~ archived since 2018 ~
Popular
Other
[deleted]
apple
[–]Endorsed ContributorCrimsonCapsule 13 points14 points15 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Wait. Did you want to have sex, or not?
You complain about her sex drive, and push her off you when you actually have sex?
That's not beta or alpha. That's confusing.
[–]B14CK-B4RE -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Teasing.
[–]B14CK-B4RE 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You know what this reminded me of? That movie 50/50. Not the movie itself, but the guys relationship in it. I'm no doctor(So don't feel pressured to take everything I say to heart), but I'd recommend two things that have helped me through depression. 1. Stop masturbating so often. I do it every 10 days cuz of some article I saw on here. Quitting will drive you crazy into a state of testosterone driven manliness.(more or less.) 2. Do something physical. I'm not talking just working out(which you should be doing anyways), but something like boxing, mma, football, rugby. Hitting a mufucker is great. Great for self-esteem and all that, but getting your ass handed to you is such a surreal feeling. It makes you appreciate everything. Food tastes better. People annoy you less. That's why I did boxing. Go do something man. Never stop pushing.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
So you're not a doctor and you have "no need" to go on prozac and yet you do just to see what it'll do to you? And then you tell HER to go off prozac because she doesn't want sex and neither do you. You get mad at her because she wants sex when you don't any more when YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX at all anyways? You are all kinds of fucked up dude.
[–][deleted] 0 points0 points0 points 12 years ago | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That's why I put no need in " " because you didn't want to do it in the first place but did it "just to see how it affects people". Because, you know, all medications affect everyone the same way.
If she was "going off it anyways" why did you need to tell her to go off it. Why did you have to go off it "together"?
Sex drive is what drives you to HAVE SEX. She wanted to HAVE SEX with you and you "pushed her off". Had a woman done that to a man there would be a shit storm all up in here. But were you reciprocating "doing anything sexual" or were you just expecting her to blow you all the time with no love in return?
[–]foghorn19 2 points2 points2 points 12 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
I don't know where I'm going from here or what I want in life, but it's not what "most girls" offer.
You know the best part?
You've learned all of this while still young.
Ask some of the middle-aged, cuckolded, divorced brothers here how they feel.
[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link
Middle-aged, with a daughter but no cuckold nor divorced here.
Actually TRP made me realize what I really want and admitt it to myself, that I don't want what society tried to tell me is right. It still feels like somebody opened my cage and said: Walk!
And on top it freed me from depression as I came to the realization that I am a natural, but oppressed my true self since I was a child, which has mostly to do with my father.
I'm still getting better every day and never felt this good since I can remember.
[–]ferrets 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yes, mess around with SSRIs. that's such a great idea. you're really goin places kid.
[–]wishIcared 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Women want to fight for your desire, especially when she knows other women are also fighting for your desire.
[–]magx01 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
There's nothing wrong with reasonable marijuana use.
[–]2johnnight 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
We had sex all of seven seconds before I realized what I was doing and pushed her off of me. Too late, virginity gone.
wat?
[–]Blood_Vaults 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Break up with her. Tell her you're not satisfied with how the relationship is developing, and you believe it to be best to cut contact and part amicably.
Get a few new passions and hobbies to lose yourself in. You'll forget about her.
Exercise at least three days a week, if you don't already.
Read a new book every week.
Learn how things work.
Eventually, you'll find yourself reinvigorated about exploring new prospects with women. Or you'll spend 5 minutes reading #tinderfessions and go Galt.
Good luck
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
She already broke up with him, didn't you read it?
