[FR] - First one! Date with a 24yr old HB9 Swedish girl. Long FR, it went to the pits...

2011-09-15T07:14:16+00:00

ONLY because you asked:

How do i go about establishing a genuine connection with a girl that will make her attracted to me?

Wrong: I attempted to establish a deep emotional connection with her about what she was passionate about (she's at a chocolate bar with a stranger and cheating on and talking down her boyfriend, she doesn't give a fuck about anything except to be fucked).
Wrong: I read her palm and establish more kino, but she was a smart girl and i think she saw right through it as BS. (saw through it, or you were completely miscalibrating with what you were saying... I bet you were reading about all her desires/etc, instead of focusing on what a fuck bunny she is).
Wrong: She was giggling, but I could sense that she saw me as superficial.. piss. (She saw you as that... because she WANTED you to be superficial. She wants to be fucked and not have a relationship, she couldn't possibly make it more clear by explaining all the needy guys she's hated in the past.)
Wrong: after the chocolate bar, we go to a park with a lake. (Unless you're going to fuck her in some toilets at the lake. Literally.)
Wrong: and i tell her that i am a devout catholic and old dashioned. (What the hell was the point in this?! "You want to fuck, and hate guys who hang onto you, but I'm old fashioned and you're going to have to marry me first!" Hey, may as well play impossible to get.)
Wrong: I took this as her telling me that shes not interested because she was like other guys she used to date. (You're 100% right on this, but only because you're exactly as stodgy and useless to her for sexual purposes as every other guy on the list, which is why you're off the list!)
Wrong: I start walking back to the train station with her, and i told her that I would be at the backpacker bar i met her at this Saturday cause I like European girls. (I mean, really, at this point, you're just begging).

Now as for your lessons learned:

You're meant to calibrate, they say they want a good man but have a history of slurping schoolbusses full of semen... you're a seducer. If they're actually scared and out of their depth, you're a strong provider.
The problem wasn't being arrogant or cocky, it's how it was at complete odds (and thus fake, or a lie) with how you otherwise presented and talked about yourself.
Trying to do a genuine connection here is what fucked you up. She wanted sex with no strings.

Cue the inevitable downvotes as I'm told she was a very religious nice girl who didn't want sex at all, and that you're a lovely guy and don't want to have to change yourself in order to get said girl even though she stands in stark contradiction of how you believe the word is / should be BUT ISN'T.

2011-09-14T10:23:32+00:00

[permanently deleted]

rowthaway123 · 2011-09-14T19:36:52+00:00

IMO, most swedish girls are very confident due to having had a lot of sex early. By 22+ girls usually get tired of the locals and head outside for wilder game (or go fully lesbian). They are more open to sex due to lack of inhibition from friends. But they generally still require some of the other qualities of locals such as respect for complete equality of the sexes, lack of jealousy/neediness, not obsessing over material stuff/money (which is strange given how they dress up) etc. They are well aware of the general world opinion of swedish/scandinavian women. They also expect good/better game from the guys i.e more of a challenge.

Her going out with you was basically a huge sign of interest and that she was already sexually attracted. I'd say her telling you about the boyfriends was just her qualifying herself/DHVing to you (i.e low self esteem related to being a swede, HB8s 9s are very common) and maybe subtly telling you to only expect sex and not a relationship. Her religion probably does not mean what it usually does i.e she just likes to volunteer and stuff and nothing to do with sex. About her being independent, you could have responded with how one of your ex-gfs was not and that turned you off or just that you admire that in a woman.

You could have agreed and amplified on the "player" jab and invited her home to view your home-sex-video collection or something. If you do get her (unlikely now), the sex is likely to be mind-blowing, the conversation not so much. Basic PUA stuff on being the prize, not being AFC, inner game, having other goals, teasing, arousal through emotion-based talk, vulnerability etc should all help. Looking good can help or hurt. Skip the routines and be yourself/more real.

/in sweden, not a swede

2011-09-14T14:09:54+00:00

I would have been super sexist neg style. In my experience gets the perfect reaction from a progressive modern women, like this girl. Very few guys try this with strong confident women so it might have a a stronger effect and make you look balsy. Playfully angry and shocked. I mean really old fashion stuff, sandwitchs and kitchens.

Its sounds like you got a bit intimidated by her and lost frame a bit?

RedErin · 2011-09-14T14:38:28+00:00

You failed a lot of shit tests. I take she's a HB9, you have to challenge her often and call her out on her shit. Disqualify yourself, while being flirty, lots of push with your pull.

Don't be too down on yourself, it takes very advanced game to pull a girl like that.

Title	[FR] - First one! Date with a 24yr old HB9 Swedish girl. Long FR, it went to the pits...
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	3
Comments	6
Date	September 14, 2011 9:57 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/kf7vp/fr_first_one_date_with_a_24yr_old_hb9_swedish/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-first-one-date-with-a-24yr-old-hb9-swedish-girl.1322510 https://theredarchive.com/post/1322510

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