympics of a marriage you've created. S…
/r/askMRP06/06/17 03:34 AM
2

As with anything, you have to figure out what your must haves are in a woman. One of mine was physical fitness. I didn't compromise on that, but I compromised on other things (like not being a bitch one week out of the month). So if it's that important to you that she doesn't go to parties or wants to binge on netflix, i'd bounce. Assume that your woman will never change.
/r/askMRP05/06/17 11:13 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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