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whatamoniker1 Archive

View 10 posts and 176 comments by whatamoniker1 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

I've gone through the same experience. Totally normal.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 05:53 PM
3

Bro I'm sorry you're going through this. I went through something similar after 17 years. It hurts like nothing else and you will have scars. But do not move out. DO NOT move out. She should go move in with her affair partner. Just stay the course, you will be ok. I promise you will be ok.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 01:07 AM
1

I read that in Wayne's voice from Wayne's world haha
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 02:41 PM
1

Hey brotha, just checkin back in, hope all is well with you, and your dick perpetually wet with sweet sweet poon
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 09:43 AM
1

Dont listen to the nay-sayers bro. They're jealous they're not smashing like the rest of us in here
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/23 03:44 AM
1

Agreed. I've been reiterating that very same thing to myself the last few days. I'm done living this way. It's time for me to live my life the way I want, with MY kids. She can go pound sand
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 06:14 PM
43

Exactly this, my ex is kinda doing the same shit. Shes crying about how hard life is for her now, like I'm gonna save a hoe AGAIN
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 03:59 PM
2

Yeah, I gotta get some distance between us. When shes here, it's weird, almost like nothing has changed so that makes it harder to separate from her
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 01:28 AM
2

Thanks bro, I appreciate your input
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 01:26 AM
1

I've let her control me for 17 years, I'm trying to unravel shit. It's like I dont know what's up or down amymore
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 12:41 AM
1

I dont fuck her. I also got checked out at the VA as soon as I found out about her fucking someone else. I learned that some point I was exposed to hepB, but I don't have it and the doc says if I did end up getting it, my immune system would be able to combat it. Not sure if I was exposed via her extracurricular activities or not, but it's an interesting find nonetheless...
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 12:00 AM
2

Brother, thank you so much for your input. I truly appreciate it
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 11:45 PM
1

I'm going to make strides to growing a spine. Thank you for your feedback
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 06:42 PM
2

I'm about an hour and a half into the audiobook of nmmng right now. Holy shit, so much hits home. I've read it before, but I dont remember it being so applicable to me as it is now.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 05:38 PM
0

My mother suggested I get a TRO because of how she emotionally abuses me and the kids. I dont think I could do that to someone though. Even if they are a real piece of work
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 05:20 PM
1

I agree, totally got cucked. Its embarrassing and shameful for me. I dont think hes an alpha, though. More like one of those snakes who sweet talks and "listens" to her while trying to swoop in. I often ask why I let myself get used like this. I wish I knew the answers
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 05:16 PM
1

The house was inherited from my grandparents, my name is on the title. Yeah I do need to grow a pair and put this bitch in her place.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 05:13 PM
2

Excellent point
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 08:36 AM
3

Getting a divorce
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 08:30 AM
2

She does do this in front of the kids. Just yesterday there were several instances, but one example was one of my kids found a ring in my truck. The ex freaked out on me about it. I've never seen this ring before, mind you. She was livid, yet shes the one with a fucking BF. But then my oldest kid said it was hers and shes been looking for it. Ex was still mad about it for some reason, even after my daughter said it was hers immediately. This is just one of many, many examples... Yeah, I mean I c…
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 11:22 PM
3

I have to, you're right. Thanks
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 11:17 PM
3

That's ideal, yeah. Her excuse is she cant afford one right now. I even offered to pay the deposit just to get her out 100% of the time, but she backed out last minute.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 11:16 PM
2

Thank you brother
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 10:10 PM
2

Thank you so much for this. Your story about mental gymnastics is so familiar to me.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 10:09 PM
1

Thank you
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 10:06 PM
2

Thank you so much for this. I've read nmmng years ago, but obviously it didnt stick. I'll give it another go and check out the other one you suggested. Thanks again
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:53 PM
3

Thanks brother, I really appreciate it
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:25 PM
3

Thank you, yes I am talking to a therapist at the VA. He says the same thing you just said, she likes to break my boundaries. But she simultaneously sets up those same boundaries on me in an ironic hypocritical way. One Example: she can have male friends, but I cant have female friends
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:25 PM
1

