Flirting With Hot Women is Exhilarating

There’s nothing more sexually intoxicating than flirting with a hot woman. This is particularly true when she’s flirting back. When she’s smiling and laughing. When those thick, silky lashes are fluttering up and down. When she’s turning toward you. When she’s leaning in. When she’s giving you “those eyes.” When she touches you (or if you’re really doing things right - when she gives you a playful elbow to the ribs). These silent cues are what make flirting so much fun. It’s the silent language of the woman, when she’s ready to pounce.

So how do you achieve that result? How do you elicit that provocative silent language?

Well, a significant component of that desired result is successful flirting. The building of playful, sexual tension. And flirting is about much more than the words you speak. The first component is having a Sexual Presence.

What is Sexual Presence?

Think about your face. What would your face look like if you were bedding women on the regular? Would there be a little cockiness? A mild smirk? A look that says you’re just a little “too confident?” Of course there would. Guys with numerous female options: that’s what their faces look like.

Think about your walk. Your swagger. Would you walk into a bar? No. You would stroll in. Slowly and confidently. You’re gaze slow and steady.

What would your eye contact look like? Would it be timid and shifty? Would it be uncertain? Of course not. It would be the eyes of a man who gets laid. The burning eyes of a man who is around women for sex. He knows it. They know it. There’s no shame. Nothing to hide.

So how do you achieve that Sexual Presence? In particular, how do you achieve it if you don’t currently get laid on the regular? Do you just “pretend” that you bed women and that aura of sexual presence suddenly surrounds you? Do you just think happy thoughts? Of course not. Success is about specific, concrete steps. Not feel-good bullshit.

What follows are 2 specific steps that you can take right now to increase your Sexual Presence dramatically.

Step 1: Be Non-Reactive

Being non-reactive really means two things. Either: (a) not reacting to a situation or statement at all, or (b) having a delayed reaction. This is best explained by example.

For the first example, let’s step away from humans. Think about a lion on the prairie. He’s dozing. The pride of females and cubs is all around doing whatever. Suddenly there’s a ruckus within the pride. A couple of females begin to quarrel. There’s roaring and growling. Cubs are scampering off everywhere for cover.

Does the male lion pop his head up suddenly to see what the fuss is all about? Probably not. He probably does nothing. Literally just lays there. Unphased. Uninterested. If he does choose to look over, it’s often with a delay. One beat…..two beats….three beats…..and then, maybe, he slowly lifts his head, looks over, and then goes back to sleep.

That is being non-reactive or having a delayed reaction.

Now let’s move to women. You’re sitting across the table from a blazing hot girl. The vibe is sensual. The conversation is good. The eye contact is strong. The silent language is starting to appear. Then suddenly a waiter drops a stack of plates and few feet away. There’s a huge crash followed by a cacophony of gasps and shrieks from the surrounding tables. Heads turn. Eyes go wide. A grouchy old man starts making nasty comments about “the help.”

What do you do….? That’s right. Nothing. You do nothing.

You don’t turn your head. You don’t get startled in your chair. You don't have a reaction. At all. A clumsy waiter breaking the dishware has nothing to do with you. You just keep looking across the table at your woman. Your eye contact: strong. Your smirk: cocky. The look that says “I’m just a little too confident” plastered all over your face.

Think about how self-certain and bold that non-reactive body language appears. It’s like James Bond casually enjoying a forkful of liver tartare while a shootout begins across the room. It’s like all the alpha male movie stars who are too smooth to react to the goings-on around them.

However she reacts to the smashing plates doesn’t matter. She will probably be startled and will look over, just like everybody else. When she turns back to gauge your reaction, she will see that it was….nothing. You’re just looking at her with eyes that say: you have no idea the orgasm you’ll be having a few hours from now.

Now that’s sexy as hell, and she will see it, even if it only registers subconsciously.

Delayed Reaction

You walk into a venue. Sitting at the bar is a pair of cougars. One is hot. The other is hotter. You stroll casually toward them. Your eyes are blazing. Your strut is cool and confident. They see you coming. You stick out your hand. Introductions are made. Banter is exchanged. And then the hot one says: “so you want to buy us both a drink?”

Ouch. The old ‘liquor me up while I scope for other young guys to take advantage of’ approach.

What do you do? Well the first thing is you have a delayed reaction. We’ll get to what you could actually say in a moment.

A delayed reaction means you just look at her, smirk plastered on your face. One beat. Two beats. The smirk gets slightly wider. She will likely start smiling too because (1) smiling is contagious and (2) you’ve given her no immediate reaction and thus no signals to read, and the human mind often smiles when it’s not sure what else to do. Three beats. And then you react.

