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shakethat_milkshake Archive

View 2 posts and 273 comments by shakethat_milkshake on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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37

Isn't it curious that that's even a question women are prompted to ask themselves but men never would, as this thread demonstrates? Our socialization sets us up to fail.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 10:27 PM
7

Omgggg he's literally Milton from Office Space lmao.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 10:16 PM
1

Yes. What you’re experiencing is “being off balance” which is the opener that abusers look for to find the right target.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 09:18 PM
2

You are absolutely correct. It’s why we vet for a long time. When men use words, they err toward the most convenient meaning of those words lol but inconsistencies in their actions and how they carry themselves are harder to be weaselly about.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 08:35 PM
146

“First we fuck, then I’ll ask you to be my gf if I actually like you. 🥰 either way, I’ll waste your time.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 01:05 AM
164

I have a little screenshot gallery of my OLD hall of shame and there’s one hinge profile that answers the prompt “swipe right if...” with: “you’re trying to have fun and not take things too seriously. But still open to more serious connections.” lol. It’s my favorite.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 11:26 PM
8

LOL I know what you mean. Much love!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 02:20 AM
16

One sentence answer: LVM hate boundaries. Privacy is a big boundary. It's very easy to push the envelope with privacy too, even if you don't have gossipy friends. *makes tinder reference* "oh aren't you on tinder?" "Isn't [male friend name] your boyfriend? I always see you two together." "I saw you [blah blah-ing] on your IG story! Were you by yourself?" These are such benign little chit-chat questions, so easy to slip into conversation, but they put you on the spot to reveal personal stuff abou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 02:04 AM
33

Oh my god. I gasped when I read the part where he ambushed you with a proposal. I am so, so, so happy for you making the most of a 2020 to grow and make a decision that was true to you. You are a queen and I am so excited for your 2021.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:54 AM
10

Love hearing success stories where ladies feel valued and cherished <3 beautiful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:30 AM
14

thank you! that puts into words feelings and fears I used to experience. really appreciate it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:28 AM
22

Hi there. What you're describing is a real phenomenon. I don't know what it's called but I've experienced it myself. Abusers have an eye for women they can abuse. Please go to therapy and heal before you start dating again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:17 AM
14

This is so interesting. I've never heard of it before. Can you please explain what fawning is in response to a threat?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:15 AM
20

Nope. Nope. Nopenopenope. I am allergic to people with anger problems now. I have no angry people in my life anymore and I'll never have anyone like that in my life again. My relationship with my ex was like a prison sentence. He was mercurial and angry often, but explosively angry after a single drink. I'll never go back. Ladies, if you have angry people in your life, let them go. Everyday of your life free of anger is a day that you gift love and peace to yourself. I know that's not always pos…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:11 AM
34

The towellllllll ☠️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 11:46 PM
8

Thank you kindly! I’ve contemplated it but I think I need more time to reflect on what I’ve learned I therapy. If you want to learn more, I recommend YouTube videos by Pia Mellody titled “Self-Esteem” and “Facing Codependence Full Version” She is a treasure!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 04:41 AM
12

Thank you for your thoughtful reply!!! Thank you for standing up for supportive dialog.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 01:52 AM
14

I can type a whole essay in response to why this is wrong but all I’ll say is that if it was as easy as choosing happiness over suffering, codependency would not exist. Again, women die because of codependency.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 01:51 AM
86

I feel really compelled to comment this and if it gets me in hot water so be it. The work I've done in therapy to move on from my co-dependency has been a 100% reconstruction of my brain. I needed a professional to give me everything from the vocabulary, tools, literature, etc. to start. I have access to a therapist because I am a professional with health insurance, against all odds because I am a minority woman who should be impoverished/addicted to substances, in jail, or dead because of where…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 09:08 PM
21

Something that men taught me during my libfem days was how to treat them like this. And none of them liked it. Weird, right? :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 08:51 PM
23

I love the way you phrased this. It really is a predator/prey interaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 08:48 PM
14

Last year, I had a boyfriend who did many HV things. I had a major surgery scheduled, declined to be his girlfriend at first because I knew it was going to be hard to recover from, and he held my hands and looked into my eyes and said he wanted to be there for me. Amazing, beautiful, love, wow. To his credit, he showed up for my recovery. Did my groceries. Called a relative who is a doctor to give me advice. Scooped my cat's litter box. Held me every night. Pre-surgery, there were some LV behavi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/20 10:32 PM
8

I think LV/HV is not a good system to examine a man's behavior. Are there LV men who can act HV? Yes. In the LV/HV system, a man can "accrue" a number of HV behaviors and get mis-categorized as an HV man. "Do I feel safe in this relationship?" "Do I feel enriched by this relationship?" "Am I clear about this relationship?" Answering yes or no to those questions is how you should examine HOW YOU FEEL in a relationship. DO NOT EVER STOP ASKING YOURSELF THESE QUESTIONS. Do not waste energy being su…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/20 10:12 PM
103

Some men use the word “standards” when they should really say “I feel entitled to ride on the coattails of women who have their shit together” 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 03:40 AM
25

My favorite thing about FDS community is that it is inclusive of women *and* girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 11:56 PM
3

Omg I’m so grateful for your detailed description of owning it and your recommendations!! Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 06:39 AM
10

I was considering buying one but I only have one game in mind to play on it! What do you think so far?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 10:34 PM
16

Omg your username lmao!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 11:39 PM
34

Putting the “men” in mental gymnastics lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 10:48 PM
17

This is why I put all my “building” energy into the women in my life!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 02:58 AM
5

This is the composition of their OLD profiles: 1) a quote from The Office 2) “I like to pet dogs” 3) “I love tacos” 4) picture holding fish
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 10:33 PM
8

