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rediscover03 Archive

View 13 posts and 304 comments by rediscover03 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

How are you in the fantasy front? Do you have things you wish you'd do and dream about? Why don't you tell her exactly what you want, talk dirty to her get her to become your little sex toy 100% destined to please you - basically use your imagination and the reality of the submissive woman that she is.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/15 12:46 AM
1

I like a simple rule of thumb I started adopting ~1 yr ago: never argue with a woman.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 11:50 AM
1

Ok thanks - similar here. I am very thoughtful and deliberate about my interactions with her, civil, then let her come to me if she wants to hang out and be sweet. Otherwise I am minding my own business. It's rough because mine is a real harpie and I've gotten used to her being center of attraction and me orbiting ... Old habits die hard but they die and it's actually fun to practice slowly regaining control.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 01:31 AM
2

I like this and am implementing something similar. Question: how do you deal with kids at dinner time? I mean everyone sort of has dinner together and I want to use dinner as oppty to talk to my kids and hang out. I can't go in another room by myself nor can I exclude my wife from eating with me and kids.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/15 09:30 PM
1

Good questions. Got me thinking and reevaluate my post and enthusiasm. This is a long journey.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/15 03:29 PM
2

I'll chime in. I agree with some of your push back below, OP, it's captain's job to work to get results and this means often knowing who you're dealing with and what mood she may be in. But at same time commenters are right too: you can't be over the top monitoring her shit since you'll end up micromanaging her and get big time distracted from what maters: you and your life goals. What if you notice she hasn't had food, or water? Maybe she just doesn't feel like it for whatever fucking reason sh…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/15 02:43 PM
1

Fair enough. Your equivalent of a kick in the nuts has made me reevaluate my MAP and certain self limiting beliefs.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/15 04:01 PM
0

You assume one takes the red pill pre baby. In that case, sure your scenario is workable and keep the dominant pressure on. I agree with that. But if you unplug from blue pill land and have the wake up call of your life as she goes into 2nd trimester the situation is very different.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/15 01:27 PM
1

It depends on where you start from and where you are in your unplugging journey. My wife hasn't gone down on me in +9 months and if I all of a sudden act a lot more assertive and demanding, escalate dread, I come off as a butt hurt little boy. After 6+ yrs of marriage I can't escalate to ultimatums or anything of that sort right as she's about to deliver. That shit takes time. It will be a failed comfort test and there will be too little time for my changes to have desired impact. As they say, a…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/15 01:23 PM
2

Well for one she's not ovulating so that's a change right there. No scheduled horniness. So some things do change. And how do you up the dread as she's about to give birth? How do you go to level 7+ when she's about to go to delivery room? It's just shooting yourself in foot IMO. See my detailed post from earlier today - curious in your thoughts.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/15 01:37 AM
3

Awesome. Welcome. One man at a time. Glad you could join us.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 08:25 PM
2

No. Don't apologize. Play it cool, show you've moved on and it hasn't even registered with you. You have more important things to do and be concerned about than a petty fight. If and when you indeed believe you've done something wrong (not here doesn't seem), then you can say something like "I shouldn't have said /done that." That's it. At the very most.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 06:41 PM
0

Well you do but you should do it very carefully and without major moves to amplify it . Have to be very subtle and add plenty of comfort. It is tough because realistically you wouldn't leave her or start plating her when she's about to deliver a - your - baby. So from that standpoint, I'd say you don't dread her: it's because you can't go all the way. Edit- this was meant as a reply to /u/TRP_Metamorphosis below.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 05:58 PM
1

2 kids here and wife 8 mo pregnant. It's been tough since I unplugged 3 mo ago. Rocky, talks of couples therapy, used every trick in book (AWALT). Overall add some beta (mindfully and not knee jerk responses), like give her some foot massages and be more attentive to shit she can't do on her own when big. Also I made my way into the shower right after her many times and had her use her hands on me, since normal sex has been very uncomfortable for her - lots of excuses there and reasons to put it…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 05:00 PM
1

This is a big deal. An attitude of "you don't next your wife" is severely self limiting. From own experience, once I opened my mind to life after divorce and no longer entertained fairly take notion of life together forever, met with attorney etc and seriously have a mental plan in case I decide to eject, it's amazing how much more confident I became in my marriage and overall as a man. So yeah, you're going to give it more time and work if you unplug while already married, but ultimately one mu…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 04:53 PM
1

Doesn't sound like you read the sidebar material. Strongly advise you take a step back here and do your homework. You will have plenty of aha moments.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 04:44 PM
2

Yeah I know what you mean and that's he default answer, esp. if you have kids and there's more at stake. But in this case based on OP's account and clear lack of enthusiasm for this woman, I'd say get another one that's more into him and more mom material - if op wants family.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/15 01:23 PM
20

You sound like a rational guy with not a lot of interest in your woman. Next.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/15 08:36 PM
3

Promote thought and challenging established wisdom through questions. Teach kids to appreciate and understand differences in human beings, including fundamental male and female traits. Learn from nature. Emphasize science. As little dogma as possible. Realism. Just some ideas. Definitely I'd encourage kids to ask questions constantly and to find their own voices and truth through their own discovery.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/15 02:12 PM
2

I'd say start slowly trying shit out. See how you feel afterwards. If you start sensing you're losing frame and become more beta submissive, then you'll know it's not right for you. But if it doesn't affect that and may even enhance your frame overall, by her following your instructions on how to please you, then keep at it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/15 02:05 PM
1

She only gets alimony for sure until divorce is finalized. After that it depends on how many years they've been married and a host of other factors, like her individual earning power.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 12:44 PM
3

Channel that anger into some planning effort. Don't deal with one day at a time as it comes, but plan for example next weekend or in a couple of weeks or whatever to go hiking or fishing or some activity you enjoy, clear your mind, get your car squeaky clean, do something on your own. Plan it as opposed to decide on the fly, because otherwise you seem like a butthurt little boy.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 12:42 PM
5

It will take time for you to get over the deer in the headlights symptoms you're exhibiting now when your wife "puts you on the spot" and calls you out on your behavior changes. So don't give up and don't sweat it. In the beginning you'll be very self conscious. So keep reminding yourself you're the one with the penis, you're in it for the log haul, a lot of what she does is just talk ( talk is cheap as we know), and keep thinking "what would James Bond do?" to get yourself in an amused, in-cont…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 01:17 AM
1

This is very well said. It's like OI. The outcome doesn't matter as much one shot at a time, it's the process and the battle and doing that right that matters. Seeing relapse as part of that long term transformation and getting back on horse.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/15 08:22 PM
2

Yeah same here. Praxeology.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/15 07:27 PM
1

Can't answer but I can tell you that when I took RP I was reminded of amazing tale from Nietsche which I remember I read 15 yrs ago. I'll post separately - it's amazing how true and red pill some of classic philosophers can be.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/15 04:27 PM
5

Pure gold. Well done. Mods: Suggest creating a wiki section with Success Stories like this one, and saving these great stories there. Every few weeks or so, we get one of these that is so inspirational and powerful- worth getting back to every now and then. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/15 03:16 PM
2

It's all relative. What you need to do is read and research other people (bios, blogs etc) and see how men have bounced back from much tougher situations before. It will help you realize your delusion is a tempest in a teapot relative to others' life issues and it will give you some tools and techniques on how to look at the world now that you've learned some things were not what you thought they were.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/15 11:43 AM
2

What a great post. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/15 02:54 AM
1

Nah, don't abstain unless you're doing an experiment on yourself that's part of your self improvement plan. Otherwise, go to the well for water and be the alpha male any time you feel like it and your woman is healthy enough and in your orbit. That's why she's your woman and wife right? Go be a man, big guy. Enjoy.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 09:59 PM
1

Yeah I think you have Oneitis and you are hooked on this girl. Not saying it's bad, but objectively that's what it is. I'd focus on becoming the man you want to be, cool it a bit and then if the two of you do hook up again in the future you'll be amazed how much more awesome it will be because she'll fall for you being a much better man. And you'll have the balls and brains to enjoy it and not blow it like you did before. But first: work on yourself and who cares if you get her back. There are t…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 09:25 PM
1

In my case I did it because I don't like debt, and wanted to extinguish it from household, yes. But that's financially dumb because it relied on BP assumption and fairy tale dream that we'd be married forever. Why use marital assets/ income (in which I have 50%) to pay off something that's 100% hers? It's dumb and if we do get to D day I have to build a case (according to my preliminary attorney convos) that I used joint money to pay off her debt. If I hadn't paid off any principal, I wouldn't h…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 08:26 PM
1

Technically no. If we divorce, she keeps loan balance at that future time as fully hers. But I have been quietly and diligently making the payments every month like a good hubby (she's a sahm) and even used some of my bonus money in the past to pay part of it off. I know, face palm. The hard lessons we learn and the ugliness of blue pill man's stupidity exposed right here.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 08:12 PM
4

Dude - this is fucking great work. Stick with it. When I unplugged (3 mo ago) it hit me like a ton of bricks and I have been much more attentive now in social gatherings where I hang out and what conversations I am in and I am not in. Amazing to see other dads flock to their wives at kids' school parties, for example and just wait it out or get in their wives' conversations. At this one I did opposite, found a dad I wanted to talk to, sat down at same table and started chatting away and shooting…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 06:12 PM
3

I am with you bro. I found out about massive student debt after +1 yrs of dating and a few months before wedding.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 06:00 PM
8

I think throwing an opinion around is actually good, even if you're still unplugging/ in early stage. This is how you test your learning and whether you've internalized RP newfound truths. Anyway at least that's how I learn: be vocal, embarrass myself at times (see my initial posts) and gradually practice to see if indeed I can give advice and personal perspective here and there, esp to very green newcomers. Be sure mods and serious RP men around here have a high bar and will not tolerate BS and…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/15 05:57 PM
1