The point here is that you don’t react immediately. If you react immediately, no matter what your response, it’s not nearly as confident as if you have a delayed reaction. Literally that 2 - 3 second pause makes your Sexual Presence skyrocket.

After the pause you can react in numerous ways. You can jokingly deny them with a variety of techniques. You can deny with conditions. For this example let’s just go with the “agree with conditions” response.

It would be like this: (remember you’ve paused here for 2 - 3 beats, then:) “Sure. But only if you two do something for me first” (everything is said with a smirk, in a teasing, joking way).

If you’ve done everything I’ve said, with the delayed timing, slow stride, confident smirk, etc, her response to this statement will be: “What?”

Now here you can give any conditions you want. The general rule for conditions is: the more ridiculous they are (without being unrealistic), the better.

Giving Conditions

You call to the bartender for a pen. When he brings it over, you order yourself a drink. While the bartender goes off to make your drink, you place a cocktail napkin and the pen in front of them and say: “Now I’ll buy you both a drink, but you each have to write down 5 reasons on that napkin why you like me.”

Then just look off, away from them. Good smirk. Confident body language. Don’t say anything else. Just wait.

At this point they may scoff. They may roll their eyes. They may play like they’re “above” doing this little task. So just wait. Be non-reactive to their silence. What you just said was the most confident thing they’ve seen all night. All month probably. It was certainly more confident than all the other guys who just said “yes” when they were told to buy drinks.

Obviously if one of your life’s rules is that you don’t buy women drinks. Or the first drink, then this approach is not right for you. If that’s the case, then just bear with me until we get to step two.

So if you’re Sexual Presence is there, rest assured they’ll each be writing down those five things licketysplit. Remember that even if they appear to be annoyed when writing down those things, it doesn’t matter. They are only annoyed with themselves. Because an alpha male just told them what to do, and they’re doing it to get free drinks. Props.

Now in every situation you have to accept that sometimes women are truly just looking for free drinks and beta male orbiters. If that’s the case, then nothing you do or say will matter. So if they won’t play along, move on. And in this case, you effectively said “no” to buying them drinks, without having to directly say it. You essentially said “yes” and meant “no” unless they did what you say.

As a bonus to these particular conditions, you now have a list of ten things you can use to tease the shit out of them for the rest of the night. And who knows, since polyamory is all the rage these days, that $25 you just dropped on a pair of Cosmos might well be the best money you ever spent…..

Now that you know what being non-reactive means, how do you start practicing and perfecting it? Simple. You start by following Step 2.

Step 2: Slow Down

Think about a man walking quickly down the hall at work. A man who talks quickly during a speech. Who responds quickly to questions. Who makes a lot of jerky hand and arm movements during a presentation. Does that guy exude confidence? Does he exude sexual presence? No.

Now think about a man who takes his time. He walks slowly and confidently. There’s no rush. People will wait. He’ll be there when he arrives, and not a moment sooner. When he talks it’s bold. He pauses to build the suspense. He makes them wait. The audience sits on the edge of their seat in anticipation. When someone raises their hand for a question, does he stop what he’s saying and rush to call on them? No. He makes them wait. He finishes his thought and calls on them in due time. When he talks, his hand and arm movements are slow, distinct and calculating.

Does that guy exude confidence? Yes. Does he exude sexual presence? Probably. Certainly more than the first speaker.

Now assume that both of these guys were equally “good looking.” Equally attractive in physical fitness and style. Both have an equivalent written presentation. If that’s the case, then what’s the one big difference between them? Speed. That’s all. Just the speed with which they do things.

The confident alpha male moves slowly, distinctly and with purpose. The less confident beta male moves quickly. He scurries instead of strolls. His movements are jumpy, almost twitchy. And the only difference really is speed.

In order to begin immediately increasing your sexual presence you need to practice slowing down. Slow down everything you do. Your walking. Your talking. The speed at which you turn your head. The speed at which you get up from a chair. The speed at which you eat.

At your next meal take note of how fast you eat. Are you wolfing down that plate of food in under 5 minutes? Is there barely any time between bites? Do you put your fork down on the table during the eating process?

Take notice of your walk. Are you scurrying? Are you in a hurry? Slow it down. Act like people will wait. When you act like that and make it part of who you are and the presence you project to the world, guess what? People will start waiting.

As a general rule, take notice of everything you do and low it down by 25%. Even 50% some of the time.

The conscious practice of slowing down your body movements will quickly and dramatically increase your ability to be non-reactive and/or have delayed reactions.

Summary of Creating a Sexual Presence

As you slow down and become non-reactive to your environment, you will see a distinct improvement in how you are perceived by woman. It will be dramatic and sudden. It may surprise you.

Creating this presence is an absolutely critical first step to successful flirting. Because as you will hear me say time and again: It’s Not The Line, It’s the Man.