I haven’t spoken to my ex in months. He texted me the following this week: “Hey I just drove by your car parked outside of <bar in downtown> and I’ll be in the area for the next 5 minutes if you feel inclined to take a walk with me, just feel like checking in with you” The first thing I thought was “was he always this selfish but now I can see it?” I have grown so much since our breakup (which happened before quarantine). I’m not mad. I’m not sad. I’m grateful to myself for all the space I’ve ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 10:31 PM
77

Thank you for dropping the fucking mic. They know who they’re touching and why.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 10:27 PM
6

"it grosses me out to see people with gigantic bellies and their belly button sticking out. they have to pee all the time, have so much gas, heartburn, and they never stop talking about it." Isn't she talking about out of shape men lol?????
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 09:51 PM
6

The behaviors you described your friend doing tells me that your friend is very sick and needs help. Let's get away from discussing your friend. ​ Think about the peace and love in your life. The things that seem far away now - aren't they exciting? Isn't it wonderful to know that you are establishing a secure, meaningful future for yourself? While you don't know what lies on the other side of that (especially in this unpredictable time), I can assure you that you are taking steps to have a rich…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 11:05 PM
3

That really belongs on the wall of shame of online dating "dates" lol....congrats to you for your peace of mind too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 10:55 PM
35

Last week I downloaded Hinge and matched with a guy who immediately asked me out. I thought, awesome, someone who’s using this app seriously. After we set up a date & time, we got to chit chatting and he said something super condescending. I unmatched immediately and felt amazing. I spent zero energy trying to interpret what he said, being offended, etc just listened to my feelings and moved on. It’s taken me so much time to get here. There was a time in my life I didn’t even know this peace of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 07:00 PM
11

Yes yes yes! I can't even think of the last time I heard a boyfriend referred to as "spoiled"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 09:53 PM
8

Interesting, considering that men murder women that make them jealous and sometimes even the man who he was jealous over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 09:47 PM
6

When I was 21, I was in line for a bathroom at a bar in my college town. The men's bathroom had a line too. A guy (100% stranger) next to me made eye contact and said kinda quietly, "can you...tie my shoes?" It's a miracle they do anything for themselves. This text exchange reminds me of the bewilderment I felt in that moment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 09:34 PM
18

So he doesn't even recognize her humanity *and* he owns guns? Yeah, she needs advice to protect herself once she serves him divorce papers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 07:02 PM
163

The “I know I know” is so telling. It’s clear that this kid has gotten the message that “no” is negotiable. So sad that that gets internalized in children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/20 10:41 PM
5

They whine because they don’t know how to make a doctor’s appointment for themselves. 🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 09:08 PM
1

Oh my gosh :( that’s awful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 06:07 PM
2

That “fall back excuse” thing really stands out to me. Thanks so much for sharing. Did your Mr. Workaholic fade away eventually or did it end another way?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 05:44 AM
5

He does not own a biz. He works for a public institution early in the day and works a service job that with great tips in the afternoon/evening. In our few conversations, he seems to have a good balance of interests and discusses work a reasonable fraction of the time. Something I like that’s been a double edged sword is that he has a lot of friends and I do too...each of us have had friends “crash” the little time we’ve had together so far. Sigh. I think each of our friends are excited for us. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 05:42 AM
2

👏👏👏👏👏 hell!! yes!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 12:37 AM
3

Thank you for the reminder <3 I love the idea that interested men will find when/where/how to fit a woman in their life when they want her there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 09:57 PM
4

Thank you. That makes so much sense. I have been busy myself and not talked to other men but I want to change that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 09:48 PM
3

Thanks so much. I've reflected on how I've felt when I'm burnt out and I certainly have less patience and energy to invest in people around me. Everyone is different, of course, but it's a bad sign. It's too early to know his life circumstances but we are in our 20's so it doesn't seem like a wild life history is the case. When I asked him why he decided to get a second job, he said he started when he was furloughed for months due to COVID but he has since decided to keep it in case job security…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 08:33 PM
4

That's really disappointing, especially when it's about your birthday - a special occasion that's about you. A few months ago I cut a girlfriend out for a similar reason and I have not looked back. Her and I still keep in touch superficially via instagram. Congrats to you for recognizing a bad pattern and taking action to change the relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 06:44 PM
7

What are your thoughts on men that work a lot? I started dating a guy that works seven days a week (not WFH). On one hand, I'm very turned on by a man who can put his head down and work, but on the other hand, I'm wary of workaholics. Also could see him being hard to spend time with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 06:39 PM
1

If I ever have to text him about his breath, just put me in a rocket and send me to Mars pls
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 01:43 AM
1

I go to the next closest thing: pilates classes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 10:23 PM
1

Thank you. 🙏 it was a first date and a few bump ins after where his face lit up when he saw me. I totally did not see through what I perceived as sweetness. 🤷‍♀️ dudes are lame.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 01:48 AM
1

Thank you. That’s a great way to think about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 12:39 AM
3

Thank you. I’m not caught up in the guy as much. I’m more confused about why my bullshit detector, which I thought was top notch, failed me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 01:54 PM
7

I met a guy in person and got ghosted by him not long after our first date. To be clear, no sex happened. I’m beating myself up for being surprised by this. What did I miss and how do I never get surprised by this again? Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 06:32 AM
2

He actually typed this out and is still nowhere near reflecting on why women would prefer vibrators to men. Lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 09:18 PM
18

Ohh yes I remember that! That same author advocates for women to do plenty of submissive shit in relationships/career/life. Garbage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 09:00 PM
9