See my long answer. I'd argue we're only responsible for those feelings insofar as they lead to an outcome that is not congruent with our mission and goals.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 09:44 PM
2

The long answer is that a feeling of safety is very often highly subjective. It will often be based on the captain's judgment and what he deems safe for his ship and its crew/passengers. There are times when some of the crew/passengers are simply erratic or emotional or just don't get it. While not being responsible for the feelings themselves and not having a duty to fix them, the captain still overall holds responsibility for the safety of crew and the outcome of a given journey or experience.…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 08:11 PM
3

As a man yes you are responsible for the safety of your crew, first officer included.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 08:03 PM
1

Doubt it. Safety is big deal and if she ain't feeling like you're the leader at that point, no amount of acceleration and A&A would have made it better. It's like going all caveman and dirty talk on her when she's not turned on or in the mood. It backfires and you may sound creepy. But when she's hot and ready, yes - you can dominate and take all kinds of risks - sex on the beach, sex on an flying airplane, trashy dirty talk etc.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 04:17 PM
2

In case you haven't seen this: here's some perspective from a /r/deadbedrooms post on kids in an unhappy marriage. http://www.reddit.com/r/DeadBedrooms/comments/369fo2/to_all_the_parents_in_a_db/
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 01:23 PM
9

And as far as driving remember the woman's first prerequisite to get turned on is to feel safe. If she's not in the mood for thrills in passenger seat, then likely any extra weight on gas pedal from you is going to turn her off even more as she feels need to say "slow down" as hamster gets fucking fearful. So what's fun for you and a bit of a release behind the wheel can be a negative for your odds of generating tingles.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 02:16 AM
1

Hmmm as others picked up as well, it seems there was something going on before the drive and the phone. Somehow you weren't a happy camper when dinner ended. "Put the phone away" can be a bit too controlling and if she's like my wife she can be turned off by it since it can sound like I am butthurt. Could you have used that time to hit the restroom? Step back, make a joke about it and be less direct? To be clear it sucks and i hate when my wife uses the ipione when we're together, I am just sayi…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 02:13 AM
3

Wow man, don't have advice for you other than saying I am I similar situation but 9-10 months behind. Started unplugging 3 mo ago, about to have 3rd kid and we're talking moving in bigger house. Thinking long term I do not want to grow old with my wife... especially if history is any guide and she does not change materially for the better and sweeter and sexier. So once new baby is out and I will slowly up the dread, apply all I am learning I may very well come to similar point next spring. One …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/05/15 06:05 PM
1

Fuckin a. So true.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/05/15 06:47 PM
1

With a track record like that and what you've been through as a result of her actions, you should probably keep a much tighter leash on her. You should not tolerate any kind of DUI type activity and remove driving privileges and car keys ASAP. Good luck, get professional help.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/05/15 06:46 PM
2

walking away, going to do something else than engage in hamster talk not letting her interrupt me. Say whatever I am about to assertively and ignoring her attempt to talk over me. When done and she is full on hamster BS I realize what's going on and look for ways to remove myself from convo/ end convo. applying plenty fogging and negative inquiry - that's very helpful in not going along for the hamster powered ride of negativity/ criticism look for ways to be dominant be it with body language or…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/05/15 02:57 PM
1

What system are you using? I implemented cash-only and envelopes system a couple of yrs ago and it worked for a few months and my wife changed behavior: she was tracking her own expenses diligently. But then the issue of gas came up and the convenience (&habit...) of using credit cards. So before too long we were back to credit cards which as we know makes it a lot easier to spend and harder to know in real time how much you have left in budget. Plus we like to travel and accumulate airline mile…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 07:24 PM
1

Sounds like you made up your mind and you know in your gut and brain that you do not want a third. It also sounds like the past promise may hinder your ability to enforce your newfound determination and decision. It's all about how you look at that promise and if you indeed think YOU are breaking something of value - that may weaken your case even before you bring it to your wife. The more important promise you made to your wife (and to yourself) is that you would be a responsible, loving, suppo…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 11:27 AM
1

Not sure what to make of your post. I struggle to see value for others in it or any insight and constructive self reflection. Why do you hate women?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 01:12 AM
2

"We all know here that as men the best way to have a fulfilling life is as a married man with family. " It depends. That's your judgment call. Let each man define for himself what a fulfilling life is and let him pursue it as long as it does not interfere with other people's rights or break the law.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 09:03 PM
1

Awesome- can't wait for baby to be delivered so I can start using this.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 01:00 AM
4

Nah. Ask here, man. To her you just deliver.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 12:58 AM
5

Didn't. Won't. Probably for at least another six months to a year. Will not do any good, it will raise all kinds of unnecessary questions and doubts. It's like inviting your guests in your kitchen two hours before the meal is served so they can see all the ingredients on the table and you frantically working on it to put a nice dinner together. Would they appreciate everything they see, a messy kitchen and chef focused on his work as opposed to entertaining and pleasant conversation?
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 10:21 PM
1

"Sweetheart, I'd love to help you, but I'm doing something else right now baby - why don't you go and get it, you know that area better anyway. Let me know if you're having trouble." IMHO the key is to be really sweet, playful and diplomatic with these, and this way she won't sense any frustration on your part. I call shit test. And BTW my wife is pregnant too and it's amazing the kind of shit she thinks she can get away with.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 08:04 PM
3

I'll share a resource that I used for several months until I discovered RP and this sub, with associated materials. Since then if feels like I outgrew it and that this is way better. It's a guy named Corey Wayne, he wrote a book and has thousands of 15-20 min coaching videos on YouTube. He covers a lot of common ground with RP, though not explicitly referring to RP (maybe because he often refers to his book instead and wants to sell that). EDIT: Also, there's a little book called The Alpha Male …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 06:38 PM
6

Nice post. Appreciate the cold, hard truths - and detached style. Reads like a rational alpha wrote it. Good example man, thanks for leading the discussion.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 06:33 PM
2

Great post ! And in line with how I was thinking about it and having a timeframe in mind. Much more refined and good ideas as far as resetting clock. One flavor I'd add is that you can only go through reset process so many times, and also as you age, amount of time should reduce slightly as you don't have that much time to give someone who doesn't live up to what you want when your own life and ability to enjoy it decreases with natural passage of time& less time left to live. I will likely have…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 01:12 PM
3

Thanks - and thanks to /u/MRP9 and /u/alpha_n3rd , I just bought some protein shakes at Target and will start downing these before workouts. I guess I am officially a body builder now.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:13 PM
1

I like "unplugging". Good one. Love the martial arts parallels- even if you're Morihei Uyeshiba, Bruce Lee or Mayweather - there's always going to be someone better than you or someone / some situation that may catch you off guard. There's no such thing as tough. There's trained and untrained. So all we can do is train. My favorite martial arts legend / story is about some two sword masters that "fought" a duel for 10 min but without actually moving from their stance. All the battle was in their…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 02:46 PM
1

Yeah I don't mind using it (here goes) but as I do I am thinking "what, you advanced guys don't learn any more?" So maybe novice is a better label. Always learning...
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 10:49 AM
1

Went to gym last night instead of in the morning (normally I go early, before work). Ended up having a great, hard workout (at one point I miscalculated the weight on my squats and had 15% more weight that I wanted - I did my sets and felt great without even realizing till last minute). I get home, it's 8 pm and I almost pass out in my kitchen as I attempt to warm myself dinner (wife was putting kids to bed). As I search the internet for ideas trying to stay lucid and not faint, I find an articl…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 10:45 AM
1

And to have complete OI on the other hand and address your "irritable" comment, have your plan in place to take care of your own grooming if for some reason she doesn't do it. This way you're not "reliant" and you know you've taken care of yourself either way.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 03:43 PM
10

I think it sounds kind of cool. You're the king ape and she's fucking grooming you as you please. You get to correct her, enjoy the view of an attentive wife who cares after you and overall enjoy being pampered why not. You can tease her and do all sorts of other dominant things from that position.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 03:35 PM
1

I think the answer is buried in your post. You already noticed there's some covert requests and attempts at changing your behavior in there. So my approach: 1. Acknowledge feelings, bring tissues, be supportive as much as you can without altering your path and goals 2. If things are really bad (you rationally evaluate them to be so) then consider making changes so that ship doesn't fall apart because FO sick. 3. If she asks you (overt communication) and it's obvious she needs extra care or you t…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:46 PM
1

More posts like this and we'll have you go hang out with /u/LifeChoiceReflector Please follow advice guys have already given you on your post from earlier. Otherwise all this is minutia and building sandcastles in the face of your tsunami of past unhealthy learned attitudes and worldview.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:24 PM
1

With time and with practice. It's a slow road but it can be done. And your intellect, humility and self-awareness (seems you have all of them) are huge assets already for you. Now what's needed is the work and effort to slowly improve your life. Focus on that. Marriage is something that is supposed to work for you and for what you want in life, not some fairly tale everyone else seems to be living. -I have a journal where I track my emotionally charged interactions with my wife. Not every day, b…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:16 PM
2

The lawyer talk is a HUGE milestone and paradigm shift. I used to think "I will never get divorced, I will work on this, we are bound for life, divorce is terrible, life is going to be a failure, that's not me/ us etc." Until I opened my eyes and really started seeing that as a potential path. Then had a talk with two attorneys, just so I indeed rationally evaluate the divorce scenario. Amazing how much better my attitude and my marriage got as a result. I am no longer self limited, and this tra…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:00 PM
7

Good post- Definitely I started doing that with my kids and I can see some results. If anything it helps me maintain frame and be the rock. I acknowledge they're upset and even angry (say when I deny tv if toys are not put away) and hug them etc. While emphasizing through kind words importance of cleaning up. Right on re body language and communicating that way.- it's very important.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 12:53 PM
1