That's what I need to hear though. I've been a damn doormat my whole marriage. You dont even know how bad it is, man. Cringeworthy shit... I need a kick in the ass by other men who know better
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:22 PM
4

Yeah, when shes not around, my kids and I feel so much peace
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:21 PM
4

No you're right, I suck at boundaries. I'm trying to think of better ways that dont involve the nuclear meltdown on her end, but like my buddy told me today, I just need to do set my foot down and weather the storm.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:20 PM
8

Thank you, you're absolutely right. A good friend of mine says I'm conditioned, and that I need to change my thinking. I've got a lot of work to do. I need to stand up for myself, you're spot on. Thanks again
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:19 PM
5

Thank you for this
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 08:07 PM
0

No we dont have a decree, it's just a 50/50 that we agreed upon. Weve started dividing assets but shes still without her own place. I offered to pay her apartment deposit so she could get out of my place 100%, but she still cant adult enough to make it happen.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 05:13 PM
14

Yeah I pretty much have no self worth, you're right
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 05:02 PM
10

This is exactly what I need to hear. How a normal man should respond. I dont know what I'm supposed to do really, I just assumed this was ok for now. And you're right, it was her running it, this was her idea. I dont know how to respond, and to be honest, I'm terrified of this woman.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 04:27 PM
17

Yeah that's true, you're right
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 04:22 PM
2

You're right about that. I told her, you mean theres consequences for our actions?
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 04:00 PM
3

Mine has been crying about how hard life is out there in the real world. She cries about money, She cries about missing her home, her stuff, the kids, but not once did she cry about missing me. She didnt cry about the affair she had and how she wrecked everything for everyone. Nope. Just what I provided and how I had to deal with the real world while she cruised along in SAHM land
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 03:14 PM
4

Facts. My exwifes mom was a lying cheating hypochondriac that was always seeking attention. My ex is exactly like her. Destroying families for new dick. They're starting to look very similar too, its uncanny
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 02:36 PM
3

Hooking up helped me move on. You know the old saying, the best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody. Or something like that. Just dont get into a relationship or let them control you in any way whatsoever. You're a man, go forth, and smash
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 01:44 PM
8

My ex was a SAHM while i brought in 6 figures and still did a lot of the chores and cooking. Not to mention all the vehicle and home repairs, and taking care of the kids. Yet she was "a prisoner in her own home", and I did "nothing to help her". Her affair partner is much uglier than me, but he owns a catering business and she has a boner for kitchen work. So long as it's not the kitchen in the home, I guess...
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 09:11 PM
3

Excellent point.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 10:37 PM
2

Yeah, marriage is a bum deal. You have to have unbelievable amounts of frame for that shit show
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 06:02 PM
7

And why is SHE on tinder? You both just playing the game, and done nothing wrong. Keep that chin up, and wade deep into that pussy pool
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 04:47 AM
0

It is, but luckily theres still a good chunk of women who arent feminists and would love a masculine, traditional man
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 03:49 AM
4

Why did this get downvoted? Holy shit, you poor guy, that's wild af. Although, I bet its reassuring to know that you're WAY more of a man than that dingus. Good riddance to the ex, and congrats on your deal
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/23 03:49 PM
3

I bet women think they'll just have some other swinging dick pay their bills. That's how women work. No need for a real job, they gots a mans to pay her way
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/23 01:51 PM
3

Female with penis= extra delusional
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/23 01:45 PM
45

This right here brother. Please dont choose a permanent solution for a temporary problem. We are all here for you. DM any one of us in this forum. We love you dude
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/23 06:55 AM
5

Slow clap for you, my brother
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/23 05:12 PM
1

Same bro, I went into the military at 18, got married at 20
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/23 04:09 PM
6

As soon as I can build my wealth back up, I'm going to go mid-century modern/swanky. Ex hated that style, but I love it
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/23 04:05 PM
4

Proud of you brother. Keep up the great work and become an inspiration to the rest of us here
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 09:46 PM
1

