"How long does it take to get good?"
Every so often, someone will hit me up on FB, or run into me at a bar, and ask me that question...
And I instantly know I'm talking to a complete beginner.
Other new blood FAQs are "what's your conversion rate?" and "how many women have you slept with?".
Notice the common theme: a fixation on results.
This mindset is only natural when you're starting out and don't have a ton of experience acquiring other tough skills (being generally good at learning, in other words). I remember wondering the same things myself. Which is why it's good to address them.
First of all, there's no such thing as "good". You may think this guy or that guy is "good", because you see them doing things you can't do yet. But the truth is, the learning process is so incremental that the boundary between "good" and "not good" is extremely artificial. Sure, there are moments of epiphany and sudden improvement (for example, during a bootcamp most students experience a dramatic bump in their skills and confidence). But overall the learning curve rises with such a gradual slope that deciding when someone is suddenly worthy of the title of "good" is a little ludicrous.
More importantly, game is an art, and the more you know, the more you realize how much you have to learn. The better you get the less you worry about "being good" and the more you focus on honing your basic skills and enjoying every minute of it.
As described in George Leonard's "Mastery" (if you haven't read it, do it!) the very best at game, or any art, are the guys who are constantly trying to improve, polish their skills and figure out new things. These guys spend very little time (if any) worrying about who is and isn't "good".
Finally, your rate of progress varies considerably. It depends on where you're coming from, how much effort you put into it, how healthy your mindsets are to begin with, etc. Some guys can reach a pretty high level in a few months. Other take years. The point is not who gets there first, or even who goes farthest. What matters is, are you working on improving yourself? And are you enjoying that process?
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