Great example with the ice cream. I'll use it/ apply it in my own worldview.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 11:52 AM
11

Love the attitude but save it for where you should use it which is on improving yourself. And you won't find sympathy for your excuses here at MRP so I'd cut that too.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 11:32 AM
4

You give way more than you should in this marriage and get very little in return. Your approaches only make things worse and you've noticed it as well. Start by reading No More Mr. Nice Guy by Robert Glover. You are a classic case based on what you describe and it will be interesting to see if you come to see the light and change your life around. Welcome.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 11:10 AM
1

Why don't you guys plan a trip somewhere. 2 weeks to get away from it all. And I'd definitely get off any psychiatric drugs. I think they do more harm than good.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 10:44 PM
1

Most if not all of your postings are in /r/deadbedrooms - have you internalized RP truths? Have you read our side bar material? Where are you on your MAP progress?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 10:41 PM
2

I'm at my in-laws for dinner. I had my kids do crafty gifts for my wife and she loved them. My mom-in law now asks my wife "what did you get for MD?" Wife goes "well I got those nice gifts from the kids I told you about". Mom-in law: "I got these beautiful flowers from dad (i.e. My wife's dad). My wife goes "well I will have to get myself something". All this was said with me around, getting a drink, and with my wife obviously wanting to drop a hint. Fuck it- my wife is not my mom, I should not …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 07:18 PM
1

Sounds like you want a quick solution. Don't think we have one. Go read sidebar material and wiki and report back in 1 month with changes you've made to your life and questions you have at that point. Good luck.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 12:21 PM
1

It's a 2 hour interview he did with a guy, another blogger who advocates for men's rights and PUAs (I think) can't remember his name. Link came in newsletter, has to do with rollo's launching of his new book.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 01:05 AM
1

You have a greater chance to be the leader and for her to truly follow you, because of your life experience and wisdom. Women age a lot worse than men. So when you're 50 and beyond you'll want next to you someone with vitality and looks.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 12:58 AM
2

Also if you have to ask, and you're only 31, I'd say you're not really ready. And don't assume you're older than many folks here - by the way you write, it sounds like you think you've reached an age when "it's time". May be a false premise and a fear-based belief. I'd wait another 5 years, especially since it doesn't sound like you have an LTR that you want to turn exclusive. Listen to Rollo's podcast from a month or so ago, he goes in great detail how his marriage started and how it led from a…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 12:53 AM
1

I'd look for at least 6-7 years age difference (I.e. Get yourself a younger gal). Also make your checklist, vet her well and her family. Go with someone of Latin American, Asian or Eastern European decent - they're likely to be less bitchy and less of a feminist.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/15 12:37 AM
1

I helped kids make little crafty presents for her. As alpha_n3rd said - she's their mom, not mine.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/15 07:17 PM
1

Oh yeah - that's a classic. Enjoy rereading it every time. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/15 07:14 PM
1

Don't think about it all day. You have shit to do and to focus on. Of course you're going to initiate tonight. You're going to initiate whenever you feel like it. Maybe it will be tonight, tomorrow night, any night. In the meantime live your mission and fulfill what you want to accomplish as a man.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/15 05:57 PM
2

Well the problem is that 80-90% of men are betas and their women end up "caring more" because hubbies are drunk captains and do not mind their ship &household. I doubt there is something intrinsic about women that makes them "care more" about keeping place tidy. What's the underlying message (IMO) is that women want the man to step up and lead not just do a chore. Article is terrible in that it introduces carrot all men want (sex) and implies you're going to get it if you only start helping with…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/15 04:53 PM
1

Resist temptation to announce. It will come and come again. I started 3 mo ago now and have slowly started to let my new way of seeing world and relationships come in in conversations, indirectly (like last night when we went out with a couple of friends) PLUS through actions and results delivered. Never through direct convo with wife of the type "look honey, see what I am doing, I'm going to be better, look, love me" and similar nonsense. It's approval seeking behavior.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/15 02:59 PM
1

Holy shit what a story. Thanks for sharing - very applicable to my situation... Thanks again man.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/15 01:03 PM
1

Yes - financially. The decision to cut ties later has greater consequences the more you stay in this marriage, and the more time she is out of work and dependent on you. Of course, run this by your attorney. My point is that if you know deep down that you won't want to be with her 10 yrs from now, the sooner you eject, the better. And I know it many be cruel and tough, but IMO it's likely better if kids are used to from early age with two loving parents who live separately vs. two parents who ha…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/15 12:51 PM
2

Not to complicate things further for OP, but the more time passes the more power she gets (if divorce does happen much later down the line), so OP should be getting progressively more value and delivery of what he wants from wife, since he has more to lose by waiting/ staying - again if things hit the fan say 12 yrs from now and he hasn't acted until then on the Eject plan.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 08:34 PM
3

Good work, man. Good work. The not so good news is that work never stops and this journey doesn't have a specific goal line you have to reach. But you sound like you get it and you're ok with it.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 08:16 PM
1

Dude. Don't have another baby with this woman. Step back, look at everything, is it worth another 2+ yrs of no sex after she gets what she wants. Indeed sounds like you have yourself a master manipulator.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 11:32 AM
2

Similar here... Tried mint.com, apps on phone, pen and paper, excel - all kinds of things. Each month we're in the red. I think it's a leftover from being a child and not having money responsibilities, spending without knowing or caring how much is left. Now I am doing envelopes and fewer budgets / categories as I tell my wife "money has got to come from somewhere to pay bills" and "something has got to give". Just because there is a justification for an expense (of course she has one all the ti…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 10:22 AM
2

You need to take a solid look at what you mean with your first sentence. If you have lots of degrees and pat yourself on the back for being "highly educated" and yet fail miserably at life with shit like this, then you're not highly educated at all, buddy. Go back to school. Real life school.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/15 12:48 PM
7

Keep your head up, not down, while doing the MAP. Be ready to walk away. Mentally and physically (ie meet with an attorney and make a plan in case you need it). Your kids would want a stand up man as a dad, not a wussy.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/15 12:16 AM
1

Also see my post from a month ago (somewhat related) and some good comments and feedback from the guys here: http://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2y76r7/getting_a_slight_erection_when_i_act_assertive/
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 09:23 PM
1

Sounds like you're getting good results already. Also sounds like you're going through a tough period where going to extremes will not help. So I'd say find a balance: cut out the porn completely and if you need to release, do it once a week or whatever (and not with porn) - and gradually involve involve your wife in it - via normal sex or otherwise.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 09:10 PM
2

Ah man that sounds like a fun project! Nuke those suckers.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 05:10 PM
4

Had a neighbor and a buddy come help me move some furniture at my house Friday night. My one buddy is actually the husband of one of my wife's friends and we've done some joint family vacations together in the past. We move the stuff, neighbor leaves, buddy hangs a little longer , we have a beer and some snacks in my kitchen where my wife and also her mom who stopped by were hanging out. The dude is totally blue pill and gravitated toward my wife plus her mom nucleus and conversation. I should n…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 04:22 PM
1

I think you're still in the wrong frame if mind (frustrated, uncertain, unsatisfied, clingy) when you hamster around thinking "how can I get her to give me a BJ" and then think creatively of what kind of bargains you can enter into to get what you want. You have to step back, maybe do a bit of mediation, work out more, get your confidence back, think more "what would James Bond do?" - and then you'll see your approach will be better, natural and likely more successful. When you really want a BJ …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 01:48 PM
1

One way I am doing this is looking for ways to plan activities with kids that may or may not involve my wife. Normally she's the one setting calendar for kids activities, so what I started doing is look for things to do with kids that I can take leading role in setting up. Put them on calendar far ahead, or keep a list in case I make last minute decisions to take them somewhere. Another thing I plan to do is start some kid of dads' club at the girls school and again take an active, leading role …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 01:02 PM
2

Good point. Unless you're in mortal danger or have a plan on how a formal complaint fits in some attorney- informed strategic approach, you don't want to be the one calling cops.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 06:21 PM
1

This. Great point. "RPers are realists" worth reminding every day.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 02:41 PM
1

Shrug it off. She's trying to shame you. It's one of the many times she will. And stop being such a scared cat. You've only been married 1 year, divorce rape is minimal in your case. Go see an attorney, make a plan in case you need it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 02:37 PM
4

Why on earth would you go more than once. It costs a fortune and the world has so many other cool and educational places to explore with kids than to give your hard earned dollars to one of Americas biggest corporate giants. I hated it and the fact that you have to check your brain at the door, pay money for water everywhere and everyone and everything is fake. Get passports and go to Costa Rica or Panama or Canada or St. Martin, or Iceland or Europe - anywhere. Want to stay States side? Tons of…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/15 06:41 PM
1

See my reply to whinemoreplease. Still making mistakes (I will post one I'm thinking of in OYS Weekly), but this oil tanker is slowly changing course.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/15 06:32 PM
1

No. I don't take the abuse. Thanks to advice from fine gents like yourselves, material on side bar and my own practice I am slowly turning corner. But as we know it takes time to become an oak. And shit tests galore (not the foreplay type, but the mean aggressive bitch type, to get me to lose control). Last night for example I did not join her to one of her friends' house for dinner, then I held the line again when she was crying a river and practically begging me to go see a couples therapist. …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/15 06:30 PM
1

My wife's pregnant too man. I hear you. I took red pill 2-3 months ago and it's been such a roller coaster. She denies (all kinds of) sex, treats me like shit to phase me, it's very tough to hold back the dread and not escalate. In the past she used to manipulate me with her feelings and her hissy fits and her "buttons" and now that I started not to give in, to make fun of her when she's angry&bossy, she goes on the offensive and disrespects me. Calls me names. Baby due in fucking 5 weeks or so …
/r/MarriedRedPill02/05/15 11:15 PM
2

