I am afraid. Of what exactly, I will tell you later.

Here is a little backstory: I am 23 years old, have tight inner game, am a successful man in the financial world. I have looks and game that girls find compelling - but in the same time intimidating because according to them ( I heard this many times, most recently this weekend) "You are so good that it starts to get bad" referring to my ability to make any chick fall in love with me (I am the cocky/funny) and generally being able to pick up anyone I like. I am confident to a point where some might think I am an egoist, yet I am not.

I have talked to so many girls I have lost count. I have k-closed women ranging in the hundreds by the time I was 18, and I think over 200 by now. A usual night out has at least 1 k-close for me, sometimes even more (3-4) I have slept with about 15 different women, and had 3 longer than 1-year relationships. My routine is "she came twice I came last", meaning that whenever possible at least two orgasms for her and only those ones count while having sex (foreplay orgasms are just a bonus). My record is five in a row.

If you have read the book The Game then I am "The Dustin".

But this is about enough "bragging". I came here because I have a serious issue which I have no idea where to turn to, and can not possibly imagine a way of solving it on my own.

I am afraid of having sex. I have had it a million times, and still, I am so nervous about it that you wouldn't believe your eyes. When I am drunk then it was usually no issue, because, you know, I'm drunk. Recently however, I noticed that my anxiousness has leaked over into my drunk state as well, meaning that this is really a major issue and time has come to face it.

Let me please explain on how it goes usually (skipping the parts where I pick up the chick etc)

Whenever I know that it's time to have sex and I am supposed to put a condom on my boner just vanishes, and I get this immense feeling of being afraid. Sometimes (If I'm "lucky") the girl is on the pill, and then I can start having sex before realizing that it is about to happen, and once I am inside of her then of course everything is okay again. This, of course is not good from a health concern point of view and also because not all girls are on the pill, might lie about it, etc.

The anxiousness goes away with time if I am with the same person, it's really only on the first couple of times in case we are together. Talking about this is usually not an option, because one night stands. Also, it simply does not fit into my image or self-image. I am the most confident and down to earth mofo you have ever seen, starting from shopping groceries to bringing in multi million dollar sales for my job. I have no other fear or paranoia in my life (spiders, heights, small rooms, aliens, violence, being watched by a duck, whatever you name it)

If you would ask me what I am afraid of, I could not answer it. I am a logical and rational person, and if there would be a logical string of thought on why this is happening I guess I would have found it by now. It is simply a feeling that appears in my stomach and I associate that with being afraid, so I guess it is that. Even when I watch a Movie and there is a scene I always think to myself "Is this guy not afraid? Is it normal to be like that, and if yes, then why am I afraid?"

  • I give girls multiple orgasms with any bodypart of mine you could imagine.
  • I know I am a superstar in bed.
  • My unit is large enough to hurt girls with it, so it's not about size either.
  • I am nor impotent, neither gay.
  • As far as I know and remember I was never sexually abused as a child, however I had a seriously messed up childhood (I was left alone at the age of 13), but I don't think this would have some impact on it, and if yes, I could not imagine why.

So Seddit, do you have any idea why this could be? How could I get rid of the fear and be like a normal person? I think it is starting to get to a point where I jeopardize my pickup skills and sometimes deliberately mess up just to not go through the horror of having to put a condom on.

I can not live like this, and I am sure there is somewhere a solution for this, but I have yet to find it.