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What do you think of women who dont have strong personalities? They usually go with the group and are easily influenced. Theyre very submissive and mirror their personalities according to their partners and friends. Are they worth LTRing?

thehedonistvagabond

March 22, 2018
4 upvotes
/r/askTRP
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Title What do you think of women who dont have strong personalities? They usually go with the group and are easily influenced. Theyre very submissive and mirror their personalities according to their partners and friends. Are they worth LTRing?
Author

thehedonistvagabond

Upvotes 4
Comments 27
Date March 22, 2018 1:12 PM UTC
(8 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/86bdwj/what_do_you_think_of_women_who_dont_have_strong/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/what-do-you-think-of-women-who-dont-have-strong.126267
https://theredarchive.com/post/126267
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Lost frame, got really angry, smashed some stuff and yelled insults because she cheated. Did I fuck up? She begged for mercy for 2 days until I insulted her and lost frame. Now shes rather more calm and careless.

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Comments

[–]dRePe_Thill9 points10 points11 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Should be worded as, potential LTRs with weak frames who are influenced by stronger female frames.

She will most likely inherit yours which should be expected and then shit test you as she is influenced by her peers. Had an ex shit test me all the time but I knew that those tests werent derived from her thoughts. It was a though her friends were speaking to me through her. Then she would most likely convey my respond to them and they could gossip on it.

Worth LTRing... plate first then see how it goes

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

She also tries to emulate my frame. If I dread, she would most likely too, if I become more relationshippy, she most likely too. Shes just kinda mirroring me. How do I respond to this?

[–]W_O_M_B_A_T2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Tell her to stop being boring.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

My wife is pretty much like this and what I’ve learned is that if I’m acting like a bitch she’s a bitch. If I’m happy she’s happy. However, if she’s unhappy, I am happy because I do not let her emotional state affect me. Someone has to be able to make good sound decisions when shit goes down so it needs to be you.

The downside to this personality thing is if your girl hangs around dumbass girls with stupid thoughts. I’ve got familiar with how my wife’s different friends’ think because I know what my wife talks about. When she starts talking about something else I generally have a good clue who put this into her head. You have to be careful with this because sometimes you need to say things like “Fuck your [sister, friend or relative], she’s an idiot.”

You don’t want her dumb influencers to water down your woman’s mind so you have to step in when necessary. The downside I could see to this is if your woman doesn’t respect your opinion and ignore you. If she does respect you then she will agree with you and dismiss that person.

Basically, you need a strong frame and to know you’re the shit.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Yes I understand what you are talking about so clearly! Thank you very much! It gets very sour if they lose the respect they have for you as suddenly theres nobody leading. It happened to me once with an ex. But what you are telling me about is so familiar!

Tell me how do you set boundaries with someone like this? If their internal values are representing their immediate environment, that means her internal values are always based on external forces... Thats like she only would have boundaries because other people would set them, not because of herself. Is that bad? How do you manage this?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I’d argue that the more beautiful a woman is, the less boundaries she’s been given. Most men, BP men, will let women get away with anything. What brought me over to TRP side, before I actually discovered this sub, was getting wrecked in a previous relationship. I gave my ex all the power in the relationship. I set no boundaries because I was a “nice guy” who wanted to be a good boy. I dated her for 16 weeks and never got past making out.

She dumped me for the cook she told me about. If I had any frame I would have brushed that guy off or nexted her. I gave her no boundaries because she was beautiful and she took full advantage of it like every woman will. When I met my wife I had a completely different set of operating instructions. I told myself that I was going to get ass or pass and I didn’t care how beautiful any woman was. You have got to have the abundance mentality that your dick is the holy grail because it will shock these women.

When you set boundaries and stick to them they’re going to flip shit. Most guys will break and somehow I never did when it came to my wife. Examples of setting boundaries for me was: No I am not going out with you tonight. I am going out with my buddies. Typical response from her: I guess I don’t have a boyfriend. Me: 👍. It doesn’t matter what the shit test is. You set your boundaries and you don’t budge.

I went from saying yes to every demand my ex made and blowing $100 every date with zero sex to saying no 90% of the time and going dutch on everything while having the craziest wildest sex of my life. You’ve got to have boundaries but you’ve got to have a frame or they don’t mean shit.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Okay understood. Thanks!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Women usually lack strong personalities because they rely on their looks to fulfill their biological imperative through their 20's. It isn't until they hit the wall and their looks begin to fade that they feel the need to develop likeable personalities to warrant commitment from males (some do this but not all).

