Asian male here. I'm young but I felt obligated to suppress any element of sexuality not only because it was expected of me, but also because I would do anything to not be in trouble and be cancelled. Safe to say I feel I succeed in self-castrating myself, but now I feel resentful that being aggressively non-sexual out of respect for women hasn't resulted in said respect. I've wasted my time and cannot comprehend being desirable by the time I'm 30, which will then be too late.

What do I do?