I've been on a bit of a dry spell for the past three years. Recently cleaned myself up; updated my wardrobe, lost weight and got back in shape (weightlifting also increasing my testosterone); not at my goal yet though.

Went on some dates with this girl. Slept with her one night, no sex. I don't know how I managed to not push it forward. Two weeks of text flirting and then she hits me with the no date deal. I was ok with this; (I accepted that I blew it with my needy texting vibe). Then I see her hanging out with some other guy the next day at the bars. I did know that the two were friends before. Didn't look like a date. An offhand comment from some friend of hers revealed to me that it was a date; though he's kind of an idiot and may not know what he was talking about. (I think I'm trying to find something to tell me its not so bad, trying not to accept the ugly truth; so I have a way to tell myself it could still happen with this girl. I need to learn not to hope.)

Besides rock solid inner-game; how do you not rage at being lied to? I guess I shouldn't shit where I eat. Now I get to see this girl every few days. I was concerned before that I would come off as bitter when I tried to play it cool whenever I saw her again.

Now I think I just simply will not care. I think she will die off as a person I even care about. I know for the next few days I'm going to be a little bummed. It's nowhere near the bumminess I have felt in the past though.

What I learned:

I started slacking off with the activities I have been doing that have recently been increasing my confidence. I'd say I let her affect this; and this effected my confidence. Won't allow that anymore. I think I'll pursue these activities more now.

I shall cut back hardcore on my texting. Even if I think a girl is shy.

What I know:

Even though the comment (that revealed it was a date) has me at my worst may be wrong; I need to become indifferent to the girl. Not ignore her, not be bitter; but to just see her as an inanimate object that happens to talk too.

Pursue personal achievement and continue increasing my untouchable self-confidence.

Get back out there and waste no time dwelling on anything.

I know I'm don't care nearly as much as I did 40 minutes ago.

Closing:

If you guys have anything you might like to touch on or add that would be appreciated. How you would analyze the situation? If you think I should learn anything else. Maybe your strategies for turning the girl into an inanimate object. Did you ever find yourself in a similar situation; how did you play it cool?

I would not expect pity from you guys and I don't want it.

EDIT: I appreciate the input guys. You've given me some things to think about and embody.