[–]nofilmynofucky1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

By nature, women are fluid and will adapt their 'personality' to fit the strongest frame around them.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Hmm now that you told me it seems like common sense but unless you have told me about it i wouldnt have known. Thanks!

So if someone has a stronger frame than myself, how do I protect my frame?

[–]nofilmynofucky1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

DGAF mentality is the ultimate frame secret. Once you reach true DGAF status, you'll be immune to shit tests and the like. Agree and amplify will be such a part of you that you'll legitimately be amused by people's attempts to bring you down

Women often tell me I come across as a smug asshole - j love to hear that, as I fucked literally every girl who I've heard it from that same day (well, the pretty ones)

[–]abdada1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

No woman is worth LTRing until you are worth LTRing first.

If you are low quality, you will only attract lower quality women.

[–]thehedonistvagabond2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

I think thats pretty common sense isnt it. My question is asking for something else

[–]abdada0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

It isn't common sense, because if it was common sense you wouldn't have asked the question that you asked.

A man can not judge a woman versus the world, he can only judge the world versus himself. You are a third party between a woman and the world, not an active participant.

You had an LTR cheat on you and instead of judging your own actions, you judged hers. Your post is very recent and I read it new. You're already asking about a future LTR but nowhere in your recent post or comment history do you judge yourself well to figure out why you attract failures.

There's a reason for this: you are too concerned about others and refuse to be concerned about your own growth and rehab and progress.

[–]thehedonistvagabond1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I did actually reflect on myself and my preferences, and why I attract these women. It stems from my role models growing up, the women in my family. For some reason I am attracted to very submissive girls that emulate my personality and adopt my likes and interests. I have had 2 long relationships so far, and both were with girls like that. With both once I gained enough comfort, I stopped “playing the superman”, and they lost interest. I essentially made them from a gf to a mom kind of role. If the strong personality in the relationship fades, they probably have nothing to hold on.

My question that i asked above, is because I always keep getting feelings for these kind of girls. I am predisposed to having such a preference probably due to family background. My question is not which kind of women I attract, but about which kind of women I get attracted to. If my feelings always choose these kind of women, then I would need to start dating women more rationally.

[–]abdada0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

This has nothing to do with them but with you. They're submissive meaning they need strong leaders. If you want to be with them, you have to fulfill that need of theirs.

When you act weak, they lose interest. It's not their fault, it's your fault.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

What about internal values that they have? Their beliefs? Their boundaries? Their moral code? If I am the leader then I would need to set up all of this?

[–]abdada0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

What about internal values that they have? Their beliefs? Their boundaries? Their moral code? If I am the leader then I would need to set up all of this?

Not for them, no. You set them for yourself and yourself alone. It is not your responsibility to do what is best for others but for yourself.

Examples:

  1. I don't go to the gym so that I am hot and strong for anyone else. I am hot and strong for myself only. My girlfriend(s) love this about me, but I don't do it for them.
  2. I don't earn money so that I can provide for others. I earn money so I can provide for myself.
  3. I don't bring a date on vacation for her pleasure but for mine. She's my jewelry and if she fails at that, then she won't get invited next time.

I have my faith, my boundaries, my moral code for me and myself alone. Others look up to me for this and follow me but the purpose is for my pleasure and contentment.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Very well said i will save this comment. What if the ppl ur seeing dont share your values or beliefs or moral code or boundaries? You just next them?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Nope.

[–]AshyLarry270 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I would imagine they are more likely to cheat. A weak personality who's easily influenced? GNO could easily go wrong I would imagine.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

GNO?

[–]AshyLarry270 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Girl's night out. If she goes out with friends and a strong presence male takes a liking to her, she's cheating if she has a weak personality and easily influenced. A guy WILL go after this type as we are naturally more attracted to "feminine" traits such as showing submission, innocence, and weakness.

[–]NewBoomAction0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

I vibe the best with submissive, quiet girls. In my experience, these girls are typically the best plates. No girl is perfect but they generally aren't the cumdumpsters you'll find at the bar.

Ltr... lol. Why settle for one? Get a harem.

[–]thehedonistvagabond0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I’ll try to get a harem once I have my career stuff sorted. My work always flourishes when I am in a relationship.

Also yeah I get what you mean exactly.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I’m a superrr type A guy so I vibe best with these girls too.

[–]NewBoomAction0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Just read up on Type A. Yes I am also this type. Overly aggressive and impatient with my time.

Submissive girls are the best. I know what I want and I know they'll want what I tell them to want. In the end, we're both happy.

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