• Need some serious and practical advice on holding court with mixed sets with two or more guys. As in 3 guys 1 girl. Or 2 guys 1 girl. I'm going out solo now so I'm doing this to build social proof, make friends.

  • Going up to a group and locking in is the easy part. The hard part is holding court, because the guys will test you. Sometimes they just want respect.

  • Other times, you're imposing because they haven't seen each other in years and they're just catching up. Because I live in a small city and we're talking 300,000 here, a lot of attraction comes social proof of knowing people.

  • Tips for HOLDING COURT in direct approaches. Like it's obvious you've come over to meet them:

  • 1) Situations where it's friends talking and you're imposing.

  • 2) Situations where you've built social proof and want to open the mixed set. Like 2 guys and 3 hotties. And you're imposing.

  • This happened last time I was out: GUY: "Who are you? I've never seen you before" (frame: no social proof; low-value loser). ME: "You know who you look like? Someone I've never seen before". GUY: ...

  • And this: (Awkward Silence) ME: "So where were we?" GUY turns to girl and starts conversation thread about movies. Other guy is listening. We're in a normal conversation about movies now. Guys are still testy whenever I have to say anything, but listen to me otherwise.