I get really narcissistic when I talk to people and it shows and kills my game

whb11 · 2013-09-07T09:00:34+00:00

Learn that you can learn from everyone you talk to. Everyone's got a unique story, so just be interested in what they have to say as much as you hope they'd be interested in what you have to say.

And if you want to please your ego, just tell yourself that by learning new things about other people, you will be broadening your worldview and can help you better understand your world, and this should both diminish and help develop a better sense of self for you to be narcissistic about.

TopHatCharlie · 2013-09-07T14:33:02+00:00

No offense, but you're probably not that great, nobody likes you and your mom dresses you funny.

It's okay to love yourself and be great but if you do and you really are, you won't have to talk great lengths about your superiority to demonstrate your value- people will just know. If you have trouble caring about other people, fake it. It's what I did until I realized that every single person has something amazing about themselves; and once that happened everything changed.

Afeni02 · 2013-09-07T19:37:51+00:00

Alpha's don't talk about how great they are, people see how great the alpha is. It's like a an insecure guy that works out, he wants to tell EVERYBODY how much he loves working out but he doesn't need to say shit because in reality, people can tell that he works out.

2013-09-07T18:28:01+00:00

Aren't you trying to get something from them? Friendship, sex, nice vibes, good conversation. There's a reason you're doing this.

There's some sort of inner problem you're facing if you think like this.

It's actually my biggest struggle right now, as well. And keep in mind this is a bigger issue than just seduction.

nwilli100 · 2013-09-08T05:15:03+00:00

Hey something I can actually help with. I had/have (it's a long-term fight) the same sort of problem and I've found two ways of dealing with the narcissism.

1) Try to beat it:

This is hard, but you've already done the hardest part and admitted that your overblown opinion of yourself is at least partly narcissistic. The next step is to constantly be scrutinizing your thoughts and actions for evidence of (unjustified) judgements of other people and yourself good or bad. This generally requires a lot of self-awareness/introspection and can get very tiring very quickly. But hey you're pretty awesome right? You can probably handle it.

2) Try to disguise it:

If you can default to treating people (in general) with some degree of respect you can disguise a lot (not all) of narcissism as playful confidence. The trick here is to strike the right balance of not taking yourself too seriously but not making yourself into a joke either. This generally easier than method one, but it will still alienate some people (usually the ones who can see through it).

In either case it's not easy to get passed egomania/narcissism and you will still slip up occasionally. I prefer to use a combination of the two approaches depending on how much I care about the company I'm with (if you care about them use method 1 as much as possible).

This is just what has worked for me, I hope it helped some. Best of luck.

Edit:

If you have trouble caring about other people, fake it. It's what I did until I realized that every single person has something amazing about themselves; and once that happened everything changed.

This is also great advice. Fake it 'till you make it. Credit to /u/TopHatCharlie

Subalpine · 2013-09-08T06:10:45+00:00

If you truly feel like the greatest person at the table, then you aren't hanging around with the right people. Truly great people surround themselves with smart, interesting individuals, and will be invited to places where those people are. You just sound young and though life needs to kick you in the ass a few times...

Title	I get really narcissistic when I talk to people and it shows and kills my game
Author	Deathineff
Upvotes	6
Comments	7
Date	September 7, 2013 8:54 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1lwn4e/i_get_really_narcissistic_when_i_talk_to_people/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-get-really-narcissistic-when-i-talk-to-people.1358033 https://theredarchive.com/post/1358033

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