Nice age difference too. Good job.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/15 05:08 PM
1

When my wife brought up therapy and I declined, later she insisted on it and almost got me to agree. The way I handled that was "let's each come up with a list of what we want in a therapist and then we'll together look for one. I don't want to go to the one you already found and scheduled for us." She was like "ok what's on your list?" I go "not sure now, I have to think about it" . So she agreed that that was a good, inclusive idea that would involve both of us but then guess what. Conversatio…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/15 01:53 PM
1

Have you and your wife established a way in which you'll evaluate if therapy is worth tour time? I mean when will you both know it's over? I am asking because if it's unclear or your joint/ individual checklist is not completed as far as what you want to get our of it, how will you know that's it's time to stop.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 11:02 PM
1

This.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 09:19 PM
3

Dude. Read archwinger's post from a few days ago on TRP. Need to get shit off your chest? Do it here. Find a buddy you trust. Not to your woman. You don't understand her and how she'll perceive you when you "open up" like this. Where is the strong, in control, dominant alpha male behavior?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 11:12 AM
2

Echo the mods. Borderline insulting to this entire subreddit to nonchalantly state that you haven't even bothered to read sidebar. If you weren't married, I'd respectfully suggest please find another sub to post this in. ah wait, you're not actually married. Thanks and good luck.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 11:07 AM
3

What a a fucking aweosme post.
/r/TheRedPill28/04/15 11:01 AM
2

Welcome
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 02:20 PM
1

Actions speak louder than words. Take the long view. She'll get over it. What's (much more) important is what you do from now on and how you behave in similar situations in future. Not whether you apologize to her now and on this minute issue/ weekend. At the most I'd say: "I shouldn't have drank that much - I don't like what it does to me and it was wrong of me to give in control to alcohol like that." And leave it there. Move on.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 02:17 PM
1

Solid advice right here. Get fully alpha with this woman and then make a checklist of what you want in your FO, evaluate her against that. But remember you must keep the initiative and set the course for your journey. Beta behavior comes quickly when a couple settles down and he gets comfortable.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 12:47 AM
2

Sounds like a big reason why you'd do this is for your kids. What do you think about that, knowing what you know about RP etc. ? Could you just date her again? See how it goes? I mean tip toe your way back in, not full on.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/15 10:39 PM
2

Yeah and speaking of "bringing it up". Of course it's on my mind that I won the battle, but I am not going to be all "look honey, I told you so, we get along perfectly without a therapist". I pretend it never came up - let her figure it out that we ended up not going. I am STFU about it.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/15 11:31 AM
1

Similar here. My dad was a cheater and I decided in my twenties "that's not me. I will never cheat, I am not like that". A bit too righteous and naive. Not that I changed my mind and I want to cheat now, but I no longer see life in terms of "I have to conquer / be better than my dad".
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/15 10:58 AM
3

Makes sense - sort of. But personally I don't think it's the right approach. Financial success while providing more options than not, is a mirage. Money is means to an end and not an end in and of itself. I know tons of guys who had and have tremendous game, are happy, powerful, influential and have Ok financial success, some even less. "Money isn't everything, Mortimer". I'd focus on becoming wiser, stronger and more powerful. More of a leader amongst people. Good luck.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 10:23 PM
1

Work is slow these days and although I committed to not use work computer for reddit, I find myself on reddit on my iPhone. Let's say not too much. My problem is I use it during my commute. I catch myself and put it away to focus on the road. Only to then realize how many other drivers in traffic are on their smartphones. Amazing. This technology is straight up addictive. So I fight and fight to put the fucking smartphone away and focus on task at hand. I.e. Getting to the destination safely.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 10:12 PM
1

I am not following. Why stop readying posts here or elsewhere in the manosphere? What do you think that will accomplish?
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 08:38 PM
3

Here's a quote I read yesterday on /r/stoicism that really inspired me. Written by a smart guy who survived the holochaust: "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." Victor Frankl So recognize your thoughts and regrets as stimuli, then put in perspective what you want from life and long term. Then the short term path and your awareness of your feelings should become clearer. Plus if you re…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 11:02 AM
3

Definitely use a condom. Don't get get pregnant quite yet if you just unplugged and are unsure if she's mom material. And Have fun with it (Agent Provocateur is where it's at). This is normal for you and a man like you. So approach it from an abundance mentality. It's par for the course. It's not "holy shit it finally happens". Be James Bond tonight. He's getting tons of action.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 09:05 PM
4

No no please don't ban OP. This shit is entertaining.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 07:54 PM
4

Holy shit man - good job! Nice account and story here. W a y. To. G o !
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 04:55 PM
1

You keep missing the point it seems. This isn't about her. It's about you. She clearly doesn't want to fuck you. Who cares what she says to you? You should have laughed your ass off at that statement. And what do you mean by "save the marriage"?? What is it, a kid in Africa attacked by terrorists or malnutrition? Get real dude. This marriage is not serving you right now and if you don't change, it never will.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 04:43 PM
1

Good insight.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 02:33 PM
1

Wow dude- amazing. I've done same thing and she flipped out, slept in other room, called me sicko/ disrespectful then tried scheduling couples therapy. See my post here: http://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2zxvpb/pregnazoid_game_coachgive_hints_vs_long_quiet_game/ See my other post and great comments from two weeks ago on how I handled the "let's go see a therapist" topic. I also used to have a beer or two at night after work at home and I stopped that as it gave me a buzz and an edg…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 02:07 PM
3

Fucking awesome. "Now my place is all cleared up, do you want me to clear yours?" Never shy away from a little theatrics to make a point.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 01:54 PM
1

Great reminder... My wife denied me again last night, and now I am again tempted to sit her down over lunch and give her ultimatum type talk. But then again I am reminded I am early I my transformation, I have some small results but not enough , and it's time to suck it up and continue, apply newfound wisdom on OI and continue the course. It takes time...
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 12:03 PM
1

Yep - my read as well on the situation. You don't want to call attention to it. Life goes on, you are a busy man, and there's more important (way more important) shit to focus on out there than last night. Later, when things come down you can throw a bone in a conversation and say something like "I should've called you that, and it was a mistake". Leave it there.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 11:58 AM
2

Makes sense. Name calling is behavior women engage in when they "lose it". Otherwise walking out, getting angry is perfectly normal in my book. Heck, it fucking shows manhood!! Fuck yeah bitch piss me off and I am out of here. That's basically the unspoken message. And over time can be delivered - again, without words but trough actions- - even without the anger, which is reactive.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 11:55 AM
7

Go read books and start serious work on your MAP. Come back and report status in 2 months. Good luck. There are no shortcuts or quick fixes.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 01:46 AM
2

Read the books by friend. Read the books. This isn't about her and how she makes you feel. This is about you. You have to want her or not in your life. It's your life here - you're still talking from an angry, hurt place and you're still in her frame. Take bull by horns, start focusing on you and you will see how he dynamic in your relationship will change. If it doesn't it will not affect you because at that point you will be already ready and able to date so many more fucking hot young women. …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 01:25 AM
3

You rejected? WTF !!?? You should've fucked her brains out in that situation. Per your other post in /asktrp this is a woman who cheated on you, you don't have kids with and yet you're at a loss of what to do?? Coooooome on, maaaan.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 12:09 AM
2

Dude it's all in your head . You have no idea what cutting ties means when you have kids. There are guys here who have it a lot more complicated than you and have stood up to their wives and have faced life head on as parents and then single/ divorced parents. You have no idea how much harder it could be on your ass. So consider yourself lucky. Just get out now. You've already drank way more kool aid than it's cool and it's time I wake up. You sound like a decently smart guy so start directly wi…
/r/askTRP24/04/15 12:06 AM
2

Raise your SMV. Implement a plan then raise dread level gradually until eventually if she doesn't see you for the awesome man you are, then move on. Having no kids with her now is a huge plus for you. Read up on SMV charts and you will have an epiphany as to how much better your case is relative to hers at this point. Good luck.
/r/askTRP23/04/15 11:27 PM
4

Read the books, develop your own plan. And focus more on lifting as opposed to cardio. You want to be the man that the woman thinks can face danger not be really good at running away from danger. Good luck, and welcome.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 09:12 PM
3

Way to go bro. Good story. I am on a similar journey. Signed up for ashleymadison 2 yrs ago, landed a woman, was ready bang her then last minute I realized I don't want to cheat. Anyway took another 1yr plus to find RP and change mindset on marriage and talked to an atty to have plan B ready. Now I have a plan that may involve a similar ultimatum, and can see however that it's best if avoided altogether.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 05:05 PM
4

Definitely. It's fun and good practice. My approach is to simply be assertive, never break eye contact, be very playful, and fucking show what I like and what I want. That may include flirting why not. But for now I get hungry out and eat at home.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 03:35 PM
1

When the poor woman is PMS ing or is on her period, the time is for comfort and for getting her to do shit around house. Not to think "I won't have sex anyway so might as well set her straight". This is borderline insulting and demeaning, not to mention it weakens his case. OP sounds like an angry boy, not like an oak, alpha who know how to treat women. She has nothing to do with his making his own choices.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 03:31 PM
1

Yeah seriously. My wife's reply would have been something like "that's right. And you didn't so all these things because you're a complete wussy and puddy in my hands and I spin you around and spend your money and watch fucking sound of music with my mom anytime I want."
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 03:27 PM
1

You're either in the Anger stage or you're just not getting it, man. That reeks of beta victim puke like there's no tomorrow. What the fuck?! It's your job as a man to deal with shit like this you realize, not to bring it to her like she should care. What did you expect ? For her to go "aawwwww you poor soul, come here big boy put that big cock of yours in my mouth right now. I will make you FEEL all good all of a sudden" Careful - Rollo tells it like it is and it hurts like a MF when you use yo…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 02:50 PM
1