Good stuff
/r/seduction18/04/23 02:28 PM
5

You got this, bro. Remember, shes just some woman. Nothing special, theres a million of em. Relax, enjoy yourself, smile. You're the prize, and if she plays her cards right, you'll show her a great time
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 01:51 PM
2

This reason alone indirectly made my imdb rating go up a little higher
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/23 01:44 PM
1

I know, i wish I wouldve recognized it. "More red flags than a chinese parade". Got married at 20 like an idiot and had no idea of what a relationship is/should be.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 03:06 PM
3

Theres an old joke that goes something to the effect of: You've heard of foods that increase a womans sex drive, but theres one food that kills it completely. Wedding cake.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 02:43 PM
4

Mine threw a fit when I suggested it. And like a chump, I appeased her by not getting one...
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/23 06:30 PM
3

Trying to sell my houseboat as we speak for that very reason. Well, and the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/23 06:27 PM
10

Oh no no, that wasnt to say all you have to do is dance. You still have to be witty, a little mysterious, get them to talk about themselves and ask polarizing questions. You still have to game, but you at least get your foot in the door with that bullshit two step.
/r/seduction02/04/23 05:14 PM
14

Consider yourself polarized, my friend
/r/seduction02/04/23 04:45 PM
47

This right here. Dancing, for whatever reason, is like a magic bullet. Most guys dont do it, so the ratio is in our favor. And good news, you don't even have to be good at it. Just a simple two step move and you'll have someone really interested. It's worked every time for me
/r/seduction02/04/23 04:43 PM
50

That's your opinion
/r/seduction02/04/23 04:40 PM
1

Is your firm hiring? I'm looking for something with high physical risk I cant talk about. For a little while at least
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 08:43 PM
1

This reads like my story too
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 02:01 PM
1

Should you file one if she is verbally and emotionally abusive, but not physically abusive?
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 02:00 PM
2

I remember asking an old man at the golf course one day that if he could go back in time and tell his younger self something, what would it be. Wanna guess what he said? "I'd do it all alone this time. No marriage." He was recently divorced at the time too
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 01:44 PM
2

Soft, then hard, then soft again
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 01:41 PM
5

Mine tells me, "you're still my best friend!" Damn girl, wouldnt wanna see how you treat enemies in that case...
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 02:42 PM
3

My friend and his ex decided to do CS outside of the system. The CS lady asked to speak to the exwife privately. She left it on speaker and my boy listened the whole time. The CS lady straight up said, "are you sure? Because I think we can get more money outta this guy." Dude, the system is so damn corrupt. Keep fighting
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/23 02:43 PM
20

Well said, friend I sometimes remind myself that I'm just some dude on a giant rock that's flying a million miles an hour around a nuclear ball of fire in a vast empty black void. And then things dont seem so important or hurtful.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/23 10:01 PM
2

Yeah it kinda blew me away. But she cheated on me before, made it seem like my fault, made all these promises to be a better wife, etc. And of course, she did it again. It's TRUE what they say, once a cheater, always a cheater. Learned my lesson the hard way
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/23 08:37 PM
2

Dont get her a gift. Just say happy birthday, and maybe help the kids if they want to get her something/make her dinner. For example, my ex was cheating on me, so I kicked her out, and it was a week before my bday. She went to the store and bought the shit my son wanted make me for dinner, and she left us alone so he can make me dinner and me and the kids ate in peace.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/23 04:44 PM
38

Sometimes it's just anxiety getting in the way. It's ok, and everything will be alright. Dont beat yourself up, my man.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 04:58 PM
1

Maybe refi for a smaller cash out amount, like only take out an additional 20k or whatever, and give her all of that. That would keep your mortgage lower than a full cash out. Not ideal, but what other options do you have? A heloc? That's even more expensive, and she would still be on the mortgage, just not the deed.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 04:35 PM
12

Good for you, keep going to that pub. Its your fucking pub. Let her get all wet for you again, that will be her purgatory. Forever lusting for what she once had but threw away, and now shes stuck with someone who obviously is below you in social hierarchy. Just dont let her weasle her way back into your awesome life. Keep that chin high, my dude
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/23 11:26 PM
5

