Online dating is great because you can vet and potentially meet so many different people. But the reality is that it is very difficult to use apps to provide social proof, create trust, and connect. No matter the pictures, the reality is that anyone on apps can turn out to be an awkward, disagreeable date, and this possibility is enough to make people extremely hesitant to meet an online date.

I have found that the easy way to meet partners is to meet them in places (different communities) where you are established and cool. You have nothing additional you need to prove, they already trust you, and so connection is nearly inevitable. After slaving away with the online dating, this feels so easy and natural.

The challenge is finding communities where the partners you desire spend time regularly… then taking the time to become an established community member. This works also because you already have conversation points and long term works better having common interests. This way meeting partners is like butter.

I have to remind myself of this when I am over reliant on apps and can’t figure out why it is so difficult. The best way is to get out, be vulnerable, learn new things, meet new people, and become part of a new community. It’s more work up front than swiping, but way easier in the long run.