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[–]paulgualtieri 11 points12 points13 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
One time, a girl did that and I said "The way this works is you angle your head up about 30 degrees, and turn toward me." She got a kick out of that.
Didn't wind up hooking up with her that night, but wound up FWB's with her for the last 8-9 months. So, I guess it worked. ;)
I think if you can laugh something like that off, they respect you more for it. Many guys would get pissed and/or give up. I might have given up too except for the fact that, aside from dodging the kiss, she seemed very interested. So, I figured it was worth continuing to pursue.
[–]NickCali22 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I like this a lot, girls love quirky statements like that
[–]paulgualtieri 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks it just occurred to me in the moment, and I liked it. Evidently she did too. Cuz a lot of guys would get mad or just leave.
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 13 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link
Kiss her on the cheek - lean back smile and continue talking as if nothing happened. You went too early, no big deal, just brush it off.
Then escalate again with low level kino and try again later.
Had this happen other weekend - got the kiss 10 mins later.
edit* ok downvotes for k-closing? why? - if you're going to at least please share some advice on what you think I'm doing wrong...
[–]Ds14 -2 points-1 points0 points 13 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Because she probably didn't want to kiss you if she dodged your kiss.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Thanks for responding but a girl asking for my number and stroking my leg/crotch all pointed towards her being open to kiss!
Sometimes a girl is not ready to kiss but that doesn't mean they don't want to. I messed up my timing with the first attempt but she didn't leave or change her body language towards me so why wouldn't one try again sometime later?
[–]Synrez 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I don't get the downvotes either. You were just persistent and it worked, half of this sub talks all about persistence.
[–]Ds14 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Discretion is very important with persistence. If a girl does not want to kiss you, you shouldn't bug her until she does.
If a fat/ugly/perfectly fine but unattractive to you girl kept trying to kiss me or take me home, I might eventually give her a pity kiss/fuck, but I think that's kind of rude and annoying. Same goes for girls dealing with me or any other guy.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
You're lucky it worked for you, but I don't think it's generally good advice. It's generally better to respect someone's boundaries and decisions. I think seddit sometimes sends out really dangerous messages about boundaries, telling guys that they just need to be persistent and keep pushing through resistance, because it's just an "anti-slut defense." It's dangerous to assume that a girl wants you even though she's declining your advances.
I don't deny that some men have examples of persistence working, but it can also backfire. For me, a man not respecting my boundaries is a huge red flag. If he wouldn't respect my decision when it comes to a kiss, who's to say he would respect it when it comes to sex?
I think that seddit has some important messaging on confidence and self-development, but needs to work a little more on respect, consent, and defining when it's time to stop. I see a lot of discussions that emphasize persistence and continued advances, but never mention that there's a point where this behavior becomes unacceptable.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You have a legitimate point, but you misunderstand the situation.
There's a difference between a girl saying "No, I won't do this" and a girl giving the giggly push-away. In the former example, she just doesn't want it. In the latter example, she doesn't want it yet. Big, big difference.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I recognize there's a difference, but nothing about this thread makes it clear that we're talking about playful giggling. There's no context given, so I didn't just assume that we're talking about girls who want it.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's totally fair. In your defense, there are also plenty of guys who don't recognize a "hard no".
The backstory changes everything. In most other situations, it'd be pretty creepy.
[–]L1stigerLurch 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Never happened, rinse, repeat.
no need to hang yourself up on that. just means you hit a paperwall...spray some water on it for a couple of minutes and voila...wall is gone
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If she dogged a kiss it means that you misread her IOI, or that the location was not suitable (too public, in front of her friends...).
Learn the lesson, fine tune your game, do better then next time. It's not a lottery where you get lucky, it's something that you build up, and if there's not enough interest, you eject early and move on.
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[–]paulgualtieri 11 points12 points13 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]NickCali22 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]paulgualtieri 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]Ds14 -2 points-1 points0 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]Synrez 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Ds14 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Ds14 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]L1stigerLurch 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link