I usually think that Alternet is a bad joke, but this is a pretty decent article about how therapists can work with male patients without expecting them to act like women.

impotent_rage · 2010-06-07T20:06:32+00:00

What a truly excellent article. I've saved it for my own future reference, thanks so much for linking to it. I read something similar, a while ago, about how it can be challenging to talk to men about depression or it can be hard for men to accept help for depression, because it feels weak to them to seek assistance with a mood disorder. The article talked about how it is helpful to explain to male patients that it is by taking medication and seeking treatment that they are taking charge of their lives, and that by allowing the depression to run untreated, they are basically giving in to defeat and accepting a powerless role in letting the depression control them. The article suggested that when men think of it in those terms, they realize that it is empowering, not emasculating, to accept help.

SarahC · 2010-06-08T01:41:48+00:00

If what this article says is true, my relationship with my ex suddenly makes a lot of sense now. Thank you, /r/MensRights and OP, for shedding light on the matter. It couldn't have saved our relationship, because there was more to it than communication and hurt feelings, but I will certainly keep this in mind the next time I meet a guy.

kanuk876 · 2010-06-08T00:32:21+00:00

FTA:

When we respect their defenses, honor their intentions in doing the work, speak to them in Guy Talk, and engage them with therapeutic transparency and self-disclosure, the differences in treating men and treating women diminish dramatically.

Or, in other words.... most therapists engage both men and women in "Girl Talk", and are then surprised when it doesn't work for everyone.

In fact, I could summarize the entire article succinctly:

when we respect men, therapy works a lot better for them

2010-06-07T18:33:24+00:00

That's a really interesting article. I just assumed that therapists kind of adapted to whomever they were treating.

Has anyone had personal experience with this?

ENTP · 2010-06-08T04:31:02+00:00

I'm curious as to whether the talk of "responsibility, and providing for needs, and relational heroics", is part of psychotherapy for women as well as men... All in all a good article though.

nuuur32 · 2010-06-08T04:38:22+00:00

I'm more of a believer in the "there's nothing wrong with you" philosophy, and that psychotherapy should end. Saving psychotherapy is kind of a bizarre defense for humanity. As if digital communications will somehow end the 19th century and earlier modalities of relationships and bonding, and that any changes away from that former way of relating (progress for better or worse) is a detriment.

The article read as a defense for psychotherapy. One potentially fruitful nugget was the attempt at making great strides at a high level to some how nip problems in the bud or become more productive. "Become a better you!" but it read like a promotion for the Java language in both its bumbled structure and being prone to problems.

It wraps up as a self infliction, regarding how men and women both need to benefit from therapy to basically become normalized. it attempted to close the loop and keep psychotherapy in force as a useful component of society.

Comments