How can i be more "fun" and "lighthearted"?

G_Refined · 2016-09-14T01:32:35+00:00

The best way to be more fun and lighthearted is to extrapolate on the persons answers more and joke around with them.

You: "What's you major?"

Her: "I'm an Art major."

You: "uh oh, are you the hipster art major that wears scarves in July? haha. I'm just teasing you, what type of art are you into?"

That type of banter will make you seem more fun and lighthearted.

recyclablebanthas · 2016-09-14T02:30:37+00:00

.As long there is something serious to talk about..... it's no problem for me.

Ironic you should mention this because you're taking yourself too seriously.

My problem is it's really hard for me to talk about things that are 'fun' or 'light-hearted',

but then I can never get any deeper than this surface level. I can't connect with people on an emotional level or anywhere beyond this.

Well, hold on here. You're talking about two problems here. Not one. Taking yourself too seriously, and wanting to connect on a deeper level. You do realize that connection doesn't happen by making people laugh, right?

If you want to be more light-hearted, fine. It's a useful skill anyway. Focus on looking at the world around you and looking for the ridiculous. Everything is ridiculous and interesting if you look at it in a certain way. Going to a bar? To drink toxic substances so we can puke them up later and talk about how drunk and stupid everyone was the night before? Pretty silly. You're ridiculous too. And the sooner you see that, the easier it is.
But this doesn't help you connect. Being a funny clown doesn't bring you closer really. Those informational questions you were discounting before, are the key. But instead of asking a question like, "What's your major?" getting an answer, and moving on to the next unrelated question, dig deeper into the answers you get off the first question. Stop changing the subject as if the person you're talking to didn't just hand you a bunch of useful information to steer the conversation to a better place.

When you ask a question, turn your smart brain off for a second and listen. Stop thinking about what to say because it's time to listen. Actively. Just sponge it all up. What they say, how they say it, body language, etc.

Then when they finish, take a second to think about what you just took in. And make your reply/next question/whatever, tailored to go deeper into the emotions or motivations of what she JUST said.

Example:

What's your major?
I'm majoring in, blah blah blah, with a minor in sho sho sho.
Blah blah blah, huh? What drew you to that?

And so on.

awgong · 2016-09-14T01:07:32+00:00

You just can't give a fuck. You can't talk about something fun because you think people will look at you differently because it may sounds stupid. You just can't think it like that. As long as you think something is fun, it's fun

Title	How can i be more "fun" and "lighthearted"?
Author	frankiexenon
Upvotes	1
Comments	5
Date	September 14, 2016 1:03 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/52o13p/how_can_i_be_more_fun_and_lighthearted/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-can-i-be-more-fun-and-lighthearted.1412414 https://theredarchive.com/post/1412414

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