Cool cool cool
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/23 05:38 PM
3

You gotta share your experiences with the rest if the class
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/23 05:36 PM
2

Ok, now you have to give us a field report
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/23 05:31 PM
8

Please please please, dont use a permanent solution for a temporary problem! It's dark right now, and things are tough. But so are you. You will make it through this! If you're going through hell, keep going
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/23 06:41 PM
5

Very insightful, great work. Keep up the momentum and come back with more knowledge to share with us all
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/23 04:40 AM
8

Heres a solution to that problem, and it may be a crazy idea but... DONT GET MARRIED AGAIN Did you not learn the first time?
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/23 02:24 PM
2

When you take your trash out to the curb, do you go back and root through it? Let these sleeping dogs lie, and move on with your new life. Build a new life. Become the you that you've always wanted to be
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/23 02:10 PM
14

Yeah, I chatted up this 40yo woman at the bar. She didnt look 40, she looked 30. Talked as we danced and grinded on each other. Foind out she split with her man. Then she told me she was "poly" and I was like, yup that's why hes gone. Anywho, I left her at the bar and went gome alone. Got her number jic but yeah women are nuts dude
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/23 02:31 PM
2

Yeah you're right, you gotta take time to heal and work on yourself. Trying to hookup is like playing with fire. You find something slightly better than what you know, and all the sudden you're "in love". Gotta remember that's just the novelty of it all. Keeping a dash of bitter hatred in your heart is a good start. At least in the beginning. It keeps you in check so you dont go falling for some dumbass broad who doesnt deserve you, other than for a lay. The best thing for him is to find out why…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/23 02:23 PM
1

The dudes I mentioned were like bar scene mentors. They provided tips and advice. I see how that could be confusing as I didnt provide much context on them other than miyagi reference. The pussy being thrown was not boypussy, I was talking about the women in the place
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/23 04:59 AM
4

Excellent story, well said!
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/23 01:24 AM
3

Best way to get there is to just force yourself to start somewhere. Itll be awkward, uncomfortable, and at times you'll want to just give up on everything. You're spot on with "me time". Make sure you treat yourself well. You're the only person you have to live with, so you should love yourself. Remember, if you're going through hell, keep going. I think that was Winston Churchill that said that, and I think it applies to a lot of us here Good luck to you, friend
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 08:16 PM
3

I would agree. It exacerbates the narcissism program running in the background of all of us. One amateur photo and the external validation comes flooding in, like a dopamine river. Western women wrecked themselves with their "empowerment"
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 08:09 PM
2

Gotta try the karaoke scene next weekend then!
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 06:07 PM
4

Yeah, you cant info dump, they couldn't give two shits about your story. Most women are full of themselves so all they wanna talk about is themselves. I'll add this, though: Bonus points if you tease them about something. Now they have to work to prove you wrong, or work harder for your attention. Example of this: I made fun of this womans fake eyelashes (in a playful way, not mean spirited), and when she asked what I thought she did for a living, I responded with "only fans". I dont know why bu…
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 06:06 PM
1

Learn from your mistake and dont LTR, dont move any women in, definitely dont remarry
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/23 03:02 PM
1

The fighting wasnt in front of the kids. she left a note for them saying shed be back in the am. She didn't come back until the afternoon. They asked where mom was, so I let them know she was at her boyfriend's, and we are not going to be together any longer.
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/23 02:18 PM
6

Yep. She really went there, and tried to put it on me like she was doing me a favor. Sick. Wow, your ex sounds like a gem. Sorry you had to go thru all of that my brother
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 02:59 PM
14

Then here's an upvote!
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 11:09 PM
3

Definitely learned a lesson
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 07:55 PM
2

Maybe. I'm a disabled vet too, and my therapist says I already have depression and anxiety
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 05:11 PM
2

I did, I said i was talking about my stepdad bc I'm getting divorced and need a place to stay that has room for my kids, and he moved some other people in, which is true. The ballbuster said, "well that's sounds unfortunate for you, doesnt it?"
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 03:49 PM
1

