Guitar players of seduction, how do you handle girls when playing guitar

puaCurveBall · 2012-06-11T18:58:52+00:00

You don't know any songs?

Maybe you should learn some, I'd think in 7 years you might be able to pick one or two up.

edit: While I think the above advice is most practical, it sounds like you are too stubborn to take it

Well play me a song

Why don't you take this opportunity to explain how "deeply personal" guitar is for you and how you won't play other peoples music, and then show her something you DO play, instead of just barking "I don't know any".

I just dont sing and thats that.

Why are you so stubborn? Imagine someone saying "I don't approach girls, and thats that". "I dont work out, and thats that".

"I wont ask her for her number, and thats that".

This is not the right attitude for pickup.

yousirnaime · 2012-06-11T19:36:23+00:00

Girls always like musical guys, learn one or two pop songs, even something like bad romance or some sappy song and have her sing along if you arent that great. Be a fun person.

cure_plass · 2012-06-11T20:04:24+00:00

[permanently deleted]

quanglewangle · 2012-06-11T20:30:43+00:00

First things first: Come off of it a little, amigo...

When it comes to guitar, every woman has encountered the guy who can play C, G, & D and stumble through a crappy cover tune. It's become an incredibly inconvenient cliche to overcome...

The truth is, they don't care what you are playing. They just want to be entertained, or perhaps even they're interested in you and using it as an icebreaker for some conversation...

What you're doing is alienating yourself by being pretentious about it, as opposed to being someone that could potentially turn them on to something cool and creative...

Maybe try asking them if they've ever played and then try showing them something.

Women see the guitar player the same way they see the person cooking/entertaining a party. The cook likes to talk about what he seasoned his food with, how he cooked it, managed to keep the juices in the meat, what he garnished the dish with, what wine goes well with the meal, etc... Do most women know what a Savignon Blanc from the Loire Valley is?... No, most don't... But what they do know, is that the person cooking the food is passionate about it, and willing to share that passion with them...

It might piss you off that some noob can play wonderwall and get some action from it, but in the end he's contributing more...

So, make it your goal to turn them onto something. Explain in a kind and less pretentious way why it means to you what it does, what you get out of the experience and how they should try it some time. It's art man, half of the work is done for you and you can never run out of things to talk about... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwBfazTYLLY

Qwouphy · 2012-06-11T20:00:20+00:00

Just because its not your main focus in music doesn't mean you can't learn and play a few songs.

StupidityInSequence · 2012-06-11T20:12:30+00:00

I play guitar and I've been in situations like this myself. I get how you feel about guitar and other people's songs, so how about an alternative?

You've been playing guitar for seven years so you must know how to throw a few chords together and compose your own song so why don't you sit down and write a couple. Depending on the situation try to have at least one, relatively melodic one (get some plucking in there, girls love to pluck) and one, more upbeat song for more lively occasions. That way you've got your own music to play for a girl when she asks and you don't have to spit out some stupid pop lyrics that mean nothing to you. Hell, similar to what puaCurveBall said, you can even describe to the girl the "deeply personal" meaning behind each song to show that behind that masculine exterior, is a nice, genuine and sensitive guy!

LETS_DO_ZIS · 2012-06-11T22:16:53+00:00

All of the replies here are great towards this situation I think. I'd like to throw in my $0.02 because I have a lot of very similar experience.

Fellow guitar player (and blues lover) here and I've experienced the same frustration time and time again when you end up as the guy with a guitar at a social gathering and you either:

(a) Don't know any of the songs people are requesting, or

(b) Can't be bothered to play any of those popular songs because I couldn't care less about whatever song they want to hear.

I totally get your feeling of stubbornness. I've dealt with that before, since I used my guitar playing as sort of entry-level game, which I occasionally come back to if the situation permits.

What I've done in the past (and I'll admit I've played my share of John Mayer solely to woo the ladies) is I got to a point where I did not give a damn what anybody else wanted to hear, I would play what gets me going and what I am passionate about. I'm a huge Kings of Leon fan and I learned to play "Use Somebody" and I play the shit out of it and put my all into it and everybody likes it even if it isn't Wonderwall. I've also played songs that the average woman (who isn't into music) wouldn't know and they loved it.

