and this feeling sucks.

I am writing this as I have no complete understanding of being a red pilled man yet and I need critique and advice from wise men.

I felt like an asshole for flirting with women without any intention of being in a relationship.

I never do the first move or approach these girls as I am too focused on studies and improving myself. (I came from a complete failure piece of shit life so I want to be a better man to please myself)

but you know what? I am still a bitch and a BP type of guy as I am entertaining them and flirt back but whenever I got asked "so what are we?" "you're my boyfriend right?"

I lost my frame and just reject them like a nice guy.

I feel sorry every fucking time and be like "You deserve someone BETTER" or "I am not ready for a relationship"

I just dont know what to do or if I should stop flirting or maybe I should just go to clubs and meet some random whores who's most likely not into monogamous relationship which will save me some sanity.

I am very lost and still wanting to erase my bull pill syndrome.

Any advice to man me the fuck up?