Wahhh, you want to be treated with dignity and that’s too much to ask of me, wahhh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 08:53 PM
9

😂 I’m not sure how active the mods are about changing flair. We’ll see!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 08:52 PM
99

Isn’t it startling that society sees heartlessness in our own self-love?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 05:19 PM
2

This comment dropped the mic 🎤 💥
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 09:37 PM
10

He’s being accusatory, making hateful generalizations about women, making assumptions about divorce (which is legally sensitive and complicated)...and all you did was point out that he was doing all of the above. 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:04 PM
13

Men aren’t responsible for their own behaviors, duh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:00 PM
14

You were civil af. His post was not. Fuck those mods.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 07:59 PM
14

Also...a bed frame. Omg.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 04:09 AM
1

So did we graduate from cat ladies to dogpill?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 09:47 PM
11

Always remember that they have no problem being rude to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:09 PM
101

Also, some discomfort and pain happens even if you’re used to it. That even occasionally happens with vaginal sex. Ridiculous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:04 PM
21

I really would love to see men kicking and screaming about giving me oral sex as much as they bleat about putting their dicks in my ass. Sigh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:03 PM
62

You know who would say “precious bits”? A man writing this lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 07:53 PM
5

“I gave her some time to recover (way more than when we had our first kid) ...” I want to bleach my eyes now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:47 PM
76

Oh my god yesss please with a bow on it too!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 08:36 PM
6

Wait, drinking water? I’ve officially heard it all lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 07:10 PM
16

Hahaha I found this exact quality in a Scorpio. Male water signs, man...🙅‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 05:40 AM
112

Yep. It’s not about the makeup. It’s always something: pumpkin spice, rom coms, high pitched voices, the color pink, etc. things associated with women get hated on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 05:37 AM
22

Well sometimes they also idolize Elon Musk which is super original
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 02:25 AM
3

I think they chase the novelty because it gives them a high. They don’t love people, they love that NRE feeling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 06:14 PM
1

Thank you so much!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 07:20 PM
8

Yesss, they like being swept up in the feeling of meeting someone new and liking them. As soon as that wears off, they’re out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:46 PM
25

Isn’t it interesting how poly is never discussed that way? 😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:45 PM
16

I’m in the Seattle-Portland area so this comes up often for me. I thought I knew one poly “triad” that actually made it work (1 man married to 1 woman, introduced 3rd woman later), lived under the same roof, and had three incomes to pay bills and take trips. I was like hm, that’s kinda smart. Suddenly, I come to find that the 3rd woman is out of the picture and the married couple won’t even acknowledge she ever happened. They’re monogamous only as far as I know now. Also the wife is on very spec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:42 PM
15

Oh god my stomach just sank like a cold stone. I’m so sorry for your loss and for your friend and her family.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 06:16 PM
29

I want to laugh at this but the last time I talked to one of my girlfriends, we had this exact convo and it broke my heart for her. Our entire friend group has cut her and her bf out because we can’t stand his toxicity toward her. Fuck how normal this shit is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:22 PM
25

Sex without hygiene or safety? Wow, where do I sign up? Lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 08:45 AM
49

Also, your reward as a poly woman is what? Access to other shitty men in the poly community? Cool.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 07:41 AM
1

🔥🔥🔥🔥 shots fired.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 09:21 PM
2

The disgustingly long beard 😂 I can see those long face pubes in my mind’s eye.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:52 PM
11

A glorious starfish 🤣 I’m on a road trip with friends, coffee, and a croissant!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:02 PM
1

As many comments have said here, please give yourself the gift of therapy and self-compassion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 07:25 PM
11

Wow, what a deal. Instead of being single or finding the perfect man, we can deal with many crappy men! Lol. Yes, I’m finding that out quickly. Sigh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 07:22 PM
11

You don’t have to explain yourself if you don’t want to. It seems that you want to, so taking from the last paragraph of your post: “I’ve been reflecting on what I want out of a life partnership and I realized that our relationship isn’t on that level. I’m ending our relationship because that is what is best for me.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 07:02 PM
3

I have worked on this really hard in therapy. Basically, I was putting a lot of energy into preventing the boat from being rocked because these conversations made me feel threatened. Fear scrambles your brain. I worked on self-confidence, boundary setting, practicing little phrases like “what do you mean by that?” or conversation closers like pretending to be distracted, suddenly having to go pee, etc at first. Now, a year later, I have a sense that the conversation is not going in a good direct…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:38 PM
9

Yes, I happened to be getting a drink on the floor that the meetup was on 🤦‍♀️ Veeeery out of shape, not groomed, not charming, etc is how I would describe the people I saw at that meetup. I remember overhearing a man who gushed about taking trips to Thailand often and I couldn’t help but think of him as one of those sex tourists that seeks underage girls. At the time I thought it was a mean thing to think about a stranger but I’ve learned to trust my intuition.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:31 PM
9

Notice that it never is the other way around of men being ok with their wife seeing other men to keep her happy 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:27 PM
3

I’m in the area and I think my eyes just fell out of my head reading this. Omg.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:26 PM
9

One time many years ago, a restaurant/bar in my area was hosting a “poly meetup” that I walked in on. Of the ~20 people there, three were not obese. I found out about this because a dirty looking couple who had been at the river all day (so muddy feet, wet clothes, etc) showed up, struck up a convo with me, and explained this all to me before inviting me home with them lol omg.....some people can’t even be bothered to shower before trying to have sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:20 PM
25

I’m in the area too and I interpret poly as 1) an excuse for men to be low effort since they want to have interactions at their own convenience 2) men who enjoy the feeling of “meeting new people” and “falling in love” but don’t want to invest in it. I should add that I don’t actually believe that there is such a thing as polyamorous people. 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:15 PM
22