View it as an opportunity to share your passion (like quanglewangle discussed). I've actually looked into many of the songs that have been requested of me that I didn't know, and it turned out I liked them a lot and will add them to my repertoire.

P.S. 90% of the time I don't sing and play. People often know the words to the songs they request, and even then it's only the first verse or two and the chorus, so you don't even have to learn the whole song. You may occasionally have to chime in with the words if they lose track. This isn't /r/socialguitarplaying101 so pm if you have any other questions.

MARSpu · 2012-06-11T23:58:42+00:00

Ignore them. Do your thing.

mreggo · 2012-06-12T04:48:19+00:00

If you've been playing for 7 years, you should be able to just mess around and be impressive. Ask her name and make up a song rhyming about her!

AverageFunkyChamp · 2012-06-14T04:02:23+00:00

This thread seems to have run its course, but I can't resist. I am you, 10 years later (17 year vet here, same kind of attitude, not much of a singer in the least). You can do this three ways:

1) Do your thing: As widely agreed upon here, it probably won't work. You'll either sound too preachy when you explain, or sound stand off-ish and anti-social if you flat refuse to play along. Qualification in 2), below.

2) Leave the goddamn thing home (My favorite): 2 Things can/will happen:

2A) The other goons with the 3rd Eye Blind will get some girls, sure. Are those the kind of girls you want? NO. The Dave Matthews wannabes are digging their own graves with the chicks that are clever enough to see through the act. If you want to play and get girls, you want the kind of girls that like the kind of playing YOU do. Hence, back to option 1). You won't strike gold all the time, but at least what you do strike will be your type of girl.

2B) Your friends will DHV for you when you refuse to play some else's guitar at a function. Just feign ignorance, "I don't know how to play guitar." Watch as your friends roll their eyes and exclaim, "Pfffft! Don't listen to him - he's the best guitar player I know". It breeds a mystique that often makes people a lot more interested in your playing than they would be if you were just dragging out a guitar all the time. WARNING: You must be genuinely self-effacing here; No false modesty, no obvious, routine digging for compliments. Do it because you chose option 2 out of a genuine desire not to play in public, NOT as a cry for attention. Don't do this unless you're actually gonna NOT PLAY at least 7 out of 10 times.

3) COMPROMISE: This comes in two forms:

3A) Learn some fun, old-timey, but recognizable and easy-to-sing songs that you enjoy. The first song I ever sung at a party was "Cotton Fields" by CCR. It won over a group of strangers, I had a ball doing it, it was EASY, and I had girls approaching me afterward. Pick your poison - there's lots of stuff you don't need to invest a lot of work in to sing that will win brownie points without making you feel like like a sell-out. You can please yourself and still use the guitar/your voice to get some attention from the girls too.

3B) Learn some classical guitar. It will improve your technique and musicianship, and it will set you apart from the douches with their frat songs. Bitches love Spanish guitar. Get a copy of Frederick Noad's "Solo Guitar Playing, Vol I", and YouTube the shit out of classical guitar for influence and pieces you'd like to play. Then, bust that shit out and watch the panties drop. WARNING: Classical guitar is "gay" - it may attract AMOGS and shit-tests. If you're gonna do this one, you'd better own that shit.

EDIT: IF they want 3rd Eye Blind, or whatever: Give them parodies of that shit! I have a friend who rips out the sillies versions of the shitty songs that everyone loves, and gets laughs galore. Also: Television show themes are fun.

2012-06-11T22:11:32+00:00

Simple:

I play for myself, on my own time, on my own schedule; they are free to listen along (Alpha); I am not a juke-box (Beta)
Occasionally on a 2nd or 3rd date, I would have a let's go at the beach at night with the guitar, very sensual, light a fire, play a few tunes. In the winter the same at my place, camping over the bed; 10-15 minutes and then we're both naked.

Playing the guitar is very aphrodisiac for a lot of women.

Title	Guitar players of seduction, how do you handle girls when playing guitar
Author	cure_plass
Upvotes	3
Comments	19
Date	June 11, 2012 6:50 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/uwjlb/guitar_players_of_seduction_how_do_you_handle/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/guitar-players-of-seduction-how-do-you-handle.1333932 https://theredarchive.com/post/1333932

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