So... what comes next?

recyclablebantha · 2013-03-26T06:01:39+00:00

For a while now I have been applying some of the stuff I've found here and several other sources. They all give very specific advice on how to get women, but I see a lack of information regardig what to do afterwards.

I had sex with a girl which happens to be a very close friend to a female friend of mine. For the past 3 days she's been texting me, calling me and fb be all day and i want her to stop.

How can I make her stop without coming out like a jerk to her and my friend?

I don't know this girl. I don't know you. And your post is rather low on information that would allow me to make a good judgement call. All you're going to get are peoples' best guesses, so take that for what you will.

That said, here are some possibilities & a question:

You were so focused on getting a girl that you didn't stop to think WHAT KIND of girl you were getting. (Was the sex any good? If I had to guess, I'd say not. Because you haven't felt like getting back to her.) Furthermore, you didn't qualify her as the kind of girl you wanted: as in low drama. If you handle this right, you don't have to deal with fall-out afterwards because the other party simply won't try to engage you in a way that's annoying or will leave you alone.
What has been the nature of her texts, calls, and FB messages? Just friendly? Or (I assume,) has she been professing love and you're not feeling it?
You seem to have taken a dump in your social pool. You're getting a lesson right now. If you don't screen right in the beginning AND you pick from your social circle, you're going to have social consequences that will hit you where you live. There really isn't a magic pill for this situation. No magic way to "make her stop". You'll have to have a sit down with her and level with her about what you want, especially since that seems to be different from what she wants.

TL;DR: Take the lesson going forward that it's easier to deal with this preemptively by disqualifying candidates early on for this. Or you can continue to have awkward sex with people you don't want anything to do with later and deal with the drama they create on their way out. You've painted yourself in the corner: the only thing to do is have a sit down with her and level about what you want (or don't want, as the case may be).

pichel-jitsu · 2013-03-26T09:56:03+00:00

"Sounds" like she's into you now. The only thing to do is be up front with her like previously said. She's going to get pissed; it's almost unavoidable. But as long as you're straight forward with her from now on out, she'll eventually get over it and you guys can get back to just being friends, but there will probably always be some degree of weirdness. There's no short cut for things like this. If someone knows one, please, tell me. I had this same issue with a girl. She was a very close friend of mine and I thought I was really into her. We started banging and hanging out and I eventually came to the conclusion there was no way in hell I could be with her. She was mad at me for a while, but she's over it now and we're still friends. You just gotta let her get over it and maintain your integrity as a "good guy."

kingcal · 2013-03-26T11:53:23+00:00

You don't have to respond to every message she sends you. Just give her the silent treatment for awhile. If she persists in sending messages even though they're unanswered, just tell her you don't want to have a relationship with her.

sisyphan_sophistry · 2013-03-26T17:43:23+00:00

What comes next? More sex.

Any decent girl is going to get clingy after sex. That is just how it is. You should always be prepared for that.

Talk to her. Keep it brief. Be honest about your feelings when asked, otherwise just keep it to yourself.

Try to keep your conversations strictly to making plans about the next time you will see each other. Again... keep it brief.

If you are at all interested, I can PM you the messages I received and sent in this same exact situation over the weekend.

rikjames90 · 2013-03-26T18:53:17+00:00

If you have to ask, youll never find out

Title	So... what comes next?
Author	dnb1111
Upvotes	3
Comments	5
Date	March 26, 2013 5:19 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1b0y0b/so_what_comes_next/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/so-what-comes-next.1349582 https://theredarchive.com/post/1349582

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