Don’t shoot the messenger. Your therapist is providing a correct assessment of many men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:00 PM
12

To be clear, are you asking for what to say when you break up with him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:53 PM
1

I ride motorcycles and I begggg you to not be a young man’s passenger. No matter their skill level, they overwhelmingly have bad judgment. I would recommend removing the bit about motorcycles from your profile altogether. The fact that he wants a passenger he’s never met before in a situation with a lot of cornering on windy mountain roads (where weather is fickle!!) is the reddest flag.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 08:43 PM
1

I think it was here in FDS that someone posted a video about a YouTube PUA. This was his tag line, word for word, in his stupid OLD profiles. 🤣 this loser can’t even be original.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 08:35 PM
29

“Help me do my own emotional labor to get over you 💕 it won’t take long!” Head ass. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 10:38 PM
2

Girl, that’s better than a new car smell! Congrats on your budgeting success and I hope you’re okay after the accident!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 11:33 PM
38

Pretty much today years old. I thought narcissism was rare but it has sunk in for me in the last year that it’s not. Even when men aren’t pathologically evil, plenty of them have no problem acting entitled in ways that have endangered me ie) purposely sabotaging condoms. Edit: I am in my late 20’s.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 08:04 PM
4

I love that he opens by immediately projecting his own lie onto you. "Are you really 24? (cause I'm not) "
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 09:36 PM
11

Same but I've changed my mindset to be turned on by HVM and turned off by LVM. I can't get excited about a dusty dick, you know?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 08:07 AM
197

This is why a non-response is *chef's kiss*
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 09:33 PM
3

The super like is def the cherry on top here lmao.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 01:07 AM
30

Dad bod = I look like a peeled potato.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 12:59 AM
2

💖 hope you are having a beautiful Saturday!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 09:47 PM
6

"I won't date a man who isn't consistently growing" - I love this so much because the alternative is dating men who can't be bothered to grow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 09:30 PM
3

He made decisions to pit you two against each other, remember that. I understand how you feel. The best recommendation I can make is to turn to your hobbies, your loved ones, and put your energy into beautiful and enriching activities. You will grow and flourish and be better prepared to welcome into your life people who prioritize you. I hope you can direct your weekend into that. Big, big hugs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 09:20 PM
2

Congratulations on your growth!!!! I know it's painful at first but it's so rewarding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 08:15 PM
9

It's not dumb and you're not dumb. This is a clever excuse. If you were his priority, he would find a way to make it work. It has nothing to do with how valuable you are; it has everything to do with him taking you for granted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 06:44 AM
3

Oh god same. It’s a direct quote too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 01:14 AM
5

Lib fem is misogyny repackaged as feminism for young women. Behaving in ways that favor men is the new standard for “empowering.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 09:23 PM
11

Men go for the right time, not the right person. It has nothing to do with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 09:12 PM
183

He wants the benefit of your kindness, willingness to listen, patience, etc without committing. It means he’s wasting your time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 09:02 PM
8

“Not obsessed with her looks” vs. “likes to work out” though? Cool.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 08:31 PM
15

Omg finally, I feel like there's so much love out there for the ~aesthetic~ of Ed Sheeran and other men that look like pugs. Or worse, Pete Davidson......
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 11:51 PM
8

Since COVID started, I thought to myself that I just don't feel right dating now. I have family and friends in healthcare who expose themselves every time they go to work, so I figured it was a sensitivity about them. However, I've struggled throughout my life with "me" language as a consequence of co-dependency. I'm working SO HARD on this now in therapy and I finally realized why I don't feel right dating in a pandemic! The reason is that I am considerate and thoughtful of other people's healt…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:37 PM
29

the reason he deletes if you don't respond within a few hours is because the tagline of "only in town til friday" is permanently on his profile so the jig will be up otherwise ;)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:17 PM
5

Her profile pic goes with her comment lol! I realized as I was leveling up that men aren't impressive. I always expected men to groom well, have something clever or charming to say, make me feel secure, etc. and it turns out that they need a girlfriend to show them basic life skills. As for grooming, I can't even remember the last time I smelled a guy's cologne (pre-covid of course). Sigh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 08:55 PM
22

My time clubbing is actually a compilation of time spent swerving men who are trying to put their erection on my butt cheeks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:03 AM
12

I also buy myself flowers every time I go grocery shopping! 💖
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:00 AM
19

Yesssss!!!! The more the revulsion, the more the growth!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 11:46 PM
52

My favorite is when you just discontinue the convo altogether and they’re like, wow, what a rude bitch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 08:00 PM
2

Yes 💖 100% agree. The costs of casual sex are so much higher than any possible benefit, since men don’t know how to make women orgasm to begin with. The bar really is in hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 07:58 PM
21

Libfem is literally repackaging feminism into misogyny that can easily be internalized.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 06:02 PM
2

Lmaoooo but look at the comment under the red one in the last frame
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 06:07 AM
1

Haha I know! You're absolutely right, they love the chase and the power play of trying to make you emotionally available.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 08:42 PM
41

When I used to practice casual sex, nearly all men I saw as FWB hated being treated as such. If you treat them like a piece of meat, they follow you around like a puppy...that is, until you show interest and then they leave like it’s the scene of a crime. Men like this love power over you. They don’t love you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 07:23 PM
8

Isn’t it interesting how ZVM always think they’re the prize whereas HVM know that women are the prize?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:45 PM
2

He said what during what
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:41 PM
14

You are SO STRONG. I am so sorry you had to tolerate hateful and dismissive comments.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:36 PM
9

They put on a veneer that’s so fun! and so safe! to recruit naive women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:35 PM
23

