What's bothering me lately is I'm perceiving a kind of divide between the advice offered for hooking up with women. There's one line of thought that goes, "money, interesting job, social status, extroversion.. or otherwise forget about getting laid." Then there's another school that goes, "okay, those things will help, but aren't required. What's more important is presenting yourself well, getting comfortable talking to women, and finding a girl who's on your wavelength.. someone you can relate to."

Here's a post on this subreddit by someone who is firmly in the first school of thought:

It's rather simple. He needs to bring something to the relationship market. She needs to be enriched by his presence in the relationship . Either money, security, social standing, emotional security, or any combination of these. Men marry for love, for women, it's a business decision. You'll never be disappointed if you change your expectations of what a relationship is supposed to give you in return. Oh, and remember, she'll always be looking to upgrade, so you need to keep your A game going, stay stronger with more game than her, and she'll be loyal. Become weak and dependant and she'll be looking to upgrade. Don't believe me? Ask a woman how she feels about financially supporting her man while he stays home. Women are OK with it in reverse... dude, be an alpha, and you'll have no shortage of women. Be a beta and it's the single life

I dunno, it strikes me as a very hard-line and rigid kind of thinking. I guess for those guys who meet these criteria, it's not going to bother you. But personally when I read things like this, I'm like.. "so you're really saying the other things don't matter? you're saying it won't matter if a guy works on himself, but realistically won't have a great vocation/status, etc?"

That brings me to my last point. I'm new to this game and a bit older than most of you, so I don't know what to think about this yet.. my cynicism is always threatening to become dominant, over the little bits of optimism I'm trying to gain, every day.. I really wish those guys who are pushing the "you MUST be an amazing man, or else, forget it" would adjust their rhetoric. It may be YOUR truth, but does that mean it has to be everyone else's?

In other words, it's not helpful for those guys who don't fit the traditional "go-getter" mold, and there's a LOT of us out there. We're real people, every one of us, dealing with actual problems: mild autism, social anxiety, shyness, low financial prospects, lack of higher education, and anything else you can think of.