Hello everybody! Does anybody else here struggle with relationship anxiety? I am still dating the guy from my last post. Brief summary of that: I heard rumors about him making girls uncomfortable in the past, we talked, he’s changed as a person since then and the rumors seemed to be worse than reality so I just took this as more information for the future.

The problem is that now I’m really unsure of my judgement. He’s very into me and had a crush on me for a while but I didn’t notice him, so now I’m worried I don’t feel enough for him and I’m just going to hurt him because of that. I’m also worried that I’m being stupid for trusting him and I’m just ignoring red flags, and he’s going to be exactly the person that people warned me about. I’m very close to my mom but I don’t feel like I can talk to her about this, because my sister heard the rumors about him and told her, so they both have a negative opinion on him.

However, he’s been so sweet to me, pays attention to me, been a clear communicator, very respectful of my boundaries, has friends I like, has a good career path, and just generally is a catch (aside from his past).

I had pretty much this exact anxiety in my previous relationship, which ended about three months ago (and was three months long). However, my ex actually did negative things to me. He flirted with/kissed another girl behind my back, and I made the choice to let it go after I found out, and he ended up dumping me two days after taking my virginity.

So because of my past relationship, I’m just really worried that I’m being an idiot for trusting him, and I had similar anxiety about hurting him (current and ex) by not “caring enough.” But I don’t want to ruin a good thing if I’m just being anxious about nothing. Does anybody have any advice?

Edit: for additional context, I struggle with perfectionism anxiety and have been to therapy for it. I've only had one prior relationship so I worry a lot about doing the "wrong thing"