I haven’t practiced BDSM but practiced libfem casual sex once upon a time and had to stop for this exact reason. I came to the dark conclusion that men listened to what my boundaries are just to push them, because they got off on making me uncomfortable. Also, I met ZERO men who didn’t bitch and moan about using a condom like obstinate children. I’ve had to do so much healing from the sexual abuse I subjected myself to because I was naive and told by libfem that it’s safe and fun and feminist. T…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:33 PM
10

This reminds me of that whiny post written by a loser that asked “why do FDS women block/ghost instead of helping men?!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:15 PM
6

And no back and forth fighting over texts! Block, block, block to conserve your energy and happiness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 09:05 PM
3

Girl, we have the same best friend 😔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 09:04 PM
7

I think you have to "hide your card" or delete the profile to remove yourself from the rotation of profiles to swipe through. Haven't used tinder in a while, not sure if hiding your card is still an option.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:00 AM
24

Please google your old phone number and make sure it’s not attached to info that could be used to identify you 🙏 glad you are safe and changed your number.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 08:07 PM
34

They feel entitled to abuse us but we won’t let them, so they’re angry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:58 PM
1

That’s strange! I see menus. Are you on mobile or a computer ?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 02:53 AM
3

The last bit got cut off, but that's exactly it! Priorities!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 12:28 AM
2

check the menu button
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 12:21 AM
4

this is beautiful <3 i showed the handbook to a friend and she thought it was interesting but wasn't ready to accept it and has continued behavior that holds her back from growth and healing. as so many other commenters have said, all women deserve to feel this way. this inspired me to send my friend more threads from the handbook and re-read it myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:48 PM
5

check out the menu section of the sub
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:43 PM
3

First they were manchildren, now they are kittens.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 12:57 AM
3

Oh wow. He actually highlights his loser ass profile at 3:02. The neg is strong with this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 12:52 AM
2

We're on the same wavelength! I've dramatically invested myself in my creative hobbies and trail walks too. :) And experimented with beauty products I've never tried before, like collagen eye patches. Non-creatively, I've spent time on YouTube learning about financial literacy, reading, doing cardio, and learning new ways to use my vibrator <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 12:32 AM
7

Thanks for talking about it. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t misinterpreted. Didn’t mean for this to get tense. Thanks for all you do to mod this sub which has meant soooo much to me since I joined it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 11:22 PM
10

That isn’t what I meant to say whatsoever. Please re-read my comment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 11:07 PM
23

In the same vein of content that's not in the spirit of the handbook, I'm a bit tired of most stuff on the "the audacity of scrotes" and "male depravity" flairs. It highlights the absolute worst of the worst behavior which is easy to spot/avoid for most women on this sub. I'd like to see less of this content (which is prominent when you sort by hot posts) and more queen stuff or at least discussions of red flags that are harder to spot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 10:08 PM
16

Codependency is absolutely conflated with womanhood, ladylike qualities, femininity, motherhood, everything! I’m not a parent and haven’t done research on raising healthy children, but through therapy I’ve done a ton of work on childhood trauma primarily around the concept of healing my inner child. That work largely revolves around cultivating an inner monologue that promotes self-worth. As a parent someday, I plan to ensure that my child(ren) always have a healthy sense of self-worth and respe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 11:50 PM
70

I agree. I see a lot of judgy language toward pickme women on this sub and around the internet. As I’ve done work in therapy, spent time talking to the women in my life, reflected on my own experiences, etc. I’ve realized that women are set up and scammed into pickme/co-dependent behaviors from the second we start internalizing social expectations as little girls. Every non-pickme woman has done revolutionary work within herself to get rid of her old programming and to get to queen status. I do …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 11:35 PM
2

Omg, when you put it like that it makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 07:11 PM
9

I remember reading this article :( can’t find it on a google search but the woman was so amazing. She started her own software biz that prioritized hiring WoC in tech.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 07:19 AM
26

Amazing that men would think that having an affair is in any way comparable with a medical procedure to end a pregnancy, of which both the pregnancy and the procedure are one of the most difficult things to put your body through as a woman. But okay.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 11:05 PM
28

The fact that LBJ is the cover for this story is mystifying. He's married to his high school sweetheart, is a wonderful father, and a huge BLM activist. I've been noticing lately how HVM are smeared whereas LVM are praised, their behavior excused/given the benefit of the doubt, normalized, etc......
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 06:13 PM
19

right? i interpret that as a call to action. "I'm lonely and I'm prompting you to fix this problem for me with your company, time, attention that I feel entitled to."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 06:08 PM
12

Queen Dorothy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 06:05 PM
23

Men go for the right time, not the right person. 🤯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 07:06 PM
1

thank you so much! I agree and I really appreciate you helping me put words to red flag feelings.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 01:19 AM
4

Question about a specific guy/situation: Before quarantine I was dating a guy with HV potential but has some growing up to do. We are in our 20's. We broke off our dating relationship mutually to work on ourselves. It's been months now and he's still holding on to our connection. He's been single throughout quarantine. I like him and our connection so I haven't fully moved on. This feels like hot-and-cold red flag behavior, but harder to spot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 08:42 PM
2

Lulus! Very affordable for the quality. https://www.lulus.com/searchresults?_csrf=xBNVSNUY--iUTooiSenc-VljBdxt9cbk13uI&q=button%20dress
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 08:29 PM
4

His brain: "Husky pic didn't work, will try inflammatory political comment to distract now"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 08:15 PM
1

