I wanted to bring some balance to an advice we frequently hear, which is : to be interresting you have to be interrested.

For a long time, I did follow this advice religiously. In all my conversations with girls, I put a lot of effort into digging their hobbies, lives, carreers and so on. It came from a genuine place and I became quite good at it.

But I took it too far, so all the conversations were about them and only them. And I think it made me appear like I have no identity or personnality, leading to a lack of interrest in me.

If you ever feel like you are carrying all the conversation and if ever you stop putting the effort the interraction dries out, maybe you could consider that you didn't present enough of yourself and they have no clue on what topic you wan't to talk about.

In conclusion, don't only talk about yourself, but don't forget to do it a little bit.