I wish I had seen this sub BEFORE I asked for a divorce, but here we are...

After several years of a very toxic marriage, I told my SBTX that I wanted a divorce (Arizona). I wanted to do things the right way. I wanted to be friends after so we could coparent our son (6) together.

I live off-grid in a fifth wheel since the divorce. I like it. Own my own land, own my own house, somewhat self-sufficient. But when we went to mediation she was constantly using it against me despite the fact that we lived in an RV on the road for three years and lived in an off-grid house for the last year of our divorce.

So I pulled out, lawyered up and despite the general attitude about lawyers here, I have a good one. I wouldn't have even left mediation if she hadn't told me how bad I was getting screwed. She seemed genuinely angry for me and this came at a time when I really needed someone in my corner.

Fast forward six months later and she's contacted my parents (my mother is a narcissist, my father is her enabler and I have a DNC order with them), old friends I've had falling outs with, an emotionally and physically abusive ex-girlfriend and now I come to find out she's communicating with a woman who stalked me.

I have to do a custody evaluation, which I'm not worried about because I've talked to a guy from here and my lawyer is likewise unconcerned about it, due to the fact that the bar for "unfit parent" is so high in Arizona, which from all indications is a pretty hard 50/50 state. She's getting all my mental health records, but all she's gonna find is anxiety and depression.

I feel stupid for not getting the drop on her, lawyering up from the word go and getting this over. But you can't undo what's already done.

I'm very stressed about her basically assembling a gang of toxic people from my past. I don't think it can amount to anything in court, but it's very upsetting, nerve racking and stressful.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for from you guys, but I needed a little support. I'm a bit of a loner and the few friends I do have (who are GOOD) are probably getting a little complaint fatigue from me. If you can direct me to an online men's divorce support group that would be killer but I'm mostly just looking for kind words of support and maybe a little wisdom.

Edit:

No ROs, I have legal representation, one 6 year old son, and a very shitty unofficial parenting agreement that came out of mediation. I left the marital home under pressure from her and the mediator, but my attorney is already hammering her for this, because she listed the house for sale after I left.

Possibly also relevant: I’ve been single-handedly homeschooling him and among other things taught him to read.