Friend improves self-image at expense of others. Am I overreacting?

pacg · 2015-11-01T10:44:25+00:00

You're not overreacting. That's sucks. He pulled a Tyler Durden on you and that's not right. You have to take him down a peg for the sake of your honor. Whether intentionally or not, he has broken that unspoken code between compatriots--golly that sounds old fashioned. This is an opportunity to shore up your self-worth besides.

I've been in similar situations where some guy in the group is trying to neg me while I'm talking to a girl. My response is to not even acknowledge him, to not break eye contact or rapport with the person to whom I'm speaking. I talk right through them. It's easy because shitty people have less to offer than confident and self-assured people; they're intrinsically weaker. If the person doesn't get the hint (chances are he won't because shitty people have no sense of nuance and are dense) then I move the girl somewhere away from the offending cunt.

For me, the last resort is to start a pissing contest. I'd rather just wipe my hands of the situation and walk away. It's just not my style. But sometimes this has to be done. In your case, I would've said something along the lines of "What's funny girls, is that he said the same thing while we were cuddling earlier. I let it go because you wouldn't believe how good it feels to spoon this guy." Why this? Because guys who do what your buddy's doing can't deal with homosexuality very well. Not usually in my experience.

But really what you should do first is discuss this with your buddy. Let him know you're not cool with that. If he persists then take him down.

recyclablebantha · 2015-11-01T13:21:33+00:00

Am I overreacting here?

No.

So my question is did he do the cardinal sin to his "fellow" buddy in this game. He is a nice guy but I think it was more of him not knowing what he was doing and how shitty his actions came off of.

He knew what he was doing. You could put him on notice that it was not cool the way he was putting you down and literally say that this is not how friends treat each other. Friendship should raise all the boats, not sink some.

His reaction will tell you what category to put him in. Depending on how respectful and constructive he can be...... If he disregards what you've said or turns it on you, then he's not your friend and should be expunged. If he agrees but still goes down the same road later, then you might expunge him or relegate him to a far lesser role in your life. Like don't hang with him so much, or when you might ever run into people you don't want him poisoning the well with. Or if he complies, then everything is cool.

Title	Friend improves self-image at expense of others. Am I overreacting?
Author	heroyi
Upvotes	4
Comments	4
Date	November 1, 2015 7:45 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3r2698/friend_improves_selfimage_at_expense_of_others_am/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/friend-improves-self-image-at-expense-of-others-am.1396872 https://theredarchive.com/post/1396872

Comments