Thanks for sharing the details. That quote showed a mature, rational and well-adapted approach. It's as simple as that. The relationship is something that should serve you and you should enjoy in your life. If it doesn't do that and she shows up bitter, bitchy, cheap (i.e. does not want to give) then you can't help it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 02:32 PM
2

Recent unplugged here, 36 been married for 6 yrs, kids. I'd say you did pretty well. It's always tough in the beginning, as you start making changes. Important thing is to realize this is a long road, there will be bumps, and don't dwell on small failures like this. Shit tests will now increase, there will be plenty comfort tests too esp. With a small baby. Keep at it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 11:34 AM
1

Oh man that's fucked up ! "Welcome to therapy"??! WTF good luck ...
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 08:28 PM
2

See my similar situation and some great comments &help from the guys here: http://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/32bpef/my_a_wife_scheduled_couples_therapy/
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 08:24 PM
5

Keep at it. I recently unplugged as well and it's rough when she goes batshit all bitch and aggressive and treats you like an even bigger piece of shit than before (mine went ahead and scheduled couples therapy for us - see my earlier post - I said "no thanks, not now".). If you hold yourself (remember you're the oak or rock she is the weather - and right now it's stormy), do basic chores for the family and kids, improve yourself, there will be mountain of good, strong examples of how good a man…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 06:19 PM
4

Welcome. I'd be curious to learn more about how dysfunctional your marriage was (examples?) and what "residue / damage " you see it has on your kids at this time (again, some examples), now that you're having it Ok with our wife. I have two kids and another one coming so want to get an idea of what you've been through.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 05:56 PM
1

Yeah, my money is on DB mods slowly coming over here as they see the light. But we won't know it since they'll likely change usernames!
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 03:24 PM
1

Then again, you have some responsibility too. Never argue with a woman. You should be making fun of her and her petty drama. Read up more, lurk more, approach your relationship and interactions from YOUR frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 03:11 PM
2

Wow - sounds like a complete harpy who likes to always be right and set you straight. Then she acts all butthurt to get you to be like "oooh honey, what's wrong... Awww". Wait till you get married. My guess is you have outstayed your fun time in this relationship and you're in it because of some rationalization on how she's all worth your time. It's not. It will get way worse. Women like her have a hard time lightening up for some reason and play games to get you to beta bitch and be the Nice Gu…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 03:10 PM
1

Keep going man. You're just starting your path. Keep at it.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 01:27 PM
3

Very similar here too. Took red pill and started ~ 2 months ago. Very tempting to sit her down and matter of factly tell her how things will be from now on. But that time has not come yet. First my plan is to build a solid track record 6-9 months of changes: stronger body, focus, OI, no more beta in the house, better &more active with my kids and all the other good stuff I want to deliver on in my life. This way when and if we have that conversation, I will have facts and evidence to back me up.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 01:24 PM
3

This. "Manipulative, self serving, child like sluts" . Gold.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 06:11 PM
2

I used to love computer programming. GW Basic (way back when) and toyed around with VBA. Thanks for reminder - will check out the link.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 04:40 PM
2

Hear, hear. Well done guys.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 03:29 PM
2

Hahaha this is awesome. OP: probably best way to influence wife to please you in that category is through (a) humor like this and (b) rewarding her when she does shave.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 09:35 PM
6

I want to see similar analysis on how often you go to the gym and how you have started to gradually increase weight you lift in basics like bench press, dead lifts, row and squats.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 09:33 PM
2

Right on right here. Upvote this bad boy.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:01 PM
5

What you don't know can't hurt you. What's said cannot be taken back - she will now always know and remember this. Even if you do think it's a mistake, it's one you have to deal with as a man not one you start bragging about. I guess it all depends on your relationship with your spouse and if indeed communicating this lousy cheating episode increases your power in the marriage. Otherwise I agree with /u/whinemoreplease and indeed it's a victim puke and a sign you can't handle your own burden - w…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:00 PM
3

You told your wife about it??? WTF what Own Your Shit rule is that? And what good does that do? To you or her or anyone ?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 05:51 PM
1

Yeah, ignore it now. Water under bridge. Maybe there was a smarter, wittier response you could have had, but at this point the more you draw attention to it... you guessed it: you'll be in her frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 01:30 PM
3

Great explanation. For example, going for a run or a walk or to the gym can be an effective way of expressing emotions.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 01:27 PM
1

Wow - very well said. Thanks for the insight.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 01:23 AM
1

There may be hope for you. You sound like you hold her on a pedestal, which is not good. On the other hand you went through the effort of posting your story here and as you mentioned there are glimpses of reality every now and then that you experience. So deep inside of you, you know and have a gut feeling that this relationship is not going places. You have to make some serious changes in your attitude and how you perceive her. Good luck my friend.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 08:21 PM
1

No no, definitely not in leu of, but to supplement. Been lifting 3-4 times / week and I absolutely love it.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 04:43 PM
1

Thanks - I will check out Games People Play, it's at my local library so that's good. And good reminder on foreign languages.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 02:28 AM
1

Thanks - I added it to my list, and it's at local library.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 02:24 AM
3

Rock on brother. Good to hear back story.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/15 06:23 PM
1

My other comment is getting down voted so I will explain here: this looks like fun art. However it's bumper sticker culture at work which to me reeks of blue pill and tantrum, childish, approval seeking behavior.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/15 06:02 PM
-4

What are you, 17?
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/15 04:14 PM
1

Your last line is golden. Learn to enjoy it. You are her alpha. Now when a bunch of young lads show up and subtly challenge your status there are some cool nonverbal ways to establish yourself and scare them off. You basically want to communicate you're in control of your pack and they should not mess around with any of you or yours - mostly through nonverbal behavior. You already got some good advice here. The key is to be at ease and maybe look those punks deep in the eye if they're challengin…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/15 03:56 PM
2

With all due respect professor, how is your advice for OP to convert to Christianity in line with RP philosophy and practice?
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/15 03:05 PM
1

Yes - and it's good practice to then not get phased when wife bitches and complains about you decision (Esp. early in your transformation when wife hasn't learned to follow your lead). I had our fence repaired and installed a new mailbox the other day. Then wife freaks out over text about how the mailbox is black and not white, how I didn't consult her and how he mailman will not be able to access it - just a bunch of trivial nonsense. I did not respond in the text (duh) and when she asked me li…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/15 06:00 PM
1

Way to go. Again walking that fine line of communicating what you want and doing it a way that creates desire not the opposite. You are strong and it worked because your actions and being a leader otherwise back you up. Then you can be more overt with demands, esp. If it's spontaneous like that.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/15 05:13 PM
2

Yeah talk about misleading title. Great job OP
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/15 10:01 PM
1

You're the mountain, you'll weather this storm and definitely don't make it worse by throwing your own tantrum. Slow it down with the changes and dread. I made a list of shit I do in house, that I don't want and should not do longer term (my wife is SAHM too). Like empty dish washer, vacuum family room and a few others. I can't all of a sudden put this all on her, but gradually I will say no to shit she's delegating my way and gradually make myself so busy with other worthy projects (outside wor…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/15 05:14 PM
1

I think you found that unique opportunity to provide leadership through communication. Ultimately the job of a leader is to communicate. However that's very tough to maintain at home from RP standpoint, when you're dealing with permanently emotionally charged relationship with FO. So what it sounds like is you found an avenue to communicate to your wife more along the lines of self improvement and gave her a pep talk, maybe indeed it will motivate her to become better. My wife has similar issues…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/15 10:49 AM
2

Good post and good examples. Thank you
/r/MarriedRedPill14/04/15 06:57 PM
1

I too have pregnant FO and it's been tough maintaining frame without seeming like an asshole. One thing I did yesterday is buy her flowers and presented to her with a "baby this is for all your hard work over the weekend" - she barely looked at them, but later put them in a vase and I know the hamster will think positive thoughts for days looking at them. In truth she stepped up and prepared picnic for my family who was in town, did tons of laundry and despite overall bitchiness coming out of he…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/04/15 04:58 PM
1

Yeah man. It's your ego and your past naïveté. Do you think she just dreamt of how to give BJs and then all of a sudden knew how to give them to you? Wake up bro - and while you're at it, you have it pretty good from what you're describing, so find a real problem to tackle - your wife's past ain't it.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/04/15 12:01 PM
1

Yeah I found our about it on this subreddit and subscribed. Thoroughly entertaining. Seriously what I never get is how someone who is [enter ridiculously large weight here] lbs ever got a that level when he /she was [enter same huge amount minus 30 lbs, which is still all in a very large, unhealthy number] lbs - that means the never freaking realized something was wrong and he/she just kept on.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/15 08:00 PM
1

What do you mean by " we would have to go to therapy anyway, because we had kids." ? And to be clear I am not ruling it out, I am at this time saying No to this one and terms she set. So that's good counsel as far as coming up with checklist and mutually agreeing on one. Also in your case what made you more comfortable with a woman therapist? I sort of have opposite bias.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/15 12:50 PM
2

Great read and strong referenced - thanks for posting.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 09:00 PM
1

Yeah that's absolutely right. I can't see anything good coming out of seeing a couples therapist.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 08:43 PM
1

Thanks- good counsel.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 08:38 PM
1

Thanks - solid advice. Complete, balanced, rational sense.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 08:35 PM
1

Thanks- indeed and I am aware it will take a long time for things to improve, if they'll ever.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 08:34 PM
1

Thanks.... Similar boat. Realized I probably shouldn't have said I Do to this person. Glimmer of hope though, and that's what I am working on. It will be up to her.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:47 PM
1