Yeah I've already got some jobs lined up since my customers and competitors heard (word travels fast) but I am also taking the responsibility. Like I said, yes it's my fault. I did lie to preserve my job, but who hasn't? I told my guys to learn from my mistakes, so I hope they do Yep I banged some coworkers, and now I have more time to do so.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 04:22 AM
1

Will do bro. Kind of comical in a sense, like holy shit what else?
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 04:17 AM
2

Yeah. Exactly this. I just hope the fiery trainwreck I'm becoming burns bright enough to light my way
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 03:40 AM
1

Yes I do mean black, but green vs negative reads easier for most who dont really care much about accounting. I've also increased profits on change orders, direct business, handling, restocking fees, and "other charges" which usually is wire cuts or minimum order fees.and decreased costs on warehousing fees, utilities, material costs, and office supplies. My percentage of wage is 43% and my cost of goods is about 60% below my topline sales. Should I go over the entire P&L, or is the big picture o…
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 03:19 AM
2

Before this, my attorney said if I took a lower paying role, the courts would argue that I used to make 6 and can do so again, and therefore require me to pay the higher alimony. I could still be on the hook for a shit ton
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 02:24 AM
-2

Actually this duo has been after me for a while. After my assistant and after a few others withing the company (other branches). Has nothing to do with performance or sales. My branch is number 1 in all of the above, but I dont kiss their asses and stand up for myself when they micromanage me, or mess with my employees paychecks and timecards. They actually shouldnt have reached the positions they're in, it's a lot to explain, but is a "not what you know but who you know" situation.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 02:09 AM
2

It's all good brother, you're right where you're supposed to be. Dont look back on should've could've wouldves.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 02:52 PM
4

Yup this right here. Women are never single. And aside from abuse, or something like that, they dont leave men unless theres another man waiting to catch them when they jump.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 02:48 PM
12

All of this, dude. It's time to unplug from the blue pill matrix and see the reality
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 02:11 AM
1

My friend, that's not a good quality of living. Have you thought everything through?
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 09:54 PM
3

Just a heads up, 50-60k in San Diego ain't shit. If you take the job, you better ask for way more
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 09:35 PM
1

Currently cohabitating with one. Sone days are very difficult
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 08:55 PM
1

Remember, tough times make great men. When you come out on the other side, you'll be that much better for it. If you want to, anyways. It's up to you and only you now
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 06:15 PM
1

I'm in the same boat my friend. Its confusing to say the least. Stay the course, and dont let her mindfuck you. Remember all the terrible times and bullshit she put you through, and then imagine life where you dont have to worry about her being around and controlling you anymore. Breathe, practice gratitude, and try to fuck sumpin'
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 02:48 PM
15

Grandparents rights arent real. Its bullshit in-laws say to scare/guilt you into letting them control your life of parenting.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 02:42 PM
1

Yeah dude when you said it, I was like, weird I just said the same thing. Same brain waves. I knew I liked your style, man!
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 03:10 AM
3

It's honestly kind of amazing how you realize so much after unplugging, and how easy things can be
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 11:36 PM
11

I'm sorry you're going thru it, but you know that old churchill quote, "if you're going through hell, keep going". Sounds like you're doing just that, congrats on the 10% and working towards an optimal you. Keep that head up bro, you got this shit
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 09:07 PM
2

Yeah and the kids love to build em. It's good memory making time, and feeding everyone. Perfect combo
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 09:04 PM
4

Update: Ex wants to discuss the subject but hasn't yet. Instead shes saying things like, "dont look too far into this, but I woke at at 3am and when I realized you weren't here, I was afraid. I thought you might be in a ditch somewhere. I wanted to call you, but it's none of my business." And then walk away. Fine with me, I'm not gonna kiss and tell
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 08:59 PM
3

I know it sounds silly, especially since she cheated on me before, manipulated me, and is leaving to Las Vegas the day after xmas with her boss, his wife, and their 21 year old son. But I cant just shut it off, it's going to take time and getting accustomed to wading back into the pussy pool, especially after 16 years So my plan is to keep smashing, until I no longer feel guilty about it
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 08:54 PM
1