[–][deleted] 1 points1 points1 points 12 years ago | Copy Link
[–]autowikibot 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Kübler-Ross model:
The Kübler-Ross model, or the five stages of grief, is a series of emotional stages experienced when faced with impending death or death of someone. The five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced the model in her 1969 book, On Death and Dying, which was inspired by her work with terminally ill patients. Motivated by the lack of curriculum in medical schools that addressed the subject of death and dying, Kübler-Ross started a project about death when she became an instructor at the University of Chicago's medical school. This evolved into a series of seminars, which along with her interviews with patients and her previous research, led to her book. Her work revolutionized how the U.S. medical field took care of the terminally ill. In the decades since the publication of "On Death and Dying", the Kübler-Ross concept has become largely accepted by the general public; however, its validity has yet to be consistently supported by the majority of research studies that have examined it [citation needed]. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross noted that the stages are not meant to be a complete list of all possible emotions that could be felt, and they can occur in any order. Her hypothesis holds that not everyone who experiences a life-threatening or life-altering event feels all five of the responses, due to reactions of personal losses differing between people.
The Kübler-Ross model, or the five stages of grief, is a series of emotional stages experienced when faced with impending death or death of someone. The five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced the model in her 1969 book, On Death and Dying, which was inspired by her work with terminally ill patients. Motivated by the lack of curriculum in medical schools that addressed the subject of death and dying, Kübler-Ross started a project about death when she became an instructor at the University of Chicago's medical school. This evolved into a series of seminars, which along with her interviews with patients and her previous research, led to her book. Her work revolutionized how the U.S. medical field took care of the terminally ill. In the decades since the publication of "On Death and Dying", the Kübler-Ross concept has become largely accepted by the general public; however, its validity has yet to be consistently supported by the majority of research studies that have examined it [citation needed].
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross noted that the stages are not meant to be a complete list of all possible emotions that could be felt, and they can occur in any order. Her hypothesis holds that not everyone who experiences a life-threatening or life-altering event feels all five of the responses, due to reactions of personal losses differing between people.
Interesting: I Am Anonymous | Denial, Anger, Acceptance | String Quintet No. 4 (Mozart) | Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Parent commenter can toggle NSFW or delete. Will also delete on comment score of -1 or less. | FAQs | Mods | Magic Words
[–]redpilltruths -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
So let me relate to you a bit as someone trying to turn things around in a LTR.
We had been dating for about 4-5 months, and her sex drive was starting to disappear. One night I remember asking her if she still found me physically attractive, and she was like "Of course I do!" And her sex drive kept dropping like a rock.
Of course you want to have that "talk". I feel this need as well sometimes. But DO NOT ever touch that subject. Nothing kills sex drive like telling her you feel unattractive. She says "Of course I do!" as shes dreaming of Channing Tatum pounding her. You need to make yourself physically attractive. Lift weights is popular here. Be cocky, interesting, bold. Never doubt yourself. If you act and feel as though kate upton just called you a sexy beast then that attitude will get your girlfriends attention. She'll think, Oh shit, what's going on here (read: hamster wheel).
It didn't really affect my desire. BUT, I played this up. I told my girlfriend that I didn't have a desire to do anything sexual, and amazingly I started getting all kinds of interesting snapchats and text messages. First time in months! It was then that I had a small epiphany. So I played it up a little more. We're laying in bed watching TV, and I'm horny as fuck, and my girlfriend starts making moves. What do I do? I tell her I'm not in the mood, just to see what happens. Since she's never turned on anymore, I figure she'd be fine with it and just go to sleep. NOPE. Instead she takes her bra off and pulls my pants off. Holy shit.
I find this interesting because it's a take on dread game. Her hamster wheel is spinning on overdrive wondering why you lost your sex drive. Have you found another woman? So she needs to be sure you know what she's working with. However, you will see a contradiction on here because red pillers would say never turn down an advance. It reinforces a negative image in her mind you need to positively reinforce her advances by accepting them.
This of course worked out for you regardless. You should've rolled with it as long as you could. You probably could've gotten away with a no sex drive 2/3 game. Every three times she initiates you initiate twice.
I tell her that my sex drive has returned. BOOM. Just like that hers is gone again.
...aaaaand you blew it. Shouldn't have said anything. Let your actions speak.
Suddenly she backs up and says "Sorry, I'm really tired now. I think the wine made me sleepy". W.T.F. Well, I'm clearly disappointed but I don't get angry. I simply tell her "Ok, that's fine. I'm going back to my apartment to go to sleep." Then she gets upset and asks me to stay. So I stay.
