Hey Seddit,

So I've been having a hard time getting back into the game and I need some tips, tricks, and other little truths to help me.

Context: I'm a 6' 2'' guy, 19 years old, 200 pounds. I'm in great shape, I'm attractive (been rated from anywhere between 7-10) I know how to dress and talk to girls. This is where everything starts to get tricky. Before my ex I was a player. I knew the game inside out. From the confrontation to the texting to the dating. Everything. That was until I met this girl who absolutely changed me. I became this guy who was all macho and emotionless to what she called a "softie" and was loving/caring (you know, boyfriend material). And for the first time in my life I fell in love. I'm not her but she said she fell in love too and I don't doubt it for a second. After a fantastic year of dating she became my world and (my mistake) put all my happiness in to her. Even though we had our ups and downs it was a relationship that had love and passion.

Towards the end of that year of dating a series of unfortunate events that was out of our control led to our break up and me being the changed guy I was who was head over heels in love completely lost it and the mild break turned into one that was completely terrible. I cried all the time and was everything you'd expect from a heart broken human being. That was until about a month after the break up I hit rock bottom. I drank like a fish and slept all the time. Didn't eat. Didn't go out. Didn't take care of myself. It was pitiful. But it gets worse. (Besides my therapist and my ex you guys are the only ones that know) I resorted to self harm. I started to cut myself on my right forearm. This was a guy who always smiled and laughed and was generally considered a happy person.

Fast forward to today after a lot of therapy and anti depressants. I started to work out religiously. The cuts have turned to scars though I know that if the right series of events happened I would easily go back to cutting. Luckily I live in south Florida not to far from Miami so I have easy access to a good nightlife and recently I've tried going out...a lot. But I've noticed that I've lost all my self confidence and I find it very hard if not impossible to approach a girl, whether it's at a club, the beach, bar etc.. Even though in my head I know what to do I get nervous and stand in place.

So seddit, help me...give me little exercises, morning rituals, anything to help me get back to my old self.

(I'm on mobile so sorry for any formatting issues)