I’m tired of delaying taking action until I get super buff, great fashion sense, and million other things. I never end up doing these things anyways. I wan to club tonight solo and force myself to face my fears and approach/have fun. But I am dead scared. Brothers, please convince me otherwise.

ls737100 · 2017-12-03T17:01:14+00:00

James, first of all, don't just start approaches women you are attracted to, just start talking to anyone that is around you. Really engage them, ask about their lives, make it all about getting to know them. You need first to get really comfortable just talking to everyone.

And clubs might be a bad idea, but one day a week, decide to go to dinner by yourself, sit at the bar, chat with the bar tender, talk to the people around you, don't look for anything from them, just have a good time. Ask questions, joke with them, have an opinion. You'll start getting really comfortable with this.

Next stage, where ever you are, go to the crowd and sit/stand near them. One key, people wear stuff they are into and interested in talking about, but maybe make it a little edgy. Airports are great as people are often alone and annoyed. You can easily get them in a good conversation that breaks that annoyance. I had a great one where I was at the bar and this cute woman walked in with a bag that had a huge cat on it, so I commented, wow, you must really hate cats. We spent about an hour talking, could have gotten her number but I was new to this pickup thing, she was 20 years younger (and I just realized women are less concerned with age than we are) and I was practicing.

But, don't immediately pick cute girls, start with old people or women you aren't attracted to. This is really about getting comfortable with joking around with strangers, practicing conversation skills, etc. at the same time, keep working out and improving yourself.

Finally, stop worrying about it so much, you're really young and it's good you are starting early!

daygamer0911 · 2017-12-02T04:40:28+00:00

No one can convince yourself of doing something. You are capable or incapable of taking initiative on your own.

That's it.

The fact that you're asking others to fix your problems indicates that you aren't ready to handle your shit.

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