Any tips or Books for extreminating seeking external validation

JoeDucard · 2016-02-16T19:55:51+00:00

the best guy for loving yourself and being internally validated is definitely Wayne Dyer. I strongly suggest going on to youtube and watching some of his programs. He's a genius.

kysmm1 · 2016-02-16T17:50:32+00:00

Probably not the kind of thing you have in mind but the essay 'on solitude' by Michel de Montaigne has great insights as to why not seeking external validation is a better way to live in all life.

Real_Cuban_Pete · 2016-02-16T22:46:38+00:00

"Models" by Mark Manson teaches you to be more vulnerable. My favorite quote from the book regarding this is "Being vulnerable forces you to accept and prioritize your own perception over those of others. Why? Because you have no choice. As you make yourself vulnerable, you will experience rejection. And as you experience rejection, you will be forced to upgrade your own sense of self worth. There’s no other option. Slowly, but surely you’ll chisel a “Don’t Give a Fuck” attitude out of yourself that is genuine yet giving at the same time".

"No more mr. nice guy" by Robert A. Glover tells you why you care about others perception so much and challenges you to put yourself first.

fredialim · 2016-02-17T00:28:58+00:00

My take is as follows: We all like validation and approval. When we can't get it from a healthy sense of our own self, we tend to seek it from external means.

I would suggest that you explore your own feelings of self acceptance, guilt, and shame. Two resources are Robert Glover (NMMNG) and John Bradshaw (he has several books and also videos on youtube).

Good luck!

Bigjohnthug · 2016-02-17T02:15:17+00:00

To get rid of the need for validation the two biggest things are to get enough of it and to evaluate your goals. In that order. Until you've had a lot of hot girls really 'like' you, you will be too scared to pull triggers. Plus that feeds into your confidence in its own way, showing you that you are attractive. Then over time you start to realize validation isn't satisfying and that feeds you the fuel to escalate. It also fills you with a mad rage at all the opportunities you missed by being too safe, as you were scared to pull the trigger and lose a girl who 'liked' you.

Title	Any tips or Books for extreminating seeking external validation
Author	TehJimmyy
Upvotes	6
Comments	5
Date	February 16, 2016 5:27 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/463ik8/any_tips_or_books_for_extreminating_seeking/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/any-tips-or-books-for-extreminating-seeking.1402564 https://theredarchive.com/post/1402564

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