~ archived since 2018 ~

Approaching a group at a table

ben0wn4g3 · 2013-02-19T17:03:01+00:00

What do you think about when you approach a group sitting at a table? Recently I've been kneeling right down to the level of the table, this...

ben0wn4g3

February 19, 2013

7 upvotes

/r/seduction

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

PDF TXT EPUB

Support the archive

Everything here was supposed to disappear. Banned subreddits, deleted communities, cancelled blogs — much of what is archived here survives nowhere else.

It stays free — no paywall, no account — for the next man who comes looking, the way it was free for you.

I pay for the servers, the storage and the bandwidth myself. If you want this record still standing in ten years, become one of the people who keeps it online.

Support the archive

Post Information

Title	Approaching a group at a table
Author	ben0wn4g3
Upvotes	7
Comments	47
Date	February 19, 2013 5:03 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/18tqyb/approaching_a_group_at_a_table/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/approaching-a-group-at-a-table.1347665 https://theredarchive.com/post/1347665

Comments

[–]RandianHero 4 points5 points6 points 13 years ago (36 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 13 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero 7 points8 points9 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (33 children) | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (32 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (31 children) | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (30 children) | Copy Link

No, I just do other things in the meantime. Like hang out with friends, talk to people who aren't in a group, talk to the bartender, text people on my phone, watch the game on TV, write something on my notepad... There are countless other things I can be doing since I'm not worried about it. My good time isn't dependent upon talking to random chicks, and I've got more than enough prospects/regulars to not need to seek them out. If a girl is interested, or if the situation looks open, I'll naturally jump in. Those situations are easy to pick out and they're common enough where I don't have to sit on the sidelines like a chump wishing someone wanted to talk to me. But I'm not going to horn in on a place where I'm unwelcome. I wouldn't want some dickhead doing that to me, so I'm not going to be a hypocrite and do it to other people.

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 13 years ago (29 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 13 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link

[–]RedPens 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 13 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

[–]RedPens1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g30 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

So who are you dressed up for then genius? Getting dressed up and make-up are designed for impressing men, don't like it, don't do it.

I love how you feel you can pick and choose when, where and what, you're not the one making the moves here sweetheart so you can't pick and choose.

Girls like you are the bane of most men's existence, this self-entitlement you feel you have yet have no justifiable reason.

You, need to get the over yourself. If I'm so devastatingly unfortunate enough to bump into a table with you in attendance I would be MORE than happy if you politely moved me on, and as long as you were polite, your night would not be disturbed for more than 30 seconds and we would all have a pleasurable evening.

Why are you spouting utter bullshit about women 'most of the time' not wanting to meet men? Most single women are absolutely GAGGING to meet men, what planet are you on?

Anyway I do more than fine but thanks for your empathetic approach.

[–]RedPens1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

My god, you are so gamma it's astounding. All you can do is blame everyone but yourself for your own mistakes. You're the one intruding, but it's the woman's fault for dressing like that and giving you the wrong impression. It couldn't possibly be the fact that you just suck at reading people. You sound like a date rapist.

It must just eat at you that not every single girl wants your nuts. After all, anyone who points out that fact is automatically an "angry, self-entitled little trout". I'd tell you to get over yourself, but it's obvious that all of this bluster is just your insecurity showing through, and that you're desperately trying to bang as many women as you can to validate your own masculinity. Jesus, guys like you are fucking ridiculous, you know that? And the funny thing is I know you're going to get laid anyway, because the ones who will actually sleep with you are either insecure themselves, or haven't been bombarded by pick-up artists' bullshit yet.

So for all you guys reading this thread looking for advice, here's some from a girl: don't be this guy. If we want you to come over and talk to us, we'll look like we want to be approached. If we're just hanging out with our friends, don't invite yourself in like this creep.

[–]ben0wn4g3-1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RedPens1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g30 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RedPens1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g31 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RedPens1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I'm just gonna chime in here: women don't get dressed up for men. They get dressed up themselves and for each other. It's why you can tell a girl she looks good without makeup and she'll still take twenty minutes putting it on anyway.

I have a lot of female friends, and I can't think of one of them who likes being randomly approached by guys when they're just out with their buddies. I mean, think about it: would you be cool with some dude sauntering over to your table and chatting you up when you're trying to just have a drink with your buddies? It's obnoxious. I know this because more than one of them has talked to me after it happens to complain about it (interestingly enough, the clumsy game of other men is a great way to bond with women).

One of the biggest errors in judgment you can make is assuming that every girl wants to be hit on. But an even worse error you can make is blaming them for your own inability to notice this. A woman who doesn't want to be bothered isn't a bitch; you're just being inconsiderate.

[–]ben0wn4g30 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g31 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g30 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RedPens1 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g30 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I never much subscribed to any "method" of seduction. The problem with a lot of the approaches I see here is they're all using some crazy formula, creepy labeling system, or overthought game plan instead of just adhering to good old-fashioned trial and error. Do what works and stop doing what doesn't. If you've got any semblance of social awareness, you just learn as you go and you figure out what not to do fairly quickly. Following long lists of rules and playing the numbers game is a huge pain in the ass, and it's a poor substitute for just being relaxed and self-confident.

I don't need to stick out like a sore thumb because I'm already appealing. I can dress completely casual and nondescript, look like a generic hot guy, and still leave a lasting impression on women because of how I talk and how I carry myself. I can tell right away if a girl is into me, and it happens often enough where I don't need to float around talking to every single girl. I can be choosey and still get more action than most people around me. In short: this is old hat to me.

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero0 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g31 point 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]RandianHero0 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]gadelat 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ben0wn4g3[S] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]rikjames90 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link