Child Support

hardwarequestions · 2012-08-15T22:43:01+00:00

your options are the courts. it's their job to verify and enforce the necessary payments. unfortunately, there are some ways of "beating the system" and having a close friend or relative pay him in cash is one of those ways. that may just be the situation for the forseeable future.

you mentioned he's not very involved in the child's life...you should probably assume and act as if this is basically your kid than your's. unfortunately.

cpjackso · 2012-08-15T23:30:41+00:00

What about negotiating with the father and asking him to look after the child more often if he can't contribute for whatever reason? This would be good for everyone involved?

strangersadvice · 2012-08-15T23:48:29+00:00

In an ideal world, the father would get to see his son more than 4 days a month, grow to love him, and be willing to give the shirt off his back to support him. What actually happens is that the [custodial parent] uses the child as the instrument to cause harm to the father, the father loves the child but resents the situation... and rarely gets to see him anyway, and the kid is the one who gets hurt.

Although the Courts are the ultimate authority, they are not the best solution. Put the bitterness of your relationship behind you and concentrate on the boy. You may even become friends with the father again. Set up a schedule where you Both tend to the boy (in a public space or playground). Set ground rules... no talking about money. Let the boy spend more time with dad. Then, in a call or by letter, explain that you really do need child support for the expenses.

One problem I have seen is mothers using child support to get their nails or hair done, or to buy those candy red ferragamos . You are not one of those, are you? Spend the money on feeding, clothing, and educating the child, and keeping a roof over his head.

hardwarequestions · 2012-08-15T22:25:39+00:00

[permanently deleted]

rightsbot · 2012-08-15T22:00:18+00:00

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2012-08-16T03:59:48+00:00

As much as I hate the current system of child support, if you are truly in such a desperate position the only option I can think of is the courts. You need to do what is necessary for your child's wellbeing. Please bear in mind though, there will probably be many opportunities for abuse of the system on your end; I hope that despite your personal feelings for the father you don't go overboard as we so often hear about on this subreddit.

Good luck.

Title	Child Support
Author	CyntiaZombieEater
Upvotes	3
Comments	18
Date	August 15, 2012 9:59 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/ya9sw/child_support/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/child-support.1015771 https://theredarchive.com/post/1015771

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