Should've dropped the hammer. Let her know you expect sex and anything less would be unacceptable. You did make a decent recovery with threatening to go back to your apartment. Follow through with your threat! By staying you reinforced her shitty attitude. This is what TRP calls maintaining frame. Maintain it damnit!
"Fine. If you're just going to lay there and text people, I'm going to sleep." Again, what the fuck. I tell her "You just told me you're tired and don't want to do anything." She replies "Well, I may not be in the mood, but you should still want to turn me on. You should attempt to initiate, and I may or may not go along with it". What. The. Fuck. Now I'm pissed, and it really takes a shitload to get me upset. I tell her I'm not playing this little game, and I roll over and go to sleep.
This isn't cut and dry. Everyone will have a different strategy on how to handle this. I think your best bet was to Agree and Amplify. Don't ever try and fight with her logically. You should've said, "alright babe, gnight!" or "babe, im not texting, I'm sexting right now". When she goes into her hamster speak you should've aplified again by physically having your way with her. You can be like "well you're going along with it now, roll the fuck over and lift your ass up". When your done, ignore her and stay in bed or nuke her from orbit by saying alright im heading home, see ya!
The next morning I wake up and discover that she's baked me cinnamon rolls (nice thing #3 she ever did for me). She says sorry and gives me a hug. I'm still kind of upset, but I tell her it's okay; I'm over it. She says she had shaved her legs and had every intention of doing something the previous night but wasn't sure why she didn't want to (I know now! It involves the word "beta").
Same as my above response. Agree and Amplify. When she said she's sorry you should've played with it and said how do you plan on making it up? Something like that. The "why didn't you want to?" to which you should respond "I was busy sexting kate upton, I didn't know you wanted to join in".
Things quickly started falling apart over the next few weeks. She did something else that involved canceling plans on me in the last minute, and I essentially quit texting her.
don't reward a flake. You did the right thing to stop texting her. follow the 2/3 rule. Wait for her to initiate if shes flaking. don't reward it.
I enjoyed your post. It's a little tl;dr but it reflects a lot of issues others here in LTR might face, myself included. I hope others will take the time to respond constructively and critique anything i've written you should I be leading you astray. I'm still relatively new here but have been lurking for quite awhile. Use this as a learning period and move on.
[–][deleted] 2 points2 points2 points 12 years ago | Copy Link
[–]redpilltruths 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is why it's a concept that's difficult to interpret. I guess you just make make your best judgement call. I think the logic draws from the notion that if YOU don't give her physical intimacy (by not initiating and not accepting her advances) she'll want to find it from someone else. Not double down on getting you to accept her advances. That's why I found your strategy success interesting.
If you had to narrow it down though, the best time to reject an advance and maintain frame is after one of your advances is rejected. Say your in bed and decide to start fondeling her and she quickly shoots you down ("stop, I'm too tired!"). Well, you don't give a shit and go do your own thing. She sees your unphased and is ignoring you and then begins to try and turn you on. This is where you reject her. You don't want to send the message that it's ok to reject your advances as long as she comes back around on her terms. No, she needs to accept things on your terms.
Now, if you were in bed, same scenario as above, and she first initiates, that's something you don't want to reject.
[–]JohnGalt316 -5 points-4 points-3 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
says he doesn't need prozac; writes about his feelings of despair and depression
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
[–]Endorsed ContributorCrimsonCapsule 13 points14 points15 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]B14CK-B4RE -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]B14CK-B4RE 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points0 points0 points | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]foghorn19 2 points2 points2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 2 points3 points4 points [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ferrets 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]wishIcared 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]magx01 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]2johnnight 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Blood_Vaults 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 points1 points1 points | Copy Link
[–]autowikibot 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]redpilltruths -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 2 points2 points2 points | Copy Link
[–]redpilltruths 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]JohnGalt316 -5 points-4 points-3 points (1 child) | Copy Link