The following is the copy/paste from my most recent blog entry. My field report:

Well its definitely been an active week. Last night, despite an early work day to look forward to, I went out to the cities to see Childish Gambino (aka Donald Glover) play a concert. It was a complete last minute decision, but I'm more than glad I went. As you know, getting out frequently, especially when you don't really feel like it, is how you begin to really succeed in social interactions. Its all about gaining skills through plenty of experiences. So even though I was tempted to stay in, get a good night's rest, and rise and shine early for work, I decided to catch the concert and go bar hopping until 2 a.m. instead. I'm a little sluggish today, but I learned plenty last night and it was a great time.

The best part was that I only knew one person in the group I was going with. I love these situations as I feel it gives me plenty of room to shine. I think I come off the strongest when meeting new people (since I'm usually just plain excited to be out), so I tend to make great first impressions. So after meeting everyone at the stage, going through the greeting process, and grabbing some drinks, the show came and went. After a wild time, we decided the night didn't have to end and decided to hit a few rooftop bars for kicks. And this is where the meat of the article comes to light.

Initiatives; they need to come from a place of meaning. Its crazy thinking about it, but the same exact action done with two different intentions in mind, will look 100% different to the girl, even if its completely subconsciously. They will see through the bullshit and react accordingly. I was reminded of this after an incident at the last bar.

First, I should preface with what happened earlier in the night. We were just arriving at the first bar, a bit tipsy and feeling incredible after an adrenaline pumping concert, and I immediately noticed a few gorgeous girls at the bar. In my unbreakable state, I walk up to them and start talking (completely wowing the group of people I was with, who still know nearly nothing about me) and sharing a few laughs.

In the moment, out of no where, I just decided to lean down and sip from one of their drinks. It sounds hilariously stupid, and it was. But I was just in that "I really don't give a damn" mode that's always so much fun and decided "I'm going to do it." At first, they were shocked. Their eyes widened and I was initially shoved away. I don't blame them. I mean, I just drank from one of their drinks, completely uninvited. But after a second they were both laughing and playfully shoving me, yelling "Omigosh, you're crazy!" They absolutely ate it up.

Well, the group and I bounced around a little more before ending up at the last bar of the night. I noticed a few girls by the bar, one of them extremely cute. At this stage in the night, it was getting late, everyone was exhausted, and we had all come down from our "concert high." We were still having a great time, but you could definitely tell there was a big change in overall mood. But regardless, I walked up to these two girls and started talking.

They smiled a bit as a talked and were polite. We exchanged names and I made them burst out laughing a few times, but I could tell they weren't exactly wanting to hang around and probably just wanted to go back to their table or wherever. I was losing their interest fast. So out of desperation, my brain thought "Hey, remember that thing you did at the other bar? That worked! Do that here and you'll be back in!" So mid sentence, I leaned in a sipped from one of the girls' drinks.

She flipped, the fuck, out.

She screamed "Ewww!" and tossed her straw away, giving me a death stare of all death stares. Her friend just looked at me in a confused manner and mouthed "What the hell?" They both rolled their eyes and immediately walked away. I wasn't offended by the rejection (I was actually laughing pretty hard just because of their wildly different reaction from what I was expecting), but it definitely gave me something to think on and a lesson to take away.

See, the first time I did it, my initiative was coming from a place of completely different intentions than the second time. The first time, I didn't care what I was doing or what reaction it would get. I just did it. And girls can tell; they can tell 100% of the time what your intentions are when you act boldly. They can see if its coming from a place of badassedness, or complete bullshit.

The second time, it was a desperation mood. It was a "Hey this worked before" thing I tried to pull out of my sleeve and it backfired completely. And this is why meeting girls and dating is never about rehearsing lines or following formulas for success (even though many people wish it were that easy). If your mind isn't in it and if your attitude doesn't match up with what you are doing, you are transparent and instead of looking smooth and exciting, you just come off as creepy and brash.

Just a little food for thought. I definitely learned something, and I'm glad I had that experience. It really did teach me how worthless rehearsing rehashed material is and how everything you do needs to be real. Your actions need to be completely congruent with your attitude, or you'll just be met with blank stares.

Thanks for reading, keep getting out there, and have a great Friday night!