I'm not speaking from any particular position of authority here. I consider myself a newb PUA. However, I've found it easier to think about calibrating my game if it's boiled down to REALLY simple concepts I can intuitively understand.

From my studies after being introduced to game 2.5 years ago, I think a good way to think about interactions is this.

There are two modes: "I'm hot." "She's hot."

"I'm hot":

  • attraction
  • build tension and anxiety in her
  • you showing disinterest, potentially causing her to show interest
  • screening part of qualification
  • negs, false DQ, FTC
  • push part of push-pull
  • communicate value: DHV via preselection, social proof, stories: I'm hot, I'm worth getting to know
  • assume value: I'm so hot I don't need to show you that I'm hot, you entertain me instead
  • peacocking
  • cocky-funny
  • frame control, leading, moving her around really boldly
  • showing your boldness, and that you don't care about the result (i.e., you don't care if she likes you)
  • leaning in for the kiss, but not kissing her
  • taking what you want; not giving her what she says she wants (passing the shit test)
  • I'm cool, what I'm doing is cool, you should get to know me

"She's hot":

  • comfort/rapport-building/trust-building
  • release tension and anxiety in her
  • you showing interest, potentially causing her to show disinterest
  • the SOI part of qualification
  • pull part of push-pull
  • validating her hotness
  • kissing her
  • giving her what she wants
  • she's cool, what she's doing is cool, I should get to know her

It's mostly about you being hot, and only sometimes, about her being hot. You're the buyer, not the seller. You never want to be over-eager with your interest; her interest must always exceed your interest. Newbies like me mostly fuck it up by showing more interest than the girl, and not building enough attraction. Occasionally, newbies fuck it up by showing too little interest and as a result destroying rapport, but that's rarer.