Awesome, thank you, solid advice. If indeed we end up going (doubtful: i 'd rather assertively say no, maintain frame and not do it, plus it's a waste of money) this is definitely the right approach.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:45 PM
0

Thanks. If we do end up going (doubtful) that's a good approach.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:43 PM
1

Yeah right on brother.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:42 PM
1

Solid - thanks, appreciate the suggested lines.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:42 PM
1

Thanks - appreciate the insight and encouragement. good luck to you as well
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:40 PM
1

This does seem like a very ballsy move...
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:39 PM
1

Well a few things change for sure, like legal stuff and executing on an exit plan proper that allows me to keep max of my assets and custody etc. plus her hamster is really out of wack.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:36 PM
1

Yes, actively pursuing those conversations and putting an exit plan in place for when timing is right.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:35 PM
1

Yes, I would agree in our case it failed, or at least me communicating my desires and needs (old BP me) as opposed to acting like I deserve them (RP).
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:34 PM
1

Yes for the most part. We have had issues in the past, when it was me getting angry and clueless on how to handle her, myself. Now I have newfound wisdom and I don't engage her in arguments like I used to, and that drives her nuts. I am no longer giving free foot massages (only did it once 10 days ago or so after we had sex) and act all beta bitch around her and that drives her even more disrespectful and bitchy to get me to lose frame and have a reaction and engage her nonsense. I am dealing wi…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/15 07:32 PM
2

Yeah man great work and thanks for sharing what's possible. On my journey here and I feel like I will get to that point 9-12 months from now. Good to hear things can indeed change at that point.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/15 11:57 PM
1

Freaking awesome man! Great story thanks for sharing it. I find myself in so much of what you're describing as the nice beta guy. Wag to go!
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/15 11:31 AM
2

Have you actually met with an attorney to realistically and rationally evaluate your options? Are you really considering leaving wife and having her have full custody? You have to paint that scenario fully in your mind and on paper and decide with a lot more information which path to take. And definitely cut the drinking as it seriously clouds your judgment in moments like these. (I like to drink and party, don't get me wrong, but at same time I have learned that as a father and fucking adult, y…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 11:49 PM
1

Leaving a wife is a big decision. Leaving kids is an even bigger decision. If you're seriously contemplating such paths, do it after going through a thorough and as objective as possible a process as you can, where indeed you will be at peace with yourself for having reached whatever decision you reach. From what you're writing, you sound like a horny teenager who's found keys to daddy's car. Get back to a manly, rational and balanced way of looking at the world before you do anything that has m…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 05:16 PM
1

Similar situation: recent RP convert, two young girls and bitchy wife. Going through anger - related asshole phase, so that's my biggest thing right now I am managing. Trying to be an overcompensating fake alpha. It's tough, but with time (two weeks is nothing) you will make it. Look to not add hurt and be a jerk especially during this time when you guys are sleep deprived with kids so young and a lot of what she may throw at you are comfort tests not shit tests. Take long view and don't do stup…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 03:32 PM
2

What a trainwreck of a show. It hurts to watch.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 01:11 AM
2

yeah man. Good write-up. And good reminder. It is astonishing what the hamster will say, just to get you to lose frame. Have tons of examples but I haven't reached the level of mastery to play with it just for fun. I guess it starts with recognizing it, and not engaging it. - like BPprofessor said, scratch it, pet it, but DO NOT FEED IT.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 12:34 AM
3

Wow - good to hear. Curious, how soon did you have that talk 2 yrs ago after you started your MAP? I took pill ~1month ago, started changing things, lifting, becoming more OI, etc. and my wife is prego (3rd kid coming), so part of me wants to have the talk now to tell her openly things will have to change but then again another part wants to wait until prego over and things are back to "normal". I really want to have the talk because I am not getting any kind of sex attention (any kind of jobs..…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/15 03:08 PM
1

Haven't read it (yet). Is it RP? Or at least Purple? Worth reading? Thanks,
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/15 02:27 PM
5

My wife tends to be like that and stubborn / strong headed when it comes to our kids. Mostly because she's a SAHM but also substantially because of social conditioning- somehow she thinks she knows best when it comes to kids. I'd say there's a path they have to walk and sounds like you're doing a good job of asserting yourself, maintaining frame and calmly showing the way: decisions about the kids are in no way unilaterally taken by her. When she sees that she becomes more amenable and slooooowl…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/15 01:05 PM
1

Having listened to the Christian McQueen interview and reading this, the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. This is a hugely important, yet subtle piece. Your woman should admire and respect you. Looking at my in laws, I am wondering "does my wife's mom admire and respect my wife's dad?" The answer I come up with is a most likely No. What's there to admire about him? All he does is watch TV (he's "retired") and has probably been BP for most of his life. Hence my wife doesn't have a …
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/15 12:52 PM
2

What book did you give her?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/15 12:07 PM
1

Man, you're only 24 so having been 24 a decade ago I can tell you you're going to keep on changing and evolving and maturing. So go with it and recognize you're growing and changing. Don't get chained to the decisions you made as a 20-yr old now. Step back , look at things fresh and change your personality, behavior and whatever you want about your life to better suit you in the present and in the future. The rest is details.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/15 12:05 PM
1

I struggle with this too. How do I escalate to clearly communicate expectations but without seeming needy (which has killed me in the past). Personally my answer so far is just keep working on the MAP, and work on longer term plan, become more fully OI.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 09:22 PM
1

Wow - that is an awesome idea. Curious, professor, after how many weeks/months of working on your MAP did you have that clear communication on expectations on the 5 day clock? I can't implement something like that now due to pregnancy (3rd trim) but soon after she's done I want to be ready to have that convo.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 09:20 PM
1

Most certainly at that level of income you should see an attorney. You will continue to be a high earner, while biology says that she has a MUCH greater chance of not, and taking a break. Maybe a long break. So be smart about it and get professional advice. Now is the time.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 09:14 PM
2

That's good counsel. This will help you put your experience and accomplishments in a good light, which should raise your self esteem. You are given 80 hours of work /week because you must be good at it /at something - so turn that situation around and put it in a positive light.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 06:23 PM
3

Welcome Start small and keep track. Make a plan where you put yourself first. Like go to the gym or at least do fucking 50 push ups every morning for a month. Build on that. Again, start somewhere/ small but start. And keep track. And 3.: Remember you still have it way better than 90% of the world's population and you're young. So man up, smile and slooooowly work your way up to a better path.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 04:05 PM
1

Sounds like your kids are used to going to sleep in your guys' bed before you love them to theirs. I'd cut that shit out ASAP. Kids should learn to fall asleep on their own in their own little beds. May be a small thing but your bedroom is our bedroom.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 03:06 PM
1

As far as sending it to wife I'd say it depends on where you guys are at in your relationship. I itch all the time to send her stuff like this or some good recent postings from sub reddit deadbedrooms (there's a good one written by a woman who apparently had an epiphany after reading lots of postings from HL men disappointed with their wives weaponizing and restricting sex, and who as a result did a 180 and offers sex all the time to hubby, is happy Etc.). Where I am at with my wife it would lik…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/15 02:52 PM
2

While this doesn't solve some of your other major issues with this woman, I have to say this is a very compelling comment. Right on bro.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/15 11:32 PM
2

Thought so. Good to know. Thanks. Going back to work now...
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/15 08:37 PM
2

Great story on getting success. Curious, when did you start your MAP? She has to be in the right mindset to respond to these tactics. All that takes time. At least that's my experience…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/15 07:40 PM
2

Yeah man - Confidence is preparation. Everything else is beyond your control. You seem unprepared. Go research single dads, read up on and paint the scenario that you want to live in that includes being a strong father, very involved in your kids' lives and that does not involve a cheating, disappointing wife. Definitely change your perspective. You're not leaving behind anyone.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/15 03:48 PM
1

Try this http://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2m72x0/mrp_theory_the_main_event/
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 08:02 PM
3

Definitely I am a fan of several on this list, especially the Taking Notes part. Nice write-up.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 07:39 PM
4

Definitely lawyer up man. Cheating shows she indeed has crossed a serious barrier and behavior you describe is grounds for filing for full custody. Get on Dads Divorce Forum, read "The list", get the initiative, prepare for a scenario in which YOU file first, use hard data and evidence of abuse like that. You may not get full custody, but if you file and ask for a lot and prove she's a fucking unstable emotional unworthy mother, then you have a much stronger case. Definitely get professional leg…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 07:38 PM
1

OK - read the Main Event- again from the Wiki. Solid story on importance (and example) of being steadfast in your determination. You have to work on REALLY getting outcome independence. What is worse? "Divorce rape" or suffering as you do now and for the rest of your marriage? Paint he divorce rape scenario really well and learn to not fear it. Or if you do, then - again - you know the answer. I too am on my way of having 3 kids and I used to be in the camp of "I'll never get divorced, kids woul…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 07:34 PM
3

Read the levels of dread, from the Wiki. Lots of good material that will inform this question, and will help you make your own checklist as objectively as you can. Good luck.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 04:55 PM
1

We used to go gym a lot together, now not so much given prego. She would study me from her treadmill and then (before RP) would throw jabs at me with "I saw you working out - you don't really know what you're doing". Now I go religiously (+4 times/week), got a few classes with a trainer, lift with a notebook, track everything. She has no idea. And a HUGE part of me constantly (my freaking BSG!!) wants to go: "look honey, check out what I am doing, I am lifting! See?? Wait till you see how hot I'…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 04:47 PM
1

Similar stage here.... recently unplugged (several weeks) and sometimes I am able to smile at her, look her up and down and tease her with my grin (she has started to pick on my it), yet other times I am angered by her bitchiness and when I realize how she treats me. It's tough and a fine line: I go back to bed thinking it's my constant job, my constant burden, to lead the woman (and my kids) and that this is the way it's always going to be. I constantly have to be the leader, cut short unaccept…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/15 04:40 PM
1

