What If I Succeed?

-People will have higher expectations of me -People will judge me more and criticise me -My relationships may be effected in a negative way -I will have a completely different lifestyle, I don't like change.

Along with fear of failure, many of us unconsciously fear success. Are you the biggest thing holding yourself back? Have you ever been close to being successful and started to stuff things up and lose your confidence and abilities? I believe its related to your identity.

Lets say you approach a girl and you hit things off well, and she's stunningly beautiful. You keep the interaction going, but you keep finding ways to stop yourself from closing. Why do we do this? Its because our thoughts and actions are not aligned.

When we say we want something...do we REALLY want it? when you say you want that hot girl walking past, you do want her, but your stupid brain and emotions also want to not get blown off, not get embarrassed or let down. So when you do make the approach, you are somewhat going for the girl, but at the same time you are holding back to protect your ego. This is why many times you don't get good results in the actions you take. Its because you are not fully aligned with getting the result, you are afraid of the success (or the risk of what it takes to be successful).

The scary thing about it is that most of us don't consciously recognise it, its a major sticking point for many people.

Lets say you want to be a rock star, your passion is music and its all you want to do. You imagine the fame, the fans, the travel and all the glory! its definitely what you want to do! But is it really? What about the friends you will leave behind in your home town? what about the haters and critics that will say your music is shit? What about the media pressure you will have. Of course if you are passionate about something so bad, you will embrace it all and go for it! as you should! But as these negative background things linger in your mind, you unconsciously hold yourself back in the actions you take to get there.

How do you solve it?

Well, you should learn to recognise it, we spend so much time ignoring fear and pushing forward, maybe you should recognise the fear, accept it and move forward, this way your thoughts and actions are aligned. Another thing is that we often have a fear of becoming someone else, this is a big one! As many of us say, you should be yourself and love yourself. This is true, but it doesn't mean you can't change who you are. You need to let go of who you think you are and push yourself to be better! or to be accurate, push yourself to be who you want to be! Its not like you are stuck with one identity your whole life. That would be a HUGE limiting belief that will hold you back from your dreams. In fact, if you look back from when you were a child, to primary school and high school...there is no doubt that you evolved your identity. But as we get to our early/mid 20's most of us stop evolving and just accept 'who we are' and thats that. I say fuck who you are, push forward and keep evolving to live the life you want and be the person you want to be!

Let me know your thoughts!

Also, for those interested in my free guide: 10 Mistakes Guys Make When Approaching Girls, heres a link: http://innergameblog.com/free-guide-book/