Wow. Found this on the same website: https://solitarybeast.com/blog/whats-in-it-for-the-high-value-man Solitary Beast is keenly aware of what FDS is doing. Quote from the article: "Little girls play house with dolls and Easy Bake Ovens from the time they can walk. Planning a glamorous wedding, being a married woman and a mother is most women’s dream their entire lives. Even the strong, independent FDS Queens need a man to marry them to bring the dream into reality. As a man, you have the power t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:44 PM
2

also, sex in a car. lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:31 PM
2

Omg. "If" I like you. This reminds me of the choosingbeggars subreddit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:23 PM
7

that's so cute! thank you <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:16 PM
5

if i am ever asked a "body count" the conversation is over. first of all, "body count" sounds like you fucking murder people. second, the same insecure men that size up a woman's sexual history expect women to do in bed what they see on highly experienced porn stars do on pornhub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:11 PM
11

hmm...some men think because they exist, women owe them sex, emotional labor, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:06 PM
11

what do you put in your bio so it doesn't give the road map but still says enough about you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 07:02 PM
9

yikes at this meme
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 08:10 PM
16

Isn't it interesting how tons of women are raised this way but men are never raised to be grateful for women or be top notch providers and protectors? It's almost like...it's all a scam.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 08:08 PM
13

Yes yes yes. Men like this will be shit out of luck when women embrace their queen energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 07:59 PM
34

They always come back because it's 100% about controlling you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 07:48 PM
1

thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 05:20 AM
11

I would love for a man to call me uptight as if that’s an insult. Like, yes, I embrace being a huge uptight bitch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 07:36 PM
12

That’s still 25,000+ eggs. Lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 07:31 PM
1

May I ask how you fixed it? I have this too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 07:27 PM
3

Yes. I was 21 and he said “I’m just not sexually attracted to you” because I was too young and inexperienced. He was 10+ years older than me and a master of praising the same qualities in me that he would later go on hateful tirades about. Satan works hard but narcissists work harder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 07:24 PM
2

haha. he ends by saying sorry if you're in a relationship, as if the only reason you'd reject this is because you're not single. congrats to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 06:50 AM
1

this is KEY to being HVW in general, not in this situation: please educate yourself on co-dependency vs. healthy relationship behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 06:48 AM
1

ah yes. my ex had a difficult relationship with his mom because she physically abused him as a child. one time, my ex shushed his mom in front of me while watching TV. years later, he shushed me while watching football.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 06:37 AM
2

ironically, the only time i have ever seen this, it was a male driver. also, my low insurance rates say hi.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 06:23 AM
66

Interesting. When I've described men as weird and psycho, it's because they are stalkers, violent, creepy, etc. When this guy described the woman as psycho, he meant a woman that peacefully went on her way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 05:39 AM
2

You’re probably right but I shut down men really fast. If they come up to me in public (I’ve generally had this happen right outside of bars) I say “I’m busy” and I turn away with no mercy lol. No time to give a backhanded compliment 💯 Nasty and pushy men have been a thing all my life, unfortunately, so who knows if that’s related to PUA things.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 09:33 PM
3

This was harrowing to read. Thanks so much for sharing. I know about PUAs loosely but never took them seriously enough to research them. I don’t think I’ve ever had one approach me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 12:21 AM
2

can you elaborate on what you mean by pua preferring women with certain job titles?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 09:05 AM
15

Ironically, he only tweeted this because sexual assault is so ubiquitous in the first place
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 05:42 AM
8

Newt Gingrich has entered the chat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/20 08:13 AM
1

Oh my goodness, how precious!!! He must really love what he does if he hasn’t retired yet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 08:54 PM
1

😂 he sounds wonderful! Congrats on having a scrumptious therapist!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 08:53 PM
2

That is so sweet and serendipitous! How long have you seen him for?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 08:32 PM
2

So glad you have a great relationship with your therapist! I extensively researched therapists in my network. I picked a few to call and discuss their therapy style, learn a little bit about them personally, and ask if they pursued continuing education before ever going in. Edit: and it resulted in the perfect therapist for my needs <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 12:16 AM
26

I love thinking of George from Seinfeld when I read FDS! I also think of Jerry, since his trope is breaking up with great women for petty reasons. I am a huge Seinfeld fan, btw.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:06 PM
1

Thanks for that :) also, hedonism would totally look like me with a whole strawberry cheesecake to myself hehe
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 08:01 PM
1

That’s a very interesting interpretation of my decision. I don’t think my choice is about hedonism so much as practicing something I like with likeminded people, which are few and far between.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 06:27 PM
1

sigh. at least he got right that I'm not gonna make abuela look stupid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 08:59 AM
5

My family is also Hispanic - most def a cultural expectation of what role a woman should be performing, sigh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 08:50 AM
8

"I just want him to be happy" ... I like group sex a lot and have honestly come to a crossroads about it through FDS and personal growth. I've had such unpleasant encounters with women who aren't interested with men who are predatory *and* pushy toward their partners through this scene. I don't think it's realistic to practice my interest in group sex anymore because of the COUNTLESS people who are participating for the wrong reasons. This is one example of women participating for the wrong reas…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 08:42 AM
2

It’s difficult to interpret individual intentions but it is always safe to assume the worst and let someone’s behavior correct you if they have good intentions :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 01:13 AM
2

Sure, it’s feasible that that is the case. Vice-versa too (see threads about an emotional support ex). Yes, some guys think one-on-one time with you is likely to result in sex because it’s more intimate to have one-on-one time than group time. Guys that have a goal to get your sex, time, and/or money will act single-mindedly to get it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 12:16 PM
2

This is such an awesome question. I have boundaries on touch and personal space, I steer conversation away from sex if it’s too personal, I’m thoughtful about when/where I spend time with my male friends, don’t provide excessive emotional support...stuff like that. I’m sure there’s more that’s not coming to mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 12:05 PM
4

congrats on your awareness - now you can end it and put energy into yourself!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 07:22 AM
6