Good reminder post. Nice reference to IKEA furniture in FC movie.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/15 10:58 AM
2

3 weeks? Are you familiar with the expression "drop in a bucket"? You need to get physical distance between you and this infectious, sick, suicidal, dangerous person you're describing. Do that first before you do anything else then report back on this forum - before then, we're just changing music on the Titanic. We know how it's going to end if you don't get out. Bad.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 06:03 PM
6

"took a knife and started scratching her hands. "? Man, get out man. Get professional help (psychiatric ) for her. Call 911.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 05:05 PM
1

Good insights. The mindless consumption bandwagon plus keeping up with the Jones' mentality are huge, unseen bad influences on an individual and his/her capacity for a healthy relationships.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 10:36 AM
5

Most definitely. Hard to change and improve from this level. Read stories from guys here. Sex drys up if you're not careful even from very frequent levels. From where you are: you're only going to make yourself even more miserable if you keep her.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 08:58 AM
1

You're ahead of me but I will offer my $0.02: - Keep doing what you're doing, looks like it's working. - My wife loves to cook too and she does all the time. Though she also likes cookies (has bad example in her family with her mom has got a freaking eating disorder, she can't stop until she goes through a plate/bag of cookies) and has put on pounds since kids. I found the trick there is to become more health conscious (we've watched all kinds of documentaries together) and we started cooking to…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 12:51 AM
3

Great post and story. Thanks for sharing it. I am through a similar phase now - it's like I am "faking" it in a way, very carefully minding my new behavior, tools and techniques and possibly overly self conscious in the process- a natural turn-off. Have to make it to the other side and continue to wrestle with it until it's all from a natural alpha state.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 03:52 PM
1

Yeah, the fact that you are wondering about this and going through the trouble of asking this question holds the very answer to it. If this were a clear, good idea you would not hesitate. Why spend your money on raising her SMV, when as far as you care you are the only M in "SMV" for her.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 03:28 PM
1

Thank you - good stuff.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 01:29 PM
1

Thank you - really good insight and counsel.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 01:28 PM
1

Thanks - appreciate your insight. Re-reading my own post 2 weeks later and with greater clarity things start to very slowly make more sense. This is indeed the long road.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 01:25 PM
1

Golden. Thanks, good counsel.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 02:07 AM
2

Good ones, I will keep in mind. (my reply to dude on beach at that time was a simple smile and "We're not that kind of couple").
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/15 03:07 PM
6

Good post. Yeah - it's amazing the prevailing "wisdom" with "oh, what did your wife say?" or "wait till your wife finds out" or "you're going to be in the doghouse". My favorite recent memory - after I had just swallowed the RP - I almost get killed in a ocean/boating accident, my wife is freaking out on the beach waiting for my safe return etc. and then the next morning a neighbor goes "I am surprised you don't have any more bruises from your wife" . I am like WTF!? Are you for real? Dude was i…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/15 02:06 PM
2

Keep in mind this woman will not be forever gone from his life though. They have a kid together so it's important to be civil and as courteous and calm as possible once the dust settles. There will be many many interactions that these two will have as part of raising the kid. The last thing he'd want is for the anger and aggressive behavior to continue as the kid grows. So I'd say be the adult, look past short term problems, and coach the darn woman as best as possible to get her shit together ,…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/15 01:15 PM
3

Definitely patch that hole - do as best as you can to erase the episode from living memory, while YOU learn all lessons and never lose your temper again in front of her and kid, no matter what.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/15 12:12 PM
2

What I started doing is documenting shit like this and inappropriate behavior on her part toward me or kids in emails. Depending on how you guys are used to communicating this may or may not work for you. So what I do the morning after shit happens and she gets out of control, I write her a gentle email describing what happened and how it's not cool for kids, us etc. My purpose is to document this behavior for he future. Look up dads divorce forum, I found some good advice there on how you can't…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/15 11:46 AM
2

"I don't know what I'm doing;" ? What are the top 3 things you did or are going to do for yourself today to advance toward your long term goals and MAP? What did you do first thing today before anything else? Focus, focus on what's important. In the grand scheme of things your wife having "an edge to herself today" will bring nothing than a gentle smile on your face. Keep frame man.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/15 07:45 PM
5

hey the only issue with that that I see (maybe it just reads that way) is that it can be spoken /interpreted like you're butthurt. I have had to set the record straight with my wife in the past where for example I had to very calmly say to her, please stop yelling at me. When you're ready to talk like adults, I will be in my office/living room/kitchen etc. Or when she interrupts me when I talk (fuck she does that all the time) I used to say "please don't interrupt me when I speak" - now I just c…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/15 07:13 PM
2

Man that sucks. My wife does shit like this but then a day or two into it she can't take it anymore and comes to be with the issues (and blame, of course) and for me to fix her emotional shit. My initial reaction and advice is to ignore. Let your frame eventually win out the day. (Bluepillprofessor had similar advice for me recently, which I see starting to work: something along the lines of your frame is of a happy/dominant/successful leader. Her is one of bitchy/negative/shitty attitude. Whose…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/15 06:48 PM
7

I don't know man... I wouldn't put a price on happiness. Forget the money. If you're in a good marriage - great. But if your marriage sucks for years in a row, then no amount of money would justify the wasted years in unhappy circumstances. Life is short.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/15 12:48 AM
1

Great insight
/r/MarriedRedPill29/03/15 01:52 AM
1

Classic SNL skit comes to mind https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AbgPcwLTMWo
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 10:37 PM
1

I can't upvote this enough. When you're 41 in prime time SMV, she will be 41 too. When you're 51, hey she'll be 51 too...
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 09:40 PM
1

This is golden. Don't rush man, don't rush...
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 09:39 PM
1

Great fucking post. I am thinking of printing it or saving it as reference for the future. Well done man.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 09:29 PM
3

Good story. Sounds like you handled it quite well. Curious, what was her hubby's attitude throughout the whole thing? Did he jump to defend her in any way? Condone her behavior?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 05:59 PM
1

Yeah, echo those good tips you got already. My wife is very close with her parents too so I can relate somewhat. Any change in my behavior is magnified as they all talk and evaluate and form opinions - fucking groupthink. So you don't want to seem butthurt, even if you think you're not. Have to be a bit sneaky with those in laws...
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 02:32 PM
1

I like this. That's what I would do.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 11:48 AM
1

What are you guys doing from a spiritual growth standpoint and in what ways are you creating opportunities for her to open her mind? For example; I like to volunteer and work with nonprofits and it's been eye opening for my wife when I took her to various events for her to see how shitty of a deal a lot of people around this country and the world have. Experiences like that tend to have the classic effect of "now I can appreciate what we truly have" and also put you in a strong leadership positi…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/15 11:15 AM
1

You're probably where I wish I will be in 3 years. So good work. My wife is often negative like that too, her dad is blue pill (asks her mom all the time what they're doing next - it's nuts), her mom runs the household where my wife grew up. That said when it comes to divorce that's where my wife I think has a strong bias ingrained toward preserving the marriage - sounds similar to what you describe. So all that's to say that you probably have a very strong hand if you up the ante, communicate e…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/15 10:43 AM
2

Hi and welcome. I'll give you a brief overview: (1) this is the long game, so there's no quick fix. (2) start by reading side bar recommended books. (3) not sure if you're ready to buy books and dedicate hours of study? Read the posts from the Wiki page on this subreddit. Once again, welcome and good luck with the road ahead buddy.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/03/15 01:24 PM
3

Ah, without a doubt. Every nation has the leader it deserves. So he is a complete cold blooded ruthless killer, in charge of an oppressive government full of crooks and corrupts. Russia is a tough place, man. And he is one tough MF to be in charge of it for so long and to pupetteer others under his command with an iron fist. So from that standpoint, I do admire him and his longevity in power. Purely from a cold, outcome-based Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power, standpoint.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/15 03:22 PM
2

Yeah man - amazing. My daughter does the exact same thing and she's 4. Like asks me to carry things for her and other stuff like that. Kids are natural alpha seekers / beta identifiers.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/15 03:15 PM
1

Excellent post - thank you. Love the Vladimir Putin badass reference.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/15 01:53 PM
1

Yes that makes sense
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/15 11:18 PM
1

We cuddled our kids to sleep for their first few months, can't remember maybe 6-9 tops. That early age (in our view ) is / was when we didn't want baby to feel abandoned. And after that we gradually removed it and let them cry it out. Worked out great. Also I was the one that took pacifiers away, can't remember when ~ around 18-20 months or so. It was nuts for a day or two since we went cold turkey, but it paid off quickly. And waaaay Better than many other older kids still holding the thing in …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/15 11:16 PM
2

Lost frame on Sunday. Wife went out with her friend, came back 6hrs later, I had the kids, we mostly had a good time and I did a bunch of things around the house. When she came home I gradually lost frame, had a beer (I told myself I will stay 100% sober and not drink at home anymore, unless it's a glass of wine with her), helped make dinner (she was like "I am so hungry", basically almost said feed me feed me). Then after dinner I decided I wanted to watch some light comedy and put The 40 Year …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/15 02:35 PM
1

Agree. We used that book also and it made a huge difference. Kids sleep = you sleep = world is already a better place.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/15 02:24 PM
3

You need to raise your confidence level in yourself. Through working on your MAP diligently. It's not cool to think that she's so far ahead if you in terms of SMV that you can't reach her in less time. Think about it - she's pregnant, she'll have a kiddo soon - those will naturally reduce her SMV. Now if she's picking on you as you lounge around that's not a good sign. Is try to make fun of her and also to not be that available to begin with so she doesn't have anyone to pick on if you're lot th…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/15 02:11 AM
1

