Day 12:

Story time motherfuckers! I mentioned in my interlude that I do stand-up. Occasionally. I tell a lot of jokes and have zero problem with that, but telling stories is different. I usually decide three lines in that the story isn’t worth telling, or that the audience is bored, and then I just give up on it and it unravels. This is similar to my problem ejecting from conversations at the first hint (real or imagined) of rejection. And so, this day was a boon.

First mission: choose eight adjectives you want to display for women you are pursuing. Mine: 1.adventurous 2.intelligent 3.kind (not nice. Fuck that word) 4.selfless 5.wit/humor 6.optimistic 7.relaxed/easygoing 8.leader..y I didn’t limit myself to these eight in the following stories, however.

Next, think of some episodes/stories/events/anecdotes that have occurred to you. Then give them names like “the cupcake story” or other stupid shit. Then think about which of those stories display the traits you mentioned in mission 1. Then refine two of your stories. The point here is to have a strong beginning and ending. Add intrigue (ideally, find a place to invest your listeners by having them interact. Often using questions of shared experience), add vivid detail, and add humor (which is one of my adjectives anyway). Add value (incorporating your qualities without bragging), cut the fat (don’t dwell on insignificant shit), and cut neediness (the story is to entertain, not to try and prove yourself). They should ultimately be between 30s and 2minutes long. Then tell two of your stories to two people. I went with more than two stories, not only because I believe in the importance of this challenge, but I’m also feeling guilty about skimping on days 10 and 11.

Day 12 will be presented to you all in 2 or 3 installments. Even so, they are long. Hopefully, if the stories are crafted well enough, you will be so enthralled you won't even notice how long they are. However, perhaps you won’t enjoy that these are simply stories and don’t seem pertinent to seduction. But if you read the wording, the use of "i" and the subtle character traits each phrase illustrates, you may find it actually helpful. Enjoy:

“The Waterfall hike”- leader, adventurous, selfless.

When I was in Costa Rica, more than anything I loved seeking out waterfalls. A lot of them aren’t even well marked, so it always feels like you are blazing your own trail, which often times you are. I’d had a lot of awesome and crazy experiences already when going on these expeditions, and when I told some of my friends about it, they all wanted to go on one. So I asked some locals and they all told us of one waterfall that could more or less only be reached by following the river up to it. So we started walking and the group split; I was walking through the river getting hit with all these branches and shit with two others, and the other group of three decided they’d take a road because they couldn’t handle the awesomeness of the river. That group ended up having to ask another local for directions to find a trail to the waterfall. Eventually we met where the river widened and were all trekking slowly through the river, surrounded by this gorgeous forest, without another soul around anywhere.
We’d been traveling about 20 minutes when one girl, Tara, turns back because she’s having asthma problems. I offer to just turn back but she is adamant that we all keep going. One other girl, Shea, decides she’d go with her. So ten minutes after the two of them leave, Shea comes running back, screaming my name! “Help, Misterease, Help!” I look back, terrified. I mean, they know I’m a med student, but at this point I know absolutely nothing about medicine! I was worried it would be a medical emergency I’d have to deal with. At any rate, she comes flying back, tripping over stones in the river, her knees are dripping with blood. And she yells to us “Tara is alone with a man and he has a knife!” Well holy shit. I started racing back as fast as I could and everyone joins, but we’re all terrified and all moving so slowly because of the river. It was completely silent, and the whole time I’m thinking “dear god what am I going to do if I find him? What am I going to do if I don’t?!” I’m thinking this guy could have killed this girl, and could be coming for us! The whole thing seemed like a horror movie. I grab a rock in each hand,and started trying to frame a speech in Spanish to calm this guy down. We get all the way back to the trail head and Tara is standing there talking to the police, which was a huge relief. Honestly, after that 15 minute run/walk back, I almost cried seeing her alive. Turns out this guy followed us into forest with a giant knife, he ended up just stealing all of Tara and Shea’s things and then left. Get this, he was one of the people who the other group had asked for directions! I wish I could say I was smart enough to not go on any more hikes, but I did. I was just more careful. I can’t give up on the adventure!

“The Stand Up Melt down” – humor. easygoin, cutely humble.

Oh man. The first time I got on stage to do comedy…Listen, I think I’m a pretty outgoing person generally, I mean most of my friends would say so. I even used to do theater in high school! I know, I was a pretty big nerd, but I had absolutely no problem performing in front of people. But on this occasion, a switch just flipped or something. I think it was just the pressure of being up there alone and throwing your own work at the disposure of this huge audience. So I’d practiced my act so many times beforehand, and I know I knew it, but RIGHT before the show I went to rehearse it with a couple other of the guys going on. And I started it and just FROZE. I suddenly couldn’t remember the next line! And then I got in my head. I had all these thoughts about just running away and trying to tell the MC I wouldn’t be going, but I didn’t. I left the building, sat looking out at the water, took some deep breaths (and no lie, drank some alcohol), and I went back in there, listened to Eminem’s lose yourself on repeat for a good ten minutes, and then I went out there and busted it out. It was simultaneously one of the greatest and most terrifying moments of my life. I’m so glad I did it.

“Plane reunion”- cute, romantic. whatever. This one is just cutesy bc bitches would love it.

I’ll never forget the girls I had huge crushes on in elementary school. I remember calling them on the phone, and then their mom would pick up and you get that huge rush and you have to ask to talk to them. Haha I remember my friend being next to me in fourth grade urging me on as I asked a girl named KATIE? to be my girlfriend. Then I switched schools, alas our love wasn’t meant to be. But get this! I was riding on a plane home for thanksgiving a few years ago, and I saw her on the plane! This is fate, right?! So we started talking, I switched seats with someone so I could sit next to her, and when we deboarded, unboarded? Disembarked? I don’t know.. (humor, obviously. And interaction) I got her number and I started seeing her during the break. And we actually continued for a few months following since our schools were close enough together. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out… I guess we don’t have it all figured out in fourth grade. I’m way better at knowing what I want now (huge smile).

whew. hope yall got through that without a pee break. see ya next time. on the last installment of 12 i'll have some fieldwork using these, and a pretty amusing FR.