Ooof, I've never seen a more acute case of block & delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 07:17 AM
7

> "is into all my kinks but has none of her own, always ready for sex" really appreciate this. I had a long-term partner that praised me for my sexuality and sexual appetite, but when the rubber hit the road, he insulted/dismissed what I was interested in. For example, I asked him to do a certain sex act with me that 1) the few times we had done it, we both absolutely loved it and it was super intimate 2) he happily watched porn of that sex act. When it came to doing it with me, nope. Wouldn't d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:06 PM
1

Glad you got him out of your life :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 05:48 PM
4

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 05:48 AM
27

I almost had to stop at the top of your post. Can you imagine that there are actually men out there who think that helping you with an injury = quid pro quo? Women are just a means to an end for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 01:39 AM
2

😂 imo the most colorful flair(tm) on this subreddit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 03:22 AM
9

Ugh but congrats on him being your ex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 03:17 AM
34

I love that you called it deprogramming because it's literally like deleting a software that's been installed and updated over a lifetime. You are so awesome for doing a 180 by growing out of people pleasing and calling out men for being purposely obtuse. Don't stop at asking to put something up his ass. Ask him to make you cum and then take you to dinner after too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 10:13 PM
63

There aren't phrases to shame men for this behavior. The closest we have is "fuckboy"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 10:03 PM
66

I enjoy anal play and penetration with a lot of boundaries to ensure that it is enjoyable for me. I really appreciate that u/SpecificPatience8 said "they would never do the same for them" because it reminded me of a convo I had with a girlfriend who talked to me about anal sex with her boyfriend (who is her 1st and only sexual partner)...she said "I've done anal because, you know, you just have to let guys try that." Wtf? It's so easy to talk about women's bodies and experiences as something for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 09:42 PM
6

Another ditto on playing WoW. I've played on and off since high school and played again in the winter while recovering from a surgery that kept me off my feet. This expac isn't even fun. It's a big, tedious slog that has earned tons of criticism from the player base for being such a repetitive grind. So basically, the bf in the post is too addicted to a boring game to even notice that his gf showed up and she's wondering whether her frustration is justified...sigh. What other trash behavior does…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 08:51 PM
8

Thanks for bringing this up. I think I've heard about "lean in" only in passing. Here's an article that discusses a study about why "lean in" is problematic for anyone interested: https://www.businessinsider.com/facebook-sheryl-sandberg-lean-in-problematic-advice-2018-8
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 07:58 PM
5

It’s earning interest now 💖
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 07:23 AM
7

Thank you 💖 my financial security and peace of mind are a gift to myself everyday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 07:22 AM
29

After I left my ex who was an abusive narcissist, he told me that his colleagues asked him what happened and he said to them, “I don’t know.” Later, when it came time to split the finances, he said that “everyone” in his life told him that I shouldn’t get any money. Those things really stayed with me. When it came time to explain why I left him, he was a bumbling, sad puppy and my decision-making was mysterious. When it came time to give me back the money that I had invested in property with him…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 12:19 AM
11

I love your description of the dating scene! I’ve never heard it put like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 05:32 AM
1

Sometimes I read stuff on this sub that makes my heart feel bruised.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 04:49 AM
154

It appears that his anus is only 1 inch away from his brain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/20 08:58 AM
6

Yes, this. Such outrage when men are expected to step up to the plate and god forbid women ever get off the plate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/20 08:39 AM
6

Oof, I’ve never thought of that phrase that way. Thank you for pointing that out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/20 08:28 AM
13

“What is so weird is when people construct their entire identity around being kinky” My experience with these people is that they have a stick up their ass about how they are the only ones that “really” have fun in bed. To echo what you said, I’ve never met people so intolerant to any other kind of sexual lifestyle that’s not theirs as the BDSM community. Also feel like this is relevant to say: despite my tag, I have never practiced BDSM but I’ve met plenty of people who do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/20 08:18 AM
3

That’s terrible. I’m so sorry that that is your experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/20 04:36 AM
10

I have spent a lot of time in the lifestyle community because I’m non-monogamous. My experience is not “oh well” it’s: “I know it looks bad but you just haven’t tried it” “Giving up control is so fun” “But have you ever tried it?” Also, I’ve been sneered at because I’m not “kinky” enough lol. I’m boring for not wanting a can of whoop ass opened on me in bed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 07:38 PM
4

I think there’s a big variety in foot fetishes. I was with a guy who liked pedicures, high heels, and kissing/licking my feet in bed - all of which I was on board with. I’ve met other dudes that like to be stepped on, are interested in dirty feet only, etc. - none of which I’m on board with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 07:29 PM
9

There’s too much cognitive dissonance going on here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 07:22 PM
29

I’m pretty sure this woman and I have the same Grama.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 12:02 AM
12

You are so strong. Hugs. I hope you can find that forgiveness in yourself soon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 08:50 PM
5

You know when you wax your 🐱 and the pubes starts to grow back a few weeks later? Because that’s what his hair looks like in this pic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 05:23 AM
28

Someone else on this thread linked a pic of him at age 27 with barely any hair left. That was 20k well spent tbh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 05:35 PM
29

Oh man. I go to a college with a lot of engineers and they get stars in their eyes about Tesla and Elon Musk but they don’t know anything about Musk’s personal life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 05:30 PM
61

This is horrifying. That clearly indicates to me that he saw his first wife as an incubator to make what he wanted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 05:25 PM
11

this is so beautiful. thank you for sharing <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 12:48 AM
6