Welcome. Stay on it. Lots of great advice here from solid guys. I joined myself reddit a few weeks ago as one of my break free activities from NMMNG. MRP subreddit is truly my support group, the "don't go it alone" tool in your toolbox which is hugely important.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/15 03:15 PM
3

This looks like a good idea. I will implement. You're basically saying success is initiating sex, not getting sex. Right? You approach say 2 or 3 times, do it confidently like James Bond or some other alpha character role model, and then reward yourself for having done it. Again, regardless of the outcome. So you make the reward something else, not the sex. That's what I think you mean here.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/15 01:57 PM
6

I would have given it to her. Why hold back? "Teaching a lesson" that way can backfire. Give it to her good, have some fun, practice dominance for gods sake. And as far as her initial preference for phone and facebooking over spending time with you - that depends on what went on in the day until that point. Did you charm her, hit on her, plan the day/ week from your frame, so she can't say No to you and expects to submit to her alpha / man when approached?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 11:56 PM
1

Great idea
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 07:00 PM
1

Awesome post
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 04:41 PM
3

Good advice. I am in similar boat... Haven't gotten everything I want though I do know my wife has a slutty side which she showed me in the past a few times (like sex on an airplane, sex on the beach, suck me while I drive, wear hot lingerie etc.) - I have to rekindle that though as haven't seen that side in a long time, and indeed it takes time. Good point on if you can get her, it's going to be win win with other women, should that ever be a real possibility.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 04:35 PM
1

And by "let's talk" I mean, let HER talk and vent. A quiet woman is a bad sign. You be the mountain, and don't get entangled. Over time, it's actions and your gradual implementation of your MAP that is likely to make a difference. Not anything you will say when she is in those angry states. Good luck.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 04:31 PM
2

One more thing. Sounds like you just started therapy. That may be good in at least establishing some ground rules and getting her to realize it's not OK at all to act disrespectfully and to diminish you. At your stage, forget attraction and sex (maybe you could have make-up sex - you be the judge of that, but sounds like that's far off). At this stage it's about enforcing boundaries and simply things like "I will not be talked to this way. When you're ready to be calm, let's talk". What helped m…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 04:29 PM
0

This is good advice in my opinion. Best thing to do in those anger stages when you're at each other's throats is to simply walk away, remove yourself from the situation - physically. You are better equipped to handle the emotions than she is. Take your time. Don't get dragged in the fight. The moment you "fight" with a woman you lose.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/15 03:34 PM
10

I read a good piece of advice on this subreddit a few days ago which I am starting to implement: don't talk about it, just hit on her and act sensual and sexual toward here when you want to initiate it. Basically, light some candles, put some music on and hit on her. Don't talk about it with things like "let's go upstairs" or "let's have sex tonight" - that to me has led to a lot of disappointments over the years as it gave her something to say No to or find excuse around. So I'd act sexual towa…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/03/15 09:53 PM
1

Depends on your situation, but it sounds like you're just getting started with RP life. Just reading WISNIFG now and applying a few techniques is a good start, but this is a LONG road. Your wife sounds a bit like mine. Anyway, some of the advice may be good - like go ahead and take 2-3 days off - but that could hurt you too. If your wife plays hardball (mine tends to) and dig here heels she may call your bluff as opposed to you hers. So you should REALLY own it and indeed meet with an attorney, …
/r/MarriedRedPill21/03/15 09:37 PM
1

they don't stay with us, they always stay in a hotel close-by after an episode 4 years ago when there was a big fall-out with my wife (my mom openly judged her and disrespected her when she was pregnant with our first - big drama- and I had to pack my mom's shit and put her in a hotel (amazingly my wife was very sexual that night I will never forget it - I guess she dug my alpha move, I was clueless at the time). It was not pretty but since then we've had boundaries which involved them never eve…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/15 07:41 PM
1

seriously, my daughter does it all the time. It's hilarious.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/15 04:38 PM
1

Hang in there man... in similar boat. Wife currently going apeshit and pulling all kinds of drama to get my attention and get me to think of "her needs" etc.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/15 04:26 PM
0

Well, I haven't read all your posts but regardless I'd have nothing to be ashamed about. You can get "busted" for a lot of worse things. Wait till she starts racing you in the SMV game and this may actually be a lot of fun for you guys. Your game has just got a lot harder.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/15 12:45 AM
1

I can share that some of Athol's ideas were great (eg 10s kiss, start reeeeeally slow with training for BJs etc) while others not so much. I took it mostly like "here's what worked for me".
/r/MarriedRedPill19/03/15 07:15 PM
1

Can you please elaborate? Not quite getting difference between that answer and yours. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill17/03/15 08:19 PM
2

There's no military police on a pirate ship. My boss is a former army captain and is the most people person, visionary leader I have worked with. He has authority that comes from his knowledge, exceptional hard work, sense of duty and dedication to the mission (business, that is), and very well acted care for the team. I am not delusional or drink the kool aid - I know he doesn't care for me as a person, but he plays the role of leader so well that people want to follow him and are motivated by …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/03/15 02:14 PM
1

Sounds to me you should get more clear on what you want in the bedroom and communicate that to her. Up the dominating part of you and go live your fantasies with her. Indeed it sounds like she is submissive toward you, but then again if you don't take care of the problem she may not be too happy about it & stick around. So go make a plan - as MMSLG covers: you must have a plan for what you want her to do for you in the bedroom. That's what I would do..., I'd F&* her brains out dude. Go through t…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/03/15 09:04 PM
2

Right on. I have 2 daughters, much younger than 8 and can see the shit testing is already on- has been on for awhile. It's amazing how subtle it is and how well they respond to alpha/beta behavior. They take after their mom and want to give me things to do (I recently took the RP... so bear with me as I work on responding to that). I play with them and I gently enforce standards and basic adult discipline, like wait your turn etc. They start crying "It's not fair!!". Then they shit test their ol…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/03/15 08:52 PM
1

And thanks for that reminder - Rollo's piece on sticking to men, dirty chores and not taking over hers.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/15 11:14 PM
1

No, not chore play at all. Not doing shit around the house to impress anybody and get my wife wet over it. Doing it to set the example of not tolerating laundry not getting done for days and piling up, and to communicate independence. I am not taking over her responsibilities. I am simply stepping up to show I do not need her and that shit has to get done, no more lazy. As I step up and do one chore I didn't do before I delegate two more to her. Now as far as Athol Kay Thanks for that link. I am…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/15 10:58 PM
1

Yeah man - get rid of Diablo, get off Reddit and go do your man's job - and have fun. Make a plan and live your fantasies without getting distracted. It's your frame. Your job is to dominate and sounds like you have yourself a lady who gets it.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/15 05:08 PM
2

Yes- spot on. I noticed the same. Any "meanie" type of reply or comment backfires as my wife is highly intuitive and basically smells weakness in comments like that. Have to be careful to make them from a dominating, strong position and in jest/light fun at how she's is a naughty girl - not from a frustrated position.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/15 04:57 PM
3

If you're saying "I don't give a fuck about anything" - that's a bad sign. Sounds like she gets to you. I go through that stage too - and then I smile and remind myself, our job as men is never done. This is outcome independence. She comes along and sees how fucking awesome of a fucking catch you are - great. Let her partake and let the two of you gave tons of fun. She does not see it and is a bitch who is not interested - cut her loose, and again: great. It won't be easy but then again who said…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/15 04:52 PM
0

Laundry my friend, laundry. Read MMSLG by Athol Kay. Dude is a genius.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/15 04:36 PM
2

Wow man, you nailed it. Awesome post. As I read, I kept thinking "yep, that's us", so we have aspects of each scenarios. Sometimes it feels like 1, mostly like 2 (I have found I tend to be a huge people pleaser) and like 3 too sometimes, though I have cut her short a lot and wouldn't tolerate extreme examples of taking over and berating me. Great post. I will come back to it often.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/15 12:18 PM
2

yeah, my wife is very similar in that she controls (and until now or recently I have been mostly passive about it) the calendar, social stuff, family, events, esp. travel. However, I am the only one with access to bank accounts, investments and I pay the bills. Even her school loans (I know...). So my battle is to (a) delegate slightly more of this menial stuff to her, like paying random bills, and (b) gradually fill calendar ahead of time with my stuff (which I started, with things like martial…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/15 12:52 AM
2

Yeah my wife tends to be lazy too. She freaking stays online, surfs, looks up vacations, buys dog toys, looks for bargains, she is basically acting like the Procurement department for our family. Her stuff is a mess, each drawer (except for kitchen items that are well put away) holding her shit, in each room is a mess. VERY disorganized. Today I took the bull by the horns and got in the kids playroom (couldn't take it anymore) and stayed on top of them until they cleaned up. She regularly yells …
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/15 12:52 AM
2

IMO a biiiig piece of how you treat this situation is indeed HOW you act when you read around her and how you respond when she asks you. If you are deeply or openly cautious about it and afraid of her reaction, and that she may disapprove - then you already lost and it's likely because you're in a beta state of mind. Indeed, an assertive "I am reading a self improvement book" goes a lot farther (that was in my case how I answered it when she asked me) than "well, check this out, this amazing new…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/15 05:47 PM
2

Definitely. I see a lot of alpha and beta behaviors and attitudes out there. Just one example that was very powerful to me recently on a family vacation in Central America ( during that time I read Rollo Tomasi's book and NMMNG. This was my wake up call and my RP moment.) Anyway, so as I am gradually evaluating my life, adjusting my behaviors, journaling like crazy on what went wrong etc what I need to do differently when back from vaca, on the day before last I go paddle boarding with my buddy.…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/03/15 03:15 PM
1

Thank you. Got them.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/03/15 01:52 AM
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