This is absolutely the way
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 07:02 PM
5

Idk, I just have this little tugging feeling that it was wrong of me. But then again, how many opportunities like that am I gonna have? Especially coming out of marriage where she didnt want me like these two women did.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 03:19 PM
6

As long as we dont lock eyes haha
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 03:17 PM
6

Same here man, I'm just now coming out of the fog of this all
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 12:23 AM
7

Can confirm. If I ever complained about anything she would yell, "theres the door!" And I would sheepishly pout to myself. One day I said fine, I'm gonna use it and the look in her eyes was like sheer terror
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 12:22 AM
2

Wow dude I love this. You're my fucking hero right now and im going to take several pages from your playbook
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 12:20 AM
2

Weird right? Like now that its over, shes cordial and nice? Kudos to you bro, keep that chin up and focus on your mission in life, whatever it may be
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 12:38 AM
12

What if the roles were reversed? Would she get a job so you dont have to pay?
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 12:28 AM
2

DM me any time you need to vent/talk. I get it bro
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 05:07 AM
2

This right here
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 02:23 PM
2

I gave my cheater a second chance and all it has done was build up more resent and anxiety
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 02:19 PM
1

Get a consultation with the best/most ferocious attorneys in town. That way, she cant use any of them due to conflict of interest. If you hire one of those sharks, she will be stuck with a cut rate lawyer and your chances get better
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 02:17 PM
2

Get busy focusing on you and improving yourself. You will be far too distracted to worry about her after a while
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 02:12 PM
2

Thanks for this
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 02:55 PM
3

I had a friend get consultations from all the highest rated lawyers in town. When his wife tried to talk with them, they turned her away due to conflict of interest. Could be a solid method
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 02:50 PM
4

My mother did this to my grandparents and her husband. Super shady. Best thing to do is stop putting money in that account, and handle the bills/shopping yourself
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 02:48 PM
1

Not yet no
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 01:19 AM
1

Edit: she doesnt have a boyfriend, at least not that I'm aware of (she might, and that could be why were here in the first place). I was merely saying when she inevitably moves on with some other dude. Also, when I said future investments, i didnt mean on that same property. I wanted to use the equity to purchase more property. I wanted to clarify those points. Thanks for all of your feedback amd insight. I have been trying to contact lawyers for consultations, but most of the good ones arent wo…
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/22 05:15 PM
1

No, I misspoke, she doesnt have a bf that I'm aware of (not to say she doesnt have one), i was just saying when she inevitably moves on to someone else. I'm wondering how i can protect my income and retirement
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/22 05:04 PM
1

She wanted the divorce, but I'm pushing forward with it. At this point, we both want it. She did ask if it could be fixed with counseling, but I think we are too far gone.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/22 04:59 PM
1

No she doesnt have a BF, well I guess she might and I just dont know about him. I was just saying when she inevitably moves on with someone else.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/22 04:58 PM
2

Exactly. I have two friends that divorced horrible wives, and they jumped right back in to LTR. One of them even has a kid on the way with the new LTR...
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 02:55 PM
1

🤣🤣 Luis ck is great
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 01:43 PM
4

Perhaps. She is a manipulative and vindictive person. So I told her cool, she should go, have fun, and that I'll be going on a guys trip there soon
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/22 10:48 PM
2

This is what I mean, they choose to not be career focused and go for caregiver type jobs that dont pay as much
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/22 07:19 PM
2

Ah, good ol contract marriage, huh? Lesson learned no doubt. Maybe if she comes after the proceeds of your property, you can hit her with the other properties that were fraudulent. She might back off
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/22 01:23 PM
3

I like to throw it back in the womans face when they complain about pay gaps. First off, the man/woman pay gap is bullshit, it's a fallacy that women hang on to. But what I mean is, if the man has to pay for everything, then it's only fair to pay him more.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/22 01:21 PM
1

Well, I would be keeping my truck, its paid off. My small camper trailer, which will probably be my new home, and a pontoon houseboat that's docked at the lake. Plus my other personal items, likes guitars, tools, guns, clothing.
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/22 07:00 PM
20