OP, your response to not answer that and cut him out of your life is perfect. Congrats to you for realizing you always need to trust your gut. I have many male friends. It's interesting to see how many of them change their behavior when I'm single vs. dating vs. exclusive with someone and, further, how they treat a guy I'm seeing if I'm not single. I'm bisexual and I don't fully trust how they'd treat a girl I'm dating if it got to the point where I'd introduce her. I don't have this concern wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 12:40 AM
1

SAYGRACE - Boys Ain't Shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 12:14 AM
3

No bed frame hahhhhh!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 09:04 PM
10

I'm trying not to laugh because I have a fask mask on and now the face mask is wrinkled
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 02:17 AM
1

Ok dark Caillou.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 11:51 PM
2

One of my favorite little blurbs that circulates as a meme every once in a while is "think men don't know about boundaries? tell him you want to put a finger up his butt. suddenly he will be very clear about boundaries." They know what boundaries are and they know what they're doing to yours!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:56 PM
2

I experience attraction toward a lot of men. Sometimes the attraction is electric, but that's a short-lived experience unless it's constantly maintained by both people. So really, I only have chemistry with men who treat me well. In my last short-term relationship, he started off strong but he gradually checked out and it literally made it impossible for me to look forward to seeing him, get wet in bed, etc. so we aren't together anymore. It's very important to experience attraction, passion, an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:41 PM
6

Also, the only reason women were ever housewives historically is because they had no job opportunities and there was no childcare...because that's how men constructed society. Now we live in a society where childcare is so expensive, a stay-at-home parent (often mom!) has no choice - again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:34 PM
18

Can we agree to cancel men who use the word "body count"? I can't hear that word without thinking of a body bag wtf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:32 PM
3

I'm so angry after reading this AITA post that I don't have words. He left her with two choices: be in agony or let the baby starve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:25 PM
1

This video is beyond precious! I can't bring myself to open the thread to see hate on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:12 PM
14

Something interesting about how he talks in your screenshot is that he says I/me way more than he talks about you. Also, no apology even though he acknowledges he didn't appreciate you (but leads with "let's talk" nevertheless!) I think they don't get over us because LVM can't get other women to put up with their shit or other women have treated them as poorly as they treat them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 10:08 PM
19

This was exactly my ex down to the cartoon guy's hair.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 09:27 PM
1

Yes yes yes!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 11:35 PM
3

Absolutely, it’s not love if it’s transactional!! Also we’re the same person! I’m also a face toucher and serial caresser 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 05:11 PM
3

Reading this hit me like a ton of bricks. Thank you for this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 06:11 AM
2

Also, the ED that made him cum like it was a race.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 06:02 AM
26

One of your first acts of self-love should be getting into therapy as soon as possible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 05:38 AM
28

Yes! The post is cut off but this language isn’t going in the direction of a dad that could have seen an ex as a son-in-law. It’s just criticizing his daughter. For what it’s worth, I met parents like this through work who adored their 18 y/o son who is literally Sid from Toy Story but hated their teen daughter, calling her vain and high maintenance and shit talking her at every opportunity. I never met the daughter but spent time around their son who followed me around, found all my social medi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 05:32 AM
2

“I love this girl. I get to be her everyday.” 😭 I love this!! You get to be a queen every single day. 💖
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 05:13 AM
25

I’m really mystified by the normalization of incest porn in particular. I think it’s because it’s the last taboo left.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 05:04 AM
3

I listened to a podcast on love languages once and it explained that the guy who came up with the idea (just one guy - most modern ideas in science are by several collaborators), named Gary Chapman, has ridden that one trick pony since the early 90 and is also a Baptist minister. Imo this limits the scope of the relationship psychology he’s able to interpret, research, or is willing to read about because Baptists don’t even think dancing is ok. This is speculation on my part, ofc. With that said…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:54 AM
36

If physical touch is really their love language, why aren’t they jumping to give their woman a back or foot rub? 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:45 AM
12

I was reading on boundaries once and found a really nice line that said, “boundaries are how you teach other people to access you.” That made so much sense because LVM get mad at boundaries because they want to access you however they see fit; HVM love learning about you, including your boundaries, so they can interact with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:32 AM
2

Yes! It’s a very niche thing for men to be the masochists and even then, it’s at their request and sometimes with that gender play/misogyny aspect. Sigh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:23 AM
19

I really like pointing out a few key things about popular BDSM practices: 1) the women are overwhelmingly the subjects of bondage, domination, sadism, and are the masochists 2) saying it again for those in the back: it’s rarely the men getting slapped, choked, spit on, tied up, etc by women. If it’s so great, why don’t men want it done to them? 😒 3) BDSM is billed as “about power play” but it’s unilaterally practiced as...women give up control, men do not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 08:41 PM
3

Aw, reading this here made me sad. There are many reasons to get therapy and you don’t have to have something “wrong with you” for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 08:30 PM
1

Hi there, I think it’s amazing that you’re investing in yourself by spending time on this sub at the age of 18. I’ve spent the last few months counseling my 28 y/o friend on a guy that won’t text her back come hell or high water. You’re not going to be like that in 10 years. I am also 28 and wish I had your foresight at 18. You’re amazing. I hope you make healthy decisions about the guy you’re texting now, whatever that may be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 09:30 PM
1

I stayed in this exact relationship. He told me this when I was 21 and he was in his mid-30’s and never apologized. Came so close to ending my life but chose to break up instead. There’s no fixing this because there’s nothing to fix: these men want control, not a woman by their side that they’re attracted to, share love with, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 09:19 PM
2

They date for control, not attraction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 09:13 PM
1

“Let’s hangout” - there’s a...global pandemic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 08:39 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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