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[–]Liberaler 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
A confident guy would not care too much about whether others think he is a loser/weirdo or not.
They are much less concerned with you and how you are than you think. Mostly, they are concerned with their own problems, not you.
The oppions on you will not be the same but differ. Some will like you, some don't. And, no matter how much you will improve, this will always be the same, as it is for everyone.
Learn to accept yourself first. Confidence has to be grounded in yourself, not some outside status.
Once you stop taking the situation at your job so serious, stop being in your head and evaluating your status all the time, you will arrive in the moment and connect to your colleagues much more natural.
[–]sincere_blasphemy 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Okay, kind of… outside advice, but I would say to re-examine your want/need to feel cool. The reason why I say this is because I suffered from a similar sentiment. I wanted to be liked, seen as a good worker, cool person, etc (as I think we all do). And my insecurity ended up being taken advantage of by the workplace bullies.
I was an easy target as I tried so hard to be liked, but they labeled me as lazy, a try-hard, insufferable, bossy, etc. I ended up striving to be so cool, so perfect, such a hard worker that they couldn’t have anything to say about me. But since that point, I’ve been chasing impossible standards and I just end up feeling not good enough ever.
A tip from my partner who IS the cool guy at work: never spread gossip/rumors, and maintain good relationships with everyone as much as you can while still protecting yourself. This turns you into the guy that people go to to talk about others, rather than the guy that people talk about.
[–]Repulsive-Fee393 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Be the flame, not the moth. Organise cool things and events that people want to be a part of, have a fun vibe, be the party. Don’t focus on trying to appear confident or cool, focus on having a good time playaaaaahhhh
[–]CocoBabeNYC -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You only THINK you appear confident on the outside.
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[–]Liberaler 9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]sincere_blasphemy 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Repulsive-Fee393 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CocoBabeNYC -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link