Once Rare in Rural America, Divorce Is Changing the Face of Its Families

2011-03-25T02:28:04+00:00

You'd have to be a moron to get married these days.

Sarstan · 2011-03-24T17:40:11+00:00

This may sound mean at first, but love is the stupidest, yet most wildly used, reason for getting married and is often the type of marriage that breaks apart.

What I mean by this is a couple should have a REASON to be married to someone else, other than loving them (which, in my opinion, is also critical). For instance, my wife and I have treated our marriage as a teamwork binding. She is good at specific tasks, I'm good at other specific tasks, and because it covers far more skills together than individually, we work well together. Should we get divorced, we both face a position of losing out on each others' skills.

Now at first this works out to figuring "Gee, if I have the same skill sets as another man, why doesn't she run off?" As it were, that's a hassle for starters. Some find it more of a bother than others, but neither one of us wants a divorce in our life. I also feel that my skill set isn't easily matched, so she'd have trouble finding someone that can do all I do that she needs. This is also where the love factor comes in. We love one another, but that isn't the backbone of our relationship. Our skills, mutual trust, and mutual interests and understandings are the bricks of this building, love being more so the mortar than the structure itself.

Anyway, in my opinion, love is what makes people want to marry, and once they start to realize there's nothing there to stay for and love starts to settle (maybe even infatuation thought to be love), you start to find yourself with no reason to stay with the person.

As someone who's watched nearly every other couple around me dissolve their relationship which was founded on "I love them", I cringe. Love can do many things for you, but reminding yourself that a marriage is, in it's basic form, a legally binding contract to share and act as one body with another person, it's hard to find love as the only thing able to actually hold two people together for life.

Also, my wife and I are not Christian or any other religious backing. As much as the idea of God binding a man and woman together, it's not at all essential.

Title	Once Rare in Rural America, Divorce Is Changing the Face of Its Families
Author	lukins
Upvotes	13
Comments	9
Date	March 24, 2011 1:40 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/gaguc/once_rare_in_rural_america_divorce_is_changing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/once-rare-in-rural-america-divorce-is-changing-the.1041780 https://theredarchive.com/post/1041780

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