Let it out bro. Cry when you feel it
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/22 12:50 AM
1

Will do, thank you
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 07:17 PM
2

Nasty, I like it
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 07:16 PM
1

That seems like a good deal
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 07:14 PM
1

Nah I dont wanna leave my kids behind. But I'm sure it works for some
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 07:13 PM
3

I think I do a lot as a father. I handle drop offs of one of our kids, she drops off the other two, albut picks all three up. I'm on the PTC as ways and means, so I'm always helping at their school, (moms on ptc too as president) i take my son to boxing on some nights, all the regular dad stuff like fishing, playing, cooking, etc. I'm no super dad, but I'm present and supportive, and a good caretaker.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 07:10 PM
21

Pretty much this idea right here. If she wants alimony and CS, then maybe I'll push to literally split all assets 50/50. Down to the fucking package of thumbtacks in the junk drawer.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 03:31 PM
6

Car is a 2015 camry se. Nothing fancy, but values between 12 and 15k. House was appraised earlier this year in may or june at 320k, we only owe 127 on it. This morning she woke up and brought this up again, like she was insulted I didnt want to be screwed financially. Trying to bait me into yet another fight. I didnt give her the pleasure of that.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 03:30 PM
1

This. And getting back with them would be like "Pet Sematary"
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/22 01:11 AM
2

Same problem. Especially when she acts all nice to me and like she cares how I'm feeling/doing. I have to constantly remind myself of the negatives in order to stay on track
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/22 01:06 AM
1

My best friends little bro did this. They had a kid together. The first time around she was aggressive and threatening to take him to the cleaners, etc. She didnt do that when they ended things the first time. But they got back together and when she filed the second time, she bankrupted him and gave him every other weekend with the kid, supervised...
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/22 12:43 AM
2

Hopefully you dont have to give her any equity
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 11:55 PM
3

I was thinking about doing the same thing. Trailer in the winter, boat in the summer
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 03:57 AM
1

I feel the same way, even guilty too
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 03:49 AM
1

You hit the nail on the head. It's just under one year salary for me, and shes a SAHM, we've been married 16 years this coming March. I think I'll be on the hook for years due to those things. I'll be financially wrecked if I dont make a big move.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/22 05:09 AM
2

We've owned for 7 years, paid 157k, and it's now worth 320k when I got it appraised in june. We still owe 128k. I just want to move on and be done without having to worry about things besides our kids. This seems like a big paperwork nightmare and fiscal mess
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/22 03:41 AM
0

You can do a quit claim deed and be done with the house without a refi. I'd recommend she give you half the equity though, so maybe you should still refi after all
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/22 02:51 PM
2

Robert glover
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/22 03:21 AM
1

Will do thank you
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 04:56 PM
1

Thank you
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 04:55 PM
2

Hes right man. Taking back a cheating spouse hurts you in such a way few words can explain it. It tarnishes your soul as a man, and its cancer to your thoughts. Do not EVER take back a cheater. No matter how much you love them. Dont you love yourself?
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 02:25 PM
2

I like your point, thanks for this. I dont have a lawyer yet, dont even know where to start, how to file, etc. A lawyer seems like the best place to get info
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 02:07 PM
1

Youre pretty lucky, all things considered, I suppose! My stbxw doesnt have a real job, and works for caterers under the table. Not even enough to cover the mortgage, though. I dont wanna get stuck with alimony or her bills so in my head, I'm thinking the home is plenty settlement for her. Of course, everything can change in a split second and she can decide to come after me financially
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 02:06 PM
2

That's true, I can only control myself. If she decides to be nasty, it's out of my control. But I should be prepared. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 02:00 PM
4

Thanks for the tip!
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 12:07 AM
5

We are actually quite amicable, I dont want to hurt her and a restraining order would probably affect our kids more than each other
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 12:07 AM
10

She offered to swap, but I dont mind the couch. Better tv, easy access to my patio, kitchen and garage.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 12:06 AM
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